I Triple Dog Dare You!

Chris: Last time on total drama island. Yours truly was off m.c.ing a swanky awards show. So Chef took over as host and man was he brutal to the campers. Not only did he dump them in the middle of the woods to fend for themselves but he left them alone with scary dude Sasquatchanakwa. They ran halter. They ran shelter. They ran into a crowded bat cave. Ultimately the girls admitted defeat so the guys shared their loot. But the girls outfoxed them and walked of with everything including their dignity providing once again that hot chicks trump gullible guys every time. In the end it was bad boy Duncan who took the walk of shame leaving three campers left in the game. Who going home? Who will our finalists be? Find out right now on Total Drama Island!

(Intro)

Chris: (Loudspeaker) Campers! Welcome to the semifinals. Your challenge will begin in five minutes.

(Confessional) Bridgette: I can't believe I actually made to the final three. I really did myself proud.

(Confessional) Heather: I knew I'd make it to the end. Big shocker. I just can't believe surfer girl and animal lover made it.

(Confessional) DJ: I never thought I'd make this far. I'm actually in the final three. Now it's time to win the whole thing.

(At the outdoor auditorium)

Chris: Campers congratulations on making it to the final three. Also the producers ran out of ways to torture you. So they asked the ousted campers for ideas. Turns out they had a lot. They provided us with the sickest most twisted and insane dares imaginable in TDI's version of spin the bottle. Starting with...Izzy, Cody, Tyler, Eva, Noah, Courtney, Trent, Lindsay, Ezekiel, Beth, Harold, Leshawna, Justin, Gwen, Geoff, Duncan, Owen and Katie and Sadie. Put them all together and we've got a high-stakes game of I triple dog dare you!

Heather: What you think this is fifth grade?

Chris: Each player will take turns spinning the bottle. The camper that you land on determines the dare you'll perform. You can take the dare yourself and win a get out of dare freebie or inflict the dare on a fellow camper in hopes of booting them out.

Heather: And if we refuse to do the dare?

Chris: Oh not a good option. Anyone who chickens out of their dare will be sent directly to the dock of shame. Board the boat of losers. Do not go to bonfire. Do not collect a marshmallow and do not win 100,000.

(Confessional) Heather: A sudden death elimination. Good one.

Chris: Okay who's ready to humiliate themselves first?

Bridgette: Oh what the heckI'll go. Someone has to. (Spins the bottle)

(Confessional) Chris: Okay so here's the deal. Chef and I have a little side bet going. Whoever has to pony up 100 bucks.

Chris: Okay let's get this party started. (The bottle and it lands on Duncan) Duncan's dare. Lick a Sasquatch's armpit. Bridgette you perform the dare yourself or dare one of your competitors to do it. (Chuckles) Either way someone's licking so arm pit in the next minute.

Bridgette: I triple dog dare Heather.

(Heather looks freaked out when Chef brings a cage with Sasquatch in it)

DJ: (Smirking) You could always imagine your licking an ice cream cone.

Heather: Shut up DJ.

DJ: Minus the B.O.

Heather: I'm warning you. (Licks the Sasquatch's armpit)

DJ: Oh and the pit hair. (This sends Heather into a convulsions)

Chris: Oh ho ho man. That was so sick. I nearly puked. (Chef looks at him) Nearly. (Heather spins the bottle and it lands on Ezekiel) Ezekiel's dare is chew on of Chef's toenail slowly.

Heather: Bridgette! I dare Bridgette. (Bridgette goes to take the dare) Don't choke on it honey.

(Bridgette sits on a small chair in the center of the stage and Chef clips a piece of his own toe nail and hands it to her)

(Bridgette then chews on the toe nail but she chews it faster)

Heather: Ah Ah Ah Ah. He said chew it slowly.

Bridgette: (Chews Chefs toe nail slowly) There satisfied?

Heather: Very. I'm just picturing Geoff watching this and something tells me he won't be eager to lock lips with you anytime soon.

Bridgette: You should talk pit breath. (Heather Glares at her)

(DJ spins the bottle and it lands on Beth)

Chris: Beth's dare. Rechewing a wad of Harold's gum.

DJ: I will take the dare.

Bridgette and Heather: Ew!

Chris: Dude it's chewed gum. Harold's chewed gum.

(Confessional) DJ: Believe me I find that chewed gum really gross and As much as I want to dare Heather to do it. But I also want to win a 100,000.

(DJ chews on the gum)

Chris: DJ wins the first freebie. And a tetanus shot if you.

DJ: Yeah please.

Chris: Bridgette you're up next. (Bridgette spins the bottle and it lands on Trent) Trent's dare. Drop a tray of ice into your undies and let them melt.

Bridgette: That's it? I can handle that. (Chef brings a tray of ice and Bridgette puts it in her undies)

Chris: Now that is one cool chick with a frosty tube chillin by the—

Bridgette: Just give the s-s-stupid f-freebie.

Heather: My turn and I'm taking the dare I don't care what it is. (Spins the bottle and it lands on Geoff)

(Confessional) Heather: There's no way I was going to let those losers get in front of me. I mean how bad can the dare be. I already lick a Sasquatch's armpit.

Chris: Geoff's dare. Get shot out of a cannon into Pig feces.

(Heather gets in the cannon and Chef fires her into pig feces)

Heather: Eww! So gross. So gross!

Chris: Well Heather you just earn a freebie. DJ you're turn.

(DJ spins the bottle and it lands on Izzy)

Chris: Izzy's dare. Give a purple nurple to a sleeping bear.

