Chapter 19 the truth comes out

"Sorry to drop by so late, I just." Cyntha starts.

"Oh, it's fine like I said I am here most of the time."

"I just wanted to thank you for all your help, as I am leaving town tomorrow. I will have to come back."

"Sit for a minute," Aziraphale points to a reading table. "I thought about what you said, earlier. I...I am not good at, well, uh um."

"Talking to people." she smiles.

"That and I can't all the way trust people. My best friend taught me that. I just..."

"And I understand why."

"You do..."

"Someone new comes in town that you don't know you want to protect the ones that you care deeply about."

"Anyways, I was talking to Crowley, who I think might be your father today. I wasn't sure I was even going to get to anymore."

"Why?"

"We left on bad terms and then the Bentley. His prize Bentley was in a wreck with a body in it. I had to go id this person, but it wasn't your father. That was the scariest thing I had to do. For I..."

"You love him, more than a friend don't you."

Aziraphale sighs, "I... I think I do, but do angels really love someone, I mean like other humans?"

"Then tell him, how you feel."

"What? I..I can't for it's," a pause, "It's not that simple, I mean," Almost shaking to where he can't even stand up straight Aziraphale goes to the desk and pulls out the book. "I have been struggling to." Aziraphale continues talking to Cyntha. Crowley sees the book that Aziraphale was holding on to. He knew exactly what book it was without really getting a good look at it.

"So your the one who took my book you little," Crowley was steaming and his fingers wanted to strangle Aziraphale right this moment.

"Yes, I took it from him." Aziraphale continues, knowing that Crowley might be able to hear them. "Well," Aziraphale 's eyes look up at the ceiling, "Borrowed really. I um..." Aziraphale licks he's lips. He shouldn't really be confessing to a stranger but he was. He felt some comfort in it. He had been struggling with himself for the past few days over what to do. "I found it left out and well, my curiosity got the better of me,"

"You know what happens to a curious cat."

"Yeah, I..." he turns his face to the side, "I...I swiped it from his house without another thought. I mean the guy was there when I needed him the most and...I did something to hurt him, what kind of friend does that? A naughty act, thought whatever you want to call it, came out. I never been like that before. I..."

"Love hAze."

"A what now?" Aziraphale had never heard of that before, must be a human thing. Something that he really didn't think he had in him.

"It's where you are deeply in love. Humans do things that they normally wouldn't do. And this might be yours or..."

'Or when we switched bodies,' Aziraphale really wants to add but no one needs to know that even happened but him and Crowley. Could that have been one of the side effects of their own doing? Aziraphale and Crowley had been acting out of the norm lately.

"You mean kinda like a crush thing?"

"Deeper then that but it's similar. Just you haven't really expressed it fully yet, which is why..."

"I didn't know he kept something like this all these years. I never..." Aziraphale just wants to change the subject but there was no real way to get off this subject, it had to come out. The sooner the better.

"Did you read it?"

"No," Aziraphale shakes his head, and sighs, "Well I can't lie I am an angel. I read a few pages, but I had an Epiphany it told me that this was all his 'for his eyes only' so I put it away. It's been in my desk ever since the day I took it."

"See that tells me you do respect him."

"I...I was going to take it back, but didn't know how without being well you know, bad."

"See again the goodness coming back out."

"But then again keeping it from him was a lot worse." Aziraphale sighs heavily, "If I tell him now, he will never forgive me. Maybe that would be for the best." Aziraphale gets up and starts pacing around.

"How do you figure that one?"

"Maybe this is my punishment for..."

"For what? I know you want to tell me." Cyntha smiles.

"We..."

"You and Crowley,"

"Yes, earlier, we..." Aziraphale glances around, trying to find the right words. "We...we made the ultimate sacrifice for each other."

"Sleeping with each other?" Aziraphale gives her a half-grin remembering how good it was to be held by Crowley that night.

"Define 'sleeping'," Aziraphale comments, the words just slip out of his mouth.

"Apparently not,"

"No," Aziraphale shakes off the naughty thought, trying to worm its way in his brain. "We, sacrificing each other lives, And I screwed it up. I don't deserve to be called an angel anymore." Tears rush Aziraphale eyes again. With his eyes all blurry he blinks.

"That's not true. Seems to me like the two of you are the purest of angels." Aziraphale twists his head, how was he or Crowley the purest of angels? "For that's the purest kind of love you can have." Aziraphale blinks. Was Cyntha right did both of them possess the purest of love that one can ever hold.

"Now, follow your heart. You will never go wrong." A whisper comes, then only silence.

"Aziraphale !" Crowley yells, from the top of the landing to the second floor where he had been sitting watching the two of them, listening to every word spoken. Aziraphale also, remembers that when Crowley uses his name it's usually a time for him to pay attention .

"Yes, Crowley," Aziraphale turns towards the more than angry voice. Swallowing, he knew that his judgment was coming for him.

"Remember this Aziraphale follow your heart." Another whisper comes this one closer to Aziraphale 's ear.

Aziraphale turns back around to tell Cyntha that he needs to face the music of his own making by himself, but

he finds that Cyntha was gone, nowhere to be seen. It was as if she just vanished without a sound.

To be continued...