Hello again, my dears. It's not much, but it's better than nothing...
I guess you've all been excited for the arrival at Evenfall, at least I have been:)
We don't know a lot about Lord Selwyn, but I'd say we couldn't expect it to go completely without a little drama, could we?
Oh, and as you might have noticed I like to use known scenes or phrases from the book or series, so I thought it might be interesting to take one or two here, but with reversed roles. I hope you'll agree with me that it just fit too perfectly not to smuggle it in.
So...if you could find a minute to tell me how you like the direction I'm taking, that would be very kind.
o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o
"The Kingslayer?"
Lord Selwyn Tarth's angry voice echoed from the walls of the Throne room, his cape blowing behind him as he strode up and down vigorously. His daughter's eyes followed him, no less in outrage, but aware that they were only going to shout at each other without getting anywhere, she forced her voice to stay controlled.
"Ser Jaime is-", she began, but he didn't let her speak.
"The Kingslayer?", he repeated, gesturing to the door in disbelieving fury. Brienne thanked the Seven that they had insisted on Jaime waiting outside, hopefully out of earshot.
"Brienne, are you out of your mind?"
"Father, please-"
"I haven't seen you in years", he interrupted her again, "and once I finally get you back, you have the nerve to arrive with this...this traitor!" He almost spat the last word at her and Brienne had to close her eyes for a second to stay calm.
"That's enough", she said, loud and firm, as she opened them again, watching how Lord Selwyn stopped abruptly in his pacing.
"What was that?" He turned towards her, slowly, almost threatening, but she didn't let herself be intimidated.
"I said, that's enough", she repeated unnecessarily, knowing that he had understood very well the first time. "Forgive me, father, but I won't let you talk about him in that way."
"The Kingslayer is not-"
"Will you stop that?", she burst out, unable to hold back any longer. "Call him by his name. Call him Jaime."
"The name you should be worried about is Lannister, Brienne", he pointed out. "That family- And he-" He broke off, apparently too dumbstruck to bring the sentence to an end.
Instead, his figure suddenly seemed to shrink, back and shoulders slumped a little and he sighed exhaustedly, slightly shaking his head.
"I would have expected more from you." Those words hit Brienne more than his anger, but she knew she couldn't yield now.
"Then I'm sorry to disappoint you", she simply replied instead, trying to swallow the lump in her throat. "Perhaps it was wrong to come back. I think it's best if we go."
She was ready to turn around, but a hand on her shoulder held her back.
"No! No Brienne, please", her father said, a hint of a plea in his voice that surprised her, "you're just back, I- I don't want you to go. You're needed here." She knew that. And she didn't want to leave either.
"But you want Jaime to go", she detected, no need for pretence. "That's enough reason for me."
"If I order him to leave, you will go too?", he asked, although he knew the answer.
"I will." She watched his face, switching between emotions, trying to decide how to react, and finally settling on the stubborn obstinacy she had inherited herself.
"I could force you to stay", he said coldly, although the thought that his only child would have to be bound at her home against her will hurt him more than he could say. "You have an obligation to Tarth."
Brienne looked at him challengingly.
"Would you really be willing to pay that price? To hold me by force?" She shook her head. "You know that I love you and I love Tarth, but...I love him too", she said softly, hoping that a look into her heart would make him see, would make him understand. But the eyes that met her radiated nothing but shock and disbelief.
"You can't be serious", he said, audibly trying to hold back the anger from returning. "Brienne, a man who murdered the one he had sworn to protect-"
"You don't know the whole story", she interrupted him, a battle of two equally stubborn minds.
"And you do?" He rose his eyebrows, a spark of amusement in his eyes that made it hard for her to control her voice.
"I do. He told me."
"Aaah." He smiled, shaking his head, pitying her ignorance. "And you chose to believe him."
"Wait." She lifted her hands in bewilderment. "You think he...lied to me?"
"As if a murderer would stop at a lie."
Brienne opened and closed her mouth, lost for words for a second, not believing her ears.
