"And we're back to Total Drama Shuffle Party!" Chris said as he sat within the military helicopter. "In the last episode, Godfrey found himself in a position where he could only select people he'd made deals with as potential Sacrificial Lambs, and needed to keep everyone convinced that they were still his number one in spite of everything. Needless to say, some people were less than convinced. Hehaha. Hildegard and Wisdom formed a final two deal, recognizing that Godfrey was pretty likely to take Virgil to the final two with him, while Virgil drummed up a rapport with Hildegard to make sure that she would stick by him and Godfrey.
"The Divine Intervention challenge saw the final four using super-strong leaf blowers to try and get one another out of the ring. Hildegard managed to persevere her way into power, and she removed herself from danger and put Virgil in her place. This also granted her the sole vote of the night, which Virgil and Wisdom both clamored for. Virgil even offered the paladin a final two deal and reminded her that he didn't exactly have a challenge streak going for him, giving her something to think about.
"In the end, Hildegard recognized Virgil as the option she trusted less, and the candyman's game went rotten. The final Big Kahuna challenge went underway, and it's going to determine who will make it to the final two, not to mention they get to pick who'll make it with them. Who will our finalists be? Who will fall just short? The answers to all this and more, tonight! On Total! Drama! Sh-Sh-Sh-SHUFFLE PARTY!"
The final three contestants all stood on the awkward wooden pegs with their hands on the Chris totem.
"It's been ten minutes since the challenge has begun," Chris said. "All you guys have to do is stay standing on those pegs and keep your hand on the totem pole. But how long can you do that? Hehaha. How are you guys feeling?"
"Physically? Mentally? Spiritually? Financially?" Wisdom pressed.
"Yes," Chris simply responded.
"I will not allow myself to lose," Godfrey said. "The only way you'll see me step down is after these two have already done so."
"Quite a claim from someone who's made final two deals with both of us," Hildegard smirked.
"Well, clearly my deal with you doesn't matter if you're just going to lay it out like that," Godfrey grumbled.
"Did you think I didn't already know?" Wisdom asked.
"No, I figured you did, but laying it out there so casually sends more of a message than what's actually being revealed," Godfrey posited.
"And what doth thou claim I am stating?" Hildegard challenged.
"That you're confident in your final two deal with Wisdom," Godfrey answered. "If anything, you've just given me more of a reason to win, if I have no reason to believe that either of you would take me to the final two."
"So you're just going to assume that I won't, based on what she said without actually hearing any input from me?" Wisdom frowned.
"I'm assumed you wouldn't based on how the last couple of rounds have gone," Godfrey responded. "Of course, between the two of you, I think Hildegard is a bigger threat, so I'd be more inclined to take you to the final two than her."
"Surprise of surprises! Godfrey has been dishonest with me!" Hildegard reacted sarcastically.
"If Shadya were in the final three, and you won the challenge, would you take her?" Godfrey doubted.
"That, er, depends on who else is with us, and-"
"I think I've made my point," Godfrey interrupted.
"Interrupting people is rude, you know?" Wisdom told him.
Godfrey moved his shoulders in a slight shrugging motion while keeping his hand on the totem pole.
Confessional:
Hildegard: I become more furious with Godfrey each passing day! He acts as though victory is his birthright, as though his ends justify his means, as though he has done nothing wrong! He is not the final boss that I anticipated, but as the great holy knight Lady Hildegard, 'tis my job to vanquish evil!
So, I've made it this far in the game. Final three. I still can't believe I made it to the second island, let alone this far. Things weren't looking good for me back on the Knights of Goodness. Kun thought he could try and take control of things, which he couldn't, Liberty refused to contribute, Kirkland was never up to any good... It's a shame Tegan left as early as she did, but at least Rhiannon stuck with me throughout the rest of the game. Had we lost one more challenge before the first shuffle, though...
I've been blessed in this game, I would not dare imply otherwise. I am religious, I've made this known in the past. I do believe that the Lord has had a hand in me making it this far. Whether or not it is His will for me to win, I'm still incredibly grateful for this opportunity, and for the fact that I have been able to spend so much of my time out here actually playing the game. This is something I've wanted to do for years and years, and it was frustrating getting my auditions turned down in the past. Perhaps this was the Lord's way of telling me that this was the particular season I was meant to be on. Perhaps the one to win. Winning would change so much for the better.
