* 1-28 Just fixing a few typos and such, nothing new has been added.
Thank you to Athlete Girl, who helped me decide what needed to be added to this chapter to make it ready to publish. You'll be happy to know it was running long, so I chopped off a good amount so now I have a good start on the next chapter. I was so excited to post it I forgot to add any notes! Please let me know if you are still following! A review would be nice, but you can PM me too! Thank you for all the great reviews on the last chapter, they really are appreciated!
Nunchi (n) the ability to gauge the mood of others,
Read the atmosphere, and react appropriately.
Or
"I tell myself that I am not afraid"
-Piglet
Chapter 22 - Nunchi
They made an almost perfect getaway from the meadow that had been the cause of so much anxiety. 1:30 in the morning found Merle, Beth and Carl pushing the truck across the field. Merle at the open door on the drivers side, whispering directions. "More to the left...no, Ya' other left. Okay go towards ya' gun hand now." to Dexy who was in the driver's seat his small hands wrapped around the steering wheel.
Each snap of dry twig or branch under the tires only made them push harder and faster to get to what passed for a road. Merle had felt safe enough to risk the noise of starting the engine, speeding away as fast as they dare to go once they reached the rutted dirt road. When the tires got to blacktop he pushed the pedal to the floor in an attempt to get as far away as fast as he could.
They drove until it was light, only stopping for bathroom breaks and to fill the tank, they just kept going until they were ready to stop for the night. Beth didn't relax until the miles and hours lengthened substantially between them and whoever it was that had been watching them.
With the long drive and the "adults" on edge Dexy and Judith were both getting cranky and had started to whine, something that Merle had no patience for. When they passed through yet another small town they were fortunate enough to find a small house on the outskirts in reasonably good shape. Merle pulled the truck around the back, then he and Carl checked the house to make sure it was safe for Beth to bring the kids in. Despite having no water or electricity, there was a large potbelly stove, four sturdy walls and three soft beds to stretch out in and that made it just about perfect.
It was obvious that the owners had made a hasty departure because there was a trail of clothing and baby toys leading from the back bedrooms to the front door. There was a pile of discarded items stacked just inside the front door that they either hadn't been able to fit into their car, or had been deemed unnecessary to their immediate survival. So when Merle took Carl and Dexy out to check the property, Beth and Judith went through the pile and the rest of the house to see if there was anything left that worth taking with them.
When they got back, Merle pulled out his flint from his bag and gave a lesson on how to start a fire. "Ain't always gunna be lucky enough to have matches or a lighter, ya' gunna need to know other ways to get a fire goin' in an emergency." He told them. "Better to learn now when ya' not stressed and got the time. But you can use sticks...rubbin' them together, it's hard but it can be done. Ya' can also use the lens of a magnifying glass or even from a pair ah' glasses." Once he had started a small fire he allowed Carl to transfer it into the stove. Beth started looking for something to make for their dinner while he took the kids outside to practice hitting the flint with the striker, Carl managed to get close a few times. The smaller kids were happy when they were able to make a small spark.
After they ate, they hung blankets in front of the windows so they could hide the light from of the fire from anyone (dead or alive). By 6:30 the kids had full bellies and were warm and cozy and tucked into bed. Merle and Beth were both too tired to take advantage of the child free time, instead they reclined tiredly on the couch, their arms occasionally brushing. Eventually Merle got up and walked to one of the bags, pulling out a bottle of whiskey. "After the day we've hade, I think we both could do with a nightcap." he said as he opened a cabinet door and pulled out a dusty jelly glass, wiping it clean with the hem of his shirt before pouring a shot.
He slugged it down and gave a sigh of pleasure, then he measured out a second shot before he placed the bottle back in his bag. He returned to the couch and sat down heavily, putting the glass into Beths hand. She amusedly considered the amber liquid in the jelly jar, her Grandma had a full set just like it. Remembering the summer she, Shawn, and Maggie had to eat a lot of peanut butter and grape jelly sandwiches so their Grandma could have a full set.
Leaning forward she put the untouched shot of whiskey on the coffee table in front of her. "We need to talk." She told him, her eyes and voice were sober, and suddenly Merle found himself wishing he wasn't.
"No good conversation has ever started that way, ain't gunna like this am I?" He asked her in a resigned voice.
"No, I don't think you will." Beth affirmed as she turned her body towards him pulling her feet up and under her. She waited until he looked over at her, before asking him, "I'd like you to hear me out, then if you have any questions I'll answer them for you, okay?"
Merle held up one finger to stop her, then leaned forward and snagged the jelly glass, and sucked down her neglected whiskey.
Beth face was filled with concern, but waited until he sat the glass down and turned to look at her. Taking a deep calming breath, she began slowly. "I can't be sure how deep the damage that Joe and the Claimers caused Dexy. Len and Dan, they were both sick...perverted...they had no redeeming qualities. But Joe, in some ways Joe was worse, because he pretended to care for him...to love him. Joe wouldn't let the others do what they wanted, but we always understood that he could change his mind at anytime. He protected us, there was always the threat that he would hand us over if he deemed it necessary." Pausing, Beth seemed to consider her words.
