Adventures In Solitude

by Jdphobe

Fifteen years after Assclass, Nagisa, now 30, has done a pretty bang-up-job of becoming a teacher. Happily married, he's ready to move onto his eighth year of teaching, now at the renovated E-Class building. Life is good. But will everything he believes be tossed upon its head when he meets a strange student he quickly becomes convinced is the reincarnation of Korosensei?

30. Inheritance Time

"...I wish I could understand you."

"Are we really on about this again?"

"We're going to spend our lives together! It's important!"

---

...Fumiko gets the idea when Nagisa doesn't mention it.

She doesn't know if he just forgot, or if it was intentional. But when he goes all of the first day of third trimester without mentioning the new class representatives, she gets a crazy, wonderful idea.

"We should ask!"

"...Excuse me?"

She pitches it on the way home from school. And Makoto and Kiyoshi must not get what she's prattling on about, because they're staring at her like she's a crazy person.

"To be class representatives," she says. "Shiota-sensei didn't assign anyone as the new representatives for this trimester. We should talk to him and see if we can get the position."

She pauses and looks Kiyoshi's way.

"Er- Makoto and I, I mean. I mean, I'd love if there could be three. Maybe Shiota-sensei could make an exception for there to be three. I wouldn't want to-"

"No," Kiyoshi interjects, holding up a finger. "You don't need to sugarcoat that one. I don't wanna be a class representative. I am horrible with positions of power." He sweats. "I can hardly decide what to eat for breakfast in the morning. You think I could handle being in charge of people? No way."

"Okay," Fumiko says. "I just wanted to- like - make sure."

"And I appreciate it."

Fumiko smiles and turns to Makoto. "Think about it. Shiota-sensei would be so proud of us. And… and we could help everyone in the class! We… never got a chance to do that together back then. Wouldn't it be sweet to take our rightful place back now, even just for a little bit?"

"Well, it sounds insane when you put it like that," Makoto admits, eyes fixed on the ground. "Do you really think we could handle it?"

"Of course we could!" Fumiko replies, reaching for his hand. What is with him today? Usually he's the one encouraging her to try new, stupid shit. Has she seriously managed to pitch something beyond his consideration? "I mean, it's at least worth a shot. If he says no, he says no. But if he says yes, we've got this in the bag. It's not like it'll be actual work. We'll just be in charge in case anything happens and he needs to leave class."

"...Well, I suppose it could be sort of fun," Makoto says, cracking a smile. "And I would like Nagisa to see how far I've come."

"Then you'll consider it!?"

Fumiko's humiliated by just how quickly the excitement creeps into her voice, but manages to hide it well. With how damn cold it is outside, it's easy to disguise the pink creeping up her cheeks as nothing more than the chill. She will not be caught ashamed of being passionate. She's just managed to find passion, after all.

And besides… silly as it is, she thinks this will be a good taste of what being in charge of a classroom environment feels like. If she really wants to consider maybe following in her own footsteps later in life, she needs to see if she actually likes it.

Makoto's expression seems to lighten as she speaks. Laughing, he tilts his head and says, "Well I don't see why not. You're right. How hard can it be?"

Fumiko's shoulders relax. "I'm glad I managed to get you to relent," she says. "If you hadn't caved, I was gonna have to force Kiyoshi to run with me."

Kiyoshi's head whips around. "I never agreed to this!"

And Fumiko snickers. "Well thankfully, you won't have to."

She says it as a joke, but deep down she is relieved Makoto had agreed to back her up. Pathetic as it is, she doesn't know if she'd be willing to do this without him. She's honestly pretty bad with strangers still. So she'd much rather do this by the side of someone she knows well.

(And as Kiyoshi said, he never fucking agreed to this. They joke, but she'd never intentionally force him into a position he's not comfortable with.)

With a cheery attitude, they agree to pitch the concept to Nagisa tomorrow morning.

---

"No. It's not. The only reason it keeps coming up time and time again is because you're an ignorant and stubborn person. You're not capable of understanding me. When will you get that?"

"Well, then. Let me rephrase. I wish you'd let me understand you."

"There's a difference?"

---

"You… want to be class representatives?" Nagisa asks, staring at them from across his desk.

Fumiko gives a nervous nod, bouncing from foot to foot.

"Obviously… I would never make the claim that I am entitled to any right, but I believe I and Makoto have come rather far over the course of the year, and would only benefit further from such a position. If you do not believe it would be a good fit for us, you have every right to decline, but I figured it was worth asking. After all, it seems you have not decided on who is to be in charge for the next trimester."

Nagisa awkwardly scratches at his shoulder, glancing from his planner to his watch and back to the two of them. "...Yeah," he replies "It seems I have. I knew I was forgetting something." He admits with a nervous laugh. "But I'm not sure I can just hand that role out to the two of you-"

"And why not?" Fumiko replies. She's open to a dismissal! She swears! She'd just like to know why.

"Personally, I think the two of you would make wonderful class representatives. But I am a little afraid your classmates would feel the two of you had an unfair advantage. I spend a lot of time with you, after all. I wouldn't want anyone else to think they didn't get a chance because we're somehow not 'close enough.' This is very much an environment where I try to foster the atmosphere that everyone is on an equal playing ground."

Fumiko's gaze drifts towards the ground, but she nods. "...I understand. And so that's a 'no,' then?"

"Now I never said that," Nagisa replies.

And Fumiko's head shoots up. "You mean there's still a chance!?" she asks. "How!?"

"Well… there's this thing I've been mulling over," Nagisa says. "I'm not sure if you know, but we're coming up on a unit about different types of political systems in history class. Your democracies, your monarchies, your anarchies and so on. And I've been looking for a way to make it more interesting and hands-on for all of you. You know very well by now that I'm not too into the 'sit down and write notes' sort of learning."

"It turns out this just sort of conveniently ended up aligning with my other problem: that I just haven't been able to decide on a class representative for the upcoming trimester. I'm not sure if it's a silly idea, but I've been thinking about maybe letting you kids run a mock election to see who should become the next class reps. Anyone who wanted to could run, and it would give you all some experience in flexing your strategic muscles and getting to know a little bit more about your classmates."

"What do you think?" he asks. "Do you think it's a good idea, or sort of pointless?"

Fumiko opens her mouth to speak, but pauses when she sees Nagisa's eyes are firmly fixed on Makoto. Ah… and so it's not her opinion he's particularly looking for.

That's fine. It's whatever. It's not like he knows her secret, after all.

Makoto's quiet for a long moment, as if thinking it over in depth. His eyes drift towards Fumiko, then back towards Nagisa… and suddenly, he stands up straight. Like a lightbulb's gone off in his head, he nods, and with intensity at that.

"I think… that's a great idea!" he says, the excitement growing in his voice. "Because then everyone would be on equal playing ground. We'd all have a chance!"

