"Wakey wakey…" came the voice, echoing through the empty blackness. Soon there was light, but just a thin beam cutting through the darkness that made her head hurt. It was her eyes, she realized. She slowly opened her eyes, wincing as her head felt like it was on fire and the bright light pierced her retinas like needles. "Oh good, our Princess has finally woke up from her beauty nap," the voice said, echoing in Weiss' throbbing brain. "I'm so flattered she decided to join us."
"W-wha…? Who…?" Weiss groaned. She tried to move her arms to rub her eyes, but she quickly noticed they were handcuffed behind her, and her legs were tied to the legs of the chair. She tugged at her restraints in panic, but they wouldn't budge. The sudden shock of this news woke her brain to full alert, though the actual pain in her head was still sharp and constant. That voice had been Roman Torchwick taunting her, sitting just a few feet from her in a backward metal chair. Neo Politan sat behind him, eyeing Weiss as she sharpened the hidden blade of her parasol. "Torchwick!" Weiss snapped. "Kidnapping? That's low, even for you!"
"Why is it always called 'kidnapping' when adults are involved?" he asked to no one in particular. Neo shrugged and resumed sharpening her blade. "But to the point at hand, nothing is beneath me, Ice Queen. At least, not when it comes to Neo and I's survival."
"And how does kidnapping me ensure your survival? You're a petty thief and she's a crazed killer!" Weiss protested, still struggling against her restraints. Neo rested her fingers on her collarbone in a mock display of shock, as if she were saying 'Me? A killer?' before she broke down in hysterical silent giggles. Roman smirked and effortlessly twirled Melodic Cudgel to rest on his shoulder.
"Let me give you a bit of a history lesson. In this world, there are two types of people - the Haves and the Have-Nots. You're a Have, Neo and I are Have Nots. Your kind, the rich, the elite, the powerful, have all the shortcuts and blessings in the world they could want, but it's never enough, so they take from the Have-Nots. You call me a petty thief, yet the SDC is responsible for crimes that would get a single person sent to the electric chair!" he said, staring Weiss right in the eye. The point about the SDC hurt, as Weiss couldn't argue with it.
"I'm…I'm not my Father…" Weiss finally said. "I'm not responsible for his sins."
"Maybe not," Roman relented, "but you still benefited from them. Growing up in silks and pearls and perfumes while Neo and I struggled to even put food in our mouths."
"You rob and kill people!" Weiss yelled back. "That does not make it okay!"
"It's not about being okay, sweetheart, it's about surviving!" Roman said, pointing a gloved finger at Weiss. Neo nodded, her eyes never leaving Weiss.
"This conversation is pointless," Weiss huffed. "Ruby will be coming to rescue me any moment."
"Oh, if you think Red is coming to bail you out, you're mistaken. Red's dead, sweetheart. Your wife ain't coming."
"I don't believe you." Weiss snarled. "What did you do to her?! How did I even get here? I remember driving my car from the store and then there was a little girl who ran in front and I swerved and….there was no little girl, was there?"
"There was, in a way. Neo here simply made you think you saw a little girl version of herself. Her Semblance has gotten quite strong, I might add. I'm proud of my little ice cream cone." he said, planting a quick peck on her cheek. Neo blushed.
"And so I ran my car into a tree and you kidnapped me and left Ruby to die…" Weiss said quietly, piecing it together. "But why me?"
"Because there's a war coming, Ice Queen," Roman said, his mood suddenly darkening. "I was foolish enough to think that aligning myself with the winning side would be enough, but then it slowly dawned on me, there is no winning side. Not with her, not with them. And the worst part? Nothing can stop her. Nothing. You and your little friends and your wife think you have a chance, but no one does."
"So what does kidnapping me have to do with Salem?" Weiss said back. "You didn't answer my question."
"I'm getting there, sweetheart, patience. See, I realized that the only way to survive is to get as far as way from here as possible. Now I could go back to knocking off small-time dust shops, but that's not going to help get what I need."
"And that is?"
"Paradise!" Roman shouted, excitement all over his face. "A tropical island off the coast of Vacuo, completely uninhabited and ripe with lush vegetation and enough resources to last us a long time. The only problem is, the asking price for is it a bit too high for my liking. The billionaire who owns it won't let it go without full payment. And that's where you come in! Daddy Schneebucks will gladly pay an exuberant amount of Lien if it means getting his precious daughter back."
Weiss couldn't help but smirk at the idea of Roman and Neo somehow surviving off of an island in the middle of nowhere.
"I never pictured you the farming type," Weiss said. "But if this is your master plan, why haven't you enacted it yet?"
"Because I wanted to make sure you're awake to see this. Neo? Are we ready?" Roman asked. Neo had her Scroll out and nodded, dialing a number and handing the phone off to her Dum Dum. Weiss watched as the Scroll went through the motions of establishing a connection before the screen lit up with the face of Jacques Schnee.
"Who is this? How did you get this number? This is a private number!" he bellowed. Roman just smiled as Neo stood behind me, holding the blade of her parasol just inches from Weiss' throat, making sure she was in full view of the Scroll's camera.
"Good morning, Pops! Allow me to introduce myself - I'm the man who is in control of your daughter's life."
Jacques squinted his eyes and immediately scowled when he saw Weiss in her state of predicament.
"Hello, Father," Weiss said dryly. The elder Schnee just grunted in disapproval.
"Am I supposed to pay for her safe return? Is that how this game works?" he fumed. Neo held the blade even closer to Weiss' throat, stopping just short of cutting the skin. Weiss' nerves were on edge, but she didn't want to give them the satisfaction of them seeing her afraid.