Growing up, it was always the same things. "Fantasy Nerd", "Goody Two Shoes", "not girly enough". These are titles I claim to wear with pride. To some extent, I do. They're a part of who I am. People always tell you that you should be proud of who you are because you're unique and all that, but then people always give me grief for being who I am. Maybe not the same people, but oftentimes it feels like the world is giving me two different messages, and I have no idea which one I should listen to.
I can't help but wonder if that's why I was drawn to fantasy in the first place. I've been an easy target for ridicule even before I dressed up and acted like a knight. Roleplaying is definitely a lot of fun, but, other than swapping out "you" for "thou" and other similar bits, the personality I've displayed in this game is still my own. I can, and often do, speak without thinking. I wish so badly to be able to control it, but it just sort of happens. As effortlessly as I can walk across a room or eat lunch, I can speak without thinking.
Not only does this get me in trouble with adults, but it also comes at the scorn of my peers as well. It was not an uncommon day when I was younger when a classmate would provoke me, intentionally or not, and I would shout at them, rarely articulating my thoughts and making a scene. I recall wondering just what was wrong with me that things like this keep happening to me. There's nothing wrong with my head. My parents definitely would have gotten me tested. So how does my brain completely disregard any and all consequences and simply act on its own whenever I have something to say?
Okay, I lied earlier, by the way. It wasn't just when I was younger. It still happens to this day. Not nearly as often, as I like to think I've learned at least some from my mistakes, but I still tend to shout at others. In this game, I've been a character, intentionally playing up my tendencies to be loud or react to others' annoyances by calling myself a Lawful Good paladin, an over-the-top knight. Maybe people would think I'm just being in-character. Maybe they won't judge me as harshly as they might otherwise.
Am I deceiving everyone? Is this any different from what Godfrey did? Surely it is. I'm not hurting anyone by playing a bit. I was worried that bringing my lance into the game could go awry, but things have gone surprisingly well regarding it. Still, I look forward to the day when I'm comfortable enough with myself that I can talk to my friends without being a character.
Well, I managed to make it this far. Only two more people to defeat until I can claim that I am a winner. Until I can be proud of myself.
My name is Hildegard Devdan, and I will be winning Total Drama Shuffle Party.
Confessional:
Hildegard: When thou watcheth this show on television, thou believe in thy mind that thou could probably do the challenges so much better than those who art doing them. Thou art wrong. Standing on those pegs for but ten minutes is torture. But I shan't yield! To do so could quite literally be to forfeit mine entire game! Never!
The three contestants' faces all twisted in discomfort.
"Gonna be honest, I didn't expect all three of you to still be up here at this point," Chris teased. "It's been twenty minutes. I hope nobody's getting tired. Hehaha."
"I can sleep when I have guaranteed my place in the final two!" Hildegard insisted.
"So will you not sleep if you're eliminated?" Wisdom asked.
"Art thou planning on eliminating me?" Hildegard grunted.
"Godfrey just said he'd eliminate you if he won the challenge, right?" Wisdom mentioned.
"Dodging the question, eh?" Godfrey pointed out. "So you recognize Hildegard as the threat she is, too."
"I would not have thee poisoning sweet Wisdom's mind with thy manipulations!" Hildegard accused.
"Give her some credit. She's smart enough to come to that conclusion without me spelling it out for her." Godfrey shook his head.
"Can you guys not speak on my behalf?" Wisdom asked flatly. "If you guys are so worried about making it to the finale, then why not focus on winning instead of pointless arguing?"
"Yeah, Hildegard, stop with the pointless arguing," Godfrey taunted.
"Thou will not get the best of me, foul villain!" Hildegard shouted.
"Just because I'm working against you, I have to be a villain?" Godfrey questioned.
"Thou art a villain because thou art manipulative, dishonest, and self-serving!" Hildegard insisted. "'Tis not a difficult concept to grasp!"
"They're not going to stop, are they?" Wisdom sighed to Chris.
"And here I thought keeping watch over this challenge was going to be boring," Chris chuckled.
