Chapter 23- To Be Continued?!
I'm bbbbbbaaaaaacccccckkkkkkkkk! Hello my lovelies. After taking a slight reprieve from the one shots I'm back and ready to kick off another leg of our little adventures together. Because it's been a minute since we've connected and shared, I though I'd take the reigns for this chapter, set us off once again. Now I'm sure by now you all are aware of the season 7 fall finale. Finally, after sever years our time has finally come. We're getting legitimate Jay whump. Who's as excited as I am?! And as splendid and hectic as the fall finale was, January 8th looks to be that much more. More drama, more whump, more uncertainty, more of everything.
Now of course you knew I had to take a stab at this one. I cannot wait any longer, it's time to dissect things, begin to interpret what all could go down next month. I'm going to go ahead and say this is all an interpretation, as all fan fiction really is. Based on the fall finale episode and the preview for the January episode, this is what I think could, will, and hope to see happen. I could be completely wrong, semi correct, we'll just to wait a few more weeks to find out. So, without anymore delay, let's dive right in. We're picking up immediately from where the fall finale ended. Here we go!
For once in her life she wished she went against better judgement, been the bad, jerky partner in their duo. Because had she not listened to Jay and stay with the guy he'd just taken down perhaps the thing that just happened below her wouldn't have played out in the way it had. She was just wrapping up a report to the team, to dispatch her findings and needs, perched over the splayed body when the shot propelled itself into the atmosphere, landing somewhere rather precious. The surprise of it all, the depth and layers of the noise seeming to pierce her very being, when her senses told her that shock and awe was going down under her. Her entire body jolted, from her scalp to toenails everything came together and released, the tiniest of squeaks coming out of her as a result. Things were supposed to be safe, cleared, over. She rescued her partner, had him in her grasp mere seconds ago, this couldn't, shouldn't, wasn't what was to follow next. She was on her feet, at the top of the stairs with shaky soles as she called out for her partner, just beginning to know what wasn't coming.
"Jay?!" You could pick up that something was moving, shifting and shuffling before some amount of body weight hit the ground. As she descended two more steps the faintest sound of air went out, human made to be exact. It was so quiet, but the fear, pain, shock behind it had Hailey picking up her speed.
"Jay, talk to me," she called out once again, hoping more words would earn her a grunt, something. But as she reached the bottom of the steps, turning to the location her partner spent the last day, life came to a halt. It was as if invisible cement was keeping her in that place of the building, eyes recording the horror with the brain going entirely blank. Jay was on his back on the ground, chest donning a new blood spot. His right hand was hovering over him, like it wanted to land but was being told to hang on. The chest was trying to do it's most basic of tasks. Inhales were minuscule, baby puffs coming out right after. His eyes were tiny slits at the moment, seeming to be battling the unconscious/alert war. To the right of him was Angela, lying on her side and clutching a really large bloody place on her. There was a gun about a foot in front of her, handle facing her with the firing end going in Jay's direction. Jay, gun, Angela. Angela, gun, Jay. That's when it all clicked, this realization seeming to be the ticket that sprung Hailey free of her restraints.
"Stay with me, Jay," Hailey coolly told the expiring body as she made her way to Angela, securing the gun in her waistband before working towards Jay. He was shivering, pain filled gurgles now taking over the breathing tasks. Hailey dropped to her knees, grabbing the suspended hand and death gripping it.
"Jay, you have to stay with me." He didn't respond, didn't even make an attempt to nod or blink or give any bodily response to her. He was clearly in shock, both from a medical and mental perspective. The blood stain on his chest was growing ever wider, darker, and scarier by the heart beat. Despite the fact that the target was Jay and the shooter was hurt themselves, the shot was a good one, certainly ranked in the 'kill shot' range. It was in a vital location, it's endpoint one causing great trauma. The more Hailey stared the tighter her throat got. One doest realize how much blood the human body can hold. Certainly you hear the number in school and can see the evidence of it at a crime scene, but to see a living body quickly expel all it's contents, with little to no barriers of exit, it puts things in a whole other perspective. Jay was bleeding out, dying right under her. He needed a hospital, an OR, and machine that would temporarily stop everything in an effort for him to be saved. But instead they were alone, in a basement of a warehouse dozens of miles away from help without so much as a gauze pad to slow things down. Hailey balled her coat up in her hand and pressed hard, those tears that were once in her throat dropping out of her eyes now.
"Stay with me, Jay," she prayed again, smiling as she watched the non-swollen eye flutter to a close.
"Dammit, Jay! You're not dying on this floor. You need to hang on for just a little bit. C'mon. I know you're tired but you can't sleep right now." All body weight was utilized now, her extra pump of pressure doing enough to stir one eye open.
"Good! Good job, Jay." Angela was saying something, shouting out curses and hatred for Jay, but the words were muffled syllables in Hailey's world. It was just her and Jay, the two of them with a single goal: getting to level ground. Hailey's radio crackled that help was here, needing to know her location in order for them to get to her. It was at that moment she realized she didn't tell them what happened, but dared to not lose focus on the person under her. So instead she screamed, yelled a location till her throat cracked.
"Help is here, Jay. Stay with me." Again, nothing from the person under her just more delayed blinks and small pants now. Hailey swore she saw something red in the corners of his mouth, that one sending chills. Commotion stumbled its' way down the stairs in the form of Adam, Voight, and paramedics for the two people.
"Oh God," Adam declared as he got the first glimpse of things. Hailey just nodded, not daring to budge till someone with medical training told her to. While Voight and Adam stood in the doorway dumbfounded, a pair of medics brushed past them, practically yelling for Hailey to clear room for them to work. She did as was told, scooting away on her rear end and into a ball, forehead meeting her knees as the story of the future began to be read aloud to the world.
"Halstead took it to the chest," Adam called over the radio.
"Clear a path for us and start blocking off intersections between here and Med. He needs to go now. Get a 10-1 protocol going now."
"GWS to the chest. Bullet is still in there," a medic alerted the group as they rolled Jay back onto his back.
"Can't tell if it hit the heart but it's close. He needs to go now. Alert Med were coming in with a bad one." When Hailey looked up Jay was no longer visible to her. People, a lot of people were around and above him, all giving those looks of wishful thinking or false hope. Rising to her feet gave her a better look, watching in helplessness as they plopped him on a gurney, the oxygen mask, and discarded bloody gauze pad acting as pushbacks for her. In the span of seconds he looked so much worse, marching that much closer to the end of things. She inhaled, choked on a tear, and then advanced towards the exit. If this was the end of things, she wasn't going to be a bystander of it all.
"Stay with us," she told him as they made their way up the steps. A hard hand squeeze from her got a wince from him, Hailey looking away from the step to the face under her. She smiled, he blinked. It was the only and last time they communicated that day.