"Exactly. If you two want this position, you're gonna have to earn it. And not from me," Nagisa says. "Which… is probably a good thing. I've been told I'm a little too easy to win over."

He laughs, clasping his fingers with a smile. "Instead, you'll have to win over your classmates. Which I'm sure will be no easy feat, at least in comparison. You're gonna need to give them all a reason to support you. What can you offer them that they can't offer themselves? And what qualities do you have that make you a good leader? I think it would be a good thing for everyone in the class to think these questions over. And I suppose this election will give you the chance. It's settled, then."

"We'll run a class election!"

...Strange as the whole ordeal is, Fumiko isn't too opposed. She knows all about political systems (which made Nagisa's reference of Anarchy earlier all the more concerning) and she believes in her own strengths. She's got this in the bag.

No. They've got this in the bag!

The rest of the class, however, is much less receptive.

As usual with Nagisa's ideas, everyone around him is downright baffled. An election!? For seventh-grade class representatives!? Seriously!? What is with this class!? But after a bit of honestly understandable confusion, they seem to come around. Because, hey, at least it's a break from the normal slog of class. And although while for the most part no-one else seems too interested in 'running,' two other pairs of classmates do step up to the plate.

Kazuki and Rin, one of whomst is clearly taking this much more seriously than the other, and Yoshito and Kanon, who shoot her the strangest look when she says she's going to run as well.

Nagisa says he's very proud of all six of them. And that he wishes them all the best in this upcoming (and very fake) election. He reminds everyone else to take this seriously, and not to just vote for their friends. Because the class representatives will be in charge if anything ever happens to him.

"Temporarily," he specifies. "If I. Fell over dead they would not become the new teachers. But mostly only because that's not legal."

He claps his hands. "Additionally, I'll be allowing them to make up one additional rule for the classroom. One that they believe would help the class, specifically. If the new class representatives decide on 'everyone should be allowed to bring their 4ds into class and play it unsupervised,' I'm afraid I am going to have to revoke their privileges. But… that won't happen, will it?"

Fumiko's not so sure, but that does make every head in the room perk up. There's nothing that motivates kids if not for the concept of unrestrained power. With something slightly more monumental than 'technically in charge maybe once a month' on the table, excitement around the election finally begins to buzz just a little more.

Although the rest of the classes continue as usual, (Nagisa says in between the sports festival and the moon unit he can't allot any more full days to single topics) History hones in on the election. As Nagisa explains different political systems, the students in running discuss their gameplans. And the students who are not participating circle their desks, stopping by with spiral notebooks and surprisingly intense looks. Here to ask questions about what sort of changes their classmates would enact on this classroom if given the chance.

"I… am not really sure quite yet," Fumiko admits. "We still need time to plan before making a definitive statement. But thank you for your interest."

"Oh my god," Riko comments through a snort-laugh. "You guys are taking this seriously, aren't you?"

"Only kinda," Makoto admits. "But thank you!"

That only makes Riko laugh harder. With a charmed smile, she sets her notebook aside. "Try not to stress about this too much, 'kay? Shiota-sensei's making this seem like such a big deal, but I'm voting for you guys anyways. You are my friends, after all."

Fumiko's not sure about friends, but Riko is a nice girl. She sits behind her, and when her closer friends either end up absent or playing hookie, she's nice to chat with. She's funny, sweet, and she, too, thinks monsters are hot shit.

However...

"Isn't that what Shiota-sensei told you not to do?" Fumiko asks. "While I appreciate the flattery, I'd like to win on my assets, as opposed to my popularity."

"Please don't call it your assets-" Kiyoshi whispers from his own desk, but is swiftly ignored.

"I 'spose," Riko replies. "But I do believe in your guys' 'assets!' That's why we're friends. I saw what you guys did during the sports festival. You pulled off some really cool stuff! I bet you'd make great leaders."

And clear as day, her sincerity shines through. Fumiko hides a dorky smile, instead whispering a quick "thank you," and a "we appreciate your prolonged support."

Riko laughs the loudest she has yet as she returns to her seat. And somehow the opposite of humiliated, Fumiko feels her heart glow with pride.

---

"Of course there's a difference!"

"Then please, enlighten me, the literal genius. Let me in on what I'm so incapable of understanding."

"I'm not accusing you of not understanding anything!"

"Really? Because I thought I heard-"

"Why do you always do this!? Why do you always put words in my mouth!?"

---

Kiyoshi voices the same opinion later in the day. Long after Riko's marched off to do whatever it is Riko does, he speaks up in a quiet voice.

"She's right, you know."

"Pardon?" Fumiko asks.

"That you'd make really good leaders. You're super inspiring people."

"You really think so?" Fumiko asks, craning her head back to meet his eyes. "I dunno. I mean, we are up against some pretty legitimate competition."

Kazuki's a big fat joke, but Rin's got her head screwed on straight. She's analytical, clever, and good with her words. Even if she's partnered up with probably the worst candidate on the planet, Fumiko has a feeling she'll still give them a run for their money. And that's not getting started on Kanon and Yoshito, who she thinks might just be taking this even more seriously than they are. With their folders propped up on their desks to hide whatever it is they're working on, they whisper under their breath.

They keep looking her way. And with such a nasty gaze. Seriously! What did she even do to them?

"I mean, yeah," Kiyoshi admits. "But you guys are the ones with experience. You know what you're doing... sorta." He pauses, his gaze drifting to Makoto, who appears to be having trouble getting glue unstuck from his hand. "Barely. Whatever."

"I'unno," Makoto admits, picking at it with the back of his nail. "I don't think experience really matters in this sorta situation. I mean, I had none back then. A lot of it is improvisation. Teaching, I mean - Which. This isn't even really. This is more like running for prime minister."

Kiyoshi blinks. "I wouldn't say it's-"

"It's running for prime minister."

"Okay," Kiyoshi relents.

"Yeah. At the most this will just be helping Shiota-sensei out a little," Fumiko agrees. "And… getting to make up a rule, whatever that means."

"You got any ideas for that yet?" Kiyoshi asks.

"No way," Fumiko replies. "I mean… I didn't do this because I wanted to make any change. I like Shiota-sensei's classroom. I guess I just wanted to relive it or whatever. There's nothing wrong with that, is there?"

"No," Kiyoshi says. "At least, I mean… I don't think so. It'd be different if you sucked at this, maybe - But you don't. I think you two would make perfectly good class figureheads."

"Aw," Fumiko says. "Thanks."

Kiyoshi nods, giving her a genuine smile. And as Makoto finally manages to pick the glue off of his hand, he stares intently at the table.

The clock ticks, and the second day is soon upon them.

---

"Because you're obsessed with disrespecting me!"

