This Morning:
Hey everyone!

I know this is not a chapter and thus technically not allowed here. But I let you down and I need to apologize.

After reading your comments and your critics I reviewed my story. You are right. I decided to not post new chapters for a while. That doen't mean I'm terminating this Story, though I really thought about it. I'm just as frustrated as you guys are with where I was going...Things got so out of hand here, I don't know if I could still do you all justice and I am sorry I didn't realize it sooner.

So I decided to rewrite chapters 17-22. The plot will change, it wont be as slowpaced as before. I don't want to disappoint you guys and I want you to be happy. And you are right, they were very OoC. I'm gonna scratch Tony's relationship with Emily out of the story and it will be more Pepper/Tony centered. Also no more fighting and them growing back together more quickly. You wont have your happy relationship ending right away though, but the progress they'll make to get to gether will be much faster.

I'm sorry I let you down. But I heard you and I will try to improve in my new attempt. So please stay with me as I try to make this right for you. I will Update with the new chapter 17 on Monday. I promise. I now just need a little faith and a chance to make it up to you all.

Thank you.

Now:
Hello again. I know I'm unnerving you. I unnerve myself, too. A lot. Anxiety sucks...

I decided to post 17-22 again, until I decided what to do. Taking them down was an overreaction on my side. And I apologize.
Though I still don't know/think I'm going to continue this exact plot after Ch. 22. At the moment I feel like I just can't. It's not the reviewers fault!
My problem is I wrote chapter 23 and 24 already (thats why I have a sneak) and I hated them and rewrote them two times already and still hate them. I feel like I'm stuck, and then people said they got frustrated and discontinue reading and honestly, I realized I am frustrated with the plot too, that's why it didn't work out anymore. I feel like I'm in too deep to get them out again and I hate that. It's like I created the problem, than it got out of hand and now I don't know how to fix it. I'm just... I dunno sad. But not because of your reviews. I know what I want to tell, but I somehow can't. Maybe I'll post the rewrites as sort of a "what/if" spin off. I don't know anymore. For now, you'll get chapter 17-22 back.

And to make one thing clear, I always have two (unpolished) chapters in my pipeline and every time I update, it's after I wrote a new one. Before I post a new chapter it will get a major walkthrough and sometimes I even rewrite most/big parts. Otherwise the sneaks wouldn't be possible. So yes, I said I wont write until after Christmas, and that meant: I won't touch 23, 24 until then again, but the main part and plot is already written. Also I didnt want to start on 25 until after Christmas, which has to be written before I put 23 out. But I am unhappy how they turned out, still I included the sneak peak. But like I said, I totally got the reviews and figured out why I hated 23 and 24 so much. It's like a knot I can't untangle... If I have a major breakthrough over Christmas I'll let you know. But the more I think about it, I think I'll rewrite the chapters. Until then I'm giving you the old ones back. But For now I need a little time and space to think...

But one thing: I wanted to thank you to everyone who believes in me and who reviewed, whether it was criticism or cheering me on. I'm not mad at anyone, I am just... stuck. and unhappy with my writing. and lost. mostly lost, I guess :'D

Chapter 21: Begin again

I don't really want to say much. Just thanks for your reviews! Just so you don't get me wrong: I like each and every review, even if you don't like the chapter I wrote. I'm trying to improve (:

Next week I will update on Tuesday, not Monday. I'm sorry, but I'm invited to a Christmas party on Monday night. :D
Also I probably won't have time to write over Christmas, cause my family is huge. So next week might be the last update for 2019. But I'll let you know next week. Maybe I manage to put something small together and manage write a chapter, if I find the motivation.

Great, now I have said more than I wanted... :D Happy reading, y'all.

Song: Begin again by Taylor Swift, but my inspiration came from the cover by the Piano guys ft. Megan Nicole and Alex Groot. You should chck it out some time:)

Begin again

Her Wednesday had been pretty good so far. The meetings with R'n'D that morning had gone smooth, now that Tony was back on track and ready to finish the previously started walkthrough.

