12th June 2023
Today was the day Carla was going to meet the twins for the first time after being sectioned. Ciara assured Peter that Carla had made excellent progress but he was still worried in case she didn't respond well and all her progress vanished. Both Ciara and Peter had prepared Carla with pictures of the twins alongside the albums Michelle had helped prepared to make Carla's room feel a bit more homely.
To say that Carla was looking forward to the meet up was an understatement, she couldn't wait to hold her babies and couldn't believe it when she said she would be meeting them. Michelle had come along for moral support as well as to help Peter with the twins knowing it can be quite difficult dealing with two at once. Carla also couldn't believe she neglected one of her children when she was ill, Peter and Ciara tried to stress her to think of the bigger picture and that she couldn't control what happened at that time therefore it sometimes created unwanted emotions which would sometimes set her recovery back a bit but overall she was making really good progess and all of her family were proud of her for reaching this milestone.
"Right, you get the pram out and I'll deal with these two" Michelle smiles as Peter pulls up into a space at the hospital, Peter hopping out of the car to heave the pram out the boot, Michelle securely fastening the twins in
"Lets go and see mummy then" Peter grins as Michelle holds the changing bag as Peter starts the walk, he does daily, to see Carla in the psychiatric unit
"I'll sign you in Peter" Michelle smiles going off to the reception
"Peter?" Ciara smiles appearing from the door beckoning him in with the pram, Michelle grabbing the changing bag
"How is she?" Peter questions as Ciara smiles slightly
"Nervous I think, she wont admit it though, you know what shes like, but overall she seems happy, I think she may be mistaking excitement for nerves" Ciara grins as she knocks on the door of Carla's room
"I didn't know you were coming" Carla smiles sitting up from lying on the bed going to give Michelle a hug
"It can be a bit of a pain lugging the changing bag and pushchair around" Michelle grins as Carla beams excitedly, Peter pushing the pram into the room, smiling at Carla as she goes to hug him
"Ive missed you, I know I only saw you yesterday but I missed you"
"Hey I missed you too-" Peter starts only to be interrupted by Florence's cries, Carla stiffening in his arms, Michelle noticing and taking Florence out as well as grabbing her a toy to entertain her with
"Hey it's ok, shes just being fussy" Peter smiles as Carla nods not really giving eye contact, Peter glancing down to Isobel who was stretching in the pram
"Why don't we sit on the bed Car?" Peter suggests leading her over to the bed, sitting next to her holding her hand
"Which one do you want to hold first?" Peter questions as Carla bites her lip shaking her head, tears threatening to fall
"I don't know" Carla frets as Peter kisses her forehead bringing her into a hug
"Why don't I hold one, then you can just look?" Peter offers as Carla nods, Ciara entering the room
"Let's start with Flo" Peter grins as Michelle passes Florence over to him as he coos over her, more than usual as her eyes were open, gingerly sitting down on the bed with Florence in his arms Carla staring at her in some sort of trance
"Carla?" Ciara prompts as Carla reaches out to hold Florence's hand kicking her legs in response
"She's beautiful" Carla smiles slightly as Peter grins at her
"You can hold her if you like?" Peter offers as Carla glances to Ciara who nods, her paranoia still quite prominent as Peter gently passes Florence over to Carla
"She's comfortable, she doesn't do that for us" Michelle smirks as Carla looks up at her, a small smile on her face before glancing back down to Florence who was looking up at her
"Only because I'm her mum" Carla smirks as Peter beams, the breakthrough he was hoping for, Carla bonding with Florence as Isobel starts to whimper, Michelle getting her out and rocking her gently
"Could I…hold them both?" Carla questions looking at Ciara and Peter for the reassurance as Ciara nods which prompted Peter to nod as well
"How about we use your pillow, that'll make it easier" Peter says grabbing Carla's pillow and placing it on her lap, Carla shifting Florence into one arm and Michelle places Isobel in the other
"They look alike" Carla smiles as Peter nods putting an arm around her shoulders, Florence starting to whimper again before breaking out into a cry
"Oh dear she's hungry" Michelle smiles grabbing a bottle out of the changing bag
"Do you want to?" Michelle offers as Carla looks up at Ciara, then back down at Florence
"Cant I feed her myself?" Carla questions as Peter looks to Michelle
"Are you still producing milk?" Michelle questions as Carla nods slowly
