"I don't like it."
"No one asked you sweetie," Layla said, separating Victorias medication into the proper pill containers.
"But mama!" Victoria complained, "why can't i go too?!"
Ever since Lance had openly chosen to leave once everything was settled, Vic had just assumed that she'd be allowed to go as well. A table may or may not have been flipped when she had been told no.
"Because i would never force anyone outside these walls to handle your sweet disposition," Layla gave her the most motherly smile and patted her cheek.
"Har har," Vic pouted, "With Lance there i wouldn't be so 'sweet'."
"What will happen if you run out of medicine?" Layla asked, still as brightly as if they were discussing how many cups of flour to add to a recipe, "what happens when you have an episode or when things get far too dangerous?"
"What if Lance gets into all those dangerous situations without me there to watch his back?!"
"I thought you liked the others?"
"…i do…but i prefer to watch with my own eyes…"
"mmm," Layla took her daughters head in her hands and brushed back her hair. Kissing the girl lovingly on the forehead she drew back, and with all the love in the galaxy said, "no."
()
It was Keith who discovered the almost invisible writing on the back of the confettie picture. The largest piece had "Rule 34" written on it, in what looked like very sloppy pencil. Allura tried to use the feint pencil strokes to piece the hologram together. Highlighting the markings from the scan she had taken of the picture pieces.
When she was done they could only make out a few "rules":
*If your hand shakes, don't hold the knife *don't talk, - don't- don't breathe don't talk -t breathe *is rule 34 a lie? -s-rd * Souls exist *Peoples last breath smells different *pressure points can go numb- funny *Rule 34 is a lie *stu-su-ess *fishing can be fun *don't take Paul fishing *Mary and Shalott are fun to watch *Paul is 'dad' not 'papa', those are not the same * "Flying is Freedom" – Shirog-Taka-iShiro raised an eyebrow at that one. when had he said that?
"So this is why he wanted it," Allura sighed, finally able to understand what the big deal was, "he wanted…whatever list this is."
"Probably kept him sane, but," Pidge tilted her head, "if he kept this and added to it, then were is all the stuff about us?"
"I think he may have stopped writing this after he got into the garrison," Keith said, "I mean, this is kind of silly."
"I'm going to search his room again~" Pidge said backing away slowly.
"No, don't," Shiro put a hand on her shoulder, "let him have some kind of privacy."
()
The paladins, despite their needing to leave, dragged their feet as Lance slowly got his memories back. It was little by little and his speech was getting better; though they noticed he didn't talk quite as much as he did before. If he messed up and got something wrong they could guarantee that he'd not speak for the rest of the day.
He spent a week with his lion, only coming out to eat, and then going back. What he did was anyone's guess, but he did seem happier when he rejoined them.
They mostly stayed at the garrison, but made daily trips to the Mcclain house. Once Paul was released from the hospital he encouraged everyone to come over more often. Paul was a party man at heart and his energy was infectious.
So infectious, that for those few days, Lance acted more like himself than he had in a long while.
"We now know where he heard all those really bad jokes," Shiro said one evening, helping Layla clean up. Paul and all five kids were passed out on the living room floor. The snoring chorus was enough to shatter a window.
"Paul never was the really funny one, no matter how hard he tries," Layla chuckled, "the effort he puts in is what makes it funny."
"I'm glad everything turned out…well…better than it could…" Shiro bit his lip as he tried to find words to make what had come out disappear.
"I'm glad as well," Layla replied, understanding his intent, "we all knew that man would be let out of prison eventually. We just hoped he'd live his life down there and forget about us. I underestimated his scorn…and the scorn no doubt fed by his family and our little town."
"But its over now?"
"Yes," She nodded with a small smile, "Its odd, because i did love him, you know. I wished and prayed for his death. And then it finally happened, it was like a part of me died…no, it was like i could let go. I never would let Lance run off to the other side of the country, let alone the galaxy."
"You've got a strong group of kids," Shiro nodded.
"I do," Layla said proudly, "You realize we'll have to lock Victoria up while you guys leave or she'll find a way to sneak aboard."
"I figured," Shiro nodded. It had been evident when he'd entered the house and found Victoria hanging off the back of the couch, stabbing the wall with a pen and glaring up at him as he walked toward the kitchen. Her eyes had that crazed 'i'll do what i want' look to them.