The board had also approved of the new outline for Stark Tower in New York and they had been actually pretty pleased with her work and how she had managed to get Tony fully on board. It had also been the first meeting for Pepper, where most of the board members had talked to her directly instead of Tony, because before they had forgot she was CEO now or because they still questioned her reputation. It looked like the constant reminders, by either her or Tony were over and she had finally made herself a name and was being taken seriously as the CEO.

After the board meeting Tony had gone to the facility to see how the new element functioned with a bigger version of the arc reactor, instead of his small one, as Pepper had attended another meeting regarding one of their legal cases.

Unfortunately said meeting with legal had gone way longer than she had expected and she had texted Tony he should go ahead without her and go to their lunch location "Coffeeni" to meet the rest, she would be joining them shortly after.
When Pepper finally got to the small cafe twenty minutes late, it had started raining and she was grateful Happy had a spare umbrella in his vehicle. As she stepped into the small cafe she closed her umbrella and looked around to see if she'd spot their group.

The cafe had dark wood along the walls, with various small nooks to sit in, topped of with very comfy looking armchairs. All around they'd put different styles of tables and stools, yet it seemed to belong together in an oddly satisfying way and there was music playing in the background. The air smelled like coffee and panini bread and the place was full with people.
Rhodey and Tony were sitting in a small nook in the back of the cafe, but from where Pepper stood she couldn't see them, there were too many people in between, blocking her view. Tony, however, had seen her the minute she had set foot into the location. She was standing in the entrance, dressed in a beige trench coat, black pencil-skirt, purple blouse and her signature black heels, a silver Stark Industries umbrella in hand. He stood and waved, trying to catch her eye.

Once Tony had caught her eye, she waved back at him and began heading towards him, as well.
"Hi, sorry I'm late. The meeting with legal went on for forever. I thought Harrison would never finish. Am I the last one?" Pepper rambled as she met Tony half way, who had started walking up to er as well to greet her. He was wearing the same black suite like this morning, except he had shed his suit jacket and rolled up the arms.

"No, Alex just texted Rhodey and said he got stuck in a meeting as well and should be here in a few minutes, and Emily is stuck in traffic. The rain, you know?" Tony explained, and casually put a hand on her back to guide her through the crowd. Though the moment Tony placed his hand on the small of her back she noticed how much she had missed those small contacts between them. Yet she tried ignoring the tingle pooling in her lower abdomen, that slowly started spreading through her entire body. To distract herself she pulled out her phone to check whether she had any messages from her boyfriend as well. And she did. When Pepper looked at her phone she really had received a text from Alex as well, saying he'd be running late.

Once they reached the table Rhodey and Tony had picked, Rhodey stood to greet her and gave her a warm hug. Tony pulled her chair out for her and helped her settle, before he sat back down himself, next to Rhodey, facing the crowd, while Pepper had her back to the entrance.
"Thank you." Pepper said surprised and smiled at him. "Rhodey, how have you been?"

"Good, good. Though this moron over here had me very scared for a moment two weeks ago." He nudged Tony with his elbow, while he in return shrugged and nodded at the same time.

"I guess he had us all scared." Pepper agreed, but they all laughed it off, now that Tony was good and healthy again. "Have you guys ordered already?"

"Drinks. We wanted to wait with the food till everyone has arrived." Rhodey explained.

"Oh ok." Pepper said, somewhat uncomfortable. "I just don't have too much time, I have the next meeting in an hour and I have to get back to Stark Industries. So I will order lunch, if that's alright."

"Of course." Rhodey said and smiled at her. "I guess we can order as well and when Emily and Alex arrive I just wait for them till they're finished. I'm totally free this afternoon."

