Chapter 29

That night's drive to Niles' restaurant couldn't have been any more different from the first time they'd gone there together. Cold, indifferent anger had been replaced by gentle (if still cautious) teasing, and smiles reigned over faces that had previously been dominated by resentful frowns. It felt like springtime had arrived after an eternal winter – the ice sheet between them was beginning to thaw, at long last.

They still had to tread with care, given their history, but there was no reason why they couldn't hold a decent conversation. They were two adults with two children in common; they had to be mature enough to comb through the issues that remained on the backlog, no matter how difficult or unpleasant they might be. They needed to, if they wanted to have a harmonious, working co-parenting relationship for their girls (and, perhaps, even more…).

Maybe it was a matter of not being reproachful or vengeful about what had happened, but rather discuss the series of events that had led to them drifting apart and not contacting one another for nearly a decade.

Apologies would probably surface at some point, but forgiveness was the first step to healing, and both Niles and C.C. were more than ready to finally heal.

And what better way to wave the white flag than over a warm plate of food and some good wine?

Niles already had a few ideas that he could ask his staff to pick up from his personal wine cellar, a little and very recent addition to his office which Niles liked very much and had admittedly (and unapologetically) splurged on. After having worked and succeeded in the culinary business for so long, Niles had picked up certain expensive tastes, including wine collecting. He had gotten his hands on some of the finest specimens out there (the astronomic price tags certainly proved this) but, until tonight, he hadn't really had a good excuse to open one of his prized bottles.

Good thing his luck had changed.

"Looks busy tonight," C.C. said, bringing the former butler out of his thoughts as the two of them got off the car.

"What does?" he asked.

"Your restaurant," C.C. replied, gesturing over at the long line of people queuing at the door.

"Oh," he blinked, looking at the size of the queue for a moment and then looking ahead, towards where the maître d' would be waiting for them.

He had special instruction to be on the lookout, so that his boss and the boss'...new lady friend...could have the smoothest transition to their table possible.

It was all part of the plan to make the night the best that it could be. And it was going to start at the business that Niles had tended to like the seed of a fruit tree, watching and nurturing and building it up with investments and property developing, hoping with everything he had that his dream would succeed. And by God it had succeeded.

For Lottie. It had all been for Lottie, to secure her future and give her the life she deserved.

And now, alongside being able to give his daughter everything she could ever want or need, he had a business that he would never want to give up, or sell. He had poured his heart and soul into every aspect, reaping the rewards when and where he could. It was the second pride and joy of his life, behind his family, and he knew in his heart that he'd sooner die than see anything happen to it.

Luckily Kathleen was no longer its publicist, so there was slim chance of anything too terrible happening.

But this wasn't the night to think of that. A faintly amused noise from C.C. brought him back to the conversation.

"That's all you can say? "Oh"? You have at least a hundred people waiting to get in here! It'll be back around the corner before the night is up!"

Niles chuckled lightly, "Well, it is Saturday night, at the end of July. A lot of our patrons enjoy the rooftop terrace, this time of year. We open it up when the weather is best."

They were closing in fast on the door as he said that, and he waved to the young man at the head of the queue.

"Evening, Anton. Is our table ready?"

"Of course, sir," replied the man, smiling (beaming, really) at Niles and not-Kathleen.

Niles had wanted to keep his break up with Kathleen private. Naturally, the entire restaurant personnel knew about it by noon and had even agreed to go out for celebratory drinks after their shift was over. Not that they were planning on telling their boss – they knew Mr Brightmore was a private man who didn't appreciate his life being a topic for gossip. They could only live in hope that this new lady friend was the exact opposite to the Wicked Witch of the West End.

"If you'll follow me, I'll take you right to it," continued Anton, gesturing inside.

They followed the maître d' all the way to one of the restaurant's lavish private dining rooms. It wasn't the biggest, but it was certainly the most intimate – perfect for long overdue heart-to-heart talks. It wasn't the same room they'd dined (or rather, argued) in when C.C. had first visited his restaurant; Niles had made sure of that. He'd also made sure that his staff prepared their room for a romantic-ish dinner. As such, the lights were low, smooth jazz was playing in the background, there were two chilled champagne glasses waiting for them at the table, and there were several roses neatly arranged in several vases that had been placed strategically around the room.