"What's this whole murderer nonsense?", she asked, stunned.
She didn't think it would be easy, making her father accept Jaime, but never would she have believed him to be like...this. Those arguments were ridiculous. Pathetic.
"I killed people too", she pointed out in exasperation, "And so have you."
"But for what reasons, child?"
"He had his reasons", she replied grimly. "And I'm not a child father, I can make my own decisions."
"Obviously." He met her challenging gaze no less fiercely. "You chose to bring him here without asking my permission, without even telling me."
"Because I feared that you would react just like this!", she countered, gesturing to him vigorously.
"What did you expect?", he shot back. "That I would be thrilled?"
"No!" Brienne lifted her hands desperately, trying to order the words in the agitated turmoil that was jer head. She hadn't expected him to be happy, not immediately. But she had expected him to try for her, she had expected...
"I expected you to listen!", she finally burst out, a bit shocked about her own hopelessly pleading voice. "Father, you know me. You raised me to be who I am today. Do you think I would have brought him if he wasn't worth it?"
His eyes had softened, but it was not the kind of look she had been hoping for.
"You have always had a good heart, Brienne", her father smiled a little sadly. "I know just too well how people like the Lannisters use that for their advantage."
"Jaime is not like that. You don't know him as I do", she replied, because she just didn't know what else she could have brought up that hadn't already been said. "That's why I brought him. Because I want you to. He would never hurt me", she added, her father's unhappy eyes piercing her heart.
"Brienne-"
"Please", she begged, stepping forward to get hold of his hands, squeezing them reassuringly. "I promise you'll understand if you try. If you only knew what I know-"
"Then tell me", he said and although she could finally, finally hear sincere willingness to listen in his voice, she had to shake her head.
"I can't", Brienne replied softly, but went on before he had the chance to contradict her again. "Not yet. It's not my story to tell", she explained, "At least not mine alone. You will hear it, I promise, but until then, you'll just have to trust me. Can you do that for me?"
She watched his doubtful features, could practically see the thoughts working behind his eyes...
Then the look in them finally softened, and she knew she had won when he sighed.
o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o
Jaime was nervous. It was ridiculous. He had won countless battles, against all odds had he survived the Army of the Dead, yet here he stood, trying to keep his heaving breath and trembling hands under control.
"Who's that?", Lord Selwyn Tarth had asked when he entered the Entrance Hall behind Brienne, only to be ordered outside again by her pleading eyes and her father's demanding voice. Actually, he was glad that he wasn't present in the conversation that followed. He could hear their words echoing through the stonewalls and down multiple corridors from time to time, but it was a relief that he didn't understand what they said.
He wasn't surprised. Naturally, he had hoped for a different welcome -in vain, like so many times before- but was he surprised? No.
At least he didn't have to listen. That was more than he had been granted by most since the fall of King Aerys II. At least he didn't have to stand by while the insults were thrown around. At least he had someone who defended him this time.
But waiting was another kind of torture. The inability to do anything, his fate being discussed a few rooms away, lying in the hands of others, without a chance to be influenced. All he could do was wait. And wait.
Then she came. Her father followed her, both with expressions impossible to read. He wanted to open his mouth, but Brienne shook her head almost imperceptibly and he closed it again. Without a word, she took his arm and lead him down the corridor. He let her drag him away without a word of complaint, her father's watchful eyes following them as they disappeared around a corner.
They didn't have much time before they would be summoned to dinner. Jaime started to speak as soon as the door of his chamber closed behind them, but Brienne stayed rather short.
"Give him time", she said. "He'll try. Just...be patient."
Jaime nodded. What choice did they have anyway?
It was difficult. The atmosphere was tensed, the silence tangible, only interrupted by the ticking of the clock in the Dining Hall and the cackling of cutlery on dishes.
Brienne's eyes flit from Jaime by her side to her father at the head of the table, nervously waiting for someone to break the pressing silence, but too afraid to do so herself. This was no unproblematic situation, and neither of those two men she knew better than any other in the world were simple, compliant characters. Her father had promised to be impartial, and Jaime wanted to leave a good impression anyway, but that was no guarantor that they wouldn't drive each other to say things they would regret afterwards. Only the Gods knew how this evening would turn out.
