Leorio's not actually there at the picnic in the anime, but meh. My story my rules. He's there. Enjoy the chapter.
"What? You didn't bring any food?"
Snake gave the man in front of her a blank stare. Kurapika had simply said that they were having a get-together in the park. She'd been told nothing about food.
"That's my fault, Leorio," the blonde said. He was seated on a blanket in the grass, upon which there was also an assortment of snack foods and desserts. It kind of reminded her of the buffet from the Halibut Lodge. "She's staying in a hotel right now, so I didn't want to pressure her into bringing anything."
"The kids and I are staying in hotels, too, you know?"
"What would you have brought if I'd told you to bring food?" he asked her. Her brows creased.
"...I'm not sure. I might've asked what kind. Definitely why."
"See," Kurapika gestured, as if his point were proven. "It would have inconvenienced her. Besides, it's fine. There's enough food here for five people."
Leorio sighed and plopped himself down on the edge of the blanket. Following his example, Snake took a seat on the corner. There were other people in the park other than their group. A few had brought blankets of their own, and another tossed a frisbee back and forth. Gon and Killua were chasing each other in circles around a far off tree like a dog chasing its tail. Leorio returned to stuffing his face with a cupcake he'd started before she'd arrived, while Kurapika watched the two new teenagers off in the distance.
It was a strange atmosphere. As if there weren't any danger threatening them. As if no rock the younger ones fell on could scrape their knees, or no stranger in the vicinity could have ill intent. Snake wasn't sure how to behave. It seemed she was allowed to eat, but none of the food looked particularly nutritious. Maybe the sandwiches that had meat.
She picked one up and began eating it slowly. She didn't quite understand why they had get-togethers like this. It was like a noisy, large-scale version of the rock games she and the others played when she was little, but even if those managed to make them smile, no one ever gave up their constant vigilance. She supposed there did appear to be no immediate threat close by, but that didn't necessarily mean there wasn't one.
Why was she there in the first place? All of these people, they were bonafide heroes. Or, at least, they played on the side of good. Wasn't this a sign she still hadn't come any closer to definitively pegging down who she was?
The memory of crying from two nights ago disturbed her, so she threw the thought of it aside. More importantly, what did the boss of the Phantom Troupe mean when he told her placement would be her salve? And what made him decide to withhold offering her a path to that solution?
A groan from Leorio pulled her back to the present. "Alright, what's wrong with you two? We're here to have fun! So why don't you get whatever's bothering you off your shoulders so you can lighten up already?"
Kurapika sighed, and gave Snake a look before turning to Leorio. "It's just...with the leader dead…"
"That just means you can focus on your primary goal!" Gon butted in, suddenly appearing. "If you need any help in getting the eyes of your people back, just say the word!"
Barely a second after he finished speaking, Killua snuck up behind and smashed one of the pies into his face. This prompted Gon to grab one of the others and begin the chase once again.
At this, Kurapika's solemnity cracked, and he began to laugh. Leorio, too, chortled at the boys' antics. Snake allowed herself to smile a bit as well. Gon's sincerity was refreshing, and it was nice to see Killua unbothered by her presence, even if it was just for the moment.
"See, there ya go! The two of you should be smiling!"
Still grinning, the blonde looked back over at Leorio. Then, he turned his attention to Snake and asked, "Was there something bothering you, too?"
Her faint smile faded with the question. "What does it mean that someone told me I need 'placement'?"
"Huh? Where'd that come from?" Leorio wondered.
Kurapika, less thrown off by the question, asked, "What was the context you were told this in?"
"There's a...personal trouble I've been having lately." Her eyes rested on the sandwich in her hands without really seeing it. "The person who said he could help told me that. He also said that I needed structure." To justify her nature, he'd said. But that was more than she needed to let these people know. "I've thought about it incessantly, but I'm still unsure of what it means."
Both Leorio and Kurapika seemed to fall into thought, Leorio scratching at his chin. Apparently this piece of advice was not some common knowledge she was unaware of.
"Could they have meant like a solid job?" the older of the to guessed. "Like, maybe since you work on an on-hire basis, it isn't enough responsibility?"
"He could also mean," Kurapika offered after a moment, "and I'm sorry if this touches on something sensitive, that you lack something like a family?"
