So late I guess that for some it will be tomorrow when you read this, but here we are. And I probably could have split this in two parts, but the last chapters are written and only need to be edited, and they won't be this long, so it's long.
There are many more changes in this chapter than it will probably seem there should be, but since much of this is in Athelstan's perspective, I wanted it to feel just a little different from what actually happened. Lilith's presence changed everything. And for the most part, I think it was worth it. And the last little bit is in Lilith's perspective, because reasons.
More at the bottom. Enjoy!
Uppsala
After days of travel, after sailing and walking and climbing as far as he ever had in his life, Athelstan gazed upon the temple at Uppsala and knew he had never seen anything like it in his life. He could barely catch his breath, holding Lilith's hand on his right side and clutching his sleeping bundle that was slung over his shoulder with his left hand.
Five days earlier, when they had left Kattegat to come here, he'd been reminded by nearly everyone that when he saw the temple, he would be more amazed than he ever had been in his life. For the most part, that was true. The mountains had been the most impressive, despite being surrounded by them for the last two years. Athelstan had never climbed so much before now. And he knew Lilith struggled as well. Thankfully, they had been blessed with Leif's presence through the entire journey.
Since Elisef had stayed behind, along with Edda and Þórunn, Leif had focused almost every second of their journey to keeping Lilith and Gyda company as Ragnar demanded all of Athelstan's attention. Lagertha had fed her children when it was time, but she mostly stayed on the other end of the boat, eyeing her husband almost like she wanted to set him on fire. For once, Athelstan could sympathize with her, and whenever she looked in his direction, she could see that.
"Try not to get too distracted, Athelstan," Leif said as they climbed together. "You're almost to the end of your journey. Best not to stumble."
Leif's words left Athelstan confused, but he didn't respond, holding Lilith's hand tighter so she wouldn't fall. She couldn't stop looking at everything either, and he wanted her to experience everything here there was to experience.
"Have you ever seen anything like this, Athelstan?" she asked as they arrived at the main path and followed everyone else up the hillside.
"I have not," he said and sighed softly. "But it reminds me of the church in Hexham. I traveled there once when you were four or five. Brother Cuthren took me so we could bargain for a new plow for the crops we needed to plant. It looked so magnificent, and I was marveled by how it had been built. But this is so much more spectacular than that."
Lilith laughed softly, pulling him along as Siggy and Thyri caught up to them.
All along the journey here, on the boat and during their climb, Athelstan had noticed Thyri watching him. At one point, she had smiled at him with a knowing grin, and it had made him so uncomfortable that Ragnar had noticed. She clearly knew something Athelstan did not, and she wasn't very good at hiding it. Whatever it was, her staring and smiling got worse the closer they got to the temple, and now that they were here, it appeared she couldn't contain herself. After catching her so many times with Roald, Athelstan was surprised at her. Was she really like the way Olaf had described her?
Siggy, on the other hand, gave him only a moment's attention when he had mentioned how Ragnar and Lagertha were almost ignoring each other.
"It is because she can no longer bear him sons," she snipped at him. "If she cannot do that, then he must find someone who can. That is how our world works, Priest. Sons ensure a legacy continues."
Athelstan could not hide his confusion. "Surely, having daughters is just as important. Gyda is just as capable of carrying his legacy as Bjorn would be. And so is Lili."
Siggy had scoffed. "If we only ever had daughters, our world would not thrive. Our daughters must bear the burden of ensuring our alliances. Just as my daughter was bid before her father died. Gyda and Lilith will be required to do the same thing if that day comes, and Earl Ragnar will see to that, Priest."
Though her answer horrified him, Athelstan could only think how callous it would be of Ragnar to expect any woman to provide him with sons solely for the purpose of ensuring his own legacy. He knew it was so much more different here than where he'd come from, but he didn't understand how any culture could be that way. And surely, there had to be a way to protect Lilith from all of that. Ragnar had to know that Athelstan would never allow it.
The Grove was impressive, sprinkled with wreaths and decorations meant to invoke the gods. It reminded Athelstan of Christmas when he and Lilith had decorated the gathering hall with holly and garland. Instinctively, Athelstan knew this place was nothing like that, but he could pretend for a little while until it was necessary for him to accept another truth.
"Athelstan," Lagertha called, bringing his attention to her. She waved him forward, and he hurried to her side. "Stay close with Lilith until after we are blessed in the temple. Then you will be free to walk around the ceremonial grounds."
She squeezed his arm gently, and he bowed his hand, helping Lilith up the steps as she followed Bjorn and Gyda up the steps to the front door.
Lined up along the edges of the walkway, priests greeted them with low hums. They reminded Athelstan of the bishops he had seen visit the monastery to give them blessings, except these men bore make-up on their face that was both terrifying and intriguing. What purpose did it serve? Floki and Helga frequently painted their faces, but why? Was it something they did to please the gods?
Inside the temple, carved wooden statues depicted the gods, looming over them as watchers and monoliths of an ancient culture. Athelstan had never seen anything like them. Lilith tried to hurry ahead of him, and he stopped her as quickly as he could.
"Slow down, Lili," he whispered urgently. "It will not go faster just because you run there."
She sighed softly and waited for him, watching as Lagertha waved them forward and looking up at him to make sure it was all right. He nodded for her to go ahead, and she smiled, stepping forward as Ragnar turned and beckoned her to him. He grinned at Athelstan and nodded to Gyda's other side as they all stepped up to face the older priest waiting.
The blessing turned out to be something that Athelstan was familiar with, as the priest sprinkled blood on each of them as he invoked the gods. Once that was done, Lagertha pulled the girls in one direction as Ragnar nodded for Bjorn and Athelstan to go in the opposite direction. The first carved statue they came to was Thor was he held his hammer over them all, and Athelstan thought of the visit he'd had from the god so many months ago, as well as the words they had shared. Since then, Athelstan had tried to invoke the god many times, but that first time had been the only one where they had spoken. Athelstan had never told anyone about it, but while they were here, maybe he would.
After the statue of Thor was Odin, whom Ragnar always claimed kinship to, and after Bjorn was given the chance to pray to the god, Ragnar went after him to invoke the god personally. Athelstan watched quietly, remembering what Siggy had said and how distant Lagertha had been, and he wondered. Now that it was believed that Lagertha could no longer bear him sons, would he pray for another woman who could? From everything Athelstan knew about Ragnar and Lagertha, they had always been in love, so fiercely that absolutely nothing could ever come between them. Athelstan had watched the two of them share in the joy of a new child, and he had watched Lagertha lose that child, watched the light in her eyes fade until she was only a shadow of herself. He had watched Ragnar comfort Lagertha and then slowly, the comfort had stopped.
Was it right for Ragnar to only care about sons for his own legacy? Was he really that selfish, and would he really commit his own daughters to alliances with men who promised him things? Athelstan knew he would never be able to allow that. Ragnar had to know that.
