Captain Hiccup Of Asgard

by geofracul

This story happens when hiccup is sent to show the big burglars that dragons are good and positive however the gods have better ideas. (this is not my story however I continued it with is promition)

24. to pass a test

chapter 24: to pass a test

High Asgard, Day 14 since Hiccup's Departure

Footsteps. Footsteps of soldiers. Five Aesir warriors, helmets bright and spears gleaming, were marching down the hall with the superiority and power of Gods. Smoothly and with matching strides did they march, and the fall of their footsteps were that of one entity. In the center of these warriors was Hiccup. He was walking firmly and confidently, flanked by two soldiers on each side and the fifth led in front. Their destination was the Asgardian Council.

Hiccup's sleek black elvish armor was of a make and style that far surpassed his fierce escort, and even when being conducted by five of the most fearsome soldiers in the land, he looked the most dangerous of the group. Clusters of Aesir men and women stopped in their movements through the halls to make way and stare at the awe-inspiring spectacle.

Turning a corner, Hiccup looked up and saw that the hallway ended, and there was a white door that looked even more important and mysterious than any of the things he had seen on Asgard. Three men, dressed in golden armor, stood in front of the white passage. As they approached the door, the lead soldier in Hiccup's escort barked a command. The Aesir soldiers all stopped, and then stepped aside to give the three men passage to Hiccup. Even though they were all helmeted, Hiccup recognized one of them, for he had just seen him several hours ago.

It was Heimdall.

"Welcome, Riddari Hiccup," the large Captain of the guard announced, his face utterly emotionless. "You are about to enter the Asgardian Council."

"So I've been told," Hiccup yawned, speaking for the first time since Asgeirr had found him in the halls. "I was summoned to the Council over half an hour ago. What took so long? Oh, and I hope the Council has refreshments in there, I'm hungry."

Heimdall didn't even blink. "I've been told of your disrespect and sarcastic disposition," he commented. "You give enough of your quibble to my guards. I respect that and even admire it, but trust me, your attitude will get you nowhere in this Council. The Gods you are about to meet are more powerful than you can ever dream of becoming."

Hiccup sighed. "If you must give me a pep talk, get on with it," he groaned. "Asgeirr gives me enough harsh words about my brashness towards the Gods, even," Hiccup grinned, "the most powerful in the Nine Realms."

Heimdall's eyes flickered angrily, and he did not reply. Instead he turned to his two golden-clad companions, and they stepped forward and laid hands on Hiccup.

It was a pat-down. Hiccup obligingly held his arms out and spread his legs to let them feel all over his body, which they did without blinking. The two men were utterly thorough, and even removed some of his armor and replaced it to search some areas. It was a fast and efficient job, with no waste movement or intent to offend.

Hiccup was very surprised that they did not touch Hicca, but was glad they didn't – if they did, he would have resisted. When the search was finished, the two men stepped back. Heimdall gazed steadily at Hiccup, then took one step forward and reached for Hicca, as if he was going to take the sword off his back.

Hiccup struck. Bouncing off the ground, he kicked Heimdall in the chest with both feet, using him to do a spinning kick and knock the other two Aesir men aside. It was a move he had learned from Vulcan. Hiccup landed adroitly on his toes and fingertips as all three guards fell, and drew Hicca with a ring. As soon as he removed his sword, the Aesir soldiers that surrounded him dropped their spears and drew their own blades, poised for action.

The three guards, all knocked to the ground, began to rise, and Hiccup snarled at them, even as the rattle of spears still sounded on the marble floor.

"This is MY sword," Hiccup told the guards. "And she stays with me. I don't care if I'm going to see all the Gods on the nine realms, I take Hicca with me and I never give her up."

Heimdall had regained his feet, and this time he was smiling.

"I know," he told Hiccup. "You and your sword go together and are not separated, and I have orders to let it pass through. I wasn't going to touch it – I just wanted to see how you would react." Heimdall's smile grew wider. "Perhaps Midgard has some hope after all."

Hiccup straightened up and sheathed his sword, returning the big man's grin. As if to mirror Hiccup, the Aesir soldiers sheathed their weapons and resumed a calm stance, but they did not take their gaze away from Hiccup to pick up their spears.

"You are cleared to go inside," Heimdall told Hiccup, his smile fading and his face becoming as emotionless as before. "But since you are armed, you need an escort, which these soldiers are. I am just informing you. That is non-negotiable."

Hiccup shrugged. "I've no objection."

"Good." Heimdall turned and left, his two companions following. Despite the fact that they had all been kicked, they acted as if nothing had ever touched them. The Aesir soldier that had led the escort turned to Hiccup.

"Well, Riddari, you were just complaining about how long this was taking, and now we're waiting on you. Go on in."

"Finally," Hiccup grinned, rolling his shoulders. "Time to go see what the Gods are made of." With that, he walked up to the white carven doors, and pushed them open.

Hiccup's eyes immediately took in the entire room. It was shaped in the form of a large rectangle, with long benches along the rear, at his back. Along either side were rows of golden-clad guards. On a chair off to one side but in an easily visible location was Asgeirr, which surprised Hiccup. He had no idea why his Master would be present. Hiccup turned around fully so he could see what was behind him, and was again surprised to see an entire gallery of Aesir men and women in a balcony behind him. Turning back around, he looked front. Directly ahead of him, all seated behind a giant raised table made of pure gold and rubies, were seven of the most powerful beings he had ever laid eyes on.

This council was what determined the course of everything. The Gods monitored, owned, and controlled all the worlds, including Midgard. Hiccup was walking in to meet with the ones who played with his homeland like a toy.

Hiccup recognized only a few of the seven Gods. In the center of the long table sat Odin, whom he had seen before, and sitting on his left side, slightly behind, was Thor. Hiccup assumed he wasn't actually a Council member – he was just there to observe. On Odin's right was a large, attractive woman whom Hiccup assumed was Frigga. Just seeing the legendary husband and wife made him want to tremble, but he resisted. He had no idea who the other Gods were, but they were all bearded except for a bald, shaved giant on one end, who wore armor rather than regal garments. Hiccup had no idea how to begin to speak to them.

Frigga solved the problem for him. She spoke.

"Riddari Hiccup of Midgard, you are now in the presence of the Asgardian Council. You stand before the AllFather Odin, the God Thor, Frigga, Kvasir, God of Wisdom, Forseti, God of Justice, Vor, the Goddess of reason, and Tyr, the God of war."

Hiccup surveyed the table of Gods coolly. When he first arrived on Asgard he would have fallen on his face in terror, but now he had formed different opinions of the Gods. The four he had not seen before were Kvasir, the black haired and black eyed God of Wisdom, Forseti, the God of Justice, who had a flowing white beard, Vor, the Goddess of reason, who was beautiful, charming, and soft, and Tyr, who was the bald giant clad in armor. He was the God of war.

"Bow to the Gods," Frigga commanded.

Hiccup stopped scanning the table and locked eyes with Frigga.

"No," he said.

Frigga stared at him, and the Gods all stared in stunned shock.

"You refuse to bow to us?" Frigga demanded, her tone more surprised than angry.

Hiccup shrugged. "I bow to people I respect. I don't know many of you, and there is only one I'll bow to. Thor, I bow to you." Hiccup inclined his head. "As for the rest of you, may I daresay you don't need me bowing to help puff up your bellyfuls of importance." Hiccup gazed at Odin.

The Gods stared, and the people sitting behind him in the gallery all seemed to shift in awe, whispering to each other in tones of fear.

"I swear," Odin said, his voice hoarse, "That you are the most belligerent, audacious, and foolish being I have ever laid eyes on."

Hiccup grinned. "I'm a Viking. I have stubbornness issues. But come, AllFather, what is a mere bow? It's a lot better if I'm honest with you. My opinion of you all is very low at the moment, and bending my neck a few inches won't change that."

The Goddess Vor, seated in her chair on the far left of the table, smiled but said nothing. Instead, the black haired God Kvasir spoke up. He was the God of Wisdom, and Hiccup was interested as to what a wise man would say to his words.

"I agree with you, Riddari Hiccup," Kvasir said, his voice calm and unhurried. "Formalities are mere nonsense."

Hiccup allowed himself a slight smile, and Kvasir went on.

"You have been summoned here for a purpose, Riddari Hiccup. It has been called to our attention that you fought Freyja, almost killed her, and stole the Sword of Death from her. This leads us to -"

"I didn't steal the sword." Hiccup interrupted. "She attacked me. I was defending myself when I took that sword."

"But you hid it!" Odin leaned forward. "Riddari Hiccup, that sword is incredibly powerful, you know that. You may have been justified in disarming Freyja, but you didn't stop there. Oh no. You deliberately concealed the weapon from us, because you knew we would demand it of you!"

"I did."

"Why?" Kvasir stroked his short black beard, looking every bit as wise as he was renowned to be. "Surely, Hiccup, you do not intend to use the Sword of Death? You do not even know how. You didn't hide it for your own benefit, you hid it so we wouldn't get it."

Hiccup smiled. "I see you have earned your title as the God of Wisdom, Kvasir. Yes, I hid the Sword of Death so that you couldn't get your hands on it."

"Why?" Kvasir asked.

"Because it is mine. I earned it, not you. I was the one who took it from Freyja."

"And that was a VERY unwise thing to do," Kvasir sighed. "Riddari Hiccup, we have been trying for many years to convince Freyja to allow dragons into Valhalla. She is proud and full of hate, but we were making progress. Now, however, all of our work has been washed away. You foolishly told her of her dragon sons, and to make matters worse, you took her sword, the pride and majesty of Valhalla. In short, you embarrassed and humiliated her."

"Which brings us to the point," the God Forseti stated, speaking for the first time. "With the Sword of Death in our possession, we can force Freyja to let dragons go to Valhalla when they die, which is what they truly deserve. It is just, and as the God of Justice, I always pursue that."

Hiccup nodded. "I respect that, Forseti."

"If you give us the Sword of Death," Kvasir went on, "it is quite likely that we can use it to make a deal with Freyja."

Hiccup smiled. "Do you like deals, Kvasir?"

A corner of Kvasir's mouth went up. "When it is the wisest choice, a deal is one of the most valuable things one can have."

"Very well." Hiccup stepped forward. "Then I have a deal for you. All I wanted out of this whole mess with Freyja was one thing, one simple little thing!" He turned and spoke to the gallery of citizens. "I wanted to send a message back to Midgard, my home! That was why I told Freyja of her children. My tribe thinks I am dead, and I can't have that. War has most likely already begun. I must let my family and my friends know that I'm alive." He turned back to the Gods. "So here is my proposal. Let me write a message, drafted as I see fit, and send it to my father back on Midgard. Then I will return the Sword of Death to you." Hiccup flipped a hand. "Simple. Easy. We can resolve this in seconds and we all will benefit."

"No." Odin was staring down at Hiccup, a look of contempt on his face.

"No?" It was Forseti, the God of Justice, speaking for only the second. He stroked his long white beard as he turned to address Odin. "Why not? AllFather, Hiccup's offer is just."

"He is offering to return something he stole!" Odin roared. "That is not justice!"

"Hiccup had every right to take that sword," Forseti argued. "Your own son, Thor, witnessed that Freyja attacked Hiccup first. If a man tried to stab you and you took his dagger, that is not theft. That is defense. Hiccup was protecting himself. His offer is just. AllFather, we should consider accepting."

"No."

All eyes went to the one who had spoken. Asgeirr, who had been sitting in a plain wooden chair to the side, rose to his feet.

"With permission, Good Council, I would like to speak." He said firmly.

Odin nodded, gesturing with one hand. "Speak, Warlock."

"Good Council," Asgeirr rumbled, stepping forward, "I understand the importance of the Sword of Death, but my job is not to worry about such matters. I am only in charge of one thing, Hiccup and his training. With the success of my venture in mind, we CANNOT make this deal with him. It is essential that during this preparation, Hiccup learns that NO ONE will help him, NO ONE will make his life easier. He needs to learn what hardship and pain is. We made that mistake with Zyon."

The Asgardian Council shifted uncomfortably, and the gallery of people began to whisper.

"I understand your concern." Asgeirr was grim. "Zyon was, mildly speaking, a failure, and the reason why was because we gave him too long of a leash. He became arrogant and thought himself worthy to fight against the Gods themselves. As a result five Gods died. This cannot and will not happen again. Right now Hiccup is learning that fighting against the Gods is acceptable! He just defeated Freyja, and now he wants to bully us into giving him what he wants. He won't even bow to you. Good Council, we must keep Riddari Hiccup in check. He needs to learn that he cannot take the Gods so lightly. He needs to know that he is nothing, and stays nothing." Asgeirr turned to Hiccup, a grin on his face. "He does not deserve any favors."

Hiccup glared. "Damn you, Master."

Tyr, the God of War, on the far right of the table, then cleared his throat. His chair creaked as he lifted his enormous body from it. Muscles layered his form so thickly that they looked about to tear through his armor. He spoke for the first time, and his voice was terrifying and fierce.

"You have heard Lord Asgeirr," he rumbled. "AllFather, you must understand. My father was beheaded by Zyon when he turned traitor. While he was unsuspecting and unarmed, Zyon cut his head from his shoulders. I will not allow such a disgrace and tragedy to occur again. Good Council, we have entrusted Asgeirr with this - this boy, and what the Warlock says makes sense, even to the mind of simple soldier like myself. We should listen to the Warlock. I agree with him. In the interest of war, which I represent, it would be preferable to NOT oblige Riddari Hiccup. I would much rather be fighting beside a trained rider than against one."

"You speak for the interest of war," Forseti commented, as Tyr sat down. "I speak for justice. If justice is to be done in this matter, we should send a message for Hiccup. We have abused him in body and mind, and now we are refusing one little trifle. It would be just to grant his request."

"But it is not wise." Kvasir frowned, his black eyebrows furrowing. "A message is very hard to send, but compared to regaining the Sword of Death it is trivial. However, that is not the point. We cannot send a message. Firstly, if Hel, our greatest enemy, catches wind of it, she will know we have you and may take steps to hurry her assault on Midgard. Secondly, for the reasons Lord Asgeirr described, it is inherently dangerous. Wisdom leads me to decide that no message should be sent."

"I agree." The voice was so sweet and calm in the midst of so many fierce and savage opinions that Hiccup was stunned. He turned to look at the speaker, the Goddess Vor. She was the smallest God in the room, and her beautiful black hair was draped in a long braid over her right shoulder. She was stunningly radiant, and a circlet of silver encased her head. But most enchanting was her smile, which was sincere and comforting.

"Riddari Hiccup," she said sweetly, "I fully understand your desire to inform your people so you can prevent war on Midgard. But there is something you misunderstand, Hiccup. There is so much more to Midgard than just a few Viking tribes and dragons. There are more humans on your home world than you even dreamed of, and war is ever present. A trifling conflict in your homeland is not worth sending a message for. If we were to try and stop every little battle that occurred, we would be overrun. Reason tells me that we should not give you what you desire, as much as I would like to. I am sorry."

Her soft, sweet voice had soothed Hiccup, but by the time she was finished Hiccup was as sour as before.

"Well, all right, then," he growled. "You won't give me my message, you won't get the sword."

"OF ALL THE AUDACITY!" Odin roared, springing to his feet. "I've heard enough! Lord Asgeirr, take this dog out of my hall, and reschedule his final test for NOW! Make the question 'Where is the sword of death?!'"

Guards sprang forward to seize Hiccup, but suddenly Tyr, the God of war, barked a command.

"Wait!"

The soldiers stopped, and Hiccup glanced at them warily before looking back up to the Gods.

"I have one more thing to discuss with you," Tyr told him. "Forget what we just debated here, this is an entirely different subject. Earlier, Asgeirr informed me that you created a device – an explosive device."

Hiccup nodded, a slight frown creasing his forehead. "I did."

