Austin sat beside Sam and wrapped an arm around him.
"I need her," Sam said quietly, wiping at his eyes. "I love him and I know it would hurt like hell if we lost him. But... I need her. Does that make me a horrible person?"
"No, mate. It just makes you a man who's in love with his wife," Austin told him as he rubbed his back.
Quinn made her way to the waiting room when she spotted Sam. "How are they?"
Sam just stared at the floor.
"Not very well," Austin answered. "They're delivering the baby right now."
"And I'm not even there to see it," Sam croaked out. "I might lose my wife, my son, and I won't even be there to see him be born."
Quinn sat next to him. "Stop that! You stop talking like that. You are walking out this hospital with a son and your wife. If you want to be there, go, its your family don't trust them to anyone else but you "
"They're doing a C-section, Quinn. I can't just walk in there, it's a surgery!"
Quinn stood as a nurse walk to the nurses station. "Excuse me, I heard they were taking Mercedes Evans down to surgery is that true?" The nurse looked down and nodded.
"Yes they are prepping the OR now."
Quinn smiled. "Good, her husband wants to be there."
"Ma'am I don't think-I"
"You know what I don't think? I don't think if something bad happens to that baby and his father isn't there to see, you want to know how much and how fast we will sue you."
The nurse picked up the phone and after a minute looked at Sam. "Mr. Evans,if you will follow me."
Sam stood slowly and gave Quinn's arm a gentle squeeze. "Thank you," he whispered before following the nurse to change into scrubs.
By the time the nurse Lead Sam into the room, everything was prepared. Dr. Ramsey looked at Sam. "I want you to stay up there, behind the drape until I tell you it's time to cut the cord okay?"
Sam nodded in understanding and went to Mercedes' head, crouching down to be close to her. "We're about to have our son, baby," he whispered, hoping she could hear him somehow. "You're gonna be the best mom there ever was."
Within fifteen minutes of starting, Dr. Ramsey looked up to Sam and the nurse handed him the scissors. "You ready to cut?"
Sam stood straight again and sucked in a breath at the sight of his son. He was so small, but still so perfect to him. His eyes filled with tears and he wiped them quickly before nodding and reaching out to take the scissors. He cut just as the doctor instructed and watched as they took Hayden away to check him.
A few moments later, Hayden's cries filled the room. Dr. Ramsey smiled. "He has got a healthy set of lungs there."
Sam's hand came up to cover his mouth to keep him from openly sobbing. He didn't even know it was possible to feel this many emotions all at once. His fingers brushed gently through Mercedes' hair. "Gets those from his mama."
Beeping suddenly started and Dr. Ramsey looked at the Nurse. Get him and Mr. Evans to the NICU." She moved to work on Mercedes as the nurse took Sam's hand. "Let's go."
Sam knew he couldn't stay no matter how much he wanted to be with her, but he looked at her one more time as he was taken out of the room. "I love you," he whispered, saying a quick prayer before he turned his attention back to Hayden.
In the NICU they cleaned Hayden up and checked for any signs of distress, after a few minutes the nurse smiled. "Are you ready to meet your son?"
Sam sniffled and nodded. "Please. Can I hold him?"
"Of course." Hayden was wrapped in a blanket with a small hat on his head. She handed him over.
Sam was as careful as he'd ever been with anything. Hayden looked so fragile and all he wanted to do in the world is to protect him. "Hello, Hayden. I'm your dad. I know... you were expecting your mom," he said, his voice cracking on the last word. "And I promise you'll get to see her real soon, okay? Oh, you're just perfect."
Dr. Ramsey made her way to the NICU about an hour later looking for Sam, she found him cuddled with Hayden. "Being a dad looks good on you."
Sam had texted his father and told them to come down to the hospital, but he was still soaking up every minute he could with his son. "I didn't know it was possible to love someone so completely so quickly," he said before he looked up at her. "Please tell me she's okay."
Dr. Ramsey nodded. "Her blood pressure dropped once we delivered the baby. Its common. We were able to close her up and get her stable. She isn't awake yet but we are hopeful."
Sam stood carefully and placed Hayden back in his little warming chamber. "Can I see her? Please?" he asked. "And is it okay if my dad and my sister come back to sit with Hayden?"