Confessional:
Godfrey: One thing I've noticed about Hildegard is that she hates being misunderstood. So I was thinking if I got her riled up a little bit... maybe it'd distract her from the task at hand, or the increase in stress would... Damn, now that I'm saying it out loud, it sounds kind of messed up. But I'll be a little messed up if it means I can shape the future.
It was a massive risk, doing what I did. But I'd already spent countless hours, often consecutive and sleepless, making sure that Ginger was perfect. I needed an environment in which she could be social, use problem-solving skills, and be physically active. Total Drama was a perfect fit, and, if things went well, we'd be walking home with a million dollars we could use to further my lofty ideas. Frankly, I'm surprised the show went along with my harebrained idea. Granted, Ginger's entire existence is something most people haven't seen anything like, but still, you'd think they'd give me some catch.
What was important, however, was that I was around in case things with Ginger went awry. In order for easier social integration, I needed Ginger to believe that she was an organic human being, just like everyone else. If she or anyone else knew she was different, then she'd be treated differently and/or feel different. That's not what the experiment was for. I wanted to see a robot integrate themselves seamlessly into a human social sphere. Of course, with such a new technology, that's going to be easier said than done. So what I did was take up two contestant spots in this game.
Of course, this show seems like it goes out of its way to cast people who would make for good television, and, frankly, I'm not too special on my own, so I needed an excuse as to why I would be here. I couldn't give away that I was the one who built Ginger, of course, for numerous reasons. In fact, I had Ginger believe that I was her robot and that she needed to hide that, just in case anyone caught on to us. Feigning amnesia made a lot of sense. For one, whenever I was performing diagnostics on Ginger, I could leave her with the memory that she was doing so to me and erasing my own memories. For two, it would give the others a reason not to suspect why someone as plain as I am would be on the show at all. And for three, it allowed me to downplay my intelligence, so the others wouldn't see me as a threat.
Being out here was definitely a new experience for me. I don't get out a lot back home, mostly because I've been busy working on Ginger, but also because I've just never been very socially inclined to begin with. I used to have friends I'd eat lunch with at school, but I got into the habit of spending lunchtime on coding and planning and what have you, to the point where I just stopped hanging out with them, and they stopped inviting me to hang out. I see it as a temporary setback. I can make friends after I've brought the future into modern times. Hell, I can literally "make" friends if I wanted to.
Of course, the truth about me was eventually found out. How Ginger and everyone else reacted was definitely a hell of a learning experience. Hell, how people reacted when they thought I was a robot was a learning experience. I knew I shouldn't have let myself get close to anyone, really, because I knew they'd eventually find out the truth, but Roxie... The wounds with Roxie still haven't healed. They probably won't for a while. I really did like her, and a part of me hoped that she'd be cool with whatever she found out about me. I... hope it was a learning experience for her, too, and for everyone else.
Despite everything, though, I've made it this far. I've buried the hatchet with Ginger, I still have friends in people like Virgil... But what really matters is the million dollars. So many upgrades, parts, tools I could get with that money.
My name is Godfrey Wakeman, and I will be winning Total Drama Shuffle Party.
Confessional:
Godfrey: I think I'll let Ginger take the reins of the next project. I'm interested to see what ideas she has for making a robot that I might not have considered. Even if I don't win the million, I think we can figure something out with what little I still have.
"Half an hour and nobody's stepped down," Chris commented. "You guys really want this, don't you?"
"Can you blame us?" Wisdom asked. "A guaranteed spot in the final two is no small reward, don't you think?"
"Hildegard and I have both said we'd take you to the final two if we won," Godfrey pointed out. "Why keep going if you're already guaranteed a spot?"
"Hast thou any pride?" Hildegard scoffed. "Earning thy spot is far more satisfying than being handed a spot!"
"It's a lot less painful, though," Godfrey pointed out as he adjusted the positions of his feet without actually stepping off the posts.
"Is it any worse than the pain and isolation of your pitiful, meaningless existence?" Wisdom mused.
"...Where the hell did that come from?" Godfrey asked, bemused.
"You've never heard that song?" Wisdom asked.
"I can't say I have," Godfrey told her.
