Rose had no idea how long she'd been standing outside the TARDIS, leaning up against the blue doors, when Mickey came panting around the corner. He was talking, but she wasn't really hearing him. She wasn't really hearing anything aside from the ringing in her ears and the pounding of her heart.
He sent her away. A small part of her raged at that because how dare he! How dare the Doctor send her away. But the bigger part of her hurt. Hurt for him because he was about to face his oldest enemy, and he clearly didn't think it was going to go to plan because he'd kept a promise to bring her home. He sent her and the TARDIS away. He was so alone now, with nothing humming against his mind, no human to connect with, not like he was with her.
"My last thoughts will be of you."
The words seemed to take their time sinking in, but once they had, Rose wailed, first burying her face in her hands before she realized Mickey had pulled her into an embrace. She grabbed on to his coat and held hard, sobbing as he swayed her from side to side for a bit.
She never deserved Mickey. She knows that, she knows he deserved better. Here he was, holding her and trying to soothe her when the man she loves more than anything or anyone else had sent her away to live, all after she'd broken his heart.
"Let's get you to your mum," he said, some of the only words of his that got through to her.
~DW~
"What's happened?" Jackie asked as soon as they were through the doors, Rose still sobbing, her face red and swollen.
"TARDIS landed not far from here," Mickey explained as he gently guided Rose into Jackie's arms. She moved as if on auto pilot, didn't move or do anything that indicated she was aware of being handed off. Of her being home, of anything. "Doctor's not with her." He said gravely, because this is what it had to be about, right? Why else would Rose be this distraught, alone here with the TARDIS, if the Doctor hadn't….
Jackie's eyes went wide, and she looked at her daughter held in her arms, with a heartbreakingly sympathetic look.
"S'alright, love." She murmured. "Come on, let's get you rested up, yeah?"
Jackie turned Rose and led her down the hall, to her old room, and Mickey stood in the entryway and waited. He considered maybe calling UNIT, letting Kate know that the Doctor wouldn't be coming back anytime soon, but decided against it. He liked to think that Rose could give an explanation that wasn't dire, the worst case. Like maybe they got into a big row, and the Doctor just brought her back and didn't want to say anything until it passed. Or maybe he sent her back because he was jailed somewhere, that seemed likely.
Until he knew for sure, he wouldn't say anything. He'd wait for Rose. In the meantime, he'll go put the kettle on.
~DW~
He worked with robot-like focus for some time, trying not to think of what he'd just done. His mind, if he let himself focus on it, was emptier than it had been in his very long life. He may go insane if he paid it much attention, and that wouldn't do until he got the wave ready to at least annihilate everything.
"Rose," Jack's voice but through the intercom. "I've called up the internal laser codes. There should be a different number on every screen, can you read them out."
"She can't." The Doctor replied, "But if you'll give me a moment, I can do it quickly."
"Where is she then?" Jack asked.
The Doctor took a moment to swallow back the hearts ache. "Home." She replied.
There was silence for a moment, and then. "You sent her back." It was a statement, and one that didn't give even a hint of disapproval.
"I had to," The Doctor replied. "She'd have died here with us. The Delta wave will be ready, but it won't be-"
"I knew we likely wouldn't live through this." Jack cut him off, reassuring him. "You sent her home, keep working. I don't doubt you. Never have, never will."
"Well, that makes one of us, then." The Doctor smirked. "But there's one thing I wish I could have figured out."
"What's that?" Jack asked.
"What was Bad Wolf?" He said, more to himself than to Jack, looking at the words over the lift doors. He shook his head, because it didn't matter. The Delta wave did, and getting Jack his defense codes. "Alright, Jack. The first number…."
~DW~
She didn't know how long she'd spent sobbing in her room before she'd fallen asleep. All Rose knew was that it was nearing tea time when she was finally up, her make-up cried off and eyes still a bit swollen. There was a gentle ringing in her ears, though at least her head didn't hurt despite how dehydrated she probably was. As much as she'd like to stay in bed forever, Rose knew she couldn't.
He wouldn't want that.
Sod what he wanted.
But then….
With a heavy sigh, Rose forced herself up and moved to the bathroom across the hall. She washed her face with cold water, reapplied a bit of mascara so Jackie wouldn't comment on her appearance over much, and then ventured out into the living room.
The TV was on, her mum and Mickey watching it until the shuffle of her feet caught their attention.
