Months had passed, but had not brought any stillness or clarity to the reason of the return. To some, being back was as much of a burden as being trapped in hell. Ambivalence, confusion and turmoil were words not even closely sufficient to describe the emotions that haunted Sephiroth. He had been forged in the fire of brutal training and baptized in the blood of fallen soldiers, only to emerge through hell not as a changed man… but the same. The angel looked at his complexion mirroring back. Eyes so shallow and empty, the wintery gaze fell upon a troubled face, radiating with an indignant look. Sephiroth turned away from the mirror, images of his civilian self slowly fading inside his head. It was not an outfit he recognized, but he made an effort to appear in a way that was accepted by his surroundings. He felt nearly naked without his trusted Masamune; his loyal companion. The one that was now supposedly to be replaced by Vincent. Sephiroth frowned at the thought of that man. He felt such disdain towards his illicit moments with the former Turk that the mere thought sent a surge of acid into his mouth. From the days of his return to the passing of a season, his former self emerged and reclaimed an ever-increasing portion of Sephiroth to give way for the General. This was foremost noticeable in his way of relating to people, especially to Vincent. Discussions led most often nowhere as a stern Soldier wouldn't dignify being agitated by emotional approaches. Chaos and Vincent were left to themselves and Sephiroth began hiding in a cloak he had built out of upholding a perfect façade. When in Vincent's presence, Sephiroth remained standing and clearly demonstrating his unyielding character. His matted gaze was firm and cold, and whenever a subject of a more sensitive matter was brought up, Sephiroth would brush it off saying; "That's neither here nor there", "It's of no consequence", "It's of no importance" or "I think it's time to leave all that behind, don't you?" Contemplating, Sephiroth found himself out on streets. He was battling his thoughts in the hot afternoon sun in hope that the rays would disintegrate them once he managed to structure them in a comprehensive manner. The sudden interruption to his ruminant moment brought him out of the trance.
"It's not helping you to be like that, you know," came from behind, but there was no need to turn around to face the source of that moving, deep voice.
"I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about, Nanaki. And good afternoon to you too."
Nanaki bowed his head and greeted the silver Seraph. "I've noticed that you've changed quite a bit these past months. There are elements of something shattered inside of you, piercing through and causing you… grief."
"You are very perceptive, great Sentient."
"Am I?"
The question was rhetorical and Sephiroth knew very well that it were his own emotions that had heedlessly betrayed him. Somewhere in the fortress of the General there was a chink; a crack that weakened the construction and allowed for faint complaints to seep through. Curse the weakness alas nothing slipped past Nanaki, but for that, Sephiroth held the sentient in great regard.
"Perhaps you see things others can't notice."
"I'm not so sure, Sephiroth. I can hear Chaos rumble."
Sephiroth stopped and looked at the feline now walking next to him; "As can I, but we can't always have what we want."
Nanaki dismissed the comment with a head-on collision; "Not even if the world turned on its head and suddenly right was wrong or black became white, could anyone… ever… claim that either Vincent or Chaos got even the slightest of what they ever wanted… or desired."
"Do you suggest I should oblige their needs?"
Nanaki felt a wave of tension from Sephiroth, but didn't take notice.
"No. You are of course free to do as you wish in this matter, but my question is whether you are truly doing what you want or is it in spite?"
"In spite?" echoed from the platinum man. "I'm puzzled by how you perceive me, Nanaki, but I strongly urge you to reconsider any ideas about me having childish needs of vengeance to gain personal satisfaction of some petty sentiment. Are you on a mission, if I may ask?"
"Mission," Nanki snorted with scorn, but emanated of dignity. "Wouldn't that be as low on your scale as a petty sentiment?"
"Yes, it would."
"No, General. Both of us being warriors of the old days, you know there is no honor in being a messenger on behalf of someone's weakness. I'm not trying to convey a messge from another. We're just having a simple heart-to-heart."
"It's unnecessary. I have no need of it… not in the past and definitely not now. I can tell you, Nanaki, I have no interest in pursuing feebleness and I'm sure Vincent's aware that whatever happened in the darkness has no place in the light. This decision has congealded out of a mutual understanding. So why are you here, Nanaki?"
"Because I think you're off target and you are doing this in spite, which is wasting precious time and effort on your part."
Sephiroth's feline emeralds stabbed Nanaki in the core, but the shrewd sentient removed that thorn of ill with a subsequent query.
"Who has always punished you the hardest, Sephiroth? Who has been your whip and oppressor? Your greatest enemy?"
Sephiroth stopped in his path and watched the composed feline circle behind him and then rest on the warm ground. Nanaki had an inviting calmness ghosting over the face and the whiskers were twitching playfully each time the sentient caught scent of something drifting in the air. Sephiroth watched the tail burst into a pale flame whilst the answer was effortlessly extracted out of him.
"I," the General mumbled. "I've always been able to push myself harder than anyone else. No one could force me… as much as I was forcing myself."