"Really?" Wisdom asked. "Is it not as well-known as I thought, or are you not as media-aware as I thought?"
"I'll confess I've no knowledge of that to which thou referest, either," Hildegard added.
Wisdom nodded. "Do you guys ever find it hard to connect with people who don't partake in the same media you do?"
"All the time," Hildegard agreed.
"I don't really watch TV or movies, or play video games," Godfrey answered. "I listen to music, but I mostly stick with the classics."
"Is Albuquerque not a classic?" Wisdom asked.
"Well obviously I haven't heard, like, every song ever made," Godfrey told her. "Hm, I wonder if robots will ever be able to appreciate music like an organic person."
"Could one truly program the ability to appreciate the nuances, to instill in them their own personal tastes, to sense the true beauty of melody and harmony?" Wisdom wondered.
"I've done a lot of things once considered impossible," Godfrey smirked.
Confessional:
Wisdom: At the end of the day, even though all of us are fighting for a million dollars, we've all been through this game together, huh? Do you think everyone who played will be friends after all this is over? Or at least most of us? (She smiles.) That'd be nice, wouldn't it?
I still can't believe I even sent in an audition tape, let alone got accepted, let alone made it to the final three. The me of just a couple of years ago wouldn't have done that. She'd be too nervous. Not that I wasn't nervous going into this. I think it's pretty clear to everyone that I'm never one hundred percent sure of myself. It's too risky. What if I'm wrong? What if I make a claim and then some piece of information I had no idea about rears its head? What if I look like a complete idiot who doesn't know what she's talking about in front of everyone?
I think like this a lot. Okay, I overthink. I get anxious. I second-guess myself. I repeat myself a bunch to stall for time for something to say. And then I can't think of anything to say. Needless to say, I get self-conscious about it pretty easily and don't really have a lot of friends. How can I when I struggle to hold an extended conversation? Not to mention I'm just not very captivating as a person. I'm not the prettiest girl in school, and I don't really connect with the same trends that a lot of people do. I do try to keep up with whichever TV shows are coming out, but that alone usually isn't enough.
That is how I got into Total Drama, though. Ever since I discovered it, I did find Total Drama particularly interesting. The idea that someone ends up leaving in almost every episode gave stakes to it all, you know? Every time someone leaves, everyone who stayed started to matter a little more, and you started to pick out your favorites over time, started rooting for or against people. It's kind of genius, isn't it? To think that I might have people rooting for or against me at this point. It's kind of hard to believe, even now.
I know I haven't been the most social butterfly in the game. I didn't really expect to be. But I still made a few friends out of this. Gretchen, Jeremy, Bunko... Dean. I've followed Total Drama communities online on and off, but nobody at school really likes the show the way I do. Being on the show makes that barrier a bit easier to overcome, doesn't it? These people like it enough to send in an audition, right? And, other than Jeremy who's outgoing and conventionally good-looking, the friends I've made are kind of outcasts, too, aren't they? It's nice getting to meet people who are kind of like me: Total Drama fans who might not have a lot of friends back home.
I still can't believe I managed to make moves in this game. This is the first time I've been out on my own, without my parents or anybody. I wonder if that has anything to do with it. Being more independent than I normally would be. Either way, I managed to give my early game alliance the initiative it needed by getting Jim to split his vote. The first shuffle was kind of scary, since I was separated from my allies, and then my new ally Kun was eliminated right after, but Dean joined back up with me, and then I made friends with Bunko and Jeremy... Even Shadya, whom everyone feared, couldn't take me out, even though she tried. And after we merged, people underestimated me in the face of bigger threats like Elmer, Gretchen, or Nestor.
I probably just got lucky, but it's taken me this far, hasn't it? Even on this island, I managed to vote out the biggest threat in the game and managed to make deals that would take me this far. It's been scary, as you'd expect social games with stakes to be, but I've still done what I could to play the game. I've still given it my all.
My name is Wisdom Cho, and I will win Total Drama Shuffle Party.
Confessional:
Wisdom: Of course, friends or not, I'm still in this competition, you know? Are the three of us not going to give our all in order to win? To do otherwise would just be a waste of our and everyone else's time, wouldn't it? So don't count me out, you hear?!