Jackie gave a weak smile. "Hello, Sweetheart," She said, and Rose moved to sit next to her on the sofa. She could feel them watching her, taking in the way she bent a knee, resting her foot on the cushion, the way she inspected her nails in an unseeing way.
"Are you hungry?" Jackie asked. "We could pop down to the chippy? Get something to eat?"
"Could use something," Mickey added in.
Rose just shrugged, but that seemed to be all the response they needed to get her to follow them out the door and around the corner to the local chippy.
Rose say down at an empty table next to the window and leaned her head against the sill, peering out. She'd walked across this lot with the Doctor, multiple times now. First as nothing more than strangers, then progressively as more. She started off chasing him, and then suddenly was holding his hand, laughing with him.
A box of chips was placed in front of her, the tang of vinegar mixed with the warm smell of grease teased her senses but didn't stir up a hunger. All it did was remind her off far off places, and a younger Doctor with longer curls and a more care-free flirtation.
She swallowed, her eyes stinging and the ringing in her eyes growing.
Her mum and Mickey carried on a conversation, simple and mundane and nothing that would have held her attention even if she'd tried. This was their normal. Chips at the local, and talk of the neighborhood. The gossip, the ins and outs, the same old-same old. But it had been months, probably more like a year for her on the TARDIS. A year of the everyday being a new planet or asteroid, somewhere in the past, or the future, or just hundreds of lightyears away from Earth where her mum was doing the laundry. Her every day was lounging in the console room, or the library while the Doctor worked or read. Talking for hours about nothing and everything. Of Jack joking and flirting, and the TARDIS being mischievous and teasing.
But there's one thing I ask of you, Rose. Just one thing: have a good life. Move on, be happy…
"I can't," She said aloud, stopping both Mickey and Jackie in their conversation, eyes drawn immediately to Rose. She blinked rapidly, a fresh wave of tears prickling her eyes. "I can't move on, can't…," She trailed off as a lump formed in her throat. "He's somewhere in the future, dying, and there's nothing I can do."
Jackie and Mickey exchanged an uneasy glance. "Well, like you said, it's the future, yeah? Probably way off." Jackie replied, trying to sound light.
"But it's not! It's now, the fight is happening right now, and he's fighting for us." Her voice broke. "He's fighting for us, for the whole planet, and I'm just sittin' here."
"Listen to me," Jackie said firmly, and Rose met her eye. "I made that man promise me to send you back to me if things went pear shaped, and he did just that. He sent you home, he did the right thing. God knows I didn't always get that man, or thought much of him from time to time, but right now, I love him."
"But what am I supposed to do?" Rose asked. "I can't… I can't just go back to how it was before him. I'm not the same, he changed me."
Her mum looked at her for a long while before she sighed, shaking her head. "I know it feels like the end, Rose, but you're young, and there are other blokes-"
"It's not what I meant!" Rose snapped. "I love him, yeah, course I do. But it's more than that. He showed me a better way of living. And I don't mean all the traveling, I mean taking a stand. Saying no, having the guts to do what's right when everyone else just runs away!"
"So, get a job with those people who came before." Jackie replied with exasperation. "Lord knows I'd much rather you do something like the butcher, or here, but still."
"I don't wanna work for UNIT, I don't wanna…. I wanna be with him. I wanna stand with him, and he just, and I…."
Rose kicked the table, and then got up, storming out of the chippy before the anger that fueled her turned into grief and she reverted back to a sobbing mess. The ringing in her ears didn't let up or grow as she marched across the lot toward the old playground where she and Mickey used to play.
It was mostly vacant now. The estates had grown harder of the years, and most children of playground going age were prone to stay inside and play a video game instead of coming out. Rose plopped down on a bench, far from the few that were out and about, laughing and running. She buried her face in her hands and bowed her head, resting elbows on her knees and tried to breath.
Her mum was right, of course. She could probably go work for UNIT. At least she wouldn't be a shop girl. She already knew Nell, liked her. Maybe her year or so with the Doctor would give her a decent position. She'd been running a lot, she was pretty fit, maybe she could-
What was she thinking? How could she even consider settling down for one moment? But how could she do anything else? It wasn't like she knew how to fly the TARDIS. It's not as though she even knew when he was, she only knew he was in the future. It was probably logged somewhere, but it wasn't like she could read Gallifreyan.