"I want all of you to hurry back and be safe," she said wiping her hands on her apron, "I'll not have a single one of you not coming home, no excuses."
"Yes, ma'am," Shiro said and fought the urge to salute. Layla could put iverson in his place if she had the mind to.
()
They had a date. Pidge, Shiro, and Hunk were finishing up with the garrison and after that, they all would say good-bye.
"Don't tell anyone," Keith said plopping down next to Lance and Victoria and looking around. They had been in the back yard weeding the garden together. The twins glanced at each others and turned similar faces to the red paladin.
"Mum," they said together.
"I have to know," Keith said, now wondering if the others were right and he should ask, "I'm Sorry, but i really can't, not, know-"
"Gads, Keith!" Lance rolled his eyes, "spill!"
"What's Rule 34?"
They blinked at him and Vic turned to her brother.
"Now its your turn to spill…cause i wanna know too."
Lance turned a little red.
"Its stupid," he shrugged, "just a superstition, really…nothing very important…really stupid..foolish….childish…how do you even know about that anyway?"
"Lance."
"…i mean, i don't believe that way now, but at the time it was just-"
"Lance!"
"Rule 34: To kill a monster you must first be a monster."
Keith scowled.
Victoria snorted, "Robert would spew that garbage all the time just to keep us in line."
Lance shrugged, "Its effective. You tell a child that they'll lose their humanity if they turn against you or don't do what they say. Course once we got older i realized how stupid it all was, but at the time…"
He let it hang and shrugged again. He didn't look bothered by it, only embarrassed that he'd believed it at all. He acted as though he'd just confessed to still believing in the Tooth Fairy.
"Glad we grew out of that," Vic sighed and Lance rolled his eyes again.
"Whatever, you believed in the curse more than i did."
"Nuhuh! if anything it was both of us!"
"Mmm, suuurrreee," Lance grinned and looked over at Keith as though he should join in on the teasing. But Keith didn't know what to say or do at this point. He was still mulling over Rule 34. He'd been so keen on finding out what it was, he didn't plan on what to do after he was told.
"How did you know about rule 34 anyway?"
"Allura was able to put together some of the pieces of your picture and I noticed that you wrote stuff on the back," Ketih said, "Don't tell the others I told you this, they think it might set you back."
"And you told me anyway? Gosh Keith, I don't know if you care or not."
"So, yeah…just, don't tell anyone i asked you," Keith stammered trying to get to his feet, but the twins pulled him back down.
"Shalott," Lance finally said, dusting off his hands, "I do believe i have been insulted."
"Indeed, Sir Lancelot," Vic said, sitting back and acting her role as a lady despite the dirt on her face, "i fear the other knights think thee week and simple."
"have i not shown them i have healed from the wounds of the beast?"
"Indeed."
"Have I neglected my duties?"
"Not a one."
"Have i shied away from the on coming storms?"
"I daresay you have not."
"Then why, Gawain am i treated thus? Am I to be pocked forever more?"
"I really hate both of you," Keith said shaking his head, "and you should talk to the others if you're really that insulted about it. They're only doing what they think is best, you know."
"Still," Vic said, still acting the lady, "to deny council to the one they force judgment upon is…rude…some may even go as far as to say' 'not cool'."
"I thought so," Lance nodded, "indeed this should be addressed before we quest. but I am want for a grand display. what say you, Shalott?"
"My, it has been too long, Lancelot," Vic fanned herself, flicking dirt from her gardening gloves, "in what manner can we pull off such a feat all. by. our. selves…"
They both turned their faces to Keith. A chill ran down his spine and he realized that he should've ran away a while ago-no, he should never have come in the first place.
()
Keith walked up to the Mcclain house the next evening with Shiro and Allura. The others would be coming by in a few hours. The two boys, Marco and Milo, seemed to have attached themselves to Keith in the last few days. When they got out of the car, the boys dropped the game they'd been playing and ran up to him. they petered him with questions about his day and un asked information about their own days.
He stayed and listened, not sure why they bothered. Marco looked more like Lance and Milo looked more like Paul, but Keith found it hard to believe that anyone related to Lance would like him.
"Boys!" Marry rode her bike up the drive way and scowled at them, "stop pestering Keith, I doubt he's interested in how much glue you can fit into an eraser!"