"She's gonna go home, either way, Pops. The question is, how many pieces? One? Or several?" Roman oozed with a wicked grin.
"I do not negotiate with terrorists," Jacques said flatly. "And besides, despite her name and regal upbringing, I surprisingly have no daughter. My oldest decided to run off to play army and Weiss had decided she'd rather chase Monsters and marry into a poor, lower-class family than do what's right for our bloodline. This is a waste of my time. Never call this number again." and he hung up, leaving a black screen flashing 'DISCONNECTED' on it. There was a moment of silence as all three participants sat in absolute quiet before Weiss erupted into hysterical laughter.
'And people say I'm crazy!' Neo signed to Roman. Roman hurled the Scroll across the abandoned SDC warehouse that had been his makeshift HQ for this operation and kicked over a nearby empty crate, his rage and frustration bubbling over.
"You really thought he would care about me?" Weiss snorted with dark laughter. "You think Jacques Schnee would care about anyone but himself?"
"Okay, okay, new plan…new plan…" Roman muttered, now frantically pacing. "There has to be someone who's willing to cough up the cash for her. Do you have any rich aunties or uncles? No…hmmm…"
Weiss was still laughing when something caught the corner of her eye. It wasn't much, but she swore she saw a blur of red zoom past two stacked piles of rotting crates. She didn't want to get her hopes up, but the rose petals gently falling to the ground made her heart sing. Thankfully, neither Neo nor Roman seemed to notice.
'Maybe hold the kingdom ransom?' Neo said using sign language. 'Threaten to blow up a bomb and kill her unless the kingdom pays?'
"Perhaps, perhaps…" Roman said, scratching his chin. "But which kingdom? Vale? Atlas? Definitely not Vacuo…"
And then like a flower-scented thunderbolt, a streak of red and rose petals blurred across the cracked concrete floor aiming straight from Roman. Neo pushed him out of the way and deflected Crescent Rose with her blade, her face now filled with anger. With a click, Roman aimed Melodic Cudgel right at Ruby's temple, stopping her from advancing any further. One eye was swollen shut, she had a fat lip and a large bruise on her forehead, but she was alive.
"Well, Red, it looks like you're alive, but not for long. Make one more move and I'll empty your head further than it already is," he smirked. Ruby ignored him and instead turned her head to look directly at Weiss.
"Stay calm. Snowflake. I'm going to get you out of here." she said defiantly. Neo rolled her eyes, as Ruby lowered the blade of Crescent Rose, but still kept a tight grip on the handle.
"I know smarts isn't exactly your forte, Red, but you are outnumbered. You should have brought backup, my dear." Roman taunted.
"Oh wow, that's a pretty good idea. Wish I had thought of that," Ruby said with just the tiniest of smirks dancing at the corner of her mouth. "Oh, what I did," she added. To punctuate this, a large metal garage door flung off its hinges from a mighty blow from Magnhild and standing behind it was the rest of the RWBY, plus Nora and Coco.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't Tits McGee and the Broad Squad. If I had known I was having company, I would have made some delightful appetizers for you. Do you like those fancy meats in tiny plastic swords?" Roman queried.
"Who's Tits McGee?" Nora whispered to Blake.
"Yang. He's talking about Yang." Blake whispered back.
"Oh…yeah, she does have pretty big funbags." Nora hushed in reply.
"Nice hat," Coco said, keeping Gianduja pointed right at Roman. "Does your Grandpa know you're borrowing his clothes? Either way, I'd keep those hands above your head."
"I certainly don't want any trouble," Roman said, raising his hands above his head. "I guess I'll just go quietly with you to the police and serve mytimeUNLESS-I-THROW-THIS-SMOKE-BOMB!" and with a quick reach in his pocket, Roman tossed a tiny ball that exploded into a massive cloud of thick black smoke. With everyone too busy coughing through the mess and unable to see past their own face, it was Blake who could hear Neo rushing through the smoke and managed to get Gambol Shroud's and it's sheath up at the very last moment, deflecting her blade. Neo grinned and parried away, going to for a stab, but Blake countered with a spin-out of the way and delivered a solid kick to Neo's face that stunned her.
"Nora! Now!" she yelled.
"BATTER UP!" the thunder goddess yelled and swung with all of her strength at the pint-sized assassin. The heavy head of Magnhild connected and 'Neo' instantly shattered into what looked like thousands of glass pieces. "Oh my gods, I broke her!" Nora wailed. "I smashed her to pieces!"
"No, it's not her, it's an illusion," Yang hissed. "It means they're getting away!"
Yang and the rest ran out from the smoke to see a tiny airship piloted by Roman fly off in the distance.
"Goodbye, losers!" Roman yelled as he hit the thrusters and disappeared into the night sky. Meanwhile, back inside, Ruby had cut the handcuffs and leg restraints off off using the blade of Crescent Rose and absorbed her wife into a hug.
"How did you find me?" Weiss asked, wiping the tears from Ruby's eyes.
"Oh…" Ruby said blushing. "That was easy. You never logged out of your Rokeman Go account, so I just followed your character on the map till it lead me here."
"You guys okay?" Yang said, heading back in.
"Yeah, we're fine," Weiss replied. "Ruby cut my handcuffs off."
"Really? I figured she'd want to save those for the bedroom."
"YANG!" Ruby and Weiss said at the same time. Yang just chuckled.
"You two dorks are so perfect for each other. C'mon, let's go home."