DJ: What's a purple nurple?

(DJ goes inside the cave and finds a bear asleep)

DJ: (From the cave) Hey there mr bear. I'm just gonna give you a little pinch and be right on my—(Bear roars and a sound of fabric tearing from the cave then DJ runs out of the cave screaming)

(Chris gives DJ his second freebie and Bridgette spins the bottle and it lands on Harold)

Chris: Harold's dare. Lick jam from Chef's toes.

Bridgette: I dare Heather.

Heather: I'll use my freebie.

Chris: Good call. (Heather spins the bottle and it lands on Tyler) Tyler's dare. Drink powdered fruit punch from the communal toilet.

Heather: I dare Bridgette.

Chris: Quite the predicament Bridgette. Do you use the freebie or do I save it for an even sicker dare down the road?

Bridgette: (Inhales deeply) I'm going in.

(Confessional) Chris: So freakin sick. Chef is down.

(In the communal washroom Chris mixes the fruit punch into the toilet with a plunger)

Chris: No way. That's so gross. (Chuckles and gives Bridgette a straw. She then slurps mixed fruit and toilet water. She then runs outside and throws up. Chris and Chef felled like puking but they held it in)

Heather: At this rate Geoff's gonna need a fumigation squad just—(Bridgette burps in her face)

(DJ spins the bottle and it lands on Owen)

Chris: Owen's dare is eat dog food.

DJ: I'll take the dare.

Chris: Dude you have two freebies you can use better yet you can dare an opponent. Like say one without a freebie?

Bridgette: You still have a bit of pig feces in your hair.

Heather: Oh go stick your face back in the toilet.

DJ: It's cool bro. I'll do whatever it takes to win a 100.00. (Eats the dog food making Chris throw up and pays 100 to Chef who throws up as well followed by Bridgette and Heather)

(Confessional) Chris: That was so gross! (Vomiting and coughing)

(The game continues on with dare after dare, with Bridgette and Heather daring each other, and DJ taking every dare he's given. This includes Cody's dare. Eat hard boiled eggs while lying down which was performed by Heather. Gwen's dare. Walk across a tight rope holding meat above shark infested water which was performed by Bridgette. Eva's dare. Bench press Chef which was performed by DJ. Justin's dare. Kiss a dead fish which was performed by Bridgette. Noah's dare. Wear a beard made out of bees which was performed by DJ. Leshawna's dare. Wrestle with an alligator which was performed by Heather)

Chris: I can't believe no ones dropped out and DJ's got twenty freebies.

DJ: Yeah man.

Chris: Bridgette and Heather have squat but not to worry there's still plenty to be motivated about.

Bridgette: (Whispers to DJ) If you help me take down Heather I'll share my winnings with you.

DJ: (Whispers Back) What if you don't win?

Bridgette: (Whispers) I'll teach you how to surf.

DJ: Well since I remembered how swim. Yeah deal. Chris I like to give away half my freebies.

Chris: Uh well okay. Are you sure?

(DJ gives half his freebies to Bridgette)

Heather: Hello? That's is totally unfair. Get out your rule book and do your rule checking thing. They're obviously gonna gang up and whoop me with dares. There has to be a rule about this kind of thing.

Chris: Sorry them's the rules. Not a rule to be had. (Bridgette spins the bottle and it lands on Courtney) Drink a blended purée of Chef's mystery meat.

Bridgette: Eeny, meeny, miney Heather. (drink a blended puree of Chef's mystery meat)

(Heather then does multiple dares such as swimming in an inflatable pool of leeches, wearing a chicken hat and pretending to be a chicken, slapping herself in the face repeatedly, eating a live cockroach, kissing one of Chef's socks in the guise of a sock puppet play of the Princess and the Frog and wears a baby's diaper)

(Bridgette then spins the bottle and it lands on Lindsay)

Heather: (Sighs) Finally I can catch a break. There's no way Lindsay can think of anything bad.

Chris: Ooh you're not gonna like this one. Have your head shaved by Chef.

Heather: What?!

DJ: (High fives Bridgette) Lindsay rules!

Chris: What's it going to be Heather? Are you going to take dare? Or the walk of shame?

(As Chef approaches, Heather panics and kicks the razor out of his hands. It flies in the air and lands on her head. The chair then falls backward as bits of hair fly away. When the chair returns upright Heather only had a few clumps of hair left)

Heather: (Feels her head) Noooo!

Chris: Wow. Well with that was an unfortunate accident. Looks like Heather's out.

Heather: What are you talking about? He shaved my head!

Chris: True but you didn't actually accept the dare. If you had you still be bald but at least you still be in the game.

Bridgette: Mean or not. Girls shouldn't be bald on tv.

Heather: (Echoing) AGGHHH!!!!! (Her scream can be heard all the way to playa de losers)

Chris: Sorry them's the rules.

Heather: I thought you said theyweren't any rules!

Chris: Yeah I know it's complicated. But here's the rub— you lose they win.

DJ and Bridgette: No way! We won! Yes!!

Heather: Fine! But you'll be hearing from my lawyers!

Chris: Yeah yeah I know it's gonna be a long ride.

(At the dock of shame)

Heather: A long ride to court when I sue you for everything you've got! (The boat leaves with Heather on it)

Chris: And then there were two. Tune in to see you will win the check for 100,000 on Total Drama Island.

Heather: You want drama?! You be penniless! Jobless! You name will be mud on every blog from here to cape breton!