Chapter 23
"Good morning, Baby Sis." I kiss her cheek as I enter. "Where's that husband of yours?"
"He's supposed to be at the hardware store, picking up primer for the walls."
"Supposed to be, huh? Where's Josh, and what's that shit you're wearing on your head?" I joke.
"Josh is with Jasper, I'm sure at the damned toy store instead of doing what he's supposed to be doing, and this…." she gestures to her head angrily, 'this' is what's going to keep the paint out of my hair."
I walk through the living room, and she's right behind me. I feel…happier today; like I'm on cloud fucking nine or something. It's been two days since Bella and I have seen or talked to each other, but we're in a good place. I want to see her badly, but fight the urge to just pop in on her at any time I feel like it. I keep reminding myself that I need to take it slowly.
My sister is still scowling at me.
"Are you angry at me about something?"
"You do know why you're here today, don't you, Edward?"
"To help you paint the attic." I shove my hands into my pockets and rock back on my heels. I survey work that Jasper has put into the house. He really has worked hard to give Alice her dream home.
"If you know that you're helping me paint today, then why are you dressed like that? And stop that damned whistling, it's driving me nuts!".
It's now my turn to scowl at her. She's in a mood, and something tells me it's not just about Jasper, primer or the toy store.
"What's going on with you? You seem on edge."
"Nothing is going on with me. I just want to get this room painted. It's been weeks; and now, when I finally get Jasper to agree to do it, he drags his feet. I swear when he gets back I'm going to castrate him!" She leaves me in the living room and stomps up the stairs. I feel sorry for Jasper once he gets back.
As if on cue, he walks through the door with Josh on his shoulders. I can tell from the bags they're carrying, that they've been to both the hardware and toy stores. Alice was right.
"Boy, are you in trouble," I warn as he notices me.
"Damn it! What did I do now?" he sighs.
"Hi, Uncwle Edward!" Josh runs to me as soon as Jasper lets him down.
"Hey, buddy! How are you?"`
"Fwine! I gotta show mommy the new toy daddy bwought me. Bye!" He gives me a quick hug and runs up the stairs with his toy in hand.
"What's this about trouble?" Jasper worriedly asks as he pulls cans from the bag.
"I don't know." I shrug. "But if I were you, I'd plan on wearing a protective cup."
"A what? Why?" He asks in alarm.
"Something about castration."
He visibly winces.
"Christ, I really don't know what her problem is these days. She's snippy and unhappy; crying over nothing all the time."
"Sounds like she could be pregnant," I joke and wait for the denial. He just stares at me, then turns to read the directions on the paint can.
"She's pregnant?" I whisper so only the two of us will hear.
"I don't know…I think that she may be. I haven't mentioned my suspicions to her, and I'm actually kind of surprised she hasn't said anything. The only thing she's been on about; is how much we need to get the damned attic painted."
"Jasper and Edward! This attic isn't going to paint itself!" she yells from two floors up. We share a look of trepidation and make our way upstairs.
Alice's mood seems to change once she's satisfied with the progress we've made. Jasper, Josh, and I have painted until we're exhausted. Alice makes sandwiches, and we all stop for a lunch break.
"The room looks good guys. I'm really impressed." She hands out cans of soda. "I may just have the three of you paint the room down the hall from our bedroom. I'm thinking of turning it into office space."
"Oh no, more pwainting! Mommy I don't want to pwaint. I'm twired!" Josh whines.
"Office space," I scoff. "The two of you had better think about turning that room into a nursery," I whisper over to Jasper. Alice looks up, and he quickly silences me.
"Do you have something to say, dear brother?"
"I said…." Jasper shakes his head vigorously. He should feel lucky that I don't feel like quarreling with my sister today.
"I said I'm done with painting for the day," I lie. "I have plans for later."
"Would those plans include a mysterious auburn-haired beauty we have yet to meet?"
Fucking Emmett.
I smile enigmatically. Now is not the time to talk about my newfound relationship. It's still too fresh, and I'm just not comfortable with discussing it with anyone other than Bella yet.
"Hey Josh, what do you say we go to the park on Friday?"