Right on clue the waitress appeared with a flat white for Tony and a latte for Rhodey. Pepper ordered a cappuccino for herself and a salad, when her phone started ringing.
"Hey B, sorry I'm running late. I just finished the meeting and I'm on my way. I'll be there in ten minutes. Can your order a milkshake and a caprese panini for me?" He asked her on the phone.

"Don't worry, Alex. I've only been here for a few minutes myself and Emily has yet to arrive, too. Chocolate or vanilla shake?" She asked.

"Doesn't matter. Make a choice. Can't wait to see ya." He finished.

"Alright. Yeah, me too. Bye." She hung up and excused herself to go find their waitress and place Alex's order.
When she returned to her table Rhodey and Tony were talking about new upgrades and bug fixes for the Warmashine suit, so she sat quietly next to them, not really paying attention to their conversation. Suddenly familiar tones wavered through the cafe and made her ears peak up. It were he first tunes of "Don't stop me now" by Queen. Somehow this song always reminded her of Tony.
"I love that song." She piped out, more to her self than her company.

Tony's head snapped over at her and Pepper turned bright red. "Excuse me, what did you say?" He asked genuinely.

"Oh nothing of importance. I just said I really like that song." She smiled sheepishly and Tony spiked his ears listening to the tunes wavering through the cafe.

"Isn't it "Don't stop me now" by Queen?" Tony asked, while Rhodey was already humming along.

Pepper nodded, then furrowed her brows. "How do you know? I thought you only listen to ACDC and Back Sabbath."

"That's not true, Pepper. I have told you before, sometimes I listen to other music as well. This one is on your playlist. And I happen to like it very much." He said and smiled at her.

"Besides this one's a classic." Rhodey commented.

"Oh, you're right." Pepper realized. "I haven't listened to my playlist in forever." She said matter of factly, not noticing the weird looks Rhodey and Tony were giving her.

"Why not? Too busy?" Rhodey asked sympathetically, but she realized he had involuntarily hit a nerve right there.

"Well, Alex and I don't really agree in music tastes. He is more about country and folk, which I don't really like and he hates classic rock and pop. So we compromise and don't listen to music when we're together." She sighed a little and shrugged. "And yeah, the rest of the time I'm at work."

"Hold up." Tony interjected. "So you're saying you're basically don't listen to music any more?" He asked in shock.

"No, it's not like that. I listen to the radio in the car or when I'm cleaning my kitchen, but I just don't actively listen to music as much as I did before I met Alex." She tried reassuring them, but she actually was a little sad. Now that she thought about it, she really missed her music, but to be honest it was a small sacrifice for the awesome boyfriend she got in exchange, and she could always listen to her music on her phone or during sports.

"I still think it's weird. I mean I get different tastes in music and stuff, but… making you stop listen, because he doesn't like it…" Tony trailed off, not knowing what to say any further.

"It's not that he doesn't let me listen to it. It's just we can't agree on the same genre… He complains when I'm listening to my stuff and honestly one can only listen to Shanaya Twayn every so often before you go insane…" She defended, but was interrupted by Tony.

"I like your music taste and I'm glad JARVIS discovered your playlist. Just your small obsession with show tunes is slightly concerning." He teased and shrugged matter of factly.

"Shut up, Tony!" She retorted. "No-one forces you to listen to my playlist. And besides Wicket is a freaking, timeless masterpiece."

"True that." Rhodey agreed and toasted to her with his latte.

"It even won a Tony Award." Tony informed Rhodey in a high girly voice, obviously imitating Pepper very badly, earning him a swat on the arm by her. "I should know, it's named after me after all."