Rose heard Mickey approaching, his step distinct to her, but she didn't look up. She didn't remove her face from her hands or even give a sign she knew he was now sitting on the bench beside her. They sat in silence for a long time neither saying anything, and it was almost pleasant.
"You can't spend the rest of your life thinking about the Doctor." He said as gently as possible.
"I can't forget him." She said, then gave her eyes a rub before lifting her head and looking at Mickey. "I love him, Mick's. I love him more than anything. More than my own life. I know it sounds daft, but I would die for 'im."
"He wouldn't for you." He tried to counter, but Rose shook her head.
"You don't know 'im, not like I do. You don't see what he's willin' to do, and not just for me, but for everyone. Dying for him? Lettin' him live to keep the rest of the universe safe? Yeah, I'd do it."
"He can't give you a proper life."
"What's proper?" Rose asked, the ringing in her ears getting worse. She rubbed at it, wincing a little.
"A job, a home, a family. Settle down, get married, have kids."
"An' that's proper?" She asked.
"Yeah,"
"Right." She replied bitterly. "Only 's not how everyone does it, yeah? Not everyone sees life as this, this cycle of grow up, marry, have kids." She glanced away, wanting to keep from shouting while Mickey's face turned into something cold and bitter. "Not everyone wants that, some want…." She trailed off as her eyes skimmed the playground. "Some… want…." She tried again but slowly rose to her feet, getting a better view of the words she could make out on the far walls. The near walls. The concrete court sprawling before her. "Bad Wolf." She said in disbelief.
"They want Bad Wolf? What does that even mean?"
"No," Rose said, "No, it's… it's the words. They're here, they're everywhere look!" She said, getting up, darting closer and stopping somewhere in the middle of the large painted D on the concrete.
"That's been there for years, it's just a phrase." Mickey said behind her. "Just words."
"No, it's not! It's not just words, it means something! I thought it was a warning, but maybe it was a message? The same words written down now, and in the future with the Doctor. It's a link between us, Bad Wolf here…. Bad Wolf there!" Rose explained, gesturing wildly as she went.
"But if it's a message, what's it saying?" Mickey asked.
It was then that it clicked, and Rose understood. The ringing she was hearing wasn't her ears at all, it was her mind. It was in her mind, and there was only one being in the whole of time and space that had that connection with her mind without physical contact.
Without another word, Rose turned around and ran for the TARDIS.
~DW~
"Lynda, what's happening on Earth?" The Doctor asked her over the intercom, knowing she was monitoring the activity as Jack had asked her to.
There was a long pause before she replied. "The Fleet's descending… they're bombing whole continents." She swallowed, her voice shaking as she continued. "Europa… Pacifica… The New American Alliance… Australasia's just gone."
He bowed his head, closing his eyes for a moment. "I'm sorry. I had hoped that maybe sending everyone we could back to Earth would somehow save more lives. I was wrong."
"It's okay," Lynda lied, though she was trying her best to sound like she wasn't. "It's… not like you could have done anything."
"Maybe I could have." The Doctor said to himself, but he had a feeling those on the intercom could hear him.
A beat later, Jack said, "There is nothing you could have done different."
"There might have been." The Doctor countered, continuing his work on the Delta wave. "Right after I thought the war was over, I had begun a search for Gallifrey, to see if I could find a way to bring it back from where ever myself and a few other Time Lords had sent it. But without those other Time Lords, it was proving impossible."
"Do you think they'd help us? If you'd found them?" Lynda asked innocently, and the Doctor gave a quick, mirthless laugh.
"No," He replied. "No, they would have said that this wasn't for them to interfere in. If it wasn't affecting them, or time, then they wouldn't have intervened. No, I was looking for them because I thought I was lonely. I thought the silence in my head was too much, what with only the TARDIS to provide that mental link." He paused, just for a moment, allowing a little of the grief he was trying to stuff down surface for a second. "I didn't know real silence until now."
"Stop being maudlin, and get back to it." Jack teased, and the Doctor cracked a smirk. "We're running out of time, and if we're going to go down, we best take the Daleks with us."
"When at first you don't succeed," The Doctor quipped, and refocused his attention fully on the Delta Wave machine.
~DW~
As Rose unlocked the doors to the TARDIS, the ringing in her mind switched to relief before it changed to an all-consuming rage that wasn't her own." She stumbled through the door, falling hard on the metal floor before managing to half crawl to the center console. She put a hand on the panel, giving it a slight caress. The rage dimmed a bit, a bit of affection came through, but then the anger came back with a heavy side of frustration.
