First part of series: Obito, you dumb shit.
Follows canon to point of Rin's demise. Canon-divergent, introducting Obito's return to Konoha and the aftermath.
Obito-centric.
Platonish ObiRin, KakaObi.
Rated M for some adult themes.
Naruto doesn't belong to me.
Summary: Obito deals with state policy and his own sexual life.
Also, I'd love to thank everyone for positive feedback so far!
One man in Hokage office is so insignificant, Raven barely noticed him. Too small boot is tightly covering his bad leg, ROOT uniform so tight it makes his skin crawl. His gloved hands are positioning painted mask in his place. Shedding the skin of Obito and slipping back into Raven comes at ease. It's almost natural. Obito was a fool, a fool for years, failing to see the link between Minato and Danzo.
This man has mission in ROOT and source of persistent feeling something is terribly wrong.
Raven is on self-appointed mission.
This man, Raven doesn't even know his real name, died choking on his favourite mochi cake.
To reward himself for this and lighten his mood of unmistakenly lacking manhood, Obito gets himself a golden dildo.
Following days, Hound is suddenly gone on very important mission. Obito couldn't sleep, always having plenty of weird nightmares, spiralling into nothingness, over and over again. He hears footsteps on the snow, he feels searing burn of Chidori, he's buried under the rubble. Sometimes he has an overwhelming urge to ask Orochimaru for more stimulants, he wants- he needs to talk to Rin. Orochimaru told him they're non-additives, safe for use. Old snake had a lifetime of experiences more. Maybe he wants stimulants to have another spiritual, out-of-body experience. Instead, he crutches all the way downtown, to the cementery and the centograph.
He even visits this ugly 'Will of Fire' monument, where Iruka and other children used to sit during the classes. They do small talk, all insignificant daily tasks bullshit, the lessons are always similar, nothing has changed at all.
This dehumanizing system built on war is doing fine, death of one person isn't enough. He could end it, no matter how many lives it takes. Yet he haven't done a single thing. Maybe he already had his chance and wasted it, casting Madara's and Black Zetsu idea of perfect genjutsu aside? Maybe joining ANBU was a mistake and instead killing people he should become a turtor.
Preaching to young children about 'Will of Fire' and whatever now the Academy curriculum is? Sounds lame.
"Paying respects to the dead, Uchiha Obito?" an old man with a cane and bandaged head. Noble Councilman, Danzo Shimura. ROOT leader. He, who blackmailed Nono, tried to blackmail Hound several times. Two crutches against one cane. One leg against two. Mokuton against his Wind affinity. It's easy to tell, Danzo Shimura is never alone.
"Just wondering how many orphanage funds went on this one," Obito doesn't bow. He's leaning on his crutches, tired and disabled shinobi. "How much of these money could help ninjas disabled in combat. Though, I know you're not here to talk about charity."
"Maybe yes. Maybe I could offer you both something more, think about it. You and Hound have a quality called darkness."
Loud snort coming from Obito's parted, scarred lips makes Danzo narrow his visible eye at him. His braided hair swings when Obito shakes his head. Obito thinks about Hound forearm covered by scar tissue, about collateral damage, about orphans and himself, howling to the red moon, clinging to Rin's lifeless frame, cradling her body. About the liquid pleasure inside his veins, wild spiritual journey. About ghosts being real.
"I don't think so," he's tired, very tired man. His knuckles turn white from grasping the crutch handles. "Forging us into weapons and telling us to find peace. Don't approach us again," it's a warning. "If I find out you're trying to lure someone close to me into ROOT, then I'll come to you. Not in peace, though."
Danzo is amused. He's not surprised by the refusal. Personal recruitment to the ROOT is an honour, and there's plenty of other shinobi dreaming about becoming part of an ANBU, someone's personal guard. He dispatches his minions, such a shame. He had watched Yoritomo's downfall, who tried to challenge and unearth ROOT dirty doings.
"Your father was a noble man."
He leaves Obito alone by the fugly monument, and Yoritomo Uchiha is a dead man. Obito doesn't find his name in the stone. It never has been there to begin with, because only heroes have their names etched on the stone. Only heroes recognized by the state as such. If Danzo called his father a noble man, Obito knows nothing about Yoritomo Uchiha.
But Yoritomo Uchiha is dead.
He could ask Orochimaru for more stimulants to enter his subconsciousness and talk to the dead. The dead people seem more real that living and breathing creatures right now. They're much less annoying. When winds turns colder, Obito continues to walk, well aware his clone did a good job visiting the shady's block drug store.
