Victorya's funeral was on a snowy day, it was planned quick so I could attend. Command for once understood how this was a day that I couldn't miss so I was able to have the day free. But it wouldn't have mattered if they did or did not give permission, I was going to be there no matter what.

The empire could have been getting attacked from all fronts, but it wouldn't have stopped me from attending today. I stared at her gravestone, Victorya's family paid for the whole thing, her mom even invited me to stay with them for the night.

I lied saying that I had a place to sleep, I didn't. I knew that if I was around Victorya's childhood home it would be too much. Being around her old dolls, dresses, seeing photos of her would of made me have a mental breakdown.

I lightly rubbed the snow off of her gravestone, as I tucked my knees to my chest and sat down. Her name was in big letters, I could never forget them.

"Hey darling." I whispered

She didn't say anything as I wrapped my arms tighter around myself, I should have ended it, at least I would have been free from this meaningless life. Why was I so much of a coward.

"...I met your mom...she told me how happy she was when you wrote to her...I didn't know how you told her about the marriage."

A brief image passed in my head of Victorya frantically writing down to her mother explaining how I proposed to her, just seeing her bite her pen as she tried to find a way to write something like that down without completely freaking out her mom.

Even for a second, I couldn't help but smile. She was airheaded, timid, but she loved me and I loved her. I don't think I could ever find anything like that ever again in this world, what me and her had could never be replaced or restored.

"Your mom offered to give me a place to sleep tonight…" I said as tears began to stream off of my eyes

This wasn't fair, why did it have to be her? I would have given up my life gladly, I tried my best to protect her but I failed.

I failed, I was a failure as a man, a lover, and a father. There was nothing for me here anymore, only this anger and sadness that I felt deep within my heart.

There was nothing left for me, nothing. I pressed my head to my knees as my body began to violently shake. It would have looked to any passerby that I was shivering from the cold as I felt my fingernails drive deep into my pants.

"Why god?" I said as I stared up into the sky, the tears feeling like needles that stung

"Sixteen years...sixteen goddamn years and you have nothing to say...you useless fuck!" I shot up from the ground and screamed into the sky like a madman

"You sent me on a quest to find somebody without even giving me there name...you screwed me you fuck!" I growled like an animal after the last sentence

This feeling, this beast inside of me wanted to rip and tear me in half from the inside out. But I couldn't care less, there was nothing for me.

No hope...the light was snatched right in front of my eyes. What was there to do?

"Answer me!" I yelled out, my voice went hoarse as pigeons and other animals flew away from my voice

But then they immediately stopped, it was like they were frozen in time. But then memories of another life began to flood into my head, I had something to do...a mission. How could I have forgotten after this long.

"Hello my son." a voice that could only be described as pure beamed from right behind me

He was the lawman, a face that I hadn't seen in sixteen years. A person that in this life that shouldn't exist, his eyes were glowing an unnatural yellow as they stared down at me.

"Bring her back" I growled feeling my teeth grind

"Excuse me."

"Did I stutter...bring back my Victorya!" I screamed as I clutched my stomach, it hurt a lot from all the yelling.

"I can't"

"Why?" I asked as I fell down to my knees and hung my head low, the tears falling like little droplets of rain as they painted the snow.

"Cause it is not the natural order of things...Im sorry but this is the way things must be."

"You made an exception for me...I was supposed to die sixteen years ago...but look here I am." I pleaded as I pounded my chest, my chest hurt but the pain was proof that I was alive in this world.

"That was different...you were assigned to a special mission and you were the perfect candidate for the plan."

"Yes the plan, it wouldn't matter if you forgot the mission. If you failed to convert this person...then someone else will take your place, or this person's life will be taken."

Wait he mentioned something about forgetting the mission, I have been in this world for years and I had maybe thought about the mission only a couple of times. It's been even harder remembering my past life as I kept on getting older.

"Wait I have been forgetting memories, people that I know I should remember...experiences that only come up if I think hard enough...but why?"

His iridescent yellow eyes stared at me under that thick cowboy hat. "Your life was tough, as a result you internally wish to forget...you lack the struggle of wanting to remember your past. This is the opposite towards the persons whose faith you must change."

"But I don't understand, I have dreams like the time I used the type 95 wh…"

"I blessed the computation gem...due to certain circumstances you developed a way to detect certain possibilities."

"Possibilities?"

"You can see certain paths, one simple choice that you make can completely divulge you from your path and send you too one compleatly different...possibilities to see a particular future.

"Why, isn't it supposed to help a mage in battle. Not some fortune teller."

"My blessings impact people in different ways...but realize how your paths are winding and can be changed by a simple choice."

Why was he here, was he trying to remind me of the mission. But what would it matter if I forgot about it in a year or so.

"This person...who are they?"

His eyes went cold, as everything went still and quiet. "I can not tell you...but I will heed you with three warnings."

As he uttered those words I could feel everything beginning to work again, the birds that were stopped in time were slowly able to resume there flight.

"There power to deceive...is there greatest strength."

"They are who they are...a vessel...nothing more, nothing less."

"As time goes on...and the more you impact that one's life, good or bad. They will slowly begin to forget their past life, and slowly embrace who they are in this world. This is the way." he boomed as I felt a sudden weight lifted off of me as time continued.

I stared off where that sheriff was last standing, but all that remained was just untouched snow in this graveyard.

For a second I did not know what to do, I just sat down in front of Victorya's grave for hours until closing time.

When I left I took shelter in the nearest park and placed myself under a tree, I dug into my pouch feeling around in it until I found what I was looking for.

That bottle of vodka that was supposed to be for me and Victorya, unopened and unknown to her. I uncorked the bottle as I smelt it, the smell was horrible but I still began to chug it as the night slowly began to continue.

The alcohol disinfected the sadness and anger in my heart as I tucked my sweater around my mouth as I huddled against a tree, I was sleeping outside but luckily it was not a cold night.

Or maybe the alcohol made my body warmer, I didn't care if I got mauled or frozen to death. It just seemed like a quicker way to be with Victorya.

I could feel my cheeks get red as I rested my head lightly against the tree bark, for the first time in a while that was one of the only times I have gotten a good rest.