"Well, I'll be damned! You do know how to be fancy, Butler Boy!" C.C. cooed cheekily, patting Niles on the back. "You've come a long way since those cheap-ass days!"

A strange, half-choked snort sounded in the room before the person trying to hold it in could stop themselves.

Both Niles and C.C. looked at each other, each quickly figuring out that neither was the culprit, before they both looked over their shoulders at Anton.

Anton, who was rapidly turning an unusually bright shade of pink. Most likely from a combination of trying to hold in a breath that contained a laugh, and embarrassment at being caught.

"Are you quite alright?" Niles asked.

The maître d' beamed back, blurting his words out in the out-of-breath hurry that came with holding back his show of mirth.

"Completely fine, sir! No need to worry about me!"

That could be left open for debate, considering the fact that he was still quietly trying to return his breathing to normal once they had all made it fully into the room.

But Niles wasn't going to press him on the matter – the zinger had been a good one, and it had come from nowhere. It was only right that he should be allowed to laugh at a joke, especially one that caught him by surprise.

And he liked the fact that it clearly meant at least one member of staff was starting to like C.C.. It hadn't exactly escaped his notice that Kathleen hadn't exactly been popular at the restaurant. In some cases, he was almost certain it came close to hatred.

But he had tried to keep his working life and private life separate, so he had tried to deal with fiancées and staff members separately too, as and wherever he could.

It was yet another burden off his shoulders, to not have to worry about work and home conflicts colliding.

He grinned at C.C. after the realisation had hit him fully, waving the maître d' away discreetly when the man tried to get back to some semblance of professionalism by pulling out C.C.'s chair.

That wasn't his job. It was Niles', to make sure she was comfortable. After all, he was technically both her date and her host, and he wouldn't be doing either job properly if he just let her stand!

And she seemed to appreciate it, too, as she took off her coat (that did get passed to Anton) and seated herself delicately at the table.

"You've truly learned how to be a gentleman over time, haven't you...!"

Niles smiled at her comment as he undid his jacket and took his own seat.

"I may have...become more slightly refined than I already was," he replied, taking and unfolding his napkin. "But the rest is all as you should remember. The same devilish rogue you have always known."

It was C.C.'s turn to hold back a laugh over that, "Well, you got one of those words right!"

He wanted to tell her to just let the laughter out – he wanted to hear that he had amused her. It was a blessing just to be sat in her presence again, with no anger or malice between them, but somehow the laughter made it all seem that bit more real. Like the peaceful birdsong in a tranquil garden, or gentle music in a distant room.

But he couldn't. Partially because he knew the night was still young and he had more time to make her laugh, but also because Anton had just approached with the menus, which he promptly handed over to his boss and his guest.

"If you don't mind saving your menus for the main course and dessert, sir and madam, the staff and I have already selected today's specialty as your starter course," Anton said. "Lobster and Cornish crab bisque served with brandy butter and, if sir and madam wish, accompanied by a side of English Garden Salad."

"Is that fine by you?" Niles asked C.C., trying very hard not to show just how pleased he was with both himself and his employee. He trusted his people, and once again they hadn't disappointed – C.C. loved seafood.

"You won't hear any complaints from me, Butler Boy," she replied, taking a sip of champagne.

That actually brought something to the forefront of Niles' mind – the wine. He had yet to ask Anton to get a bottle from his special collection! He knew just which one he wanted them to try.

"Wonderful. Anton, we'd like the starter course with the English salad and please go to my private wine cellar and get us the 1947 Cheval Blanc," Niles said, smiling warmly at his employee and pretending he couldn't see the surprised look on C.C.'s face.

"1947 Cheval Blanc?" C.C. asked as soon as Anton had left to get their first order. "Niles, that's one of the most expensive wine bottles in the world! It costs like– "

"304,375 dollars," Niles cut her off. "I know. I bought it after closing a particularly difficult, yet highly beneficial, real estate deal with British Land."

C.C. had been taking a sip of the champagne as he'd explained, but she nearly choked as soon as she'd heard the name.

She'd heard it plenty of times from her own father.

