LA – Present time

I sat in silence for a long while after Regina finished telling me her story, I had dried tears down my checks and my heart was breaking. I couldn't even look at Regina in her eyes. I don't know how she managed to get through that whole story. The memories were slowly coming back to me. Although they weren't clear, there was a familiarity about some parts that were too real to be made up. I knew that everything she spoke of was true, I knew the love that she described was true. It felt like I was listening to a story I hadn't heard for years and small pieces were coming back to me slowly.

I finally got the courage to look at her face, she had her head down on her knees crying silently. I brought my hand up and touched her leg. She slowly lifted her head and my heart shattered into a million pieces. "my queen" I whispered

She gasped and broke down in tears again, "do you remember?" she said through her sobbing

"I do, not all, but I do" I moved closer to her and wrapped my arms around her small body "although what I remember feels like a dream it feels too real to be made up"

"what happened to you, where did you go, why did you leave, why didn't you come back" she was clinging onto me, she was truly broken. I pulled back so I was looking in her eyes.

"I don't know Regina, but I do know that I wouldn't have just left you, there has to be a reas..." I suddenly stopped, it was as if the air was sucked out of my body suddenly "...oh my god"

"what, what is it? She sounded worried but I didn't know what to tell her, I had an idea, but I couldn't be sure

"what happened after that night?"

"well as you know, our relationship was new so not many people knew about it, it was mainly my friends, so I didn't have a lot to go on. That night when you didn't come back, I had a sickening feeling in my heart. For the next few days I searched, I even went to where Bella died trying to find clues. Then I finally managed to get hold of Killian..."

"what did he tell you" I cut her off, she looked like she was going to explode.

"well, when I finally reached him, he, he told me that you didn't want to be with me anymore and that America was a mistake. He told me that you went to see him the next morning after walking around all night clearing your head and that if I were to contact him to tell you to move on with your life and that it would have been too hard for you to tell me. He made it sound so believable Emma, he told me you weren't ready, it was too soon after Bella"

I do not think I have ever felt so much hatred towards someone in all my life.

I completely lost it

"HOW FUCKING DARE, HE" I must of scared her as she jumped back into the seat but I didn't care I was raging "I COULD FUCKING KILL HIM, I WAS IN A DAM ACCIDENT REGINA, I NEARLY DIED" I took a deep breath trying to calm my heart rate, looking into Regina's eyes, I could see the fear behind them, I didn't want to scare her "I was in a coma for a two weeks, I apparently fell from a bridge and impaled myself on a metal railing" I lifted my top up to show her the scar on my chest, she stood up with tears in her eyes and held my chest

She wrapped her arms around me crying "he told me you left me" we were both shaking with a mixture of hurt and anger.

"AND YOU BELIEVED HIM, after what you just told me, you should have known I wouldn't have left you" I was beyond mad

"Emma please, I was broken, I didn't know what to do. At first, I found it hard to believe but the more time that went by and you didn't contact me or find me I began to believe him, I'm sorry I'm so, so, sorry please forgive me?" she was holding on tightly to me. I pried her off my body and pushed her away

"NO, I lost myself again, I forgot everything, I didn't know that I had already overcome my demons, I went back down to the bottom, I went to rehab. It took me years to pull myself through it. I can't believe you gave up on me. I can't believe Killian did this, he lured me into thinking I cared for him, that he was there for me and helped me mend" I whispered the last part

"wh-what do you mean you cared for him? Please, please tell me...please tell me what I'm thinking is wrong"

I hung my head down, I had tears in my eyes I was so mad, but I felt so stupid "you don't understand Regina, he was the only one that was there for me. I was lost. But now I feel so fucking stupid, an idiot, I feel used" I went to turn around "I need to be by myself"

She quickly grabbed my hand "Emma no, I am not letting you go again, I don't care about Killian, I could murder him also, but I got you back and I need you to stay with me"

She was right, I couldn't leave her again "OK I won't leave. But I do need to think this through. I need to speak to Ruby" I looked into her eyes and reluctantly pulled away from her. My heart was breaking and judging by the look in her eyes, I know hers was too, but I needed a moment. I needed a third person to lay this all out too. I was so confused.

I walked to the bedroom and dialled Ruby's number. It rang a few times until she answered

"Bitch this better be good, it's like 3am"

I didn't say anything but cried down the phone

"babe, what happened"

"I don't... I don't know where to start"

I sat on the phone with Ruby and explained what I had found out, there were plently of gasps, ooohs, and a lot of swearing coming from her end.

"what a fucking bloody arsehole" I could tell she was angry just as much as me. "Emma, you realise he is the reason you have been like this for nearly 10 years, he manipulated you, he used you, he made Regina think you left her. He made you think you liked cock, I mean eeewww what a bell-fucking-end"

"always one with words Ruby, but yes you are right. I cannot blame Regina, it wasn't her fault, but I need to confront Killian. I need to find out what really happened that night"

After I got off the phone with her, I walked back to where Regina was. She was curled up on the sofa with her head on her hands, she was fast asleep, by the look on her face she cried herself to sleep. I got a blanket and pulled it over her, I kissed her head "I love you" I said, I went to walk away, and she grabbed my wrist

"I love you too, I'm so sorry. Please stay"

"I am not going anywhere, I am with you always. But, will you take a trip me my queen"

She smiled when I called my queen "where do you want to go"

I took a deep breath "Home, I am going to find out what that bastard did"