Sunlight was the last thing Jay saw that day. The adjustment from the crappy basement lighting to the world's most powerful power source had him squinting before going totally limp. He made it to seeing the white and all its' splendor, fulfilling that unspoken promise to not have that musty, damp, blood dripping place be his final view of the world. Hailey stepped aside as Jay was loaded into the ambulance, doors being shut on the group as it sped towards the one place that could save Jay. Hailey stood in the middle of the street, listening to the sirens wail into the city, a mixture of ambulance and police sirens alerting Chicago one of its' occupants was on the brink of exiting, checking into a another place for the rest of time. Tears were pouring down her face as she viewed the caravan make the right hand turned and disappear.
The scene seemed to exhale. Turning around the face the building Hailey couldn't help but see things had relaxed, like they'd played their role in the conclusion of Jay Halstead. He was alive when he was under their purview, whatever else happened was out of their control. Angela was being loaded into her ambulance at this point, not be awarded the procession and police salute that Jay received. Hailey noted the handcuffs clasped to the gurney's handrail, smirking in small satisfaction over that. A once over of the place had Hailey thinking deep, dark thoughts. Whatever happened today this place was forever cursed, marked as a dark place. Apart of Jay Halstead died at this place today. Whether it was his entire being or a version of him at one point in time, that essence of Jay Halstead would never find it's way to higher ground, forever be imbedded in that cramped space some two stories below the earth. This day would forever change him, act as the crossroads of things. The coming minutes and hours would steer him in a certain direction, but this place, that room became the springboard for things. In that moment Hailey wanted to vomit, run home and pack her bags and never look back, but a wiser force interrupted her plans.
"C'mon, let's get over there. Will's going to want answers," Voight nudged her, walking towards the car before hesitating at the passenger side. Hailey was met with a choice: run into the scary unknown or flee for safety and forgetfulness. Despite the protesting inside her, the choice was surprisingly clear.
…
Perhaps the best way to describe pulling up to Med is a haunted house or maze. From far away the exterior looks innocent, perfectly normal and just like all the other buildings and structures surrounding it. But as you approach the front door things begin to shift. The hairs on your arms start to pick up, one of the body's amazing censoring systems preparing you for something unpleasant that will scare the life out of you. Cars, people, things were once assumed as normal and in line with the aesthetic now begin to scare you, bringing you to that moment of fear and wrath before things are let down. As Hailey and Hank made their way to the ED entrance, this strange and poignant occurrence was well underway within them. Venturing away from the parking lot and walking past the ambulance bay, Hailey noted that Jay had arrived some amount of time ago, the emptiness of the vehicle and stillness to it proof that the occupants were still inside. Hailey did the horrible thing of peering into the back of the rig, thinking that would help in some strange way. But instead of putting her at ease, the overall bloodiness of the space had her stomach in her throat, a gag falling out when she noticed the blood all over the oxygen mask that he once wore.
"Let's go," Voight gruffly called to her, Hailey deciding to not inquire about the emotions in his voice. Hailey hesitated another second at the ambulance, swallowed the fear that Jay got progressively worse since their last encounter, and moved on. What greeted them on the other side of the ED doors went right along with the mood of a horror house: pandemonium.
For starters the place was jam packed with people, police officers to be exact. Think rush hour on the subway in the middle of the summer. You couldn't move around to save your life, much less sit anywhere. Overall, the gathering of cops for one of their fallen own is beautiful, a stunning reminder that they all were a family. Their roles and rankings were vastly different, but at the end of the day they all lived under one blue roof. Certainly in the coming hours and days this stunning portrait of family would resonate with Hailey, Voight, and the rest of Intelligence, but for today it was chaos in its' purest form. Hundreds of voices shouting, shaking, spreading ten thousand rumors that varied in story and gravity. It certainly was a buzz but those pushing past the crowd grew to hate the noise. The tone was death, the stories seeming to be farewell speeches, examining the likelihood of Jay making it another hour. Hailey wanted to cry, scream, tell them all to run for the hills, but some small voice in the form of Jay's voice told her to let it go. They were uninformed and his finality wasn't up to them. Hailey practically slapped the ED doors when she reached them, Maggie shaking her head as she granted her access.
"I'm sorry about all of them. They started all that racket in here and I practically had to shove them in there." Hailey shook her head, swallowing as she inched closer to the woman.
"Where is he?"
"Trauma three. Surgeons are already down in there. I think it would be best if you hung back here."
"It's that bad?" Maggie nodded. Hailey pushed, gazed into her face to search for any amount of BS or lies. She failed to detect any.
"Come sit over here with me." Maggie pointed to a chair next to hers. Hailey slowly slinking around the counter and hovering over the seat, knowing what was coming the second she allowed herself some amount of rest. She closed her eyes, opening to blurry vision as her body relaxed.
"Where's Will," she whispered.
"Sharon had him in her office till someone called for Rhodes. It was awful. He ran down here, looking rather mad and beside himself. He's in there with Jay. Sharon tried pulling him out but he gave her this look that I have never seen before."
"Damn."
"Yeah…" Maggie trailed off, the two of them watching the drawn curtains. With the ability to see mercifully shielded from them, the reliance on other senses had to be utilized. Smelling was out the window, thankfully, but the noise coming from that way was enough to make your skin crawl. For starters the tune of the heart monitor, it's increased speed and irregular beat showcasing to the world that Jay's heart was unwell, in the midst of a good battle with the grim one. From there shouting and commands from doctors was serious, the tone veering on panic. Whoever was talking was trying to be calm in a situation that was all too quickly becoming out of control. Every now and then you'd hear protesting, someone telling another person to get out or step back. That was the one time Hailey smirked the entire day, figuring out it was Will getting in the way or telling people how to do their jobs, a very Halstead thing to do.
"Do you know anything," Hailey eventually asked, trying to distract from the truth that Jay had been in that closed off room much longer then any of them would've liked.
"No," Maggie spoke through a shaking head.
"I know they brought in a thoracotomy tray but other then that…"
"Thoracotomy?"
"Chest tube procedure. He lung was probably filling with blood and they had to relieve it, insert the chest tube to help re-inflate the lung." Hailey nodded, feeling the bile makes its' quick trip north. Her mouth was open, about to ask more into this painful sounding procedure, when the curtains were drawn, doors flying open as both women rose from their places. He looked dead, the paleness and amount of crap on him all but solidifying that first thought. It was glimpses, freeze frames of him in between the arsenal of people pushing him to the next level of awaiting help. Hailey's assumption of Jay being intubated was correct, the blood around the tube and mouth gave away that he gagged on blood before receiving the breathing assistance. He wasn't clothed, wasn't awake, and didn't look to be in any form of pain, which honestly scared more then comforted. Pain meant living, fighting, want. In that nanosecond look at him, Hailey swore she saw wavering, peacefully slipping away into the forever. But that wasn't the worst part about the whole thing. Because the medium sized, blue surgical towel draped over the chest region is what had the feet picking themselves up.
"Hailey!" Another couple steps were taken, trying to catch up with the stampede headed for the elevators.
"Hailey!" That one was a bit louder that time, doing the trick of stopping her in her place. She couldn't get here eyes off of it, racking her brain of her very limited medical knowledge to determine what was going on under that towel.