"It's important that you understand that Joe controlled everyone in the group to an extent. And while Len and Dan didn't always agree with him, he had some sort of strange hold over them. Len and Dan were evil, but even they were afraid of Joe. And in Joe's eyes we belonged to him, and him alone. We were expected to fall into line. If we messed up, if we weren't "authentic" or "sincere" enough, or if we didn't show our appreciation for everything that he did for us he would make us pay for it. The same went if we did something that made him acknowledge that we weren't his perfect little family." Beth closed her eyes, and continued, her voice, unemotional. "He learned very early on that he could control me through Dexy. You don't know what it was like watching Joe punished him for something I did." Her eyes were showing the emotions that her voice was not, tearing up she shut them shaking her head.
"Yes. Yes I do." Merle told her with regret, thinking of his Pops.
When she opened her eyes, Merle was once again stuck by the vivid blue of them. "Joe had this whole story about us in his head. What he was to us and what we were to him. It was so elaborate, it wasn't long before I was sure that he believed his own lies, that somewhere along the line they became his truth. We were his family, and in his eyes he was our loving, but strict patriarch. I made Dexy follow his rules, made him say them over and over until he stopped questioning them." Beth made a frustrated sound. "I'm messing this up! Let me start over...go further back. College is where it started, I had this fantastic professor, he became my mentor. He and his wife and their perfect baby, they became family to me…" She started off slowly.
Merle quickly interrupted. "An Dexy is their son...yeah I know."
Beth inhaled sharply, "How? How did you know? When did you know!?"
"You told me...the day in the garage in the Walsh house. Remember, ya' was upset that you couldn't find the Bible with the picture. Said you wanted to be able to give Dexy his parents back."
Beth's face was shocked. "I didn't even realize...how did I not realize? Yes, I remember now, you said we could try to go to their house and look for photos if it was safe."
Merle nodded in agreement. "You were so upset, that's why probably why ya' didn't realize you had let it slip. But honestly, I already knew by then." At Beths questioning look, he added. "Dexy told me about a week or so before that. Asked if he had to call me Daddy like he had to call Joe…"like he had to call Bethie Mama."
"Why didn't you say something?" She wanted to know, her voice sounded confused.
He reached out and tangled his hand into the hair at the nape of her neck, gently pulling her onto his lap. He put his forehead against hers. "Truth is I was kinda mad at first, but it only took a few minutes before I realized that in the long run it really didn't matter. Was too late, I already cared too much for the both of ya'. I admired how ya' protect the boy. Ya' the one taking care of that boy, making sure he makes it from day to day. Ya' feed him, keep him warm and safe, make sure he goes to sleep with a full belly, tell him that ya' love him. As far as I'm concerned you are his Mama now." His voice was gruff but sincere.
Beth pulled her forehead back from his so she could look into his eyes. "You need to understand how insistent Joe was that Dexy call me Mama and him Daddy, when he forgot Joe would get so angry." She pressed her hands over her sternum, like she had a bellyache. "It was like I was watching Joe teeter on the edge of insanity. And I knew if he fell he was going to take us over with him." Her voice cracked. "Dexy's safety was my main priority, and if that meant that he needed to think of me as his mother, than that was what he had to do. By the point we met you he had been conditioned so thoroughly that he never even called me by my name even when we were alone anymore. I had already decided that when we got away, I wasn't going to make him change back. I was afraid it would only cause him more harm than good."
She proceeded to tell him the whole story, about babysitting so far from everyone she loved...about how they came to meet Joe and the Claimers, about Billy and the other girl, she held nothing back, telling him everything that happened in the time they were with the Claimers. She talked for hours, Merle occasionally asking her questions, but he mainly just listened until she was all talked out.
"Well, I'm real sorry about what happened to you and Dex, darlin'. Ya' gotta know I'd never fault you for doing what was needed to keep the two ah'ya alive. Ya' one of the strongest women I know lotta people would've given up, but not you." He gave a deep sigh, and rolled his neck. " As long as we're bein' honest, I guess I need to tell ya' ah little more about myself, 'cause I left more than a little out."
"First off, I guess I should tell you about the drugs. Meth was my drug of choice when I could get it. But to be honest, I wasn't picky, if something was put in front of me, I took it. I'm a drug addict, a recovered one, but a drug addict nonetheless. I fight those cravings everyday...always will be. I probably drank too much, but I never had an issue going without...but because of my addictive personality, I keep an eye on that too."
Beth shifted uncomfortably on his lap, putting more space between them. He hated the distance, but he was happy that she had remained perched on his knee and seemed willing to listen to his story. "Go on." She urged. "Let's get it all out"
"I try to keep it to a three drink maximum when I do drink, I normally stick to beer but I do like my whiskey. Was in and out of juvie until I turned 18 then I went into to Army. I loved it, I was good at it...was made for that kinda life. I did really well for a short time, until I let my temper get the best of me. Then I ruined it just like I had ruined every good thing that ever came to me. "Self destructive" my therapist called it, just another Dixon trait is what I called it." Merle gave a dry humorous laugh. "Spent a long time in the brig...and after I was dishonorably discharged it wasn't too long before I was back in jail...and then prison."
He had been watching her face, and could see the disappointment in he expressive eyes. More than anything he wanted to fold her into his arms and lose himself in her, but he forced himself to be as brave has she had just been.
"Wasn't until my last stint in prison that I even tried to change. Met a great man named Frank, and he took an interest in me, signed me up for some classes. I didn't like them, but I sure learned a lot about myself, a lot of it I didn't like. My Pops, he was the worst kind ah' man, and I realized I was turning into him. Sometimes I would look in the mirror and I'd just see him smirking back at me. I hated it, hated what I was turnin' into. Was in the pen for sellin' drugs mostly, but there were petty crimes and fightin'. But I ain't ever hurt a child or a woman." He caressed her cheek with his calloused fingers. "I promise that ya' and the kids are safe with me, I'd cut off my own hand before I would ever raise against any of ya'."