"How?!" Tyr leaned forward. "Spellcasters and magicians have been trying to make something that does that for centuries! It's unbelievable. You made it in less than an hour. I know what the ingredients you used are, but ten different groups of dwarvish builders have been working with the same materials ever since you did it, and none of them have come close! I need to know what you did to make it."

"I don't think you understand the full weight of what you've done," Vor added. "It's incredible and also unnerving. The power and deadliness of your creation could be a turning point in wars. We need to know how to make it."

Hiccup grinned, then laughed bitterly. "You sure picked the wrong time to ask me for a favor," he said. "Right now I'm not exactly in an obligatory mood."

"Come now!" Tyr snorted. "Don't be a fool. Just because we rejected you once means nothing. We're both soldiers, ignore the politics. This is a new discussion. How did you make that bomb?"

Hiccup sighed. "Very well. So, I first got the idea to make this bomb a long time ago, when my friend Fishlegs back home brought up an interesting thought. He proposed that things can come in several different forms. Take water, for example. Where I come from, there is lots of ice. You can take a chunk of ice, bring it indoors, put it in a bowl, and it becomes water soon. So the ice is water. Now you pour that water into a pan over a fireplace. The water vanishes, and it becomes steam. If you touch that steam, your hand gets damp, so it's still water. So water can be three things, solid, liquid, and gas."

Hiccup paused. "So if water can do this, why can't other things? I was a smith, and I know metal can be both solid and liquid. So I looked at Zippleback gas. Why can't that become a liquid and a solid also?"

Hiccup shrugged. "I never tried it until Asgeirr told me to make something. I had thought about doing it, and with the supplies I had, was able to convert the gas to a liquid, and poured that explosive liquid into a hollowed ball. It worked out great."

"How, though?" Tyr demanded. "That is the part that has our magicians baffled. How did you change the gas to liquid? We know you used Night Fury saliva, but how?"

Hiccup grinned. "That is for me to know. Not you."

"Oh, for Hel's sake!" Tyr exploded. "What do you WANT!?"

"I want a message sent back to Midgard for me!" Hiccup shouted.

"It's useless!" Odin roared. "Take him out!"

"One more thing!" Forseti called. "All right, Hiccup, just one last question. "Could you make a bomb large enough to destroy a city?"

Hiccup laughed. "With about a thousand Zipplebacks, a ball the size of a house, and some hundred gallons of Night Fury saliva -"

"COULD IT BE DONE!?" Tyr roared.

Hiccup met his gaze evenly. "Yes," he said. "If I had enough supplies, I could blow Asgard into nothing."

The whole room was silent.

"Very well," Tyr said, awe in his tone. He turned to Odin. "AllFather. You heard him. He has two things we want now. I understand that giving him what he wants may work against us, but the benefits here may outweigh the liabilities."

There was a long silence, and all the Gods turned to look at Odin. The old God stared at Hiccup, stroking his white beard thoughtfully. Frigga, his wife, looked at him supportively. Odin looked down at his hands, and then back up.

"No," he said with finality. "We will not bargain with you, Riddari Hiccup."

Hiccup's face contorted, and became black with rage.

"You can't be serious," he growled. "Stop pretending and trying to use this dumb logic and reasoning on me! There's one reason you won't do this for me, and you know it! You're all scared of me! You are afraid that I will beat you, and you won't stand for letting me get what I want! You're little chickens! You aren't real Gods! You're worthless cowards!"

By this point every person in the room was on their feet, the spectators, the guards, and even the Gods themselves. Two of the soldiers sprang forward to take hold of Hiccup's arms.

"Hi!" Hiccup yelled. "Let go of me! You slime! Why -"

The two soldiers slugged Hiccup in the gut, and he slumped in their hold, gasping for breath. He struggled, but another Aesir soldier came up behind him and grabbed his neck in a headlock. Hiccup could not resist, and was suppressed.

Then the five of them dragged Hiccup out.

As the door banged behind the entourage, the entire room all sat quietly for a minute, and then Asgeirr rose and addressed the Gods.

"I'll come and speak to you again soon. However, I have to go test him now. I will do as you requested, AllFather, and switch the test question to 'Where is the Sword of Death.'" Asgeirr nodded. "We'll see what he's really made of. Excuse me."

Asgeirr bowed graciously and turned to walk towards the door that Hiccup had just been dragged out of.

"What are your expectations for the Riddari, Lord Asgeirr?" Tyr called after him.

Asgeirr stopped at the door and turned. He smiled.

"He'll pass," he stated. Then, with another bow, he left.

There was an eerie silence in the Council room. Then Odin rose to his feet and addressed the gallery of Aesir citizens, who had been watching the entire performance in stunned awe.

"Out. All of you. Give us the room."

The people immediately obeyed, and everyone filed out, escorted by the soldiers. It took a few minutes, and while the people left, Odin sat down and sipped his wine tentatively, looking up at his son Thor, who was standing by Odin's side.

"Thor."

"Yes, Father?" Thor asked.

"Answer this question completely honestly. If I asked you to defeat Hiccup in a fight, could you do it?"

"I -" Thor hesitated. "I really don't know, Father."

Odin nodded. "I see." He sipped his wine again.

An Aesir guard approached, bowed, and stated, "The room is clear, my Lord."

"Very good," Odin answered. "Dismissed."

With another bow, the soldier turned and left, his fellow guards following him. The door clicked silently, and the Gods were left alone in the giant hall. Even all the Aesir Gods were gone.

Odin turned and glared up at Thor. "All right, son. Why in the name of Loki did you let Hiccup leave you with that sword in his possession?"

Thor made a wry face. "I'm sorry, Father. Truth be told, I did not want to have any further part in what happened up there in Valhalla. I was asked to escort him there, and not to battle Freyja and help in the removal of the Sword of Death. I'm afraid of Freyja as it is."

Odin snorted. "You are talented in battle, Thor, but you lack the brains of a half-witted babe."

Thor nodded. "I know."

Odin sighed, and sipped some wine again. "I'm afraid the quest to recover the Sword of Death is fairly useless at the moment. Freyja will think we're lying when we tell her that we don't have it, but we can't help that. We've already searched everywhere we know Hiccup has been since the incident, but unfortunately he was alone and unsupervised for a large segment of time. There is not much we can do about this. Maybe he'll break in the test, but I doubt it. So does Asgeirr, and he should know."

Odin paused. "So, Frigga, Kvasir, Forseti, Tyr, Vor, what do you think of our next wonderful Captain of Asgard?" The old God rarely used sarcasm, but he couldn't help himself in this instance.

"I like him," Forseti admitted. "I know he's very disrespectful, but the fact that he no longer fears us is good. If he doesn't fear ourselves or Freyja, that means he won't fear Hel."

Odin said nothing.

"He unnerves me," Frigga said quietly. Odin's wife shook her head sadly. "His eyes!"

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIS EYES!?" Odin roared, leaping to his feet and dropping his goblet of wine on the table. It splashed, and wine spilled over the white tablecloth.

"Oh, come now, AllFather!" Kvasir exploded. "We've all been thinking the same thing since that blasted boy walked in here. Good Council, let's face it about Hiccup. HIS EYES LOOK LIKE LOKI'S."

There was a dead silence, with the only noise being the drip of Odin's wine as it dripped steadily to the marble floor beneath the dais.

"Kvasir is right," Tyr finally said, breaking the silence. "I've only ever seen that shade of green once – while talking to the evil God who killed my father. They're Loki's eyes, I'd swear to it."

"He has a Godly bearing, too," Vor commented, twisting her dainty silver ring on her finger. "The way he stood up to us today, it was very intriguing. Reason tells me he's not a normal man."

"AllFather, we need to know who this man is," Kvasir told Odin. "You've read Asgeirr's reports, and so have I. No mortal should be doing what Hiccup is doing. No mortal should have been able to pass the mental training so quickly. No mortal should have been able to defeat Freyja with two strokes of a sword. And from what Thor told us about Hiccup's entrance to Valhalla, he seems even less like a man and more like a God. The Guardian at the Valhalla gate said Hiccup was not a human. Who is he?"

"He's no one!" Odin exploded. "His father is a bludgeon-headed idiot from a primitive tribe of Hooligans on Midgard! His family has always been idiots."

"Your little purple-eyed seer told you this?" Forseti asked.

"Yes," Odin snapped. "She can look into Hiccup's mind, his past, and find out where he came from."

"What about his mother?" Vor queried. "Hiccup is not a giant, muscled moron like most so-called Vikings. He's highly intelligent. If his father's side of the family is a gaggle of simpletons, then his wisdom must come from his mother's side. That is actually a good point. Did his father have green eyes?"

"Yes." Odin sounded hollow. "But they're not the same, they're too dull. But he also knows his mother had similar eyes. His mother was killed by dragons when Hiccup was a child. He never knew her, and so my seer could not know her either."

"Then we need to find out who his mother was and where she came from," Kvasir stated. "Certainly she was quite unique, to have a son like Hiccup."

"Hiccup's father would know the most about Hiccup's mother," Vor stated. "We need to have one of our seers speak with Hiccup's father about his mother. There may be an answer as to why Hiccup is so unnaturally gifted."

Odin rose to his feet, the eyes of the Council following him. The AllFather looked in turn at each of his fellow Council members.

"I'll consider it," he said, and then left.

Uninhabited Isle, 2 miles North of Bog Burglar Island, Day 14 since Hiccup's Departure

A loud horn rang out over the choppy waters, waking Astrid Hofferson from a dark and dreary dream. Blinking slowly, she found her head resting on a hard leather shoulderplate, with the wind whipping in her ears and hair. She was sitting on a dragon, and the dragon was sailing above the sea, flapping his wings with a steady pulse. Astrid was seated behind Thuggory, her arms wrapped around the boy's waist and her head resting on his shoulder. She straightened up, and Thuggory noticed. He turned his head back to talk to her, his brown hair waving in the breeze.

"We're at the island!" he shouted to her over the wind. "The one where you left your comrade and your dragon. We'll be landing in a few minutes. Now you won't have to ride with me and Killer anymore."

"Right," Astrid shouted back, turning to look behind her at Thuggory's wolf Killer, who was curled up in his own special saddle behind her. The wolf acknowledged Astrid with a slow blink of his deep, sad eyes. It appeared the animal was used to long, dull flights.

Looking up again, Astrid saw that they were flying in the middle of a giant horde of dragon riders. About a quarter of the riders from Berk, Meathead Island, and Bashem Island were flying with them, creating a cloud of dragons, which from a distance must have looked like a swarm of bugs. The other three quarters of the army had left before them.

"Kind of a shame, really!" Thuggory grinned back at her. "You're fun to fly with – until you sleep, that is. You've been using my shoulder as a pillow since we left!"

"Oh, shut up," Astrid answered, but allowed a smile to come to her lips.

"All right, we're coming in to land!" Thuggory yelled exultingly. "I've done it a million times but landing is still fun! Hold on!"

Astrid gripped Thuggory's armor and held firmly onto the leather as Furious opened his wings to land. The air roared past as the grey Monstrous Nightmare's feet struck the ground, jolting Astrid against Thuggory's back. They were on the island, the same island that Astrid and the gang had regrouped after the raid on the Bog several days ago.

Thuggory and Astrid slid off the dragon, and as soon as Astrid hit the earth she wavered, and grabbed Thuggory's shoulder to steady herself. The ground was shaking!

Thuggory was feeling the ground shake also, and he turned to look at Astrid, laughing. "Who knew that an army of dragons landing could create an earthquake?" He chuckled.

Astrid looked around, and saw scores of dragons landing all over the island, the constant thud of their feet hitting the ground causing a genuine tremble on the island. In fact, they were late – the isle already looked like a war camp, for most of the group was already there, and pitched tents and lit fires.

"Wow," she said, staring at the ensemble. It was an awe-inspiring sight. Rows of tents, neatly organized, spanned the length of the area. Dragons were perched in trees and all over. In the middle there was a massive tent, which had the banners of all three allied tribes flying over it. It looked professional and well-organized, nothing like the typical Viking battle setup.

"Pretty impressive, huh?" Thuggory reached up to Furious' back to unbuckle his wolf Killer from his saddle. "This is Bashem Island battle organization. Chief Elcroy, the battle genius, is behind all this coordination and tent setup."

"It's incredible," Astrid wowed, still gazing at the sight in wonder. "I've never seen anything like it. It looks so – cool. All those tents, so neatly lined up."

"That it does." Thuggory finished unstrapping Killer, and the big grey wolf leapt down to stand at Thuggory and Astrid's side. "I have one of those big tents because I'm royalty," Thuggory explained, pointing to a large red one in the center of the area. "You should have a family tent with your parents somewhere, and it'll have a Berkian crest on it."

"I see," Astrid said. "How do you know so much about this, Thug?"

"I've been around." Thuggory said shortly. "And I like to learn. I'm not a smart guy, but I'm a good listener. I've been dropping in on Chief Elcroy and Fishlegs' discussions, and I've also been talking with Fishlegs a lot. That's how I learned about this."

Astrid was about to reply, but suddenly there was a rush of air above them and a green and yellow Nadder swooped over their heads, doing a neat little half circle before landing smoothly in front of them. A black haired girl leapt off the Nadder, her catlike eyes smiling. It was Heather.

"Astrid!" Heather shouted, walking up to her friend, the Nadder following behind her. "You'll never guess what happened! I found myself a dragon of my own!"

Astrid laughed, and Heather, coming up, gave Astrid a joyous hug. "It was just like you said," Heather said proudly. "I was taking care of Stormfly and then this dragon just came and landed. It knew Stormfly was injured and wanted to help. But when I first saw her I just knew – and we touched each other, and then it just happened! I have a dragon now, it's so cool!"

Astrid laughed. "It was bound to happen sooner or later," she smiled. "Is it a he or a she? What's the name?

"Oh, it's a girl," Heather announced. "And I named her Windshear, because she just cuts through the air like a hot knife through butter, isn't that right, girl?" She patted Windshear's snout.

"That's wonderful," Astrid said, happy for her friend.

"It is, and Stormfly recovered perfectly from all the arrow wounds," Heather assured her. "She's at your parent's tent, waiting for you. You're late, most of the army arrived over three hours ago. What took you so long?"

"Well, Thug likes to be the last person to leave, apparently," Astrid said, turning to Thuggory. "Heather, this is Thuggory, the heir of the Meathead tribe."

Heather's mouth parted. "Thuggory? I barely – it's – it's nice to meet you."

"Good to meet you, too," Thuggory smiled, extending a hand. "I'm sorry if I'm looking at you funny, but I could swear I've seen you before."

"I – I don't think we've met," Heather stammered, as she took Thuggory's hand. She cast her eyes downward.

Thuggory's brows furrowed. "You seem very familiar to me. Interesting. Anyway, Astrid tells me you're quite the warrior."

"She exaggerates," Heather grinned, but her smile seemed off. She looked nervous, and never met the boy's cool brown eyes. Instead, she kept darting glances behind Thuggory. Thuggory noticed and turned.

"Ah," he said. "Heather, this is my wolf, Killer."

Killer turned and his gleaming eyes locked on Heather's as he approached. "Killer is my battle companion," Thuggory said. "There's no need to be afraid of him."

Heather looked at the wolf in fear, and suddenly Killer's attitude changed. He bared his teeth and snarled viciously, the hair on his back bristling.

"What is it!?" Thuggory forgot everything else and leapt towards the wolf. "Killer, what?"

Killer gave a savage snarl at Heather, and Thuggory turned. Heather was very nervous now, and took a step back.

"He doesn't like you," Thuggory said slowly, taking a step towards Heather. "Killer doesn't hate anyone until he has a reason to. He's seen you before. Where?"

"I – I" Heather couldn't get out any words, but her hand fell to her sword. Thuggory's eyes followed her movement, and as he saw the sword, his eyes widened.

"I know you!" He roared, leaping forward and seizing Heather by the throat. "Don't you touch that sword!" He grabbed Heather's wrist with one hand as she tried to grab her blade, and then punched her solidly in the kidney. Heather crumpled, and Thuggory, his hand still on her throat, lifted her onto her toes by her neck.