"Yay! Can we go to the one wif the weally big jungwle gywm?" he gasps with excitement.
"Yup, that's the one."
"Yaaaay! Mommy, daddy, can I?"
Jasper and Alice both give their approval, and Josh nearly splits his face, he's smiling so widely. I can't wait to be an uncle again.
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.
.
It's nearing seven p.m., and I'm ready to leave. I slip off to call Bella. She answers on the first ring.
Someone's misses me too.
"Hey you."
"Hi." She answers nonchalantly, but I can hear the happiness in her voice.
"How are you? I haven't spoken to you in a while."
"I'm okay. I've just been busy."
"What about tonight? Are you busy, I mean?"
"I don't have anything planned. I'm just going to catch up on some reading and probably watch some TV, nothing special." She sounds so relaxed, and I picture her curled up on the sofa in sweats.
"What do you say we make good on those date plans we discussed?"
"Date plans?"
"You remember…a quiet dinner, a movie, on your territory."
"Oh…right…that."
I'm wait nervously, sensing her hesitation. Maybe it's too soon.
"Tonight will be fine."
Now I'm smiling like an idiot, I'm elated that she's agreed to spend time with me.
"Okay. I'll see you in about an hour?" I check my watch.
"An hour's fine. See you soon."
"All right. Soon." I whisper.
"Edward?"
"Yes?"
"I like Seafood." She ends the call.
My mind mentally scrabbles, trying to figure out where to get the best seafood in town. At times like these I wish I paid more attention when listening to Alice and Mom recite to restaurant reviews. I grab my keys and rejoin Jasper and Alice. They're canoodling on the couch.
"Stop that you two. Where can I get delicious seafood? And preferably not too far from here?" I rush out.
"What's your rush?" Jasper wiggles his brows.
"You want it fresh or cooked?" Alice asks.
I ignore Jasper. "You know I can't cook! I meant a good seafood restaurant that does take-out."
"Oh, well, there's a really elegant place about ten minutes from here called Voltaire. The cuisine is exquisite, and they do great seafood."
"Voltaire? Sounds Russian." I frown.
"Voltaire is actually a French name, Edward." Jasper educates me.
"Whatever, as long as they serve seafood. Thanks for the info. I'll see you guys later." I head for the door and turn to them, almost forgetting.
"Tell Josh I'll be by to pick him up at noon on Friday."
.
.
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I arrive at Bella's apartment with the requested seafood dinner. The wonderful aroma emanating from the bags is making me salivate.
She buzzes me into the lobby and, and I hurriedly make my way up to her apartment and lightly push the doorbell. She answers looking stunning; fresh-faced and hair flowing. I my earlier fantasizing wasn't too far off, instead of sweats she's wearing a royal blue, figure hugging workout suit of some sort.
"Wow…you look…."
"It's just leisure wear. I figured…" She fidgets nervously.
"You look perfect," I quickly reassure her, and she does …look perfect. She is perfect.
"Thank you. Come in." I glance around the apartment, and I'm impressed. It's a really nice place, contemporary furniture with classic lines; warm, muted color tones giving off an overall effect of serenity and comfortable elegance. Her home reflects her personality, generous of spirit, with aesthetic beauty.
"What do you have there?" She tries to peek into the bags.
"This is dinner," I laugh.
"It smells incredible.
"Well, I think I held up my end so far with providing good food. Um…movie wise, I guess we can select something from my Netflix account. Although, I should tell you I hardly ever use the damn thing. I don't even recall setting it up. Probably wouldn't have at all if it weren't for my brother and his inane need to binge watch programs while visiting my house."
"It's alright, we can utilize mine, binge watching goes on an awful lot over here, "she laughs, reaching for remote. "Ah, here we are. A little Sex, Lies and Videotape, Dr. Masen?" She asks, quirking an eyebrow. My lips purse, which causes her to laugh.
"I'm sorry, I couldn't resist," she slightly dials back her humor when she sees my expression. I know she's teasing, and I give her a smirk to show that the comment hasn't bothered me.
She takes one of the bags from my arms and leads me into the kitchen. I suddenly realize that I didn't bring anything to drink.