Beth moved off of his knee and back into his lap, taking his whiskery cheeks between her hands. "Oh, Merle, don't you think that I already knew that? I trust you to look out for us. I trust you with Dexys life...trust that if something ever happened to me that you would take care of him." She sighed. "I think you're just about the best man I've ever known, if a bit rough around the edges. That being said, I also think it would be best if we not tell my daddy that you spent any time in prison." She smiled wryly. "At least until he accepts us...so at least for the first few years."
"Few years,huh? So ya' plan on keeping me around?" He asked her gruffly.
"You know how I am." She giggled. "It takes me a while to form a good working plan. Two years should be long enough for me to figure out our next step."
"And Jimmy? When we get to ya' Daddy's farm am I gunna have to worry about you having feelin's for some other man?" A hint of jealousy in his voice..
"Jimmy?" Beth asked, surprise clear in her voice.
"When we first met, you talked about him...thought he was Dexy's daddy." He admitted.
"No. Definitely not. Jimmy and I grew up together, we always liked each other, but only dated a few years in high school. What we had was puppy love...well, maybe it was more than that, he was to only boy I even considered being with until I went off to college. Whatever it was that was between us, it never made it past our teen's. The romantic feelings we had were gone even before high school ended, but we still considered ourselves friends. Last time I was home visiting from college, he was working on his family farm and dating a very nice girl that had been a few years behind us in school." She smoothed her hands back into his hair. "Even if he was there when we made it back to the farm I would never even look at him that way, not when I have my eyes already set on you."
"That right?" He asked, as a smug smile spread across his face. "Well that's good, I would hate to start off on the wrong foot with ya' old man, by having to kick Jimmy's ass as soon as we got there." He told her as he pushed her loose hair over her shoulders and pulled her snugly onto his lap. His lips were on hers, her arms going around his neck to pull him closer made him smile into their kiss.
"I'm going to go try my luck." Rick told Shane as he grabbed the fishing pole out of the bed of the truck. They had found a small farm with a good sized pond just past a barren paddock where they planed to stop for a night or two. Rick had been wondering out loud if the pond was stocked with catfish as soon as he saw it. Shane grunted acknowledgement as he pulled out the camp stove and the sleeping bags and headed back into the house.
Fresh fish would be nice, they were both getting a bit sick of rabbit, not that they would turn their noses up at any fresh meat. Even if Rick didn't manage to reel anything in they had plenty of canned food, a still untouched box of MREs and a gallon bag of freshly made jerky, it was delicious despite the fact that neither men could say with 100% certainty what animal the meat came from. What they were certain of was that it had been provided by the multi talented Mr. Dixon. They both decided that it would be smart to stretch out their supply for as long as possible by supplementing it with fresh food whenever they could. After being on the run with nothing but the clothes on their backs, they weren't going to waste the gift that had been handed to them by the Dixons.
It seemed as though Beth and her husband had thought about everything they might need and then went about getting it for them. Over the last few days of traveling the phrase "God bless the Dixon's!" Had been uttered dozens of times as they opened every new bag or box and found yet another amazing and useful thing stuffed inside.
Rick stood facing the pond, occasionally looking over his shoulder to the space between himself and the farmhouse where he could see Shane working at getting the house secure for the night. As he reeled in a second fish he examined the line of woods that lay in the distance past the pond and the farmland, and as fishermen tend to do he contemplated life as he cast his line.
He could admit that he could hold onto a grudge like a dog holds on to a bone. He had done his best to hide his anger and the hurt under the surface so that he and Lori could co-parent Carl, but it had been a struggle. Unfortunately it would come bubbling to the surface at inopportune times, thick and ugly like tar. For the first year after the divorce Carl had to be the go between. At first he thought it was only so he could avoid his ex-wife and his ex-best friend in order not to hurt his boy anymore, until he realized it was hurting Carl even more than he could've imagined...and it had almost ruined his son's relationship with his mother.
It took him too long to realize that not only had he lost Lori and Shane...but he was at least partly to blame for Carl losing them too. So despite his anger and hurt, he resolved to do his best to give his boy what he needed most, his mother back. It was only when he was able to let it go of his anger, that Carl was able to do the same. With time and work, he had begun spending small amounts of time in the Walsh home when dropping off or picking up Carl for visitation. But the thing was, that spending time around Judith still hurt, because all he could seem to think was "she should have been mine."
Shane had changed with his marriage to Lori, she had softened his hard edges. And Judith turned him into someone that Rick could relate to. Shane was devoted to his wife and daughter with a ferocity of a man who never expected to have the gift of a family. And Rick wondered if Lori had ever really loved him the way a wife is supposed to love a husband. And that maybe, just maybe Lori was always meant to be Shane's wife. And if it was his and Lori's marriage that had been the mistake. Except there was Carl...and how could their marriage have been a mistake when it had produced a kid like Carl?
The few weeks that he and Shane had been held in captivity had taught him a lot of things about what he could endure all in the name of staying alive so he could try to get back to his son. There wasn't much he wouldn't do for his kid...and he knew that the same could be said of Shane. The biggest lesson was never take people on face value, and if something seemed too good to be true...well it probably was. The group of men they had run into had offered food, but neglected to tell them that they were expected to work for every scrap given to them. And there was always work to be done, and not nearly enough food given in return. So by the end of the day they would be so exhausted and hungry that they couldn't find the energy to even talk through an escape plan.
