Stargazing – Kaoru Hitachiin

SuicidalConnorMurphy

A/N: Male!reader. High school AU.

Words: 2,517

A contented sigh tumbled from your lips as you gazed up at the clear night sky. Stars had only just begun to decorate the field of midnight blue, allowing you to count each and every new appearance. Winter had faded, making way for spring to approach, so the nights were slowly but surely growing warmer and more pleasant.

It wasn't too late- with winter came earlier sunsets and longer nights- but you felt as though time stood still as you sat on a swing in the park. Your eyes were closed, your head tilted up towards the sky. Your arms were limp by your sides, your feet softly dragging the ground beneath you. Everything was calm, serene, peaceful.

In the silence of the night, you could hear footsteps slowly approaching, and your heartbeat quickened. You froze in place, prepared for an attacker to attempt abduction. The footsteps drew closer until you were certain they were just to your left, and you braced yourself for a quick escape.

Until a soft sigh was heard, and the chains of the swing beside you squeaked softly in protest of being strained.

Opening one eye, you glanced to your left, stifling a gasp in surprise at the sight that met you. Sitting on the swing was one Kaoru Hitachiin, spoiled rich kid and Ouran Academy heartthrob. Looking at him fully, you couldn't help but tilt your head and wonder what business he had sitting in the park at night, without his escort or his guard or even his twin brother.

"Hitachiin?" you called gently. No one called the upperclassmen by first name, as much as you wanted to. "Kaoru" was such an adorable name, and it wasn't as though the rich students tried to hide their identities. It was just a sign of respect, referring to them by their surnames until you were granted exclusive permission to call them something more intimate.

The orange-haired boy opened his eyes and turned to meet your gaze. To your surprise, he offered you a lazy smile. This soft side of the younger Hitachiin twin puzzled you – he was normally loud, flamboyant, giggly, friendly. He wasn't a jerk like the other rich kids, and he was definitely the kinder of the twins.

"Hey, (l/n)," he greeted. A shiver snaked its way down your spine at the sound of his voice calling your name, and despite sharing nearly all of your classes with him, you felt a twinge of surprise that he knew who you were.

"What, uh… What are you doing out here?" you couldn't help but inquire. From what you understood, the rich kids had a strict schedule to keep, usually set in stone by their parents. You didn't know any of them on a personal enough level to understand the details, but what little you had been made privy to was enough to have you appreciating your humble background. Many of the upperclassmen, especially the kind ones like Hitachiin and Suoh, only made friends through their money. Other students abused their connections, and once their parties were over and their requirements were met, they never spoke to their so-called "friends" again.

Hitachiin chuckled softly, as though the answer were obvious. "Enjoying the stars."

You were hesitant to question further. A million thoughts swirled through your head, but you felt as though you had no right to voice them. Though, you supposed, he could always leave if he was uncomfortable or offended by your curiosity.

"I can see that," you countered. "I just meant-"

"What's a spoiled trust fund kid doing out past curfew, sitting in the park without an escort?" he finished for you, and you were grateful for the darkness and its ability to hide the blush crawling up your neck.

"Uh… yeah."

He chuckled again, his gaze turning up to the sky. You couldn't help but follow suit.

"My parents don't know I'm out here," he murmured softly, as though it were a secret – which it probably was. "My brother doesn't even know. I wait until everyone in the house is asleep; Hikaru, our parents, our bodyguards, the maids. Then I come out here to look at the stars."

"Why?" you asked before you could stop yourself.

He turned his eyes back towards you again, and you felt yourself growing weak the longer you looked into them. "It's peaceful. I don't have to be Mr. Hitachiin out here. I don't have to be Hikaru's brother, or the heir to the Hitachiin business, or the upperclassman that everyone only wants to befriend because he has money."

Your heart ached with sympathy. "I'm sorry you have to endure that," you murmured. "I don't know what it's like, obviously, but… If you ever need to talk about anything…"

You trailed off, dropping your gaze to your lap. What would the attractive Kaoru Hitachiin want to talk to you for, anyway?"