British Land was one of the largest and oldest property development and investment companies in the entire country! Their portfolio covered everything from supermarkets and shopping malls to apartment blocks and office buildings – they kept their fingers in all the pies they could reach and they expected no less from the people they went into business with

Their amassed locations were worth billions when put together. They didn't even have to cross the street to spit on most of their much younger competitors!

They were the fat cats of the business world; the old men in the well-established country club, swirling brandy glasses and smoking fat cigars, and only ever acknowledging the people who were sat all around them doing exactly the same thing.

And yet Niles...former butler to a Broadway producer, who used to rewash the rags he cleaned the dishes with so that he didn't have to break a buck getting another one, had somehow walked right in there among them and had gotten a deal!

But...but how?! Even in her wildest dreams – and believe her, she'd had plenty – she'd never imagined Niles getting so rich, or so...well-connected! What had happened in that meeting room?! How had those businessmen seen an up-and-coming restauranteur and property developer and not simply laughed him out of the building?!

She just about managed to swallow the too-large gulp of champagne that she'd nearly choked on, turning what could've been a small medical emergency back into a slight interruption in an otherwise perfectly nice meal.

It stopped him from getting too concerned, which really was another bonus.

"B-British Land...?!" she cried out. "How did you pull that one off?! Most of those men won't even speak to anybody who doesn't have a vineyard in France, or bank account totals that look like several phone numbers!"

"Oh, believe me, I know!" Niles said, wearing quite possibly the smuggest grin C.C. had ever seen on him. "But as it so happened, their then chairman, Sir John Ritblat, was a regular here, and when he caught wind that I was the owner of 122 Leadenhall Street, he was suddenly very interested in us meeting."

"Really?" said the former producer, opening the menu and beginning to browse. "How come?"

"They needed a spot to build a new skyscraper," explained Niles, following C.C.'s example (although he already had a good idea of what he wanted to order). "And I just happened to own said ideal spot. I got it cheap – the building that used to stand there was badly damaged by IRA bombings during the 90's, so I bought it fairly cheap, refurbished it, and then rented it out to a number of tenants over the years. It was one of my first investments when Lottie and I first moved to London. Anyway, Ritbalt and I rendezvoused a couple of times and, eventually, we reached an agreement. He got his building and I got sixteen million pounds."

C.C. had to practically weld her jaw shut to keep it in place after he'd said that. She had to use the same sort of willpower to not accidentally toss away the menu so it went flying across the room, or crush her champagne flute.

Though, even if she did, it was pretty darn obvious that Niles could either get it fixed, or have it replaced!

Six...sixteen million pounds! It was almost too massive to comprehend! Not the number in itself, obviously, but just the thought was...was...well, it was far beyond anything she'd imagined Niles would have for himself! The man used to scrub toilets to earn enough to buy cereal, for Pete's sake!

And now, here he was. Casually telling her how he'd had land with room for a skyscraper on it, and how one successful sale had only turned into more.

"So, I had the restaurant and some rental properties that I'd developed, but I wanted some extra help, so I went to a financial advisor."

C.C. was really tempted to say that, whoever this person was, they didn't sound like any ordinary advisor – more like some sort of witchdoctor in disguise, who could somehow cure all troubles with money and bring the person eternal luck.

But she didn't. She was too awestruck by it all to even start to form the words on her lips. Confused, too. And definitely more than a little bit impressed. How could she not be, when the man she'd always teased for having nothing had grown to have everything?

She leaned in without even thinking, drinking in every word of his story.

"I listened carefully to them, I bought the stocks and shares they suggested and I diversified my portfolio when and wherever I could. I stuck mostly to property because, well, I had to take advantage of the London property prices, of course, but I also sold some office buildings to companies, a few retail places. I saw what I could make of each of them, and went for it. By the end of it, and as of today, I'd say I have roughly two hundred and fifty million pounds in the bank available for me to use as I please."

Right away, the blood started pounding so hard in C.C.'s head that she scarcely thought she'd heard him correctly in the first place.

"Wha...what did you say...?"

She said it as loud as she thought she could get away with – the blood was pounding and there was ringing in her ears. Was...was this giving her a heart attack? Was learning that Niles, servant and former bane of her existence, had earned two hundred and fifty million pounds going to be the thing that finished her off?!