The only good thing to come of that time was that it had somehow started to heal the jagged rift between the two men. In the end they didn't need a plan, the dead had overrun a warehouse they were working to clear out, when the men that had guns were busy fighting, the handful of men being held had managed to punch out a window in the room that they had been shoved into. Everyone had taken off in different directions, they had seen a man go down in the herd of dead, and one was shot in the back by one of the men that had been standing guard before he had cut and run himself.
The and Shane had run and kept going. Every once in awhile the would see men behind them in the distance. It could be a few of the men from the group hunting for them, other escapes or even the dead, it didn't matter as they weren't planning on letting them get close enough to find out. So they picked up the pace until they were sure they had lost them. And even though he slowed Shane down with his busted up ribs, Shane never left him, and Rick would never forget that.
The next day Merle, Beth and Carl took turns driving, by one o'clock they found themselves sitting inside the place that Daryl had worked at. Merle found what he thought was Daryl's bay. It was almost empty, it looked like someone had taken most of the items. But the placement of the items that had been left behind reminded him of how his PopPop had trained them.
The shop was small but it was in good shape, clean of blood and gore if not oil and grease. In fact the whole town seemed fairly untouched, if you overlooked the dead bodies that lay willy-nilly in gutters or sidewalks. Only a few of the still walking dead stumbling around, following the truck into the lot. Merle grabbed one of the smaller guns that he kept inside the truck. "Ya' got this?" He asked the Dexy, holding the gun out to him.
Dexy's eyes lit up. "Hell yeah!" He exclaimed, taking the gun out of Merle's hand.
"Dexy!" Beth exclaimed, before Merle cut her off. "Damn straight." Merle ruffled the hair on Dexys head affectionately. "That's my boy."
"Seriously Merle! When we get to the farm you will be the one taking the blame for his language." She told him.
"You think that bothers me?" He asked not taking his eyes off of Dexy as he got in his shooting stance.
"If you were wanting my Daddy to like you at all, then it should." She reminded him.
The first shot took off the ear of the closest walker, the second shot carved a line along the top of it's head. "Shit." Dexy muttered as he adjusted his stance and took a deep breath. The third shot dropped it, he aimed at the walker that was further away. This time carefully lining up his shot, taking the walker down down. Both Carl and Dexy gave whoops of joy as they high-fived.
"Boys." Judith said to nobody in particular, rolling her eyes.
"That's how ya' do it." Merle said giving Dexy a nod of approval as he took the gun from his hand and put it back in its place. "Next time ya' take that deep breath before ya' start shooting. Don't wanna waste ya' bullets if ya' can help it."
"Yes sir, breathe then shoot." Dexy promised.
Searching the building hadn't taken much time or energy. Once the shop was secured, Merle took Beth aside telling her, "Gunna leave ya' here while I go on up to the cabin."
Beth did something she rarely did, she flat out refused, And that caused an argument...or it would have been an argument if Beth wasn't as laid back as she was. "Enough." Beth finally growled as she pulled Merle into the parking lot by his arm, telling the kids to stay inside.
She closed the door and rounded on him, shaking her finger in his face. "Stop. Do you think I'm stupid?" She demanded, thrusting her finger into his chest.
"Don't know what the fuck ya' talkin' about." He said belligerently.
"Bullshit, you're trying to pick a fight so you can get in a huff and leave." She jabbed him harder. "Well, it's not going to work so you can just forget about it.
"Ouch. Woman, stop fuckin' pokin' at me." Merle growled, ill-temperedly pushing her finger to the side.
"You stop being an ass, and I'll stop poking you." She said let him know.
"Well shit, I'm gunna be black and blue if ya' poke me every time I'm an ass." He snapped somewhat peevishly.
She stepped closer, looking up into his eyes. "Fine...at least try to stop being an ass to me. I can see how antsy you're getting, and believe me I understand, I do. But, you and me we're a team, we have to have each other's backs. So no more temper tantrums...just talk to me."
"I'm worried he may be gone." He rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't think I'll take it well if he ain't there. I don' want the kids to see that." He told her honestly.
It broke her heart to think there was a chance that Merle wouldn't have his brother after all this. She reached over and took his hand in hers. "Your right, it could happen. The last thing I want is for you is to be alone if things don't go the way you want. I want to be there for you, just like you are going to want to be there for me when it's my turn." She dropped her hand, and poked him softly this time to emphasize her words. "We stick together, no onegets left behind."
She waited until he nodded. "But, I guess we can compromise. You take the bike, the kids and I will follow you in the truck." She smiled softly at him. "And that's the best offer you're going to get from me today."
'Fine." He groused. "But you are going to sit ya' ass at the end of the fuckin' driveway, while I check the cabin, I don't know if there is room to turn the truck and the trailer around, and I want you to be able to get out if ya' need to." He said firmly.
"Deal. Go on and get your bike unloaded, while I get everyone to pee before we go." Beth said as she turned around and walked to the door. "And wear your damn hamlet this time, I have enough to worry about without Dexy insisting he doesn't need to use one just because you don't."
"Girl, I'm a grown-ass man. I don't need you telling me what I can and can not do." Merle groused even as he went to grab his helmet before unloading his bike.