"No it's not." Pepper said curtly, looking at Rhodey unnerved. He in return chuckled at their behavior. It was nice seeing them getting along again.
To be honest at first he had been very worried about the whole Emily situation making things between Tony and Pepper worse, because he too thought it was way too fast having a girl move in with Tony. But Emily was genuinely a nice, pleasant girl to be around and it seemed like her presence actually helped Pepper relax and ease into her own new relationship. And she seemingly was very happy with Alex, while Tony had been actually talking less about himself (or Pepper for the matter) but hat basically raved about Emily. And Rhodey did believe him, when Tony told him how lucky he felt to have found this girl. It really seemed like he was, well maybe not falling in love with her just yet, but at least settling for her.
Yet, in this nook in a cafe with just the three of them, Rhodey couldn't shake the feeling there was more to their behavior than just new found respect and the lack of guilt tripping. It almost looked like the old spark between them had been reignited.

"If you say so." Tony winked and chuckled at Pepper.

"What does Emily listen to?" Rhodey asked, trying to lighten the mood before the bickering got out of hand.

"Oh gosh." Tony laughed and closed his eyes. "Don't ask." He waved his hand and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"That bad?" Rhodey asked and Pepper looked bemused at Tony, who was mock-upset, trying to suppress a smile herself.

"Just one word and we'll never talk about it again. Boy groups." He concluded and opened one eye.

Rhodey spluttered "You're kidding!"

"No. Take that, Backstreet-Boys, NSYNC. You name it she got it…" Tony took a deep breath as the waitress arrived with their food, Pepper's coffee and Alex's milkshake. Behind her, Alex had made his way over to their table as well.

"Hi, hi, hi everybody." He waved hastily at Rhodey and Tony, before he kissed his girlfriend on the cheek and sat next to her. "Sorry I'm late. The meeting with my general took for ever." He stressed the last to words to emphasize just how upset he's was. "That guy doesn't know when to quit…" He rolled his eyes and took a sip from his milkshake.

"General Meyers?" Rhodey asked knowingly.

"You know it, bro." Alex replied, sighing. "How did the meeting with the pilots go?"

But before Rhodey could answer, Emily appeared behind Pepper and Alex as well.

"Hew." She blew out and moved toward the seat between Tony and Pepper at the end of the table. "Hey everyone! I'm so sorry. Traffic was a mess." After she hung her jeans jacket over her chair she bent to give Pepper a hug. Pepper, who admittedly hadn't expected it awkwardly stood up halfway and returned the hug a little halfheartedly. She proceeded to pat Alex shoulder in greeting and shook Rhodey's hand over the table, since she couldn't reach him from where she stood.
"Hey Tone." She greeted Tony and he let her kiss him square on the mouth.

Pepper, pointedly trying to not look at the pair while they were kissing, found one of her sun-dried tomatoes very interesting and inspected it intensely.
What she didn't notice though, because she was too busy looking at a piece of basil, was that Tony didn't even think about helping his girlfriend into her chair.

And though Pepper didn't notice, Rhodey did, but kept it to himself. It was neither the place, nor the time to open a can of worms and seeing how good Pepper and Tony were getting along at the moment, he didn't want to jinx it.

The five of them continued eating, drinking and chatting. Even Tony and Alex seemed to be getting along, albeit they barely really talked to one another.
Rhodey noticed Pepper had gotten considerably more quiet since Alex and Emily had arrived, though she seemed to listen to their conversations and laughed along.
At one point Tony described a situation, he Rhodey and Pepper had had years ago. It actually had been the first time they had been together in Vegas. Coincidentally it had been Pepper's first time to Vegas ever. Long story short, Tony had gotten lost and somehow managed to end up butt naked in the lake in front of Bellagio during the water fountain ballet, singing Sinatras My Way. That had also been the first of many very elaborated PR nightmares for Pepper Potts. She had actually taken a two week vacation after they returned to LA, which had only actually lasted for two days until Tony hadn't been able to handle it anymore without her and had started calling her every fifteen minutes until she had surrendered and returned to work.