"You don't want to see that," Maggie called to her, that being enough to tell the story. Hailey spun around, suddenly unable to look at Jay. She heard the elevator open up and the gurney and people scoot on, the doors closing in their silent way as the horrific adventure moved to another floor. Stopping at the trauma room a thought struck Hailey: this was all she did in life. She was never there at the exact moment people needed her. She was always just a second behind, the person that came in after destruction had run its' course. Her simple minded self thought she was helping people, giving them peace through the worst times of their life. But in actuality she was too late to do any good, a hair behind things to actually make a lasting positive impact on anyone. All she was good for was answering questions that people already knew the truth to. She could investigate Angela all day and night, it wasn't going to change the fact that Jay was forever changed today…or worse.
"You shouldn't go in there," Maggie called out to Hailey as she breached the trauma room's square footage, standing there to observe. The first thing that stood out was the discarded clothing in the left corner of the room, the blood stains, dirt, and odd shape to them told her they were removed in haste, probably cut off. The boots were actually at her feet, near the entrance of the place. Connecting the dots shoes were yanked off first before he was transferred to a hospital gurney before undergoing the patient transformation. The room's stench was blood, the floor coated in the substance. Hailey took a step, noted how many bloody gauze pads, syringes, and instruments were thrown on the floor. A life was here, its' essence lingering in this small space of the world. A person was here, Hailey at this point unsure if it that was a past tense or hopeful future thought. A loud exhale made her jump out of her skin for the second time today, head swiveling to the left in search of the sound's source. The room was dimmed, someone taking the extra step of shutting the lights as they rolled out of here. The figure was balled up on the floor, outline telling Hailey everything.
"Will?!" He looked at her, his face somewhat obscured but she figured he was crying.
"What the hell just happened?" There was anger, sorrow, fear in that phrase. Hailey wasn't sure how to answer. She wasn't familiar with Will in this stage, not entirely confident how he'd react if she opened her mouth. The only thing that came to mind was a hug, which Will accepted without hesitation. The two of them sat there balling, deeply feeling all that they had bottled up for a time. Hailey would blurt out apologies and Will would nod in return. It was a sweet moment, a breath they both needed to take. Will was the first to pull away, jam the sides of his hands into his eyes as he stood. A hand was extended to help Hailey rise and she accepted.
"I need to go update everyone. They're going to want to know." Will's whole countenance changed. Gone was the emotional family member, he was back in doctor mode. Again, another side of the Halstead family. They could flip things on and off effortlessly and be rather convincing.
"Will, if it's too much. Someone else can do it. We can ask Maggie, Sharon.."
"-No. I'm fine." Like she hadn't heard that a million times from the other brother.
"I was here. I know what's going on. It needs to be me." Hailey nodded, allowing Will to walk in front of her to the waiting audience. She never felt so sorry for someone in her life.
…
When someone important walks into a room you're supposed to rise from your seat, give them your unwavering attention. It's a sign of respect, a gesture to express your happiness to see them or desire to hear what they have to say. So it was humorous, in a way, to see the exact opposite happen when Will entered the crammed and swirling waiting room for the first time. The rambling and deep yet shallow conversations didn't cease, no one seemed to notice that the single family member was standing at the doorway, hands shaking and mouth unable to expel a word. Voight first noticed Hailey, following her pointing finger to the nervous and upset Will Halstead.
"Everyone shut up," he yelled to the circus, silence rippling across the room in no time. From there they all sat, taking that unique way of showing respect. Voight rose from his place, walking up to Will and hugging him, whispering something no one could pick up. A moment or two later the men backed away, Voight keeping within arm's length. Will took a breath, closed his eyes, and began the rundown.
"He's in critical condition and is probably just getting underway with surgery. He, uumm, flatlined on the way here. It was for a couple minutes but they were able to get him bak. X-ray shows the bullet hit off his rib cage, bouncing it through a portion of the left lung before resting very close to the heart. We don't think it hit the heart but certainly hit a few major arteries. However, with the amount of blood loss it's not certain till they open him up and get in there. You guys are more then welcome to hang out but just a warning, it's going to be awhile." Will nodded, letting everyone know he was done. There wasn't a witty one liner or strung together words of encouragement. It was the facts and nothing else. If anything it only made things worse, the dangerous bad far outweighing the potential good that could come out of this day. Hailey leaned over to rest her hands on her knees, head relaxing against her chin. She felt a hand brush her back and she just nodded.
"You need to sit," Will whispered.
"Did he code again," she asked? She knew he was the last person to ask, but she couldn't get that final snapshot of Jay out of her mind.
"Yeah." That was all she needed, the final piece to know the secrets of the blue cloth. Will guided her to a chair that was cleared just for her. Hailey did her best to smile, put on some form of a brave face. Will squeezed her shoulder a final time before turning back towards the ED.
"I know this is a stupid question right now, but is he going to be okay," Voight asked? Will turned to face the man, noting that behind the rugged and gruff exterior was a nervous person terrified for someone lying on a table some three floors above them. Will swallowed, ready to tell the truth but not sure how to put it mildly.
"We'll know more if…when he gets out. Again, it's probably going to be awhile. They've got a lot of work ahead of them." It was at this second that Will's phone buzzed in his pocket. He assumed it was a text message from Sharon, Maggie, or someone not in this room expressing their concern for Jay. So as he looked down at the message the sender had him mentally on his knees. It was the phone line from the OR requesting his presence immediately.
"I've gotta go," Will mumbled, tripping over his feet as he began to pick up the pace. He heard the calls for him and people trying to encourage him. But all this was second to the do-or-die, grand bartering he was mentally doing with eternity on his brother's behalf. The request for him was so unexpected and rare, whatever was going on was dire.
…
There are certain life events that family shouldn't see, let alone walk into. For example, each other going to the bathroom. Certainly it can be talked about, but should never be seen by anyone other then themselves. Another comedic yet traumatizing example would be the conceiving of a younger sibling, which of course Jay told Will about one day when they were young adolescents. A run into their parent's bedroom after a bad nightmare had him stumbling into another horrific sight he'd soon never forget. But on top of these examples is surgery. There's a reason there are so many layers between pre-op waiting areas and the actual room where things would go down. As a family you ought to know what will go on with a loved one and certainly be on the same floor as that person endures something altering. But it is something no one should ever see, regardless if said family members are in the medical field. There's a reason family members aren't allowed to work on or operate on family members, it's too much for one person to handle, it drastically changes things. So Will completely understood the looks and attempts at stopping him the closer he got to the room. If anything he wanted to turn around, flee to some quiet place where he forget the hellish day for just a moment. But Jay needed him, Rhodes needed him for some mysterious reason.
As he inched ever closer to the OR his whole body slowed down. The thought of literally gazing at his brother under the caring hands wielding a scalpel and other instruments over and inside his chest cavity sucked all energy out of him. Will made a deal with himself to stare at Rhodes and Rhodes alone. He couldn't look at Jay, no matter what. He kept his head down as he approached the prep station adjacent to the OR room. Will picked up that the lights were bright in the center of the place and felt the presence of a lot of people in the room next to him. Head was still lowered as he fiddled for the coms button and clicked it on.