"You've also been able to deny and castigate your soul like none other. And for what?"
"To achieve more."
"You've always achieved more."
"There is no room for weaknesses, Nanaki."
"So that's it then?" the feline stood up, facing the General. "You, my friend, are denying yourself Vincent and Chaos out of fear of feeling what you deem a weakness. Intimacy has no bearing on this. I've been there, Vincent's been there, everyone has been there… including you. All those rumors and speculation about the little 'slips' and 'falls' of the great General…"
"Were all rumors," Sephiroth persisted, but Nanaki latched on mercilessly, "But there is no smoke without fire, Seraph. There's always an element of truth in the lies, no? But there is more with Vincent. When you united behind this realm I could feel your scent on him for days, so it's not just… or only for intimacy that you deny him. What's wrong, Sephiroth?"
Sephiroth took a deep breath, gazing up at the sky whilst asking; "Why are we even having this discussion?"
"I just want to make sure you are basing your choices on the right reasons. I know that you are tormented by the thoughts on the past. Of all the others, you are the only one who has a very vivid memory of the nightmares you were trapped in. The others have fragments, something more akin to a dream… but you… you fear something. Why not let Vincent take you back to the past to the answers you seek? Are you afraid to face what you might find?"
"I can find my own answers, Nanki," Sephiroth injected bitterly.
"But we need your help to find ours, Seraph. You anchored on to Vincent and he pulled you out after years of nightmares. Why were you trapped there?"
"Because of my heritage."
"I don't think so," Nanaki opposed. "I acknowledge the power in your heritage and although you managed to isolate yourself once, before the trinity emerged…"
"Trinity?" Sephiroth cocked his head, but the great sentient went on without acknowledging the interruption, "…the final destruction of you would've weakened you enough to eventually be taken up to the Lifestream. But you held on and you chose to come back."
"It wasn't much of a choice if you had seen what was there, Nanaki," Sephiroth grunted.
"Indeed, but then why warn us? See, if I was so filled with resentment, why help the people who had put you into that situation?"
Sephiroth snorted; "I had to get out of there… the horror. I didn't care about the details. It wasn't by choice."
"Really?" Nanaki's tail swayed and flicked with a tiny flame. "Then why Vincent, when you could've chosen Cloud…"
"He sent me there."
"Tseng?"
"A pencil-pusher for ShinRa," Sephiroth retorted.
"Reno?"
"Insane."
"Barrett, Cid, Rude…"
"I've never had anything in common with those people and probably never will."
"Former Soldiers under your command then, or perhaps Tifa? She knew you from her young years."
"Yes, Tifa's a lovely girl, but I killed her parents along with her whole village, hence I doubt she'd appreciate my choice of timing of late night visits from me. All others I trusted are gone… dead."
"Ah, so you do admit you paid late night visits by choice."
Suddenly, Sephiroth realized he had walked into a carefully laid out trap where Nanaki had lured out the intentions behind the actions. The sentient circled him with steps as light as feathers, but a heart heavy with the burden he carried on behalf of his trusted friend Vincent.
"So, of all the people you could've chosen to be your guardian, you chose Vincent. And you were relentless. I think your union was your way of making sure he wouldn't abandon you. You nestled into his very core. And I don't think it's really because of affections… as I said, it has no bearing on it. Well, at least at first, what happened later as time passed may have been different. Nontheless, I think you summoned all your power to get out of there. You tried to warn us about something… something very important. What was that?"
"All right, Sentient. Let me clarify two things. First of all, I don't want to have anything to do with Vincent or Chaos because I feel nothing," Sephiroth snapped. "Secondly, whatever happened in the darkness is just a blur and it shall remain so. There're more important things in my past to build the future on, than what's sprung from nocturnal debaucheries or distorted realities. That part is over and done with and I wish to have no more discussions about it. Can I ask for that much respect? For people, including you, to leave my personal life out of the public arena?"
Nanaki bowed and expressed his gratitude for the brief discussion, regardless of the character it bore and bid Sephiroth farewell for the remainder of the day. He knew however, that the General was troubled by questions he was too proud to ask. It regarded his past and link to Vincent. But if he would not ask, then Nanaki had no business exposing the times of yore.
"Oh, and Nanaki," Sephiroth cast after him. "I have no friends."
Nanaki nodded understandingly to acknowledge Sephiroth's wish to remain detached from his surroundings and left the platinum man without saying another word. There was no more to gather from Sephiroth due to his reluctance to talk, and thus, Nanaki's path led him to a café where Tseng had agreed to meet with him over lunch. They sat down at a table outdoors and engaged in a conversation regarding the spawns. Nanaki had, as requested by Aeris, kept himself updated about the activities and wellbeing of the Jenova offsprings.
"So tell me, my friend," Nanaki began. "How's Yazoo coping?"
"He's growing increasingly restless. He can feel the presence of a force…"
"His brothers?"