The vendors behind the statues drew several people to them, selling trinkets and spices to anyone who they caught in their net. Lagertha had stopped at a woman's booth who was selling hair beads, and Athelstan drifted over to where she stood. Gyda was already folding a silver piece into her hair, and Lilith eagerly waited for her own.
"Already enjoying yourself, I see," he said, and she turned to him smiling.
"Athelstan! That woman over there," she pointed to another stall that was selling precious stones, "says that my necklace you gave me is a gift from Freyja. She also said it brings out the brown in my eyes, whatever that means. Did you know when you bought it that it was for the goddess of love and beauty?"
He shook his head even as he grinned. "I'm afraid I didn't. I was still learning the language, and all I knew what that it was pretty. That's quite the coincidence that you have a necklace for a goddess who is not only beautiful but also powerful. It suits you."
Lilith beamed so proudly that she barely saw Lagertha reach for her.
"Lilith, my daughter, come face me," her mother summoned.
While they did that, Athelstan looked around the temple, taking in the light as it streamed in through the ceiling. Never in his life had he seen light do that, and it filled him with a hope he had never felt. It felt like anything could happen.
When Lagertha and the girls finished with the vendor, she led them all outside through the back of the temple. Before them, the ceremonial grounds spread out across the hillside, covered in trees, more decorations, and little tents and huts for dwelling. There were hundreds of people making their way through the trees, from this group of patrons and that one. Athelstan saw some children, but for the most part, adults milled around with drinks and food. It was unlike anything he had ever seen.
The hut they would be occupying had four different rooms, surrounding the main room where they would eat, and Lagertha bid them all to sit down as a few of the servants they had brought with them tended a fire in the middle of the room. Despite leaving Ingrid behind with Þórunn and Edda, Kindra and Tova had been allowed to come, mostly since they had both come before. Kindra was happy to see Athelstan, nodding to him and assuring him that everything was all right. Tova smiled when he stepped up beside her, but she chose not to speak.
"All right, girls," Lagertha said to Lilith and Gyda, "stow your satchels until after supper, and if you want, you may change out of your boots and put on your shoes to explore a little. Athelstan," she said, and he turned to her, "make sure we have everything we need for everyone to eat. Tomorrow will be a long day for some of us."
He bowed his head slightly. "Of course, my lady."
Slowly, the others in their group came into the hut, gathering around in the limited seating and taking drinks as they waited for the food. Athelstan felt more than one person in the room watching him, on several occasions, but whenever he looked around, no one was looking at him. Lilith was helping Gyda and Lagertha with vegetables. Bjorn was laughing with Arne and Torstein. Ragnar was . . . being Ragnar, which was expected. It was strange.
Still, Athelstan tried to focus on his task, standing beside Tova and across from Kindra as they prepared the spices for the foods.
"So you have both been here before?" he asked them softly.
"I have," Kindra said first, smiling slightly. "When I was a girl. Haralson's father allowed me to go."
He nodded, turning his gaze to Tova as she remained quiet. "What about you, Tova?"
With a deep breath, she looked up at him. "I was seventeen. I helped prepare the sacrifices. It was a very eye-opening experience."
Something in her voice warned him about what she had seen or heard the last time she had come, but Athelstan wanted to reassure her as much as he could given the circumstances. "Certainly, this time will be different," he said and squeezed her shoulder gently.
Her face went blank as her eyes widened, and Athelstan didn't think he'd said anything wrong. She walked away before he could say anything else, leaving him confused and worried. Kindra stepped around to his side to stop him from going after her.
"It's all right, Athelstan," she insisted. "I'll go see about her. Stay here."
He exhaled sharply, bowing his head again, and glancing around again when he felt someone watching him. This time, it was Thryi who was looking at him, and Athelstan huffed, moving away from the table to sit down. From here, he saw everyone else in various stages of supper preparations and deep conversations. For the moment, he was the only one doing neither of those things, and then out of the corner of his eye, he saw Ragnar watching him. Arne came to give him a drink, and slowly, his attention was taken away from the eyes on him that suddenly made him uneasy.
Slowly, as the food became ready, bowls were served and the talking almost completely stopped. But again, slowly, as the food disappeared, the house cleared of almost everyone except for Lagertha, the children and Athelstan. Ragnar didn't leave, but he may as well have not been there for as quiet as he was. Kindra and Tova remained in the hut as well, putting away the unused food and turning down the beds that would be slept in for the duration of their stay on the grounds.
"All right, children," Lagertha said, reaching for the girls and Bjorn. "For just a little while, we can look around. It will be bedtime soon, and I'm sure you'll want to save all your strength for tomorrow."
She nodded for Athelstan to go with her, and Lilith reached for him once he was close enough so they could leave the hut together.
The only thing different about the ceremonial grounds were the pins holding all the animals, and when Athelstan first saw them, he guessed it was because of so many people being near the temple. But then he remembered that they had brought food with them, and it made him curious. What were all these animals for, if not to feed anyone?
"Lagertha," he said as they all walked around, between these trees and around those groups of people already sitting around fires.
"Yes, Athelstan?" she said and glanced back at him.
"What are all these animals pinned up for? We brought all our food with us, so I'm wondering why they're here."
For almost a minute, she didn't say anything, glancing around and then off in the distance before she looked back at him. "These animals will all be killed as sacrifices, as part of the ceremony at the end of the festival. The same way our animals are a part of our ceremonies. They play their part just as we all do."
Athelstan looked around again, seeing goats, chickens and pigs, but there were also deer and horses. It shouldn't have stunned him to have all these animals here, but it did. For many months now, nearly a year, Athelstan had found himself praying many times to the God of his homeland. After Lagertha's miscarriage, when she and Ragnar had begun to drift apart, when Ragnar had insisted on taking Athelstan hunting for the first time in his life, Athelstan had prayed. For strength, for courage, for a stronger constitution so he wouldn't vomit at the sight of Ragnar butchering a large deer and strongly encouraging Athelstan to assist him.
Was his Christianity beginning to rear its forgotten head after so long? Did he really have so much trouble with the sacrifice of animals, when he'd already seen it done by the very people who had come here with him? His conscience had never left him, but now it felt like his soul was warning him about something. What more could he need to be warned of but the sacrifices of animals to the gods of the land he currently occupied?
Slowly, he began to count. Nine horses. Nine deer. "Nine goats and nine pigs," he exclaimed. "There's nine of everything."
Lagertha grinned as she lowered her gaze to the girls. They both looked up at her and then at Athelstan. "Yes," she acknowledged. "Nine males of every species. You will remember that the number nine has a great significance to us."
Athelstan nodded. "Yes, the nine realms of Yggdrasil and the nine mothers of Heimdallr. The nine daughters of Ægir. And Odin hanged for nine and days and nights to receive rúnar, the knowledge of the runes."
Her grin grew to a proud smile. "Yes. See, you have learned some things of our culture. That is very good."