"YOU!" He shouted. "I know where I've seen you before! You fought against my tribe in the Meathead/Outcast war! I remember you! You were that black haired bitch that cut down scores of my men! By Thor! You fought for the Outcasts!"

Windshear growled and sprang forward to help her rider, but Furious, Thuggory's dragon, stepped up to stop her. Windshear took one look at the vicious Monstrous Nightmare and the two dragons began to circle each other, glaring and snarling. Thuggory kept his hold on Heather.

"Thuggory!" Astrid yelled, jumping forward and grabbing the boy's strong arm. "Stop it!"

"She's an Outcast!" he yelled to Astrid.

"No she's not, Thug!" Astrid tugged at Thuggory's arm. "She's not an Outcast! She's was a mercenary! She would sell her sword to the highest bidder! The Outcasts must have hired her during that war. She's not evil!"

Thuggory's grip weakened, then tightened again. "Oh really?" He barked. "Is she branded, Astrid? All Outcasts have a black cross branded on their backs, right? Does she?"

Astrid hesitated. "I – I don't know," she said slowly.

"We'll find out." Thuggory jerked Heather over by her neck, pinning the girl on his knee. With one hand he grabbed the hem of her shirt and tore it off, breast bindings with it, baring her back and shoulders.

As they looked at Heather's bare back, both Astrid and Thuggory stared in shock.

There was no Outcast brand. However, there was something even more shocking.

Heather's back looked horrifying. There were scores and scores of red, mottled scars crisscrossed across her backbone and curling around to her sides. She had been brutally whipped. Her spine also had ugly burn scars up and down it. Heather had suffered some cruel torment at some point in her life.

"My God," Thuggory whispered in shock, and let Heather go. Heather collapsed to the dirt, coughing, and Windshear squawked in rage. Thuggory laid a hand on the pommel of his sword.

After a few gasps, Heather scrambled to her feet again, her eyes blazing. Covering her breasts with one hand, she wrenched her curved blade out her sheath with the other, the wicked steel shining.

"Don't. Ever. Touch. Me." She threatened Thuggory, still gasping for air but also white with rage. She was shaking with emotion. "You had no right to do that to me!"

"I did, though." Thuggory put a soothing hand on Killer's neck, who was bristling, ready to attack Heather at any time. "I could and should have you executed for crimes against my tribe,Heather."

"Thug, don't do that!" Astrid pleaded. "She's had a rough life."

"Thor above!" Thuggory gritted his teeth. "Dammit, you black-haired demon!"

Heather turned to look at Astrid, tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she told her friend brokenly, then turned and ran for Windshear. Sheathing her sword, she jumped on her Nadder and immediately took off, flying away from the island, into the distance.

"Heather!" Astrid shouted after her, but she was already too far to hear the call. All Astrid could do was stare helplessly as the shape of Windshear faded.

Astrid turned to Thuggory angrily. "Why did you do that?!"

"You don't understand." Thuggory was quiet. "You didn't fight in the Meathead/Outcast war, Astrid. Last year the Outcasts invaded the Meathead Isles by boat. The attack was led by Alvin the Treacherous, you know him. The Outcasts tried to take our land, kill our children, and take us all as slaves. They almost won. This was right after Hiccup taught us about the dragons, and it was our first war with the dragons on our side. With their help, we managed to ward off the invaders. There was one battle in particular that I recall. We were outnumbered two to one. I was in charge of thirty of my men and the Outcasts had ninety. And she was there."

Thuggory paused. "She – Heather - was in front, cutting down my men one by one. I crossed blades with her, and fended her off until the dragons arrived to overrun the Outcasts."

Thuggory turned to stare off at the distant shape of Heather's dragon. "Twenty-two Meatheads fell that day. And she was leading the group. I saw her many times after that, always fighting, just a killing machine."

Astrid said nothing.

Thuggory turned on her. "She has committed crimes against my tribe and deserves to die. Why should I spare her?"

Astrid swallowed. "Because she isn't an Outcast, Thuggory. She needed money. She was desperate, and I think she still is. I don't know what her story is, but you saw her. She was beaten. Maybe she was forced to fight for the Outcasts. Now she is fighting for us. She will make up for the lives she took from your tribe."

Thuggory shook his head. "I'll bring up the matter with my father. For now, if she comes back, arrest her."

And with that he turned his back on Astrid and strode into the sea of tents, Killer and Furious following him.

High Asgard, Day 14 since Hiccup's Departure

Hiccup stood sullenly in a small, cramped room. If it was not for the simple wooden door and well-lit windows, he would have thought it was a prison cell. Maybe it was; after all, he had been very disrespectful towards the Asgardian Council and might have assumed that he was imprisoned for it, but he knew otherwise.

His final test for Level one was beginning.

This was the only thing Hiccup knew. Odin had ordered Asgeirr to begin it immediately, ad a command from the AllFather had to be obeyed. It was only a matter of how soon it would begin, and Hiccup tried to forget the frustrations that he had dealt with in the council and focus on the test – whatever it might be.

Just then the wooden door opened, and someone entered. Hiccup's eyes lit up. It was not Asgeirr. It was Alaedlar.

"Master," Hiccup grinned.

"Hiccup," Alaedlar acknowledged. "It's good to see you again."

"And you," Hiccup said. "I've only been getting into more trouble since you last saw me."

"I know," Alaedlar laughed. "I was there, watching the Council meeting from the gallery. By the Gods, what you did was brash, stupid, and insane, but on my life," Alaedlar threw his head back, "It was satisfying! I have never seen anyone treat the Gods with such disrespect before, and while I'm not encouraging it, I just loved seeing those pompous fools taken down a notch! Oh, I loved it!"

Hiccup joined in Alaedlar's laugh. "It was kind of stupid, though," he admitted ruefully. "Maybe if I was a little more respectful I might have made a deal."

Alaedlar shook his head. "I doubt it. There was no way they would ever acknowledge you got the better of them – they are too proud."

Hiccup sighed. "I just want to let Astrid know I'm all right."

"I understand," Alaedlar said sympathetically. "But that is now done with. Your final test is the next step."

Hiccup took a deep breath. "Very well. When does it begin?"

"Now." Alaedlar took a step forward. "Here are the rules for the test. In a few minutes Asgeirr will come in here. He will command you to do some things that you will NOT like. However, if you do not obey his commands to the letter, you fail. No matter what they are. If he tells you to gouge out your eyeball, you have to do it. Is that clear?"

Hiccup blinked. "Very well."

"I am going to give you some commands myself, right now," Alaedlar said. "You have to obey or you fail, and have to redo several training policies, even possibly The Wolf. You won't get to see Toothless for a while."

"I understand," Hiccup affirmed quietly.

"Hiccup, do you trust me?" Alaedlar asked suddenly.

Hiccup blinked. He had never considered that question before, and the fact that Alaedlar asked it caught him off guard. Did he trust Alaedlar? Maybe it was time to find out.

He locked gazes with the silver-haired elf, using the tricks that Loki had told him he was gifted at. The eyes are the gateway to the mind. Alaedlar blinked but then met Hiccup's intent scrutiny. Hiccup stared deep into the elf's eyes, looking for the secrets, the lies and truths that the eyes held. At first, all seemed clear. Alaedlar was indeed an honest individual who was telling Hiccup the truth. But then Hiccup began to see something different in the depths of Alaedlar's eyes. There was something strange. Something was not right. It was almost as if -"

Alaedlar blinked, and Hiccup lost focus. Slowly he nodded.

"Yes, Master. I trust you. There is something about you that is not right, but I trust you."

Alaedlar inclined his head. "Very well. Then obey these commands without question."

"I will." Hiccup affirmed.

Alaedlar smiled. "This is my first command to you."

Hiccup waited, his eyes intent, ready to obey.

"Give me Hicca." Alaedlar said firmly.

Hiccup blinked. Of all the commands that he could have guessed Alaedlar might give him, that was the last. Alaedlar was the one who had told him that Hicca and he were one, and now he was ordering him to give it up. But if he didn't, Hiccup failed the test. He could not let that happen.

Reaching up slowly, he unbuckled Hicca's sheath, and handed the sword to Alaedlar.

Alaedlar took it, and then gave his second command.

"Take off your armor, shirt, and shoes."

Hiccup was once again surprised, but more amused this time. Without hesitation or question, he unbuckled the beautiful black chestplate, his belt, his greaves and shoes, and piled them neatly beside him. He now stood shirtless, only wearing his black pants and Astrid's Nadder scale, which still sat bright and blue around his neck. He wondered if Alaedlar would take it also.

Alaedlar did not. Instead the elf pulled a black cloth from his pocket. He handed it to Hiccup along with his third command.

"Blindfold yourself," he ordered.

Hiccup was startled, but he obeyed. He took the cloth and tied it firmly over his eyes, so he could see nothing around him or in front of him. He was completely blind.

"Very good." Alaedlar said. "Now I will leave you and Asgeirr will arrive shortly. You will NOT speak. You will NOT resist anything he does. You will do as he commands and say nothing until he instructs you otherwise. Is that clear?"

Hiccup nodded, catching himself before he broke the rules and spoke.

"Then wait here."

Alaedlar left, his footsteps fading.

Hiccup took a deep breath. He didn't know why, but some sense of impending doom was upon him. He was afraid, and for no reason other than the fear of the unknown. He had received several hints as to what this test involved, and he was only aware that it involved some kind of physical recovery and also Dragon Iron. He had no idea what kind of combination that was.

Footsteps interrupted his thoughts, and he opened his ears, trying to hear anything unordinary. The voice of Asgeirr spoke.

"Riddari." Then a powerful hand grabbed Hiccup's arm. "Come with me."

It was a command, and Hiccup obeyed. With Asgeirr's strong hand on his arm, he walked with the Warlock for a little ways, taking several turns and walking down several halls. Then a lock rattled, and a door opened. Together Hiccup and Asgeirr stepped into a room.

Hiccup's senses immediately took in the room. He could not see, but he could feel and smell and hear, and what he gathered did not appeal to him.

His feet were now standing on roughhewn stone, not smooth marble, and it was very, very hot. As he listened and smelled, he knew why. There was a very hot fire nearby, and it was being used to melt metal. He could smell the hot steel, and he could also hear the bubbling of liquid. Something clicked in his head. Dragon Iron. They were melting down Dragon Iron. But why?

Asgeirr led him a few more steps forward and Hiccup heard the door close behind him with a thud.

Asgeirr spoke. "Directly in front of you is a stone slab, Riddari. Lay down on it."

Hiccup stood still for a second and then obeyed, his heart pumping like mad. He had no idea what was going on. Slowly he climbed onto the rock slab and laid down, the rough stone digging into his back. He silently cursed the blindfold. If only he could see!

He heard Asgeirr move to the other side of the stone slab, and then the Warlock reached out and shifted one of Hiccup's arms slightly. As he did so, Asgeirr's hand bumped against the stone and made a metallic clink.

Hiccup grinned. That's right. Asgeirr must have a rough time of it, having metal bones in his hand all the time. Sure, there must be tons of benefits, but the noise every time his bones hit something hard must be annoying. They were made of Dragon Iron. Dragon Iron…

DRAGON IRON!

Suddenly Hiccup realized what was happening, and with a roar, he tried to sit up. But even as he did so, metal bands came crashing down on him, pinning his wrists, his arms, his ankles, his thighs, and his waist. He was pinned to the stone, utterly helpless.

"NOOOOOO!" Hiccup roared, struggling. "NO!"

Asgeirr tore off the blindfold, and Hiccup, snarling in rage and terror, realized where exactly he was.

He was in a torture cell. The room was cluttered and lined with all sorts of vile torture devices. There was a raging furnace off to one side, in which sat several fireplace pokers. Above the furnace was a giant cauldron containing bubbling metal.

Asgeirr stood above him, tall and terrible.

"This is your test for Level one," he said grimly. "And it is simple. All you have to do is refuse to answer one question, no matter what. The question is this. Where is the Sword of Death?"

Hiccup was breathing deeply, realizing at last what was actually going on. He glared up at Asgeirr.

"Damn you, Asgeirr!" He yelled. "Damn you to Hel!"

"Very good." Asgeirr smiled. "We'll see if you can keep that up."

Turning, he walked out of the room, and Hiccup roared in fear and rage, tugging at his bonds. He wanted to scream at his helplessness, and knowing that he was about to be tortured only fueled his panic. They were going to do terrible things to him. They were going to melt down his bones and make them Dragon Iron, and only the Gods knew what else.

The door opened again, and Hiccup stopped his struggles and twisted his head to look at the newcomer. It was a man, or at least, he assumed it was a man. The being wore an ugly spiked mask, half black, half white. In his hand he held a tray of assorted tools and torture devices.

Hiccup took deep, calming breaths as the masked man set down his tray by the fire, the metal clinking menacingly. Then he stepped up to the stone slab and spoke in an unpleasant, grating voice.

"You are Riddari Hiccup Haddock of Midgard," he stated. His voice betrayed absolutely no emotion whatsoever. "And I am called Eclipse. If anyone ever tells you they have the worst job in the world, then laugh at them and tell them that they are wrong. I have the worst job in the world." Eclipse let out a gurgled laugh. "This is the most disgusting and unpleasant job anyone could ever ask for. But -" he paused. "I LOVE it."

Hiccup snarled, and Eclipse laughed, his evil voice echoing in the small stone room. "Yes, indeed, Riddari Hiccup! I LOVE my job. I am a torturer. I love making people feel pain. I love breaking them. I am told you will be hard to break. But I will break you." His voice became a low whisper. "Oh yes, I will break you. I am quite the expert at this sort of thing."

"You are sick." Hiccup spat at him. "Get on with it, you Thor-damned swine!"

"I am sick." Eclipse turned from Hiccup and walked over to the fire, where three pokers were laid in the roaring flames. "I am sick with the love of making things feel agony. And you are about to experience more pain than you have ever felt in your life."

Hiccup believed him. Eclipse picked up one of the pokers and turned back around. Underneath his mask he was grinning, and his teeth were jagged and yellow. Hiccup's eyes went to the poker. It was so hot the tip glowed white.

Eclipse came up beside Hiccup's head, and with a movement of his free hand, closed a metal band around Hiccup's forehead, which latched to the slab. Hiccup's head was now entirely immobile. He wanted to scream, to beg, to cry. But he could not. His pride, his honor, his life, were all at stake. He was a Viking. He was a man.

Eclipse smiled. "You know that you are going to be in terrible agony," he mocked. "You will scream, you will yell, you will cry. It will have no effect on me. You will have the most painful time of your life. And yet," he paused, "You can stop it all. All you have to do is tell me where the Sword of Death is, and it will all stop. Your wounds will heal, and you will be released."

"Stop lying!" Hiccup screamed, his voice cracking. "I know it all! If I tell you where it is, I fail this test, and I'll have to do it all over again! Curse you! Curse all of them! Do it! Torture me, come on!"

Eclipse smiled with a sigh of pleasure. "As you wish," he said smugly. He raised the red-hot poker above Hiccup's face. The metal was so hot Hiccup could feel it from a full foot away. As he looked at the tip of the poker, Eclipse steadily lowered it towards his left eye. Hiccup suddenly gasped. Carved into the end of the poker was a face of a wolf-headed man.

"Where is the Sword of Death?" Eclipse asked suddenly, halting the hot iron right in front of Hiccup's eye. It was a question Hiccup would hear in his nightmares for years to come.

"NEVER!" Hiccup yelled, his voice cracking.

"So be it," Eclipse smiled, and let the hot iron fall on Hiccup's eye.

Hiccup screamed.

Uninhabited Isle, 2 miles North of Bog Burglar Island, Day 14 since Hiccup's Departure

"Stormfly!"

Astrid pounced upon her beloved blue dragon, and the Nadder let out a joyful squawk as Astrid hung on her neck, hugging the dragon tightly.