She nodded. "Yes they can stay here with him and I will take you to Mercedes."
Sam nodded and turned back to Hayden. He slid his hand in and stuck a finger under Hayden's tiny hand. "I'm gonna go check on your mama now, but your papa is gonna come sit with you. And I'll be right back, buddy, I promise."
Dr. Ramsey nodded at Dwight and Stacey as they entered. She looks at them. "So Hayden is 4lbs and about 14 inches long. He is doing very well so if you want to hold him you can."
"Thank you, doctor." Dwight gave her a nod, stopping to hug Sam. "Give Mercedes our love."
"Thanks, Dad." Sam gave a little wave to Hayden before following the doctor out.
Dr. Ramsey lead Sam to Mercedes room. "Let me know if you need anything."
"Thank you," Sam said again, walking over to the side of Mercedes' bed. He brushed her hair gently from her face. "My beautiful girl. You gotta come back to me so you can see our boy. He's perfect. And he needs you. We both do."
The room was dark, her throat felt raw and she was sore all over. Mercedes tried to sit up but felt a sharp pain in her stomach. Her hand went to it and it felt smaller. Feeling around for Hayden she screamed hoarsely. "Oh my God my baby. What happened to him?"
Sam had been sitting beside her bed for awhile, going to check on Hayden now and then, but his father was happy to stay with his brand new grandson. He had half dozed off when he heard Mercedes and jumped out of his chair and went to her side. "It's okay, baby. He's okay. He's alright. Take a deep breath." He wrapped his arms around her and drew her against his chest, tears springing to his eyes just to see her awake again. "Everything's okay."
Mercedes heard Sam. Eyes wide as he spoke. "He's okay? Where is he?" Sam hugged him. "Sam what's going on?"
"He is. They had to do a C-section," Sam explained quietly, rubbing her arm in a calming manner. "He's in the NICU, but he's a strong little guy and he's doing really good. My dad's with him right now."
Mercedes shook her head. "That doesn't...when? What happened?"
"The doctor can probably explain better than I can, but basically the baby was causing your blood pressure to go up really high and you had a seizure," he explained as well as he could. "And they had to take him out to make sure you'd be safe."
Mercedes took in everything Sam had to say and tried to come to terms with it all. "So he's really okay? Nothing wrong with him?"
"He's still really small and they ended up having to put a feeding tube in cause he wasn't quite strong enough to... suckle, I guess," Sam told her. "But his lungs and heart are in good condition, which are the most important things for the time being. He'll need to stay here awhile, but he's gonna be good, baby, I promise."
Mercedes nodded. She was worried but she trusted Sam and if he said the baby was fine then he was fine. "How long was I out?"
Sam lifted his wrist up to check his watch. "Well, damn, it's 3 a.m. The time's just kinda blended together," he realized. He turned and pressed his lips to her head. "You gave me a scare, Cedes."
Mercedes took a deep breath really taking in Sam's appearance. "I'm sorry Sam. I didn't mean too."
"It's okay, baby. You're here now. You're with me." He was saying it out loud as much for himself as he was for her. "That's all that matters."
Mercedes sighed as the door opened. Dr. Ramsey walked in with a smile. "Well. You gave us a fright. How are you feeling?"
Mercedes laid on Sam's arm. "I'm a little confused and in a lot of pain."
Dr. Ramsey nodded. "That's to be expected. I'm gonna up your morphine and if you are up to it, we will let you see Hayden."
"He's been asking for you," Sam told her with a soft smile.
Mercedes nodded. "I would love to see him. I can't really sit up though."
"That's okay, we can help you up into a wheelchair when you are up for it."
Mercedes nodded. "Okay, well I am ready now."
"Can't keep a mama away from her baby," Sam said with a shrug. He helped the nurse get her into the wheelchair when they brought it in.
Austin was sitting in a chair, making faces at Hayden, when they came in. "There's our girl. Sent your Dad home to get some sleep."
Mercedes was grateful they were able to help her get to the NICU. Seeing Austin she smiled slightly. "How are Dad and Stacey doing?" She asked but the moment she saw Hayden her words left and tears welled up in her eyes. "Oh Sam he's perfect."
"They're fine," was all Austin got out before all her attention was diverted and he got up to give her room. He laid a hand on Sam's shoulder. "Got Mary and Stevie a flight out first thing in the morning."