He bowed his head, tucking his chin to his chest. "I only know it because of you. And Ragnar. Though when I speak to him, he mostly wants to know about where I come from. It takes a great deal of ale for him to talk about himself."
Lagertha sighed softly. "I have known him for as long as my son has been alive inside me, and sometimes, he is still a mystery to me. So don't take it to heart. When he is ready, he will tell you, and you will not be able to stop him."
As they walked through the grove, they came upon an empty pin that was a little bigger than the others. Unlike the others, there was no water or food in this one, and Athelstan was confused, stopping to gauge its purpose.
"My Lady, what is this pin for?" he asked.
Lagertha sighed, glancing at Gyda and Lilith again before she spoke. "This is for the humans who have been chosen to be sacrificed," she stated as plainly as she could.
"Humans?" Lilith exclaimed.
"Yes, Lilith, my dear," Lagertha soothed as gently as she could. She leaned over a little so she could hold Lilith's shoulders as she spoke. "Sometimes, the gods demand much more from us than our animals and our homes. Sometimes, they demand our lives. And they are gods. And we must do what they bid us to do. The men chosen for this honor are ensuring that we survive and thrive in this changing world, and we honor them by continuing to live our lives by way of the gods who bid us to do so. And now that you are a part of our world, they will do it for you as well. For your safety and your prosperity. I know from what Athelstan has told me," she said and looked up at him to see a terrified expression on his face, "that your God asks you to sacrifice things to live a more devout life. And even though the things sacrificed might not be the same, the intention is the same. Is it not?"
Lilith sighed heavily and lifted her gaze to Athelstan. She didn't say anything but the thoughtful look on her face made it obvious that she was contemplating what Lagertha said. She looked back at the pin and then up at Athelstan, moving forward to take his hand and pull him off away from that part of the grove. Lagertha came up beside him, pulling Gyda with her.
"Ragnar should have spoken to you earlier," Lagertha said softly. "He should've told you more about what will happen over the next several days. I'm glad I was able to tell you what you needed to know. Since we don't want you to misunderstand something. If there is anything else you wish to know, you simply have to ask. Hmm?"
Athelstan bowed his head, holding Lilith's hand tighter and following Lagertha and the children around the grounds until it was obvious they were going back to the hut for the night. With the summer months already begun, the light had only diminished enough for there to be shadows through the trees and fires lit to keep everyone warm. It was going to be difficult to get Gyda and Lilith to focus with so much going on, much less Bjorn, since all he wanted was to follow his father everywhere.
The first full day of the festival was marked with small offerings. They had brought many of these from the people in town, and Kindra showed Athelstan how those were arranged. Lagertha spent that time visiting more of the vendors with Lilith and Gyda to purchase small gifts that she later told him would be going home with them for Edda and Þórunn. She also explained that giving their patron to the vendors allowed them to share the wealth they had gained. Of course, it made more sense when she explained.
At night, Ragnar bid Athelstan to drink and interact with the other people in the grove. Even though it was easy to see his intention, Athelstan still struggled not to drink too much. Nearly everyone else did the same as Ragnar, and it was difficult to refuse.
On the second and third days, the celebrations outside the hut became louder to the point that the drums and shouting and moaning could be heard through every wall of the hut. It became difficult for Lagertha to keep the children inside at night, and at the end of the third day, Ragnar left the hut even after Lagertha pleaded for him to stay.
"It's only because of the excitement," Athelstan tried to explain as he ate next to Lilith.
For half a minute, Lagertha did not speak, the food in front of her waiting for her to take the first bite. Then she took a deep breath and lifted her gaze to him. "Ragnar is free to do what he will while we are here," she huffed. "And you are not responsible for him or anyone else here."
Stunned, Athelstan glanced at Lilith and then Gyda before bowing his head.
"Tomorrow," she said after a minute, "you should join the others in the grove, Athelstan. I will keep up with the girls. But you should get to experience the festival the same as everyone else."
At first, he wanted to argue, since he didn't want to leave her to do anything alone, but by the tone of her voice, he knew she wasn't asking him to do this. She was commanding him. So he only hesitated a little before he answered her. "Yes, My Lady."
That ended the discussion right there.
The next morning, despite not knowing what to expect, Athelstan left the relative safety of the hut to walk around the grove by himself. He quickly discovered the people populating the grove were all engaged in a heightened feast-like frenzy. Some people were already drunk. Many people were huddle around small fires in the midst of drinking and eating. A few people had paired off and were in various stages of undress.
It was nothing Athelstan had never seen before, especially with the feasts and sacrifices he had attended at Ragnar's side. Of course, he had not been in such close proximity of some of it, but the benefits of seeing much of it already prevented Athelstan from being too overwhelmed. That did not mean he was accustomed to it. Quite the contrary. But that didn't mean he would just embrace the mayhem.
"Athelstan!"
His name broke through the noise, and he followed it to where nearly everyone in their group was sitting around a small fire. Helga stood up and waved him over to her, smiling brightly as he followed her pull and reaching for him as he came to be beside her.
"Drink!" she giggled. "Drink to the night and to the gods. It would not be right if you did not get to do that now."
She handed him a small cup, and as soon as he took it, she kissed his cheek and then his lips. Athelstan should have been shocked at her behavior, but he knew everyone here was fully immersed in the festivities, and he couldn't really fault them for that. Honestly, having her behave this way made him think of the few times Lilith had done the same thing. He knew it wasn't uncommon anyway.
"You should enjoy yourself while you are here, Priest," Floki taunted. "Who knows when you will have the opportunity again."
Athelstan smirked as he drank. Of course Floki would be the teasing, almost-threatening one of the group. Usually, it was Rollo who would look at him with a threat in his eyes. Right now, Rollo was the one smiling and laughing as he reclined in Siggy's arms.
"Come here, Priest," Rollo commanded with a soft chuckle. He reached behind him for a small bowl and presented it to Athelstan as he knelt in front of Rollo. "This is the food of the gods, and it will open you up to their influence. Eat."
In the bowl, a variety of mushrooms waited to be plucked. Athelstan didn't want to appear reluctant, even if the last time he had experienced anything like that, he had woken with a horrible headache. But if he was going to be accepted, he would have to forgo many of the restrictions he had put on himself so many years earlier. So he reached into the bowl and took a healthy helping of the mushrooms, lifting it to his mouth and eating it quickly.
Instantly, the taste overpowered every bit of ale he'd drunk since arriving. It wasn't a good taste either, almost like dirt and salt, but then Rollo nodded to his cup for him to take a drink. Athelstan tried to take a small sip, but Rollo nudged the end up further, causing him to swallow a gulp of ale along with the mushrooms, as they disappeared into his stomach.
"Very good, Priest," Rollo nodded. He lifted his hands to Athelstan's face, speaking directly to him for what felt like the first time. "May the gods in their wisdom bless you and show themselves to you, if you are worthy."
