The next morning, Elizabeth got up and took a shower. She dressed for the day of shopping that Charlotte, Grace, and Rosie had planned. She needed to find a wedding dress like last week but she hadn't been able to talk herself into going.

As she walked downstairs, she had prepared herself to offer cereal to Jack and the boys but to her surprise, someone had made eggs and sausage.

"Don't worry, sweetie, I didn't make them," Jack said, stepping close to hug her. "Jonah did with direction from Isaac."

"Okay."

"How did you sleep?"

"Good. I think we need to make that massage a nightly thing. It really helped."

"It may have been that or maybe it was the fact that we talked a little about the accident." She stepped away from him and grabbed a plate. "Bee."

"Jack, please don't. I need to get myself in the mindset to go shopping for a dress today. I don't want to talk about the accident."

He leaned back against the counter and crossed his arms. "You need to get in the mindset? Wow."

"Wow what?"

"Well, it sounds like you aren't happy about getting married."

She poured a cup of coffee and stirred milk and sugar into it.

"Well, I guess I have my answer." Jack started to leave but she stopped him.

"Its not fair to put words in my mouth, Jack."

"You said nothing. There were no words."

"Jack, because of what I did, a choice I made, your son could have died. I got hurt too which makes it impossible for me to work, not to mention that I'm going to be at risk for infections for probably the rest of my life. I'm too scared to drive or even sit in that seat and most nights even to sleep and I'm stuck here. I failed in so many ways. So no, forgive me if going shopping with our mothers does not sound like a party to me."

She set her cup down much too hard, splashing hot coffee all over the counter and her hand. She stepped over to the sink and held her hand under the cold water as she tried to hide the tears that poured down her face.

Jack walked up behind her and held her tight. He didn't speak. He just held her as she tried to stop the burning on her hand.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me," she admitted.

"Nothing but you do need to tell your doctor what you're struggling with."

"So he can just give me more medication? No thank you."

"So you just want to feel guilty and be miserable for the rest of your life? Great." He stepped away and sat at the counter. "I think we need to take a step back and make some decisions."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, we are getting married soon, Bee. But you're obviously not ready and I'm certainly not going to force you."

"So what? Postpone?"

"Maybe, I don't know."

The doorbell rang stopping their conversation. "Beth?" Beth dried her hand and went to greet Rosie. "Hey. Ready to go?"

"Um, no. I'm not doing this today."

Rosie saw the tears in her best friend's eyes. "What happened?"

"Still have that guest room available?"

Rosie and Elizabeth drove to the coffee shop and sat down in a booth in the back. "What happened, Beth?"

"I don't know."

"Start from the beginning."

"I don't want to talk about this. Please, tell me about your work. Still busy?"

Rosie headed up to the front of the shop and got them both a cup of coffee and two double chocolate muffins.

When she returned they didn't speak for a bit. But then Rosie couldn't take the silence. "You're my best friend, Beth. I am yours too, last I checked." Elizabeth looked at her in silence. "I'm looking for confirmation here."

"Of course you are."

"We tell each other everything. Why aren't you telling me what's going on?"

"I'm having nightmares."

"About the accident?"

"And panic attacks. Well, I had one."

"Its understandable, Beth. The accident was traumatic."

"It was my fault."

"I thought the garbage truck driver ran a red light."

"I didn't hesitate, Rosie. Because of that, everything changed. Look at Isaac. He's in a wheelchair."

"First, listen to me. Are you listening?"

"Yeah."

"It was not your fault. Not one bit. Stop blaming yourself because it's not true. Second, Isaac is only temporarily in a wheelchair. He will be out as soon as the doctor says his arm is healed enough to use crutches."

"I know but…"

"Third, you need to talk to your doctor. If nothing else, he can give you something to help you sleep."

"Rosie…"

"I'm not done. Fourth, whatever happened this morning between you and Jack, fix it. I have never seen two people more in love and more ready to get married than you. Don't let all these feelings ruin it."

"Is that it?"

"Nope. Fifth, I'm not letting you use my guest room."

"Why not?"

"Because, if I do, I'm helping you shut yourself off from Jack and the boys. You need to go home, talk to Jack and we are going to look for a wedding dress."

"You're bossy."

"Yep and you love it."

Elizabeth smiled. "I do."

Elizabeth walked into the house later that evening, ready to face whatever might happen.

She heard the guys in the kitchen so she headed that direction.

When she walked in, she couldn't help but laugh. Chocolate was everywhere. Eggs, Milk, oil, and chocolate pudding mix or cake mix, she wasn't sure which, was all over the counter. The bowl used to mix said ingredients was sitting on the counter and Jonah and Jack were licking the spoons.

"So, what's going on here?"

They turned and stared at her, guilty looks on their face.

"Isaac said we should make you a cake," Jonah blurted.

"And Dad said it should be chocolate," Isaac mentioned.

"But then I decided cupcakes were the way to go," Jack told her, licking his lips.

She smiled and bent to kiss Isaac's forehead, then Jonah's cheek and finally Jack's lips. "I appreciate the sentiment but please promise me you are going to clean this up."

