Isabella
The trial ended after I collapsed at the stand. Victoria and Charlie brought me into the hallway where I could calm down. That man was a fucking idiot. I was not a drunk. I was not a partier- I hated drinking! Just a couple of stupid mistakes could ruin the whole trial and Jacob could go free. I did not want to have sex with Jacob and anyone that believed that was fucking dense.
"Don't believe what that man is saying, Isabella." my lawyer was trying to convince me. "Nothing he said was true. Like I said before, he's just trying to find your weaknesses."
I shake my head side to side. We weren't going to win this. It's over.
"It's only the beginning of the trial." she sighs. "Some days are good for us and some days are bad. You just have to keep believing. Can you do that for me?"
I shrug my shoulders. I don't know what to believe in anymore. I don't even believe in myself. That man smeared my name and I know what everyone thinks of me, it's not that hard to figure out.
"Isabella, snap out of this." Victoria said in a firm voice. "I'm not gonna let you think those thoughts. You and I both know that none of that stuff he said was true."
My vision blurs. I bite my bottom lip to keep myself from crying.
"Don't cry, Isabella." her hand rested on my shoulder and I turned myself to face her. Her lips were pressed into a thin line. She wasn't going to let me fall apart. Not over something that wasn't even true.
"Take deep breaths with me."
In and out. In and out.
My fingers tapped the bench. I gripped the arm rest willing myself to stop. I couldn't start this again.
One, two, three, four...
"I want to go home." I breathed. I dug my nails into the palm of my hand. My heart was beating to the rhythm of a drum and was only increasing. "Take me home."
Charlie, who'd been awkwardly standing to the side decided at that moment to try to be the caring father he never was. He and I were both awkward with physical affection. It just never was our thing. We were content with being silently acknowledging each other. He leaned down in front of me and grabbed my hand.
"Charlie, I really don't think that's a good idea-"
"I'm her father. I know what's best for my daughter!" Charlie interrupted her.
Neither of them noticed the spike in my breathing. I was crying. My vision blurred and tears ran steadily down my cheeks. There was pressure on my wrist. I couldn't move away. Charlie was squeezing tighter and tighter.
Five, six, seven, eight… let go. Let go. Let go.
"Charlie- let go."
My eyes flutter open. Carlisle is standing between the two of us with his hand on my dad's arm. He turns his head to stare at Carlisle with a shocked expression. Carlisle kept a hard glare, not letting go of Charlie.
"Carlisle, what…?"
"You're hurting, Bella. Let her go"
Charlie immediately drops his hand. I hug my arm to my chest and without thinking move closer to Carlisle.
"I'm sorry…" he was at a loss for words. His face was pale white as I trembled on the bench. I didn't want to be afraid of my own father. He didn't mean to hurt me. Sometimes he just acts before he thinks.
"I'm sorry, sweetie." his voice had gone soft. It looked like he was about to cry.
I was now standing beside Carlisle, slightly hiding behind his body. My hair hung in my face and I didn't bother to push it back. Esme stood at my left and she had her arm tightly wrapped around my shoulders. I leaned into her warm embrace and look away from Charlie. This was embarrassing. I freaked out over the littlest of things. I didn't want people to have to step on eggshells around me.
"Do you want to come to our house for a little bit? Just to calm down?" Esme softly asked.
I wanted to say yes, her offer was tempting. This had been a stressful day and all my father talked about was the trial. But I knew that I couldn't stay away forever. I couldn't keep running away from my problems. I had to eventually face them, no matter how terrifying.
"Thank you for the offer," I pause, "but I think I should head home."
There's a silent understanding between the two of us. She nods her head and asks, "will you be ok? We're always a car ride away if you need us. I know today was stressful."
"I'll be fine." I wring my hands around and around. Did I really believe that? No. Did Esme believe me? No.
ooOoo
I've been in bed for the past two hours doing nothing but stare at the ceiling. After a tense car ride home, I went straight to bed. It was the middle of the day but I was tired as fuck. Was it normal for me to be lying in the darkness? Or was I just a fucking depressed person with no social life?
I wanted to scream from the rooftops. I wanted to march up onto that stand and tell the whole fucking court room what really happened. I wanted to look at Jacob in the eyes and not be afraid.
I wanted people to want me, believe me. Edward believed me. I haven't talked to him in five months. I think about calling him everyday. My finger hovers above his name but everytime I back down. I'm pathetic. Would he even answer? Or is he busy with his new college friends? Does he have a girlfriend? We technically didn't break up. I had a mental breakdown and he fled. It was like I was satan or something. Edward wanted nothing to do with me. I couldn't bother him with my problems.