It was true, she was lacking in that second category, but that's the way it had always been. There was no reason that it would cause her issues now. Perhaps it was something along the lines of what Leorio suggested. Not that it was necessarily her work, but maybe she needed devotion to something. She'd devoted her life to playing the role of a hero before, to writing her own epic journey and tragic end. And now she'd lost it. Could that have been what the Troupe leader meant? But then the part about justification still didn't make sense. And what about when he'd said her placement had already chosen her?
"Who was this guy, anyway?" Leorio suddenly spouted. "What gives him the right to tell you what you need in life?"
Well, she had an assumption, but to be entirely accurate, "I don't know. I'd never met him before."
"Huh? Seriously? Why'd you tell him your problems, then? Was he claiming to be some sort of medium or something? You can't listen to those kinds of people, Snake. They're all scammers! All of 'em!"
"It's not exactly bad advice, though," Kurapika countered.
"Whaddya mean? How good can it be if we don't even know what it means?"
"How would you feel if you didn't have the goal of becoming a doctor? Or if you couldn't get into med school?" This caused the man to begin to grumble. "That path you're walking acts as a sort of placement. What their placement is is different for everyone, but I think he's right. It's hard to live when you don't have a place to belong. Does that help you at all, Snake?"
"A little." She took another bite of her sandwich.
At this point, Gon and Killua plopped themselves down and began shovelling junk food into their mouths, apparently starved by their activity. Leorio smirked. "We're here to enjoy our reunion, so let's just have fun. We can talk about the serious stuff later."
The rest of the picnic went on without hitch. At one point Gon became insistent that Snake eat a cupcake, to which at first she steadily refused. Food was for functionality, she explained, and sweets only countered that. Gon rebutted by saying since the cake made him happy, he functioned all the better. Leorio also joined in with Gon's coaxing. Eventually, Killua made a bratty comment about how she was someone who was about as detached as a dead insect, and she wouldn't eat the cupcake so it was more for them, anyway.
She promptly snatched the treat from Gon, peeled off the paper, and ate half of it in a single bite. The shock on Killua's face was worth it. And besides, one sweet wasn't going to make her sluggish. It was atypically flavorful, though.
When all of the food had been consumed, more than she thought appropriate for their number to eat, the other four decided to head to one of their hotels for a quieter, and more private setting so they could discuss things more personal. All but Killua extended the invitation to her, but she declined. So they parted, and Snake took to wandering through the park.
She left the more open, more populated area and found the back trails through the wooded parts. It wasn't quite pure nature, some of the paths being paved, and trash bins around every bend, and people jogging or with strollers passing her. The only animals other than birds and squirrels were the domesticated dogs walking with their owners. There weren't any poisonous plants, either, other than an occasional poison oak.
That's the way society was around here. Strangely habitable to humans.
It wasn't necessarily a bad thing, although it did leave fewer options for Death to find you. She supposed most people saw that as a perk.
But where her mind was truly at was still the advice she was given. Placement seemed to be synonymous to how she used the word role. So that meant she had to find a new role to play, didn't it? Hadn't she already figured that out? What she couldn't figure out was what that role was. No longer a hero, but to just be a villain...maybe that's why he'd talked about justification? She needed a reason to be villainous? But what reason was there? The fact that she loved death did not suffice. That was far too self indulgent for her liking. But then again, weren't villains selfish? But was she selfish?
...she didn't know.
In the end, she left the park and returned to her hotel. She ascended the stairs wondering what selfishness even was, and what degrees of it existed. She supposed it was selfish of her to withhold the antidote when Blight and Ignatius were dying, but rather than self serving, it was more a compulsion than anything. It always had been. Could it be considered selfishness when it was so difficult to control?
She entered her room with the intent on doing some simple exercises while she thought.
That plan swallowed cyanide when she saw the bouquet of flowers on her bed.
Instantly her feet brought her to them, and as she picked them up, her suspicions were confirmed. Every petal as white as her hair, every center a dark, threatening indigo...
They were anemones.
So enraptured by that fact was she that she nearly missed the tag tied to the stems. The moment she noticed she flipped it over and read it. The handwriting was small, neat, and simple.
I'll wait three days.
Gonna be honest, I got lazy and didn't beta read this update. Hope it's okay. We all have those days. But hmm...mysterious flowers, and a note? Hmmm...