"Damn it!"
"What's wrong?"
"I just realized I didn't bring anything to drink. I'll make a quick run to the store." I place the bag on the counter and reach for my keys.
"I have plenty here. There's no need to make an unnecessary trip. Plates are in the cabinet, silverware in the drawer."
I grab two plates and some silverware; open the containers and spoon food onto the plates. I hope what I've chosen will please her. I want this evening to go well.
"I have red and white wine, the white is chilled, and I also have some beer, water and soda in the fridge…. some iced tea…"
"Um…beer works." She walks to the refrigerator and takes out two Coronas.
"Mmm. That smells really good." She peeks over my shoulder and breathes in the aroma.
"Yes, it does. The waitress swore that we'd love this. It's sautéed soft-shell crab and rock lobster twice baked soufflé. It comes with garden salads and a sourdough loaf that I'm supposed to warm."
She quickly takes the bread and places it in the oven, then helps me to carry the rest of the food into the living room. Our dinner is obviously going to be a little more intimate than I'd expected. It seems we're going to be eating on the sofa in front of the television.
"Is this okay?" she gestures.
"As long as it's okay with you, it's okay with me." She gives me a sweet smile and returns to the kitchen for the bread.
"Shall we eat?" She sits wonderfully close to me and we dig into our meals.
"Mmmm. This is..." The doorbell chimes loudly. "That must be one of my neighbors. I'll be right back, please eat, it will get cold otherwise."
Silently, I praise my sister for recommending Voltaire's, after I taste the delicious lobster soufflé. I'll certainly be making a return visit to their establishment. Maybe Bella will accompany me on night out next time.
Suddenly, I hear her raise her voice, it's not loud enough for me to discern what's being said, but she clearly sounds agitated. I hope she's not having trouble with a neighbor. I move closer, in case she needs my help. The front door is open, and I glimpse Bella in the hallway. I can't see the person she's talking to, but it's definitely a male, and he sounds agitated.
I hear Bella telling him to leave over and over again.
"We're done, Jake. You ended us when you consciously made the decision to be unfaithful. And please stop imposing on my neighbors to let you up here. I intend to notify everyone in this building not to let you in again. Please leave now." She sounds determined and angry
Jacob.
I choose not to inject myself into the situation, it seems as if she has matters under control, besides it's their business, not mine. But I can't resist eavesdropping. My heart thuds as I consider the possibility of her taking him back.
"I did not sleep with Tanya in Florida, Bella! My God, why won't you believe me!"
"It doesn't matter, Jacob. None of it does. The truth is that I'm not enough for you. I refuse to be in a relationship with a man who doesn't think I'm worthy enough to remain faithful to. Now please leave."
"No! I'm not going anywhere…not until you listen to me."
"Let go of my arm, Jacob, or we're going to have a problem."
"I'm not letting you go, Bella. I love you!"
I've heard enough; he's here without her consent and touching her against her will. I move to stand behind her. She gasps, and his eyes widen.
"Let her go," I say calmly.
"You? W-what the hell are you…" He glances back and forth between Bella and me. His expression quickly morphs from confusion to rage.
"What the hell is going on here?"
Bella manages to rip her arm away from him and takes a step back.
"I don't owe you any explanations, Jacob Black. Now, I want you off my property! Go!"
"Are you seeing this guy? No…I know you can't be." He laughs sardonically. He turns his back and places a hand on his forehead.
Bella and I exchange a look, but remain silent. I'm tempted to say and do plenty, but I exercise restraint. I need to respect Bella and the prospect of our growing relationship.
"I cannot believe that you are preaching to me about fidelity, and here you are hooking up with the biggest sleaze in Chicago! Yes, I know all about this guy, Bella, so don't bother defending him."
Bella is livid now.
"I'm not going to ask you again to leave, Jacob."
"You know, I should've known." He spins around to face us. "That whole bidding war in Florida was the beginning of this, wasn't it? I could tell then that he wanted you. I must've looked like an idiot to you the whole time."