When bottle is empty, Obito steals new vial before visiting Orochimaru, crutching into his office, left arm wrapped to hide inflamed skin around veins and bruises from the injections.
"How many you had?" Orochimaru is having none of this bullshit and undoes the wound dressing when he makes Obito sedated.
"Is it bad for the wounded soldier to take strong pain relievers?"
Obito's whole forearm is covered by the bruises and marks from the injections, veins inflamed.
"You come for more, Obito?"
Sounds good. He could become one with the core of the universe on that stimulants.
"What's your price? Name it, Snake."
"You are a junkie. Previously you had a little history of taking painkillers."
He smiles even more, even wider, so much it hurts. They both know what those 'painkillers' mean. Some otherworldly stuff meant for special ANBU missions and Orochimaru needs an volunteer.
"You are doing research for Konoha. You are in charge of few top secret experiments. Why do you care, Orochimaru?"
"You sure don't want to go to your medical appointment with arm like that," he is pleased. Obito is silent. "You aren't my test subject. I owe your father something."
Obito doesn't expect that. What does his dead, emotionally detached father has to do with Orochimaru? He doesn't like it. Something is wrong. Thinking about his family makes him more uncomfortable than discussing the drugs abuse. He nervously fiddles with his left arm wrappings.
"My father is a dead man for years. He was an ordinary shinobi who cared more about village than his family. What makes you think that I am going to believe that bullshit only because of my dead parents?"
Obito flicks his middle finger at Orochimaru. Snake Sanin certainly knows more about Yoritomo, certainly disregarding his offensive gesture. He's right. Orochimaru rubs some kind of weird ointment into his skin and it's itching so bad. Golden eyes of predator meet his single, coal black eye.
"You don't have to believe that. I know more about your father than you could ever imagine."
"I came for my 'painkillers'. If you want to give it to me as you claim 'favor to a dead man', fine."
"You are not in the position to make demands, Obito. I am going to give you more as a gift to you. As sign of my good will."
Gift. Nice try, Snake. That's Sneaky Snake price.
"So what did my father do?" Obito's voice is softer, almost vulnerable.
"He stood between Danzo and me." He hands him a few bottles of 'morphine'. His father stopped Danzo from taking Orochimaru into the ROOT?
"I see. Thank you for your support, Snake."
It's awkward to be unable to thank in person for their continous support, watching over you all night. This mysterious watcher isn't an ANBU. Being watched over is nothing new for Obito.
He's off-duty for now, under ROOT surveiliance for two weeks. That shop assistant across the street and the bartender errand boy are watching him during daylight. In the flowing moonlight, mysterious watcher appears. Obito isn't going to chase ROOT in the rooftops.
Not with two crutches and brace. Obito remembers when he was released from the hospital after his injury, three weeks ago. The chase he and Hound had. His throat clenches at the memory of run through the forest, red footprints on red snow.
Week after, he hesitated before reaching for bottle and syringue. Metal needle is tempting, and an invitation to see the ghosts.
"Sorry, Rin," he mutters, flicking fire jutsu to lit the cigarette. With his free hand he gets the crutch and hobbles to the kitchen. "Maybe another time."
When he dabbles around the counter, cutting the vegetables and chopping the pork, Kakashi's chakra signature appears inside their apartment. He's still wearing his ANBU blacks and slate grey armour, painted mask brushed to the side. His silver hair have reddish tint to it. Obito is kneeling by him, gently touching his side. Kakashi wheezes, takes a deeper breath and growls at him when fingers find sore spot.
"Hand me tweezers. They're in my kit," he says, already stripped of the uniform and ANBU blacks. He slides kitchen knife, cutting gauze wrapped around the abdomen, soaked in dried red. "I need antiseptic."
"You're kneeling on your bad leg, Obito," Kakashi informs him curtly, handing him antiseptic from the medical kit. He notices bottle of morphine, fresh needle and syringue. Obito pours handful of liquid into his wound and it's burning. Dark onyx eye is keeping him firmly in the place, he's not even wiggling.
"Shut up. It's a broken tip of poisoned dart. I have to remove it, stop the bleeding and stitch you up," yes, he had an antidote. Obito carefully opens the wound and pulls small object out of Kakashi's body. Kakashi howls and metal clatters against metal. "You were so hot when you ripped his throat apart," his left hand is glowing weak green light and stops the flow of blood. Healing chakra embraces him.
"You saw me?"
"You made me nut," Obito starts putting stitches on elongated wound. "I imagined things we could do together, you and me. Your killing intent, your fangs so close to my throat. I wouldn't mind it."