"BOSSY MARY!" They shouted at her, "BOSSY MARY!"
And then they ran off as she made to go after them. She clicked her tongue and put her hands on her hips. Turning her intense green eyes on Keith she said, "And you could tell them to leave you alone, you know. It wont kill them."
She stormed past him and entered the house. Keith shrugged and followed. He hadn't minded the chatter, more like he just wondered WHY any one would WANT to put glue in an eraser…
Shiro and Allura came out of the kitchen and met Mary in the living room and Keith joined them.
"Mom and dad are going to be a little late- they're making up for all the days they took off- so we're warming up some of Grammies pot-pies," Mary was filling them in, when the closet door flew open with a crash and the twins jumped out with unearthly wails and cries.
Keith, though he'd NEVER admit it, had his bayrad in hand before he realized that they were just the twins. Though it was comforting to know that Shiro also had reacted the same way.
Their yelling and laughter died really fast and they quickly got rid of the blankets and masks that they had used as costumes.
"Nonono, Mary, its ok," they said, reaching out for the stiffened child, "we're sorry. Its just us. We're sorry. Its ok."
Mary was stif as a board and fighting back tears as her bottom lip trembled. the twins cuddled her on either side and stroked her hair.
"Sorry, Mary, we won't do that again, promise," they said, "we didn't think you would be home yet."
"Weren't you gonna spend the night at Jannets today?"
Mary took a shuddering breath, "Jan's a whore!"
And she ran up the stairs, pushing the twins away. they watched her run off and Lance swore.
"our fault?"
"Most likely."
"What were you two doing?" Allura asked incredulously. Her heart was still jumping slightly, though it seemed silly that it should.
"Just a prank," Shiro sighed shaking his head, "but i'm surprised Mary reacted like that. She seems to be the most reasonable one in the family."
"She's got a good head on her shoulders," Vic nodded while Lance picked up their mess, "but underneath all that logic is actually the most superstitious person you'll ever meet."
"It doesn't help that she gets nightmares easily," Lance grimaced, "which means she'll be sleeping in our room tonight."
"I'll make the nest while you get dinner started?"
"yup." He handed her the pile of blankets and headed to the kitchen while she headed upstairs.
"Were you waiting there all day?"
"Puh-leez, Shiro," Lance rolled his eyes, "we waited till we could hear the garrison vehicle five streets away! Where are the others anyway, we thought all of you were getting off early today."
"Coran demanded an in depth and hands-on explanation on some tech or other," Keith said sitting at the table, "seems he's forgotten he's the one who said we have to leave quickly."
"Mmmm," Lance shrugged and pulled a stack of tin foiled personal pie tins from the freezer, "well, i'll cook their pies when they get back."
"Pie for dinner?" Allura asked, she hadn't heard any of the humans talk of this before.
"Its a meat pie," Lance said taking off the foil and showing the frozen crust that had a smiley face in the top, made by a spoon, "Made by our Grammie when she comes to visit. They don't visit often, so when they do, Grammie makes a ton of pot-pies for us to cook after she's gone. These truly are the best."
"Interesting," Allura said watching Lance place them on a cookie sheet and set the oven.
Victoria came in then and looked around with a frown, "Where's Hunk? And Pidge?"
Lance filled her in and she clicked her tongue as she sat next to keith. He scooted over to make room for her on the bench and she grinned at him. He scowled back.
()
It wasn't until two days later that they were all sitting around the table when Victoria gave Keith a good kick under the table.
They were playing a card game and eating fries (a snack they all had missed while in space). It was early afternoon and they would be leaving in two days.
Keith wanted to disappear.
"So, Lance," he said, not bothering to hide his irritation, "what is rule 34?"
The table went completely still, then Lance collapsed out of his seat and Vic screamed. Hunk and Shiro were on their feet and Pidge gave Keith a dirty look.
Lance flopped on the ground, ketchup dribbling out of his mouth and covered one hand as he smeared it all over his shirt.
"I am slain….dear sister…"
"Noooo!" Vic fell beside her brother in the best example of ham acting known to man, "you can't leave me!"
"…my…friends…think well of me…" Lance coughed, "tell…mother…that i didn't draw on the wall when we were five…."
"No actually, that was you," Vic said with a chuckle.