"What," he shakily replied, fully aware he was either on the verge of a panic attack, tearful events, throwing up, or all of the above. Without leaving his spot in the room and refusing to slow down the rate of his work, Rhodes laid it all out.
"Left lung is not doing well. Even after the thoracotomy it's not inflating and the bronchial stem is damaged. On top of that the heart was hit. Left ventricle is the worst out of the issues, it's actually where the bullet finally stopped. Aorta was grazed but not completely severed but the LAD is torn. He's in bad shape right now. By the time we got bypass set up and him on it he lost another pint of blood. Even on volume he's low, borderline too low for all this repair."
"What are you saying," Will cut in before he expired on the floor?
"I think we need to remove the lung, giving him enough time for me to fix the heart issues. He can't stay under forever."
"Connor you know he can't work if he has one lung."
"Will, him working is the very last thing you should be worried about right now. We're talking quality of life, giving him a small chance of getting off this table alive." Will nodded in hesitant agreement. It was what the small voice told him ever since Jay was brought in: that today was his brother's last day as a cop. At first Will shook it off, told himself it was fear or uninformed ideas. But now it was all he could think of, realizing that this was a massive crossroads in a sea of tiny ones and he had to make the call. Will made the fatal mistake of looking up, eyes going to the very thing he swore he wouldn't look at. It took nanoseconds for the picture to register, the answer coming immediately afterwards. In the battle between life and death, there was only one answer.
"Do what you need to do." We've reached the point of Will becoming catatonic. As instructions were dealt and people started moving, Will was on the floor. As he rested the back of his head on the sink the tears were picking up size and speed, the heaving of his body to expel them almost making him gag, air not really coming in or going out, which was comical and poetic in a way. The thought of this being the final hours in the final room encompassed by the final day of another Halstead genuinely scared him. Will Halstead could not be the final Halstead in the world. He pulled himself into the tightest ball, doing his best to hug comfort into himself. He couldn't move, he couldn't leave. This was his place in the world right now. There was no way he was leaving his brother at the very end.
…
Seven hours later
"Will, it's done." He wasn't even aware he had fallen asleep, let alone splayed himself out on the floor. His whole body ached, Will swearing he'd be covered in bruises by the morning. He blinked a couple more times, each blink filling him in on his location. He saw the ceiling first, the sink and its' items next. A nudge from the OR nurse had him moving the extremities. It was in the pulling up to a standing position that he connected things, realizing that a nurse once helping his brother was now helping him. Cue the mild panic.
"Wait, where is he?! What happened?!" The nurse nodded her head, offering him a glass of water he turned to face the banned room yet again. The OR table was empty, a gurney housing a heavily blanketed body on it slowly being pushed out of the room. The protective layers of being a surgical patient were still on the person, it was the pump connected to tube going down into a mouth that had Will's body swelling with excitement, oddly enough.
"He's alive. Connor will fill you in once he's done." She lovingly slapped his back, almost like hard pat on the back. Will smirked, fully feeling the foolishness, desperation, tiredness, and every other wacky adjective to describe the last few hours roll off his being. While blissfully unaware of all that lay in front of him, and whoever else was effected by the events of the day, Jay was alive. That was reason enough to celebrate. Will had this sudden urge to move, run after Jay and his medical posse. Will knew that wasn't completely allowed or approved but, today's theme seemed to allow it. His hand was on the handle to freedom when Connor entered the room, clearing his throat in an effort to slow Will down.
"He's on his way to the Cardiac ICU. Just let them get him settled before you get up there." Will released his grip on the handle, turning to face Rhodes and a surprise second surgeon.
"Marcel?"
"So you really were out of it," the surgeon replied, which had Will raising his eyebrows.
"I asked for Marcel to assist so we could both work on things. It was really touch and go for awhile, the major arteries requiring a lot of attention, but he has two lungs still." Without delay Will walked over to the men and hugged them, creating a three person hug that had all of them chuckling before long.
"Now, he's not out of the woods just yet. We still need to get him at normal capacity and breathing on his own. He's still dependent on a lot of things right now."
"But he's alive," Will cut in.
"Yeah, he is." Will nodded, fighting off more tears and emotions. The relief rippling off of him was incredible.
"Can we discuss this upstairs?" Rhodes nodded, realizing he couldn't keep Will away for much longer. He took the lead, Will and Marcel taking up the rear. The three of them rode the elevator in silence, Will tapping his foot in anticipation while the surgeons' used the time to ponder, swallow all that went down for those numerous hours. The second the doors opened Will was off, doing this weird dance between normal walking and speed stepping, pushing his arms down towards his sides in an effort to slow himself down. Six doors down from the nurses' station was where things came to a halt, Will pausing as he took everything in. He was a doctor, he was fully aware of what major cardiac surgery looked like afterwards. But knowing it was a family member under everything changed things. The first surprise was the ICP monitor on the top of Jay's head. In his brief glimpse Will hadn't caught that, so to see it there, already in place, was a bit upsetting. Bringing to the forefront that on top of everything other deadly issue going on with Jay he could add brain injury to the list. Will was just beginning to understand the 'not out of the woods yet' comment. There was the usual amount of IVs and monitoring wires snaking out from under the hospital gown that was basically thrown on top of Jay. The breathing tube was still in place and now welcoming the full force breaths of a ventilator. There was very little of Jay that was not being monitored or free of medical devices. Jay was a mess, plain and simple. He looked dead, the lack of movements and shade of skin really hinting at this terrifying observation, but that wasn't the thing that Will was most concerned about. In fact, there were two things that stood out against all the others: the left eye and the number of blankets between Jay and the world.
"What's with the ICP monitor?"
"We don't know all that went down in that basement, but it's pretty obvious it started with a strike to the back of the head. Fortunately where he was hit just required a lot of stitches and stapling. Unfortunately his skull is cracked, pretty deep based on scans and the amount of blood he lost. He has some brain swelling but not enough to require surgery. It should go down in a week or so but he does have a pretty serious concussion. His vision will probably be blurry for a bit so he might need glasses till that corrects itself. The monitor is because we need to keep him in a medically induced coma but we also need to monitor if things get worse. It's for precautionary reasons." Will nodded, taking that first step into the room, eyes not leaving Jay as he found something to sit on. Once situated Will reached under the blankets for a hand, shocked at how freezing it was. He was scared, but gripped tighter. Finally, after hours of peril and fighting, here they both were on the other end of things.
"Hypothermia?"
"A mild case of it, yeah. Between wherever he was and the length of the surgery he's a bit below normal temps. It should get better in a couple hours. Tomorrow at the latest." Will turned away from the doctors and back towards his lifeless, unconscious brother. It wasn't the place or situation any of them had in mind for the day, but it was what they had and no one was taking it for granted.