His swing squealed as he rose to his feet, and you tried to hide a wince. You'd scared him away. Your once chance at getting to know who he really was, and you'd ruined it.

A hand entered your peripheral vision, and you turned your head to view it fully. Hitachiin stood beside you, arm extended, palm open, a soft smile on his lips. You hesitantly placed your hand in his, noting with butterflies dancing through your core how warm it was. As you stood, you hesitantly met his eyes, catching the way they sparkled despite the lack of light around you.

"I should go," he whispered. "I try not to venture out for too long. Hikaru can sense when I'm gone."

You nodded dumbly, hanging onto his every word. "I'm sorry if I said anything out of line-"

He held up a hand, and you closed your mouth. "You said nothing wrong, (l/n). I was actually thinking… Maybe I could see you again? Tomorrow night, same time?"

Your heart nearly broke out of your chest, and you offered another nod. "Y-yeah. That sounds great."

He grinned. "Awesome. I'll see you tomorrow, then."

"See you tomorrow," you managed before he turned on his heel and took off away from the park.

The following night, you waited patiently at the park, sitting in the same swing you had before. You chewed your lip absent-mindedly as you gazed up at the stars, hoping against all hope that Hitachiin would really come back.

You heard footsteps behind you and, unable to contain your excitement, you turned around to face your companion. You saw him approaching and stood from your swing, waiting for him to get close enough for you to greet him.

"Hey, (l/n)," he beamed.

"Hey, Hitachiin," you returned.

He approached the swings, but instead of sitting down, you reached for his hand. Confused, he offered his own, and you ignored the tingle that spread through your limbs as your fingers brushed his.

"How about we sit on the field?" you suggested. "It has a better view of the stars."

He grinned and nodded his approval, letting you lead him across the park to the large field that families often used for kite flying or frisbee throwing. You sat down, crossing your legs and gently tugging him to follow suit. He complied, instead stretching his legs out before him, sitting much closer to you than you had anticipated.

"You're right," he purred softly. "This is much nicer."

You gulped softly, nodding before turning to gaze up at him. "So I-I didn't offend you yesterday, right?"

He shook his head. "Not at all. It was actually kind of nice to talk to someone who wanted to know the real me, not the rich Hitachiin offspring."

"I've never cared much for money," you shrugged. "It doesn't make a person."

He smiled softly. "What's your story, then? I've seen you around, you know, hanging out with Haruhi."

You stared at him with wide eyes, wondering how he knew your best friend and how Haruhi could have not mentioned that she and the cutest boy in school were on a first-name basis.

"Haruhi?" you repeated. "Yeah, I've known her since grade school. We kind of grew up together."

There was a glimmer of sadness in the taller boy's eyes. "That sounds nice."

"Do you not have… childhood friends?" you asked, wincing at how harsh your words sounded.

Hitachiin didn't seem to notice as he shook his head. "The only person I've grown up with is Hikaru. Our mom was… strict, regarding our day-to-day lives. We didn't even have casual friends – still don't."

"That's awful," you murmured.

He was quiet, and you took a moment to admire him. His soft eyes were blurred with a mix of emotions, his strong jawline seemed tight as though he were biting his tongue.

"If you'd like," you began softly, shyly glancing down at your lap, "I could be your friend."

He turned to look at you, frowning when you wouldn't meet his eyes. His soft hand grasped your chin, tilting your head up to look at him. You resisted biting your lip as you stared at the intensity in his golden eyes.

"I'd love that," he breathed.

After what felt like hours, it was time for him to return home. You were reluctant to see him go, but you needed to leave as well, and you didn't want either of you getting in trouble.

"Same time tomorrow, (l/n)?" he called over his shoulder.

"Yeah," you agreed. "But maybe you could call me (y/n), instead."

He stopped and turned around, the shyest hint of a smile on his lips. He offered you a mock bow, grinning on the way back up. "Only if you call me Kaoru."

Your heart hammered in your chest. "Deal!"

You parted ways, more excited than you expected for the next night to come.