"No! I'm not-"

"Then tell me-"

"What I'm saying is that I wish you would tell me. If I'm so stupid… so incapable of understanding whatever it you're going through, then I wish at the very least you would open up to me."

"..."

---

Kanon, and Yoshito, especially, don't seem to carry the same sort of faith in regards to them.

They strut up to their desks Tuesday afternoon, right in the middle of history class. Yoshito leading the way, and with Kanon right behind him. She holds her notebook carefully to her chest, as if trying to hide it, but Fumiko can spot it's pastel pink cover.

She glances up from where she'd been working on a paper imploring them to consider what they'd like to accomplish in the next trimester. And hiding her answers with her hands, she asks "What do you want?"

"Nothing in particular," Yoshito answers. "I just figured it could be productive to interview the other candidates. Shiota-sensei gave me permission to. Can we talk?"

"Of… course," Fumiko answers, pulling up a chair beside her. Kanon and Yoshito quickly take a seat, their expressions strangely harsh. "What is it you'd like to know about?"

"Well, mostly we were wondering about your game plan… what you intend to do if you succeed in obtaining this position. Shiota-sensei said himself he intends to allow the victor to change a rule in class. What is it you're planning on changing? How do you intend to assist your classmates?"

"Er… well... " Fumiko shifts uncomfortably. "That's something we're still trying to get figured out." She hates being put on the defensive like this! "Honestly, when we signed up for this, we didn't realize we'd be given an opportunity to change the way the classroom functioned. We just thought-"

"You deserved it, then?"

"Excuse me?"

"You clearly had no intention of changing anything in particular. You just admitted that. Then why did you decide you two of all people were eligible for the position? Is it simply because you thought you were entitled to it?"

"Of- of course not!" Fumiko sputters. And she's getting angry, now. Who does this kid think he is that he can just strut up to her and accuse her of these things!? She just thought it would be…

...Fun? Nice? Nostalgic?

No. She - she won't consider it. There has to be a better reason than that. And… why does it matter, anyways!? This is just some silly student council position at best. It doesn't have a reason to be important to anyone else!

"Why, then?" Yoshito asks, his voice pure acid.

"I… I don't know-" Fumiko says. "Do you need a reason? It's - It's not that important, honestly. This classroom is… borderline perfect. What is it you think is so important that you need to change it now?"

"I dunno…" Yoshito muses, a nasty sneer on his face. "Perhaps - As a rule - I could ask Shiota-sensei to finally start paying equal attention to all of his students."

"I -" Fumiko stares. "What are you talking about!? That man works himself to the brink for us!"

"For you."

"Uh-! No!? He loves all of us equally!"

"Of course you'd think that. You practically live at his house." Yoshito muses. "But some of us aren't afforded that luxury."

"If you think he's not- If you- If you want something from him you can just ask him. Don't you- don't you dare go up there and demand that from him in front of the entire class! You're going to hurt his feelings!"

"Tch," Yoshito says. "Maybe then he'd just know how it feels." He crosses his arms and stands up. "Anyways... I suppose that's all I was trying to do. To figure out if I was right about you two. And it seems I am. That'll be useful in the upcoming days." He turns! And Kanon follows. "Watch your back, okay? Because if you thought this was going to be easy… that you could just get this position because you're Shiota-sensei's favorites, then think again. The class is going to decide this. And we know what we really want."

Fumiko stares as he goes, her jaw agape. What is he even on about!? She doesn't - WHAT!?

"What is his problem!?" she asks. "I…- Do you think he's actually gonna say that bullshit in front of Shiota-sensei?"

Makoto grimaces. He'd been weirdly quiet throughout that whole conversation, but that seems to earn his attention. "He better not!" he says. "I'd… I'd…-" His fist clenches as it shakes.

"He won't," Kiyoshi reassures. "It's… clear he's just bluffing. And doing some weird projecting or something. I don't know." He scratches his arm. "Usually when people say stuff like that they're just repeating things they think about themselves. There's no way he actually thinks that's true. Not about you, and not about Shiota-sensei. At least… I hope not."

But his words do little to reassure. Not only do the two of them now know they have a legitimate enemy in what initially seemed like a silly endeavor, but maybe also that he does have a point about them. Fumiko can't tell what Makoto's thinking, shifting uncomfortably in his seat, but even as she tries to get her own mind off of it, it gnaws at her… A sudden doubt she hadn't felt before.

Is that her motivation?

And if it is… just how wrong does that make her?

---

"The silent treatment won't make me any less right."

"You're never right, woman."

"..."

"Who's silent now?"

"You know, you're not very capable of understanding me, either."

---

"You… you don't think he's right, right?"

"'scuse me?"

She asks Makoto Wednesday afternoon. It's lunchtime, and it's been a little over 24 hours since Yoshito confronted the two of them. She hates the fact that she's letting it get to her so much, but if she doesn't say something she thinks she's going to explode. Makoto pauses, skidding to a stop from where he'd been pacing and turns his head her way.

"Yoshito, I mean," Fumiko says. "What he said about us the other day. You don't think I'm entitled, do you?"

"No," Makoto quickly responds. "I don't think you're entitled at all. You just wanna… do a thing because you think it'd be fun. It'd be different if you were doing this just because you wanted to make sure no-one else could get the position. But you're not."

"I know," Fumiko says. "I mean, I guess… I'm afraid my motive is just shallow?"

She keeps her voice low. It may be lunchtime, and everyone's busy with their own conversations, but all the same, they are in the same room. No-one's allowed to go outside for lunch during this time of the year. Understandable, considering Fumiko likes being able to feel her face, but inconvenient when she'd hate to be overheard.

"No," Makoto responds, returning to his pacing. He hasn't motioned to touch his lunch. "I think… you have a really good reason for this. No more shallow than doing it out of spite." He shrugs. "If anything, I don't think he was even really mad at you. He was probably talking to me."

Fumiko blinks. "What do you mean?"`

"I mean… all that stuff he said about not having a good reason to do this. Just… doing it because it's what I've always done… he was sorta right. I'm, uh… not really a great leader. Maybe I am being entitled in thinking I'd be okay at any of this. I keep wondering if maybe it'd be easier if I just dropped out."

Fumiko bolts to her feet, firmly shaking her head. "Don't say that," she says, reaching for his shoulder. "I need you. And... you're- you're a great leader! I mean… look at all the things you've done." She motions around the classroom. "Don't let that jerkass get in your head. We're gonna do this, and we're gonna be awesome at it."

Damn. She'd sure been doubting herself before, but it turns out nothing gets her raring quite like spite, either. She hates to hear Makoto talk about himself that way. He's plenty inspiring. He's the one who taught her how to step outside of the box!