"Sorry," She whispered. "Upset as I was, forgot you lost him, too. Can't fly yourself, can you?"
Rose was then giving the odd mental image of a mouse in a box, trying to get it to move, and being unable to do so.
"Got all that power in you, and you can't really control it. And he never told me what to do, so I can't." She rested her forehead on the console, sighing, trying to send the Old Girl a mental hug.
Warmth washed over her, and she got the sense that the gesture was received and returned.
"Rose?" Mickey's voice came behind her, and only then did she realize she hadn't closed the door when she stumbled in. She looked over her shoulder, seeing Mickey do what she hadn't as he looked around the console room as if seeing it for the first time. He then looked to where she was and frowned. "You alright?"
"Yeah," She smiled. "Just sorta been a bad friend." She replied, and felt the TARDIS chide her. She looked up at the rotor. "Wha? Have been, yeah? Left you here all alone and felt sorry for myself." She could almost imagine a glare. "Did, don't argue."
"Rose. You… you sure you're okay?" Mickey asked again, and Rose had to laugh in spite of herself as Mickey seemed two seconds away from calling a hospital to have her admitted. Or, maybe more accurately, committed.
"Left the TARDIS." She replied. "She's a bit angry herself right now, left her be. Should've been in this together, she and I, and there I was swanning off to have a cry alone."
Mickey inched closer, looking up at the rotor with a frown. "So… so you're saying you're talking to a machine?"
"She's telepathic, Micks. She's alive."
"Right." Mickey said. "So, we're standing inside a living thing. You live inside a living thing. Alright then." He nodded, putting his hands in his pockets. "So, what, you two bad mouthing the Doctor like a pair of exes or something?"
"Venting together, I think's more like it." Rose replied, pulling herself up. Once on her feet, she kept her hands on the console, stroking it lightly. "She'd been trying to share her anger with me since we landed, but didn't know what it was. Thought it was my ears ringing." She explained with a self-deprecating smile.
Mickey eyed the rotor again, more wary than before. "So… you could talk to it? Like, away from it? You didn't need to be in here to… chat?"
"Sorta."
""Kay. So, why'd you come running here, then? When you thought there was a message? That Bad Wolf, thing?" He asked.
"Yeah. Thought maybe she was trying to get me back here so we could go back. Can't fly her, though. She can't fly herself."
"Rose, Micks, you in there?" Jackie's voice cut the conversation off, and Rose could almost hear a huff from the Time Machine in her head, and could picture a woman stomping her foot in utter frustration. Jackie opened the door, inching her way inside and shut it behind her. "What you hanging about in here for, then?" She asked.
"Rose was talking to it?" Mickey replied with a smirk.
"Her." Rose corrected, though she might not have spoken.
"What, like you'd talk to a car not working?"
"No, having a conversation, apparently. Ranting on about the Doctor."
"Oh, come off it." Jackie gave a swatting motion in Mickey's direction.
"Rose says it's telepathic."
"She is." Rose countered, and was soothed by the TARDIS. She turned, toward the rotor again, leaning as far over as she could to press her forehead to the center column.
Something sparked, like an electric shock in her head, causing her to gasp but not pull away.
For the first time in all her communicating with the TARDIS, it wasn't feelings or flashes of images she was getting, but something like words, something more solid than a vague idea of a question. It was like a whisper in her head in a language she didn't think she spoke but could understand if she listened carefully.
Had the TARDIS not already been a part of her, didn't already know her mind and heart as intimately as Rose knew herself, she may have asked, "How much do you love him?" But then, the Old Girl knew. Rose loved the Doctor as much as the TARDIS did, just in a different way. It could have been, "Are you willing to do anything for him?" But again, the TARDIS knew that Rose was more than willing to die for him, just as she had said to Mickey before. She wasn't afraid, not truly, not like she might have been in the beginning. She'd faced her death enough already, had looked at the Dalek, the Teller, the Gas Mask Zombies and Gelth to have come to terms with her mortal life and how life with the Doctor was as safe as it was boring. All that to know that if it came down to her or him, she would choose him.
But knowing Rose as she did, the words that came to Rose's mind when she touched her forehead to the rotor was simply: are you ready?
"Mum, Micks," She turned, looking at them over her shoulder. "Can you, umm… can you step out? Please?" She asked.
Jackie frowned. "What's going on, Rose?"