"Yeah, I mean I guess you could?" Michelle glances to Ciara who nods, Carla lifting her top up guiding Florence's head towards the source of food as she latches on almost instantly which surprised Peter, she was usually stubborn when wanting to feed
"How do you feel Carla?" Ciara questions as Carla looks up at her smiling, stroking Florence's cheek as she feeds, Michelle getting quite teary eyed at the reunion considering how much Carla used to hate Florence
"Happy" she replies simply, Peter kissing the side of her head as Florence finishes feeding, Peter handing her the burping cloth so she could burp Florence, Carla supporting her head, sitting Florence upright as Carla rubs her back and pats it gently, Michelle holding Isobel
"Ciara?" Carla questions as Ciara smiles going to sit next to her, Carla shifting Florence back into the crook of her arm as she sleeps peacefully
"When am I allowed day release?" Carla grins as Ciara laughs at her eagerness going to tickle Florence's feet
"Soon, you just need to get through this week then we can think about it" Ciara smiles as Carla nods slowly, Florence opening her eyes, Carla tickling her tummy as she squirms, Carla picking her up and cooing over her
"That gives you something to look forward to doesn't it?" Peter smiles as Carla nods standing up with Florence in her arms going to place her in the pram, before going to take Isobel off Michelle and going to hold her, sitting down on the bed
"Hey gorgeous" Carla grins at Isobel ecstatically as Peter smiles at her interacting with Isobel in a way which wasn't fuelled with paranoia, Carla tickling Isobel's tummy as she whimpers before bending down and giving her a kiss on the cheek
"Have you been letting him dress them?" Carla raises her eyebrows glancing to Michelle who rolls her eyes
"Excuse me? I am capable of dressing my own kids" Peter huffs as Carla's face falls, Carla handing Isobel to Peter, before she gets up and goes to look out of the window
"Sorry" she mumbles as Peter hands Isobel to Michelle, who puts her back in the pram to sleep with her sister, Peter going up to Carla as she leans in to hug him
"It's alright, we understand" Peter smiles as Carla huffs tearfully "What happened?"
"Could you just get them out?" Carla panics as Michelle smiles pushing the pram out of the room leaving Carla with Peter and Ciara
"What happened Carla?" Ciara questions as Carla goes to sit in the corner of the room sipping her head in embarrassment as well as exasperation
"Make it stop" Carla pleads as Ciara smiles gently gesturing for Peter to help
"Hey, was it too much for you, love?" Peter questions as Carla nods tearfully crying into her arms which were rested across her knees
"Did that trigger something for you Carla?" Ciara questions as Carla looks up at her and nods, Ciara smiling softly at her as Carla sobs into her arms
"I just remember being in a bathroom bathing Isobel but there's like bits missing, I don't know" Carla explains as Peter sighs knowing that sometimes memories will occur from when she was really ill
"It's ok to not know Carla, we're here to support you, we just need to understand that's all so we can find a way to manage the difficult things, why don't you have a sleep, you've had a tiring day so far" Ciara suggests as Carla nods getting up and shuffling under the covers of her duvet, Peter stroking her hair lightly as she falls off to sleep pretty easily, both Ciara and Peter sneaking out of the room
"She seems to be making process" Peter states as Ciara nods in agreement
"I think she'll be fine, it's good we start building up that connection between her and the twins it makes the transitioning out of here easier" Ciara explains as Peter sighs just wanting Carla home but he knew it was a process and that it would take time for her to be truly herself
"I feel bad for taking them away from her"
"It's normal to feel like that, but she needs time to process everything just so we can be reassured it hasn't set her back"
"Is there any discharge date in sight at all?" Peter questions hoping that he'll get Carla back to himself without the nurses prying eyes
"If she continues to interact with the twins the same way she did today then things are looking positive its just about controlling her paranoia"
"Thank you again for everything"
Peter and Michelle made their way home, Peter informing Michelle about Carla's brief panic attack so that she understood. Peter wanted to spend the night with Aidan and the twins with the hope that Carla would be joining them very soon, he couldn't wait to be a family again with Carla, Aidan, Isobel and Florence, it was something that filled his mind with happiness as well as dread. Would Carla be able to put the past behind her and recover from her ordeal? Or would she continue to suffer with the deepest, darkest parts of her mind coming to the forefront?