For a second, Athelstan thought Rollo was going to kiss him like Helga had. Instead, he nodded and released Athelstan's face, again reclining in Siggy's arms. She laughed softly, and slowly, everyone did as well. Arne and Leif both raised their cups to him, and Thyri grinned at him over her own cup, making it difficult to think of anything other than her behavior all the way here.
Slowly, as the mushrooms and ale worked its way through his system, Athelstan lost all track of time. He wandered away from their small group after Rollo sent him on his way. Many of the people around him called for him, though it didn't seem possible for them to know his name. Men clapped their hands over his shoulders, and women reached for his face to kiss him. One woman almost succeeded in pulling him off to her tent, but he staggered away from her to find his own party.
The light diminished enough for the fires to become almost as bright as the day. Everything around him began to blur together, and as his dizziness got worse, Athelstan saw the orange of the fires turn yellow and then white. The smoke turned to mist, and the white turned to a dress flowing through the air away from him. The laughing around him focused into a single sound from a familiar source, and Athelstan tried to follow the sound as he wandered through the grove. He tried not to trip and fall, looking for the white dress again and seeing it just behind a tall tree, wrapped around the body of a familiar woman.
Her scarred skin gave her away, but her smile captivated him as it always had. She peeked around the tree, laughing again and noticing that he had seen her. Before he could touch her, she shot off into the trees, further away from the part of the grove he was somewhat familiar with. Athelstan followed her, having not dreamt of her in months despite the fact that she had been by his side the entire time. He knew her smile because he had been the first person she had ever smiled at, and he knew her laugh because he had been the first she had ever laughed with. No one else would ever smile at him the way she did, and no one else would ever laugh with him the way she did.
The white dress drew him closer to her, as did her spirited laugh and her quick steps. It was a game they were playing, and she always won. She had always been able to hide from him. He had never been able to hide from her.
No sooner did he see her in front of him did he trip and fall, landing on his hands and finding himself back in the grove. The fires turned back to orange, and the smoke diminished his vision, making it impossible for him to see anything. Had she been real? Would he be able to find her again?
"Come now, Athelstan," he heard behind him and looked up to see Leif. "Surely, Rollo did not make it where the gods could not reach you in such a heightened state."
He reached down and took Athelstan by the shoulders, lifting him to his feet and steadying him easily. Athelstan lifted his hands to Leif, no longer desperate to move forward.
"Leif," he pleaded. "I am lost. Please help me find my way."
For a few short seconds, it was like they were the only two people in the entire grove. Leif smiled and released Athelstan, turning him around until he faced the direction he had come from.
"You are not lost, Athelstan. The gods know your path. All you have to do is follow it. Hmm?"
The smoke cleared for just half a minute, and Athelstan took one tentative step forward before another and then another until he was moving toward the part of the grove he had come from. He glanced behind him just once, but Leif was gone. With a little more resolve, Athelstan moved over the ground with a little more ease than before. He didn't know if his head was clearing up, but he kept walking until he found the hut he'd left that morning. Or was it a different day? How long had he been gone?
Athelstan knew this was the right hut, seeing Ragnar's banner over the entryway as he stumbled inside and managed to sit down at the table. It could have been minutes or hours, but he held his head the entire time, wishing for the room to stop spinning.
"Athelstan?"
He looked up to see two Lagertha's there as she watched over him. Her nightgown glimmered even in the low light of the hut, and her hair flowed around her shoulders like wings as she sat beside him and took his hand in hers.
"You're bleeding," she said and lay a wet cloth over his palm.
In his intoxicated state, he hadn't even realized he was hurt, and he leaned forward with his head in his other hand. "I should not have left the hut," he huffed.
For several seconds, she didn't speak, pressing the cloth to his skin and holding his hand in hers. The hearth at the center of the hut crackled loudly, but other than that, it was completely quiet. Athelstan wondered if he would be able to lay down and sleep off whatever Rollo had given him, but before he could stand up to do that, Lagertha took his other hand in hers.
"This is a part of your journey, Athelstan," she told him, sighing softly. "It is the way of the gods, and you have been made to follow this way. You would not be here otherwise."
All Athelstan could do at this point was huff again and try to take a deep breath. Everyone had been speaking to him this way since before leaving Kattegat, and honestly, it was becoming tiresome to try and decipher their meaning. Surely, they did not still mean for him to remain ignorant as they once had. He wasn't as unobservant as he had once been. Over the last two years, Athelstan had been rather adept at reading these people, and he knew something very certain. There was something about this place they weren't telling him.
"Lady Lagertha."
The familiar, yet unfamiliar voice caught his attention, and he and Lagertha both looked up to see Thyri there by herself. Lagertha let go of Athelstan's hand only long enough to help him to his feet. He was still dizzy, but Lagertha held him steady.
"You need to go with Thyri now," she told him and nodded. "She will take you to . . . lie down. And in the morning, everything will be so much clearer. I promise."
Though he did not understand why he could not stay where he was, Athelstan knew by Lagertha's tone that it was not a suggestion that he leave with Thyri. He knew she was again commanding him. So when Thyri stepped forward and took his hand, he didn't hesitate as much as he would have, allowing her to lead him away from the hut.
"Come, Priest," Thyri said and grinned. "I will help you."
Athelstan was only able to look back once, watching Lagertha as she watched him with what looked like grief in her eyes. The same grief from when she had lost her unborn child a year earlier. It was so strange.
Thyri led Athelstan to a smaller hut, almost a tent, and she sat him down next to the fire in the middle. He was still dizzy, so sitting on the ground was better than standing up at the moment. She handed him a cup, and he took it very reluctantly.
"What is it?" he asked, lifting his gaze to her as she knelt in front of him.
"Water," she said simply. "You should be clear-headed now."
Athelstan took a hesitant sip, making sure it was water she gave him before he took as big a gulp as he could. The cool water hit his stomach like hot metal hitting cold water, and he almost vomited right then. Somehow, he managed to hold onto the contents of his stomach, and he took another drink of the water. Though the dizziness remained, his vision cleared, and he looked around, noting how small the tent was.
"Why did you bring me here?" he asked, taking the last gulp of water. "Would it not have been better to stay with Lagertha?"
Thyri poured more water into the cup and grinned, scooting a little closer to him. "Not now," she informed him. "You will understand soon enough."
Athelstan scoffed over his cup. More cryptic words. And these came from a woman he barely knew who had recently been involved with another man. How was he supposed to trust anything these people told him if they insisted he remain ignorant until it was convenient for them?
As he continued to drink the water, Thyri rose up to be on her knees, and she waited just a moment before she began untying the side of her dress. Athelstan tried to stop her, not understanding what she was doing even if he was absolutely positive it was wrong for her to do it.
"No, Thyri," he pleaded. "We cannot. I cannot."
"But we must," she whispered, shrugging out of her dress to be naked from the waist up.