It couldn't be – that was a ridiculous thought! Almost as ridiculous as she once would've found the idea of having a baby with the man across the table from her!

Said man continued with a smile, clearly pleased that she was taking an interest, "Two hundred and fifty million pounds. That amount of savings certainly has its uses...! But it was worth it. I used the money as leverage to help give Lottie the life she deserves. I...I wanted to make things right, after the whole...situation…"

He looked rather ashamed of himself in that moment, but C.C. wasn't thinking of it. Whatever welding could've kept her jaw shut suddenly snapped, letting it fall open.

She hadn't heard him wrong. He'd been just as right the first time as last, and she couldn't believe it!

Nobody back home would believe it had played out like this, either – Niles, the one who'd made pancakes for people in the New York mornings and had then spent the rest of the time cleaning the kitchen, was now a multimillionaire in his own right!

He'd made more money by himself than C.C. had given him to look after Lottie, and that was saying something!

And...and he had used it to take care of her. He'd given her a fine home, the best food and education, all the clothes, books and toys she could want, as well as all the love that their little girl deserved.

It was better care than so many single fathers would've done in his position. Heck, better than a lot of non-single guys would! Those guys weren't real men, though. How could they be, if they refused to step up and do what was right, when the time came? That wasn't the mark of a man.

Especially not one who loved his family with his whole heart, as Niles clearly did.

Even thinking that was suddenly making the air in the room – particularly around her cheeks – feel a whole lot warmer. And Niles really did nothing to help that situation when he looked right in her eyes across the mood lighting, his own shining even without brightness to make them sparkle.

It was almost as though they were stars...

His hands slid across the table towards hers, "I really do have to thank you, you know. If it weren't for the money you gave me to raise Lottie, I never would've made it this far...!"

C.C. felt her breath hitch as his hands got nearer to her own. The table was small, so their skin was becoming almost...achingly close.

But she had to pay attention to his words. Focus. He had just...thanked her? She scanned her mind quickly for the answer, and soon had it. He had; at least some part of her brain had been sane enough to pay attention when the rest had gotten distracted!

But it was hard not to go there again. Especially seeing as he was being more generous with his praise than he had to be! She'd only given him what was necessary, to make sure he and Lottie were comfortable! Nobody praised absent parents for paying child support, and that was basically what she'd done. Only she'd done it in one lump sum, instead of regular amounts.

She wasn't worth the thanks he was giving. Or the smile on his lips.

She had to look down at the table just to answer him, shaking her head softly, "I only did what any mother would've done, in my position...it was your hard work that had it all pay off. Your determination to be good to Lottie..."

"You were good to her too," he insisted, "And to Mia. You've gotta give yourself some credit, Babcock. You helped more than you know – anything else is, and will always be, irrelevant."

C.C. shrugged; she knew there was no sense in arguing, but she still didn't feel worthy of any kind of praise. She'd done her duty and that was that, as had Niles. Only he'd worked extremely hard to exceed expectations.

"I don't know," she said, sighing, "I often feel like I am a bad mother for not having been there for Lottie while she was growing up."

"I feel the same where Mia is concerned," he replied, speaking in a kind, soft voice. "I wasn't there either. But we had an agreement – there's nothing we can do to change that, and it won't do well to dwell in de past. We just need to–"

"–move forward," she completed.

"Exactly. We can start anew, for once, and try our best for our girls," Niles said.

"Our incredibly mischievous girls," C.C. chuckled, "I still can't believe they pulled all the things that they did! I mean, they are barely eight years old!"

"We'd better buckle up then," he said, smiling again. "I have a feeling their teens are going to be a wild ride!"

Both parents shared a laugh. Their girls were truly something, but the simply wouldn't have them any other way. The pair were soon deep in conversation about their girls – sharing countless stories and fun memories with one another. They were so engrossed in conversation they barely noticed Anton when he returned with their wine and starter course. Food and wine were trivial compared to their fascinating children, both so alike and so different at the same time; Bubbly Mia was a math prodigy, whereas Charlotte had a knack for languages and history. One loved sports, while the other preferred the performing arts and painting.