"Obito-"
"I'm concerned about ROOT and Hokage gave me a new job. I'm supposed to look for potential ANBU candidates and estimate their ability. However, it seems Minato doesn't want to talk about ROOT. Danzo wants us in ROOT. He told this to myself. I told him to fuck off and warned him."
"Are you fucking kidding me? You were in ROOT headquaters? With your leg?"
Obito has to admit, yes, he considered it. That would be something. He pulls back to the medical kit, with an antidote. He's not sure if this one is going to work, right now Kakashi is the most important. That day on Will of Fire monument, Obito realizes who could help him. Orochimaru.
"He came to talk with me personally. Danzo knows something about my father, he knows about lots of people so it doesn't matter. Yoritomo Uchiha is a dead man."
Obito Uchiha is a dead man, too. He rubs his crotch against his and distant prod of pain in his shoulder, Obito gives him a shot of morphine. Kakashi is way too slow to fight back and kill Obito on the spot. Tiny ninja catches him and puts on futon, disregarding his healing limb.
They try again next month, when Obito is already healed, free of movement restricting cast. He still has to wear brace for a couple of weeks. Obito has one of bad days, lets Kakashi force him into submission, because it makes him feel better. Reason behind Obito's sour mood is as usual related to the Uchiha dramatics. All Kakashi knows it's some sort of mission for Minato and he can't get the answers out of anyone.
It's surprise. Captain decides it's good to meet with other countries representatives once awhile. Knowing deep rooted animosity of Obito's toward Iwa, he points him out as Konoha representative.
Behind the ANBU mask Raven, Obito is a Konoha poster boy. From zero to hero.
In official records, Obito was marked as retired from the duty due his injury.
If Kakashi mentions Obito truly deserves the mantle of Hero of the Sharingan, his heroic sacrifice a noble example of the Will of Fire, Obito always smells of anger and distress. A Konoha poster boy, marks of his sacrifice visible on his body.
Obito considers Will of Fire as the state propaganda bullshit. Kakashi is bad at reading people but he sees the tiredness set in the deep lines of his scar tissue. Obito is twenty-one, an adult by civilian standards. When he dresses on the event, he wraps his Senju forearm tighly, careful not to leave any opening. He doesn't want people to know the hallowed martyr and killer machine The Slayer are the one. They're both infamous in ANBU, fear and awe sticking to them as blood to their hands.
He trades his ANBU uniform, eye-patch and long gloves for standard Jounin garb and Konoha hitai-ate. He doesn't bother to cover his missing eye as he usual does. For goodbye Kakashi holds his hands, sucks his toes and lets Obito suck his fingers. He ties his hair in long ponytail, because active duty shinobi usually crop their hair.
Kakashi dons Hound mask and follows him as the hidden guard. He knows Obito senses it as well, presence at his peripheral. Iwa representatives aren't that bad. The girl, Kurotsuchi, the blond Deidara and huge man, Akatsuchi.
They're relatives of Tsuchikage and argue over Konoha won the war, the peacy treaties injustice. They of course know Councilman Danzo who opposed to peace without war contributions.
Konoha won the war, Iwa lost. The Iwa representatives brought it up and Obito just shrugged. He wasn't there to insist to The Konoha Council for negotiatons to went smoothly. After all, he's just retired from the active duty.
How does it feel to be hallowed martyr, Konoha poster boy? Does he have any social privileges as war veteran?
Boy named Deidara asks lots of questions, asking how badly he was injured. Obito doesn't like Iwa. They could suck his dick if he had any.
He doesn't say it loud. This friendly neighbourhood visit is goddamn important. He plays good for now, poster Hero of the Sharingan doesn't do that.
Kurotsuchi accusses him Konoha plays so innocent role, did terrible things and never apologized for their actions. Obito is ready to punch her. Boy named Deidara is nice. Obito likes him. Kurotsuchi really gets on his nerves.
So Obito subtly mocks her, apologizing he can only bow, not kneel because his injures prevent him from. Then he apologizes for Konoha artrocities during the war, and his bow is deep and his words are sincere. That's the least he can do, the Hero of Sharingan words aren't as important as Hokage or other Konoha representatives, but the gesture is indeed impressive. That shuts Kurotsuchi mouth.
Obito isn't allowed to attend other part of meeting, with Hokage. He's not authorized to parttake in candestline talks, not as retired shinobi. He's tired and in bad mood, glad he can step out of the charade. He'd have Hound spill the tea later.
