Free Time Events: Nobuhiro Higurashi (Side C)

EVENT 1: While I haven't talked with Higurashi-san all that much, I do understand that he's an upstanding and honorable young man. Then again, I sometimes wonder why he chose me to work under him.

Higurashi-san and I decided to sit down and talk. While we'd worked somewhat closely as leaders of the student body, we hadn't talked about ourselves all that much. He'd told me about his service on the student council of his old school, as well as the girl he'd helped win the presidency, but little else.

"I'm curious, Nagato-san," Higurashi-san said. "Were you at all involved with the student council at your old school?"

"They did occasionally ask me for help with the computers," I said, "but no, I was not an official member."

"I see," Higurashi-san said. "Why's that?"

My first idea was to ask, "Because only a handful of students out of the hundreds at the school join the student council?" but then I realized that, while true, it wouldn't answer his question.

"Because they didn't have a job for me," I said. "If you don't have what it takes to win the presidency, you can only get a job by currying favor with the president, or being so well-recognized for your aptitude for a certain student council officer job- vice president, treasurer, secretary, et cetera- that they'd take notice of you. Didn't you say that was the case for you?"

"I did," Higurashi-san said. "I got to know Izumi-senpai before she officially announced her campaign, and then was able to demonstrate my skill at public speaking to show that I wasn't all talk, no pun intended. After that, she was more than willing to have me work with her. Did you have any such opportunities to prove yourself?"

I shook my head.

"Not at all," I said. "I once asked my student council president about whether she had any permanent positions available for someone like me, and she said no. She said there were many applicants for each of the student council officer positions, so she had to turn many qualified candidates away. As a first-year, I had the option of helping out by doing chores and learning the internal workings of the student council, but there was no guarantee that she'd have a job."

"That's unfortunate," Higurashi-san said. "One would think that she would have made you the official tech support person of the student council. It's not as though she'd have to pay you."

"I know," I said, "but when multiple people- several, dozens or even hundreds- apply for one position, the hiring manager has to choose who's best. It's a harsh decision, but also the way to make sure that the best qualified person gets hired."

"You have a point," Higurashi-san said. "That's part of the reason why I am glad for the existence of rival candidates for leadership, even if they are opponents I must defeat. Democratic governments run best when people choose the candidate they think is best, instead of one candidate winning by default."

I sighed.

"Unfortunately, I think we both know how I got my position as your second-in-command," I said. "There wasn't anyone better out there to compete with me, was there?"

"Maybe not, Nagato-san," Higurashi-san said, "but you've proven a loyal and dependable partner. I'd recommend you to Izumi-senpai if we went to the same school, and she'd probably have taken you on."

"I'm glad you think so," I said. "There aren't many people who'd have much confidence in my skills."

I thought back to how many people had expressed doubts in Higurashi-san's leadership- six people, some of whom weren't with us anymore. While not all of them were the most pleasant individuals, they hadn't been wrong to doubt whether Higurashi-san and I could lead us well in a situation like this, in which death and betrayal were all too common. That said, I trusted Higurashi-san, and hoped that by following his lead, we would be able to work toward a common goal, rather than turn on each other.

EVENT 2: At my request, Higurashi-san is giving me lessons on how to speak. He believes that it is important to speak eloquently in order to convince people to listen to what you have to say.

At my request, Higurashi-san gave me some lessons on how to speak in front of others. These included how to speak clearly to others, and how to stay calm when addressing large groups of people. After a little while, he finally decided to ask me about why I'd sought him out.

"If you don't mind my asking, Nagato-san," Higurashi-san said, "what led you to seek my help for speaking?"

"The class trials," I said. "I want to be able to speak well enough to convince the others to accept what I'm saying. I know it's difficult to unquestioningly trust anyone in these trials, and I may not always be right, but I want to help people, and that requires convincing them that my intentions are good."

That's a noble goal," Higurashi-san said, "and one that I'm willing to support. There's little more tragic than a good idea being rejected because it isn't convincing enough. I don't mean to brag, but if Izumi-senpai hadn't gotten some help with public speaking, she most likely would never have been elected."

"It's good that she did," I said. "I'm glad you were able to help Izumi-san."

Higurashi nodded, but didn't seem completely happy about what was probably his proudest moment.

"So am I," Higurashi said, "but the experience illustrates the power of communication. A politician who genuinely wants to make the world a better place won't get anywhere without the support of the electorate or the rest of the government, whereas a self-serving politician can get elected by using honeyed words to trick voters into giving their support."