Athelstan had never seen a woman naked this close up, and his body had not felt a naked woman this close to him. But it did not change the fact that he did not want to do this now. What about Lagertha and the girls? What about Lilith? She would worry about him. Thyri cared not for his protests, reaching out to untie the front of his tunic.
"Why must we?" he asked only a second before she kissed him on the mouth.
She grinned as she pushed the tunic off so he was naked from the waist up as well. "It is because we have to. Don't you understand?"
Her fingers played with the strings holding his pants together, and her cryptic words angered him more than any of the others ever had. "No, I don't understand," he shouted, startling her. "Why must this happen now? When I don't even want it to happen. Why, Thyri?"
She stuttered for several seconds, giving him enough time to stand up with the waist of his pants held up by his own hands. She rose in front of him, allowing her dress to fall to the ground, and when he gazed upon her naked body, Athelstan began to understand her behavior a little.
"Is this because I am the Earl's steward?" he demanded. "Is this so you and your mother can yet again be in good standing with the man who replaced your father? Because I am telling you now that it will not work. I am dedicated another person here."
She held up her hands in surrender, still grinning as she stepped closer to him. "That is not why I am doing this," she said softly. "I swear on the gods. I would never do that for my mother."
He stood up straight as she lay her hands on his shoulders, almost holding him still as she inched closer until her bare chest could touch his. The instant her taut nipples brushed against his skin, Athelstan lost almost all his composure. He clenched his fists, not wanting to give in no matter how much his body wanted him to. He would not be ruled by physical manipulation, and he would not succumb to the lull in her voice or the warmth of her skin. He couldn't. He would be lost to God if he did.
Athelstan backed away from her again, realizing why this was wrong and why he couldn't go through with it. "Thyri, please. I cannot do this. I promised someone a long time ago that I wouldn't do this, and I cannot break that promise. You must understand."
"It does not matter, Priest," she shook her head. "I am bid by the gods and my Earl to do this, and I must."
The thought of Ragnar asking Thyri to do what she was doing now made no sense to Athelstan, not even with as strange as Ragnar and Thyri had both been acting. Why would it be so important to him that she do this?
Athelstan stalked forward and grabbed her by the arms. "Tell me why Ragnar wants you to do this," he commanded. "Tell me why it's so important for you to do this."
She hesitated for almost a second, and he shook her roughly.
"Tell me," he shouted.
The fear in her eyes should have deterred him from being so forceful, but Athelstan was done with being treated this way. He was done with them saying cryptic words and looking at him in their cryptic ways. He was done being ignorant.
"It is because you are to be sacrificed at the end of the ceremony," she cried as she tried to pull her arms from his hands.
Athelstan could not hide his shock, not even after all the cryptic words and cryptic looks and seeing the animals to be sacrificed and Lagertha's kind words when she had spoken to him and the girls. He could not hide his astonishment, not even after he'd felt something strange was going on. It made sense. They were all treating him this way because they did not believe he was going back with them to Kattegat. Of course.
Slowly, he let go of her, stepping away. "They told you to do this," he realized.
She bowed her head, almost ashamed. "I was given a choice, but yes, they said it had to be me. No one else was unattached, and after they told me, I wanted to do it. You have nothing to fear, Priest. I will take care of everything."
Thyri stepped forward again, trying to touch his face again as he stopped her.
"What else did Ragnar tell you to do, other than take me to your bed?" he demanded.
She huffed. "Afterward," she said and looked up at him, "I am meant to wash you and let them know you are ready."
Athelstan scoffed and shook his head, letting go of her. "So my ignorance is more important to them than my dignity. They wanted me to go into this blind and deaf and dumb, instead of knowing what my fate would be. Without even thinking I might not even want to go through with it. With this barbaric ritual of sacrificing people. You go tell them I'm ready. Tell them I enjoyed it. And I will sit here with the knowledge that they neither cared for my well-being nor my intelligence. To think that any of you believed I would ever leave Lili, for any reason?"
She didn't move for a minute, and he clenched his fists.
"Go!"
There was no hesitation in her movements as she gathered up her clothes and moved to leave the tent. Just before she did, she glanced back at him and the glare in his eyes. She didn't say anything, but Athelstan didn't need her to. She wouldn't say anything to the others, because that would be her being ridiculed for failing. So now he had to think of what he would say to Ragnar and Lagertha.
Both of them had known all the way here what would happen to him, and they had both lied to him and Lilith about what happened at this place. At least Lagertha had informed him of the sacrifices. But Ragnar had said nothing. Athelstan had to know why.
The fire in the tent diminished before Athelstan realized he hadn't slept at all, and he stuck his head outside the tent to see the grove lit up with early morning light. He pulled his tunic back on and replaced his belt, remembering what Thyri had said and knowing he hadn't accepted whatever decision had been made without his knowledge or consent. He didn't know how he was going to confront Ragnar, but when he stepped out of the tent and realized how close to the grove and animal pins he truly was, Athelstan felt shame for the first time in two years.
The gravity of the situation he'd found himself in hit as heavy as a blow to the chest, and seeing nearly nine men in the pin for the humans only made him feel worse. He had been primed and drunken and intoxicated to the point that he shouldn't have refused Thyri, but he had. And that had to make a difference.
Before he had the chance to go and find Ragnar to tell him what he'd been told and to see the truth of it in his eyes, Ragnar found him, who, along with Floki, looked like he'd been waiting for Athelstan to emerge from the tent Thyri had taken him to.
"Athelstan!" he called and nodded him closer. "I want you to meet someone."
That someone turned out to be King Horik of Denmark, an intriguing man who surrounded himself with guards and had just come to the festival a day earlier even though it had already been going on for nearly five days. He greeted Ragnar warmly, and they spoke to each other like it had been fated by the gods that they meet. Athelstan only sat there trying his hardest to contain the anger he now felt toward Ragnar. It did not help matters when Ragnar spoke to Horik about the things they had once spoken about before he sailed to England a year earlier.
"I'm not satisfied with what I have achieved so far," Ragnar inferred to King Horik. "I want to send bigger raiding parties to the west, yes to plunder, but also to explore new lands."
Horik looked about as shocked as a bird soaring through the sky. "There are other lands to west?" he questioned, marveled, or something resembling it.
Ragnar grinned his knowing grin. "There is a kingdom called Francia. It is a kingdom far larger, far richer and far more powerful than England," he revealed, to which Athelstan shook his head to himself. Athelstan knew it had always been a possibility of this happening, but he hadn't realized why Ragnar had suddenly wanted to know when they had boarded the boat to come here. Now he knew.
"Athelstan, come," Ragnar beckoned, extended his hand and nodding for Athelstan to come to him. Reluctantly, he did as he was bid, sitting uncomfortably next to Ragnar to face King Horik. "This man has seen it."
The king looked up at Ragnar and then at Athelstan, leaning forward and prompting him to speak.