"...Mmm," Makoto replies, his shoulders lowering. "I'm sorry. You're right. I dunno. I've just… felt weird lately?" he shakes his head firmly. "But… you're right. You're right. I want to do this with you. So we can't give up now!"

It takes him a second, but slowly that determined grin returns to his face. And it's like a switch has flipped. He's back to his usual self, cracking jokes and making dramatic gestures with his hands. Fumiko lets out an audible sigh of relief. She doesn't know what she'd do if he lost his spirit now.

"We'll… prove him wrong," she reassures. "Prove that he got the wrong impression of us. We'll come up with a great reason for our classmates to support us. And we'll come up with a rule that'll help everyone."

"One that won't hurt Nagisa's feelings," Makoto adds on.

"Of course not," Fumiko replies. "So let's brainstorm. We'll come up with something to knock their socks off."

And so they return to campaigning. But with only two days left until their deadline, they're running out of time. And looking at the awkward way Makoto scratches the back of his shoulder, Fumiko wonders if they can really keep their spirits up that long.

...Wonders if goodwill is even the reason this is so important to her in the first place.

---

"Excuse me?"

"I…-"

"What the hell is into you today!? There is something seriously wrong with you, lady. You think I really don't understand you?"

"I'm just saying-"

"You think I'm not capable of understanding you!?"

---

On Thursday, they talk to the others: the candidates running against them. Yoshito'd certainly went about it in an unnecessary way, but Fumiko's starting to think maybe he'd had the right idea in talking to his competitors. She wants to know what she's up against... both to give herself an edge, and to maybe understand why she wants to do this just a little bit better.

By day four, Rin looks like she's been hit by a bus. To her complete and utter distress, Kazuki's still treating the whole campaign like a big fat joke. When interviewed alone, she buries her head in her hands, and bemoans, "I didn't even want to run with him in the first place. He was just one of the only boys left!" she sounds half ready to cry. "Why is this whole position decided by gender, anyways!? I think two girls should be able to run!"

"I…" Fumiko blinks. She has a point. Especially in Nagisa's classroom, where gender-roles seem to have gone out the window decades ago. What is with that!? "...will bring that up to him if we win. As… one of the general concerns of the classroom. You will not be mentioned by name. Here's to seeing if we can make some change."

It hardly seems to reassure the distressed Rin, but she does relax a little when Fumiko places a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"You don't need to say you won't mention me…" she whispers with a tired laugh. "He'll know that concern's coming from me. But… while you're doing that, can you please ask Shiota-sensei to expand the classroom library, if possible? That's literally all I want. That's the entire reason I'm running. I've read every book he has back there, and I'm bored out of my mind. I can't afford books of my own. Please, Fumiko. I'm begging you."

"I'll… see what I can do."

When asked about his own desires, Kazuki simply expresses the want for a classroom waterslide. That request, however, is swiftly dismissed with a flip of Fumiko's middle finger. Makoto scrambles to smack her hand down, laughing nervously as he reassures that she probably didn't mean that.

"No," Fumiko says. "I definitely did."

Kazuki winks and returns his own middle finger.

Ugh! Weirdo!

It turns out everyone has a little something they'd like if possible. Of course, some requests are a little (or a lot) bigger than others, but just about everyone in the class has an idea they can pitch.

"Longer lunches," Komoshi says. "Not… uh… like in an exploitative way, if Shiota-sensei is worried about that. Just five minutes or so," he specifies, scratching at his nose. "Sometimes I don't have enough time to finish up all of my meal…"

"More animals!" Rosey declares. "Mary and Korokohai and the girls are so sweet, but I'd love to see even more class pets! Like… what about a puppy!? Wouldn't a puppy rule!?"

"No puppies," Minako begs. "That's it. My entire request is that you do not pitch Rosey's request. I am… like… super allergic."

"Duly noted," Fumiko responds.

Ultimately, Rosey and Minako meet in the middle, and decide a hamster would be pretty okay.

"Waterslide," Kazuki repeats for the fourth time today. "Just think about it. That's all I'm saying."

Fumiko decidedly does not think about it.

"I think we should be allowed to use more weapons during our attempts on Shiota-sensei," Ryoka declares with a cock of her head. "I know why we can't bring in our own: Because some guy, like, clocked him with a lamp a few years ago or whatever, but he should at least offer us some more options. I'm so bored of knives and BB guns. He should offer up… like… axes! Ooh! Oooh! Or spears! I'd love spears."

"Spears... spears," Fumiko mutters as she writes that one down. And wondering just what happened to the classroom she swears at one point was a normal fucking teaching enviornment, she circles "MORE WEAPONS" in a big red circle in her notes.

"What did you do to my classroom?" she asks Makoto under her breath one moment when they're alone. There's a laugh to her tone, but he must not pick up on it, because he goes tense when he finally seems to process it's him she's addressing.

"What? Me?" he asks, as if snapping out of a daze.

"Yes, you," she replies, nudging him with her elbow. "I seem to recall a time when everyone in this classroom wasn't obsessed with pumping each other full of lead. What sort of tradition did you start?"

His shoulders relax as he realizes what she's talking about. Letting out a low laugh of his own, he admits "Hey, you can't blame me for that. I only made it like that for a single year. I didn't expect the tradition to stick around! It's Nagisa you should be yelling at for keeping this place a bloodbath. He's been a teacher way longer than I ever was."

...Huh! A terrible thought! She'd never quite realized it before, but Nagisa really has been a teacher longer now than the two of them ever were combined , huh? She hates that, actually! As such, she decides to tuck that factoid away in the back of her brain and never think about it again. Otherwise she thinks she'll start dissociating.

"Over my dead body," she says with a snort. "Besides, I suppose it's sort of nice: this dumb thing you've started. Our classmates seem to like it, at least."

"You included?" Makoto asks, a hopeful lilt to his voice.

"Of course," Fumiko says, remembering the euphoria she felt the first time she stabbed Nagisa in the back. "Me included."

Some of their classmates' requests' are far less goofy. In fact, they quickly cross the line into downright upsetting! All the same, Fumiko writes them down, trying her best to hide a horrified grimace.

"I guess I just wish… we had someone we could talk to," Terumi admits with a sigh. "...Like, anonymously. Shiota-sensei's really nice, but I'm always afraid he's gonna make such a big deal of my issues if I talk to him. I don't want him to cause the end of the world over me. I'd just like to get it off of my chest."

"Yeah," Emiko says when approached on the topic. "...I've been through some pretty serious things. I think we all have. But I don't want him to, like… become stressed about it or whatever. He already does so much for us. I don't want what's wrong with me to be the reason he, like… stays awake at night."

"It's not that he's anything less than patient," Aina reassures. "He's very nice. I guess I just… don't want to be a burden?"

"And I'm a little scared of what I'll do after if I become too used to this luxury," Minako points out. "If he helps us too much now, what are we going to do for the rest of our lives? I want to become someone who can fight for myself."