He's the man they call The Slayer. Obito rolls on his futon mattress, switching on the nightstand lamp as he did before, reading before bed. This is another porn from the libray and damn, it's good. He rolls to the nightstand, fishing jar of lube from the drawer. It's just coconut oil but it smells nice and any greasy thing can make decent lubricant.
He's the man they call The Slayer but he haven't killed thousands. Hundred, maybe. Obito doesn't care about dead people. All, except them. Rin. He can't meet Rin right now, when his fingers are coated in lube, touching his ass. It takes few minutes and it doesn't feel good when he slides his finger inside his clenched ass. He tries to rim it and prepare for more, but it hurts. It's supposed to hurt, so Obito takes more lube. There's blood on his finger. His own blood, tastes like iron.
He's an idiot. Obito abandons lube, catches his crutch and runs to the bathroom, to take shower, wash away this fucking humiliation. Shall he summon clone to help with ass-rimming?
"Don't blame yourself," Kakashi comes, fingers coated in lube. "Do you have that much lust for my body? Do you crave my lips? Do you want to make me yours?" Obito smells of arousal, facing the mattress. Kakashi rims his ass carefully and he has skills. Kakashi excells him in everything.
"I shouldn't have. Is it wrong to feel like I do?" Obito moans when Kakashi stretches him. "When I was Princess Ototsuki I've realized who I love. I have burning desire for your body. I crave your lips. I want to make you mine. I was afraid this isn't appropriate."
Kakashi slides his fingers inside Obito's ass, two of them.
"Don't bullshit me," me moves inside back and forth. "You're last person who gives a fuck about social norms and regulations."
"You misunderstood me," Obito hisses. "I never meant to force you to be more than friends. Roommates. We've come this far, Kakashi. I never wanted to destroy our relationship by demanding more from you. I never talked to you, because you're a freaking genius, you should figure out-"
Kakashi lifts his fingers and licks them. Obito ass is oozing pale liquid, so like cum. It tastes like dango and pork chop ramen.
"Obito, your self-lubricating ass is lovely," Kakashi buries his face in his buttcheeks. "I should figure out your ass before."
"Don't bullshit me. Did you listen even one word I said?"
"Of course I did," Kakashi licks his buttcheeks, eats his ass. "This is why you haven't told me earlier. Or maybe you deserve better?"
Kakashi has so much sensual skills, so much experience. Too much experience for loveboy classes in ANBU. Kakashi is sweet, sweet like honey and poison. Honeypot. Fucking honeypot assigments.
"We're both fucked up. Touch my dick and balls and tell me what you think," Obito can shape his nether regions to his will, exposing fake dick and balls, looking like real ones. Too bad they're unresponsive to his stimulation, fake and useless body parts. Right now his nether regions are smooth and when Kakashi touches it, it feels good.
Kakashi touches his nether regions and it feels good. Kakashi loves them the way they are. Obito realizes he was a fool and all his worries were in vain.
When he's bored and dogs are gone, reaching the core of the universe seems irrevelant. There's not enough edge to make him feel more alive. After having his ass fucked by clone wearing a strap, he feels less dead. He needs more thrilling tasks than poisoning himself with stimulants and he finds it.
The prospect of having a lethal touch is persistent in his head. Safe, secret ability to use as last resort, when he's injured and stripped of his chakra. Ability difficult to maintain and control. Double-edged sword. Obito decides to master it. After all, he was familiar with the technique. He used it on Princess Ototsuki, and the touch that can kill suits The Slayer.
Kiri Bingo Book, Obito opens it and flicks the pages to his entry. The Cold-Blooded Friend Killer is too painful to look at. The Slayer entry is something that does not hurt physically.
Obito extends his arm toward the potted plant on the windowsill. Mokuton chakra is gathering in his fingertips, and the potted plant is flowering. He senses the life force flowing through the skin, and the potted plant is blossoming. This sheer power of the nature force flow changes, going directly into his body. Obito absorbed chakra easily, and the plant wither and dies. There's high pitched sounds of small rodent and dead bird falls on the another side of the window.
Obito cuts the flow of absorbed chakra immediately and his hand is itching. He quickly pulled the glove into it and prepares proper funeral for collateral damage. He did not even sensed their sudden deaths.
Look from absent Kakashi hurts him physically.
"If they want The Slayer, who am I to disobey?" he asks, choking on his tears when burying small rodent and bird. On their grave, he grows bush with sweet, red fruits, rare delicacy for small birds. That incident makes Obito feel like shit, much less than forced visits to the compound he doesn't even grace with a single thought. Kakashi is gone for now. Obito wants his Kakashi back.