A/N: Just a quick note from me! Hi! :D When I originally wrote this story it was to have 25 chapters and had a clear ending, but as I wrote this chapter things began to unfold that shifted the momentum of the story in a different direction than even I had intended! Which isn't a bad thing, but it does mean updates might be a little slow over the holiday as I write/edit/fix things into a cohesive tale of about 36(!) chapters.

I'll still try to update at least every week though, and so far, I've loved every comment, favourite and follow this story has received! So thank you, lovely readers, for giving this little plot bunny feel loved, wanted and I hope at least some of you are happy where this sorry tale ends up!

"Can you believe the New Year's celebration is tomorrow?!" Tohru's excitement was palpable, hand scrubbing at the edge of the table to remove the non-existent layers of dirt. Since Shigure's illness the house had been a little messier than normal, what with Rika's exam preparations and some school tests occupying all of their time. The idea of cleaning the house in anticipation for the new year had been the Honda girl's idea and like a flock of sheep - the rest of the denizens had fallen into place.

Which left Rika sifting through a collection of odd socks that had been retrieved from the depths of the machine, trying to match up to those she had demanded from the others. Shigure's she refused to touch but the others had been mostly organised into small bundles. A pair of her own had been salvaged from within the mess, as much as Rika had tried to swear blindly that none of them could possibly have been hers.

"The year flew," Tohru continued, "And apparently Momiji and Hatori are dancing at the zodiac banquet this time around. Imagine how wonderful they'd look."

Rika's hands stilled, a tilt to her mouth as she imagined that dance.

"Whoopdeedoo for them," Kyo's voice was flat as he appeared in the doorway carrying a bag in his arms. He didn't look angry but resigned. "At least I don't have to dance around in one of Ayame's dresses like an idiot."

"Ayame made the outfits?" Tohru's enthusiasm was unflappable and Kyo looked past her to Rika, silently saying.

'Are you getting a load of this idiot?'

Rika's equally silent response answered, 'She's your idiot'. He pointedly missed the comprehension, huffing malcontent as he gestured to the bag in his arms.

"Where do I need to put this stuff?"

"Is that the donation items?" Tohru asked, receiving a confirmatory nod. "There's more by the door. You can leave them there please."

The teen huffed off again. Rika, meanwhile, grabbed a rag from the other girl to dust out the tv stand and the various books that had made it to the shelf beneath. As much as she had felt she would be better served by studying today, the young woman found herself enjoying the routine of their cleaning. Both Yuki and Shigure were due at the main house the following day while Rika, Kyo and Tohru were heading to Kazuma's dojo for the festivities. From what Tohru had said, Rin would be joining them too. She was intrigued by Rin and her connection to Akito, knowing the other girl was close enough in age to herself but until now they'd hardly shared much by way of conversation. Passing ships was a more accurate descriptor.

It wasn't a personal thing, but it was a Sohma thing. Until Rika got all her memories back, she was working with Hatori to control what did come along and keep them from buckling her again. Even with promises that there were no more hidden connections tying her to the various extended family, Rin seemed like someone who carried a lot of troubles. Troubles Rika bore sympathy for but couldn't carry. Not yet at least.

Most of what she'd learned of Rin had been from Ren, and all of it had been worrisome.

Rika still struggled to comprehend why Ren was so forthcoming on almost every topic but Rika herself. In shards, she'd shared the complicated history that Akito bore with Kureno. With Shigure. Hatori and his eye. Rin's fall at Akito's hand. Things Rika couldn't have known growing up and now had to bear alongside the weight of her own involvement. Why the woman was so forthcoming was still a mystery. From what Ren continuously said, she didn't believe in the bond or the curse, and yet she outlined every part of it that she could into Rika's hands.

It could've been a ploy to undermine Akito's power. To structure Rika as some kind of foil. Strange considering everyone had made every effort to keep Rika from crossing paths with the other woman. Even Rika was apprehensive about meeting the Sohma head. Someday, it would happen. If she had any say in the matter, it would happen after her memories were completely restored. The image she had of Akito now was terrifying. Someone dangerous. Wicked.

Even with some kind of magical bond, why would anyone subject themselves to a person like that? What could motivate them? Part of that thought process was why she gravitated to Ren. The woman was part of the craziness without being part of it. A stroke of familiarity like that was just too good to pass up on. A gift horse too valuable to ignore.

"Rika?" A hand shoved against her shoulder and she jumped. "You're becoming as much of a space cadet as Tohru. Where's your head at?"

Kyo was standing over her and at the startled look on her face, he crouched down. Hands hooked over his thighs and concern etched into his features. Rika shook him off.

"Don't stress I'm fine."