"We will," he assured her. "How was your day?"

"Good. Can we maybe talk upstairs?"

"Sure."

Jack followed her to the master and shut the door behind them. He watched as she took off her socks and put them in the dirty clothes and slipped into the closet where she apparently changed into his Hidden Lake College t-shirt and a pair of tight black leggings.

Finally, she joined him on the bed, pulling her knees up to her chest. "About this morning," she began. "I'm sorry that I said those things the way I said them."

"Did you mean them?"

"Not all of them."

He took her hand and kissed her palm. "Which did you mean?"

"That I feel guilty about the accident. That I feel like a failure because I'm too scared to even sit in the driver's seat or sometimes even go to sleep. That I feel trapped in my feelings." She wiped her tears and sighed. "But it's just because I'm not used to being so dependent on someone. Even someone I love with all my heart."

He moved closer and wrapped his arms around her. "I wish I knew how to fix how you are feeling. Somehow make you believe it isn't your fault. But I don't know how."

"I don't need you to fix it. I just need your love and your patience, Jack." He leaned his forehead against hers.

"You got it, always."

"And one more thing."

"Name it."

"Will you go with me to the doctor on Wednesday?"

"Of course I will, sweetheart."

"Thank you."

"Now let's go make popcorn and eat cupcakes and watch a movie with the boys."

She nodded. They both stood but before they opened the door, she stood on her toes, giving him a long, slow kiss. "And just so you know, I found the perfect dress today and nothing is going to stop me from becoming your wife."

After the boys went to bed, Jack took out a bowl and two spoons and scooped out some mint chocolate chip ice cream. Then he joined Elizabeth on the couch by the fire.

"Mm, I'm so full, Jack."

"Okay, more for me then," he teased.

"Maybe just a few bites." She turned toward him and sat sideways on the couch and he did the same.

"Tell me about your dress," he said, taking a spoonful.

"Nope. It has to be a surprise, hon."

"No clues at all?"

"Nope. You and Lee and the boys need to go buy new suits. Navy blue, white shirt, blush ties."

"Got it." He took another bite. "Can I ask you something, Bee?"

"Yeah."

"When you left this morning, you seemed like...I mean...I was worried you weren't coming back."

"I was angry and the thought crossed my mind to stay with Rosie until the wedding. But she talked some sense into me."

"What did she say?"

"That whatever happened between us, I needed to fix it because we belong together."

Jack leaned forward and kissed her icy, minty lips. "We do, Bee."

"I know I guess I just needed my bossy best friend to tell me that."

"Bee, will you promise me something?"

"What?"

"That when you get angry at me or the boys, that you'll never leave? I need to know that whatever the problem is, you will talk to me about it."

"I'm so sorry. Yes, I promise."

"The boys need their mother and they need her to stay around."

"I promise, Jack."

"Okay."

She gave him a kiss and smiled. "I love you. I'm going to bed, alright?"

"Alright. Love you too."

On Wednesday, Jack took Beth to the doctor's office and sat with her in the waiting room.

"Beth Thatcher?" the nurse called from the doorway.

She stood and looked at him. "Will you come in?"

"Of course I will."

He took her hand and they walked together into the examination room.

Jack watched and listened as the doctor examined her incision and asked questions.

"Elizabeth, do you have any questions or concerns?"

"Yes. A few. Will it be safe for us to become pregnant?"

"How soon are we talking?"

"We are getting married on March 31st."

"By that point, it will be safe from a medical standpoint. I'd like you to talk with your OBGYN as well."

Jack squeezed her hand and nodded. "I've been struggling lately."

The doctor put his clipboard down and turned toward her. "Go on."

"I've been having nightmares and I had a panic attack."

"How often are you having nightmares?"

"Almost every night."

"Are they always about the accident?"

"Yes."

"And the panic attack?"

"I was in an SUV. Jack wanted me to see if I might want to buy it so I was just sitting in the driver's seat. I could feel it closing in on me. I could smell the burning and...I could feel the pain…" She closed her eyes and tried to calm her heart. "Its my fault. I know it's my fault."

"Doc, do you have any ideas on how to help her? We've assured her that it wasn't her fault but she feels that way. I don't know what to do."

"I'm assuming that if you're looking to get pregnant sooner rather than later, that you'd rather do this without medication."

"Yes," Elizabeth confirmed.

He took out a business card and handed it to her. "I'm going to schedule an appointment with my good friend and colleague, Abigail Stanton. She's a family therapist and has some good experience with PTSD cases. I think you'll like her."

"A therapist?"

"Yes. I think it's the best place to start."

"Alright."

On their drive home, it dawned on her. "I bet she's related to Raylinn."

"I think it's her mom. Jonah mentioned that she was a doctor, just not what type."

Elizabeth took Jack's hand and sighed. "Thank you for going with me, Jack."

"I'll go anywhere with you."

She nodded and closed her eyes, sending up a prayer for the many blessings in her life. One of the many was the endlessly supportive man whose hand she was holding.