"I was a Christian monk in England," he began slowly. "I traveled to different lands as a missionary. We went to Francia when I was nineteen."
The curious expression on Horik's face morphed into a wide smile, and he nodded. "I have heard of Christians," he revealed, "and of their God. And are you still a Christian?"
The question was a simple one, considering Athelstan hadn't really been praying regularly for over a year, maybe two. But there was something else in Horik's voice, a challenge of some kind, and Athelstan knew it wasn't just a question. It was a test. Horik had no doubt heard of the slave who had come from England, and of the other men who had been dragged here as well. It was obvious he wasn't just curious. He was taunting Athelstan.
So, of course, after just a few seconds, Athelstan answered him as appropriately as he could. "No," he said and shook his head.
Horik laughed. "Of course not! How could you be a Christian and walk among our gods?" He turned away from Athelstan, almost forgetting he was there as he lifted his gaze to Ragnar. "I share your appetite for new adventure, Ragnar Lothbrok, and I would gladly join forces with you, since as King, I'm naturally not in favor of individual enterprise by my earls or anyone else. And believe me, I would just be happy enough to have my name linked with yours when the poets tell the story of how we Norsemen sailed west and discovered new worlds."
Ragnar grinned his knowing grin, laying his hand over Athelstan's shoulder and almost thanking him for his knowledge. Athelstan just wanted to get away.
"Come!" Horik shouted happily. "Eat! Please."
They were directed back to a small set up where food and drinks were waiting, and even before he sat down, Athelstan fabricated a reason he needed to go.
"Earl Ragnar, King Horik, I must apologize, but I am needed elsewhere at the moment, so if you will excuse me," he said quickly and bowed before Ragnar could stop him.
As soon as he was outside, Athelstan pulled in the deepest breath he ever had, thankful for the morning air and the animals calling and the drums beating. He hurried away from the only other hut in this part of the grove, keeping his head down as he headed in the direction of the hut where he was sure Lilith and Gyda were probably still eating breakfast. He wanted to be in their presence right now. He was certain neither of them had known this, and therefore, he could trust them to not act so strangely as everyone else had been. He didn't want to be around anyone else right now.
Unfortunately, the path he decided to take from one side of the grove to the other led him directly in front of the temple. The priests still beat their drums and hummed their chants, and other than the little bells tinkling and the wind rustling through the leaves, it was silent. Then through the smoke, Athelstan saw the Seer standing at the top of the steps that led into the temple. He hadn't even known the Seer had come with them, much less climbed all the way up to the temple just to confer with the priests in the temple. But based on what Ragnar told him, the Seer had abilities that no mortal man possessed. So maybe he came here a different way.
Right now, he was gazing down at Athelstan expectantly, and there was no mistaking what his intention was. Somehow, Athelstan knew after everything he'd heard and seen.
It was time.
He climbed the steps slowly, looking around and noticing that it was just him coming to the temple. Would that mean he would do this alone?
The Seer waited until they were facing each other to speak. "Come," he demanded.
Athelstan did not hesitate, following the Seer into the temple. It still made Athelstan shiver upon entering, and the light still spilled out into the rafters of the building, fanning out behind the carved statue of Odin. No church he'd ever visited had ever made him feel this way. Those places had all invoked wonder and reverence and humility. This place just made him feel small.
"Have you come here of your own free will?"
The priest's voice startled him, but when he looked back at the entrance of the temple and discovered the Seer gone, Athelstan turned to face the priest as steadily as he could.
"I have," he answered.
The priest eyed him suspiciously, stepping closer to him. "I have sensed something from you from the first moment I saw you," he explained. "Something I had not felt in many years. You are not born of this land, and yet, you have embraced our culture. This is unusual. When I spoke to Earl Ragnar, he said there were two of you. A young girl who has been made the lawful daughter of Earl Ragnar. Is this true? Is it true that she bears the mark of your God upon her body?"
Athelstan clenched his jaw and then his fists, taking in a deep breath and pushing it out sharply. "Yes. It's true. And yes, she was marked by a man who claimed to be doing it in the name of his God."
"You care for this child," the priest stated plainly.
"I do," Athelstan nodded.
"You have raised this child."
Athelstan nodded again. "I have."
"And you will bind your soul with this child when she is a woman."
Athelstan shook his head. "What? No! I would never do that. Not now."
"That is not what has been prophesied." The priest paused, looking over Athelstan's face and then the rest of him before he spoke again. "I see it. And it is what will be. Do you know why you are here?"
Athelstan clenched his jaw again. "I do. I am meant to be a sacrifice at the end of the festival." He bowed his head, trying to hide his anger. "Even though no one told me about it, and they all smiled at me and got me drunk and filled me with magic mushrooms and tried to have me lay with a woman I barely know. And — I can't leave Lili," he whispered so softly he was sure no one else had heard him. "I can't leave her."
The priest stepped forward again, taking Athelstan by the shoulder and prompting him to lift his head so they were eye to eye. "I see life. I see death. I see you in between life and death. Your blood will not be your blood. It will be her blood. And therefore you cannot be sacrificed."
He let go of Athelstan and stepped away, bowing his head and signaling that it was over.
Athelstan stepped forward. "What does all of that mean?" he demanded. "Whose blood are you talking about?"
"It has been prophesied. You cannot be sacrificed. Now go!"
Confused, Athelstan left the temple, stepping back out into the light of day and finding the Seer on the steps of the temple. He didn't look up to see Athelstan there, but he rose all the same and moved up the steps to the temple.
"Wait here," he instructed as he walked passed Athelstan.
When the Seer didn't come back after a few minutes, Athelstan sat down on the steps, thinking of what the priest had said and not understanding even a little. How could he ever be between life and death? How could his blood not be his blood? And what blood would hers? Who was she?
People kept wandering around the grove as the minutes became an hour, and then an hour became two. Athelstan pulled his legs up to his chest, the words of the priest circling around his head, and he wrapped his arms around his legs, laying his head over his knees. He realized after another hour that what the priest said didn't matter. Ragnar had chosen Athelstan to be sacrificed, and it didn't matter why. For himself. For his family, his friends. And he had chosen not to say anything. It would have been so simple. Why had nothing been said?
It was almost dark when the Seer finally came out of the temple, and by then, Athelstan had almost fallen asleep. For a split second when he opened his eyes, he saw her there knelt in front of him. The woman in his dreams. Her white dress was still pristine despite running around the grove, and her golden brown eyes were as clear as a spring morning. She reached for his face, almost touching him when the Seer spoke.
"I have conferred with the gods," the ancient man said, and they both looked up at him. "And it has been determined that you will not be sacrificed in their name. It seems that you have a greater purpose to fulfill. I will bring together our people, and we will all choose another to be sacrificed. Come."