"It has been one hour, and all three of you guys are still at it!" Chris announced.
"Would any of us give up a guaranteed spot in the finale so easily?" Wisdom doubted. "What could be better in this game than making it to the finale? Winning is our ultimate goal, isn't it? And even if you don't win, you'll still be more easily remembered, no?"
"You make a good point, brah," Chris nodded. "Of course, only two of you are going to make it that far. One of you is going to have tortured yourself in this challenge for over an hour for absolutely nothing. Hehaha."
"Whoever loses shall do so knowing that he fought hard," Hildegard said.
"'He', huh?" Godfrey caught.
"'Tis naught but the use of masculine pronouns to represent the general lot of us all," Hildegard said innocently. "Overthink it not."
"I didn't realize it was still the 1900s," Godfrey remarked.
"To be fair, has she not always spoken archaically?" Wisdom pointed out.
"We all know what she meant," Godfrey insisted. "And here I thought Hildegard was so against people pretending like they don't understand you. I guess it's okay when she does it because she's so Lawful Good."
"'Twas but a jest! Thou art blowing it out of proportion!" Hildegard insisted.
"If you say so," Godfrey smirked.
"You know he's just trying to do what he's accusing you of doing, right?" Wisdom told Hildegard. "Would a grand knight like yourself give in so easily to his trickery?"
"I would not! Thou art correct, Wisdom!" Hildegard decided.
"'Trickery'? I'm not some mustache-twirling villain. I'm just trying to figure out Hildegard's angle, here," Godfrey stated.
"And what conclusion, pray tell, hast thou come to?" Hildegard scoffed.
"I'll tell you if you step down from the challenge," Godfrey smiled.
Confessional:
Hildegard: After an hour of this challenge, I think we all wanted to step down. But that simply will not do! Too much is on the line! I will stay standing until the others give up or I pass out!
Godfrey: I guess it's far too late in the game to worry about how you feel about your opponents, or, rather, how your opponents feel about you. The girls know that, so they're trying to make me out to be a bad guy in order to avoid feeling guilty when the beat me. Of course, that might work if not for one thing: they will not beat me.
Wisdom: ...Is the final round going to be a challenge, like it usually is? Because, no matter who makes it to the final two, how would they be able to run after this challenge? Surely our feet would be too sore? ...Or is that part of the challenge? (She shudders.)
The final three stood upon their pegs with gritted teeth and worse posture than they had when they started. The arms with which they touched the totem pole were bent down at the elbow. A cold midnight breeze blew past them, prompting them to shiver even more than they had been.
"The only thing forcing you to stay up there is yourself," Chris told the contestants. "You can step down at any point."
None of the contestants reacted.
"Damn, you guys are really focused," Chris pointed out. "Not giving me a whole lot to work with."
"'Tis not... about... thee..." Hildegard mustered.
"Fair enough," Chris said as he took his phone out of his pocket.
"...Chris?" Wisdom asked.
"Ugh. What?" Chris groaned.
"...Could you help me down?" Wisdom squeaked.
"At the risk of sounding insensitive... can you not step down yourself?" Godfrey asked.
Wisdom shook her head. "Pain..."
"Yeah, they told me this was going to happen," Chris acknowledged as he put his phone back in his pocket.
Chris made his way towards Wisdom. "Alright, arm around my shoulder. Yeah, like that," he coaxed as he eased Wisdom off of the pegs.
Wisdom grimaced as her feet hit the ground. She could only walk on her tiptoes as Chris guided her to a nearby bench.
"Wisdom is out of the challenge!" Chris announced. "It's down to you two: Godfrey and Hildegard. One of you will secure your place in the final two and get to choose who will accompany them."
"One step... closer." Godfrey forced a smile.
"Yea... to my victory," Hildegard added.
Meanwhile, Wisdom took deep breaths as she eased out the pain.
Confessional:
Wisdom: It's kind of embarrassing being the first to step down, huh? But... I felt like I was going to pass out if I'd stayed up there much longer, you know? The pain... Again I must question: are the final two meant to do a challenge with such little time to recover after this?
"What do you... make of Wisdom... dropping?" Godfrey asked Hildegard wearily.