"No more of an idiot than I looked when I walked in on you and Tanya in our hotel room; the same hotel room where you proposed to me to less than twenty-four hours earlier!" Bella retorts then throws up her hands and turns to walk back inside. Jacob grabs hold of her arm and pulls her back.
"Hey!" I snap. "I told you to let go of her."
"Edward, it's okay. Just…just wait inside for me."
"Look, man, from what I hear, you have your own shit to deal with. Bella is my business. So, back off."
"Excuse me?" Bella whirls around in shock
"Is that right?" I step up to him.
"That's right." He advances. "How's therapy going?" He sneers, and even though I know that he has no idea what Bella and I have discussed during our sessions, the last thread of my restraint snaps.
"You don't want to do this with me, Man. Trust me."
"Is that a threat? Am I supposed to be afraid?"
"It's not a threat, and you don't have to be afraid, but if you grab her like that again…well, like she said, we're going to have a problem."
I'm breathing roughly as we stand eye to eye. He glances over at Bella, who remains silent, and I wonder what's going through her mind at seeing me like this again.
"Oh really? What are you gonna do, tough guy?" He shoves me in the chest, but I barely budge.
"Don't touch me again. I'm warning you."
He gives me another shove, and I grip him by the collar.
"You're a slow learner. I told you not to touch me again!" Bella moves swiftly to defuse the situation.
"Okay, that's enough…Jake, go. Now."
He can't leave even if he chose to because I'm practically throttling him.
"Edward?" Bella pleads with me and tries to pry my hands free. My attention is squarely on him, but I can feel her hand on my wrist, and I lessen my grip.
I shove him away roughly, and he stumbles a bit as he straightens his collar. We glare at each other murderously.
Jacob backs away, never taking his eyes off Bella, I keep mine locked on him. He backs down the hallway until he reaches the elevator. I shut my eyes and take a deep breath to get myself under control. I turn to Bella, who doesn't look happy at all.
"I'm sorry." I apologize gruffly and realize how harsh my voice sounds; my residual anger is not directed at her. She crosses her arms and looks away.
Reluctantly, I step inside the apartment.
"I'll just get my keys and wallet. Enjoy dinner; the soufflé is really good.
"Don't go." She reaches for my hand. I glance at it briefly then accept the gesture, as she leads me back over to the sofa.
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.
.
We have dinner after all, even though the food has gone cold and is somewhat ruined. I was convinced, after my altercation with Jacob, that she'd want nothing to do with me. I've never been so grateful to be wrong.
"So, has he been harassing you?"
"No…no, nothing like that. Jake just feels like I'm not treating the situation fairly. He thinks I'm too eager to just walk away and not fight for everything we'd built."
"How long were you together?"
"Over five years. We met in college and had a pretty much on and off, relationship for a short while but, really, we've been exclusive for about five. Well, I assumed that we were, until I found him with another woman."
I nod, recalling the sordid details from when we were in Miami, so I decide not to make her relive them.
"Did you enjoy the food?"
"Yes, I did. It was amazing. Thank you."
She scoots into the corner of the couch to get comfortable, and for some odd reason I feel anxious, even this small act of retreating from me, fills me with an unreasonable fear. This feeling is new to me, and I'm not sure what to make of it.
I'm sitting on the edge of the sofa, fiddling with my beer bottle and looking anywhere but at her as I try to regain control of my emotions.
"Mind if a switch to something different?"
"No, I don't mind," she says softly and smiles.
Bella and I are now sitting close, swept up in Titanic; well, she's swept up in looking at the DiCaprio guy, and I'm caught up in the way her bare foot absentmindedly brushes against my thigh. It's an innocent act, but it's stirring something in me. Her skin looks so smooth, even there. My hand twitches, I want to caress that foot.
I clear my throat and adjust my position.
"Are you all right?"
"I'm good."
"I thought this is your favorite movie." She teases.
"It is my favorite movie." I reluctantly turn my attention to the screen.
The love scene in the car is playing out, and Bella fidgets. I can't focus on the movie any longer.