Athelstan looked in front of him, but she was gone, as though she had disappeared on the smoke. Or maybe she hadn't been there at all. Or perhaps she had been there the whole time. He stood up with the Seer, dizzy from sitting down so long and stiff all over. He managed not to fall, and once he was steady, the Seer turned away and led him away from the temple. Athelstan followed him only because when he looked behind him, the willowy white dress he kept seeing drifted away toward the part of the grove where Lagertha was more than likely waiting with the girls and Bjorn.
It only took the Seer and Athelstan a few minutes to make it back to the hut where Lagertha had been staying with the girls. Ragnar was standing outside the hut, relaxed as he leaned against the post in front of the door. He said nothing to Athelstan or the Seer, watching them as they stepped into the hut. Lagertha was sitting at the table that had been pushed to the side of the main room, and Lilith and Gyda waited with her. As soon as they saw Athelstan, they hurried to him.
"You didn't come back last night," Gyda exclaimed as she held him.
"We were worried about you," Lilith cried.
"I'm all right now," he assured them. "But something's happened. So we all need to sit down, all right?"
He let go of Gyda, nudging her back to where Lagertha sat and holding Lilith beside him as he sat down.
Whatever was about to happen, he would do it with her by his side, just as she always had been.
Many times over the last several days, Lilith had known something strange had been happening around her. The journey here, the blessing, her bleeding and now Gyda had begun her moon blood; it was all so strange. Since coming to this place and being with these people, Lilith had begun seeing everything as a sign of something happening.
When Lagertha had told her and Gyda, and by chance, Athelstan about the sacrifices that would happen at the end of the festival, it had felt like the events that had led her and Athelstan here were coming to a head. She knew something amazing was about to happen. The feasting and the music and the moaning had all culminated the night before, and this morning, the grove had been a different place. It had no longer been warm. Now it was cold, despite it being summer.
Lagertha had tried to keep her and Gyda busy, having them cook breakfast and then visit the vendors again, but this time to sell things rather than buying anything. They had stopped at another camp and eaten with a few of the women there, but none of those women interested Lilith. She had not seen Athelstan properly since arriving here, and the night before, he hadn't come back to the hut to sleep. Lilith knew he was a grown-up, and she knew he was allowed to do things she wasn't, even if he was still technically a slave. That didn't mean she had to like him being in a strange place with strange people who could hurt him whenever they wanted — the same way Helge and Egil had tried to hurt him and Edda.
Now that he was back, Lilith wasn't going to let him leave again. Even when Lagertha asked her to help Gyda and Bjorn arrange the benches so everyone could sit down when they arrived, Lilith watched Athelstan like a hawk, returning to his side when everyone else began to come back to the hut for this announcement the Seer was making.
First, Torstein and Arne came in, staggering a little but clearly sober as they sat down, and Siggy and Thyri came in after them. Leif and Rollo followed, and then Helga and Floki. Ragnar was the last one to come into the hut, gesturing for Athelstan to sit in front with him, and when Lilith came with him, he almost scowled at her before sitting down himself as the Seer stood over them all.
"I have come to tell you that the sacrifice of this man will not please the gods," the Seer said and gestured to Athelstan as he sat quietly with his head down.
Lilith looked up at the Seer. Did she hear that right? Athelstan was going to be sacrificed? That could not be right. She looked at him, still holding his hand and leaning closer so he would look at her.
"It's all right, Lili," he whispered. "Just wait."
He was so calm. It had to be true. Lilith didn't know whether to be confused or angry. How did he know?
"The sacrifice of this man will not only anger the gods," the Seer continued without acknowledging Lilith's glare, "but it also will disrupt a Greater Fate he has been given by the Æsir. I have conferred with the gods and the priests in the temple, and it is done. It cannot be undone. Therefore if you do not wish to endure the consequence of this, one amongst you must take his place at the ceremony, and you must hope that it is acceptable to the gods for all our sake."
The inside of the hut stayed quiet as they all sat close together. A minute passed before Ragnar sat up and looked around, laying his hand over Athelstan's shoulder.
"I ask you, Ancient One, what fate could a slave possibly have that is more important than any of ours here in Midgard?"
Athelstan gripped Lilith's hand so tight that his knuckles turned white, and he glared at Ragnar, clenching his teeth as the Seer responded to Ragnar's question.
"It is not for me or you to determine anyone's fate, Ragnar Lothbrok. You know more than I that we are all only here to do the gods' bidding. They have a plan and a path for us all, and so too a Fate for this foreigner who is still learning our ways. Now," he said and looked at everyone else.
It was so quiet after that, only the sound of the crackling fire filled the air around them. Lilith looked back at Lagertha and Gyda, uncertain what to do. Lilith's eyes found Helga and then Leif, wondering quietly. How could anyone be asked to make a choice like this? Had they known that Athelstan was to be the one sacrificed?
Leif looked away and then Lilith did, holding Athelstan's hand and lifting her other hand to his arm to comfort him. A seat behind them creaked, and they both looked back to see Leif stand up when no one else would.
"Before anyone can claim this honor," he began, "I desire to be sacrificed. If it is the will of the gods that Athelstan be spared, then I will gladly take his place. For my family and for all of you. My friends, and for everyone in Midgard. I trust the gods will find my sacrifice acceptable, and in that way, I do so of my own free will."
Lilith looked up at Athelstan, watching the anger on his face fade slowly. She couldn't tell if he was surprised at all, but she was. No one else spoke in response to Leif's announcement, not even when the Seer smiled with acceptance.
Now Lilith was confused. What did this mean? Athelstan would not be sacrificed as the Seer said, but instead, Leif would be sent to the altar to die? Was that really how it was here? What kind of place had they been brought to where people offered up their own family and friends as sacrifices to the gods?
Lilith understood that Athelstan was going to stay with them, but that meant that Leif wouldn't be going back with them. She looked back at him, not wanting to leave Athelstan's side but also not wanting Leif to leave.
"Leif," she called, rising from Athelstan's side and hurrying to her friend. "Where are you going?"
No one moved to stop her, not even when Leif turned to her and lay his hand over her shoulder.
"It is time for me to go, Dear One," he said, his voice so soft. "The gods are calling me to them, and I must answer them."
"But I don't want you to go," she cried, hating that she sounded so small.
Athelstan began to rise to comfort her, but Lagertha stood instead. She hurried to Lilith's side, taking her in her arms and sitting down so Leif could kneel in front of them both.
"Leif is doing this for all of us, Lilith," Lagertha whispered. "Even Athelstan."
"But why?" Lilith demanded.
Leif took both Lilith's hands in his as gently as he ever had, smiling sadly. "I know you are still so young, and so new to our way of life, but one day, I hope you understand this. When the gods demand a sacrifice, we must do as they say. I am doing this for you, Dear One. Because you are my good friend. And I am doing this for Athelstan, because he is also my friend. So that both of you may keep each other and protect one another. Yes?"