"What dost thou... mean?" Hildegard grunted through the pain.
"She must... really trust in the both of us..." Godfrey explained.
"Why shouldn't she?" Hildegard asked. "We art clearly not taking one another... to the final two..."
"Maybe we weren't... going in... but this... changes things," Godfrey posited.
"How so?" Hildegard doubted.
"One of us... will win... and that person... will compete in the... final challenge," Godfrey explained. "If that person... faces Wisdom... they'd be in... more pain than her... tomorrow... due to participating in this challenge... for a longer period of time."
"Art thou insinuating that... thou planneth to... take me to... final two... if thou won?" Hildegard doubted.
"Yep..." Godfrey confirmed. "Wisdom's... no slouch... She's won challenges... before. So if she had... any advantage..."
"How typical... Abandoning an ally... when it's... convenient..." Hildegard scoffed.
"First of all... Wisdom has openly worked against me... for the past few rounds..." Godfrey grunted. "Second of all... You're the one who... voted out... Shadya and..."
"Thou had best not finish that sentence," Hildegard glared.
"You can't just... deny your actions..." Godfrey scowled. "You hypocrite."
"I..." Hildegard wavered.
"You claim to be... a righteous holy knight..." Godfrey continued. "But you've played a... dirtier game... than I have."
"That is not true!" Hildegard shouted. "You... Thou deceived us all!"
"The only allies I've... backstabbed... were allies I barely trusted," Godfrey insisted. "Did you... deceive us in... how much you trusted Shadya and-"
"I did not!" Hildegard shouted.
"Then how can you... call me disloyal?" Godfrey spat. "Yeah... I lied about my identity... but I had... a good reason!"
"I had... good reason... to do what I did, too!" Hildegard cried. "Thou cannot... ignore that!"
Confessional:
Hildegard: I experienced no pleasure in voting out mine allies! How dare Godfrey compare me to him?! This must be another of his manipulations! I shan't fall for it! The great Lady Hildegard has more resolve than that!
"I was building up to it... before... but I'll offer you... a deal..." Godfrey managed a small smile.
"I don't want to... hear it..." Hildegard growled.
"A final two deal..." Godfrey laid out. "No matter... who of us drops... we take the other... and eliminate Wisdom..."
"Am I allowed to intervene?" Wisdom asked Chris.
"I mean, as long as you don't push one of them off or anything, go for it," Chris allowed.
"I haven't been down for very long, right?" Wisdom called out to Godfrey and Hildegard. "Would there really be any notable difference in soreness or anything if I was in the final two? Besides, I did drop about before you too, right? Clearly, I'm not as good at challenges as either of you two, am I?"
"You had me in the... first half, but... that second part... is a load of crock..." Godfrey denied.
"How? She clearly... dropped out before we did..." Hildegard scoffed.
"But was it because... she isn't as good at challenges...?" Godfrey doubted.
"Why else would I drop before you guys?" Wisdom winced. "That blows my shot at safety, right?"
"Or does it?" Godfrey chuckled. "Both Hildegard and I... were planning on taking you to the... final two... I think we can all agree that's... obvious."
"So you accuse me of complacency?" Wisdom grunted.
"I still think you... dropped first... to conserve your energy... reduce your pain level..." Godfrey claimed. "You may claim it won't make a difference... but... as someone who's still enduring this pain... I sure would love to be... resting and... off my feet."
"Be-eth my guest," Hildegard chimed in.
"Come on, Hildegard," Godfrey continued. "Do you want to reward her... acting as if she's owed a spot in the... final two? How spoiled. After making it this far... solely for being no threat."
"...Why are you so intent on getting Hildegard to want to take you to the final two?" Wisdom asked. "Is it because you feel like you're about to pass out from the pain?"
"This challenge is... a veritable hell, but... I'm not giving up... anytime soon," Godfrey forced a smile.
"Nor am I!" Hildegard proclaimed weakly.
Confessional:
Godfrey: I think Hildegard and I both want off these damn pegs. She was clearly in extreme pain, and I definitely was. If a final two deal going through was going to get it over with faster, then I'm going to pitch a final two deal.