"I'm going to have an optometrist come in and look at the eye in a few minutes. Just to see if it's bruising or if he needs more treatment."
"Okay." Will sighed, yet another doctor and another layer of medical personnel having to observe his brother today.
"Hang in there, Will. I'll be in to check on him in another hour or so."
"Can you update them? I don't want to leave."
"Of course," Rhodes and Marcel replied. Will thanked as they slinked their way out of the room. Finally, the two of them were alone. Will looked for a spot on Jay that wasn't covered in things, settling on the forehead and carefully placing a brotherly kiss on it.
"Thanks for sticking around for this long. Love you, Jay." Will wanted a hand squeeze, a quick smirk, some kind of response from the dark abyss. But instead he got zilch in return. A cruel and realistic reminder of the outcome that could still unfold before the day was finished.
…
The optometrist was deep in the swollen eye, via some medical device, when the masses arrived. Their nerves could be felt through the glass door, looks of shock and fear seeping in through the surface and bouncing off of Jay, Will, anyone who was in the room. It was Hailey at the very front of the pack, the rest of the unit sprinkled in between before other random people filled out the back. For a brief moment Will was mad they were there, waiting to join him in the waiting party. They'd only been separated for a few hours and in that time Will must've developed a bit of an isolation trait. In this moment of oddness he didn't want to share, hated that others had to be updated and sit next to him, both of them during this time. This was all so personal, highly sensitive stuff that both brothers were going through. Just the thought of a stranger, essentially, crashing their precious final moments really set him off. But before long Will shoved those thoughts and potential actions aside, told himself this was all apart of the healing process. The doctor was removing the inspection device from Jay's eye when Will waved people in. Hailey cocked her head, as if to ask if things were really for their viewing. Will nodded vigorously, waving the whole arm this time.
"It's definitely swollen but I don't see any structural damage. Just a really bruised and beginning the healing stages. It'll be black and purple in a day or so before going to those lighter shades. Things will look nasty for a couple weeks but the eye will heal on its' own. Whatever hit him was hard and had to have happened several times. You typically see cases like this in abuse situations."
"Yeah. So no surgery?"
"No. Unless things drastically change it'll be fine doing its' own thing."
"Okay. What about the concussion? Rhodes said because of the concussion he could be looking at glasses for awhile?" Hailey snapped her head up and stared at Will. Obviously they weren't filled in on that part of the report.
"That's a question for Abrams, not me necessarily but yes, there are cases where a concussion can be so bad that it temporarily damages the occipital lobe and this can cause vision issues. It could be a month, a week, several months. It's hard to tell at this point. But once things heal the vision should return to normal."
"Alright, thanks doc. I appreciate it."
"Absolutely. We're all pulling for him." The room kept filling in as the doctor left, leaving very little space for anyone to sit, stand, or do much beyond stare at the unconscious one in the bed. They all were shocked, that much was obvious. But the thing that stood out to Will was how differently they all showed it. Some were happy, relieved to be at this point, in this place, at this part of the day. Others were silent, depressed works of art. Their lack of facial expression or tears proof of that. Then you had the people somewhere in the middle; those who had hopeful fear or realistic thoughts. A thought struck Will as he watched the crowd: where did he fit into all of this? Which option resonated with him? At this exact moment he wasn't sure. Certainly he was relieved knowing that Jay had made it through surgery, but the odds were still not in Jay's favor. He couldn't help but feel this was the lull before things really took a turn to somewhere. Will couldn't stay in the room another moment, refused to parade people past his brother while he fought for everything. Again, the grieving process doing a number on him today. So as everyone took turns sitting next to Jay and speaking to him Will slipped out the back, resting against the nurse's station and gazing with proverbial smoke coming out of his ears. The anger was at full capacity at this point. Will wanted to scream, remind all of them that Jay was a person, not a freak show at the circus that one had to marvel over. He needed to rescue his brother from all of this. Will had to get away, find solace and reprieve in something outside of this cursed floor.
"Can you text me if anything changes?" The nurse sitting at the desk jumped out of surprise from the noise coming out of Will. It was definitely anger-driven, borderline biting his tongue as he spoke. She nodded while making the note on a sticky pad.
"When's the next check-in?"
"Thirty minutes." Half an hour. Enough time to find a place to let it all out. Save himself before having to attempt the same for his brother.
"Thanks. Don't let them stay forever. They don't really need to see this part of things." Before the nurse could ask where he would be Will was off. In this time there was only one thing that could rescue him from the demons within.
…
"Hello?! Will?!" A sound crossing between sorrow and a cow in agony was coming from the direction of the showers. Natalie was just coming in for her shift when the noise was registered in her ears. As she approached the door she was able to begin piecing things together. She was told of the day Jay had and the likely outcomes, but this was something people had failed to mention. The shoes outside the door told her it was Will on the other side, his lack of answering her knocks letting her know things weren't well. Hesitantly she opened the door, preparing herself for the news she dreaded the most.
"Will? It's Nat." The squawking and mourning stopped for a second, the timespan of a nose sniff. Natalie took that as her cue, tip toeing ever closer to the curtain before collapsing onto the floor. She placed a hand on the curtain, hoping the outline of her hand showed Will she was there for him, ready to help with whatever he needed. He seemed to have gotten the message because soon both were hand in hand, with the curtain in their way.
"I snapped and needed to run away." Natalie exhaled, cautiously asking the obvious.
"Snapped? Did something happen?" Will pulled his hand away from her's, the act quick and power behind it showing Will was still coming back down to things.
"With Jay? No."
"So what's wrong?" Will was sitting on the tile floor of the shower, back against the wall and body directly under the shower head. The warmth and rippling qualities of the water doing exactly what Will hoped it would: cleansing him. Ridding him of the bad with the good ever so slowly filling its' place. He needed this time to think. This brief period in the series of unforeseen events to absorb all that had taken place today. The sad cow cries were just the ugly escaping, peace and tranquillity greeting him shortly thereafter.
"I just started having really bad thoughts. I wanted to scream at them, even though this wasn't their fault. I just don't like that he's on display."
"Will, everyone reacts differently. I think if you told them this they'd understand."
"No. I just needed some time to think. Be alone for a time."
"Okay. How's he doing?"
"Not great. But it could be worse." Will's phone buzzed on the bathroom counter, a nice yet eerie reminder of things. Will asked Natalie to read the message as he finished up the showering process. She threw a towel over the shower wall as she read aloud.
"Rhodes is on his way up to check on things. Everyone but Hailey has gone home for the day. Hailey wants to know if it's alright if she can stay." Here was the first mini challenge: to share or to keep to himself. Will's rattled mind immediately went to one answer but realized there was really only one way of doing this.
"Tell them it's fine. I'm sure we could both use the company tonight." Will emerged from the shower wrapped in the towel, both doctors awkwardly standing on opposite ends of the room, neither sure what to do next. It was Natalie who approached first, embracing Will in a hug.
"You're now wet," he joked away the tears.