She swallowed. "There's something I gotta do, is all. Just wanna be alone."
Jackie narrowed her eyes, opened her mouth, and then paused. Slowly, Jackie released a sigh, her shoulders sagging as she nodded. "You're gonna go back for him, aren't you?"
"Yeah." Rose confessed, ensuring her tone brokered no arguments.
"An how are you gonna get there? How are you gonna help?" Jackie asked, crossing her arms.
"I don't know." Rose admitted. "But I want him safe, and I know we're better together than apart. The TARDIS seems to think we can get back somehow, gonna trust her." She replied, reaching behind her and patting the console. There was a wave of love that came over her, of mutual trust, that told Rose that it was unlikely the Old Girl wouldn't have trust just anyone with this task.
Jackie held Rose's eye for a long while before she managed a broken, "You come back here, is that understood? You do what you gotta do, and you save that man's hide so I can give him a piece of my mind, and then you come back here. I need to know you're safe."
Rose just nodded, because saying something out loud might be a promise she couldn't keep. She didn't want to do that; didn't want to say she'd come home when she wasn't sure she would.
Jack came closer and wrapped her arms tightly around Rose, and Rose returned the hug just as fiercely.
"Too much of your father in you," Jackie teased wetly. "He was always full of mad ideas, and if you ain't just a bit more mad than he was."
Rose laughed, feeling fresh tears prickle at eyes that had already cried enough. She stepped back and gave Mickey a quick hug to.
"Look after her for me?" She whispered, feeling him nod against her shoulder.
They parted, and Rose bounced on her heels a moment before shooing them toward the door. "Better not be in here for what's next," She said like she had some idea of what that was going to be.
Jackie and Mickey turned, both glancing over their shoulders at different times as if they somehow were teaming up to ensure Rose didn't disappear before the TARDIS let them out. They lingered by the entry as they stepped out, looking at her one last time before slowly closing door. Once it was shut, the lock sounded with an audible click.
"Right," Rose said, taking a steadying breath. "Right, so, what's going to happen now?"
There was another click behind her, and she noted a part of the panel had lifted up behind her, a bright, warm glow coming from within.
"What's in there? Instruction manual?" She asked, shifting down to it.
She faltered when danger warnings flashed in her mind.
At own risk! Danger!
"That's the only way, though, isn't it?" She asked. "'S the only way to get back to him."
The lights in the console dimmed, throwing the glow in greater contrast. Rose took a deep breath, stood in front of the open console, and put her hands on the edge. As the light liked her skin, she could hear something more distinct.
All that is, all that was, all that ever will be.
It whispered in her mind, along with echoes of the past, and maybe the future. Voices that were strange and yet familiar saying a multitude of different things, but at least six of those voices said her name. She could feel a light headache caress her temples, a pressure building in point in her head that she suddenly felt was linked to how she spoke to the TARDIS and the Doctor.
We want you safe.
Her own voice came through, though it was blended with something else. Someone else.
It was the TARDIS, she was certain.
And somehow that's what Rose needed to lift the console and looked into the light.
~DW~
The Doctor stood before the finished device, shoulders squared, facing the lift as he knew the Daleks would arrive any moment. Behind him, the Dalek Emperor was projected above the controls, having hacked in and allowed himself to watch these last moments just after Jack declared himself the last man standing. This was it, the end, and the Doctor was going to face it with as much bravery as he could muster.
The lift doors opened, and the Daleks poured out, circling him and the device.
"So here we are, once again." He said as he rested his hand on the switch. "My old enemies and I, facing each other one last time."
"You will not activate the Delta Wave." The Emperor said behind him.
"Oh I most certainly will." He replied without looking away from the Daleks before him. "I am the worst version of myself you could ever have dared to face. I have no home, my TARDIS is gone, every human in the area has been eradicated, there are no other Time Lords left to stop you, and I have nothing left to lose." He glanced briefly over his shoulder, but returned his focus on the Daleks.
"You will kill all life." The Emperor reminded him. "You will be a killer."
"So be it." The Doctor replied, grip shifting on the switch. "Better to die a human than to live as a Dalek. Better the lives of few over the lives of many. I have faced this choice time, and time again. In every other case I have found another option, but I think my luck's run out." He huffed. "I guess I've just lived too long."
"Then activate the Delta Wave, Doctor, and prove yourself: killer, or coward."