"Oh, it's only been a few days and I missed you so much, Stormfly," Astrid sighed, snuggling her face into the hard blue scales. "Are you OK?"

Stormfly let out a squawk and nipped Astrid playfully with her beak. Smiling, Astrid stood and scratched her dragon happily. Glancing at the areas where Stormfly had been shot with arrows, she saw that they were healing nicely. Just like herself.

"Are mom and dad inside that tent, girl?" Astrid asked, giving Stormfly a final scratch on the chin.

Stormfly bobbed her head yes as Astrid gestured to the tent next to them.

"Great," Astrid said. "I've got to go talk to them and then we may go for a flight. We may have to go look for Heather, OK, girl?"

Stormfly squawked happily again, ecstatic that Astrid had returned. With one more smile at her faithful dragon, Astrid brushed aside the tent flaps and found herself in a large, cozy tent, with log benches on either side of a nice warm fire.

Her father and mother were there, and so was another person. It was Bashhead, the big girl who was the daughter of Chief Elcroy and the heiress of Bashem Island. And she was in Astrid's tent, talking with her parents like old friends.

"Hey mom, dad," Astrid said, as they all looked up. "Hi Bashhead."

"Hi, Astrid!" Ingrid smiled. "We were wondering how long you would take to arrive. You look a little exhausted. Would you like some tea?"

"Yes, please," Astrid groaned, sitting down on the log next to her father. "It was a rough flight."

"What, isn't Thuggory a nice guy?" Ingrid asked. "You wanted to fly with him."

"Oh, he's very nice," Astrid said quickly. Too quickly. Ingrid raised an eyebrow but said nothing. Astrid stammered and then went on. "It's just that I'm so tired, that's why I didn't like the flight. I couldn't really enjoy it because I was asleep."

"Right," Astrid's father Sven said. "And hey, your mother and I need to go and help Gobber get some armor of ours fixed for the battle tomorrow. Bashhead here came by to talk to you, so we'll be off and let you two alone."

"Where's Elaith?" Astrid asked, looking around the tent for her little sister. "I thought you brought her along, too."

"Oh, your sister is with all the little children in Gothi's tent," Ingrid replied. "It's nice to have all the little children away from the battle, but we didn't want to leave her back on Berk. She'll be around later."

"Right," Astrid said.

"The tea is on the fire, have as much of it as you want," Ingrid assured Astrid and Bashhead. "Sven, let's go."

"We'll be back in an hour or so," Astrid's father said, and then the two ducked out of the tent, the flaps closing behind them. Astrid turned to Bashhead, and the big girl from Bashem Island grinned at her.

"Your parents are nice," Bashhead asserted, stretching her legs apart, one on either side of the fire. "And good warriors, too. I just have one complaint."

Astrid raised her eyebrows. "Oh?"

"They didn't give me ale!" Bashhead laughed, picking up her cup of tea disdainfully. "This tea is very good, but I'm a tough girl, give me some tough stuff!"

Astrid laughed with her.

"Ah well, my family only likes to drink ale at meals and celebrations," Astrid chuckled, talking a healthy gulp of her own tea. "Stop whining, Bashhead, you just said you were a tough girl, deal with it."

"Oh, I can deal with that," Bashhead waved a strong hand. "I just like whining. But you know what I can't deal with?"

Astrid looked up. "No. What?"

"See, that's what I came here to talk about," Bashhead said. She set her mug down and leaned back, adjusting the sword on her belt. "I'm frankly disappointed in the way things are going. I mean, it looks like we're going to kick ass and all, but despite all of General Fishleg's and my crazy smart father's strategies, they're missing one thing that can come in very handy in a war."

"And what's that?" Astrid asked, intensely focused.

"An elite squad," Bashhead smiled. She leaned forward. "A group of the best soldiers in the army, who work together as a team and kick some ass. The group that is placed at the front of the battle and does the heavy damage. The best warriors."

"And you're saying we need such a group?" Astrid asked.

"Yes, and I'm not the only one," Bashhead said. "I talked to your friend, General Fishlegs. He heard me out, then agreed with me. He says he will give me the front lines in the battle tomorrow, and I will be the brunt of attack force, me and my elite companions. He assigned me to make the group."

"And – you're here because?" Astrid asked, even though she knew the answer.

"I want you." Bashhead grinned. "I'm looking for the best soldiers, and not just the strongest and biggest, but the smartest. Thuggory is leading the Meatheads in the front, he can't waste time doing what we will be doing. Neither can any of the royalty, for that matter. I would have chosen that badass Tuffnut, but he's Thuggory's right-hand man and can't leave him. Regardless. I need the best, and that's you. Will you join me?"

Astrid met Bashhead's eyes and then nodded. "Yes. I will join your elite squadron, Bashhead."

"Yes!" Bashhead shouted exultingly. "I knew you would. We'll show those Bog Burglars that the dragon riders are the best! "She spat into her hand and held it out. "Shake on it, Astrid."

Astrid looked at the spit-covered palm and grinned. She wasn't afraid of a little spittle. She spat in her own hand, and their palms made a disgusting splat as the two shieldmaidens shook hands.

"I already have some of the best from Bashem Island and the Meathead Isles, just like three or four," Bashhead stated. "With you the group makes five, but I want one more. That black-haired girl you left here. Fishlegs told me to make sure I got her. Is she any good?"

"She's incredible," Astrid said. "She's absolutely ruthless. But – that may be a problem. She left."

"Left?" Bashhead stared. "She left on the eve of battle?"

"No – I don't know," Astrid sighed. "Heather – that's her name - she flew off. Thuggory met her and recognized her as a mercenary that fought for the Outcasts in the Meathead/Outcast war a year ago. He threatened her and scared her, or maybe Killer did most of the scaring. Anyway, she flew away in tears, and Thuggory might have her executed if she comes back."

"Oh, bah!" Bashhead snorted. "I'll talk to Thuggory. If this Heather is a loyal soldier and can help us, then I want her. She can make up for her crimes against the Meatheads by fighting for us. After the Dragon Wars, surely he should learn that our enemies are not always our enemies."

Bashhead rose. "However."

Astrid raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"Uh, I forgot." Bashhead fiddled with her sword. "You're a part of my group now, but you – you can't fight with us tomorrow."

"What?!" Astrid set her cup down. "What do you mean?"

"It was orders." Bashhead looked up. "General Fishlegs' orders. Look, I still want you, and in the future, we'll fight together, but Fishlegs said you're not going to be allowed to fight in the front lines tomorrow."

"You're yak-shitting me." Astrid tossed her cup to the ground, hot tea spilling over the dusty ground.

"I'm not. You'll have to take it up with the General," Bashhead said. "I – I'd love to have you with me tomorrow, but -" she sighed. "Orders are orders, and I guess Fishlegs has his reasons."

With that final word, Bashhead turned and left, ducking out of the tent, her broadsword swinging from her waist.

Astrid rose. "Orders!" she muttered, both confused and furious. "What the hell?"

Astrid strode angrily through the camp, which was busy with the shouts of men, the growls and squawks of dragons. It was only ten hours until they flew to the Bog – to battle and war. Things were getting serious. Astrid's destination was the Commander's tent, where General Fishlegs, newly promoted, sat planning. He had for some reason stated that Astrid was not going to be allowed to fight in the front lines, and this made Astrid both furious and confused. She had no idea why.

"Hey, are you Astrid Hofferson?" Someone suddenly called, and from the side of one of the tents a boy emerged. He was dressed in light leather armor and had the Meathead crest on his breastplate. He wasn't the usual Viking warrior, in fact, he was even smaller than Astrid.

Astrid acknowledged him with a curt nod, and not stopping. "That's me."

"I've heard about you," the boy said, jogging to catch up with Astrid, his short sword banging on his hip. "I've heard you're the best warrior on Berk."

"So have I," Astrid snapped. "And I get pretty violent when people annoy me."

"It's an honor to meet you," the boy said. "My name is-"

"I don't care what your name is!" Astrid blurted angrily, whirling on him. "Look, I am NOT in the mood for this. Go and coddle your dragon or something, I'm busy."

The boy stopped. He seemed offended. "All right," he said. "Sorry for bothering you."

Astrid left him behind, but began to feel somewhat sorry for treating the boy so meanly. Hiccup wouldn't have approved. Who was that boy, anyway?

However, the sympathy didn't last long. She remembered why she was so mad as soon as she saw the large red commander's tent, in which Fishlegs was stationed. Her old anger returned, and she stormed up to the entrance, ready to give Fishlegs a good shoutdown. Approaching the tent, Astrid was stopped by two Vikings from Bashem Island, in their neat black armor and spears. They were guarding the tent.

"Do you have an appointment with General Fishlegs?" One asked, as they lowered their spears to block her entry to the tent.

"No, I don't have an appointment," Astrid snapped. "I'm here to talk to Fishlegs about the battle. Is he in there?"

"Yeah, you and every other Viking in the camp," the guard retorted. "He's busy, girl. He won't see anyone."

"Don't girl me!" Astrid exploded. "I'm his friend, let me in there! He'll see me, or he'd better, if he knows what's good for him!"

"Name?" the guard asked sourly.

"Astrid Hilf Hofferson, you Thor-damned goons," Astrid growled angrily. "Get your spears out of my way."

The guard resented her tone, but leaned into the tent. He did not let Astrid pass. He called, "General? An Astrid Hofferson wants to see you."

"Oh." A familiar voice called from the tent. It was Fishlegs. "Send her in," Fishlegs called.

The guard turned back, his face pinched. "All right, Astrid Hofferson. Go on in."

"How kind of you," Astrid muttered sarcastically, and slapped aside the tent flap, going inside. There, in a very large and sizeable tent, sat Fishlegs, with piles of papers on a smooth wooden desk. Piled on the sides of the tent were books, and leaning against his chair was his wooden crossbow. The tent itself was quite luxurious, with furs lining the floor and a cozy fire in the back. There was no one in the tent except Fishlegs. The chubby general was sitting with his brown-haired head bent over a parchment. He didn't even look up when Astrid entered.

Astrid hadn't spoken directly to Fishlegs since their conversation on the very island on which they stood now, and she hadn't even seen him much since his promotion to Battle General. He didn't seem to be much changed. Astrid strode right up to his desk and stopped, ready to give him an upbraiding.

"All right, Legs," she said aggressively, talking down to Fishlegs, who was seated calmly in his chair. "What is this yak-shit I'm hearing about you not letting me fight tomorrow?"

Fishlegs didn't look up. He didn't even acknowledge that Astrid was in the tent.

"I'm one of the best Thor-damned warriors in this army," Astrid went on, growing angrier. "Bashhead wants me to fight in the front lines with her, and so do I! I want to be the first one to the battle! Fishlegs, you are GOING to put me in that group tomorrow. I want to be in the battle, in the front lines, fighting."

Astrid stopped her tirade, and glowered down at the chubby boy. Fishlegs, his head still bowed, finished writing his sentence. Without setting his pencil down, he finally looked up, meeting Astrid's glare with his calm brown eyes.

"No," he said, and looked down to start writing again.

"You don't understand!" Astrid roared, stepping forward and slamming her fist on Fishleg's desk, causing it to shake. "What are you doing to me, you fat fool!? I'm a warrior! I'm one of the best! You know that! Why aren't you letting me fight? I don't get it!"

Fishlegs sighed, and, setting his pencil down, leaned back in his chair. He looked steadily up at Astrid, and spoke calmly.

"I'm not going to let you fight in the front lines tomorrow, Astrid," he said. "I didn't just decide to do it randomly, I made that decision for three reasons."

"What fucking reasons?" Astrid blurted.

"One." Fishlegs raised a finger. "You're injured and your dragon is also injured. Anyone in the front line needs to be fully fit and ready to fight. The front gets all the heavy action. You're not healed yet."

"I am healed!" Astrid argued. "I'm perfectly fine! That reason is yakshit!"

Fishlegs laughed. "No, you're not fine, Astrid," he said. "I removed that arrow myself, and trust me, that wound will be affecting your performance for another week at least. You're not in your best form right now, and I can't have you risked like that, which brings me to reason two." He raised a second finger. "I promised Hiccup I'd keep you safe, and putting you injured in the front lines is NOT that." He raised another finger. "And finally, this is the most important reason why." He paused, then suddenly snapped at Astrid.

"Why do you want to be in the front lines?"

Astrid was stunned, then started to answer. "So that I can – so that I can kill – so that I can do the most good for the army," she stammered.

"That's YAKshit." Fishlegs shook his brown head. "Astrid, we both know what you want. You want Camicazi. That's why you are so determined to fight in the front lines. You're going to ignore any battle plans I give your group if you get the chance to fight that blonde-haired witch. You'll potentially endanger Bashhead's whole group, and I can't have that." Fishlegs looked up at Astrid.

"Be honest, Astrid. Would you go after Camicazi for revenge even if it went against my plan, like you did during the raid?"

"I -" Astrid wavered.

"Be honest!" Fishlegs snapped.

Astrid looked up. "Yes. I would!"

"That's why." Fishlegs leaned back and picked up his pencil once more. "I can't have warriors going off and fighting their own private battles while I'm trying to win a war. If I do this right, we'll crush the entire Bog today, and I can't have any rogue elements messing up the plan, like you. So my decision stands and let me make it official."

Fishlegs pointed his pencil at Astrid. "I'm giving you a command right now, from a general to a subordinate. You, Astrid Hofferson, will not fight in the front lines tomorrow. There is going to be three main assaults, one led by Thuggory and his meatheads, one led by Stoick and the Berkians, and one led by Bashhead and the best warriors. You are not to fight in ANY of those groups. You will remain with the archers in the rear, and engage in NO hand-to-hand combat unless absolutely necessary."

Astrid stood ramrod stiff, her lips pressed tight.

"Is that clear, Astrid?" Fishlegs said emphatically.

"I thought you were my friend, Legs," Astrid said sadly, casting her eyes downward. "Let me kill Camicazi."

Fishlegs blinked. "Is that clear?" He asked again, calmly.

Astrid looked up. "Yes,General," she sneered, and spun on her heel, leaving the tent.

Astrid was no longer enraged. Instead she was icy cold, bitter, and quiet. She knew there was no way she was going to obey Fishleg's order to stay away from the fighting, and she also knew that he was right. For the good of the Dragon Alliance, she should not fight in the group or with the army. However, if she wasn't a part of any group or any part of the battle, she could go after Camicazi alone. Still, in order to do that, she needed to get into the front lines. But how?

She had spent the last twenty minutes flinging her axe violently at trees, taking out her frustration on the forest. However, while it helped to soothe her anger, it did not solve her problem. With a deep sigh, Astrid sat down on a rock, leaning her trusty axe against the stone. Laying her chin in her hands, she began to think. She needed some way to get to the battle and at the same time make Fishlegs never know she was there. She needed a disguise.

"If I could just dress up as someone else to make sure I got to the front of the battle," she muttered. "I need a thin blonde girl like me, who wears a helmet. Then I could switch places with her and fight, and no one would recognize us. But who is there to swap with?"

Astrid furrowed her brows for a second and then laughed out loud.

Ruffnut. Ruffnut Thorston. She was thin, blonde, and always wore a helmet in battle! She was also with Tuffnut, who was Thuggory's wingman. Thuggory would be a part of the front action, which meant that Tuffnut and Ruffnut would be at his side. Ruffnut.

Astrid grinned, and with a laugh, grabbed her axe. She sprung off the rock, ready to run back to the camp. And there was someone there.

"Heather!" Astrid said with surprise.

"Yes, I'm back," Heather said, stepping forward. "I – I had to find you first, before I went back to the camp." Heather had a new black shirt on, and her sword still hung from her belt. Her face was slightly red from crying.

"Look, Heather, I'm sorry about what happened this morning," Astrid said, walking up to her friend. "I had no idea – I mean, Thuggory acted impulsively."

"He was right." Heather came up and sat down on the same rock Astrid had just been sitting on. Astrid turned and sat next to her. "I am a criminal. I fought against his tribe. But the Outcasts hired me, and I couldn't refuse, I was a mercenary, and Alvin paid me well."