It was fascinating, and the night (and the different courses) were soon flying past as they discussed their twins. It was, of course, only natural – they were getting to know the children that, up until a few weeks before, had been a distant dream. The kind of dream that is both painful and beautiful. A world of possibilities had opened up, and they wanted to drink all of it in.

"…Mia used to do the same thing!" C.C. said when Niles finished telling an anecdote about Lottie needing to sleep with a light on until the previous year. "She'll never admit to it, but the dark scared her shitless."

"Lottie is just as proud," said Niles, digging in the créme brûlée Anton had just brought for their dessert. "I've always thought she got that from you!"

C.C. suddenly stopped where she was, her whole body language shifting. To Niles, it was almost as though some strange ripple had moved through her, causing her to retreat across the table.

It was as though the light had gone from her face, too. All the happiness that had gone with it faded into...nothing.

Niles didn't like that one bit - his stomach was turning into knots even at the thought of her being upset. It had been the most wonderful evening, and he didn't want it to end in nothing, all because of one thing that had been said.

That had happened to them too much, for it to keep going on.

He watched, frowning, as she slipped her dessert spoon into her hand and started tapping uselessly on the hard top of her own creme brûlée.

"Yeah, I'm too stupidly proud for my own good sometimes, aren't I?"

He set his own spoon down, understanding immediately what she was talking about. It was impossible for him not to know, considering it was a rhetorical question he thought to himself every day of his life.

The circumstances that had gotten them here. The arguing and the fights, the split down the middle, the insistence on never talking to one another ever again...

It all sounded so juvenile now. But that didn't mean that it hurt any less. They had both been in the wrong, and it had caused far too many people pain, even if they'd thought it was best at the time.

Well, pride did strange things to people. They knew that, and it very clearly made C.C. ashamed to think of how she had acted.

But she had to remember that she hadn't acted alone. He'd been just as much at fault as her.

The knowledge that they had both been so wrong squeezed at his heart, tighter and tighter until he thought it would burst in his chest. He could only imagine that she was feeling the same way.

But they had agreed to start afresh - to move forward. What better way than by clearing the air over this?

He leaned forward, more into the space that she had moved back from.

"Hey; you are not the only one who suffers from that here. I've been just as much at fault as you, when it comes to pride."

C.C. huffed quietly. She really didn't think that was true – after all, she had been the one to decide that it was better that they never spoke again, rather than talking things through. She'd been the one to first insist that Marie acted as a go-between, rather than putting aside everything to do what was best for their children.

She'd been the one to deny him the right to see or know Mia. To deprive Lottie of her sister. To split up a family that didn't have to be...

And for what? To keep some idiotic sense of having the upper hand? To make herself feel superior?

Probably both. Not that either had worked in the long run. All she felt now was small; a diminished version of herself, with a long way down to climb off her high horse, and lot of apologising to do, if she ever hoped to reconnect properly with the people she loved.

Niles had obviously heard her little scoff, because he continued to try to reach out.

"There's no need to be like that. You know I'm telling the truth."

"I don't doubt you're telling the truth. What I do doubt is the idea that your pride has been anywhere near as insufferable as mine," she said. "I estranged and then sent two halves of a family across an ocean from each other with mine!"

"You were hurt," he insisted, shame beginning to take over his features. "And with good reason – I should never have said the things I did, and I certainly should have talked to you the morning after, when I thought you'd left…"

"Why would you ever think that…?" C.C. said – actually, it was more like whispered – after a few silent moments. "Why would you ever think that I'd left you? Did…did I give any indication that I wasn't enjoying myself the night before? Or did you think I was just heartless?"

Niles flinched at the poison dripping from the last of her words, but he really couldn't blame her. Their first night together had been…beautiful. Unique. It had been everything he'd ever dreamed of and more. She'd been wonderful, and after they'd finished, she'd been the one to cuddle up next to him. She'd even fallen asleep within minutes, still holding onto him. He remembered this because he'd spent the following hour or so just watching her and thanking the heavens for the opportunity to have her with him.