He tightened his grip, muscles in his arm flexing to push. But he had made a promise, and he was damned well going to keep it. So, he closed his eyes, cleared his mind, and brought up a perfect image of Rose. A Rose barely awake in the morning but with an amused grin as he said or did something, she found amusing but refused laugh at. Rose with light playing on her golden locks, and love in her eyes.
Rose and the TARDIS.
Except, he didn't mean to think about the Old Girl. He loved her, of course, and he was glad she would be among his last thoughts, but he hadn't intended it. She just sort of crept in there, lingering in his mind and weakly calling him a complete and total idiot, be he was their idiot, and they would be damned if he killed himself.
His eyes sprang open, the Doctor catching on just a bit too late that it wasn't some sort of memory or a product of a wandering mind, but his mental link with the TARDIS catching up to him at rapid speed before the sound of the engines filled the room and the brilliant blue box appeared.
"No," He said in wonder and confusion. "How…?"
The doors swung open outward, a bright, golden light blinding him and throwing the room in shadow. And there in the middle of it was Rose.
She stood tall, back straight, chin up. She radiated power and control, of something darker and more dangerous than any, every Dalek in the room. Her eyes glowed golden, and wisps of vortex energy danced around her.
"What did you do?" He asked in an awed, terrified whisper.
"I looked into the TARDIS, and the TARDIS looked into me." She explained, her voice different, ethereal.
"You… you what?" His hearts began to beat faster, fear gripping them.
"This is an abomination!" The Emperor decreed, and Rose's attention snapped quickly to the screen.
"EXTERMINATE!" The nearest Dalek declared, not sparing a single second more before firing a bolt of deadly energy right at Rose.
She didn't even flinch. With fast reflexes, she raised her hand and the beam reversed course, returning to the Dalek and returning to the gun.
The Doctor's stomach gave a lurch as he looked from the Dalek to Rose.
"I am the Bad Wolf," she explained. "I create myself. I take the words; I scatter them in time and space. A message to lead myself here." She said as she looked to the name, Bad Wolf Corporation, just behind the projection of the Emperor, and raised her hand. As she did, the letters appeared to float and waver before disappearing.
"I never showed you where the heart of the TARDIS was, I never told you what could happen if you looked into it. You've got the whole time vortex in you Rose, how did you even manage that?"
She looked at him once more. "I looked into the TARDIS, and the TARDIS looked into me. We are one."
He got the image then, a quick flash that a human brain would have thought as nothing more than a fleeting thought. But he could see it, from both perspectives. He could see Rose's anguish and desperation. He could see the TARDIS frustrated and angry. He could see how the TARDIS made the decision as soon as she landed that she would do what it took to get back to him. How with every statement, every confession Rose made to her mum and Mickey that she needed to be, wanted to be, and belonged at the Doctor's side, to stand with him and help where she could, just made the Old Girl more sure that she should allow this human vessel she cared for so much risk her life to return them both to him.
"We want you safe," Rose said, snapping him back to it. "I want you safe, my Doctor," she said, a little more of her true voice coming through before her eyes glowed, and that ethereal tone took over once more. Her eyes snapped back to the projection. "Protected from the false God."
"You cannot hurt me." The Emperor boasted. "I am immortal."
"You are tiny," Rose replied, a bit of something else coming through, something higher pitched and achingly familiar. "I can see all of time and space, every single atom of your existence, and I divide them." Rose raised her hand, and as she did, the Dalek that shot at her began to turn to dust. "Everything must come to dust, all things. Everything does." The voice evened out again, and she moved her hand in an arch, all the Daleks in the room going the way of their friend, their atoms disintegrating. "The Time War ends."
"I will not die!" The Emperor cried out, terrified. "I cannot die!" But even as he said it, the Doctor could see the Emperor's body turning to dust just like all the other Daleks.
When the cries faded, and Rose lowered her hand, the Doctor slowly moved to stand in front of her.
"Alright, Rose. You've done it, darling, you've stopped them all. Now, let it go. Let it go before you burn."
"How can I let go of this?" She asked in a wonderous tone. "I bring life."
In an instant, the Doctor's stomach lurched. Something was wrong, something that wasn't meant to happen came into fruition. A fixed point in a living being. Even the TARDIS, the part of Bad Wolf that was made up of her, recoiled at the sudden wrongness of the beloved Jack Harkness.
"Rose, you have to stop, you're not in control anymore." He pleaded.