"It's fine. We're all pulling for him." She felt Will nod, squeezing a little harder before pulling away.
"Thank you," he replied.
"Of course. If you need anything.."
"-I know. Thanks, Nat. Seriously." Natalie's phone went off, the ED doesn't wait for it's personnel to be completely ready for things. She raced to the door, offering to visit when things died down at some point. Will was left to his own thoughts and actions once again. It was 7:27pm, three minutes before the first of many hurdles. The time for ideas and fear was in the past. Now it was time to get Jay all the way to safety.
The best way to describe the remainder of the day is a stunning orchestration of music. Like a concerto, the ebbs and flows were present, each having their moment along the way of events before the big finale. Things begin calm, the gentle changing of the notes on the piano put you in a trance, a sense of tranquility and reassurance. That things will be alright and that life can only go upward from that point. But soon the violins and cellos join in the piece, acting as the soft roar of the unknown. What was once under control appears to be the very opposite. What you once thought you knew all about turns upside down, leaving you to beg and plead for everything to stop. The music continues to build, taking you on this beautiful and alarming journey with no sign of adhering to your pleas. All you can do is sit and listen, pray for that calming beat of the piano portion, hoping at that moment you are with the one you love and that both are on the same side. Because by the time you reach the quiet, serene finale you are left wondering if what you were just witness to was a stunning work of art or an eerily horrific finality of things.
The calm portion of the concerto of Jay Halstead's night was set into motion when Will returned to the room, greeted by doctors, nurses, and Hailey all peering over the passed out one. The once anger-driven Will was replaced with a humorous one, finding the lifelessness to Jay comical, in a way. If only he could see what was going on around him, understand the level of care and concern that was being expelled on his behalf. Will somehow thought that Jay would get a kick out of it. The report from the first check-in didn't show any signs of improvements, but also didn't see him take that harsh turn for the worse. He was like the piano, calmly floating around in peace, seeming to not have a care one way or the other. For the next several hours the piano solo went on. Will and Hailey whispering to each other over the huffs and puffs of the ventilator or other life saving devices in the room. Their whispers soon becoming normal levels of communication. Jay was unconscious by medical interventions. There was no way he was going to be interrupted by them. If anything, it would be him doing the crashing of things. Which is where the night found its' first uptick of things, where the other instruments began to chime in. Hailey had left the room for seconds, minutes in search of coffee when the alarms went off. Where Will was once mutely replying to the hundreds of encouraging text messages now he was at Jay's side, both frightened and unsure what he was allowed to do.
"BP just spiked," he semi-calmly told the nurses as they flooded into the room. Sheets and hospital gown were thrown to the waist, Will getting his first glimpse of the handiwork a single bullet can do to the human body. The bile was there, the lightheadedness right behind, but Will only stood firmer in his place. He was not about to abandon Jay at this apparent pivotal moment.
"Page Rhodes," one of the nurses called out. Will jumping on it before anyone else. He had to do something at this point. It was in the ringing of the phone that things only got worse, more alarms going off and the heart monitor picking up its' pace.
"He's in PEA. Massaging the carotid." In record time Rhodes was in the room, asking for clearance. At this point Hailey had returned, face ghostly white as she stood outside in shock, begging that this moment didn't come just yet. She wasn't ready. No one ever really was in fact. Will noticed her but kept his vision on Jay.
"A round of epi and get ready to shock with the pacing wires." The assistants did as was told, the watching party jolting at the electric jolt running through Jay's body.
"Again," Rhodes called when nothing changed. However, unlike the first time things resumed their normal pace of things after this round of efforts. Rhodes kept two fingers on Jay's neck as he spoke.
"Alright, I think that was the first blood clot he's passed."
"First?!"
"It was a risk with this. We had to give him volume and we also had to give him a transfusion. It's not completely uncommon for the introduction of both things to have this effect on people. We're going to put him on a blood thinner for awhile but first we've gotta do a scan. Check and see if the CT is ready."
"So could this happen again," Hailey asked, both doctors remembering she was witness to all of this.
"That's what we're hoping to prevent with the blood thinner. But I have to warn you.."
"-It's going to put more strain on the heart," Will butted in. Rhodes nodded.
"There really isn't another option." News of the CT being free came into the room, Rhodes taking over the bagging task as the team and Jay were on the move. Will offered to come with but Conner reassured him it wasn't necessary, that Jay would be back within the hour. That left both Will and Hailey alone, the big space where a bed once was between them.
"How's he going to breathe," she asked after the group was out of sight.
"They've got a vent down there for situations like this. He'll need to be bagged between here and there, but he'll be fine." Hailey nodded, placing the cup on the floor before rubbing her face. It all came to a head, every sight, smell, and sound of the day finally catching up to her.
"At some point we're going to wake up," she laughed, Will sighing as the tears poured down her face.
"Something like that." The remainder of the time they sat, listened, distracted themselves till the bane of their day's existence returned. Once everything was back in place Rhodes gave them the rundown of his findings. It indeed was a clot that Jay passed, the deadly thing breaking apart before reaching the heart. For now things were slow but steady, Jay about endure some hard pumping for a bit but with hopes of something like that not happening again. The once dark and stormy music returned to the melodic entrancements that everyone grew to cling to. Hailey sat on the right side of the bed till she dozed into an awake trance, grasping Jay's hand the entire time.
…
"Hailey, he's not breathing right now and you need to get up." The voice was calm yet annoyed, level yet hinting at being on the verge of freaking out. It wasn't the first time the voice told her some variation of this message, but it was this pass of news that it finally clicked with her. Nodding as she looked around, it was apparent that the single note, high pitched whine wasn't some note of the symphony playing in her ear, but the sound of doom and peril ringing out in real life. When Jay returned after the first scare of the evening Hailey took a small place on the bed, grabbing a hand and just staring at the evil handiwork of a bullet. Picking a spot on him she'd stare for a rather lengthy period of time, eventually moving to another spot and repeating the process. Time wasn't a factor anymore. Hailey falling into a vat of daydreaming and floating. She didn't hear when Jay's oxygen levels dipped into the 80 percentages nor did she move when Jay's chest gasped for assistance from the outside world. So now, as she checked back in with reality, a legitimate panic attack was doing it's thing to her. Will gently pulled her off the bed as Jay was lowered to a completely flat position. As this was being done Hailey noted that Jay's upper half was covered in bloodlines, hovering right around where incision would've been.
"Why is he bleeding," she softly and numbly asked?
"It's from the blood thinner he's on. Pretty normal at this point." Will guided the two of them to a corner of the room, both watching as the vent hose was removed from the breathing tube as Marcel explained what could be the issue this time.
"Even with the 50/50 split of assisted breathing the left lung isn't getting enough air. Hopefully this will help things." The surgeon deflated the ballon at the end of the tube, waiting till the soft gag from Jay sounded out before moving to the next step.