She'd done nothing wrong…

It had been him – it had been his own insecurities what had made him jump to conclusions. Not her. It had never been her…

"You did nothing wrong, C.C.," he said, sighing. "I wasn't in a good place back then. I was insecure, and I… I just felt…"

"That someone like me could never really love you?" she completed, only this time her voice held no anger or reproach; instead, there was only sadness.

"Yes…something like that. I felt there was about me you would consider worthwhile – that I was good for some fun, but that was it. I had nothing to my name, I worked cleaning somebody else's underwear, and you…you were you," he explained, "Powerful, gorgeous, intelligent…you were the real deal. And I was a bum with nothing to offer. I felt that I couldn't possibly compare to the many rich suitors you could have had if you'd wanted to."

Honestly, he still didn't feel as though he could compare to any wealthy, handsome, powerful man that she could meet in New York. He might have earned more money than even he had ever dreamed of in the last eight years, but that wasn't the defining factor. In terms of old money, all it did was prove that he and any other wealthy Tom, Dick or Harry could all keep her in the comfortable life she was used to. They would be on equal footing, in that regard.

But that didn't mean they were equal in any other regard. How could he compare to a sculpted, muscular, dark stallion of a man, who screamed mystery and excitement with his very presence? What if that man had wit and charm, and knew exactly what to say to sweep a woman off her feet?

What if...what if that man was good in bed? The best she'd ever have, and could do things that made her...

He had to slow his brain to a halt before it finished that thought. He didn't want to think about it – especially not in high-definition picture quality, complete with surround sound; that was how most of his unwanted thoughts played out.

In any case, he knew he'd never stand a chance, if a man like that appeared on the scene. Part of him felt like it would be better if he didn't even try, under those circumstances

It was a small miracle that they weren't under those circumstances. He had more freedom to fight for what he truly wanted.

If she wanted the same, that was.

He hung his head, unable to meet her eyes, "So, I lashed out. To call it not my finest moment would be an insult to the mediocre and cringeworthy moments I've had over the course of my life. I was in pain, and I suppose I must have turned it on you to disguise my own wounded pride...and my broken heart. But it was wrong of me, and I cannot even begin to tell you how sorry I am. For everything – all that came after that as well, especially my calling you an…"

Niles trailed off, disgusted with himself. He still couldn't understand how it had ever occurred to him to call her that horrible thing. There was no justification to what he'd done, not even her laughing at his declaration of love. She'd had every right not to believe him, but he'd been too selfish and self-centred to see it. He didn't deserve her. Not when he'd hurt her so…

"I'll forgive you under one condition," she said, this time reaching out for and grabbing at one of his hands. "If you forgive me for…well… laughing at your when you said you loved me. I shouldn't have, even if I felt you didn't mean it."

"But I did mean it!" Niles said, looking into her eyes. "I know you may not believe me, but I meant it. I was madly and hopelessly in love with you. Still, I don't blame you for not believing me – as you said on our botched first night out, I did nothing to show it. I showed the opposite, in fact."

A lump had formed in C.C.'s throat as Niles had spoken. A lump so big C.C. feared it would never go away. He'd used the past tense. As in, he loved her one but he no longer did…

What had she been thinking? She'd been a fool to believe that he… that he'd still think of her that way. She'd let Marie's hopeful ideas get to her, and she'd missed the obvious – Niles had moved on. Otherwise, he would have never even attempted to marry another woman, not even to give Lottie a mother. She'd lost him. She'd let their chance slip between her fingers, and there was nothing she could do. There was no one she could blame but herself.

Niles was in his right to have moved on. After all, what had she ever given him apart from their children? A broken family that he hadn't been able to have and to hold?

That probably was his biggest regret.

Still, she had to understand. She'd fucked up, and he'd moved on. What the hell had she been thinking? That nearly a decade of disagreements would be solved over dinner? That they could simply rewind and pick up from where they'd left off before any of their fights had happened? That he would just take her back and try to see if things worked out between them? She was an idiot. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. He probably just wanted to have a good, healthy co-parenting relationship with her for the sake of their babies, and that would have to be enough. It was the only thing she could give him.

He owed her nothing; tonight was a kindness he'd extended and that was it.

She had no right to try and demand anything else, either. It would be unfair to try and make him change his mind, when she'd already put him through more hurt than one man should have to go through over a woman.