"You guys have been up there for an hour and a half!" Chris announced.
Godfrey and Hildegard were too spaced out to respond. Both contestants' faces were twisted in incredible pain. Their legs shook involuntarily, and they could not keep their backs upright.
"Godfrey and Hildegard, clearly in some kind of zen-like state," Chris commentated.
"There's no shame in stepping down, you know?" Wisdom urged. "Don't push your body past its limits, you hear?"
No sooner than Wisdom had finished her sentiment, one of the contestants collapsed off of the pegs and onto the ground below. The others all gasped.
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...
"Hildegard!" Wisdom cried. "Are you okay?!"
Chris walked up to Hildegard to check on her. "She's passed out, brah."
"Damn..." Godfrey whispered.
"This, of course, means that she's out of the challenge, meaning that Godfrey has secured his spot in the final two!" Chris announced.
"Yes..." Godfrey croaked. "Could someone... help me down...?"
Chris walked up to Godfrey and helped him off of the pegs and towards the bench.
"I'll give you a second to take it easy... and for Hildegard to come to... before you decide who will be joining you in our final round," Chris said to Godfrey.
Godfrey nodded.
Confessional:
Godfrey: Final two... holy cow. Deciding who to take with me is a harder decision than I thought it'd be. There are pros and cons to taking either of them. Hildegard is clearly in a worse state, but she's always been better at challenges than Wisdom, and she could just be extra motivated to do better because she passed out. On the other hand, Wisdom's had more time to recover from less pain than Hildegard, and she's won challenges in the past, but she isn't as good at them as Hildegard is. Either way, I just have one more ordeal to overcome.
An intern had provided three buckets of ice water for the contestants to soak their feet in as they sat on the bench. Hildegard had come to.
"How embarrassing..." Hildegard sighed.
"You did your best, you know?" Wisdom consoled. "You really didn't give up until you gave out, huh?"
"I should have been stronger..." Hildegard pounded weakly on the seat of the bench.
"Alright, now that we've taken some time to recover, it's time for Godfrey to make his decision on who will be joining him in the finale of Total Drama Shuffle Party," Chris announced.
"Alright..." Godfrey stood up and stood before Hildegard and Wisdom. "I'll be honest: I'm still not one hundred percent on who I want to take with me. So, in the spirit of previous eliminations on this island, I want both of you to pitch to me why I should take you to the final two."
"Thou just revel in the power dynamic," Hildegard scoffed.
"Is that the start of your pitch?" Godfrey asked.
Hildegard briefly panicked before clearing her throat. "Well, clearly I am in little shape to be performing any difficult tasks. As thou said before, sweet Wisdom has had more time to recover, and 'tis not as though she is unable to win a challenge. Thou knowest what sort of pain I am in. 'Twould be a fairer match."
Godfrey nodded. "Wisdom?"
Wisdom took a deep breath. "Well, even if Hildegard is in more pain now, will whoever faces you not be able to sleep it off? Does it really make any difference that I dropped out before she did? Besides, even though we've had a rocky past couple of rounds, we've worked together in the past, you know? We've had friendly chats about our feelings and stuff, remember? I... I guess that's all."
"Well, those pitches did skew me a bit," Godfrey admitted. "Not by much, though. I think I'm going to go with what my gut had already been telling me to do."
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"Congratulations-" Godfrey cut himself off. "Ugh, I really can't decide. I keep on second-guessing myself."
"Well, you'll have to pick somebody. Tonight, preferably," Chris instructed flatly.
"Wisdom," Godfrey said. "My gut says to take Wisdom with me. That's my final choice. I've already changed my mind about it, but I've made my choice, and I have to stick with it."
Hildegard buried her face in her hands and wept.
"Please, take it easy, alright?" Wisdom urged Hildegard as she rubbed her back supportively. "You need your rest, alright?"
"I'm sorry, Hildegard," Godfrey said.
"So, to clarify and make it official: you are choosing to eliminate Hildegard?" Chris made sure.
"...I am," Godfrey confirmed.
"...I deserve this," Hildegard choked up. "I betrayed those who trusted me the most. Perhaps this is the Lord's will. Perhaps this is why I passed out."
