The Month Peter Parker Learned Humility
Chapter 19: Wednesday September 19th
Peter, lying down in a strange bed, starts to wake up in a white room with a small coffee table to his right. "Hello, Peter. You're finally awake after a long resting period", calmly informs a smooth, non-binary voice. "…Please tell me I'm not in a Supers hospital or some kind of weird ER room", Peter groggily replies. "You are currently in the Baxter Building's bio-healing quarters." "Damnit. Lemme guess, all the Avengers are gonna come in and try to make me one of them again."
"How can such a smart kid end up in a place like this?", asks a bodiless voice; a voice that sounds all too flexible and familiar. "Reed?" "Yeah, and I brought some friends along with me. Real friends, no suits." "Hiya, Tiger", MJ butts in, holding a plate of wheat cakes. "Wheat cakes! Nice, I'll eat that cake of yours!" "What?" "…I'm still just getting up." "Tiger, ever since I came back to Queens, there's a lot that changed, especially with you." "I don't know if now's the best time for that, there's some things we need to dis—" "Reed, let us talk to him", interrupts May, bringing in an extra chair for herself. "I thought you were gonna wait until—" "Not this time. I know what she's gonna say to him." "Well, it's time to go check on my experiments now."
"MJ, May, wha's going on?" "…It's a lot in such a short time. I had to deal with 4 legit super villains who have no problems with murder, two of them personally tried to kill me personally! Peter, when should a girl have an alien slime become you and use her body to kill her boyfriend?!" "When, Peter Benjamin Parker?!" "None?", he nervously states, with a mouthful of pancakes. "YA DAMN RIGHT YOU NEVER DO THAT!" "Look, I don't like almost dying and being possessed. I hate it, I hate it beyond comprehension. It's the worst feeling anyone can ever go through, and I would never go through it if I haven't met you."
"Are,... Are you breaking up with me, MJ?", stutters a very confused Peter. "Take a minute to listen, please. That's why May whipped up the wheat cakes." "Alright, I'll shut up and let you finish", he replies, still chewing on his homemade breakfast. "What are trying to say to me?" "Peter, I, I..." MJ freezes mid sentence, contemplating exactly what her next words will be to the man she's loved since he was a boy. "MJ, you ARE breaking up with me!", shouts Peter, with May starting to comfort her baby boy. "It's all because of these damn powers! They took away Ben, Gwen, Uncle Norman, Harry,-" "Tiger, it's not that at all!" "Wait, what?!", the Parkers reply in unison. "Mary Jane, you told me this was the 'we're no longer boyfriend and girlfriend' trip. Just what kind of games do you think you can play with my Peter, after all these years of friendship and acceptance we gave you on top of thirds and fourths-"
"I'm not finished. I can't be your girlfriend, and that's true. That's no longer an option. I know what is an option, though." "W-wha-ya know what, just tell me. I don't understand any of this AT ALL." "If I can't be your girlfriend, I gotta upgrade to ya forever and ever lover! The silk to your spider's web, the spinneret in those genius shooters on ya wrists!" "... So, you're not gonna make him cry like he did in July over Gwen?" "May, c'mon!", Peter bashfully berates in such a short sentence. "Sorry, my Aunt Senses were tingling." As Pete's face flushes with embarrassment, MJ giggles at the corny joke.
"Tiger, I can't let Spider-Man mope around Midtown if you did everything to make me feel just as special as you; albeit some goo got in the fucking way." "Language! You're still not 18 yet, little lady." "But you get the idea, Pete. If I'm gonna love and support Peter Parker, I gotta give Spider-Man the same treatment. Just give me some shooters of my own for emergencies, since I'm never gonna get the suit at this rate.-"W-well, that's something you can blame Reed on-" "AND teach me how to make my own webbing; I kinda forgot how from when you told me way back when."
"Peter Benjamin Parker, say yes. I know Ben would've told you to", May whispers into Peter's ear. "Where else are you gonna find a girl like this?" "Well, this is a lot to handle all at once." "It's almost like finding out your loved one's a superhero!", sarcastically replies MJ, starting to get impatient with Peter's indecisiveness. "Are you gonna—" "Yes. Yes, let's swing around New York together, Spinerette!" "Spinerette…?" "Yeah, that's your swinging name. You said it yourself, MJ."
"Yeah, I did. Just like I said I'd eat you if I couldn't swing with you", MJ adds, this time with a much deeper, monstrous voice with her face immediately morphing into Venom's. "You got any room for party crashers, Shark Week?", asks Harry Osborn, still in his prison jumpsuit. "W-w-What?", stutters Peter. "No no no no no, this isn't real!" "Wanna bet, Bug Boy?", bellows Norman Osborn, fully garbed in the Green Goblin's mask, purple unitard and satchel from behind Peter's bed. Sandman reveals himself to be the coffee table, guffawing at Spider-Man's absolute terror.
A horribly disfigured hand missing some fingers reaches from underneath the bed, pulling Peter out and gave him a mirror amidst the evil laughs. The Chameleon's devious grin became Peter's reflection, now cackling like a drunk hyena at Pete's extreme confusion. The broken hand turned into an arm, and that turned into the torso and full body of Kraven, The Hunter, putting a shotgun barrel on his forehead. As the maniacal cacklings and guffaws of Peter's old enemies flood the room, the mirror handle stretched and thickened as it formed a tentacle; a perfect device to choke out Spider-Man. "I'll be back, sooner than you'll ever expect", it coldly claimed, tightening its grip on Peter's windpipe. "It's all according to my master plan."
"NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!", shrieked Peter, fending off a non-existent threat. "No! No more! You're dead or in jail, each and every one of you! You can't hurt me, you can't hurt anyone!", he ranted on, not realizing he's on May's couch and scaring everyone. "You can't hurt,... You,... Wait, why am I back home? Where's Venom, and Harry? Sandman? Norman?! Otto?! Where are they?!"
"Peter, calm down, take a VERY deep breath, ok?", replies Reed, rushing in through the kitchen table. "You're home now. No one's gonna hurt you here. You're safe here", May adds, holding her boy tight. "May, Reed; did I win? Did I get rid of Venom?" "You and MJ did, it's already in a rigged containment can. It won't get anyone now, I'm 100% positive of that." "Where is it? Tell me it's not back in the-" "It's not back in the Baxter Building, but I'm legally not allowed to tell you where it really is", Reed chimed in, already prepared. "So we're safe? Everyone's safe?" "YES, Pete. Me and MJ are gonna be fine. We're gonna be okay", May replies, giving Peter a cup of orange juice.
"Now get dressed and brush your teeth. I made you a bread sandwich, since Flash's mom wasn't kidding about us paying his med bills. Lunch's on the counter, and try to swing extra fast, if you can time it or if your little Spider's Sense does it for you. Or do you, I'm not sure honestly? How do ya time it-" "May! What time is it?", Peter interrupts, covering Reed's mouth before he makes another Adventure Time joke.
"It'ssssss 8am on the dot, better get a move on! Ya got like 20 minutes before where you should be THE WHOLE DAY. No patrolling, I want you to rest those wounds." " Fine, I'll come straight home", Peter begrudgingly agrees. "Hold up, I got an idea. Did Johnny ever give you a joyride in the Fantasicar?"
8:15am, Midtown High School entrance.
"Reed, I owe ya one for this! But how are you gonna handle-" "Me and the principal go back. I was his dad's tutor way before I borrowed that space shuttle without permission", he calmly replies, strutting into the front office. "Plus, what problem can't Mr Fantastic fix? Now go to class, someone's probably expecting you there." An anxious Peter runs off to his first period class, still hoping his lucid nightmare doesn't become a firm reality.
"Hey, did I miss anything?", Peter asked, sliding quietly into his desk next to Randy and MJ. "Bro, class hasn't even started yet. Yo got your copy of the group essay outline?", Randy replies. "…Shit. That's either in this bag orrrrr nope it's on my bed because I'm a genius who's always responsible with his life!" "Of course. Ya too busy swinging around the city and fucking super-villains to do your report?" "YA WHAT?", Peter and MJ both yell-whisper.
"C'mon, man, Dad taught me all his reporter tricks so I could be a Bugle boy just like him. I seen how you hold back in PE, you of all people just happened to get kidnapped by a super villain, who looks like a thick female version of Spider-Man's dark edge lord suit which was worn THE EXACT SAME TIME you were being a huge dick, and MJ was coincidentally absent the day that thick ass villain showed up. My nigga, are you even trying to hide this shit?"
"…It was that tight on me?", asks MJ. "Yeah. I know that fine ass anywhere." "What'd you mean 'that fine ass'?" "I look, but never touch out of respect." "Thank you…?" "Thank you, but please stop. Unless it's right in your face, just don't", MJ replies. "If you say so. Anyway, you left it in your bed?"
"You three care to share your discussion with the rest of the class? It seems so riveting since you haven't stopped during my role call", interrupts Mr Bagley. "Just uh, just making Peter has a clear understanding on the project, sir." As Mr Bagley's role call turns into his lesson plan, Peter leans into Randy's ear. "You can't tell anyone, no matter what happens to any of us. Only the other supers know, and that's how it's gonna stay", he whispered. "Like I'm gonna tell anyone, Dad also taught me about NDAs", he sarcastically replied.
3:30pm, The DBTV Editor's Floor.
"You're fired, Brock! How many times do I have to shout it so it goes through ya damn head?!", hollers Betty Brant. "I can't be fired, Betty! Who got you the scoop on Ant-Man's domestic abuse, huh?" "Reed Richards. He dropped that info to me PERSONALLY two days ago." "Well,… I have better info, ya know." "So you not only embarrass us on camera, right after Jonah's passing, but now you're reading my mail as well?" "I, I uhh, I can explain. You see, it was in my mailbox, and—" "You're only giving me more reasons to kick your sorry ass outta here!"
"I did what I had to do to get that story!" "You got us footage of a fight other people IN THE FIELD got better footage of. Get out before I throw you out the window." "You're a LIAR, Brant! A LIAR!" "Hey, Ben, you said that a Mr Cage would be talking with you today in office, right?", Brant politely yet firmly asked through her intercom phone. "Yep, he's grabbing a cup of coffee real quick before we start", Ben replies. "Cool, send him over here before you two get started, please." "Yeah, sure." "Thank you!"
"…Please tell me Mr Cage isn't a hero for hire." "Oh, he is, smart ass. Better sprint out or get powered out, man." "…We'll see how the New York Bulletin reacts to how I've been treated by a control freak like you! We'll see, you'll see, you'll all see!", Brock hollers as he storms out of her office, swinging his arms around like a wild monkey before Luke Cage throws him into the elevator.
END OF CHAPTER 19