He had pulled the bike off the trailer and parked it next to the truck. Getting off he left the helmet on the seat and went back to folded the ramp back into the gate of the trailer. Instead of being frustrated at the amount of time it seemed to take the four of them to take a piss, he was happy to have the time to have a smoke while he walked off his nervous energy.
His reasoning for not wanting Beth and the kids with him was two fold. Yes, Daryl might be gone...one way or the other. But he could be there, and Daryl could be a squirrelly little fuck when backed into a corner. The boy was scrappy, and had a strong fight or flight reflex. He was hoping if Daryl was anywhere near the cabin, he would hear Merles bike. He was convinced that Daryl would know that was him and less likely to shoot first and ask questions later.
He smoked his cigarette while he stood facing in the direction he knew his brothers cabin should be. The chances that Baby Brother was dead were slim, but there was always that possibility. He had no doubt that Daryl was a born survivor, wasn't nothing that boy couldn't do. And while he would never underestimate him, Daryl was still just a man. There was no telling what he had already faced on his own, without his big brother at his back. Herds of the dead? Crazy ass psycho people? Sickness?
Shit happens, and life has a way of knocking you down when you least expect it. That was something he had known all his life.
Please, just please let him be there alive and well.
Still, the fact was that he was less worried about him being dead than just being gone. Daryl would have to have known that sooner or later his big brother would show up looking for him. He had always come back to Daryl...always. He was almost positive that Daryl would hunker down and wait for him to make his way there. He couldn't imagine any scenario where Daryl would ever trust the government enough to leave his mountain in favor of an overcrowded camp. His little brother would rather face all this shit on his own than be with other people packed like sardines in a can in one of those places.
He wondered to the next store, the back door was closed, but had been kicked in at some point, Merle nudged it open with the tip of his rifle. It appeared to mom and pop hardware store, by the looks of the storeroom, it had been cleaned out but good. Wasn't much left on the shelves that he could see, There were a few decomposing bodies lying inside, one was in front of the door. Using the tip of his gun he nudged it, and then used the steel toe of his biker boot to make its head roll towards him. He leaned down to get a better look, and felt a flood of relief at the telltale small circular wound between the dead man's eyes.
"Little Brother." He said proudly. "I knew ya' was goin'ta do just fine on ya' own." Hearing footsteps coming up behind him, and stood and turned to see Dexy hurrying past Carl as they came around the rear of the trailer. The little boy running full force and wrapping himself around Merles leg, raising his arms to be picked up. "Was you needing me to come help you clear the store? You got the bike down! I wanna ride with you...can I go with you?" Merle put his cigarette in between his lips and scooped the little boy up and onto his shoulder.
"No, not today Dexy-boy, to both ah' those questions. As soon as the girls are done I want to get goin', But maybe we can come back and take a look see some other time. And I want you in the truck today, I'll take you for a ride some other day."
He walked back over to the Suburban with Dexy's arms wrapped around his head, taking to Carl. "You sit up front with Beth, keep alert, have ya' gun out just in case, just like I tol' ya'...can never be too careful."
"Yes Sir. I'll be watching out for them, just like always." Carl told him.
He gave Carl an affectionate cuff on the side of the head as he climbed into the truck. "Good man." Opening the back door and lifted Dexy off his shoulders and put him in his car seat behind Carl.
"Why can't I go on the bike with you?" Dexy pouted.
"'Boy, what did I tell ya'?" Merle demanded harshly.
"You said no." If possible Dexy's lip stuck out even further. "I don't see why not, I want to help find Baby Brother too! And I can watch your back, you told me I was a better shot than most men, remember?"
"That ya' are, and I appreciate that ya' wanna help, but my answer is still the same. I'm goin' by myself, and I need ya' two boys to help ya' Mama and keep Judith safe." Merle stepped back to close the door. "I'm counting on you Dex, are ya' the man for this here job or ain't ya'?"
"Yes, I'm the man for the job. I'mma make you proud." Dexy told him as he threw his arms around his neck and hugged him tightly, pressing his chubby cheek against Merles weathered one. Merle held the little boy to him for a second, then guided him back to his seat. "Go on and buckle up, here comes ya' Mama.." He told the boy as Beth and Judith approached the truck.
He watched Dexy click himself into the seat, then shut the door and walked around where Beth was just shutting Judith's car door. "The road is pretty narrow and has some tight turns, so just gunna take it nice and slow. Should be there in a half hour to forty five minutes. I'll motion at the spot where I want you to wait...just before Daryl's driveway. If ya' hear shots or if anything don't feel right, I want you to get the fuck outta there, just go. According to the map the road loops back around on itself, so it will bring ya' right back inta' town. And we can meet up right back here."
"Are you sure you don't want Carl to go with you for back up?"
"I'm sure. I wanna' go in by myself. If Daryl is there I wanna tell him about what's happened, about both of ya...well all y'all." He said gesturing to everyone in the truck. "And if he's turned, I need to be the one to be there for my brother in the end, he deserves that much from me."
"Alright, I guess I'm not going to be changing your mind on that. Promise me that you'll be safe." She reached up and wrapped her arms around him. "I'll give you 15 minutes, and if you don't come back out then were coming in for you." She told him
"Better make it thirty. Daryl, he don't react well to surprises."
You've got thirty minutes from the time your front tire hits his driveway. I mean it Merle, thirty minutes max. If we don't see you after that, then we go in guns a blazin."
"No. Not jus no...Hell no." He told her firmly.