...All notions - Feelings - Fumiko understands well. What are they if not the same fears she feels every day? The terror of becoming a burden, and the uncertainty that a support system will last. But still… it breaks her heart to hear her classmates feel the same. And through no flaw of Nagisa's - through no unwillingness to be welcoming enough. Simply because being a kid - being a person- is goddamn scary.

She's starting to wonder if maybe she hadn't done all that bad back then. That she simply set out to accomplish what was an impossible feat.

Does she really want to do this?

...Not becoming class representative. That's a silly, goofy, thing. (Although to be honest, she's starting to wonder if she's maybe not ready for that, either.) But being a teacher. Is that really all it is? Being unable to make a change?

She doesn't know. But all the same, she writes down each and every request her classmates pitch. The reasonable, the goofy, and the horrifying. Because no matter how much they hurt her heart or make her want to roll her eyes, they have to be important to someone. And even if she isn't cut out for this position - even if she doesn't deserve it - She'll do everything in her power to help Nagisa hear their voices.

She thinks that's why Kanon and Yoshito are starting to make her so mad. She overhears them aggravating her classmates... asking them what they're unsatisfied about… if they, too, are sick of how the classroom is run... and she thinks she's going to burst. Their peers already have so much to stress about! So many individual traumas and worries. Who do these assholes think they are to extrapolate on that?

To prey on that?

That's all it is. Taking advantage of the sadness around them. And out of what? Spite!? Bitterness!? How shallow can they get!?

...At least that's what Fumiko think until she overhears Riko call the two of them out. It's Thursday afternoon and they're discussing something or another, circling her desk like sharks, when she finally asks them what the hell is wrong with them.

Yoshito stops in place, his shoes squeaking against the hardwood floor as he freezes. Kiyoshi nudges Fumiko and points over his shoulder. Her head turns and she watches carefully as whatever this is goes down.

"Excuse me?" Yoshito asks, his voice stiff.

"I said what is wrong with you?" Riko repeats. "You keep asking me what's upsetting me. What I'm angry about. Like you have any right to that information. And for what? Because you have some grudge against Shiota-sensei?"

"I don't-" Yoshito sputters. "It's not a grudge."

"Yes. It is. And if it's not against him, then it's against those two." Riko points a finger towards Fumiko and Makoto, shaking her head and grumbling. "Seriously. What is wrong with you? What on earth did they do?"

"What- what did they do?" Yoshito asks, his voice quivering. "They're entitled! They… they think they deserve everything. And Shiota-sensei thinks so, too!"

Suddenly, Fumiko feels awfully put on the stand. Makoto freezes up, his arm going stiff, and she bolts to her feet, hr lips drawn back into a snarl. She opens her mouth to speak - To defend the two of them - But Riko beats her to it.

"Oh, can it!" she snaps. "Maybe Shiota-sensei is nice to them because they actually act like they can stand him. Look at you! He put this entire thing together for us, and everyone else i s having a good time. But instead you're finding another thing to complain about. Are you out of your mind?"

Yoshito freezes, his breath hitching in his throat. And he seems to stare through Riko. Hand gently shaking, he growls "Maybe… maybe I am! And maybe… maybe that's why he doesn't like me. And I can see that. And you can call me mean or entitled or delusional for that, but I see what's happening. And I guess I just assumed… someone else felt the same."

Before anyone else can speak, he whips around, storming off towards his desk. And under his breath he only whispers one last phrase:

"I'm sorry I just wanted to feel happy here."

...The rest of them watch him go.

"I'm sorry," Kanon says in a low voice. Her eyes are fixed on Riko. "He's… he's been having a hard time lately. He doesn't mean those things." Nervously, she fiddles with her hands. "You shouldn't have said those things either, though."

Somewhere across the room Yoshito is staring at the wall.

"...I think you really hurt his feelings."

"Well," Riko says, pinching the bridge of her nose. "They have feelings, too. I think you should tell him to consider that."

Kanon pauses and frowns, as if considering that herself. And then without another word she turns back around. She makes her way over to Yoshito and pulls a chair up, placing a gentle hand on his back.

Makoto, Kiyoshi and Riko are talking. About what just happened. But Fumiko can't focus on their words. She's too busy watching Yoshito and Kanon talk about something or another she can't understand. Watching the way Yoshito jolts at her touch, and how he soon returns to staring at the wall, an all too bitter look on his face.

But Fumiko can spot something more.

...The way that no matter how angry he tries to pretend he is, he still blinks back tears.

He has one leg up on his seat. He blinks fast. And as he turns back to look Kanon's way, Fumiko knows just the sort of upset he feels in his chest.

How could she not? Hurt people hurt people. Angry people - angry kids no less don't act out for no reason. They act out because they're jealous. They act out because they're sad. They act out because it's learned behavior.

...They act out because people his age don't call themselves mean… or entitled… or delusional without having heard that from someone else's mouth.

This ordinary, stupid and unremarkable bitch would know all about that.

She still doesn't know how to talk to him. It's not her place. Not something she has any right to ask him about, or something she's even close to prepared for handling. But it does give her just a little bit more empathy. And it does give her just a bit of an idea. Because she thinks she knows what Yoshito needs more than anything. And it's something she could use a bit of as well.

...Well, at the very least she's come up with her rule.

---

"...I just think you don't want to!"

"Really? Because I think I understand you perfectly well. You wanna hear what you really are? What sort of impression I've gotten?"

"Please don't-"

"Of course you don't want to hear it. Of course you don't want criticism. Of course you don't want the truth. Because you are a delusional, narcissistic know-it-all with a messiah complex. You think you are better than everyone. You think you are smarter than everyone. You think the only perfect world is one where everyone behaves exactly like you. And you can try to hide that behind a cutesy face. Behind an innocent 'I just want the best for you.' But I know who you really are. And you are someone who thinks I am broken. You are not special just because you're passiona-"

"I do not think you're broken!"

"DON'T INTERRUPT ME!"

---

On Friday morning, campaign speeches soon approach. Nagisa lets them know that voting will commence after they finish, so to please do their best in getting through to their classmates. Fumiko's not sure if her best is very good at all, but she's damn well prepared to try. And as such… she raises her hand, quietly stands, and asks if she could please go first.

Nagisa nods. "Of course," he says. "Go right ahead."

She leads Makoto up towards the front of the classroom, trying her best to ignore the stare of their classmates. Kiyoshi gives them a nervous thumbs-up, and Nagisa tells them they can start whenever they'd like. But Fumiko's gaze just keeps drifting and drifting back to the way Yoshito stares through her.

...She'll prove him wrong. For her sake and his.

