I really destroyed this thing. Chandra marvelled at the chaotic destruction she brought down on her physics textbook. I don't have money for a new one and I'd really rather not explain why I need a replacement. As she slid the mangled book into her bag, the magnitude of what would be an underwhelming day for everyone around her was causing her mind to fog over with nerves.
"You're okay," she muttered to herself through long, deep breaths. "You're going to go school, be there for a few hours, then come home like you have hundreds of times before. It's a test today. You don't even need to talk to her. The reassurances weren't making Chandra feel any calmer, but she wasn't getting any worse; that was crucial.
One last look in the mirror showed someone looking neither good nor bad – red shirt, black hoodie, black pants. Non descript and nearly invisible was exactly what she was going for.
When Chandra emerged from her room, the first thing she noticed was her mother's eyes, fixated on her as if she had been watching the door all morning to see if her daughter would come through it. Pia was glowing and Chandra knew this meant she had noticed the backpack in her hand. "Are you going to class," she squeaked, doing a lacklustre job containing her excitement.
"Yeah. Can I get a ride?" Chandra accompanied her short response with as genuine a smile as she could make to try and convince her mother that everything was okay.
"Fantastic! Go tell your sister we're ready." She was worried that if she left the room, there would be confetti everywhere when she returned, but obliged anyway. Chandra knocked on Liliana's door and once invited in, started to instruct the other girl, "hey, my mother told me to..." She cut herself off when she saw her sister looking at the window, lost with admiration.
"My house was so old," she said whimsically, "when it rained, you could hear it as if you were standing outside. Poor insulation." Chandra had been so focused on getting one foot in front of the other that she hadn't even noticed it was raining – more specifically, pouring. Just what I need. "But here," Liliana continued, "everything is so quiet... A bit of a shame."
This was the first time Chandra heard Liliana lament her new life and right now, she didn't care. "Yeah, anyway. My mother said she's ready to go."
Finally pulling herself away from the view, Liliana also took note of Chandra with joy – though it wasn't giddy like her mother's. There was a hint of satisfaction as if she had won the pool. "Of course. Let me just grab a rain coat." As she was rummaging through her closet, the intensity of the weather crescendoed swiftly and violently and Liliana lit up. "Hail. How exciting."
Chandra could tell her sister had spoken, but for some reason, it sounded muffled as if her ears were plugged. Despite that, the hellish outside seemed to be getting louder than weather had any right to be and the anxiety that was a steady murmur shot up more dramatically than the rain had. Failing at controlling herself, Chandra was reaching hyperventilation.
"Hey, Chandra, are you okay?"
Liliana's voice was still distorted, but the hail was no longer the only sound pounding at Chandra's senses. It was a distant, deep and steady roar. It was frightening and familiar. "Do you hear that noise?" Chandra asked desperately.
"Yes...The hail. I just said -"
"The other noise," Chandra hissed with panic in her voice as she felt a rumbling at her feet and the reality sank in. "Oh god." She could hear the whimper in her own voice. "They're here. They're not supposed to be here." Were it not for the training drilled in to her, she would be shrieking.
As overwhelmed with terror as Chandra was, she couldn't help noticing things were slightly off. There was no doubt in her mind that she was standing in her bedroom, but she couldn't remember how she got there. Stranger still, there was someone in the room she recognized but couldn't place. I know her...I know she's not with them. I need to keep her safe.
The woman standing in front of her didn't seem to understand the need for silence. Chandra couldn't hear the words she spoke, but it was noise and noise got you killed. Grabbing the stranger with desperate force, Chandra threw both of them into the nearby closet and gently closed it.
Why is she still talking!? Chandra slammed her open palm against her closet mates mouth – harder than she meant to, but that didn't matter. If it takes a couple broken teeth to get the message to her. It didn't take long before she stopped mumbling into Chandra's sweaty palm.
With that immediate problem out of the way, the cowering girl was able to focus on the bigger picture as it loomed closer. Mobile Garrisons. Sounds like more than one. Just remember, if you cry, we die. If you cry, we die. Chandra repeated this mantra to herself to try and drown out the noise. It wasn't working.
So far, she had managed to keep her tears silent but each breath seemed as loud as a scream and Chandra couldn't contain it. The issue suddenly got more hopeless when a screech implied one of the massive garrisons had stopped. That meant soldiers. To keep herself grounded in the present, she quietly fumbled through her pockets to confirm the brownie stuffed with a thumbdrive was there. When she checked and rechecked everywhere and found nothing, panic ran through her body.
Maybe it's still under the floorboards, but I probably left it on my fucking desk, like an idiot. Stupid, stupid, STUPID. I can't do anything right. Chandra could hear the thundering pitter patter of soldiers and while she knew if her delivery was in plain sight, there was enough time to grab it and get back into hiding, her trembling hands couldn't bring themselves to open the closet.
The woman sitting in front of her reached out and firmly wrapped her hand around some of Chandra's quivering fingers. She was too ashamed of her cowardice to dare look the stranger in the eye and knowing no one else was in the house yet, she buried her face and shamelessly muttered, "I don't wanna die," over and over as if saying it enough times would grant her a wish.
True hopelessness crawled through her whole body when she heard a voice – a man's voice. I'm gonna die. Everyone is going to die. Why didn't father just run away and let Baral kill me instead? Tears and snot were running down her face. She was managing to keep it quiet, but it didn't matter. Chandra knew a closed closet door wasn't going to trick a consulate soldier. He'd know what to do; he'd be brave. I want to be brave too, but I'm not. I'm useless.