"Stick with the plan. For no reason are you to risk ya'self or the kids, especially for me...I can take care'ah myself, I mean it Beth. If I'm not back in 30 minutes, you take the kids back to the gas station. Give me two hours, and If I don't show in that time, you need to go. Start heading towards ya' Daddy's farm...follow the route we marked, if you need to switch, try and leave a sign. I'll catch up as soon as I can." He stepped away from her.
"Not just no...but Hell no." She threw his words back at him, and he had to grin at her sass. "I'm not going to leave you. I'll come here and wait for you to come get us."
He searched her eyes with his, and cupped her cheek telling her. "You and Dexy are the best thing that could have ever happened to me, and I need to know that ya' safe. I can handle anything, except losing ya'. So, you listen to ya' gut, if you fell like ya' need to go, then you go. I know where to find you."
"He walked her back to the car, and opened the door and forced her in. "Now I know where your son got his damn attitude, and his disrespect for authority." His voice and words were harsh , but the look on his face was pleased.
"Well that's where you're wrong. He's a four year old sharp-shooter who cusses like a drunken sailor...he clearly takes after you." She pointed out mildly.
Merle barked out a laugh as he leaned down to give her a short but demanding kiss.
Beth hands briefly went up to cup his cheeks before she pushed him back, putting her hands up as if to ward him off. "Merle Dixon, did you just start a fight in hopes of making up?"
"Nope, but I do like the way you kiss me when you're riled up. Fighting and making up is definitely going on my to do list." Merle said over his shoulder as he walked towards his bike.
When Joe first saw what he thought was his Suburban, it had thrown him. It was parked far enough away that he couldn't be sure that it was the one that he and Beth had been driving. He was almost surprised when it wasn't his wife that exited the vehicle, but instead a large, dangerous looking man. Behind him he could see smaller man who was standing guard next behind the open truck door with his weapon drawn. Unfortunately the dirty window prevented him from seeing if there was anyone else inside.
But what were the odds?
When the man had approached he had a fierce, almost hostile look in his eyes that had prevented Joe from right out attacking him. Even though he found himself a little intimidated, he neeed to find out if Beth and Dexy inside in truck parked in the distance. The big man gave nothing away, and there was something about the way he held himself that made Joe think twice about how he reacted.
The unfortunate truth was that Joe couldn't rely on brute strength anymore, because whatever Len had dosed him with had left him with lingering health issues. He had yet to regain his previous strength and he found himself sourly wondering if he ever would. His new reality was one where he tired easily, not a great thing when the dead themselves never seemed to lack energy. He was also having ha hard time keeping food down and he was dealing with ongoing bouts of diarrhea. It wasn't just weight he had lost but muscle too. The last time he saw himself in a mirror he was startled at the almost skeletal reflection that stared back at him.
Still off balance he had driven away, with the feeling of the man's eyes burning a hole in the back of his head. He had driven a few miles before he came to his senses, and pulled over. His body might be failing him, but his mind and his instincts were as sharp as as ever...maybe even sharper. He told the group they were stopping early, two of the more industrious men went to look for firewood without him having to ask, while the others sluggishly started to set up camp.
He had met these people in the same town not far from the house that Len had left him to die in. Hell, they made enough noise to wake the dead...of course there had been more people then. Unfortunately they didn't have much skill or luck in keeping their people alive. What had started off as a fairly large group of about thirty people that had all lived in the same apartment complex, was now down to eight. They had lost the last child in the group, a little boy about six months old, less than a week ago, Joe wasn't surprised when his mother took her own life the following day. Their deaths had left the group despondent and lethargic.
At first they were like a godsend, and he was happy just to stay with them until he regained his health, but it turned out they needed him more than he would ever need them. They might have been stronger than him, but they were god-damned fools, every man stupider than the last. His body was weak, but there was nothing wrong with his brain. His plan was to lay low, but he was surprised at their lack of skill and common sense and it wasn't long before he found himself more or less in charge.
As unprepared as they were, at least there was someone there to stand watch so he could take a dump without having to worry about the dead. But from the start he made his own decisions, always doing what he felt was going to be in his best interest. His choices always seemed to work out in his favor, the group noticed how he always seemed to come away with more with half the effort. They would have had to been blind as well as stupid not to have noticed. After a few weeks everyone just started following him like the sheep that they were.
The problem as he saw it was that this group was filled with possible Dan and Len's, there wasn't a trustworthy Billy among them. Therefore he knew without a doubt it wouldn't be long until one of them got into their head to to kill him and take Beth for himself. And that was what made this a group that he wouldn't feel comfortable bringing his pretty young wife and son into.
It didn't take him long to put them out of his misery,
Only a little over an hour behind the truck that might be holding his family, but it had taken him a few days to find them again. He approached carefully, because the other man had a lot of fire power. And while Joe had the guns he was running short on the bullets. He watched them for most of the day, before he was able to get close enough to confirm that it was in fact his Beth down by the fire.
He wanted to approach when the man left camp, but he had taken his boy and Dexy with him. As he watched he could tell that Beth was uneasy...jumpy. She must be worried about Dexy's safety with the man and he was worried that she might shoot him if he surprised her. The massive rifle in her hands was an accident in the making. When he got her back, she wouldn't need to worry about things like that, because he could take care of her. Beth was a good Mama, she was strong and smart but she knew next to nothing about guns. She would do anything to protect that boy of theirs. He knew that he would only have one chance at this, and he needed to make his move when he could get both Beth and Dexy at the same time. He was sure Beth wouldn't leave without Dexy and she would be more...amenable if she had him with her.