"...As you know, the two of us are running for class representatives. But so are many other people in this classroom," she begins. "And because of that you may ask yourself 'What can you do for us?' 'What did you do to deserve this position?' 'How are you different from any of us?' And while I'm still not sure I have a concrete answer, I have spent the past week thinking those questions over. And I have… some sort of conclusion, at the very least."

"The answer is: I'm not. I'm not any different than a single one of you. We're all students of Constellate Junior High, and while we're all here for some reason or another, I believe those reasons to actually be rather similar. We're here because we're scared. Because we're alone, or because we felt we needed help. And it was Shiota-sensei who offered that help to us. Of course… he hasn't always been perfect, but he's done everything within his power to give us the support we need. And that is why I would like to repay the favor."

"...At the beginning of this school year, I was a deeply unhappy person. I was terrified of what others thought of me, and because of that, I became judgemental and bitter. I pushed everyone I could away. And I thought myself better than others - a hilarious notion, considering I, at the same time, saw myself as less than dirt. But there are a few people who met me during this time and even still refused to be deterred by my abhorrent demeanor."

"One of them, Kiyoshi Karasuma. I suppose I shouldn't say too many words, because he hates the attention, but trust me when I say I'd have fought with everything in my power to have him standing beside me today if he'd actually wanted a position of leadership. He was… the first person I found myself able to open up to. And although I know this is going to fluster him, I want him to know I'm thankful for him every day."

Sure enough, Kiyoshi reaches up to cover his face with his hands. But as every eye in the classroom flits towards him, even his blush is unable to mask a flattered smile.

"Another, Makoto Himura. Where Kiyoshi was a quiet, comforting figure in my life, Makoto took me by the hand and dragged me right out of my comfort zone. At first, I despised him a little for this, but the more he helped me grow the more I was able to discover about myself. Even on the days when I was gloomy and cruel, he always greeted me with a smile. That is why I believe he deserves to be up here running for this position with me today. Makoto believes in everyone, and he's the best at helping others see that. He's bright, he's sweet, and he's a wonderful leader. He's... the sort of person I want to be more like every day.."

There's this indecipherable expression on Makoto's face as he stares at her, jaw dropped. But he doesn't speak. Simply shakes his head and grins, taking a step closer to her.

"And finally… Shiota-sensei. While my friends are lovely… I wouldn't trade them for the world, Shiota-sensei is a special sort of important to me. He was the first adult to believe in me. The first adult to tell me that others treating me like garbage wasn't normal, and the first adult to tell me that I deserved so much more than I was letting myself have. He's always - and I mean always - believed in me, and I sincerely doubt I'd be standing up here with the courage to give this speech in the first place if not for his constant support."

"...But Shiota-sensei isn't for everyone. Shiota-sensei isn't capable of helping everyone. And that's okay. Sometimes personalities don't mesh. Sometimes certain people don't feel comfortable coming to him for support for one reason or another. And that's fine, I suppose. It's nothing for him to beat himself up over. But it is something I've thought about extensively, and what's driven the rule I've come up with to suggest for our classroom."

"Because everyone deserves a Shiota-sensei. And everyone deserves to feel what he's helped me feel standing up here today. That is why… what I wish to request from Shiota-sensei… even more than waterslides or expanded libraries or any possible assortment of weapons… is for a school counselor."

"I'm delighted Shiota-sensei has been here for me. And I'm sure there's many other people he'll be there for in the future. But he can't do everything alone. No-one can. He's part of the reason I managed to get that fact through my thick skull. And as such… I believe it would be for the best that he get someone to be able to talk to us about the things we maybe don't feel comfortable telling him."

"Not because of any fault of his. Not because he's not doing well enough or somehow isn't living up to some legacy. Because everyone needs a little help. And the better support system we have here… well… the better I believe we'll all be. Towards ourselves and towards others."

She can hardly believe her ears… that she's truly speaking this aloud. But she's spent the past twenty-four hours thinking it over, and slowly but surely her conclusion has become concrete. That no-one in this classroom is evil. No-one in this classroom is broken. But that Shiota-sensei isn't capable of fixing every issue the twenty-six of them have. That Yoshito is right. And that… he doesn't need to be cruel about it. He doesn't need to push Nagisa to his breaking point. All he needs to do is tell him what their teacher's been telling them all year:

'You're not in this alone.'

...She'd briefly wondered if there was anything she could do. If she was capable of helping - of fixing - everyone around her. But as she met Yoshito's hateful eyes… she realized it's not her place. Maybe he's never gonna want help from her. And that's okay. She's already told herself she's never gonna become a happiness sink ever again. But the least she can do is offer up an opportunity for everyone else to get some help, even if it's not from her own mouth.

And watching the class stare at her… eyes wide with wonder, she finally knows why she wants to do this. Why she wanted to do this back then, and why she thinks she'll always want to reach out for this dream.

She doesn't want to become a class representative because she's entitled. Nostalgic, sure, but deep down, that's not even the main reason. She wants to become a class representative because teachers - Because leaders are never obsolete. And because people never stop needing help. She will never push herself to her breaking point again. But she'll also never stop loving people. And because of that, she'd like to be able to foster an environment where people can love themselves, too.

"I know that sounds saccharine. Maybe even forced. But I swear I mean every word I've spoken up here. Because I have been in all of your shoes. And next, I would like to step into Shiota-sensei's. To say 'thanks' for everything he's done for me, and to reach a hand out to you. One day I'd like to run a classroom, just like he does. And, well… I think this is a good start."

"You don't have to believe in me. You don't have to like me. But… that's the full and honest truth. I have… grand plans for my future. And I believe… you should, too. Because… I'm sure a very long time ago people like Shiota-sensei felt just like us. Believed they'd never accomplish anything. But look at all they've already set out to accomplish."

...She looks out across the classroom, and she sees the twenty-five of them for a brief moment. Nagisa sitting near the front of the class, and nervously twirling a strand of hair around his finger. Okuda staring at the floor, and Karma standing up only to place a tack on her seat.

But they fade. With fifteen years, they fade. They grow up, and they move on, and they do great things. And now, they no longer sit in front of her. Instead, she stares out across the classroom at an entirely new set of faces.

Yoshito with his stun-shocked face. Kazuki on his phone, and Riko clasping her fingers as she looks up at her. Chiharu anxiously drums his fingers on his desk, and Kiyoshi meets Fumiko's eyes.

The E-Class… they've already had their stories told, with or without her. But wonderful people will never stop making strides each and every day.

"...You're going to do great things, I just know it. And I can't wait to see what you-" No. "What we can accomplish."

And all at once that energy drains out of her. Finished with her tirade - done speaking from the heart, she runs out of words. And looking out at her classmates, she feels a nervous exhaustion overtake her body.

She'd really gotten up there and said all of that… hadn't she?

...Huh. Oddly enough, she's almost proud of herself.

