So... you did it huh? You finally managed to finish that book you've been working so hard on.
Okay, listen. In my defense...
Oh! Wait! You had it just sitting in your phone since 2017? What were you doing with it all this time? Surely making corrections.
Well I mean...
Oh wait! I remember now! You decided 'hey lets change the main characters name the Dindu and give him a metal leg! Won't that be neat!?'. And was it lobster? Was it neat? Please tell me how neat and impassioned your book is.
Okay, you don't need to be so hostile...
Oh what's that? It was a chore? How could that be? I mean you just love the walking dead dontcha? It's like your favorite show ever?
Actually...
No? You didn't even finish the seventh season? But the whole book takes place at that time! How could you be so accurate with the time lines!? The continuity Lobster! Continuity! The characters!
Well I mean its kinda weird writing with other peoples characters...
You dont like the characters!? Why in the fuck did you make a book if you dont give a fuck about the characters!? Who's your favorite character? Is it Daryl?!?
Well...
Whatcha mean you forgot to put him in the book!? Oh thats right! You had him in one chapter, realized he wasn't in the book, and went back and erased him completely. How great for you to erase the most popular character in the entire show! Who's supposed to carry the audience huh? Dindu? Toby? Literally no character has any star power.
Well I thought Dindu was interesting. He's funny, strong... and stuff.
One moment that boy is a god amongst men and the next he's a scared puppy. Whats the middle ground. Why is he so inconsistent? He was raised by monks but has no discipline? He's a former soldier but acts on impulse? Are these good qualities for a battlefield?
Well I mean if he was human...
Oh, that reminds me! We made literally no progress in finding out what he is.
Thats for the next book.
Record scratch, freeze frame. Next book? Your bitch ass is writing another book?
Well...wrote.
You wrote a second book!? Wrote? As in past tense? As in its done? Is it the walking dead again? Do you plan on just making up the story as you go again and butchering whats left of the resemblance to the original story?
No, its actually a Tokyo Ghoul story now. Did you even read the last chapter of my book?
No. No one did. You don't even read most the shit you write.
The new one is actually significantly better then this one.
Well that bar ain't exactly high now is it sweetie? Sigh, guess Ill give it a shot them. Alma signing out.