"I'm honestly surprised you fought for them after what they did to you and your family," Astrid said quietly.

"I know," Heather said. "But it almost felt good – you know, to be in control of people who once had you in their control. I was a leader of the Outcasts in the battles, I got to yell and sneer at Alvin. It was enjoyable."

"Do you regret it?" Astrid asked.

"Yes," Heather sighed, "But not until today, until Thuggory yelled at me. He's such a brave guy. He's good, he's kind, and he's ferocious, and to see him there, my enemy – it was heartbreaking." Heather looked up, her green eyes meeting Astrid's. "And he wants to have me executed."

"He does not, I'm sure of it," Astrid consoled. "He was just mad. He'll have cooled off by now. Anyways, forget it. Let's go and talk to Hiccup's dad, chief Stoick. I'll ask him to talk to Mogadon, the Meathead chief, if your life ever come into the balance. He knows you, he knows you're good."

Heather smiled. "Thanks, Astrid, I actually would really appreciate that."

"Then let's go!" Astrid got up off the rock. "We'll go and talk to him."

Heather nodded, and with a smile, got off the rock. Astrid threw her arm over Heather's shoulders and they walked into the camp together.

"So," Astrid said. "Do you want to tell me about those scars on your back?"

Heather stiffened. "No."

"All right then," Astrid said cheerfully. "I won't ask, but officially I'm very curious. Those were terrible wounds, Heather."

"I know." Heather was short. "Look, I don't want to talk about my scars, Astrid. I can't."

"OK, OK, I'm sorry," Astrid agreed, giving her friend a squeeze. "Forget it, I won't ask about them again."

"Thanks," Heather said. The two girls had entered the main camp area, and they chanced upon Gobber, who was hobbling past on his peg leg.

"Hey, Gobber!" Heather called. "We're looking for Chief Stoick. Where is he?"

Gobber grinned at the girls. "He's in his personal tent," he drawled. "Relaxin before the big battle tomorrow. Ya girls talk ta him and then get ta sleep. Big day tomorrow. I never liked those Bog Burglars anyway."

"Who does? They lie, cheat, steal, and kill," Heather returned. "Thanks a bunch, Gobber. We'll get to bed."

"But only if you don't sing any songs!" Astrid laughed. "No lullabies floating over the tents tonight, Gobber. Don't even think about singing."

"Aw, is my singin really THAT bad?" Gobber asked.

"Yes!" Astrid called, and they passed on.

"So, where is the Chief's personal tent?" Astrid said. "I guess it's good that he's in there, alone."

"It's the big red one with the Berkian flag over it," Heather said. "I was here earlier and saw it. It's right in the middle, we're almost there."

To Astrid's great surprise there was no guard posted outside Stoick's tent. Fishlegs had two guards, and he was just a General. Stoick had none. Astrid pointed it out to Heather.

"I guess Stoick doesn't need a guard," Heather grinned. "Or maybe his pride won't allow it. Typical for a Viking chieftain."

Astrid laughed. "Well, let's see how reasonable he is. Time to talk to him."

Walking up to the tent entrance, Astrid rapped on the wooden post outside with her knuckles. "Chief Stoick!" She called. "Can we come in?"

There was a rustle in the tent, and then Stoick's voice came out.

"Yes, lass. Come on in."

Astrid looked at Heather, took a deep breath, and the two girls entered.

Chief Stoick's tent was rather simple. It was definitely more luxurious than any of the commoner's tents, but it lacked the feel of importance. Bearskin rugs were on the floor, and a large cot was in the corner. A table and chairs were on the other side, and a giant barrel that contained food and ale. Other than that, nothing was in the tent except for a pile of axes and armor.

Chief Stoick was sitting on the edge of the cot. He looked at the two girls sharply.

Heather and Astrid stopped and bowed. "Chief Stoick."

"Aye, lasses." Stoick sounded tired and disgruntled. "What can I do for you two?"

"Um, we've had a little problem," Astrid said, looking at Heather. "You may have already heard about it from Chief Mogadon or Thuggory. It's about Heather."

Stoick looked up. "Heather?"

"Yeah." Astrid twisted her fingers around her axe handle nervously. "You see, Heather fought as a mercenary for a year leading up to this. She – um, well, in short, she fought for the Outcasts in the Meathead/Outcast war."

Stoick gazed steadily at Heather. "You did?"

"I did, Chief." Heather met Stoick's gaze. "I'm not proud of it, but what's done is done. I needed the money and I wanted the experience. The only problem is now the Meatheads hate me. Thuggory said he'd have me arrested if I returned, and was going to talk to his father about it. That's why I thought you might have heard of the issue."

"Thuggory came to the Chief's meeting this morning with his father," Stoick said. "Neither of them mentioned you."

Heather breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank Thor."

"Look, Chief," Astrid said. "I have something to ask. I just wanted to make sure -"

"You don't have to 'Chief' me, lass." Stoick looked up out of his sad eyes. "Stoick is good enough from you to me."

Astrid nodded. "All right, Chief – Stoick."

Stoick smiled sadly. "I was hoping there was to be a time when you would call me 'Dad,'" he said. "Alas, things are not always as we hope them to be."

Astrid swallowed, a lump coming to her throat. "I hoped I would too."

Stoick nodded. "Hiccup should never have been stolen from us. He was – he was special. He wasn't a Viking like us, but he was something more."

Astrid blinked back tears. "I know. He was truly the best person I've ever known."

Stoick swallowed. "I'm sorry. What did you want to ask me?"

"Oh." Astrid turned to Heather. "We just want to be sure that Heather will not be arrested or executed or anything because of what she did a year ago. Can you protect her? She's a good warrior, and she fought bravely for us, for Hiccup. Let her keep fighting, Stoick."

Stoick the Vast gazed up at Heather. He stared at her for a second, then nodded. "Very well. I won't allow you to suffer punishment for your crimes against Mogadon's tribe, as long as you swear your loyalty to Berk, here and now."

Heather looked at Astrid, then back at Stoick.

"I need your solemn vow as a Viking that you will not betray us, oppose us, and that you will obey my commands. I know that you are from a different tribe, but if I order you to fight for me, you have to come and obey whenever I call."

Heather nodded slowly. "I have to swear fealty to Berk – to you, and all the chiefs to come?"

Stoick nodded. "Yes, girl. It is the only way I can protect you in the name of Viking law."

Heather nodded. "Very well."

With a ring, she drew her curved sword and held it aloft for a second, the reflection of the fire flickering off the steel. Her eyes ran up and down the blade, and as they did so her expression changed. Astrid stared as Heather's look turned from a serious, collected gaze to a savage, bitter, and downright evil countenance. Her eyes met Stoick's, and her sword came down. Astrid thought for a brief second that she was going to slice off Stoick's head, but then the sword came all the way to the ground.

Heather knelt, placing the tip of her unbreakable sword in the bearskin rug at her feet.

"I, Heather, hereby pledge my life and service to Stoick the Vast of Berk, and to all chiefs of Berk to come. My sword is yours, my life is yours. On my honor as a Viking."

Stoick rose and placed an enormous hand on Heather's shoulder.

"It is done. Rise, vassal of Berk."

Heather rose, and sheathed her blade. "It's an honor, Chief Stoick," she said. "I can't thank you enough."

Stoick smiled slightly. "It is an honor to have you as a warrior of my tribe," he said. "Hiccup would have been pleased."

Heather smiled.

"You must stay and have some ale with me," Stoick said. "It's tradition for a newly sworn member of the tribe to drink with the chief."

Heather laughed. "All right, then! I can drink! But not too much, we have a battle to fight tomorrow."

"That's right!" Stoick looked fierce. "It's time the Bog Burglars paid for what they did to me, to my tribe, to my son. There is ale in that barrel behind you, Heather. Let us drink to victory. Astrid, lass, will you join us?"

"I actually can't," Astrid confessed. "I have to go and talk to Ruffnut."

Stoick pointed a finger. "Make sure that blonde-haired fool doesn't do anything stupid tomorrow," he said. "But her brother is riding with Thuggory, and Thuggory does NOT allow stupidity, trust me."

"Well I'll tell her you said that," Astrid joked. "Goodbye, Stoick. I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodbye, lass."

With a final look, Astrid left the tent, even as Stoick and Heather sat at the table with two mugs of Viking beer.

Moving hurriedly and resolutely, Astrid approached the green tent that the twins housed in. and shoved the flap open, not bothering to knock.

"Hey!" Tuffnut Thorston looked up from his cot as Astrid walked in. "What are you doing in here, Astrid? I was about to get undressed."

Astrid looked at the male twin, bemused. Tuffnut still looked like a ghoul. His face was battered from the thrashing Snotlout had given him two days previous, and he was not a pretty sight.

"Oh, stop whining, Tuff," Astrid reprimanded. She turned to the other cot, where Ruffnut was sitting, combing her hair. "In fact, Thuggory wants to see you, Tuff. Now. In his tent."

"What!?" Tuffnut leapt out of bed. "I wonder what he has to say to me. OK, in his tent, you say? I'm outta here, be back soon, Ruff."

And he was gone.

Astrid stared after him. "Never in my life have I ever seen Tuff obey someone so fast," she said in surprise.

"It's Thuggory," Ruffnut said, lifting up a band to wrap up her ponytails. "Ever since Tuff met him he's been like a devoted slave. But who can blame him, I mean," Ruffnut sighed, "Thuggory is SOOO hot."

"Oh, bosh, Ruff," Astrid said, and sat down by her friend on the cot. "And I know you want to ride next to him and all, so you're not going to like what I'm about to say."

"Uh-oh," Ruffnut said nervously. "Astrid?"

"You and I are going to switch places for the battle tomorrow," Astrid stated. "I'm going to dress up as you and you are going to dress up as me. You will ride Stormfly at the back of the army and I will ride with Tuffnut on Barf at the front of the battle."

"What!?" Ruffnut exclaimed. "What? Astrid, I – I – why?"

"Because Fishlegs isn't letting me fight in the front lines tomorrow." Astrid leaned forward and put a firm hand on Ruffnut's shoulder. "Look, Ruff. I want to kill Camicazi. I'm GOING to kill Camicazi. She killed Hiccup, and need to pay her back for it. I can't do that unless I'm in the front of the battle, and Fishlegs isn't letting me do that. So I need to dress up as you so that I can."

"But I want to fight," Ruffnut protested. "And I'm riding with Thuggory! You can't just steal me away from the cutest boy in the archipelago."

Astrid laughed. "Oh, so THAT'S why you want to be in the front!" She chuckled. "All right, I think I'm doing YOU a favor now. You'll probably get killed in the front lines. The Bog will be expecting us and they'll be sending arrows flying at you. You're not an experienced warrior, Ruff. You'll probably die."

"I don't care," Ruffnut said stubbornly. "I want to do it. Tuff and I are a team. We fight together. You can't come and disrupt our setup, Astrid. I don't want to switch places with you."

"Come on, Ruff," Astrid coaxed, leaning in closer. "Come on, girl. Wouldn't you like to dress up as the great Astrid Hofferson for just one day? You could wear my blue shirt, my armor, my spiked skirt. You can have all the boys after you – come on Ruffnut, you know you want to."

Ruffnut looked agonized. "I – I really wish I could," she admitted. "Gods, that would be fun, I could get into all sorts of trouble and it'd get blamed on you! But Astrid, I've got to fight with Tuff and Thuggory – oh, he's such a dream. I can't let you."

"Oh, you're GOING to let me," Astrid said threateningly, taking her hand off Ruffnut's shoulder. "And here's why."

"Umm, why?" Ruffnut asked, getting the impression that Astrid was about to do something terrible.

Astrid grinned an evil grin, and leaned in to whisper at Ruffnut. "I know who burned down the Jorgenson's barn two weeks ago."

Ruffnut's eyes grew wide. "NO!" She said. "Astrid, NO! I – I – that wasn't me, that was Tuffnut!"

"Oh, I saw you, I KNOW it was you," Astrid crowed triumphantly. "Both Spitelout Jorgenson AND Stoick have wanted to get a hold of the scoundrel who did that. They both suspect you, and when I tell them I saw you do it, they will be SOOO mad."

"Astrid, don't tell them!" Ruffnut pleaded. "Don't do it!"

"Well, I won't," Astrid said. "As long as you and I exchange places tomorrow."

"Thor DAMN it, Astrid," Ruffnut groaned. "Damn you."

"I need to do it, Ruff," Astrid said stolidly. "Nothing will ever stop me from killing Camicazi, and right now you're stopping me. I'm going right through you."

"I hate you," Ruffnut sighed. "You know what, I bet you just want to sit alongside Thuggory yourself."

"I do not!" Astrid cried indignantly. "I told you why I want to."

"Thuggory likes you," Ruffnut said. "I can tell."

"Well, I don't care," Astrid said, although she faltered slightly. "I just want to take your place tomorrow, and if you don't let me, I'll tell the chief and Spitelout that you burned down his barn. Simple as that."

"Uggh, fine, you blackmailer," Ruffnut huffed. "But I should get a little bit more out of this than just all the boys nagging at my heels and getting stuff blamed on you. Do I get to carry your axe?"

Astrid looked up. "No!" she said. "I can't fight without my axe. I need it."

"Uggh," Ruffnut said. "I really want that axe."

"Well, you can't have it," Astrid said. "And one more thing. You can't tell ANYONE that we're going to trade places tomorrow. NO ONE! Not your parents, not Tuffnut, not anybody. You can tell Barf, though. If you don't he'll probably toss me off as soon as I get on him."

Ruffnut laughed. "Don't worry about that," she said. "If everyone knows I'm just dressed as you it'll be no fun for me! And sure, I'll tell Barf, but make sure you tell Stormfly too! I don't want a spike in my butt for sitting on the wrong dragon."

Astrid grinned. "All right. So do we have a deal?"

Ruffnut sighed. "Yes, under duress, but we have a deal." She spat in her hand and held it out. "But you've got to do that nasty handshake."

"Oh, I JUST had to do this with Bashie," Astrid sighed. But she spat in her own hand and ratified the deal by pumping Ruffnut's hand. "OW!" She shouted, and jerked away. In her hand was a pin.

"Ha haha!" Ruffnut laughed. "Got a pin stuck in your hand, Astrid? Oh, I'm so sorry." She cackled again. "Consider that payback!"

"I hate you, Ruff," Astrid growled, plucking the pin from her hand. "If you weren't doing me a favor I'd thrash you."

"This is why I can tolerate doing people favors once in a while," Ruffnut laughed.

"Meet me at my tent early tomorrow morning," Astrid ordered, flinging the pin to the dirt. "We'll switch clothes and dragons. Then it's fun, and then it's war."

"Which is also fun," Ruffnut grinned.

Astrid grinned back.

"Which is also fun."

High Asgard, Day 14 since Hiccup's Departure

Pain. Searing pain.

Hiccup was in a dark and terrible dream. The feel of hot metal, the bubbling of liquid Dragon Iron, and the sickening smell of burning flesh, his OWN flesh, was all around him. And the constant repetition of a seemingly endless query:

"Where is the Sword of Death!?"

Hiccup was on his back on the stone slab. Chains hung from the ceiling of the torture cell, connecting to his biceps and wrists. Hiccup stared in horror. His arms were gone. There was no flesh on his forearms at all. From his elbows down everything had been stripped away, skin, tendons, and muscle. All that remained was his bones, and his skeleton hands and forearms were held in iron vises that were mounted in the stone.

Small, short, sturdy people with beards were all around him, shouting and yelling in Old Norse. With hammers and drills, they were working on Hiccup's hands and forearms, boring holes in his bones with awls and drills.

Then a command was barked, and the short dwarves all nodded, ceasing their operation. Standing tall and terrible over Hiccup was Asgeirr, and he wore a mask of iron spikes over his mouth. In his hand he held a pitcher with a small spout, and it steamed with a heat so overwhelming that it had burned off the flesh of Asgeirr's hand. Hiccup finally understood what was happening.