"Thank you." Sam gave Austin a quick hug before moving to pick Hayden up carefully and lay him in Mercedes' arms. "There's mama you've been waiting for."
Mercedes held her hands out and smiled so wide when she held him. "Oh my...perfect." She said tears in her eyes. She didn't move much due to the pain but holding Hayden was perfect it took all the pain away. "Sam look at what we did."
Sam couldn't take his eyes off of them. He didn't think he'd ever experienced this much love at one time. He couldn't have even imagined it was possible. Sniffling, he nodded as she spoke. "I know," he choked out through a smile. Pulling his phone out, he finally took a picture of his family together.
"Oh baby you just had to come out early didn't you?" She sniffled. "I don't think I can let him go...I know we have too but I just want to hold him forever."
"We have our whole lives to hold him," Sam assured her. "Or, you know, at least until he turns 12 and wants nothing to do with us anymore."
"Don't even joke about that!" She said softly but firmly.
Sam just chuckled, sitting in the seat Austin had left. "There's no getting around it, babe. Someday he will become a teenager. So I say we soak up every moment we've got."
Mercedes nodded holding onto Hayden as he slept in her arms. "I love you Hayden Samuel Evans."
Sam couldn't stop smiling. As terrifying as this day had been, he had his family now. They were here and they were safe. "And I love both of you. So much." He leaned forward and carefully over Hayden to kiss Mercedes.
Mercedes accepted his kiss. She moved closer to him but stopped in pain. "I think I am ready for that morphine now."
"Stay put," he instructed. "I'll find a nurse and have them put it in your IV."
"Ok." When Sam left she looked at Austin. "Is he okay? I'm not sure what happened but I know it wasn't good."
Austin looked up from his phone and moved to sit across from her. "It's been a rough night for all of us," he admitted, letting out a sigh. "Things were touch and go for awhile. They told him he might have to make some decisions that... nobody ever wants to be asked to make. But by the grace of God, nobody had to make them."
Mercedes looked down to Hayden. "I get he hasn't eaten anything either has he?"
"I haven't been with him every second, but probably not," Austin admitted. "He's just been going back and forth between here and your room."
She nodded. "I feel like I let him, let them both down with all this."
Austin tilted his head and looked at her. "Really? It's a disease, Cedes. Not something you can just work your way out of," he pointed out. "Maybe concentrate on the fact that you have a husband who loves you more than anything in the world and a beautiful son instead of putting yourself down over something you had no control over."
She looked up at him and shook her head. She didn't want to fight, so she kept her thoughts to herself.
Sam reappeared and leaned down to kiss the top of his wife's head. "She'll be here soon."
"Could I talk to you for a minute, mate?" Austin requested as he stood up, nodding his head to let him know he'd like it to be in private.
"Um... sure. I'll be right back, babe."
Mercedes nodded. "We will be here." She said looking down at Hayden.
Sam returned a few minutes later, sitting in the chair across from Mercedes. He could watch her hold their son forever and be happy. "I know how hard it is to let him go, but you should get some sleep too."
Mercedes shook her head. "I'm okay." She looked up to Sam. "What's going on with Austin?"
Sam nodded slowly. She was as stubborn as he was himself and he knew it. "He just wanted to check in. He's worried about us, you know? It's been a hard day. Hard couple weeks."
Mercedes didnt say anything just sat back holding Hayden. The nurse came in. "Time for mommy to get some rest ".
Mercedes frowned. "I'm actually good."
Nurse shook her head. "Doctors orders.
"He needs you to be your healthiest so you can take care of him, baby," Sam told her, resting a hand on her leg. He stepped to the side with the nurse and quietly asked her if the doctor was still around so he could talk to her.
Mercedes sighed. "I promise I will go rest a bit but I will be back." She damn near started crying when he was but back. She held herself as they were wheeled back in the room and Dr. Ramsey joined them. "Just wanted to check on the mama see how she's doing..are you okay?
Mercedes sighed. "Between leaving the baby and the pain...its just a lot."
Sam rubbed Mercedes' shoulder gently. "That's why some sleep will help, love. And you know I'll watch out for Hayden." Of course, he was going on 24 hours without any real sleep himself, but that was neither here nor there.