Joe couldn't help but wonder how she came to be with this man. Had he killed Len and taken her? How long had they been traveling together? What was her relationship with this man?
Had she let him fuck her?
When the man and the two boys got back to camp, he was happy to see that he kept his distance from Beth. But Dexy seemed a little too attached to the man and his children. His son was young, but he was old enough to know right from wrong. His boy would need to be reminded of that.
When they had slipped out during the middle of the night that's when he knew that the man was going to be a bigger problem than he had been anticipating. How had he known that someone was out in the woods watching? He had been careful to not been seen. Building the fires to push him back was clever, very clever...too clever. He was going to have to play it safe, use the element of surprise might be the only way he would be able to take this man down. And make no mistake he would be taking him down, it was only a matter of time. Beth had a plan, a good plan and he saw no reason she would change it. So unless the man had other plans, they would head toward Atlanta. So that is where he would go to find them.
He hadn't expected to find them again so soon, he was sure that they were so far ahead of him that it may take weeks if not months before he had his family back in his loving arms.
The town that he found them in was curiously light on the dead. It was clear that it had been picked almost clean, but he still managed to find enough to call it a good haul. It was early in the morning when he had arrived, and he decided to stick around and hit a few more places and find a place to hole up in. A good night's sleep in a real bed was something that he wasn't willing to pass up.
When he heard the gunshots of course he had to go have a look. It could be the one who cleaned the town out, he could follow them home, kill them and take their supplies, then he would be set. Once he found a place outside of Atlanta he could start leisurely and thoroughly searching the surrounding farming communities for his family. He wouldn't have to worry so much about scavenging on a daily basis if he played this right.
The town was small so it didn't take him long to find them, only a few blocks over from where he was he did. God must truly love him...God was on his side, how else could he explain the fact that he turned the corner to find his Suburban in the rear parking lot of a small strip mall. He backed away, not wanting to be seen. Quickly going back for the Jeep, he wasn't willing to run back to get it if they were only stopping, it was still early so they might be moving on at any time.
He pulled the Jeep as far down the alley as he could and still be able to see the truck. It wasn't long before he saw movement. At first it was just the man, then the man's oldest kid and Dexy came out to join him. Soon after Beth came out with the girl and they and they had the kids in the truck, he could see that the two adults were having a heated discussion. Beth was mad, judging by the way she was wagging her finger in the mans face. And then she kissed him...he must have imagined it, there was no way his wife would have willingly touched another man, she wouldn't dare.
Would she?
Joe's vision went a hazy red, his hands clenched the steering wheel as he imagined it was the other man's neck that he was squeezing the life out of. By the time his vision cleared the man on the motorcycle was peeling out of the parking lot and the truck was slowly pulling out to follow it. Quickly Joe backed the Jeep out of the alley, one way or another this was going to end.
Beth watched as Merle straddled his bike and put on his helmet. Feeling her eyes on him, he looked back over his shoulder and gave her a flirty wink, as he loudly revved his engine a few times. He spun, fishtailing leavino black tire marks across the parking lot.
"Show off." Beth sighed dramatically, causing the kids to giggle.
She was happy to see that once he hit the road, Merle had slowed down and was driving safely. She couldn't help but to admire the way he looked on that bike of his, he was a very physically fit man. Broad shoulders, and a wide chest that tapered slightly to his waist. She couldn't help but notice that he had lost quite a bit of weight since they had met. She would need to keep an eye out for some pants that would fit him better than the ones he was currently wearing.
They had only made it a few streets when a vehicle came barreling out from a side street. Having caught the movement out of the corner of his eye, Merle sped up trying to get out of its way. But it was already too late, as the back wheel of the bike got caught and crumpled under the front bumper of the white Jeep and Merle was catapulted over the handlebars. Beth lost sight of Merle as the Jeep came to a rocking stop on top of the downed bike.
"Stay with the kids!" Beth yelled to Carl as she grabbed her gun and ran to get between Merle and the other man. She could see the driver through the passenger side window, and caught sight of a gun as he raised his arm. As she rounded the front end of the Jeep, the man turned towards her, making her gasp in surprise.
JOE
Joe had his gun pointed at Merle's head, Beth knew she wouldn't be fast enough to stop him, so she tried her best to distract him.
"Joe? How? How are you here? Len, he told me that you were dead." She dropped her gun to her side. "I don't know how it happened, Joe, I promise...I didn't want to hurt you! I was so careful to only poison Len and Dan...I never intended to hurt you." She started to cry as she slowly walked towards him, doing her best to put her body between his and Merle's.
Joe kept his gun pointed down towards Merle, but angled it away from Beth. His attention, now on her. "I know you didn't, Beth." Joe acknowledged. "Len let me know it was him who slipped me the poison. Told me that he wanted me to think about him as I died a slow painful death and that Dan was an unfortunate yet acceptable loss. Speaking of Len, I've noticed he ain't around anymore, what happened to him?" He asked.
Beth swallowed painfully, her mouth too dry. "I...I killed him. Shot him as soon as I had the chance." She looked in him the eye. "And I'm not sorry. He hurt Dexy...he hurt me...I thought he had killed you. Nothing anyone could say to me will ever make me feel bad about it."