"Then don't make it so hard to believe you." Grinning, she shoved at him and he stumbled backwards, coming to a halt on the floor beside her with a mirrored smile of his own. "I hardly see you anymore. Where've you been disappearing to on Saturdays? Rei's been bemoaning having to teach all those eight-year olds by herself."

Rika turned back to her cleaning but not before shaking out the dusty cloth at the teen. Tohru had moved towards the stairs if the offkey humming was anything to go by and the familiar click of the mop unfolding told her that the other girl was suitably distracted to not overhear. Not wanting to tell Kyo about the entrance exams just yet, she chose something else to divert him. Most of her questions of late had gone to Hatori, Rika accepted that Kyo had told her the bulk of what she needed to know about their youth. For the most part, she had accepted that. At least until Yuki and Shigure had outlined their plans for the celebration banquet hot on the heels of Hatori ringing her with firm advisement she stay away from the Sohma compound the following day. It had rankled her. Souring a night she'd been looking forward to. The plan had always been to spend it with Kyo and Tohru but to be pointedly told she wasn't welcome at the Sohma estate, with her family, – well, there had to be a reason. Rika believed she could root it out through Kyo.

"Why don't you get to go to the banquet tomorrow?" His form tightened, that now familiar narrowing of his irises alerting her that she'd hit a nerve.

"You don't remember that bit?" Rika shook her head. Ren had made insinuations towards the fracture within the flawed cat spirit's relationship to the Zodiac's. Rika had felt too invasive to ask Kyo about it without him telling her first, but right now she was battling indignation. It would've taken a bucket of ice water over her head to cool the embers of her determination.

Kyo's head bowed forward, Rika shifting one leg beneath the other to try sit comfortably. He was a hair's breadth from her cheek and she felt it then. An old sense of familiarity and peace that always alighted at times like this. Most often it was with Kyo, but recently she'd felt with it Hatori. Momiji. Kisa. The people she kept gravitating back towards again and again. The ones she'd had the strongest connections to as a child. The ones who calmed her frazzled nerves by just being close to her.

"We used to do New Years together y'know? Your mom always made sure we had movies, and a dinner. A banquet all our own she'd call it." Rika wasn't stupid. As much as had been told she played some part in the Zodiac's lives, she hadn't expected to learn she had access to every part of their lives. Nevertheless, the knowledge still stung. She and Kyo, whatever they were, had bonded as outsiders. "Just you, and me, and your mom. Shishou once. We'd stay up until dawn. Have cake. Throw our own party."

What read between the lines was the reasoning why. They'd not been welcome at the bigger party. To mingle with the true Zodiac. That they'd found one another then, and now, was beside the point. They'd been children. Kids who wanted part of their family so badly it ached. She could feel that old wound now. Sharp. Indignant.

"It's not right."

"No." He agreed. "It isn't. Maybe we've just got to find the stuff that's better now. Tomorrow I get to spend New Year's with Shishou, you and Tohru. That's new." Softness lined Kyo's features and his gaze instinctively darted towards the door. "That's good."

Rika flung her dust rag at him to break the heavy beating of her heart.

"When did you get so sappy?"

"Finish your dusting and shut up." The cloth was tossed back at her unceremoniously and Rika almost forgot the curiosity that had plagued her in favour of seeing that smile. Untethered. Simple. The kind of smile she should remember. Should have grown up seeing every day. The injustice of it all rankled and just as quick as it ebbed, her curiosity returned at full speed. Someday, soon, she was going to get to the bottom of all this.

"So why are you here?" Rika couldn't stop herself from asking the question, eyes darting around the quarters that Ren Sohma had been granted. She shouldn't have been here. She was meant to be at the Dojo, ringing in the celebrations with Kyo and Tohru. Rika had every intention of fulfilling that later on, but for now she'd also covered her bases. Fed them a story about a family tradition that would keep her away until later in the evening. There were gnawing questions that needed answering and as much as she knew it was wrong, Rika had come back to this woman yet again to find them.

Ren gave a small wave of her hand, movement flippant.

"This is my home. I have a right to be here." There was something dangerous in the tone and Rika placed her cup back onto the small table that sat between them.

"It's a funny way of showing it, leaving you out of the New Years celebrations." Her fingertips traced back and forth over the rim, gathering up the beaded traces of her tea. Ren created an aura of benign support but swimming below the surface was something more reptilian. Not like Ayame or Hatori, both of whom embodied their various Zodiac's in ways that made sense. There was danger in the way Ren studied her sometimes. Compliments were offered as freely as insults.