"But I can see everything. All that is, all that was, all that ever could be." She said, tears rolling down her cheeks. "I could lose you."
"And I could lose you." He said as he clutched her hands, trying to meet her eye. "Rose, we could lose you, please, let it go before that happens, please."
"My head," Rose said, shutting her eyes. "It hurts."
"Then let go," he pleaded.
His respiratory bypass kicked in as he waited for the next word, the next move. All the air left his lungs as Rose tipped her head back, opened her mouth, and the essence of the vortex escaped and headed back inside the TARDIS. He heard the console latch close, and the bright light faded away as Rose collapsed against him.
His hearts still pounded, the rushing of blood past his ears drowning out how deafening the silence was as he struggled to regain control of his mind and hearts while clutching Rose to his chest.
She was barely breathing. He had to concentrate to feel the her take shallow breaths. He put a shaky hand to her temple and barely felt a thrum.
"Hold on, love." He said as he moved her about, shifting her so he could lift and carry her bridal style back into the TARDIS, away from the empty room and the grating feeling of Jack's wrongness as inched ever closer.
He was thankful the TARDIS didn't shut the doors once the Vortex was back inside her, because the Doctor didn't think he had the strength at the moment to open them himself.
Once past the threshold, he set her down on the nearest jumpseat, and sent the TARDIS into the vortex. The relief of being away from a mutated fixed point eased his gut-wrenching nausea only slightly, because now he could really look at Rose. Now, without something making his skin crawl, he could see she was deathly pale. That a human would never have seen that she still drew breath, would assume her dead.
In a blink, he was running, moving as quickly as he could to a relocated med bay, brought forth with the last of the strength the TARDIS had before she went into hibernation, floating in the vortex. Part of him wanted to rage at his time ship, curse her for being so selfish, so arrogant, so assured that she would use Rose to get back to him. Allow, no, encourage Rose to do something so dangerous it may kill her all in the name of saving his sorry….
But the TARDIS loved Rose as much as he did. She wouldn't have put her in danger if she didn't foresee something.
The doors to the Medbay opened at his approach, and his boot slid against the smooth tile and cause him to momentarily lose control, crashing into the shelf he had been heading for and jostling the bottles given to him by Ohila on Karn. The moved about, all too similar in appearance and color for his frantic mind to decipher. He needed the one that would heal, the one that would surely bring Rose back from the brink.
And then he spotted it, on the cork, in Gallifreyan. The two words that were a warning as much as a sign of hope: Bad Wolf.
Plucking it off the shelf, he dashed back to the console room.
He fell to his knees beside her, lifting her head and tilting it back slightly with one hand. He brought the bottle to his mouth and pulled the cork free with his teeth, spitting it out off to the side. He then brought the bottle to Rose's parted mouth, pouring a little in. He shifted his grip, wrapping his arm around her in a way that he could message her throat and encourage her to swallow. He did this, bit by bit, until the bottle was empty.
Gently, he laid her back down, then turned so he was resting back against the jumpseat. He reached over his right shoulder and took her hand, feeling her warm, human heat had diminished but didn't vanish.
The Doctor closed his eyes, resting his head against her side, and waited.
~DW~
Jack watched the TARDIS dematerialize in shock.
How was it that it returned, and why did the Doctor leave without him? Why was he alive again when no one else seemed to be? Where were the Daleks?
He looked over his shoulder, the projector displaying empty space.
He checked his Vortex manipulator, doing a scan for life signs and finding nothing.
He was alone. The Daleks were gone, but so was the Doctor.
"Well," he said to himself. "At least I know roughly when he's going."
Jack programmed his manipulator to sometime in 2005, London, Earth, and activated it.
—
Jack would wait one hundred and forty years to actually find them. And in that time, he would figure out that there was a reason he was the only man left alive at the Games Station.
~DW~
He awoke four hours, thirty-seven minutes, and twenty-one seconds after he'd accidentally dozed off. The hand beneath his had not warmed in the slightest. In fact, if memory served him correctly, Rose's skin was at least three degrees cooler, give or take being off a little.
The Doctor got on his knees and moved around, looking down at his beloved and shifting his grip to check her pulse. It was weak, barely hanging in there, and her breathing was slower, though it didn't appear more labored.
He'd gotten a sinking feeling that he may have made a grave mistake.
Getting on his feet, he turned around and stumbled around the console, inputting coordinates for a location he hadn't particularly wanted to revisit ever again.
