Written for: calbeebellona. May 7th, 2018 ShieldShock "Their pick-up line wasn't as good as any of mine, I'm just saying."
The Avengers had fans. Steve knew this, yet it was still a bit surreal to walk through the halls of Javits Center and see twenty-one people dressed in homemade Captain America costumes of varying levels of quality.
He himself had suited up for the occasion. The shield strapped to his back felt heavier than normal and he was sweating under his helmet. So far, no one had recognized him. Tony had explained it to him while insisting he couldn't go to any fan event in plain clothes and sunglasses.
"Do you have any idea how shady that looks? Pun half intended," he said with the beginnings of a grin. "If you really want to do this, you have to go whole hog. Get in there and work that suit like the real Captain America."
"I am the real Captain America," Steve had said.
"And that's exactly why no one will notice you."
Steve didn't have to be a genius to know that didn't make any sense. And yet, he'd been walking around the convention all day, attending panels, browsing the dealer's room, buying a few things, and not a single person had anything to say about the Actual Real Steve Rogers in their midst except, 'Awesome cosplay, dude.'
"Maybe we should go," Steve muttered to Bucky after they'd been asked to pose for pictures for the hundredth time. "Pretty soon, someone's going to figure out we're not just fans in costumes."
Bucky, clad in black pants, combat boots, and a black jacket with the left sleeve ripped off, punched his shoulder. "Come on, Punk. I thought you were having fun. This was your idea."
"I know," said Steve. He quickly averted his eyes as a girl with his face plastered all over her clothes ran by. "I didn't think it'd be so… this."
A man with a distended gut and a cheap shaggy brown wig walked by in an amateurish Winter Soldier costume. His entire right arm was wrapped in aluminum foil, complete with a crudely drawn red star. He caught sight of Bucky and paused to give him a once over. "Your Bucky costume's not bad, but that's the wrong arm."
He waved his right arm, allowing bits of foil to fall off, and then disappeared into the crowd as Bucky's jaw fell. "It is NOT the wrong arm!"
He clenched his fists as Steve made a token effort not to laugh at his best friend's pain. "Come on, Buck. I thought you were having fun."
"Bite me," Bucky stomped off towards the refreshments table, and that was probably the last Steve would see of him for hours.
He wandered into the main corridor, filing past kids with toy propulsion blasters and young women in catsuits and red wigs. A few more fans asked for photos. One of them wore a shirt that loudly proclaimed she was Steve Rogers' future wife. He fake smiled like a champ and made a beeline for the dealer's room as soon as the overly touchy girl set him free.
It was less crowded than before. Steve could actually move without fear of crushing someone's foot. He stayed close to the walls, ignoring the multitude of Hawkeyes, Thors, and even a few Lokis hanging around. A few booths away, a bespectacled young woman in blue jeans and plaid would have been the most average person he'd seen all day, if not for the signs she was carrying.
SUPPORT JANE FOSTER!
JANE FOSTER WAS ABLE TO BUILD A BRIDGE TO ASGARD IN THE DESERT WITH A BOX OF CAR PARTS.
JANE ONCE PUNCHED A NORSE GOD IN THE FACE. CAN YOU PUNCH NORSE GODS IN THE FACE? JANE FOSTER IS BETTER THAN YOU.
A shirtless man covered in green body paint sidled up to her, his grin a perfect contrast to her irate frown. "Hey, babe. Wanna hang out later?"
"That depends," she said, "do you want to talk about how Jane Foster is unfairly treated by so-called Avengers fans and denied credit for her scientific innovations by drooling fangirls with internet access and delusions of becoming Asgardian royalty?"
The shirtless man blinked. "Uh… Jane who?"
She rolled her eyes and kept walking in Steve's direction. From up close, he could almost say he knew her, but her name escaped him. "Do you need help holding those signs?"
He hadn't meant to speak. The words just popped out of his mouth of their own volition. The young woman brightened. "See? That right there is a much better line. Here you go."
She handed him the 'Punched a Norse God' sign and Steve made a note to ask Thor about that later. He had a feeling he knew which god got punched and that was a story he needed to hear.
"My real pick-up lines are much better," Steve said, earning a smile from the girl whose name had finally popped into his head. "It's Darcy, right? Darcy Lewis?"
"Yup," she said as they re-entered the hall. "I guess you've seen the pics online. I've been working with Jane for years and last week I made the mistake of looking at the Avengers fan forums. There was a lot of bullshit on there about Thor dumping Jane because she's 'boring' or that she dumped him because 'she's a bitch'. As if the woman just sprang into existence when Thor needed a muggle girlfriend and her life has no meaning outside of him. For fuck's sake, they broke up mutually. They're still friends and Jane was working her ass off on that bridge since before Thor was even a thing."
"That's awful," Steve said. This was why he stopped going to the fan forums after the first time. That and the rather… suggestive art people drew of him and Bucky. Or worse, him and Tony.
"I even found this website, janefostersux. And that's 'sucks' with an X because who cares about proper spelling when you're an unemployed, basement-dwelling edgelord. I told Tony about it and he broke through the firewalls and filled every webpage with pictures of omelets. I'm not sure why omelets. I guess he was just hungry, but it killed traffic to the site so I can't complain." She heaved a long sigh. "Anyway, thanks for listening to me ramble."
"No problem," Steve said. They stopped in the hotel lounge for a break, leaving their signs at their feet as they took the last empty spots on the last empty couch. "I think it's great that you're doing all this. Dr. Foster deserves to be respected."
"Got that right." She reached into her bag and pulled out a spiral notebook decorated with science stickers. "I'm collecting signatures from fans to give to Jane later. You in?"
"Of course," Steve said. He wrote a quick note for Jane, who would probably be amused to learn how he finally met her legendary intern.
"Aw, you're awesome," Darcy said, with a smile that made Steve's stomach flip. "And you're the best Captain America cosplayer I've seen all day. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were the real thing."
Steve coughed and rubbed his neck. "Well, actually…"