Mercedes let them help her I to the bed. "Dr. Ramsey can you tell him to practice what he preaches." She said sighing.
Dr. Ramsey nodded. "How about I let the nurse set you up and I talk to Sam about just that." She pulled Sam out of the room and looked at him. "Heard you wanted to see me?"
Sam nodded, rubbing at the back of his neck. "This has been a lot. For all of us, but her especially. And even before today she's just been constantly blaming herself for everything that happens and she still is," he told her with a sigh. "And she's been so argumentative. And the stress has been getting to me too, I won't deny that. Anyway, it's not how I wanna start this family. So I was wondering if maybe you could recommend someone that we could... you know, talk to?"
Dr. Ramsey nodded. "I understand what you are saying and sometimes just having the baby can clear these things up. And sometimes they are the start of a bigger picture. I can tell you that pulling a woman who just went through what she did into counseling without talking to her may cause more problems then you are ready to face. There is a real chance she could experience Postpartum depression, which is something I was going to tell you to look out for." She sighed. "I know you want to jump into fixing it but she may not think it needs to he fixed. Just be patient. Not even married a year and now with a child a lot is changing you just have to show her you are there."
"I wouldn't have done it without talking to her," Sam insisted, shaking his head. "I just know now isn't the best time to be doing that." He rested his hands on his hips and looked down at the floor, closing his eyes for a moment. "We were arguing. And I left her in our room 'cause... I just couldn't deal with it anymore. And then I found her like that."
"Sam things happen that are out of our control. You couldn't have known this would happen." She patted his shoulder. "Sam right now just focus on your family, the rest will come to you."
"I'm trying. I've been trying," Sam insisted. "She thinks I'm cheating on her. She thinks she's failing at being a mother already." He ran a hand over his face and sucked in a breath. "I'm gonna go sit with Hayden."
"Sam want some advice? Sit with your wife. Talk to her. Not about that but just talk to her because the more you avoid it the worse it will be."
"How many times can I say the same thing and not have her believe a word I say?" Sam chuckled sadly. "I sent everyone else home. There's no one to stay with Hayden right now."
"Well if it makes you feel better shes just mom now not a hormonal driven crazy woman. Though let's be honest she's still hormonal just not as much." There are a team of nurses with him. I'm not here to tell you what to do so you do what you feel is best. I will be here to check on your wife."
Sam nodded and leaned back against the wall once she left. The problem was now he got to find out if she really believed everything she'd been accusing him of. And if she did, what the hell that meant for them. He wiped at his eyes and took a breath before walking into Mercedes' room, tired smile plastered on his face.
"Baby...you really need some sleep you look as tired as I feel."
Sam just shrugged, taking a seat beside the bed again and laying his hand on hers. "Maybe I'll run home and take a nap in the morning when the family gets here," he told her, rubbing his thumb back and forth gently. "You're the one who needs to heal up though, okay?"
"Hayden needs you healthy too. Please just try. " she nodded. "I'm healing, got the morphine for pain and something that will help me sleep."
"Good. Good." Sam lifted her hand to his lips and held it there for a moment before he leaned back in the chair. "Get some rest."
She nodded. "I love you Sam."
"Love you too." He propped his head up on his hand and watched her, slightly afraid if someone wasn't watching her she might slip away again. The nurses were sending him regular updates and photos of Hayden to appease him and he made a mental note to buy them all thank you gifts before Hayden came home.
He could do this. He would do this, whatever needed to be done.
"Sam?" She turned towards him. "Can I ask you something?"
Sam startled slightly, lost in exhausted thought, and blinked a couple times. "Of course."
"Can you lay with me till I fall asleep?"
"Oh... yeah." Sam got into the bed carefully, moving her IV line over to the side so he wouldn't lay on it. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and let her tuck her head against his chest.
"The only thing that could be better than this is if Hayden was here." She said softly.
"Soon," Sam promised her quietly. "Soon you'll both be coming home and we can all cuddle together all the time."
She nodded yawning. Cuddling next to Sam gently she soon drifted off to sleep
Sam laid there for awhile, worry still eating at him and tears sneaking down his face every once in awhile. It was like all the fear he'd been ignoring all night could finally safely seep out of him until he finally dozed off.