"That sounds like something Karita-san would say," I said.

"He certainly would," Higurashi-san said, "but whereas Karita-kun cynically believes that goes to show how easily people can be deceived and manipulated, I simply believe that it means that those who fight for truth and justice must choose their words well. Mihama-san was quite eloquent, so I believe that she could have become an excellent lawyer, and Azuki-san's gift for acting could have served her well in other occupations."

I nodded sadly, thinking about our lost friends, as well as their unrealized potential and the loved ones they left behind.

"I know," I said. "All I want to do is make sure no one else will suffer their fate. That's probably too much to ask for, though, so if another murder does happen, I'd like to ensure that the spotless survive."

"A good goal, Nagato-san," Higurashi-san said. "Because I trust you, please allow me to do what I can to help you achieve that."

While Higurashi-san was all too aware of how oratory skills could be used to deceive people, by choosing to teach his skills to me, he expressed his hope that I would use them well. In return, I would devote myself to learning what he had to teach me, and making the most of it.

EVENT 3: Higurashi-san has always struggled with public speaking. These past few days have only made him more aware of his shortcomings.

Higurashi-san gave me some more public speaking lessons, only for me to end up tripping over my own words. Evidently noticing I was having trouble, he decided to have us take a break.

"I'm sorry I'm not doing very well today, Higurashi-san," I said.

"It's perfectly fine, Nagato-san," Higurashi-san said. "Everyone has trouble with public speaking from time to time, and I'm no exception."

I couldn't help but think that statement sounded like a platitude coming from the Ultimate Public Speaker, so I was hesitant to take it at face value.

"Let me guess," I said. "You're going to tell me that you used to have trouble speaking in front of people?"

"You're partly right," Higurashi-san said. "I still do. I've always been nervous about speaking in front of others, and that hasn't changed."

I was speechless for a moment.

"Really?" I said. "You don't seem like you're having trouble."

"Appearances can be deceiving," Higurashi-san said. "Fear isn't an emotion that can be conquered; it must be controlled. Azuki-san probably knew that, too, and was able to keep her stage fright in check whenever she performed."

I nodded, and thought back to the last one-on-one conversation I'd had with Akira-san before her death, when she'd told me that she'd been scared, too. She'd felt that terror even more intensely during her final minutes, but kept it in check so we wouldn't be troubled by her passing.

"I'm sure she did," I said, "but while I'm not an expert on Talent High School, I doubt they would be interested in someone who once had trouble."

"I actually admitted my troubles to the person who scouted me," Higurashi-san said, "and he said it wasn't a problem. In fact, he was impressed by how much I'd improved."

"I would be, too," I said, "especially since I'm still not on your level."

Higurashi-san remained silent for a moment, until his face lit up.

"You know, I just remembered what he told me," Higurashi-san said. "He said that all of us begin with nothing and what matters is how much we ultimately make of ourselves. To use an example, Kumakura-kun wasn't always very strong, but became the Ultimate Weightlifter through hard work."

The thought was encouraging, but also depressing. Compared to the Ultimates, who'd mastered their skills, what had I made of my own life?

"You're right," I said. "I wonder what that says about the people who struggle with the lightest possible weights in the gym, though."

"It's possible their strengths lie elsewhere," Higurashi-san said. "After all, there are many poor athletes who are excellent students, and vice versa."

"Perhaps," I said, "but many people never accomplish anything significant in their entire lives."

"Indeed," Higurashi-san said, "and the Ultimates are no exeptions."

Higurashi-san decided to resume our practice before I could ask him about it, but we didn't get far before he decided to call it a day. It was clear, however, that while I was probably the only Ultimate who didn't deserve her title, I was not the only one who considered herself a failure- not when Higurashi-san felt the same way.

EVENT 4: Higurashi-san wonders if he's a failure. It's hard to put a positive spin on what we've accomplished in the killing game, but we can't give up, either.

I met up with Higurashi-san, who told me he wasn't in the mood for speech lessons.

"Is something the matter, Higurashi-san?" I said.

"I'm concerned about something, Nagato-san," Higurashi-san said. "You can correct me if I'm wrong, but I have noticed that you seem to be placing me on a pedestal."

"You aren't wrong about that," I said, "but it's not just you. Everyone else here, even Asakura, who has the same talent as I do, seems impressive compared to me."

