Lucy snuck out of the bed a few days later. It was barely morning, but she couldn't sleep. His birthday was in a few days... fuck she had to get him something, but what the fuck could she get someone who had everything. Then his fucking family was coming over. Would she have to meet them? Were they getting serious?

She groaned as she stepped into the kitchen, but she froze when she saw Natsu's dad sipping coffee and reading the paper at the table. "Oh, shit. Mr. hot dad!"

The man looked up when he heard her and he grinned. "Well, well. I'm glad your still around... like the hair."

"Really?" She asked as she opened the refrigerator to see what was left.

"It's good to know that someone's keeping my son out of trouble. "

"What if I am the trouble, though?" She asked as she sat down with a bowl full of cold spaghetti.

He gaped at her for a moment while she actually ate cold spaghetti, before he shook his head. "Trust me. You're good for him." He didn't say it with the most confidence while she ate that shit though.

"Sho whfat dho you dho?" She asked with her mouth full.

"I'm the chief coordinator of the police department here." He responded, very used to Natsu talking with his mouth full.

She swallowed the food before she spoke again. "Ah, so you travel alot?"

"Mmhmm." He took a sip of his coffee. "I mostly handle conferences and meetings with the state officials. The business side of things."

She nodded her head while she continued to eat. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For not turning me in to your popo pals."

He chuckled. "Think of it as repayment for saving my son's genitalia."

She choked a little on her food before she laughed. She had to totally agree.

"The hell's going on in here?" Natsu grumbled, rubbing his eyes as he sat down between them.

"You're up early." His dad stated instead of answering his question.

"The absence of her presence wakes me up." He shamelessly admitted as he crossed his arms, slightly glaring at her.

She just shrugged. "I couldn't sleep. Plus, I wanted to spend some alone time with your hot dad."

"Cut that shit out." He pointed at her as she smirked. "When the hell did you get here anyways?" He rounded on his dad next.

"Late."

Natsu slowly narrowed his eyes at his dad, waiting for an elaboration that seemed less likely the longer he stared at him.

His dad just smirked. "Keep your pants on, son."

"Yeah, Natsu." She ignored the look on his face, which screamed "bitch said what?". "You're not his father... he's yours."

His dad smirked and patted his son on the back. "If only she was older."

Lucy practically drooled on the table at his words, until Natsu's face entered her vision, making her suppress the hysterics threatening to come out. "You're banned from our wedding."

That officially caught his dad's attention. "Yeah, right, Natsu. Someone's gotta give her away."

"Be more sensitive! The fuck is wrong with you, fartbag!"

However, it only made Lucy grin. "It would be such an honor, Mr. hot dad."

Igneel gave her a wink right before Natsu slammed his hands down on the table. He stood up and pointed at Lucy. "You are coming with me to school today." She started looking around the floor and under the table, causing Natsu to scrunch his eyebrows. "The fuck are you doing?"

"Looking for your brain cells. I'm sure life is really hard for you without them."

He rolled his eyes and glared at his dad when he accidentally let out a chuckle. Grabbing her wrist, he pulled her out of her seat. "I don't trust you alone with him."

Lucy rolled her eyes this time as she let him drag her along. "You're such a drama queen."

"Gold digger." He shot back.

"Ass licker."

"Brown finger."

"Taint tickler."

"Fuck!" Lucy laughed when he stubbed his toe on the stairs. She remembered doing the exact same shit.

Igneel sighed and shook his head, finally finishing his coffee. Those two had to be proof of soulmates. He didn't think anyone in the world existed like them.

"Bye, Mr. Hot dad!" Lucy waved as she and Natsu headed towards the front door, the latter remaining quiet.

Igneel waved from his spot on the couch. "Bye, kids! Try not to go to jail!"

"Will do!" Natsu shut the door before she could say anything else. Her grin grew brighter than a thousand suns when she realized that they were gonna take his car. "I'm driving!"

Natsu crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow while she ran up to the driver's side and looked at him. "Why in the fuck would you think you're driving?"

She huffed and crossed her own arms. "Why in the fuck wouldn't I? I called it."

He looked behind him for a second before he looked back at her. "It's my car, bimbo. Do you even have a license?"

She growled and looked at the ground. "No...fuck you."

He smirked at her as she slowly trudged to the passenger's side. He walked up to his car and opened the door, sliding in with a satisfied 'ah'.

She glared at him, resisting the urge to bitch slap his smug face. "Mark my words, dick breath. I will drive this car."

"In your dreams, yeah." He laughed as he started the engine and sped off towards school.

"We're here!" He called as they pulled into the parking lot.

Lucy beautiful bubble popped at his words. She was so enjoying riding in a car with the wind on her face. It had been beautiful and freeing. Now though... "what the fuck am I supposed to do here anyways?"

Natsu shrugged as he found a parking spot. "Whatever the fuck you wanna do, I guess. Just as long as you're not at the house."

She rolled her eyes dramatically. "Gimme the keys so I can go have some fun at least."

"Not a chance in hell, sweetheart."

"... bitch."

He smirked at her grumpy face and he quickly leaned over to peck her on the cheek. "Don't worry, my unicorn. You could probably spy on people or sneak around...I bet you could just sit in class and no one would even question it."

"I'll figure it out." She sighed. She couldn't fucking stay mad at him and she hated it. She bet he knew it too... that asshole.

Hey guys! Sorry for the little wait. I realized how weird I am the other day cuz I was reading some stories on here and then I read this one and I was like... no one writes shit like this but me... that's okay though, I don't mind being the weird one lol Thanks for all the love you guys! I don't think I would've kept writing this without you all. I love you guys!