Confessional:
Wisdom: So, wait... I made it to the final two?! I mean, I always figured the other two would take me if one of them won, but... No, this is not the time to doubt or second-guess myself. It's do or die right now. I just need to... go for it!
Godfrey, Wisdom, and Chris were all present as Hildegard stood by the Elevator of Losers.
"Good game, Hildegard," Godfrey said. "You were a worthy opponent, and a worthy ally for as short of a time as that lasted."
"You did great in this game. Third place is really good," Wisdom told her.
"Indeed, yet... it still hurts," Hildegard admitted. "Perhaps I must simply let time and prayer heal my wounds."
"Regardless of how it goes, thanks for playing!" Chris told Hildegard. "You certainly made the season more interesting by being here."
Hildegard smiled weakly. "I do appreciate that."
Hildegard entered the Elevator of Losers, and Chris lowered her down to the losers camp below.
"Congrats on making the final two, you guys," Chris told Godfrey and Wisdom. "Rest up for tomorrow's challenge. You're going to need it. Hehaha."
Confessional:
Godfrey: It was a tough decision, but ultimately, I do feel like Wisdom made better points than Hildegard. I was leaning towards taking Wisdom anyway, mostly because I just like her more than I like Hildegard, but you know what? Wisdom's right: Hildegard's just a bigger threat, all factors considered. Now I just need to win one more challenge. Let's do it.
Wisdom: It's pretty clear that Godfrey underestimates me. I guess that the most I've done to damage his game is making sure Hildegard took me to the final three instead of Virgil, huh? Well, either way, I'm in this to win it! I've made it this far, and I've had a few close calls along the way, but I am in the final two. Now I just need to win one more challenge. Let's do it.
Chris sat in the transport helicopter.
"After a grueling battle of endurance, we have our final two!" Chris announced. "Who will be our ultimate winner, and who will fall just short of joining the Total Drama hall of fame, not to mention the million dollars? It's the big one, folks! Tune in to the heart-pounding finale... of Total! Drama! Sh-Sh-Sh-SHUFFLE PARTY!"
Final Two:
Godfrey - The Mysterious Roboticist
Wisdom - The Question Asker
Eliminated Makani Island:
Hildegard - The Paladin
Virgil - The Sweet Tooth
Rhiannon - The Porn Star
Shadya - The Multi-Talented Braggart
Eliminated Apoy Island:
Ginger - The Snarky Robot
Nestor - The Total Drama Blogger
Gretchen - The Self-Proclaimed Protagonist
Bunko - The Ditzy Caricaturist
Elmer - The Brainy Boyfriend
Steve Jenkins - The Inflated Ego
Eliminated Kairi Island:
Dean - The Eternal Loser
Roxie - The Edgy Haiku Poet
Jeremy - The Passionate Mountaineer
Liberty - The Sleepyhead
Fred - The Energetic Blind Boy
Kun - The Insecure Leader
Eliminated Whenua Island:
Louise - The Brawny Girlfriend
Hiram - The Timid Mama's Boy
Kirkland - The Cynical Klepto
Rowan - The Lesser Target
Tegan - The Scene Girl
Jim - The Expecting Father
A/N: You remember how I mentioned that Steve Jenkins was going to go home before the first shuffle even happened, but I liked writing him so much, and the readers liked reading him so much, that I kept keeping him around? Real talk: the same is true of Hildegard. She was originally just going to be a fun, over-the-top gimmick character to keep the early episodes a bit more fun and lighthearted, but I think she served that role well enough that the rest of the story benefited from her continued stay in the game. She had big interactions with so many characters because she was a big character who was prone to interaction, and, though I feared that keeping up her ye olde speech pattern would get difficult or annoying over time, I surprisingly never tired of it.
Of course, I am physically incapable of writing an endgamer without at least a little bit of depth, so over time, Hildegard established herself with traits like being religious, struggling with having to make tough moves when she aims to be a holy knight, and tactless to the point where it affects her relationships with others. She wasn't a five-dimensional character with flawless development or anything, but she didn't need to be. But that's all my perception. What did you guys think of Hildegard?
Oh, and as is standard, I've set up a new poll asking which of the twenty-four contestants are your favorites!