"Rotating," he coolly replied as he gripped the clear tube and pivoted to the left about sixty degrees. Once Marcel positioned the tube in it's new place, a bag was reattached before he listened to breath sounds, everyone sighing a moment of relief as the oxygen levels ever so slowly began to tick upward.
"Now put him back on the vent." It was miraculous, watching everything resume its' normal status. Gone was the dread in the room. Farewell to Jay dying at 2:47AM. All was right with the world once again, for the most part.
"It's because of the ill functioning lung," Will announced as Marcel took things in.
"Yeah," he quietly replied.
"It's really not wanting to cooperate. We'll keep things on hold for right now, but long term.."
"-Yeah, I know. I still stand by things. He's got a chance we have to take it." Before long the room returned to its' three occupants status, Hailey now choosing a chair this round. The symphony returned to its' calm and collected rhythm once again. Another heightened moment was behind them. None of them aware of the big finale just beyond the horizon.
"So what did they just do?"
"After the chest tube, surgery to fix the damage from the bullet, and splitting the breathing capabilities equally between the two lungs, the left lung is still not functioning all that well. So they just rotated the tube so that more of the ventilator can help that lung inflate. It won't be for forever but it's not good that had to do that. They wanted to remove the lung during surgery but I may have fought for them to try and save it. In the moment it was an obviously easy call for them. He was bleeding out and had damage to a lot of other things. He could live with one lung. Except I knew that meant he'd never work in Intelligence…" Will trailed off at this point, clearly in an internal struggle with himself. You could see the questions of judgment dancing through his eyes, both sides of the debate darting back and forth.
"Well I'm sure Jay is thankful you told them to keep things together." Will just nodded, not looking up for his lap.
"I hope so." The music played on, the cellos taking a break as the flutes and piano re-took their place in center stage. All was going well. Life was looking to be on the up and up. It was a window of healing, restoring, quiet reflection. Oh how that would change before the sun came up.
…
From the get go this one felt to be different, the big one that was to decide it all. Survive and Jay would live to see another lifetime. Fail and the morgue would be the next destination. Neither of the visitors bothered to check the time, but it was just after 4AM. The once still room erupted at the sound of the four alarms chiming their goosebump inducing tune. What once was was no more, both Will and Hailey giving each other that look. The look of the end being upon them and there was nothing in their power that either could do to sway things. The dark cloud that was just off in the distance was under them now, the steady, heavy rains just hitting the tops of them. Cue the lower end of the piano and its' stringed friends. The tempo was picking up, the grand finale had arrived at last. All you could do was watch, listen, and pray.
"What's going on?" Will was at Jay's side in record time, hovering over him as he glanced up at the monitors.
"I don't know." The scariest thing of all was that Jay wasn't responding. There wasn't a single movement or hint of noise. He was a still, lifeless figure letting nature take its' course. Whatever happened would transpire, he was just going with the flow. Will hit the assistance button, realizing that task was foolish because Jay was on a high status, any activity was registered with the nurses who immediately paged for doctor-level help. The calvary was in the room in seconds, just beginning the diagnosing process. Will and Hailey were all but face planted into a wall of glass as people pushed their way to their positions.
"What happened," Marcel asked in a hurried way.
"It all started going off."
"No movement, sound, anything that suggested this would happen?" Will was about to answer when the heart monitor kicked into another gear, the speed the fastest it had been since Jay was first admitted. There was this brief moment of dread from everyone. As if to say this was the finality of Jay, that they'd reach the point of letting him go. Hailey mouthed a word, Will just spoke it.
"Shit." The two of them watched as the displaced surgical gown was thrown to the floor, Hailey turning out of fear. She couldn't bring herself to see the points where air met the insides, where hands dove in to rescue the one person that mattered most. Collapsing into Will's arms she sobbed, mourned the inevitable as everyone worked to drag Jay to safety once again.
"Is it another.." Marcel nodded his head, wary that that didn't need to be spoken. Hailey listened to the pacing wires try to shock life back into the fragile body, detected the people running about getting medication and switching the CPR task. But nothing was working for countless rounds. Will was now shaking like a hypothermic person, refusing to abandon Jay right at the end. With every round of shocks he'd jump a little less, beg for saving fading into the distance. He was about to accept things, picture a life of singularity when the got what they were looking for: normal rhythm.
"Get him downstairs, now!" In a blink the caravan of people and contraptions was gone. Paper, gauze, random things were seriously floating to the ground, doing their best to catch up with the speed of life.
"He's still alive. They're going to help him," Will repeated over and over again. Before long Hailey pulled away, patting Will's shoulder out of thanks as the two of them absorbed the emptiness of the place, appreciating both the good and bad behind it.
"So what exactly just happened?"
"Another clot. Based on how bad that just was, it got pretty close to the heart." Hailey nodded, slowly sliding against the glass wall, eventually ending in a lump of person. She figured that the last time she had quality sleep was two days ago at the very least. Two days that had been the biggest roller coaster of her life. It began with confronting Jay about his secret agenda, then cracking a case, only to worry about him all night before the terror of him missing kicked off the following morning. In forty-eight hours plus she hadn't eaten, showered, laid down, let alone brushed her hair or teeth. It was at this precise moment at 4:51AM that she fell asleep on the floor. No warning was dished out. There wasn't a farewell speech or request to be updated when Jay changed. She was there and then she wasn't, her body finally, mercifully letting her check out of reality for a time. Will was talking about what could possibly be happening in the imaging room just a couple floors down when he looked over the heap of Hailey, smirking before doing his best to rest her on the chair. She was tiny by any standard, but having to lift sound asleep body weight when you yourself are totally exhausted is a chore, but Will got the job done. Will found a blanket and gently placed it on top of her, taking a step back and watching the image of sound asleep, wishing he could join her in that world. His mind wasn't going to allow that. It was a habit of his, mentally walking through a procedure even when he wasn't present. He knew what was going on right now, how deep the catheter was in one of Jay's main arteries, how a device was being pushed into the vein to both retrieve the clot and place a filter that will prevent the deadly object to form once again.
It was in the shuttering over how close Jay was to teetering over the deadly edge that the wounded one returned. Just prior to the wave at the door, Will figured the ninth life was grabbed hold of a couple hours ago. The human body can only take so much. That once you reach a certain number of times it will just give up. No level of hope, prayer, and medication could lift someone from the fall to death. Going over the number of instances where Jay should've died, Will ultimately lost count. The act of retracing steps making him shiver with fear. He kept reminding himself that Jay should not be here, especially in one piece. If anything, Will was starting to talk himself into letting Jay go. The quality of life would certainly be much less then whatever ideas they had, or something Jay could live with. For his personal gain he was choosing to keep his brother suffering. So to say he jumped when his crazy, dark notion came to be absolutely nothing in an understatement. As the door was slid open Will held a finger to his lips, letting everyone know that Hailey was down for the count. Silence was upheld as they restated Jay, placing everything back to where it was prior to the latest round of setbacks. Will noted the new dressing just below the collarbone region, confirming his supposed procedure to be correct. Marcel waved for him to follow out of the room and Will obliged, heavily exhaling as the report rolled out.