Rika couldn't have explained why she was needling the woman, less so why she was doing it tonight of all nights. What desperation did she feel to rattle this woman? Part of her visits until now had been trying to understand Akito and what had lead to Rika's own banishment. To form the pieces of the tale she possessed into a whole picture. Her mother's role as a Sohma. The relationship she had with Kyo during her youth. Kisa and Hiro's involvement. Tonight, it was something more feral. A need to push this woman far enough to actually give her something useful. Tangible. A memory she could hold and claim and comprehend. A means to round out the edges of all the fragments she held. Something in Kyo's words the day before had struck deep. If she could know, if she could understand, then maybe she could actually help.

Hatori would've reamed for being here, for defying his strict advisement to remain safe at Kazuma's house with Kyo and Tohru while the New Years' celebrations were afoot. Music drew her attention upwards and Ren smiled. Leaned close so that her perfume was cloying and pervasive.

"Do you want to see it?"

The right answer ought to have been no. To resist such a temptation. Instead she nodded agreement and was hastily led through a maze of hallways until they stood behind a screen door. It was slightly ajar.

"Akito attempts to keep everyone but the Zodiac from ever seeing, but one of the maids has a soft spot for me." That, or you terrified the poor girl, Rika thought. Falling into position beside the elder woman, through the sliver of space it was almost enough to see the two performing bodies across the room.

Momiji's shock of blonde hair drew a smile to her face, the perfect contrast to Hatori's stern concentration. The costumes, designed by Ayame, were both garishly detailed and endlessly beautiful but even that wasn't enough to mask the beauty of the man and teenager performing the dance. Momiji's costume, bright as a sunset splayed across the sky its colours melding - bounced against Hatori's dark costume, the upper layer almost matching his dark hair.

Rika's chest felt tight with something unnamed. Awe at the beauty that was kept from everyone but these select few. Anger that not everyone got to partake. Ren's expression was self-satisfied. Smug. It made her hands curl against her sides, nails buried against her palms. Swallowing down the rage that expanded under her ribs, Rika tried to center herself by focusing only on Hatori. A little of the tension seeped from her shoulders. He looked so serious that it would have been funny if she hadn't been clawing her temper back into place. Hot on the heels of anger was hurt. Exclusion. Emptiness. Her throat ached with it. Burned.

"Oh," Ren's voice was too close to her ear and Rika jumped, "It seems I've upset you." Rika pushed her way back from the door, sleeves dabbed at her eyes.

"It must be something terrible to feel the way you do." Rika's body tensed, sensing the shift of mood. The music from the party had begun to fade and in its absence she felt cold. Alone. "Never wanted by them like Akito was. I watched how you were villainized for your very existence you know. I tried to tell them all this zodiac bond nonsense was nothing more than irrelevant fantasy but -," Another hand wave, another easy and crushing remark.

Why had she come back?

What was the purpose of this?

"Of course, some of us can't help our breeding can we?"

Rika turned, confusion clouding her features. "What do you mean breeding?"

The dark haired woman advanced, a hand creeping along Rika's neck until she was held fast by the touch. Fingertips indented against the curve of her throat. Rika was tall, but Ren taller and somehow that made her feel all the more in Ren's thrall as she leaned into the touch so that it wouldn't ache. It didn't work. "Just like Akito, you were a toy. Just never one worth keeping. After all, who would dare lay claim to a bastard?"

It felt like a rug had been pulled from beneath her and Rika scrambled backwards, eyes wide. Unable to escape, Ren's grip tightened. She had to rasp.

"You're lying - I'm not -"

"Akira always did get duped by kindness," Ren murmured, eyes flashing coldly and then Rika knew. She understood without the next words needing to be said but the woman was on a roll, words flung like serrated blades, "I did always wonder what your mother said to fool him to her bed. Not enough to be worth anything clearly. Not enough to keep you."

"You're lying."

"Am I? Did I imagine my husband fawning over your mother or the rising swell of her stomach? Did I imagine the way he looked at you like you were the answer to everything? How my child looked to you over me?" Ren stepped closer, words hardly more than a whisper but they drowned everything else in the room behind them out. The expression on the elder woman's face oscillated wildly between disgust and glee. Spots began to curl over Rika's vision. "Poor thing. Always the laughing stock. Did you know they whispered about you then? The Zodiac reject. They whisper about you now. I hear it. They tell me. The poor child. The bastard child. The being lower on the totem pole than the cat."

"Tell me did you really think they cared about you? That any of this family cared? They give me means because I belong here but you - you never belonged. I was waiting for you to understand but it seems even intelligence skipped you in its blessings."

Ren pushed her away. Gasping breaths tore her throat in their desperation for oxygen and it took every ounce of energy to stay standing. To not curl to the floor. Ren's final blow was verbal and bone deep, the woman leaning forward to exhale it into Rika's gasping mouth.

"They don't want you. They never did. Not even your Takuto Hayashi could bear to look at your face."

Breathing hard, Rika leaned for purchase against a door and missed. Stumbled. Whimpered.

Fled.