"…tell my fans….across the galaxy…that…that i …love…them…"
Dramatically he went limp and 'died'. vic made a show of sobbing and mourning.
the paladins and the Alteans had no idea how to react, except for Keith who rolled his eyes.
"I really, really, really, hate both of you."
"Lance, what are you doing?" Shiro asked slowly. Lance opened one eye and grinned.
"how was that?"
"What?"
Lance sat up and smiled up at them, "was that close to how you thought i'd react if you guys went and asked me questions? Was i close at all? As a true artist and professional, i demand honest feed back."
"Well…what-"
"You guys are practically family," Vic said, "if we didn't want you to know anything or if we were going to be touchy about it, we woulda kicked you out a long time ago or just not told you anything from the start."
"Seriously," Lance said clicking his tongue at them as if they were naughty children, "if you tip toe around me all the time i might as well just stay on earth!"
"Don't do that!" Allura and Pidge snapped while Hunk just looked like he'd sucked on a lemon.
"Point taken," Shiro said raising his hands in surrender, "we're sorry."
"You were in on this?" Coran asked Keith.
"They forced me to do it," he said, "remind me to NEVER ask them for favors, information, or in any way be in debt to them."
"We just needed you to kick it off," Vic said shaking her head at him, "stop being such a baby."
they glared at each other while Lance and the others talked.
()
Keith felt himself come out of sleep. The couch was oddly very comfortable. The house was so quiet and still. The night insects could be heard outside, but the house was silent.
So what woke him up?
His eyes popped open to find…
was it Lance or Victoria?
"You look better when you're asleep," Victoria said, "much less rage inducing."
"…do i even want to know…"
"You guys are leaving in a few hours," She said, "why you guys can't even wait til after breakfast is beyond me, but then, you all are pretty stupid."
Keith tried to turn around and go back to sleep.
"…i just wanted to say thank you for being Lance's friend."
"He hates my guts, so you can just thank everyone else," Keith yawned. Was she waking everyone else up like this too?
"Mmm…if he hated you he wouldn't bother to talk to you," Vic said casually, "good night."
He heard her bare feet pad across the floor and go up the stairs.
()
"Do you have everything you need?"
Layla was tugging a comb through Pidges hair and absent-mindedly started to pin parts of it back. they were all standing outside the ship while Coran, Hunks Father and Paul carried last minute supplies aboard.
"I packed you each a bag and all of you should be able to make do for a while. But this just assures you'll come back soon for a refill."
"We made some quick homemade freezer meals," Hunks mom said, "just in case you guys are in a hurry."
"We were supposed to leave two hours ago, mom," Lance sighed, "you're just giving Vic more time to pick the lock at home."
"Oh i did that a long time ago," Vic said making them all jump, "you can't get rid of me that easily."
she hung on Lance and he let her while her mother began to scold her.
"Calm down, mom," Vic said, "I know i have to stay, i won't leave. Someone has to stay and look after the kids. Jannet is going to get an ugly wake up call in about 45 minutes…"
"Ohhh, how bad?" Lance asked eagerly.
"She'll have a hard time sleeping for the next few weeks and be a 'good girl' for the rest of her life. If not, her family might just have to move to the next state over."
"Shame," Lance sighed dramatically.
"Indeed," Vic said reverently.
"Well, that's everything!" hunks father called putting an arm around his sons shoulders, "all is ready for you all to get going."
Everyone mingled to say their good-byes. Lance lingered in Pauls hug a little and Paul squeezed a little harder than usual.
"You come back!" Vic shouted wrapping her arms around hunks neck and planting a huge kiss on his cheek, "I like you the most!"
hunk was stunned and Pidge tried to explain that Hunk was already in a relationship with a rock.
()
Earth grew smaller and smaller.
Shiro found Lance on the observation deck and sat next to him. They sat in silence and watched as Kerboros came into view.
Without warning Lance grabbed him and buried his face into Shiros shoulder. He sobbed and cried while shaking. Taken aback, but not at all surprised, Shiro held onto him and waited.
They had been worried because he hadn't shown any release of emotion the entire time they'd been on earth, and they knew it had to happen some time. This was Lance, after all.
He would be fine.
Lance had everything he needed.
his family was well and safe.
His friends were safe and cared for him even when they knew about what a horrible person he was.
Everything was going to be ok.