Joe gave her a half smile. "Good on you, knew you were smart...I guess I never realized just how strong you were. I admit that I've underestimated you...looks like I wasn't the only one who did that." Joe gave her a wry smile. "Believe me when I say that I'm glad you got clear of Len."
She watched his face go hard, and his eyes flinty. "I was mighty sick for awhile, but when I could, I tried to find you. Len is pretty predictable, at first I found traces of you. Always a day late and a dollar short, as the saying goes. Then all traces of you just stopped. Like you were a ghost, there yet not. I backtracked, looking for signs for weeks, I finally gave up hope of you still being alive. Imagine my surprise when I caught sight of my Suburban. And a new man driving my truck...holding my son...getting cozy with my wife." Beth's throat went dry as Joe raked her with his eyes. She couldn't imagine a worse nightmare than losing Merle and having to go back to Joe for any amount of time.
Joe continued. "What I'm not happy about is that you've had me running all over the state of Georgia trying to catch up with you." He gave her a one shoulder shrug. "But, if you were thinking that I was dead, I guess I won't hold you responsible for not coming back to look for me, or picking up any of the signs that I was trying to save you from whatever situation you've gotten yourself and our boy into."
His eyes narrowed even further. "But this." He gestured towards Merles prone, unconscious body. "This, I have a problem with. You been fucking him?" Joe asked her conversationally.
"No! Of course not!" Beth told him, lifting her chin definitely. "I have't let anyone fuck me! Not even Len, I killed him before he had the chance."
Joe was staring into her eyes, as if to judge her reaction, and lowering his gun, he shot Merle in the leg nonchalantly. Merle who was just stirring into semiconcousess, yelled out in pain, causingBeth to flinch. Joe kept his eyes on Beth. "Now, tell me the truth." He demanded in a cool voice.
She straightened her shoulders. "I swear to God, I have not had sex with him." Beth said stiffly. "I let him kiss me...I kissed him back...that's as far as it ever went." She lied, keeping her eyes connected to his
She pointed behind her. "He had kids with him and he needed help with them, I had Dexy and I needed help too. It was only a matter of convenience that we kept traveling together, the smart thing to do. For God's sake Joe, don't kill him. He is a good man who is taking care of two kids who aren't even his own...and he took care of me and Dexy. He treated us like family. Please, let's just walk away, let them do the same!" She pleaded with him.
When the shot rang out, Carl unbuckled his seatbelt and hurriedly moved into the driver's seat.
"Where are you going?! We can't leave them!" Dexy yelled.
"Just getting us out of range of the guns, I can't let anything happen to you or Judith." Carl explained as he looked past them out the back window as he tried to backup with the added addition of a bike trailer.
Dexy unbuckled himself and stood up out of his seat. "Dexy sit down before you get hurt." Carl tried to tell him, but Dexy had already opened the door and jumped out. "Dexy! Dexy! Come back, it's not safe!" He yelled, as the little boy ran towards the car wreck. Looking back at Judith...he knew he couldn't leave her. "Fuck!" He screamed in frustration, as he watched Dexy disappear around the back of the Jeep..
When Dexy peeked around the front bumper, he felt himself freeze in fear.
Joe?
Joe didn't look like he was dead like Len had said he was. But dead or not he knew that Joe was still a monster. It was just like Mama told him, sometimes it was hard to tell if someone was just as dead inside as a walker.
Joe was yelling at Mama. Dexy felt like his stomach was filled with ice and fire at the same time. Mama was trying to talk Joe out of killing Merle, but he knew that she would never be able to change Joes mind. He was going to kill Merle, because that is just who Joe was.
He looked past Mama and Joe to where he could see Papa on the ground. He must be hurt bad, or else he would be up and making Joe go away. And he knew that in a fair fight Joe wouldn't stand a chance against Papa. But Joe didn't fight fair, and Dexy couldn't remember if he had ever mentioned that to Papa. The fact that Papa was still down on the ground, surrounded by so much blood made him think that Papa wasn't going to be able to save them from Joe. It didn't even look like Papa would be able to save himself.
Maybe he hadn't been strong enough to save himself of Mama in before. But he was stronger now. He was smarter now too. He wasn't no limp-dick.
Swallowing past the lump of fear that was stuck in his throat, he straightened his small shoulders. He was still afraid of Joe...but he knew what he had to do. He was Dexy Dixon...and Dexy Dixon was brave and could kill a walker on his own if he really needed to. And Dexy Dixon would do whatever he needed to do to save Papa, and to keep Mama out of Joe's hands.
"Daddy?" He called as he stepped around the bumper.
Joe whipped his head towards the boys voice, seeing Dexy standing by the Jeep. Then the boy was running towards him his arms out, "Daddy! Daddy!" Joe just manage to catch him, pulling him up into his arms.
"Son." Joe said a pleased look on his face. "I've been looking for you. Did you miss me?" He asked.
"Yeh-th, Daddy. But Len said you were dead, said you were never coming for us." Dexy told him.
Joe pulled back to look Dexy in the eye. "I will always come for you Dexy. You and your Mama are mine, and I always take care of what is mine." He told the boy in his arms.
Dexy nodded in agreement. "I know."
"And what can you tell me about this man? He good to you? Good to your Mommy?" Joe wanted to know, turning back to look at Merle.
"He's nice. Not bad like Len or Bad Dan...not bad like you." Joe craned his head looking back at Dexy with surprised and angry eyes, his mouth opened, but Dexy didn't give him time to say anything. The bullet that tore through his brain stopped the words from forming.