"Found the clot in the artery opposite from the one we worked on. It was just about to enter the heart by the time we got it. It was huge, deadly if it had finished it's course."
"Damn."
"Yeah. We also put in a filter so that should be the end of this. He's going to be on the thinners for awhile. We're also going to keep him under the sedation for a little longer then we originally wanted. He hasn't really had a break so we need to keep trying to give him one." Will nodded, holding his arms out for a hug and Marcel eventually accept, a little weirded out by the whole thing.
"Thanks man. Seriously, he wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you guys."
"Of course." The men stepped away, staring in disbelief and amazement of the two sleeping people in that room. It wasn't ideal, or pretty and comforting, but it was happening.
"Have we reached the end?" There were so many layers to that, it was hard to figure out which one Will was referring to. Marcel began to walk away from his perch, cocked his head as his reply trailed off.
"We'll see." Will waited till he was alone in the hallway to venture back in. As he took his place in the scene he couldn't help but feel the music fade into the background. Its' sound was soft, draining, leaving you to wonder if it was the end of a masterpiece or the prelude to the main act.
…
He didn't die the following day, or the three days thereafter. In fact, he did the very opposite: live. By the end of day two he was lifted off the sedation, lungs finally doing the very thing they were intended for. Day three was when the first movements from the sleeping one slipped out. It would be a foot twitch here and a hand tightening there, but at last something was signaling there was life in that shell of a body. Day four was when the eyes fluttered. It was typically around the time pain meds needed to be reinserted so Will and Hailey used those times to talk to Jay, ask him basic questions or fill him in on what was going on between rounds. It was a gradual, sloth pace journey, but they were crawling in the right direction so no one was complaining. It would be days before he was allowed to leave this place, weeks before work was even brought up in conversations, but the fact that they were even discussing such things was everything. But it was the tail end of day five that it happened. That very thing that was a far away notion coming to fruition.
Hailey was reading a book about coping with the afterlife of all things, Will was straddling the doorway, hovering halfway in and out of the room; trying to talk to people about things while getting back in the room. Jay was about another hour away from the next round of pain meds, everything ticking along per the norm. Will was doing his best to take that next step into the room when he noticed a jolt, jump almost, from the person in the bed. It was as if Jay was dropped out from wherever the universe was holding him, giving him the green light to return to earth. He was passed out and then awake just like that.
"Hey hey, Hailey." She looked up from her book, darting first to Will who kept pointing to the thing in front of him. Jay was definitely awake and certainly in the process of freaking out. The arms and their fragile state slowly working up towards the face.
"Jay," she cautiously called out. Will forewent the conversation in the hallway, now at Jay's side and doing his best to pull the hands back down. Jay was swiveling his head left and right, blinking extra slowly and beginning to grunt in discomfort.
"Hey, don't move. You have to keep your arms at your sides." Predictably, Jay ignored Will the first time, now kicking feet in a slow yet scared manner. Hailey quickly picked up how out of it all Jay was, probably wouldn't be remembering this part of the journey.
"Jay," Will called again, the tone a little more serious this time. It seemed to do the trick since Jay went totally limp, relaxing as Will kept speaking.
"You're alright. Just let it breathe for you till Rhodes gets in here." Jay grunted a response that only Will understood. Hailey was holding back humorous snorts. The level of drugged up and out-of-it Jay was was so not like him and comical at this point. At this point the surgeon in question entered the room, sitting the bed up a little more as the brothers kept eye contact with each other. One of them wouldn't shut up while the other gazed around, stopping at odd things before moving along.
"Let's give this a try for a bit. He still might need to be intubated if the stats don't hold."
"Yeah, that's fine," Will replied. Jay glanced back over at his brother, still clueless on what all was going on.
"When I say blow, push this out as hard as you can. It's going to hurt but it'll help, alright?" A few seconds later Jay blinked in response, keeping his eyes closed as he felt the device be prepared to be yanked.
"1, 2, 3, go." It was a super weak effort on Jay's part, deep eye squints and gags showing his distaste for the whole thing, but before long he had a mouth, lips, entire face again. Hailey watched the tube land of Jay's chest before Rhodes picked it up and hand it off to someone. The very thing that was keeping the great one alive was now no more, it's role finally coming to a close.
"Jay, you've gotta open your mouth. It's like at the dentist." Jay nodded before opening his mouth just a small amount, his hand reaching for Will's arm as the suctioning removed the excess spit and blood from inside his mouth.
"What, does it hurt?" Jay nodded in response.
"Okay, okay, it's all done. We just have to put this under your nose and you're finished."
"Can you say hi," Rhodes asked? The noise that came out of Jay was so foreign, not at all what everyone was accustomed to. Some of this had to do with the fact he just woke up from a five day stint with unconsciousness, but the other thing was that they'd become used to him not really being there. While they all wanted him to survive, deep down they'd adjusted to life without him. A startling yet curious thing about the human race. Even in the depths of despair and moments where we don't think we can go on, we find a way. So to hear Jay speak, see him seeing everything and everyone, it was like they were breaking a law, cheating life's decision in a way. It was all so strange, but a good strange in this instance. Rhodes promised to return before long, congratulating Jay on the big accomplishment as he left. Hailey looked to Will who sighed a massive relief. He was about to speak when Jay motioned for him, the hand flopping in the direction of the torso. It was the best Jay could do considering. A whisper Hailey couldn't hear slipped out, Will smirking before leaning closer.
"I'm hungry," Jay spoke again, a little ticked that time. Will actually laughed that time, chuckling as he responded.
"Good! I'm sure we can find something here." Jay nodded, taking in his surroundings before dozing off. Hailey got up from her spot and headed for the door, stopping to ask Will something.
"What can he eat? I don't mind getting it."
"Oh, he's not ready to digest stuff just yet. I'll get him another nutrient pack for the feeding tube. It's all he can handle for right now," he replied in a whisper. The two of them stared at the miracle for a moment, fully breathing for the first time in forever. The stubborn ass would live to fight another day. Will moved first, jogging down the hall for the requested item. Hailey took a seat on the end of the bed, running her fingers against the leg closest to her, only to jump when Jay did. He'd become a light sleeper in record time, the sensation of someone touching him stirring him from a drug induced slumber. He looked around the room before finding her, giving her one of those looks that spoke a million things all at once.
"It's fine," she replied, smirking away some tears as he peacefully fell back sleep. While certainly things weren't fine at the moment, they would get there somehow, someway, someday, Hailey had no doubt about it.
You guys, I so wanted to tell you I was writing this. As I was putting this together very sweet people reached out to me. I hope you guys like this, even if it's a million words wrong. Also, I know that Rhodes left but I'm not ready to let him go. So for this instance he's in the story. Who is ready for January 8th?! I totally am. Just the small preview we got earlier this week was enough to send me spiraling. Our boy has to find a way out of this, and we better get some good whump along the way! I turn the directions over to you guys. Let's have some fun. Thank you so, so, so much for reading!