Everyone laughed, and especially Alex nearly cried with laughter. Rhodey noticed though, that Pepper turned red ever so slightly and smiled more to herself than she openly laughed. Also it seemed like she did everything to avoid looking at Tony. Yet when Alex took her hand, she beamed at her boyfriend, and pressed his hand affectionately.
In this moment it looked like Tony stopped dead in his tracks for a split second, fixated on the other couples joined hands, before he put his smile back on and grinned at his own silly story again.
Their behavior was so odd to Rhodey. They both looked so happy with their respective partner, yet it was like they couldn't handle seeing the other one being happy. Though it didn't seem like it was jealousy per se, it was more like it was hurting them.

Shortly after they all finished their meals, Pepper got a call from her secretary Bambi, demanding she needed to return, because the New York State Secretary kept calling asking for a few information regarding Stark Tower.
"Sorry, I have to leave. I really stretched my lunch break and I'm needed at Stark's." She said apologetically and packed her phone back into her handbag, taking her wallet out to pay on her way out.

"Do you need a lift, B?"Alex asked her lovingly, hand gently placed on her forearm. "And don't worry about the meal. I'll pay it."

"Thank you. And no, I'll call Happy to pick me up on my way out." Pepper answered, gently smiling at him. "Stark Industries is in the opposite direction from where you're headed."

"You sure? I don't mind." Alex offered again, while she put on her trench coat.

"I am. I'll see you tonight, though." Pepper said and kissed him gently good bye.

"Pepper, wait." Tony called after her out of the blue, when she had placed her chair back at the table and had taken two steps towards the exit. "I need to go back to Stark Industries, too. You can ride with me. No need to call Happy." He had already stood up and put on his suit jacket, when she saw he was putting his phone away as well. He pressed a quick kiss to his girlfriends mouth, but before he reached Pepper, he turned around to Alex and Rhodey. "Lunch's on me, by the way." And he threw a hundred dollar bill onto the table.

"Good bye to you, too!" Rhodey called after him, mock hurt.

"Where did you park?" Pepper asked as they stepped outside, sadly it hadn't stopped raining.

"Just around the next corner." Tony said and pointed to the far end of their block. "I still can't believe we went to a place, that hasn't got valet-parking." He sighed, but Pepper chuckled. He took the umbrella from her hands and opened it for them to share the small space underneath. He could be a gentleman after all.

"Hey, it was your girlfriend to that wanted to go here." Pepper teased and smiled, before she stepped next to him and huddled herself close to him to avoid getting hit by the downpour.

"I know." Tony sighed dramatically. "The things we do for love…" The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. Tony had meant them metaphorically, funny even, but he wasn't sure whether Pepper took them seriously. It shouldn't affect him either way, but he didn't want it to be weird between him and Pepper again and he didn't want to stir the freaking pot again.

When they spoke next the did it simultaneously.
"Do you though?" Pepper asked and turned a little pink, looking at the puddles on the pavement.
"About Stark Tower…" Tony started and they both stopped and looked at each other wide eyed, not sure what to do. After a few awkward moments they both started chuckling.

"You go first." Pepper said, happy to get an escape from the question that had nearly burned her tongue. She wished they weren't in such close proximity, huddled together to fit under the small umbrella. She felt herself flush and was sure Tony must feel the heat suddenly radiating from her body. She honestly didn't even knew why she had asked the question. In all honesty, she really was afraid of the answer, though she wasn't sure what would be worse: Him still not being over her or him actually being in love with the girl. She was torn between the possibilities, though she found herself dreading the idea of him really loving Emily more.

"Ok." Tony himself was happy, he didn't have to answer Pepper's question and too forego the can of worms he had opened himself. "I said I have another idea for Stark Tower."

"Another-one?" Pepper asked, half shocked, half exasperated and stopped suddenly, all thoughts about Emily suddenly leaving her head. This caused Tony to walk past her and she, not expecting it, was hit with the pouring rain. In response she shrieked and ran back up to Tony. "We changed the plans eleven times already. Changing them again is such a pain in the ass… And the board... I'm finally taken seriously by them." She groaned and sounded very exasperated.