She noticed how her father watched Jaime in his failing attempt to cut his meat with one hand, Lord Selwyn's eyes sparkling with something Brienne didn't like at all. Amusement. Gloat, almost.
"Let me." Her voice was quiet, soft. Still, her words cut through the air like a sword.
Jaime had felt the other's eyes on him, had tried to ignore their gazes to the best of his ability, but when he looked up, her smile was genuine and loving. She didn't pity him, it was a simple gesture of kindness, an act of loyalty to save him from ridicule.
"Thank you."
She pulled his plate in her direction and as he watched her hands work, he felt a flashback of the same gratitude that had flooded through him all those years ago in Harrenhall. Only that it was her father raising his eyebrows at her now, not Lord Bolton.
"Bringing back memories, doesn't it?", she said as if she were able to read his thoughts, throwing a glance at Jaime, who hummed in confirmation.
"You two share a lot of memories, don't you?", Lord Selwyn joined in, just as Brienne had finished her task. "Even though our island might be a little isolated, there are certain stories that are carried to the last corners of Westeros." He paused, aware that a moment of silence could bear more meaning than a thousand words, and took a sip from his cup.
"Rumours of Saphhire mines, bears and swords", he went on. "I suppose I have to thank you for bringing my daughter safely home."
"In truth, she rescued me, Mylord", Jaime said calmly, his eyes resting on his face without a sign of intimidation. "More than once."
"Oh", Brienne heard her father's surprised voice as she tried to hide the smile that had stolen its way on her face by lowering her eyes to her lap. "I haven't heard that story before."
"Not such a fascinating story, I'm afraid", Jaime answered light-heartedly, obviously not needing any assistance in keeping up with the Lord of Tarth. Perhaps her worries had been needless. But her father, in all his apparent politeness, seemed to insist on showing his disapproval in other ways.
"I'm sure you have many fascinating stories to tell, have you not, Ser Jaime?"
Brienne heard the little smile in his voice, saw the slightly narrowed eyes without having to look at him. It was a threat, that simple question, and all three of them knew it.
"Father", she whispered with a warning glance at him, but Jaime soothed her by laying his hand on her arm.
"No, no, Bri, it's fine", he assured her. "Really." He looked at her expectantly, waiting for her consent, as it seemed, and although she didn't like the path her father had forced him to take, she could only admire him for his calmness and composure. So she nodded, allowing him to proceed as he saw fit, and Jaime smiled gratefully before he turned his attention back to the other man.
"I understand that you have questions, Lord Selwyn", he declared. "Every loving father would be suspicious. And it's true", he granted, "I have. Many fascinating stories, indeed. And we all know that some don't cast a good light on me. No need to pretend", he added in Brienne's direction as he could feel her stiffen beside him. "But I don't feel I should be the one to tell them", he continued. "I don't think it would be appropriate for me, as I don't want you -or me- to feel as if I were trying to justify myself. Instead", he said, quickly meeting Brienne's wide eyes for a second, "ask your daughter. She knows as much about me as anyone, in fact", he couldn't suppress a little smile, "she's the only person that knows everything. And I grant her full permission to reveal as much as she thinks necessary. That is, if you agree", he added to Brienne in her rather obvious perplexity. She opened her mouth a little puzzled, looking from Jaime to her father and back again, aware that both expected her to answer. She swallowed, focusing on Jaime's soft eyes to find the thread again.
"If that is how you want to do it", she said then and he blinked confirmatory. "Alright."
Her father nodded too. "Very well."
Another moment of silence, then Jaime suddenly rose from his chair and bowed a little.
"If you would excuse me then, Mylord, Mylady", he said politely. "It's been a long day. I'm sure I'll find my room on my own", he added when Brienne prepared to get up as well, stopping her in her move. "I believe you have a lot to discuss."