Operation: Flanks for nothing.
The week after that, Beachhead is in the mess-tent when Roadblock heads toward him. "Flint wants you at the heli-pad in ten minutes to greet the new meat."
Beachhead scowls for a second, but nods and sends him off. Once outside, he goes over the roster. "West, Burton, Morales, Douglas, Ta...Taputapu? Wut sorta cockamamie name is that?" He asks outloud while twisting the paper around, causing one of the greenshirts to respond.
"You don't like it, you can eat my f'in shorts."
"...What da hell was dat yuh said, dirtbag?!" Beachhead yelled, and watches a dark-skinned man from the third row step up.
"You heard me; E-5 Dave Taputapu." The greenshirt says to him. "And i heard enough smartassin' about it in Chicago; no way in hell I'm taking it here!"
Beachhead scowls again, noting all the misery his name caused, before speaking. "Wut nationality is Taputapu?"
"I'm Samoan; but born in Chicago, Illinois."
"...Ah'rait; maybe ah misspoke jes' naw. But wait till yuh commandeh ain't tawlkin n' use propeh channels, next taim." He says before getting his walkie-talkie. "Flint, got anyone who ain't busy?" He asks, only to hear shouting to his right. He looks over to see a H.A.V.O.C. ramming a remote controlled ASP and getting stuck. "Neveh mind." He says as he watches Stratton exit the cabin while Cross-Country jumps off and start cussing at him after inspecting the damage. Beachhead starts to go over, only for Dusty to show up.
"Sorry to bother you, but we just got a fax from HQ for "your eyes only"."
In the agent's car, Lady-Jaye glances in the side mirror a bit before turning to the driver. "I was waiting for the part where you ask for my affiliation, madam." He says in a calm enough tone for having a sidearm poking into his side.
"MI6 wouldn't have sent anyone to the states without us being aware of it." She replies, keeping her face forward so the other three don't notice. "DIS...KGB?"
"Oh, I am thoroughly British, i assure you." He tells her, and switches accents. "Unless i be ordered otherwise, lassy."
Lady-Jaye almost turns her head as she recognizes it. "That was you back then; you're Beamish?!"
"Indeed i was. We are grateful for your aiding us in recovering Excalibur."
"Don't mention it. Just who is "we", exactly?"
"All i am authorized to say is that the department's name is an acronym."
While Flint and Cross-Country are leading the snakes away, the other two are following Burke, with only the latter aware that two other Joes have just passed the Idaho state line on the way back to base. "Well that was easy." The passenger says. "And you thought we were being followed." He added, only to get handed a piece of paper.
Only because something always goes bad each time we pair up.
"You-you better not be saying it's my fault." Duke tells Snake-Eyes. "I warned you about those Hyenas, and we got away from that holographic snake without a scratch, didn't we?"
There were two of those, weren't there?
"Fine, two, whatever...Don't pass notes when you're supposed to be watching the road!"
Back with the other two, they arrive at the motel. "I'm surprised you didn't try chatting with that girl, Dial-Tone." Lady-Jaye says as they leave the lobby.
He looks back and grins. "You remember those celebrities you were held with; one of 'em has a cousin in the rheology field. You wouldn't believe the stuff she's working on."
"You can start with the heck rheology means." She tells him as the reach the door.
"Rheology is the study of semi-solid matter. Rubber, plastic, things like thaaa-" He explains right as he walks in to a room with no floor.
Lady-Jaye shouts to him before the hair on the back of her neck stand up, and ducks to see the clerk swing down from the roof, nearly planting a knee into her face. "Didn't really think it would be that easy, did you?" She says, and gets into a boxing stance.
"Yer gonna get way worse for letting me stay stuck on that wall, shit head." Zarana replies as the two trade blows until Lady-Jaye trips her up.
"How tight do you want the restraints this time?" She asks, only to hear a voice behind her.
"Hey up there, you better get your ass down here already or your pal's are going on a lead diet!"
Lady-Jaye looks back, giving Zarana time to toss some gravel at her and kick her in the ribs, sending her down the hole.
After the incident is over, Cross-Country is in the gym's TV room with Cover-Girl, Recondo, Tripwire, Alpine, and Low-Light. When the reporter gets to the big reveal, he's not pleased. "Say what? Ain't no way in hell Mr. shiny-slicky's gettin' away wit' that! Ah'mah goin' over there ta peel dat limey* ta bits!" He shouts aloud as the latter two hold him back.
Chapter nineteen.
*No offense to any of the British people.