Where would her sense of decency be, if she insisted? It would be nothing but selfish of her to tell him to turn around and come running back, when he was no longer in pain where he was.

She wasn't hurting him anymore. That was the only thing that mattered between them.

She just had to live with missing her only chance. She couldn't just throw a hissy fit and expect to get it back, that wasn't the way it worked.

The only thing she could do was take in a deep (if silent, so Niles couldn't hear and ask) breath, and let the feeling of her heart shattering into pieces get squashed to the bottom of...of wherever repressed feelings went.

She didn't care where they went, really. She couldn't, if she wanted to keep her sanity. It was going to be difficult enough anyway, so often seeing what she could've had if she hadn't been such a stuck-up idiot. What she could've called her own, if she'd just behaved like a decent human being, for once in her life.

What would've been her future, if she'd simply told Niles that she loved him, too.

Instead, she'd probably see some other woman come along instead. Not like Kathleen – a good woman, who loved Niles like he deserved, and respected their arrangement with Mia and Lottie.

And that woman would be the one. The real one, that he'd find everything he'd ever longed or hoped for with.

The one he'd say "I love you" to, and never say it in past tense.

Trying to squash down those feelings was about as easy as trying to cram one of the Thanksgiving Day Parade balloons into a box, while it was fully inflated...

But she had to do it. She had to accept that this was her future, whether she liked it or not. She'd missed her chance at love, at a whole and complete family, at a life that made her smile whenever she thought of it.

Not that it would ever come to pass.

Not for her, anyway. Mia and Lottie, on the other hand, could have something of the family they'd always wanted. They'd each have both their parents back, and the sister that they'd never known before...

It wouldn't be like most families, but it would be something. And certainly the most C.C. would ever have.

She'd learn to live with it, she told herself in her hurting heart. She'd manage for the girls, working with their father on the things they needed to get done. They'd grow up, beautiful and strong and happy, and they'd never get to hear so much as a peep of what their mother was feeling.

C.C. thought, if she was really lucky, she might actually learn to be okay with it, by that time.

If she told herself often enough, the pain would have to dull, wouldn't it?

"Everything is forgiven now," she just about managed to get out with a forced smile. "We said and did things we shouldn't have, but there is no reason why we shouldn't move on and be wonderful parents to our girls, right?"

"Right," he replied, mirroring her smile. "You are right…"

Of course she was, C.C. thought to herself. As far as he was concerned, this was the only type of relationship that could and would ever exist between them from that point onwards.

"I propose a toast then," he said, bringing her out of her thoughts. "To our girls."

"To our girls," she chorused as she and Niles clinked their glasses together. "The best thing we've ever done."

"Hear, hear," came the hearty agreement and reply, just before both took a sip of their drinks, settling them down in silence.

The lack of conversation after that did not feel comfortable to Niles. It felt as though they had run out – like there was nothing more to be said. And he hated that. It reminded him somewhat of them not even being on the same continent, only with the added pain of seeing her right there. No matter what went on in their lives, as long as they were on speaking terms, they had always managed to find something to do, or talk about, or watch...

Or dance to...

That was it! He had forgotten the music in the background – the soft jazz was perfect for a slow, romantic dance in a private setting.

Ideal for the evening he'd wanted for them both.

He pushed his away from his side of the table, "I had almost completely forgotten my manners! Would you care to dance?"

He said the last part as he stood up, offering a hand out to her.

And for a moment, C.C. stared back, not daring to take his hand when she knew it meant accepting she'd never get to properly hold it. She'd only ever briefly feel the bliss of his warm skin on hers.

She'd never feel the cold, hard edge of a wedding ring. Not one that she'd put there, anyway. Maybe his next, actual bride would be on friendly enough terms with her that she'd be invited to the wedding, and then she could ask for just one dance with the groom...

But that was too far in the future to say for certain. And she couldn't miss the opportunity for it now, even if she knew it would never be anything more than a friendly activity at the end of a fine meal.

Besides, if she was going to believe that this was how it would be from then on, she had to have practice.

She plastered the smile on her face again, talking his hand for possibly the last time as she rose to join him.

"Love to, Butler Boy."