"It will be the last change, I promise. I know Stark Tower is your baby, but I want the penthouse to be my penthouse. Also I will talk to the board if that makes things easier for you." He stated.

"Your penthouse? But why? You hate New York." She claimed.

"That's only partly true. For one I think with the Stark Industries location in New York, we need a new home base there, for business trips. The old town house? Not so sexy. It's old, outdated in technical regards and security… Honestly I don't even know why I bought it in the first place… Second, I only hate New York, because of the old town house, but I don't hate New York for itself. I had some of my best childhood moments there… Christmas in the city was always magical…" He trailed off. Christmas and his childhood in general were always very delicate topics for Tony and Pepper knew it. The last Christmas he had spent in new York had been the Christmas before his parents death.

"I know. I always loved Christmas season in New York, too." Pepper told him in a comforting way when the finally reached the car. "My family came to visit me one year and we did the whole touristy thing. Ice skating at Rockefeller Center, sleighing in Central Park and all that stuff… It really is magical."

They were standing next to the passenger seat now, the rain still pouring down on their umbrella, which Tony was still holding in place. "We used to watch this very old movie each and every year." Tony stated and Pepper's breath hitched in her throat. It was the first time since she had known him, that he actually talked about his childhood Christmases and she felt a warmth spread through her body with the thought that he still trusted her so much. "Unfortunately I don't recall its name."

"Maybe JARVIS can look it up for you?" Pepper asked softly, gazing up at him, not wanting to break the spell.

Tony chuckled at the thought. "I don't even remember what it's really about."

"Oh, ok." Pepper laughed awkwardly in return. "You really don't recall any details?"

"There was a man. And a woman. A few women actually. It was in black and white." He answered and really furrowed his brows as if he was in deep thought.

"Wow." Pepper deadpanned. "That's… a lot. Very detailed." She smiled at him, enjoying their banter once and again.

"In my defense that was about 20 years ago." He said mock-hurt.

"Forgive me. I forgot you had Alzheimers. Aren't you supposed to be a genius?" She mocked him further, happy that the mood was light hearted and not sad and dark, what could've happened easily with such an heavy topic like Christmas.

"I am a genius." He said sternly. "That doesn't mean I'm omniscient."

"You always behave like it is…" Pepper mumbled under her breath.

"You wanted a ride, didn't you?" He asked in a mocking tone himself, while opening the door for her. Something he had rarely done for her in the past.

"Happy would be the preferred ride every day." She retorted smiling sweetly at him.

He laughed at her quip. It was real, hearty laugh and to be honest, she had really missed the sound. It was so good to be able to talk to each other again. "Come on get inside." He said as they reached his car and she climbed inside.

When Rhodey emerged from the cafe as well, he hugged Emily and promised Alex to call him later this week. Both of them headed in the opposite direction than he was. On his way to his car he noticed a couple standing next to a silver Audi R8 Spider, huddled close under an umbrella. The woman was a tall, thin red head, wearing a beige trench coat and the man had black hair and was in a black suit. It took Rhodey longer than he liked to admit, until he noticed it were his two best friends.

Tony was listening to something Pepper was apparently saying and threw his head back laughing, like a little boy.

It seemed like those two could overcome anything. After constantly being at each others throats over the last eight month it looked like the spark between them had been gone for good. But today, on an ordinary Wednesday, in an average cafe he had watched it begin again. And if he wasn't mistaken, and they could claim different as much as they wanted, this thing between them was far from over.

Thanks for reading :) I hope it wasn't too cheesy. We're now in the middle of Phase III.
And here's your sneak peak for next week:

"It was everything I could have ever asked for." Pepper confirmed and looked down at him. "In fact this hayloft was one of my favorite places. I'd always play here with my brother and when I was sad, I'd come here to think…" She said and smiled in memory.

"One of your favorite?" Tony asked. "What can be better than this?" He pointed up to the hayloft.

"I'll show you." She said and started to climb down.

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