Purposeful steps were getting closer and Chandra clawed at herself randomly as if she were a dog too overwhelmed with emotion to know what to do with her own body. They're going to find us. If I come out of here to surrender, they probably won't find whoever this is too. They'd only take me. Take me and...
The mystery woman seemed to be trying to comfort her with soothing strokes, but stopped abruptly when a voice opened the bedroom door. Chandra was unable to make out the words, but the source was clear.
Mother! A hint of calm rushed through Chandra, but there was still the sound of dozens of barking soldiers and screaming villagers, so she opened the door only a crack so she could hiss, "mother! You have to hide."
Pia knelt down in front of the closet and quickly swung it open. "What on earth are you two doing?"
The other woman said nothing, but Chandra, through gritted teeth, insisted, "they'll be here soon. They're going to find us and kill us."
For some reason, her mother was indifferent. Some confusion was showing, but it dissipated when, with the utmost softness, she said, "the hail. Of course." As Chandra screeched to herself, why isn't she listening to me, Pia called, in a stern and calm voice, "Jovi, can you come here?"
Quickly, someone else entered the room. That must have been the man I heard. Much like the woman sitting with her, Chandra failed to come up with a reason for why she recognized him. Her mother abruptly turned to address him before anyone else could assess the situation, "I need you to go to Chandra's room and bring me any photos you can find."
The man obeyed without hesitation as most people did when Pia spoke to them. But we're in my room.
"Chandra," her mother said softly, "can you hear me?"
What is wrong with her!? "Of course I can. Why are you just sitting there?"
"I know what you're seeing right now seems real." It didn't seem possible, but Pia's voice softened further - to the intensity of a lullaby. "But it's not. You're having a flashback."
Pia's deceleration felt like a drill breaking apart Chandra's already splintering mind. She knew what the words were and most of her focus was on figuring out what they meant, but when she couldn't make sense of it, she returned to more pressing matters. "You're not making any sense." In contrast to her mother's voice, Chandra's was getting faster and harsher. "They're going to be here soon. Why are you just sitting there!?" It took all of Chandra's willpower and fear to not scream in desperation.
"No one is coming." The kind smile and slow, soothing tone stayed with her mother and Chandra was starting to get angry at the nonchalant behaviour. "You're safe. You're in your home on Dominaria. What you're seeing and hearing is a hallucination."
Pieces of the puzzle were starting to come together. Hallucinations? I've had those before. Do I live on Dom...No! Chandra tried to smack the confusing thoughts out of her head. "You don't know what you're saying. I can hear them, I can feel the ground shaking. Why are you pretending this isn't happening?"
The figure reentered the room and loomed above Pia; Chandra cowered when she saw the man reaching down – staying recoiled even after realizing he had only handed something to her mother. It was a stack of something that Pia was sorting through, finally presenting a photograph from the pile. "Look at this picture and tell me what you see."
The answer came to her as immediately as it should. That's me with Jace, Gideon and Nissa from graduation but that image made no sense to Chandra's mind that was struggling to make sense of anything. When she found herself unable to put it into words it only frustrated her further. "Stop confusing me!" The last bit of restraint was leaving her.
"That's a picture of you." Pia described it in detail and hearing the words outloud brought the realization to Chandra that something didn't make sense. She was sure of the sounds around her and knew she was in her bedroom on Kaladesh, but she also knew that was impossible if she was looking at a photo of herself in high school. The two truths clashing were causing an overwhelming pain in her head and she found it harder to focus on the next picture her mother showed her.
That's me. As she tried her best to squint through the pain and watery eyes. It took a moment but she was able to absorb more details. "That's me with Nissa," she unknowingly spoke.
"Good." Pia seemed proud of the answer. "Where are you two?".
The visual of the two grown women standing by the statue of Karn at Tolaria West felt like it made a bit of sense. "We're at school...That was our first day."
"Exactly. If the war on Kaladesh was still happening, you wouldn't have been at Tolaria." Pia shifted slightly out of the closet doorway, bringing light inside. "Now look at the room you're in. Is that the bed you slept in as a child?" It's in the wrong spot. Chandra slowly shook her head. "Did you have a bookshelf that large?"
No. She shook her head again – more enthusiastically this time.
"Look who's sitting across from you." Pia directed her daughter toward Liliana.
"Liliana..." Her sister gave her a loving and relieved grin.
"You didn't know her during the war."
With that, the room around her changed as suddenly as if she turned to a different TV station. She was in her sister's closet with Liliana; her mother's wrinkled eyes looked into hers with her step father standing over them. The only sound that remained was the hail. "I'm at home...The war is long over."
Liliana seemed to take this as an all clear and slowly shuffled out of the closet, standing above Pia next to her father. What had actually just transpired began sinking in for Chandra and once she was done processing, a lump formed in her throat and she tried her best to stifle an outburst. It seemed like it was going to work until she saw the expression on Liliana's face – some combination of terror and despair, and even worse, blood on her lip from Chandra's blow.
The words were a struggle to get out in one piece but as her vision became increasingly blurry and her chin quivered with anticipation, she managed to whimper out an, "I'm sorry," before leaping into her mother's chest and weeping so powerfully that she didn't hear the Vess' leave the room.