Asgeirr stepped up to Hiccup's arms, and raising the pitcher, began to pour into holes in Hiccup's fingers, hands, and forearms. Hiccup yelled in horror as his white, smooth bones suddenly changed color. They were transformed from clean tinted white to the distinctive dark silver of dragon iron. He had iron arms.

Hiccup awoke with a jolt, and found himself no longer in the torture chambers. He was back in his familiar room, with the soft white bedding and red walls.

Hiccup took several deep breaths, his eyes roving. He could see. His eyes had been regrown. They had been burned away in the first few minutes of his test.

He had passed.

Hiccup closed his eyes and relaxed in utter relief as he recalled all that Eclipse had done to him, all the horrific mutilations he had underwent. He re remembered the question, repeated a hundred times. Never once had he answered it.

He had passed.

With that, Hiccup fell once more to sleep, but this time his dreams were happy and not haunted by pain and death.

Hiccup then felt something that was more horrible to him than any torture. There was a soft clink, and then something tugged around his neck, and then a chain broke and came away. Astrid's precious Nadder scale!

Hiccup awoke with a yell, and saw the beloved Nadder scale being lifted from his neck.

With a cry of rage, Hiccup jerked his arms forward. They were chained to something, but he found power in his arms that he had not possessed before, and the chains broke. Instinctively he reached for Hicca on his back, and the sword was there. Drawing it with a terrible cry of anger, he leapt from the bed and spun on the person who had taken the Nadder scale.

The person who was standing in front of him was not anyone fearful like Asgeirr or a God. It was Aiah.

Hiccup pointed Hicca at the small girl, and she took a scared step backward, lifting the Nadder scale in front of her face. Her eyes suddenly blazed so brightly with purple light that the entire room was lit with the radiance. She spoke.

"I can send a message back to Astrid through this scale. You have ten seconds to speak a message to her, Kappi. It beginsnow. Speak!"

Hiccup stared down the blade of Hicca at the Nadder scale. The dazzling purple light was reflecting off the smooth steel, and the face of Astrid carved into the blue surface of the Nadder scale seemed to turn and look at him. Astrid's eyes opened.

"Speak!" Aiah cried. "Your time wanes."

Gasping, Hiccup found his voice.

"Astrid," he whispered. "Astrid! Listen, Milady. I'm not dead! I'm NOT! I'm with the Gods." The light began to fade, signaling that his time was running out. He hastily went on. "Astrid, I love you. I will see you again."

Hiccup started to go on, but suddenly a great gust of wind rushed into the room. Aiah's shining white dress billowed in the breeze, and she shouted in a beautiful and powerful voice.

A great flash of purple light exploded, and a resounding boom shook the room, hurling Hiccup backwards. Hicca was torn out of Hiccup's hands and was hurled against the wall. The Nadder scale flashed blue, and then vanished from Aiah's hand completely. The room became still again.

Hiccup had been blasted onto his back, flat on the floor. His face felt seared as if by a great heat, but he was unharmed.

With a groan, he rolled over and pushed himself up. He gasped as he did so, for his arms were so strong that he nearly pushed himself up off the floor. Amazed, he got to his feet and saw Aiah. She appeared completely unaffected by the blast, and stood facing him, her purple eyes rounded in fear.

"I'm sorry, Kappi," she whispered. "I didn't mean to wake you up, I just wanted to take your Nadder scale. I was going to let you use it to send a message later, but when you woke I had to do it then. I'm so sorry."

Aiah bent down and picked up Hicca off the floor, the bright steel blade balanced against her palm. She offered it to Hiccup, who was still blinking slowly.

"I'm sorry," Aiah said again, casting her eyes down.

Hiccup reached out and took up his sword from Aiah's hands. "Don't be sorry," he said, sheathing the blade on his back. "I was – having a bad dream."

Aiah looked back up at him. "But I failed," she said sadly. "I made a spell that allowed that message to be sent, but it wasn't complete yet. I needed the scale to complete it. That message was recorded and the scale has been sent back to Midgard, but not directly to Astrid. It'll be sent back to the spot from which you were taken."

Hiccup nodded. "I see. But thank you all the same, I didn't think any message would be sent at all, at least I now have a chance."

Aiah smiled.

Hiccup looked down at his hands, at his body. He was scantily clad, for he only wore black leggings and his sword buckle. His chest was completely bare, and caked with dried blood. He touched it gingerly.

"What did they do to me, Aiah?" He whispered. "They – they tortured me. They asked me questions, they did terrible things to me."

"It was the test," Aiah told him, putting a soothing hand on his arm. "They needed to know if you would break under torture. You did not. You passed."

"My arms," Hiccup whispered. "Aiah, what did they do to my arms!"

Aiah smiled. "They remade them," she said. "They did it with the other two riders they trained, but only gave them hands. They tried a new method on you and it worked. Your forearms and hand bones are not bones anymore. They're made of metal. Dragon Iron, the hardest metal ever. Unbreakable. You can block swords with those arms."

Hiccup gulped, and then rapped his knuckles together. Sure enough, instead of a dull thud, there was a clank of metal under the skin.

"I don't believe it," he muttered. "It's not natural."

Aiah laughed, her sweet voice echoing in Hiccup's room. "Of course it isn't natural," she said. "But it's made you better. Metal arms. It's lighter and stronger than bone. Your hands and arms will move faster now."

Hiccup smiled. "Metal arms and hands." Lowering them, he looked at Aiah again. "Why wouldn't you see me yesterday, Aiah?" he asked. "I looked for you."

Aiah nodded. "I am sorry, Kappi, but I was working on that spell that could send you a message, and I could not break my concentration."

"Oh, good," Hiccup said, sitting down on his bed. "I thought for some reason you just didn't want to see me anymore."

"Oh, no!" Aiah smiled. "You can come to see me whenever you desire."

"Great," Hiccup smiled. Then he glanced around. "I'm a bloody, gory mess. I just got tortured to death. I should clean up. It doesn't seem right that you, in that pure, shining white dress, should be talking to me without a shirt and covered in blood."

"It does not bother me," Aiah laughed. "But yes, you should clean up!" She clapped her hands. "It's Thor's day of birth. There's a big party. You're supposed to attend!"

"Right!" Hiccup laughed. "Thor invited me personally. I should go bath and get changed. Some celebration is needed after that experience I just had."

Hiccup rose to his feet, and as he did so, the door opened. Asgeirr walked in.

Hiccup's pleasant, happy countenance immediately shifted when he saw Asgeirr, and Asgeirr's face also changed when he saw Aiah. Aiah looked up at him coolly, and Asgeirr seemed shaken.

"Out," he said to her unceremoniously.

"As you wish," Aiah said, and glided past him and out the door. It closed behind her with a click.

Asgeirr looked up at Hiccup. Hiccup looked back at him, and for a second the two stared at each other. Then Asgeirr stepped forward and presented his hand.

"Congratulations," he said. "You have passed the first Level of my training, in a record time. A remarkable achievement."

Hiccup looked at Asgeirr's extended hand and then back at Asgeirr. He did not move to take it.

"I know," Asgeirr said. "I just tortured you to death. I have abused you and battered you, and made you subject to my will. I have changed you and hallowed you, and you feel no sense of victory after passing this Level. But I have no wish to cause you pain or harm, as much as I actually do. It is my task, what I am assigned by the Gods to do. I am doing it to the best of my abilities, and you are not supposed to like me. I understand."

He kept his hand outstretched, and Hiccup slowly reached out to grab it. The two shook firmly.

"From this day on," Asgeirr said, "I am no longer your tormentor. The first stage, the stage where I break you down, is over. Now I build you back up. I am here as a mentor, a trainer, a real Master."

Hiccup nodded. "Master."

Asgeirr smiled.

"So when do I get to see Toothless!?" Hiccup shouted exultingly, suddenly remembering. "You said when I passed this test I could see him! I want to, right now!"

Asgeirr laughed. "You shall see him today, but he's not here yet. He's still being transferred from Alfheim, and coming with him is Alfheim's Captain Kaldr and his dragon Brenakir. They will be your principal trainers from now on."

"Kaldr will be training me?" Hiccup asked, awed.

"Yes, the elf Kaldr." Asgeirr grinned. "My old student. He knows more about dragon riding and dragonback fighting than anyone else in the nine realms except perhaps – Zyon."

Hiccup nodded. "I see."

"But," Asgeirr chuckled, "While you are waiting for Toothless to arrive, you can go get cleaned up. You have a birthday party to attend, and you're already late."

"This is a sexy looking outfit," Hiccup grinned, looking down at himself and plowing his hair to the side. "Almost makes me want to break my rule and look in the mirror."

Ever since Asgeirr left him, Hiccup had taken a hot bath, eaten, trimmed his nails, and shaved. Then he had dressed in a fine red and black tunic, with no burdensome armor or thick leather. It fit perfectly and Hiccup had no doubt he looked fancier than he ever had in his life before. The only thing out of place was Hicca, which was buckled securely across his back as usual.

With a last grin at the magnificent garb, Hiccup opened the door to his room and walked out, a smile on his face and a hop in his step. For the first time in a long time he felt good. Aiah had sent a message for him, which was the best he could do, he had defied the Asgardian Council, he had passed his first test, he was going to see Toothless again, and now he was going to attend a party.

With a final check of his overall appearance, he opened the door of his room and strode out.

Swinging down the halls cheerfully, he followed the directions Asgeirr gave him and made the turns through the fancy palace of Asgard to a fine hallway that was decorated by banners and flags. This was the entry to the party. Walking briskly up the door at the end, he was stopped by a pleasant, smiling doorman, and Hiccup was astonished at how polite he was. No one had ever been so polite on Asgard.

"And who might you be?" The doorman asked, with a gracious bow.

"I'm Hiccup, the new Rider," Hiccup grinned. "Thor invited me to his party. It's in here, right?"

"Ah, Riddari Hiccup!" The doorman bowed respectfully. "Yes, you are invited! Thor has even asked about you. Go right on in."

"Thank you." The doorman opened the door for Hiccup and he swung into a large room. Stopping, he took in the room.

It was a banner show. The entire large hall was decorated fully, with golden banners and statues all over. Music was playing, a large dance was going on in the middle of the floor, and relaxing seats were on the sides. All kinds of amusements were all over, and there was even a fighting ring in one corner. At the head of the hall was a long, unbelievably huge dining table, which was now in the after-meal process. People were sitting around it, drinking and laughing, and the God Odin himself sat at the head, with his wife Frigga beside him. Hiccup had seen them in the Council, but they looked much more pleasant and relaxed in their current environment.

"My lord," someone said, and Hiccup turned to see a small, smiling man next to him.

"Welcome to the party," the man said. "I am here to announce your arrival, you are the last guest to arrive. What is your name and title?"

"I – I have no real title," Hiccup stammered. "My name is Hiccup Haddock, Riddari of Midgard."

"Hiccup," the man smiled. "So you're the new rider. Very well." Stepping forward, he raised a device to his mouth and spoke, his voice echoing through the device across the entire hall.

"Lords and Ladies, may I present to you the Riddari of Midgard and Captain of Asgard in training, Lord Hiccup Haddock!"

The entire hall stopped and turned to look at Hiccup. The dancing stopped, the musicians stopped playing, and the whole of the party stood still to stare at him. Hiccup was surprised, but took the attention with a grin.

"Hiccup!" Thor rose from a great couch in the center of the room, where he was surrounded by ladies and food and drink. "Welcome! Come in and enjoy the festivities!"

Grinning, Hiccup waved at Thor and strode into the room. The crowds parted for him, and he walked down the sea of people, who stood pointing at him and whispering. Hiccup's grin only got wider as he went on. Girls were hiding behind their fans and making eyes at him. Men were staring in wonder and respect.

"Hiccup, my friend!" Thor called from his seat on a large half-circled couch. "Welcome, again!"

"Thor," Hiccup grinned, walking up to the big God and grasping his hand. 'It's good to be here."

The dancing had resumed and the music started up again, and the buzz of activity resumed.

"Good to have you!" Thor was jovial, smiling from ear to ear. "Come and sit with me, get some food and ale."

"Right on," Hiccup answered, and Thor threw a big arm over his shoulder, leading him to the massive red lounge that he had been sitting on. It was the most luxurious thing Hiccup had ever seen for sitting on.

"Take a seat," Thor laughed, dropping down to his spot between two beautiful, scantily-clad women. "There's good company here."

"Uhh," Hiccup stammered, as one of the women pulled him down onto the couch next to her. "OK."

Hiccup blinked as the young, attractive woman slid her arms around him, one in front and one behind, laying her head on his shoulder. Another smiling serving girl handed him a goblet of wine, even as another woman sat down on his opposite side. Her dress was revealing and very engaging.

"How are you, Riddari Hiccup?" the first woman smiled at him, reaching her hand up to his head and touching his smoothed brown hair. "You look dashing."

"Dashing and handsome," the second laughed, sliding a hand over Hiccup's chest. "I like your hair, too."

"I could sleep on this arm all night," the first whispered seductively as she snuggled tighter into his shoulder. "So gentle and strong."

Hiccup was both shocked and amused at the same time. He tried to set his goblet of wine down, but one of the women took it from him and set it down for him.

"Not thirsty, are we?" She asked. "Neither am I. I'd like some other kind of amusement, what about you?"

Hiccup found his voice. "Look," he said. "I have no idea -"

"I like that braid in your hair, my lord," the second commented, sliding one of her well-shaped legs over Hiccup's thigh and reaching up to touch it.

"Don't touch that braid," Hiccup said, brushing her arm away and awkwardly trying to get her leg off of him.

"Oh, it's too personal to touch," the first giggled, sliding her hand down from his chest to his stomach and still lower.

"Hey, hold on a minute," Hiccup began, but the second spoke again.

"Can I hold your sword?" She asked, with a wink, reaching up to Hicca and wrapping her fingers around the hilt.

That did it. Hiccup was snapped out of his awkward, confused state.

"Don't touch my sword!" he shouted, leaping off the couch, almost knocking both of the women over. He spun and looked down at them, both of them wide-eyed in shock.

"No one touches this sword but me," Hiccup said sternly. "And I'd prefer if you didn't touch me at all."

His outburst had collected a sizeable audience, and now many people were looking in Hiccup's direction. The two women seemed thoroughly embarrassed, and Hiccup was too.

As he was about to speak again, he felt a soft, soothing touch on his shoulder. Turning, he was dazzled by the beauty of the Goddess Eir. Her shining, adorable blue eyes met his for a brief second before turning to the two women who were still staring. Eir was wearing a stunning pink dress which clasped over her shoulders with golden circlets, leaving her arms bare.

She spoke to the women. "Hiccup is not yet accustomed to the ways of the Aesir," she smiled. "Forgive him."

Without waiting for a reply she turned and slid her smooth arm through Hiccup's, leading him away. Hiccup was still gaping. Never in his life had he ever seen someone so beautiful as the Goddess Eir, and here she was, leading him down to a private alcove, where a couch and a table sat.

"Sit with me, Riddari," she smiled, gesturing to the pink divan.

Slowly, Hiccup sat, and Eir, still with a smile on her face, sat next to him. The divan matched her dress perfectly, and the small golden bracelet on her wrist danced as she beckoned to a server to bring some refreshments.

"Uh, thanks for rescuing me from that," Hiccup chuckled, rubbing his knees awkwardly. "I guess I have a lot to learn about being a – a hero."

Eir laughed, a sound which made Hiccup's heart beat faster. "No," she explained. "Although all the important people get treated as such, it is just Thor's style, he took you up to his personal contingent of – of admirers. Thor is a wonderful, pleasant person, but his one fault is too many women."

"Is there such a thing?" Hiccup laughed, and Eir opened her mouth in indignation.

"I thought you didn't like it!" She rapped him on the head playfully.

"Ow," Hiccup muttered, rubbing his head. "And no, I was just joking."