But if Edward were here right now, he'd be telling me to get off my ass. He'd want me to live my life to the fullest and not let anything stop me. I couldn't be sad and miserable forever. Maybe he was right though? That was no way to live life.
My hair falls in front of my face as I push myself up from the bed and with a reluctant sigh, I force myself to walk down the stairs.
Emmett's on the phone and doesn't look up when I walk past the kitchen. He's talking to Rosalie. She's at Rochester University in upstate New York but they call each other every chance they get. She's coming back for the trial. She and Emmett are both testifying. She asks about me everyday but I still couldn't bring myself to talk to her since the… incident. I know that she meant well, always checking up on me but I was mortified. Rosalie Hale saw me at my lowest point and she was perfect in every way. But she didn't judge me. She understood. I don't know how she could but she did.
The sound of the doorbell broke me from my thoughts. I had been standing here for the past two minutes. Emmett turns around but I'm already gone. Without bothering to check who it was, I yanked open the door.
It's Angela.
She's awkwardly standing at the door, looking around as if she were lost. I stare at her as if I've seen a ghost. Her brown eyes widen at the sight of me. How long had it been since we last spoke to each other?
"Bella." she breathes. Her chest rises up and down. I can feel her anxiousness as if it were my own. Her hand twitches and she twirls the ends of her hair around her fingers. She looked different. She looked older- like she had matured.
"I've been wanting to see you for a while, but I know you probably hate me and I understand if you want me to leave, but I needed to talk to you just this once." she says all in one breathe.
Angela stops and waits for me to say something. I say nothing. I have nothing to say. Victoria said that I shouldn't waste my time on people who hurt me. I should rise up and be the bigger person. What would Victoria say if I slammed the door in her face?
"Bella?" she gulps. "Please… please say something."
"What do you want?" my voice is cold and emotionless.
At one point I would have begged for her to take me back. I would have gotten on my hands and knees. But I'm a new person. I'd rather have no friends than a shitty one.
"I need to know the truth. Did Jake actually r-rape you?" her voice shook. I could see the look in her eyes that she already knew it was true. There was no question about it.
"What do you think?" my voice was full of venom.
Angela suddenly lets out a sob. She was trembling so hard that I was afraid she would collapse. She covers her mouth with a shaking hand, trying to calm herself down. I do nothing but watch. Did that make me a bad person?
"I-I'm sorry." she launches herself at me causing us both to stumble backwards Her arms are wrapped tightly around my neck. She's crying even harder now. I can smell a faint scent of her favorite perfume. It tickles my nose. My arms hang limp at my side.
Get off me. My jaw clenched and hands tightened into fists.
She lets go and takes a step back. Her eyes were red and puffy and she wouldn't stop sniffling. "I'm the shitiest friend. If I had known what he did then I wouldn't have done any of that. I should have known- why didn't I know?" she mumbled to herself.
"It's not your fault. It's not anyone's except Jacob's." I spit his name.
Angela's guilt written, I can see it all over her face. Something else is bothering her.
"What's wrong?"
She looks away from me and says in a quiet whisper, "I agreed to testify against you at the trial-"
"What?" my face turns an even paler shade of white. That couldn't be. Angela wouldn't. She couldn't! She was my friend- my best friend. It's as if all the air had been sucked out of the room. I was speechless. Tears ran down her cheeks. She stepped toward me forcing me to take two steps back.
"How could you?" I screamed in a strangled voice. "Do you know what it's like to be called a whore? Do you know what it's like to lose everyone you thought you trusted?!"
"Bella-"
"GET OUT!" I couldn't control my anger any longer.
"Please let me explain-!"
Angela gasps. Her head twists to the side as my hand connects with her cheek. She slowly looks up at me with wide eyes. What the fuck did I just do?
"Bella." a voice says from behind me. It's Emmett. He places his hand on my shoulder- a silent warning to behave.
"I think you should leave, Angela. I suggest not coming back anytime soon." his voice was calm and steady but I could feel his anger. He didn't have to tell her twice. Angela gave me one last look before taking off.
ooOoo
Jacob was clever and manipulative. He played the innocent boy, claiming that he didn't know any better. He didn't know that I didn't want to have sex because I never said no. He didn't think that qualified as rape. Jacob cried on stand and pleaded for my forgiveness. He stared at me with his big brown eyes- begging me not to ruin his life.