"Mia, quick, get up, it's them!"

Lottie's whispered order was enough to get Mia out of her bed and rushing to the window, where her sister had been keeping watch for the past hour and a half. They'd been taking turns to watch for their parents' return ever since Marie had put them to bed well over two hours ago.

"Yep, that's Dad's car," Mia said when she got to the window and spotted their Dad's Rolls Royce pulling up the driveway and coming to a halt before the front door.

That was their cue.

Trying to be as quiet as they possibly could (otherwise their grandmother would most likely drag them back to bed by the ear), they slipped out of their room and tiptoed to the top of the staircase. There was a nice spot behind a huge decorative vase where they'd be hidden from view and still be able to both see and hear what was happening downstairs. The perfect spot to witness their parents' reunification!

They'd barely had time to hide before the front door opened and their parents walked in.

"Well, that was lovely," Niles said, smiling at their mother.

"It really was," replied C.C., also smiling.

But it wasn't a full smile, Mia realised. It was her "barely-holding-it-together" smile. A smile that would always make Mia's heart sink.

"Oh no…" Mia mumbled to herself, all hope beginning to drain from her heart.

"What, what is it?!" Lottie replied.

Mia shook her head – that was enough for her twin to understand. Things weren't alright. Despite there being no Kathleen and no upcoming wedding, things hadn't worked out.

"But now I had better go upstairs," C.C. said, "I…I need to pack up if Mia and I are going to fly back home tomorrow."

The girls froze, hearts stopping at the words their mother was speaking.

Speaking, as she started to hurry upstairs. Like she was escaping, or running away before she could burst into tears...

But why was she going to burst into tears?! What had happened at dinner?! Why were she and Mia leaving in the morning?! No one had said that before now! Luckily, their father could stand in for them and ask all their questions, as he rushed up a few of the stairs behind her.

"Pack?! But...you're leaving, already?!"

His voice was panicked. He didn't understand what was going on here, either. No more than the twins did.

None of it made any sense! What could've gone so wrong that they were being split up again, without any warning or prior knowledge?!

Their mother's explanations didn't add up, either. She sounded...rushed, or even just as panicked as their father. That was the impression her expression gave off, too – shifting uncomfortably and eyes settling anywhere but on him.

"Yes. We, uh...we'll be taking my father's jet. He sent it for us, for when we needed it. And we do need it. Mia's going back to school soon. She needs to get her books...and other stuff..."

Mia nearly blew their cover by getting up to shout in protest about how she'd rather they all stayed, but Lottie must've had a sense for what she wanted to do, because she grabbed her wrist and motioned for her to shush.

She didn't want them to miss what happened next, as their father tried to untangle the words in his mind so he could lay them out in a coherent, hopefully persuasive order.

"But...but, I don't understand! I thought that we were–"

"Thank you for the lovely evening," their mother spoke above his garbled mess of an...anything. She looked like she was trying hard not to cry as she gently and briefly cupped his cheek. "You have no idea what it means...!"

She then turned on her heel and fled up the stairs. And both twins would've sworn that they had seen tears over spilling the pools in her eyes as she went.

Her bedroom door went behind her, leaving the whole house covered by a defeated silence. Like the aftermath of a long battle, in which neither side had emerged victorious.

The twins watched as their father let out a deep sigh, before stumbling back down to the entrance hall and collapsing in the armchair there, head in his hands and shoulders slowly heaving.

They both wanted to go to him. To hold him, and to tell him that it would all be okay. But they couldn't – even if they weren't supposed to be asleep, they couldn't tell him something that was so obviously not true.

Whatever had happened, it had made it all over. Their family was done for and they had failed in their plan.

Even if it killed them both to have to admit it.

But there was nothing else to be done. There clearly wasn't any love to be found between their parents, and even if they begged and pleaded to be allowed to stay together, that could never happen.

They were just kids, trying too hard to help adults in a world that they didn't understand. And now they were paying the price for their failure.

So, taking one last look at their father, heart broken just as badly as theirs, the twins silently made their way back to their room. Lottie's room, as it would be afterwards, and Mia would return to her own in New York.

The separation would start all over again, only now there were no plans left to bring anybody back together.