Higurashi-san shook his head.

"Well, I can't speak for the rest of us," Higurashi-san said, "but I'm hardly admirable. Ever since the killing game started, I've become painfully aware that public speaking is my only strong suit, and there is no substance behind my words. I could convince the admissions committee to let me attend the school, but only because they made it clear what I would need to say. Here, I don't know what, if anything, I can say to convince the others not to give in to the temptation of the killing game."

"Neither do I," I said, "but you also chose to do something about it. You believed that we didn't have to kill each other, and that there was some other way for us to survive without sacrificing our classmates."

"Perhaps," Higurashi-san said, "but the killing game ended up happening anyway. Azuki-san had little faith in me, and she was right."

"That may be so," I said, "but it takes a certain quality to be able to appeal to others. As much as Akira-san disagreed with you, she knew she couldn't serve well as a leader. She was capable of pointing out the harsh truth, but even if she managed to convince everyone to accept that, she didn't have the ability to get the others to follow her on anything that wasn't a class trial."

I always thought of Akira-san as someone who did what she thought was best while paying no attention to what others thought, but that probably wasn't entirely true. Not only were her deductions in the class trials only useful if she was able to convince the rest of us to vote with her, but she also had to appeal to the public as an actress. Much of her success came from being good at her job, but she also had to appeal to others, something that her mother probably helped her with when it came to showbiz. Of course, she didn't see much point in winning over people who disliked her, especially when the feeling was mutual, so it wasn't hard to see why she wasn't much of a leader.

"You're right about that," Higurashi-san said, "but even if I am doing better than Azuki-san would have, I am still nowhere near satisfied with how things turned out."

"It's only natural that you'd feel that way," I said, "since anyone who cares about protecting others would be disappointed at having failed them. The shame of failure should be an impetus for you to try even harder next time."

"It is," Higurashi-san said, "but what about those who have died? There's nothing we can do to bring them back, or fully make up for our failure. I doubt they would be happy that all we can do is simply try harder."

"I don't think, so, either," I said, "but that's all we can do for them. I'm sure that none of the dead victims would want anyone else to suffer their fates, and that few of the executed killers would want anyone to repeat their mistakes. For their sake, we simply need to do better."

"Then that's what we should do," Higurashi-san said. "Thank you for reminding me of this."

While we'd often thought of the dead as a testament to how much we'd failed, it was only because we'd convicted each of the killers and sacrificed them that we were still alive. In a way, we owed them our lives, so we owed it to them and ourselves to try to do better, even if we didn't know how.

EVENT 5: Higurashi-san trusts me as his partner, and hopes I will carry on his work should anything happen to him.

Higurashi-san invited me to his cabin, where he held one final lesson. After I delivered my speech, he gave me a round of applause.

"Congratulations, Nagato-san," Higurashi-san said. "You've learned all you can from me."

"Thank you very much, Higurashi-sensei," I said, "but I'm still nowhere near your level. That's due to my limitations as a student rather than yours as a teacher."

"You flatter me," Higurashi-san said, "but if you still believe there's a gap between us, it's one that you'll have to close by refining your technique on your own. Teachers merely teach the fundamentals; the students make those teachings their own."

To me, it sounded as though Higurashi-san had found his answer to his struggles as a leader. He didn't have the solution yet, but he'd continue searching for it anyway, and I'd do everything I could to assist him.

"That may be true," I said, "but I'm not sure what I'd do without you, if I end up having to succeed you as leader."

"I hope you never have to," Higurashi-san said, "but should it happen, I'm sure you'll do right by our classmates and save as many as you can. You are Nagato-sensei's daughter, after all, as well as the girl who's been by my side this entire time. I'm glad I chose you to lead this class with me."

"I appreciate hearing that," I said, "but since I respect you and enjoy working under- no, alongside- you, I'm not ready to go solo just yet."

"I know," Higurashi-san said, "so believe me when I say that I won't throw my life away. Let's continue leading this class as long as we can, together."

Even though I knew that Higurashi-san couldn't necessarily keep this promise, I believed that he was being honest when he made it, as he'd always been. There were few people I trusted more than him, so I desperately hoped he could escape from this killing game with me and with as many of our classmates as possible.

Author's Notes

This FTE chain mainly deals with one theme in this fic- belief in yourself isn't always enough, and sometimes, you need talent and skill to accomplish your goals. It also explores the Higurashi-Chiyuri partnership.