"Did you just say 'ow'?" Eir mocked. "You were just tortured to death yesterday, and THAT little tap hurt you? I'm disappointed in you."

"I was being polite," Hiccup smiled. "It'd be interesting to see how much you could hit me before I felt any pain. Strength isn't one of your qualities, Eir."

"Hey." Eir slapped at him, and Hiccup snapped his hand up to catch her wrist.

"Ow!" Eir looked at her hand, in Hiccup's solid grip. "Your hands! They're made of metal!"

Hiccup laughed. "Sorry. Now it's your turn to say ow. Don't slap me next time."

Eir scowled, and Hiccup, laughing, let her wrist go. She rubbed it.

"You're mean, Hiccup."

Hiccup leaned back with a yawn. "If there's one thing I've learned so far, it's that you have to be mean to survive around here."

"Oh, so not true," Eir argued, leaning her chin on her hand. "You don't have to be mean. I'm not mean."

"Really?" Hiccup teased. "Bashing me brutally on the head like you did a few minutes ago? That's abusive."

"You provoked me." Eir scowled again, rubbing her wrist pointedly.

"What I meant," Hiccup said, "was to survive my training I have to be mean. If I wasn't, I might be off fighting the – The Wolf right now instead of sitting here, talking with a beautiful Goddess."

"What did you call me?" Eir smiled at him, and Hiccup began to open his mouth awkwardly when the serving girl came to the rescue. With a smile she placed a tray of some small food and fruit juice on the table for them. Bowing, she left, and Hiccup changed the subject.

"All this food," he said, looking at the tray. "There's nothing like this back where I came from."

"If I recall correctly, you have a rather austere background," Eir commented, reaching out to pick a slice of cheese from the platter.

"Yep." Hiccup picked up his goblet and sipped the juice. It was sweet and cool. "It was a rough but fun life."

"What was it like down there?" Eir asked. "How were the people?"

"Nice enough." Hiccup hesitated.

"Nice enough?" Eir raised a golden eyebrow, taking another dainty bite of cheese. "I can read you like a book, Hiccup. You weren't treated too well, were you?"

Hiccup sighed, setting his goblet down. "At first, no," he admitted. "I was the heir to the tribe, but I was – a loser. I wasn't a real Viking, I'm still not. I was small, skinny, didn't like killing and bashing things."

Hiccup paused, and Eir nodded. "Go on, Hiccup."

"I just wanted to fit in," Hiccup said quietly. "But I never could. The boys jeered me, the girls laughed at me, and the men shoved me aside. I was never a real Viking."

Eir frowned. "Then how did they grow to like you?"

"I – I opened their eyes." Hiccup leaned back. "I was finally able to get past the Viking stubbornness when I used the dragons to beat the Red Death. Then they saw that dragons were good, and we could live together. Then I became a hero. I had the respect of the men, the boys admired me, and the girls loved me."

Hiccup grinned wryly.

"Do you have a special girl waiting for you back home?" Eir asked softly, with a tinge of sadness.

Hiccup looked up. "I do. At least – I hope I do."

"You love her?" Eir asked.

"I love her," Hiccup said slowly. "At least – I thought I did. I was going to propose to her soon, but I was taken first."

"Think?" Eir was not smiling, but was very sincere. "You don't THINK you love someone. Do you love her? Does she love you back?"

"I – I don't know," Hiccup stammered. "Look, coming here to Asgard opened my eyes, and I can see things from a different prospective. Maybe Astrid just wanted me because I was the heir, because I was cool. Astrid loves being in control. She loves fighting, leading, winning. She's a real Viking, glory is one of her passions. If she were to marry someone, it'd be a chief, a powerful chief whom she could achieve her dreams with. And that's me. So I'm nervous. What if she doesn't truly love me?"

Hiccup stopped, and then glanced down.

Eir nodded. "I understand. Be careful who you love, Hiccup. And also be patient. Don't fall for the first girl that kisses you. Wait until you understand yourself, who you are, and who you are going to be."

Hiccup met Eir's gaze. "I'm going to become more powerful than any man, woman, and child on Midgard," he stated.

Eir reached out and took his hand, and Hiccup thought she shivered.

"You are going to become like a God," she told him, squeezing his hand. "Find a good match for a God."

She let his hand go, and smiled at him.

Hiccup grinned back. "So, what about you?" He asked cheekily. "How many handsome, sculpted young Gods do you have at your heels?"

Eir opened her mouth defensively but then smiled.

"I have none that I really like. I don't want anyone tagging at my heels. Why would that ever matter to you?"

"It – it doesn't," Hiccup stammered. "I mean, I'm just teasing you."

"Teasing a Goddess?" Eir winked at him. "That seems brazen of you."

"I'm bold sometimes." Hiccup grinned, looking out to the dance floor. "I'm feeling especially bold right now." He got up and offered his hand to Eir. "Dance with me?"

Eir smiled up at him. "I'd love to," she said, and took Hiccup's hand, rising. She linked her arm through his and Hiccup, feeling like the most important person in the nine realms, led her to the dance floor. Suddenly Hiccup stopped short.

"Wait," he laughed. "What am I doing?" He turned to look at Eir. "Sorry, but I - I don't know how to dance."

Eir laughed. "I'll teach you how. It's easy."

"Sorry," Hiccup laughed, as Eir pulled him into the sea of dancers. "As a one-legged Viking I never had the opportunity to try this."

"You aren't one legged anymore," Eir reminded him, as she slid her arm over Hiccup's. "Here. One hand in mine, one hand here." She slid his hand down to her waist. She looked up at him, her eyes dancing. "And just go with the music!"

Laughing, she spun Hiccup into the beat.

Hiccup had never had so much fun. Eir's touch was mesmerizing, her deep azure eyes were enthralling, and the golden beauty and charm she possessed made Hiccup lose all sense of time and the harsh world around him. The brutality of his training, memories of The Wolf, and his recent torture melted away. He was dancing with Eir, and that was all that mattered.

At several points in the dancing the music changed to a slow, caressing pitch, and when that happened Eir would drape both her arms over his shoulders and they would dance slowly together. Hiccup never wanted to leave.

It was during one of these moments that someone tapped him on the shoulder. Hiccup broke his deep gaze with Eir to look with annoyance at the interruption. It was Thor.

"You," Hiccup laughed, stopping the dance with Eir and standing beside her, his hand on her waist. "What do you want, Thor?"

"I want your partner," Thor laughed. "Come, Eir, why don't you ever dance with me? Please do me the honor."

Eir laughed. "Thor, you never have a problem finding anyone to dance with you."

"True," Thor admitted, "But not one so beautiful. You refuse to dance with me every time I ask and now as soon as Hiccup arrives you swoop in like a hawk."

"Nonsense, Thor," Eir chided. "Maybe I only dance with the best."

"I am the best!" Thor laughed. "Hiccup, do you think you are better than me?"

Hiccup grinned. "I think we'd better let the Goddess determine that."

"Oh, come off of it," Thor grinned. He looked at Hiccup. "Actually, forget dancing, Hiccup, and I wasn't about to steal your lovely companion. I just want to talk toyou. May I have a minute?"

Hiccup looked at Eir. "Sure," he said, and the three walked out of the massive group of dancers till they reached the outside. Then Hiccup turned to the golden-haired Goddess. "All right, Eir, I'll be back in a minute."

Eir pouted. "I'll be lonely without you. I feel like dancing."

"Well, I have to go talk to this clown," Hiccup said. "I'll be back, Goldie." With a grin, he kissed Eir on the cheek and gestured to Thor. "Let's go."

Thor and Hiccup walked off away from the dancers, and Thor, looking back at Eir as they left, whistled.

"I didn't know you were on such good terms with that beauty," he marveled. "I salute you, Hiccup, my man!"

Hiccup grinned sheepishly. "She likes me."

"No shit," Thor laughed. "I don't know what's gotten into her. She's always been jolly and silly and childish, but she's never taken to anyone like she has now. Capitalize, my friend!"

Hiccup grimaced. "You know, I told you about my girlfriend," he said.

Thor laughed. "You've got the most beautiful – a Goddess – breathing on your lips and you're not willing to ditch what's her name… Astrid?"

"I – I don't know," Hiccup faltered. "I've learned a lot about myself and I've changed since I came up here, but I'm not sure – I don't know if I love her or if she loves me. Anyway. Did you call me aside to tell me to get after Eir, or was there something else?"

Thor laughed. "Right. Girls always distract me from everything. So, in the Council meeting yesterday, when you insulted my father, he turned to me and asked me if I could thrash you. I was about to answer but then realized I wasn't sure if I even could. Obviously, against me and my hammer Mjolnir you would have no chance, but with fists -" Thor smiled. "I'd like to fight you in the boxing ring."

Hiccup blinked slowly. "Thor. Are you serious? I didn't come here to fight, I came to have fun."

"It will be fun!" Thor gestured to the boxing ring in the corner. "We'll have a civilized contest. Just fists. It's entertainment."

"Not my type," Hiccup argued. He turned back to look at Eir, who was standing waiting for him.

"It's tradition for me to fistfight someone on my birthday," Thor explained. "I pick the one who I think will be a challenge and take them on. And," he added, "I usually win."

Hiccup looked up at the golden-eyed God. "Are you taunting me?"

"Yes," Thor laughed.

Hiccup shook his head, laughing with his giant friend. "All right, I can't believe I'm doing this," he said. "But Thor, I accept your challenge. I'll box you."

"Yes!" Thor shouted, and with a grin, pounded Hiccup on the shoulder. "This will be fun!"

"Fun?" Hiccup sighed. "I don't savor the idea of getting one of your fists in my face."

"Oh, we'll wrap our hands up so we won't break any noses," Thor assured him. "And we won't fight to a knockout, either. Just until one is down for eight seconds. That way things won't get out of hand."

"If you say so," Hiccup chuckled. "So when does the contest start?"

"How about right now? No better time than the present," Thor answered.

Hiccup winced. "I guess getting it over with is a good policy."

"You don't seem excited," Thor frowned.

"I'm not, really," Hiccup admitted. "I mean, I fight more than enough these days. I don't stand to gain anything from this."

"Ah." Thor grinned. "So shall we make a little bet?"

Hiccup laughed. "Thor, you're just crazy."

"Am I?" Thor smirked cheekily. "All right, Hiccup, let's throw a little motivation on the table. Here's the challenge. Whoever wins this fight has to go straight over to the Goddess Eir and kiss her. No backing out."

Hiccup laughed loud and long. "This sounds like motivation for you, Thor, not me!" he laughed. "I don't need to win a fight to have the right to kiss Eir."

Thor smiled. "Well if she slaps you for it you can say it was part of the challenge," he laughed. "Come on, Hiccup, you know you want to win now."

"All right, you've hooked me," Hiccup admitted ruefully.

"Good!" Thor pumped his fist. "Now I get to kick your ass and kiss Eir! It's like it's my birthday twice in one day."

"Crowing a little early, I'd say," Hiccup quipped.

"Oh, do you really think you can beat me? Thor asked.

"We'll just have to find out," Hiccup grinned.

"That's the spirit!" Thor clapped Hiccup on the back. "All right, we are ON! I'm going to announce this right now. This will be the event of the day. Meet me over at the ring!"

Hiccup saluted, and Thor pushed his way through the crowd and up to the dais upon which his father and mother sat. Hiccup turned and walked towards Eir, who had a look of askance on her face.

"What was all that about?" She asked.

Hiccup sighed and gestured to the dais. Eir turned her gaze to the platform, and both Goddess and Dragon rider saw Thor jump up to the table enthusiastically.

"Oh dear," Eir said.

"People of Asgard!" Thor raised his voice, picking up his hammer Mjolnir and pounding the table with it. "I have an announcement!"

Everything stopped, the music, the dancers, all the games, and everything. When Thor spoke to a crowd, everyone listened.

Thor waited until he had the full attention of his guests. The big God, now having everyone's interest aroused, smiled his charming smile and went on.

"As you all know, it is tradition for me to battle someone in the ring to celebrate my birthday! I'm not quite drunk enough to do anything stupid, and I feel strong! It is time for me to fight!"

The crowd cheered, and Thor raised a hand to silence them.

"Today I've picked perhaps the first good match I shall have in many years! It is not often that I get a Dragon Rider attending my birthday, and, as luck would have it, today I do! I will be fighting the Rider of Midgard, Hiccup Haddock!"

The crowd roared in approval at Thor's announcement, and everyone turned to look at Hiccup as he stood grinning up at Thor. Odin, who was seated next to his son, gazed steadily at Hiccup. Hiccup met his gaze, but was tugged away by Eir. She faced him.

"You silly idiot," Eir chided.

"Oh, come on," Hiccup laughed. "It'll be – fun."

"I wanted to dance with you."

"Well, sorry, my honor as a fighter is calling me to battle," Hiccup grinned. "But I'll dance with you after I revive from getting knocked out."

Eir made a face. "Maybe I won't feel like dancing then."

"Oh dear, that'll put me out of a Goddess for a partner," Hiccup joked, seemingly unconcerned. "I guess I'll just dance with Frigga instead."

Eir laughed heartily, placing a beautiful hand on Hiccup's chest.

"Oh, you're just too good," she said, looking up at him merrily. "That would be a sight to see, you dancing with Odin's own wife!"

"Well I'm about to fight Odin's son," Hiccup asserted. "And the crowd is cheering for me. I've got to go."

Eir wrapped her arms around his chest. "Well, you are a fool, but good luck," she smiled, hugging him. "If you're as good a boxer as you are a dancer, you'll be fine."

"How comforting," Hiccup muttered sarcastically. "Now I'm off to battle a God. See you later."

"Have fun!" Eir called after him, as he made his way through the crowd to the boxing ring. People slapped him on the back and gave words of advice as he walked by. When he reached the ring, Thor was already there, getting his knuckles wrapped with cloth.

Taking a deep breath, Hiccup hopped spryly up to the ropes and ducked under them. He had seen enough boxing matches as a Viking to know how they worked, but he had never been in any himself. He walked to the opposite corner to Thor, where a stool sat. As he came up to the stool, he saw someone pushing his way through the crowd to his corner.

It was Asgeirr.

Hiccup couldn't help but break out laughing as he saw the look on Asgeirr's face. His Master pushed his way through the last few people and stepped up to the ropes.

"What madness are you getting involved in now?" Asgeirr spoke in exasperation. "You finally get a day off and you decide to squander it by battling Gods? For amusement!?"

Hiccup laughed, and picked up the cloth to start binding his hands. "You're training me to fight Gods, right? This is practice. You should be happy, Master."

"Happy!" Asgeirr snorted. "This won't be practice, it'll be a massacre. Thor will eat you alive."

"Probably," Hiccup grinned. "But I'm not one to back down from a challenge." He looked over his shoulder at Thor, who was leaning on the ropes exchanging small talk with some ladies. "Besides, the winner gets to kiss Eir. Any words of expert advice from my good friend Asgeirr?" Hiccup chuckled.

Asgeirr sighed. "If you insist on continuing with this ridiculous nonsense, I suppose you might as well do it right. Just remember what Vulcan taught you. Thor is big and strong but slow. He's also probably half-drunk by now. Dart in and out, tire him, confuse him."

Hiccup nodded. "Right."

"And don't be scared of his muscles," Asgeirr added. "Thor is impossibly strong, and his punches will feel like someone threw an anvil in your face, but The Wolf has taught you to take pain, so you'll be fine. Don't be afraid to take a few of those bludgeons."

"That's right," Hiccup replied.

"And," Asgeirr leaned forward and spoke in an undertone. "Despite all appearances, you have one advantage." He whispered. "Jarn af vapna."

Hiccup grinned. "Iron arms."

"Exactly," Asgeirr smirked. "Thor doesn't know you have them. He's probably forgotten that you have metal hands, and he has no idea your arms are also Dragon Iron. It'll catch him off guard and will also cause your blows to be very painful. So with that in mind," Asgeirr leaned forward, "make your first punch a brutal one. It might surprise him enough to knock him off his feet. Please tell me you aren't battling to a knockout."