The TARDIS activated, and it took him a moment to realize she still wasn't wholly restored herself. Her mental link with him was present and stable, strong at a stretch, but she was still weak overall. She could move about the vortex and take him where and when he wanted to go, but she couldn't talk to him at the same time, not yet.
He didn't move when they landed, but instead pushed a button to open the door just a crack to allow the person he knew would come to enter.
He waited, glancing at Rose, before hearing the creek of the door opening further.
"I hadn't expected you back this soon," Ohila said as she closed the door behind her.
"Ohila, meet Rose," He said, gesturing to his love before turning to face the leader of the sisterhood.
"I would, but she appears to be unconscious." Ohila retorted, sparing the blonde a glance.
"She is." He replied. "She took the vortex into her body and temporarily became a goddess."
"We felt the effects," Ohila nodded.
He stared at her for a long moment, trying to get a read on her, and unable to do so. "I gave her one of your potions." He said softly. "She was alive, but weak, dangerously weak."
Ohila narrowed her eyes, her head tilting slightly before she moved to Rose's side. She looked her over, kneeling down slowly. Then Ohila picked up her hand, holding it in both of hers.
"She should be awake by now, should she not?" He asked her softly.
Ohila didn't reply right away.
"I gave you three bottles." She eventually said, her voice barely above a whisper, though it rang clear in the quiet, empty room. "One for healing, one for aid in regeneration, and one for a future you had yet to find." She turned and looked at him gravely over her shoulder. "You gave your companion the one to aid in regeneration."
His blood ran cold.
"What will happen to her?" He asked.
"I don't know." Ohila replied, looking down at the prone form before her. "If she had the vortex in her body, she would be steeped in huon particles. It is possible that the potion will think her a time lord, feed off those particles and heal her as if she simply had a faulty regeneration. Or-"
"Or it could kill her." The Doctor ran a hand down his face. "Why couldn't you have labeled them more clearly?"
"Why didn't you keep them sorted in a such a way that you would know which was which?" She countered.
"It was an accident, I …knocked them about. But there were words on the cork, in Gallifreyan. Words that Rose… Rose had put out in the universe to guide us, to bring us to this moment. She wouldn't… she couldn't have…."
He stopped when he felt Ohila's hand on his arm, smiling sadly at him before she went past him, deeper into the TARDIS, and the Doctor didn't have the strength or will to stop her. He sighed instead, and returned to Rose's side where he knelt down and took her hand in his. He kissed her knuckles, before pressing her palm against his cheek.
"Why must you be so stubborn my brave, beautiful girl?" He asked her in a whisper. "I could lose you now, all because you had to come back and save me. Save me from myself." He didn't get an answer, he didn't expect one. Instead, he closed his eyes again and attempted to reach out to her mentally.
He was met by silence, but he couldn't say he expected much more than that, given her state.
He heard Ohila approach by the brush of her skirts on the floor, and looked up as she knelt beside him at Rose's side. She handed him a bottle.
"Your friend, he's already a fixed point, is he not?"
"You knew?" He asked her.
"It was foreseen. All of this was foreseen. But like most things involving time, it had been rewritten. It was meant that your friend would be a fixed point. This potion," she said, handing it to the Doctor. "Was made to aid you time sense, to allow you to adapt to having him near. You were meant to take the vortex out of your lover, but die in the process. The potion you mistakenly gave her was meant to aid you. And then, had you and she survived another test to come, you would have used the chameleon arch to change her into a Gallifreyan, to allow her to live out a natural life with you. The potion for healing, that was meant to aid her in that future outcome."
"So, much like you foresaw the crash with Cass."
"Yes," Ohila nodded. "Time was altered. Perhaps it was your lover who had done it."
"Perhaps," He acknowledged, remembering what she'd said. All that was, is, and will be.
"Bring her home." Ohila said after a beat. "If this does not go in her favor, allow her family and loved ones a chance to say goodbye."
"And if it does?" He asked.
"You believe there will be a good outcome?"
"I'm ever the optimist." He replied.
Ohila nodded, a small, sad smile on her lips. "I wish you luck, Doctor."
"Thank you for coming to me." He returned, and Ohila was on her feet, heading for the door.
When it was closed, he let out a long, held-in breath.
"Oh, Rose." He said. "I'm so sorry, darling." He managed to get to his feet, set the coordinates for Jackie's home not long after Rose would have left to return to him, and braced himself for what was to come.