Mine already was.
Jacob was just a lost kid who had made a huge mistake. He denied ever having sex at La Push Beach. He said that he never touched me at my birthday party. He said that I was the one that supposedly tried to kiss him in a drunken daze and he tried to stop me. That's why I remember him being in bed with me- because I pulled him into my bed.
What a load of bull.
It didn't help that I had almost no memory of the events because I was drunk. All I could do was sit there and listen to his lies. Angela sat across from me but I refused to acknowledge her. You wouldn't have been able to tell that I slapped her yesterday. Everything seemed normal.
They called Angela up to the stand. Emmett had to put his hand on my knee to stop me from going after her. It wouldn't look good for our case if I were to suddenly attack her. She had on a little black dress and her hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail. She looked everywhere but at me.
"I'm aware that you, Jacob, and Isabella are best friends. Am I correct?" the lawyer asked.
She nodded her head. "We used to be best friends."
"How long?"
"We met when we were six years old. I'd say about for ten years we were friends." she mumbles and looks down at her lap.
"So it's fair to say that the three of you were very close?"
"We were never apart. We spent almost every day together."
The man hums and paces back and forth with his hand on his chin. "During those ten years of friendship, did you ever witness any negative feelings between Jacob and Isabella? Or predatory behavior?"
Angela pauses and shakes her head side to side. "We were just kids. How could we have known what rape was?"
"I agree but Isabella claims it happened. You must know her better than anyone else. You were at her house the day the first assault allegedly took place. Do you remember any odd behavior from either Jacob or Isabella?"
"We were just studying for our upcoming math quiz. It was like any other day. I was sitting on the ground and Jacob and Bella were on the couch next to each other. We studied for about an hour until I was called home."
"So it was just a normal summer Friday afternoon. The three of you hung out for a bit before leaving to go home."
"Yes sir." she gulps. I can see that she's sweating and her hands are shaking. It looked like she was about to be sick.
"When was the next time you saw Isabella?"
"About three weeks later." she had to think for a moment. "I had tried texting her but she didn't respond."
"What was Isabella like?"
Angela responds in a quieter voice. "She wasn't as talkative. Bella was really distant and all she wore was sweatshirts and long pants. She looked absolutely miserable. I tried to be understanding and not push her but things just seemed to get worse."
"How did they get worse?"
"She started skipping class and would come back the next day looking like a complete wreck. Bella was always the best at school and then all of a sudden she seemed to just be failing everything. I thought it would cheer her up if we went to the party at La Push beach but that's when everything took a turn for the worse."
"What happened?"
"Bella originally wasn't going to go but I convinced her too. I had just started dating this boy and so when we arrived at the party, I went off with him. The last I recalled was Bella sitting by the campfire. I felt guilty for leaving her but she said it was alright."
"Was Jacob at the party by this point?"
"No." she sighs. "I didn't see Bella until an hour later when she was passed out drunk in her brothers car. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Bella wasn't one to drink so I was really worried. I do know that the last person to see her was Jacob. He said that he watched her go off with some guy into the woods. At the time, we all believed him."
The man paused. His eyes flicker from Jacob to me to Angela. He taps his finger against his leg and looks directly at Angela.
Something wasn't right.
"We were aware that the two of them went off together, but you're telling me that Mr. Black said a different boy did?"
"Yes, sir." she confidently states. "I remember everything as if it were yesterday. Jacob got all upset when he saw Bella unconscious and Emmett started yelling at him for letting Bella go off with some random guy."
Everyone was silent. Even Jacob looked nervous. Nobody knew quite what to do.
ooOoo
Author's Note:
Hey y'all! Thank you all for reading and reviewing! Your support means so much to me! I didn't get very many reviews for the last chapter so I'm not sure if you read it but to sum it up the last chapter was the first part of the trial and the jump to junior year. This chapter is the second part.
I always want to make aware some reviews from last chapter. Someone said that the chapter was all messed up and confusing, but if anyone ever bothered to read the Author's Notes, you'd know that this fanfic doesn't follow an orderly timeline. It jumps from day to day and month to month and year to year. Not everything is going to line up perfectly with each other. I hope that has cleared up some confusion for some people!
I should update again soon and the next chapter will probably be the last day of the trial. I know that this chapter may have seemed kind of repetitive to the last one but there was a reason for that.
Thank you all and happy holidays to everyone celebrating!