She gives a curt bow. Mumbles something about how she hopes they'll consider her. And she glances towards Makoto, biting her lip. But before she can ask him if there's anything he'd like to add on, he speaks.

"...Thank you indeed," he says. "Honestly… uh… I don't have any great qualifications for this," he admits, scratching at his arm. "Any cool future plans or things I'm going to do. But… Fumiko wanted to do this with me. And, well… as you all heard, she's… she's going to do some really wonderful things. Whatever it is she accomplishes, I just want to be by her side for it. I… hope that's not too much to ask."

He almost seems nervous for a second, but quickly shrugs it off. Flashing Fumiko a smile, he gives a bow as well, and then hurries back towards his seat.

"Was that an okay way to end a speech?" he asks.

"...I have no clue!" Fumiko admits. "I just… I just hope they think we did well."

"Are you kidding me?" Makoto says. "You did great."

And that indecipherable expression has become one of wonder. He stares at her, reaches out for her hand, and squeezes it so tight she has to tell him to cut it out. But all the same, she feels a warm feeling in her chest. As someone who's spent all year looking up to Makoto, it feels nice to be the one taking charge for once.

"That's not too much to ask, you know," she whispers. "I'll always need you here."

"I know," he whispers back. "But I didn't mean of you. I meant of them."

...And as he slides back into his seat, Makoto motions to the rest of the class.

They're looking at them, stunned. And as Fumiko meets Yoshito's eyes, she thinks she even catches a little bit of wonder in them, too.

Ultimately, Rin proclaims she's dropping out. Sighing deeply, she glares at Kazuki, and says that although this campaign was admittedly kinda fun, she doesn't think she'd let that maniac obtain a position of power for all the libraries in the world.

Nagisa understands. And when she voices her concerns that maybe two girls should be allowed to run next year, he agrees. As sweet of a duo as Megu and Isogai made, not everyone can be held to the same standards. It's time to smash the patriarchy. And if two girls (Or two boys, for that matter) would like to run together next time, he'll allow it.

...Love wins, Fumiko supposes?

Not that - Gah! Not that running for class representative with someone is an indication of anything! It was a joke! It was just a damn joke!

She bites her tongue and resents herself for the thought, even as Yoshito and Kanon step up to give their own speech.

Her embarrassment quickly fades into shock, however, as they reach the end of their speech, and don't say what they were planning to about their teacher.

Instead, they merely reiterate that they'll consider the needs of the class, and that they want a place where everyone's struggles are perceived equally. But never once, even as Yoshito's fist clenches, do they insinuate that this is Nagisa's fault.

In the end they simply take a bow of their own... and sit down without another word.

Fumiko doesn't understand. She supposes it's entirely possible that they'd just been trying to scare her, but it hadn't felt like that at the time. The vitriol Yoshito held towards their teacher... it had felt palpable. There's no way he could have managed to fake that. But if it hadn't been a fabrication… then…-

When voting time comes around, he pulls her outside.

She notes just how unprofessional this whole classroom environment is when Nagisa doesn't even bat an eye. But when Yoshito asks to talk with her alone out in the hallway, Fumiko obliges.

She doesn't know why. She still can't really stand this guy. But she supposes she's trying harder to see the bigger picture nowadays.

"If you're here to argue with me," she warns. "I won't just sit down and take it. I'm not interested in being your enemy. And if the two of us win, we earned it. Don't you dare accuse us of-"

"I voted for you."

"Pardon?"

"You heard me," Yoshito says flatly. And as Fumiko asks him to explain what exactly the hell he's on about, he props himself up against the wall, watching her carefully.

"Then… then what was that?" she asks. "That whole show about Shiota-sensei!? Did you just want to start something? Impress your lame friends? Because that is not funny. You made me think you hated him!"

"Oh," Yoshito says, one foot kicked up against the wall. "I did. Still do. But seems I gave you two a little too credit.

"And that- that means?"

"It means I didn't realize you had any actual balls on you. I meant everything I said. About thinking life came easy to you two. You three, even, if you count the little guy."

"Kiyoshi."

"Yeah. Whatever," Yoshito says. "That's not the point. I think… I was being a little bit presumptuous. About what you people are like. About why you wanted that position." He shifts slightly. "...This is genuinely really important to you, isn't it?"

Fumiko shrugs. "I think so," she says. "I mean… I'm still trying to figure out what I want to do, but I have some ideas. And this might just be a start for me."

...She hates being put on the spot like this. Much less in front of this asswipe of all people. But at the very least he's not coming off as particularly hostile. If anything, with his tapping foot and avoidant gaze, he strikes her as more open than she's ever seen him.

"Did you mean what you said? About wanting to be a teacher?" he asks.

"Mmmm," Fumiko repeats. "...Didn't come to the conclusion until recently, but…-"

"I wish you'd have just said that from the start."

"Ex- excuse me?" Fumiko asks. "It's not- It's not my job to project that to the world. It's not my obligation to share that with you. I'm not even certain. I just thought-"

"That it would be nice to help people?"

Fumiko pauses. "Huh?"

"You thought it'd be nice to help people. That's all, right?"

"...I mean, yeah," Fumiko says. "Why wouldn't I-"

"Than that's what you should have said from the beginning. Scratch the other thing. Though on second thought, I'm not sure I'd have believed you."

"About-? About caring about people?"

"Mmm," Yoshito admits. "...Never admitted I was beyond acting like an asshole, too. But I guess I just saw you walking around with your terrible attitude and your gratuitous wealth and your popular friends and assumed there was no way you could give a shit. But seeing you step up there to talk about it… wow, man. You have had it hard, too, haven't you?"

Fumiko shrugs. She's not entirely interested in disclosing any of that to this guy, but...

"Of course I have. I think everyone in this class has. That's why… that's why I think it's such a shitty thing to do to diss Shiota-sensei like that. Of course he's not perfect. Of course he's gonna screw it up. But at least he's doing something. At least he's trying. Most people don't. Most people won't."

"Sometimes it feels like seeing someone try and fail is more frustrating than seeing someone not try at all. I don't know," Yoshito admits. "...But you're right. I decided not to say that to his face. If he's so important to you lot, then I don't want to break that illusion. Lord knows we'll all take whatever we can get."

Fumiko raises an eyebrow. She still hates his tone, but only because it's one she knows well. It's aloof and above it all and oh-so-cynical. But that's just how you tend to sound when you're hurt, and don't know how to express it in a way that's vulnerable yet.

"...Mmm," she simply says. "Thank you for that. And not for my sake. For his. Just because he's a grown-up doesn't mean it doesn't hurt when people say things like that about him. He really cares about you." She pauses. "He really cares about all of us."

"Mmm," Yoshito says back.