Tseng nodded; "Yes, I'm guessing that's it. He wants to meet with them. Almost like an invisible attraction, some bond that ties them together. He seems to be feeling incomplete without them. He's growing belligerent. I think it's better if we bring them together soon. Isn't there anything you know… something new?"
"Not yet," Nanaki answered. "I don't think its time to meet yet, but there are troubling developments."
Tseng ordered a beer from a passing waiter and then resumed his discussion with Nanaki; "Like what?"
"I don't know. There's something in the air and it seems poisonous. All former allies are seemingly caught in a private war. Sephiroth with Vincent, Cloud and Kadaj, and Zack and Angeal are just wasting precious time… tearing them apart."
"Yazoo and I are fine, Nanaki."
"So far. Tell me Tseng, has Yazoo revealed anything of substance since his return."
Tseng shook his head. "Not really. But he sometimes wakes up from nightmares talking about bodies emerging from darkness. Funny, our nightmares stopped when they returned, but theirs have just gotten worse. I don't know, it's all too mystical for me."
"I wonder," Nanaki cast a glance at Tseng. "The last time I spoke to Aeris, she had warned me about the same things. Now that the brothers are back I wonder where we go from here. All she has told me is that they are not to reunite under any circumstances until we can get them to the Church of the Ancients."
"Where it all ended for her?" Tseng asked. "How peculiar."
"No," Nanaki opposed. "According to her it's where it all started for her. She has been most persistent in getting the spawns back into this plane and now that they are here, she insists on them being kept far apart. I've not quite understood her intentions. I tried to get answers out of Sephiroth because he's deepily troubled and unlike everyone else, who have embraced their responsibilities, he keeps on avoiding Vincent and won't give any answers."
"In time, Nanaki."
The great sentient tilted his head from side to side, clearly sceptical and concerned. He watched Tseng empty his glass and suggested he should order another as the discussions led into the workings of the corporation.
"Have you managed to find out anything more about the army… the clones?"
Tseng shook his head. "The research level is heavily guarded. There was a big change in the core facility of the research department about six-seven years ago. You see, Rufus returned from the Northern Caverns as a changed man, Nanaki."
The feline drew Tseng into his inquisitive gaze and asked the Turk to elaborate freely on his thoughts and take it from the start.
"I really can't say much, Nanaki, other than that I know we had retrieved something of great value to him from the caverns. Shortly after, he began a series of projects. He had the ShinRa facilities expanded. Prior to that the old research center was closed down and the former powerplant structures that reached below ground were taken into usage. He spent years bringing the old computers to life, had the systems purged and salvaged all the information possible. He even excavated whatever was left of the old ShinRa mansion and the documents of Nibelhiem were retrieved… and I tell you, there were so many new scientists flown in from the neighboring squadron."
"That definitely sounds like a grand project in the making."
"I don't know if it has any significance," Tseng went on, "but the restructurings included having his home rebuilt. I thought it was rather strange having high-technology surveillance installed and transforming his château into something of a fortress. He spends a lot of time there. I've not been to his new home, but I saw the record of the shipping as us Turks had to check through the transported material for any sabotage. It was high-caliber stuff, I tell you."
"Are you sure he was protecting something on the inside, rather than perhaps protecting himself against something from the outside?" Nanaki asked.
"I don't think it's from the outside," Tseng answered without a second of delay. "Rufus has nothing to fear with a new army. He has put a lot of money into it… still is. Tremendous amounts."
Nanaki nodded agreeing. "Yes. However, the army we saw was a completed project. There must be something else Rufus is up to. If this army was all, he wouldn't have to remain so secretive. We've already seen it. Abominations of all sorts have been created in those laboratories and I am sure these are no exceptions. However, I've seen worse than these. If money is still pouring in, then something more must be going on."
Tseng remained silent for a minute then began anew.
"Last week, the emperor of Magellanica paid a special visit to Rufus."
Nanaki cocked his head with surprise; "Magellanica?! The fourth member of the squadron?"
Tseng nodded. "Yes, odd isn't it? How often did we get inter-planetary visits like that during the era of the old president, eh? Anyway," the Turk buried his gaze in the empty glass he was holding. "The emperor stayed for three whole days and the lid was kept on it all through the whole time. No ceremonial reception, nothing. Even his food was ordered up to the Palace Hotel and he was not seen on the streets up until his departure. The only time I saw him was when he arrived, as we escorted Rufus to meet the man at the arrival platform, and when he left."
The sentient's tail burst into a flickering flame as he submerged in thought. What could the purpose of such a secretive visit be?
"All I can say, Nanaki, is that the emperor came empty-handed, but left with a massive convoy of airships."
"Ships? What ships? What was in those ships, Tseng? Workers?"
The Turk shook his head and cast a piercing glance at the great feline saying; "I doubt it. That programe has not started yet. These were military units."
Nanaki raised his head towards the sky and spoke with a sigh; "Take contact with Cid, my friend. Maybe he can dig up some information on what was shipped out. Someone must know something. Someone must know what Rufus is up to."