I gently tuck a lock of her hair behind her ear and run my hand down to back of her neck. She turns to me, and my God, she's so beautiful, all I can think of is that she looks as if she wants me to kiss her. I hesitate, remembering that she wants to take this slowly, and I want to prove to her that it's not just about a physical connection with me. To my surprise she leans in, she doesn't kiss me, she simply closes her eyes and presses her forehead to mine.
"Nothing is ever easy with you," she whispers. I slide my hand to gently grip her neck. She finally captures my lips with hers, and my body erupts in warmth that starts from the center of my chest and rapidly spreads to every part.
Her tongue touches mine, and I burn for more. I pull her across me to straddle my lap. We moan as the intimate parts of our bodies make contact. I know that she feels my desire for her, hard and throbbing. I feel her too, moist heat, an accelerant on the fire already burning in me. It's a fierce battle of mind over matter, to resist the desire to fit my fingers into the top of those pants and slowly drag them down.
She rakes her fingers through my hair, gently tugging as she kisses me passionately. My hips, seemingly have developed a mind of their own and thrust rhythmically, emulating the movement of our tongues.
Bella emits a breathless whimper; her lips remain locked with mine. My hand slides up the back of her sweater. She's not wearing a bra, and I revel in the naked, silkiness of her skin.
"You feel so good." I murmur against her mouth.
She pulls back and looks at me; the emotion in her eyes sends a tremor through my erection. She feels it and squirms.
"I'm inviting you in, Edward." The enormity of her words leaves me momentarily speechless.
"Are you sure?" I finally murmur, as I gently run my fingers through her hair. I stare deeply into her eyes, testing her sincerity.
She climbs off me and switches the television off. She tugs me up from the couch and leads me toward the stairs. She turns to kiss me again, softly this time. My mind races at the thought of all the things I want to do to her, with her.
"I want you so much," I whisper.
"Show me." She pulls me up the stairs. I stop, and she frowns. "What's wrong?"
"We can't, Bella." It's as if my body is turning on me, vehemently protesting my stupidity. If certain, aching parts of it could speak; it would be hurling invectives at my stupid brain.
Bella looks crushed. "Um…okay." She looks away from me.
"Bella…it's not you."
"Famous words."
"It's not like that…Bella…" I struggle to explain.
"It would be so easy for me to just do this, Bella."
"Obviously not." She says and looks down abjectly. I gently pull her chin up and tilt it back up so she can see me.
"What I mean is…you know my past, but I want so much to show you that I can be different. I want to show you that I'm worthy of being in your bed, making love to you, waking up next to you. And hopefully, cook you breakfast to show you how much it all means to me."
"You don't cook."
"I can make an omelet."
She smiles weakly, but the sense of rejection is still evident.
I pull her close and wrap my arms around her. "I know you feel how much I want you."
"It's a natural reaction, Edward. I'm sure you have it quite regularly."
"Not like this. Not like when I'm with you. It's true, Bella, no woman has ever made me feel the way you do."
I tilt her chin and lean down to kiss her, deeply, passionately, like a condemned man gaining a reprieve. I feel her shudder in my arms, and I intensify the kiss, until we both need to come up to breathe. I rest my forehead to hers as we both struggle to regain control.
"Next time nothing will stop me. I promise you that. See me to the door?"
She nods and takes my hand. I open the door and step across the threshold. I turn to her, she is the most delectable, desirable woman I've ever seen, hair tousled, her already pouty lips even more swollen, swollen from kissing me, I did that to her. Her wide, expressive eyes are still clouded by desire, for me. God, what fool would walk away from this, I fight the overwhelming urge to have her right up against this door, but some things are more important. She's more important to me. I must exercise the things that she's worthy of. Patience. Respect. Love.
"This is twice that you've rejected me." She bravely jokes.
"This is not rejection. This is patience." I reach up to caress her cheek. "It's actually quite refreshing to court you."
"Court?" She giggles.
"Yes, and I'm going to do it diligently." I lean in and place a lingering kiss on her cheek. "Have a good night. I'll call you tomorrow."
I caress her cheek one last time before I close the door behind me.
I lean up against her door, and I shake my head, mentally berating myself. I need my head examined.
"Fuck! I really need to look into finding myself another shrink."