"Oh, no," Hiccup laughed. "Although he'll most likely knock me out. The first to get knocked down and stay down for five seconds is the loser."

"Dear God." Asgeirr stepped back from the ropes. "Well, you're doomed, Hiccup."

Hiccup roared with laughter.

"Thank you for your kind support, Master," he chuckled, turning back to the ring. "I'll keep that heartwarming forethought in mind."

"Have – fun," Asgeirr laughed, and Hiccup, finishing wrapping his knuckles, sat down on the stool to take off his shoes. Handing them to Asgeirr, he stepped forward to the center of the ring, rolling his shoulders. Thor, seeing him, straightened up and grinned.

"Hiccup is ready!" He shouted to the crowd. "Are you all!?"

The crowd thundered their approval, and Hiccup stood still as Thor raised a hand to quiet them.

"The rules are simple," Thor announced. "I'm a simple man. Only fists are allowed, and no punches below the belt. First man or God to get knocked down for eight seconds is the loser. Make sense!?"

"YES!" The people cheered.

"Then let's get started!" The multitudes cheered and pounded tables as Thor pumped his arms. Then, with a smooth, practiced motion, Thor stripped off his shirt.

Oohhs and aahhhs came from the crowd, and Hiccup heard a shrill female voice yell, "I love you Thor!"

Thor smiled back, waving a hand and flexing his giant biceps, to the delight of the people. Hiccup laughed, and Thor turned to flex at Hiccup jokingly. Everyone looked at Hiccup expectantly.

"Shirts off," he grinned to himself, and, with a shrug, took hold of his collar and tugged off his black and red shirt.

There were no ooohhhs and aaahs. Instead there was a low murmur from the people, one of respect. Hiccup did not look like a God. He did not have biceps the size of a man's leg, like Thor, and he did not weigh as much as a horse. But he was shredded.

His muscles were lean and powerful, sleek and easy-flowing. He looked every bit as dangerous at Thor, if not more. He was not the boy who had been taken from Midgard only two weeks ago. With the help of magic, he had grown strong.

Thor noticed it too, and Hiccup thought he saw the look in the God's golden eyes become a little more cautious than before. Hiccup also noticed some girls at the edge of the ring looking him over and pointing. He had never had anyone look at him with awe when he took off his shirt, and the feeling was rather strange to him.

Thor and Hiccup walked to the middle of the ring, and faced each other.

"Hiccup, I just want to make clear that I don't have anything against you," Thor told him with a broad grin, clapping him on the shoulder. "I like you, in fact. But when I fight, I fight. No mercy. I'll hit you like a hammer on an anvil."

Hiccup grinned. "I won't take it easy on you either. No hard feelings, let's just have some fun."

"Right." Thor smiled. "And remember, the winner has to kiss Eir."

"My kind of motivation," Hiccup laughed, and Thor winked.

"I've wanted to kiss her for a long time," Thor teased. "Maybe today is the day."

"We'll see." Hiccup raised his hands, and he and Thor bumped knuckles.

Then it began. Scarcely had Hiccup time to get set before Thor swung, and the blow came harder and faster than any fist he had ever seen in his life. With a yelp, he ducked, and felt Thor's hook go right through his hair.

Hiccup remembered Asgeirr's tips just in time. Thor was right after him, swinging, and Hiccup danced backward, evading the punches.

The crowds began to laugh. "Get him, Thor! He's afraid, Thor! Take him! Stop running!"

Thor kept pressing Hiccup towards his corner, and when he got there he easily ducked under one of the Gods big punches and came out behind him. Thor had not yet landed a punch; in fact, he had not even touched Hiccup.

"You're quick," Thor commented, doubling up his fists again.

"And a good thing, too," Hiccup chuckled nervously.

"But not quick enough!" Thor shouted, and sprang on Hiccup. This time his fists connected.

The crowds screamed in delight as Thor pummeled Hiccup, hammering him into the corner. It looked like the fight was already won, for Hiccup was cowering under the onslaught, looking defeated. However, anyone who knew about boxing could see that Hiccup wasn't being hurt at all. He was keeping Thor's fists away from his face and simply deflecting them, taking away their force and power. Hiccup wasn't getting hurt in the slightest. However, the crowd didn't know that, and they kept cheering crazily for Thor.

"Get him, Thor!" "You got him!" "Flay him!"

Hiccup was hiding under the cover of his arms, feeling Thor's giant fists hit his body, his sides, his arms. He heard the crowd all cheering for his opponent, and he gritted his teeth, watching with his eyes carefully from under his arms. Waiting.

All of a sudden the whirlwind of Thor's blows ceased, and every mouth in the crowd's jaw dropped as the scene suddenly changed.

Thor staggered backward and fell to the mat, his body quivering as he tried to recover from the vicious uppercut Hiccup had just dealt him. Hiccup had struck the big God with such suddenness and accuracy that no one had even seen it.

Hiccup stood above him, his smooth muscles already coated with a light sweat. He breathed deeply and counted with a calm, cool voice. He did NOT seem defeated in the slightest.

"One. Two. Three."

The people were struck dumb with awe, and then they roared their approval. When Thor began to move at the count of one they began to cheer and scream, now expecting a very good fight. On the count of six Thor rolled to his knees, and Hiccup stepped back to let him stand. Thor staggered to his feet and then stepped back, dazed. He shook his head.

"I forgot," he admitted ruefully, rubbing his chin with his wrapped hand. "You now have Jarn af munr."

Hiccup laughed, tapping his elbows for the odd clinking sound. "No. Jarn vapna."

Thor grinned. "Arms of Iron!" He shouted to the crowds. "The Riddari packs a punch!"

"Ironarm!" The crowd cheered. "Hiccup! Ironarm!"

Hiccup could now see Thor's attitude change. No longer was the God thinking Hiccup would be a match for him – he thought he might lose. So did the crowd. Instead of cheering for Thor, they were now cheering for both of them.

Hiccup decided to capitalize on his good start. With a fierce grunt he threw his second punch of the fight, and Thor hastily stepped back to avoid it before retaliating with a hard cross. Hiccup blocked it, and the force of the blow jarred his metal arms.

"Damn," Thor nodded, dancing backward. "You are strong, Hiccup."

"It's the metal arms," Hiccup grinned. "And it helps that I'm a genius and you're just a bumbling idiot."

Thor shook his head, smiling. "You're getting good at taunting the opposition, Hiccup. That's my expertise!"

"Is it?" Hiccup laughed, swinging another two punches and getting them deflected. "Then get to work! How come you haven't irked me yet?"

"I was taking it easy on you," Thor replied, thundering a punch into Hiccup's sternum. With a grunt, Hiccup was pushed back against the ropes, and Thor was on him, powering him into a clinch.

"Not taking it easy anymore, huh?" Hiccup groaned, as Thor slammed him in the side with a powerful hook, his back striking the ropes hard.

"I don't like to take it easy," Thor answered, as he and Hiccup struggled back and forth. "I didn't take it easy on your girl last night. It was fun." Thor grinned. "Barely fit, but it was fun."

Hiccup compressed his lips, firing a punch at Thor. "Astrid is on a different world, Thor. That's a no go. Try another method of riling me up."

"Aiah doesn't even like you," Thor went on, hammering Hiccup with another blow. "She's disappointed in you. She's here today, actually."

"Is she?" Hiccup asked, swinging a hook into Thor's shoulder. It bounced off the thick muscle. "I didn't see her here."

"She's behind you," Thor said, looking over Hiccup's shoulder.

"Huh?"

"No, she's right here!" Thor broke out of the clinch and slugged Hiccup on the side of the head. Hiccup was hurled to the mat, bouncing off it.

Asgeirr was right. It felt like he had been hit with a sledgehammer. But Asgeirr was also right that he was used to pain. Hiccup rolled over quickly and got to his feet.

Thor nodded approvingly. "Good recovery there, but I distracted you. Don't get distracted, it's bad form." He swung again, and Hiccup, still slightly dazed, had trouble blocking one of Thor's punches and it caught Hiccup on the ear, leaving a dull roaring sound on the side of Hiccup's head.

The crowd roared and cheered as the fight went on. For another five minutes Hiccup and Thor sparred, trading blows, but Thor dealt the most and more often. Hiccup knocked Thor down once and Thor knocked Hiccup down four times. The fourth time Hiccup had barely gotten to his feet in seven seconds. It had become clear that he was losing the battle.

Knowing that he had to resort to his brain to win, Hiccup tried a new trick. He deliberately made a poor attack, and Thor took advantage, swinging a vicious uppercut into Hiccup's chin.

Hiccup pretended to stagger, and Thor came after him to finish him off. Hiccup grinned as he saw his ruse work, and ducked and lunged upward with a right cross. He caught Thor on the cheekbone, snapping the God's head backward. Going low, Hiccup rammed two vicious punches into Thor's gut, then body-slammed the big God against the ropes. Thor grunted in pain.

"My God, you're weak," Hiccup mocked, blood trickling down his face. "They call you a God? A six year old girl could give me a better contest."

Thor laughed, swatting away two of Hiccup's punches with ease before shoving him away and giving him a crushing blow to the face.

"Hiccup, when you were little, did your father ever toss you up into the air?"

"More than once," Hiccup grunted, blocking the next two blows with some effort. "He tossed me miles high. My dad is a monster."

"Well, you're about to experience that again!" Thor exclaimed, and with a grip as strong as an iron vise, grabbed Hiccup's arms. With a yell, he twisted his back under Hiccup and used his weight to fling Hiccup in the air.

Hiccup flew. He was literally launched ten feet above Thor's head, and with a yell, crashed down to the mat, only half on his feet. Most of his weight landed on his left knee. Hitting hard, he rolled over, stunned. His knee was screaming in pain.

The roar of the crowd was the only thing he could hear at first. Then Thor, somewhere above him, began the count.

"One. Two. Three."

With a painful effort, Hiccup clambered to one knee at the count of four. Rising unsteadily, he blinked at Thor, trying to refocus. His knee was weak and agonizing, and it almost buckled.

"You all right?" Thor asked, doubling up his fists.

"Come at me," Hiccup muttered, raising his fists clumsily. "Drop me, I'm about finished."

"Then let's finish it!" Thor shouted, and leapt at Hiccup.

The crowd roared and cheered as Thor pounced on Hiccup. Mercilessly he pounded the smaller man into the ropes, then smashed Hiccup into the corner. Hiccup tried to block the blows, but couldn't get all of them, and time and time again Thor hit him in face. His lips got smashed, his nose squashed, and one eye swollen almost shut. But through each punch he took a breath, slowly recovering his strength. His knee buckled, and he rested by the edge of the ropes, crumpled. He listened to the crowd.

"He's finished, Thor!" "Get him!" "Yes, oh Thor!" "Crush him!" "Kill him!" "Maim him!"

Hiccup gritted his teeth. He was not finished yet.

Thor kept punching, and Hiccup kept steadily defending, growing stronger. He was on one knee, and one more solid punch from Thor would cause him to lose. But he wasn't done yet. He had one last trick up his sleeve.

He had regained his strength. Thor swung a hook, and Hiccup snapped into action. Ducking under Thor's blow, he crushed the God's arm under his own, and with his other hand smashed a brutal, metal-filled punch into Thor's elbow, right on the funny bone.

Thor howled, and Hiccup pushed off the ropes underneath Thor's limp arm. As Thor lost form, he drove a vicious jab into the big God's sternum. Hiccup heard the air rush out of Thor's lungs, and as the God opened his mouth to heave in a deep breath, Hiccup swung all his power and all his might into one single uppercut.

It smashed Thor on the chin, and the mouth was hanging open. Hiccup himself felt like wincing as he rattled Thor's jaw with the brutal blow.

Thor staggered backward, his golden eyes wide in shock. Then he fell backward, hitting the mat with a thud. His head whiplashed on the sweaty ground, blood spraying from his mouth.

Thor was down.

Hiccup reeled, trying to stay upright. One second passed. Two. Thor was still not moving. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Hiccup couldn't believe it. Eight seconds.

The countdown was up. He had won.

Hiccup wasn't aware of anything for a few seconds except the thundering roar of the people watching. They were yelling and screaming in amazement, in disbelief that their God had just been defeated.

Hiccup staggered weakly to the middle of the ring, where Thor was only just beginning to push himself to his feet. Hiccup gave him a hand, and the big God clambered slowly to his knees and looked at Hiccup with his deep golden eyes.

"I don't believe it," Thor said in awe, wiping his mouth with his wrist. "I can feel it, but I still don't believe it."

Hiccup laughed weakly, and gripped Thor's arm, embracing the God. "I got lucky," he said. "That was my last play, if you had hit me just one more time, you would have had me."

"Well, I didn't," Thor said frankly. "And you knocked me out cold for a bit. Never before have I gotten hit like that."

"It was a good match," Hiccup affirmed, and Thor turned to the crowd.

"I've never been beaten before!" Thor shouted. "Not until today!"

The people cheered and roared.

Thor grabbed Hiccup's arm and raised it aloft. "I give you your winner! The man with Iron arms, Hiccup Haddock! He will be your next Captain!"

"Ironarm!" Someone yelled from the crowd, and the people began to chant. "Ironarm! Ironarm! Ironarm!"

Hiccup looked out over the crowd of people and smiled. Then he looked up the table, where Odin and Frigga sat. He met Odin's gaze. The large God was staring at him levelly, with a stern and serious look. But he also looked different. He looked shaken. Afraid.

Hiccup looked away, and saw Asgeirr standing by the ring, smiling. He was not chanting, but instead he looked smug. He met Hiccup's gaze and nodded approvingly.

Thor lowered Hiccup's arm and threw it over his shoulder. He leaned in.

"Well, you won the fight, Hiccup, and you get the prize." He inclined his head towards the couches, where Eir was sitting, clapping her hands.

"Oh no," Hiccup muttered.

"Ha, you have to do it!" Thor grinned. "I want to see how this goes down. Get out of this ring, walk over to her, and kiss her. On the lips. Now."

"As you command," Hiccup laughed. "I'm off. Wish me luck."

Stepping away from Thor, he vaulted the ropes and jumped off the raised edge of the ring. Asgeirr was there, and Hiccup grinned at him.

"I'm about to do something stupid again," he told his trainer, and then walked through the crowd straight towards Eir. The crowd let him pass through, still chanting 'Ironarm.' They touched him and clapped him on the shoulder as he passed. Bloody and battered, Hiccup walked straight up to the lounge where Eir was sitting, everyone's eyes on him.

The beautiful Goddess rose to meet Hiccup.

"Well fought," she laughed. "I really didn't think you could do -"

Hiccup grabbed Eir by the waist, tugged her to him, and kissed her. Dead on the lips.

The crowd of people let out a massive, 'OOOOOHHH' as Hiccup did the daring act. With one arm wrapped around Eir's waist, he leaned Eir backwards.

She kissed him back.

Hiccup suddenly remembered the advantages of kissing the Goddess. Warm fire streamed through his body, the cuts on his face magically disappeared, and the pain in his knee vanished.

He broke the kiss, blinking, and Eir looked up at him, her deep blue eyes smiling. She slid her hands up his chest and onto Hiccup's shoulders.

"You can't just kiss me every time you want to get healed, you know," she teased.

"Who said I did it just to get healed?" Hiccup grinned. "But hey, that's a nice addition."

Eir laughed and hugged Hiccup, hanging onto his neck. She whispered in his ear.

"You can kiss me anytime you want."

Hiccup grinned, and picked Eir up to spin her around. He looked around at the cheering people as he did so, watching them laugh and chant his new name. He saw Thor leaning tiredly on the ropes, drinking an ale and grinning at him like a fool. He saw Odin and Frigga, staring in astonishment and wonder. Then he looked back towards Eir, whose face was snuggled up against his, holding him tight.

He could get used to this whole God thing. Definitely