Lilith glanced back at Athelstan, seeing him no longer calm as he sat next to Ragnar. He had become anxious and tried to stand up even when Ragnar kept him sitting down. Lilith remembered what Lagertha had said about the sacrifices days earlier, and she knew from the few she'd seen what was involved. She understood that part. She probably understood more than anyone else. The marks on her backside were evidence enough of that.
"Lilith, my daughter," Lagertha said and stoked her hair gently. "Leif has to go now. But he will be smiling down at you from Valhalla for the rest of your life. I promise. And you will have all of us to protect you and love you."
Without hesitating, Lilith moved forward and wrapped her arms around Leif, trying her best not to cry and failing when he claimed the back of her head and then leaned back to kiss the side of her face. He reached into his beard then, unfurling the beads in his unruly hair and presenting them to her.
"These were given to me by my mother, when I was about your age," he said and lay them in her palm before closing his hand around them. "They are all I have left in this world that means anything to me, and I want you to have them. Lagertha will help you to put them in your own hair. So I will always be with you."
Lilith looked at the beads and then Lagertha, who nodded and wrapped her hand around Lilith's. She looked at Leif and nodded too, holding in her tears as she glanced at Athelstan and nodded. Leif looked at Lilith again and gently took her face in his hands, leaning forward to kiss her lips lightly before he rose and glanced at everyone else in the hut. With one nod, he left, the Seer went with him.
Barely a minute passed before Lilith left Lagertha's arms, hurrying back to the front where Athelstan still sat. He caught her as she fell into his arms, holding her against him and whispering to her.
"It's all right," he reassured her, cradling her gently. "I'm here. I'm right here. You're safe. I'm not going anywhere. I promise."
She clung to him like she never had. It wasn't enough that he was holding her and reassuring her. She wanted him away from his place, where it seemed like everyone had conspired to take him away from her. She had hated the last person who had done that. Lilith didn't want to hate Lagertha and Ragnar.
Ragnar tried to comfort her as well, almost touching her and then stopping when Athelstan turned his head in Ragnar's direction. No words were spoken, but enough was said.
Slowly, one person at a time, the inside the hut emptied until only Ragnar and Lagertha remained with Athelstan and their children. It stayed quiet as Lagertha stood from where she's sat and moved to kneel in front of Lilith and Athelstan.
"Lilith, my dear, look at me."
Slowly, Athelstan let go of her, allowing her to sit forward.
Lagertha took her hands as securely as she could without appearing hesitant. "The sacrifices will be tomorrow evening, before twilight. I know you are confused, and I know you are sad, but we must be there for Leif. Can you do that?"
For a few seconds, Lilith couldn't speak. She stared at Lagertha and wondered. "Did you know?" she asked out loud.
Lagertha looked at Athelstan and then at Gyda, sighing softly. "I did," she admitted. "But you must understand — "
"I understand," Lilith snapped, rising and taking her hands from Lagertha's. "I understand better than you do. And of course, I will be there for Leif. It is the least I can do, since no one was there for Athelstan."
Before anyone could stop her, Lilith ran away, out of the hut and into the grove. No longer was it a happy place, with people celebrating and dancing and singing. Now it was a sad place, where people were mourning and praying and crying. Lilith didn't like this place anymore. It no longer interested her the way it had when they had arrived. Now all she wanted to do was leave.
"Lili!"
Athelstan's voice cut through the low hum of praying, and Lilith turned to see him hurrying toward her.
"Did you know?" she demanded before he could grab hold of her.
"No! Of course not. Not until last night. And the Seer had me waiting at the temple all day. I didn't know what to say when I saw you, so I figured when he told them all, it would be over with. But — Lili, please, I'm sorry."
"So now, Leif has to die?" she cried. "He has to die for you, and for me. And why? Athelstan! Why?!"
He clamped his hands around her arms and pulled her into his, pressing her to his chest and cradling her head. "I don't know why," he whispered as she sobbed against his chest. "I am so sorry this is happening. I wish it didn't have to happen like this. But Lili, it's not safe out here. Let me take you somewhere safe."
She didn't fight him, allowing him to walk her away from the grove. First, she thought he was taking her back to the hut, but then he walked passed it and showed her to a little tent off by itself. She found herself cold as she sat inside, and he used the dying embers of the small fire to start a new blaze before reaching for her.
It was warm inside Athelstan's arms, as it always had been, but her anger had not subsided, as he discovered when the grip she had on his arm tightened to the point of causing him pain.
"Lili, calm down," he pleaded. "You're all right. Everything will be all right. I swear. And you don't have to watch the sacrifices tomorrow. No matter what Ragnar or Lagertha say. It's not our custom, so you don't have to observe it."
She loosed her hold on his arm, laying her head over his shoulder as she gazed into the small fire. "And what will people say if I do not go?" she wondered, clenching her teeth.
"I don't know," he conceded. "Does it matter?"
"I am the lawful daughter of Earl Ragnar. If I do not go, people will question whether I deserve to be called that. Because I come from somewhere else."
Quickly, he pushed her back, lifting her chin so she had to look at him. "Lili, listen to me, please. You are Ragnar's daughter. By law and by love. He loves you, and so does Lagertha. No one will ever question that. Never."
"If they love me, then why did they want to take you from me?" she demanded.
He sighed and bowed his head. "I don't know. I know we are both still learning about this place, and I wish I had a better answer for you. But it's all right, Lili. I'm here, and I'm not leaving you. I won't ever leave you."
For almost a second, it looked like he was going to kiss her like Leif had, and Lilith wondered why she would think that. Instead, he pulled her into his arm and lay down with her inside them, pressing his cheek to hers and almost willing her to fall asleep. But she couldn't. There was still one thing she had to know.
"Who was it?" she asked.
"Who was what?"
She turned her head in his direction without looking at him. "Who told you about the sacrifice? Who told you it was going to be you?"
He sighed against the back of her head. "It was Thyri. She came to get me and prepare me for the ceremony, and she told me."
Lilith had to press down the swell of fury that rose up inside her, and she realized she had heard them talking the night before. She had known all along that she couldn't trust Thyri, and now it seemed like her distrust had been proven. And even if Lilith was so young, she knew she would trust her instincts the next time she felt them telling her what to trust and not trust.
"I want to be there for Leif," she said softly. "He's my friend. And he would do the same for you."
For half a minute, he didn't speak. "I know," he said after being silent.
Lilith tried to relax after that, closing her eyes and thinking of Leif. He had looked so happy. For him, she would watch the sacrifices. She had attended a few in Kattegat. How different could it be?
I read quite a few things online that were posted around the end of season one that said Athelstan wouldn't have been upset, and I guess that would have been true to some degree. But like I said, Lilith's presence changed everything. Let me know what you think.
Also, while I will be editing the upcoming chapters over the next several days since I won't be working, I may try to post the next chapter on Wednesday. If not, consider this an early Christmas present to everyone who is celebrating.
Otherwise, everybody have a great weekend!