Your rendezvous continued on like this for the next week. After dark, you would meet in the park, you always arriving first. You'd sit with Kaoru, still unable to believe that you were on a first-name basis, either on the swings or on a bench or in the field. You'd watch the stars and discuss whatever topic came to mind, neither of you shy or offended or guarded.

It was perfect.

You made your way to the park one night, surprised to see a mop of orange hair already awaiting you. Kaoru was seated on the field, which had become his favorite place to think. You sauntered up beside him, dropping to the ground in a cross-legged position.

"Mind if I join you?" you inquired.

He turned to grin at your arrival. "Not at all."

"What should we talk about tonight?" you prompted, allowing him the choice since it was usually you that began your nightly conversations.

He was hesitant to reply, and you worried that something might be wrong. Before you could question it, however, Kaoru turned to face you.

"Did you and Haruhi ever date?"

You blinked, processing the question before huffing out a soft laugh. He seemed stifled by your amusement.

"No, we never did," you assured him, shaking your head. "Why do you ask?"

"Hikaru has been… interested," Kaoru replied slowly. "He's also been pushing me to find out if she's available, and I knew that you two were close, so I didn't want to overstep my bounds by asking if she was single, if the two of you were together."

"She's single, but no offense to your brother, I don't know if she'd be interested," you countered. "She's kind of picky with who she's attracted to, and she hasn't had a crush on very many people in the years I've known her."

"Is that why you two never…?" Kaoru trailed off, knowing that you would understand.

You were hesitant to reply. "That, and…" You exhaled a sigh, turning away from the taller boy. "She's not my type."

"Oh?" Kaoru's interest had been piqued. "What is your type then, (y/n)?"

Chewing your lip, you swallowed the lump in your throat. "First and foremost… Male."

The boy beside you exhaled, and your hopeful heart could have sworn it was a sigh of relief. You hesitantly turned your head to glance at him, and found him fiddling with his sleeves.

"I was kind of hoping you'd say that," he murmured.

Your heart skipped a beat. "And why's that?"

He shifted closer to you, one hand coming to caress your jaw. You leaned into his touch, never breaking his gaze.

"Because my type is male, shorter than me, (h/c) hair and (e/c) eyes. He's funny, and smart, and sweet, and real, and he doesn't just want to get to know me for my money or my background. He's genuinely interested in who I am, and I've spent every night this week looking at the stars with him by my side."

"Kaoru…"

"Please tell me I'm not reading too much into this," he murmured, almost desperately. "I've been dying to talk to you, (y/n), but I didn't think you'd be interested, and I was afraid of being taken advantage of again."

"Kaoru, you're not reading too much into it," you assured him, and his soft eyes lit up hopefully. "You're my type, too."

He leaned in, his nose brushing against yours, so close that you could feel his breath ghosting over your mouth.

"Can I kiss you?" he murmured, and it took every ounce of willpower you had not to lunge forward and tackle him to the ground.

"Please," you exhaled, and he took the plunge, kissing you softly and passionately all at once. His hand slid to the back of your head, holding you in place. The hand he'd been using to prop himself up came to rest on your hip, gently fisting in the fabric of your shirt. You rested both of your hands on his chest, feeling his smooth, toned build through his clothing. He tilted his head, kissing you deeper and running his soft tongue along your bottom lip. With a gasp, you granted him access, melting into his arms when his tongue slipped into your mouth. It danced with your own, swiping along the roof of your mouth and the back of your teeth.

Growing lightheaded from the lack of air and the intensity of the kiss, you reluctantly pulled back to inhale. Your eyes fluttered open, gazing up at Kaoru.

"Will you be my boyfriend, (y/n)?" he murmured. "We'd have to keep it a secret, until I graduate and my parents no longer control me. They don't approve of anyone who doesn't come from money, and I don't want them to judge you. I care for you so much, (y/n)."

You silenced his ramblings with a soft kiss. "Of course I will, Kaoru. I wouldn't have kissed you if I didn't want this. I don't mind keeping it a secret. We can keep meeting up like this, away from your family's watch."

He nodded. "That sounds amazing."

He kissed you again, and you lost yourself to his touch. You didn't know how long you'd spent in the park this time, but neither of you could find it in yourselves to care.