"But there's one thing I still don't get. Yeah, sure… you understand me a little better. You even decided not to take your frustrations out on Shiota-sensei. But why did you vote for us?"

Yoshito laughs a bitter, sardonic laugh. And Fumiko finally realizes just what's getting to her about this kid. It's not that he's angry or bitter or even just mean. It's that he's right smack dab in the middle of his chuunibyou phase. She's not sure how many 'tch'es she can bear to listen to before she fucking explodes.

"Why did I vote for you?" he asks, sliding back further down the wall. "...Because honestly, I didn't care much about the position in the first place. Kanon neither. I'm actually… really terrible with people. The only reason I stepped up to the plate is because I didn't want you to get the position. But now that… I know you have this in the bag, I don't have much of a reason to pretend anymore."

Fumiko softly reminds herself that she has what is basically an extra 25 years of knowledge on this thirteen-year-old boy, and decides not to make fun of his Sarada-adjacent behavior. Instead, she'll point out the real gaping hole in his logic here.

"...Then… you were being a hypocrite."

And with that, it's Yoshito's turn to ask "Pardon?"

"All that nonsense you said. About us being entitled. About wanting whatever Shiota-sensei handed out just to snatch it from you. You really were talking about yourself. Or at least acting pretty damn blindsided. You saw something we wanted, and you tried to take it just because you c-"

"Yes. I did," Yoshito interrupts, face bright red. He bites his lip. Hard "But I dropped it, okay? As… as soon as I realized this was actually important to you, I ended up feeling like a massive asshole. I didn't mean to - I didn't mean to cross a line."

Fumiko snorts. "Well, you certainly still did. For the record."

"I know," Yoshito admits, wilting. "And - uh - I'm sorry about that." It's far from the most sincere apology, with his averted gaze and the awkward way he scratches at his arm, but Fumiko will take it.

"It's… uh. Fine," she says. "Just… cut it out from now on? Whatever it is you have against the three of us. And whatever it is you have against Shiota-sensei, too."

"Of course," Yoshito says, bowing his head. "If that's all you have to ask of me-"

"It's most certainly not. This is where I'd like a formal apology. Written essay is preferred. 12 point font. Two pages, with a full deconstruction of your misbehavior."

Yoshito stares.

"That was. A joke. For the record. I was joking."

"Oh," Yoshito says, looking like he's just had a hundred-pound weight lifted from his shoulders. Eyes wide and bewildered, he admits, "It is impossible to tell with that tone of yours."

"Maybe that's the point," Fumiko says with a scoff.

...Finally, Yoshito smirks. Visibly relaxing, he lets out a tiny laugh. And a genuine one, at that.

"You know… I think that attitude will help you out."

Fumiko blinks. "Pardon?"

"With becoming a teacher," Yoshito says. "I mean… if that ultimately ends up being what you want to do. I'm sure Shiota-sensei's a fine guy, but…" he pauses. "He's too much for me. His attitude. It's patronizing. Sometimes… it's hard to hear 'oh, but I believe in you.' or 'you can do anything you set out to accomplish' when you can hardly get out of bed in the morning. Those things… they just don't feel true. It can be a lot nicer to receive the blunt truth, as ass-backwards as that sounds."

"No," Fumiko says. "I get it. And noted! I'll make sure to have my future students write a two-page essay on why I'm the realest teacher they've ever had. Seeing as how it seems to have worked so effectively on you."

Yoshito sputters. "That's-! That's not what I meant!"

"Isn't it, though?" Fumiko asks.

Yoshito groans and buries his face in his hands.

Fumiko glances towards the doorway. She should really get heading back into class soon. But not before she notes one more thing.

"...You know, you're welcome there. If you ever really need it. Shiota-sensei's place, I mean. It's not just our stomping ground. He's made that clear from the beginning of the year. It can be your refuge, too."

Yoshito shakes his head. "...Nah. No thanks," he says. "For someone who's acted like such a jealous bitch, honestly… I'm not too interested in having what you have. Shiota-sensei's already given me a lot of extra leeway. Privilege or whatever. Walked me to school and everything. But it's just not my thing. Like I said: I just don't vibe with the guy."

"...Thank you for the offer, though," he quickly tacks on. "Maybe that really is proof you deserve this position. Lord knows I wouldn't have offered it to you if we'd won."

"Hey," Fumiko says. "Don't give up yet. We still don't know how the voting turned out. For all we care you did win."

Yoshito rubs his temples. "Good Lord. Wouldn't that be the worst?" he muses. "Nah. I think this is much more up your alley. I'm sure your classmates will see that." He pauses. "...Even if your campaign partner lacks a little passion."

Fumiko frowns. "I'm- I'm not sure what you mea-"

"Makoto. He wasn't the one who stepped up there to give a speech. He said he just wanted to do a fun thing with his friend. And while there's nothing wrong with that... " He shakes his head. "Just? Don't push him too far, okay?"

Now Fumiko feels like he's putting words in his mouth, but she's not in the mood to get in another argument with this kid. She knows how passionate Makoto is, even if he hates conflict. Even if he can be a little shy.

"I won't," she promises.

"Good," Yoshito says. "Now let's get back to your domain."

He doesn't wait for a response before sauntering back to the classroom. Fumiko follows soon after, peeking her head into the room.

"Hey!" Nagisa says, craning his head towards them. "Just the two I was looking for. Sit down. I was just about to look over the votes."

Fumiko nods, returning to her seat and sliding in next to Makoto. Nagisa, in the meantime, reaches out for a shoebox he's placed on the front of his desk. Only now does Fumiko seem to realize this is the same goddamn shoebox he used for Secret Santa, but there's no calling him out on it, because he's already on his feet. Shoebox slung under his arm, he races towards the chalkboard.

"I'll be reading votes aloud. Although of course, I won't reveal who voted for who even if I do recognize your handwriting because that would be a blatant breach of voter-government anonymity. I will also be keeping tally on the board, so please pay full attention."

Most of the class does not. Needless to say this project is a bit of a miss compared to Nagisa's track record of home runs, but Fumiko appreciates it at the very least. As Nagisa reads each vote aloud, marking each candidate's side with tally marks on the board, her eyes remain glued to the count. As they reach vote ten and then vote fifteen, her name spoken seven of those fifteen times.

Sixteen. Seventeen. Eighteen.

Makoto shifts slightly, sending her a nervous glance. But when she meets his eyes, he musters a smile, even as Nagisa marks down the nineteenth vote.

How many times has he said their name now? She does the mental math in her head. Counts the tallies as quickly as she can. But he's already onto twenty. Does she see her name eleven times?

Twenty-one. Twenty-two. Twenty-three, and, finally, twenty-four.

With a deep sigh of relief, Fumiko watches Nagisa draw the chalk across the board one final time, bringing their tally to thirteen. Thirteen to Yoshito and Kanon's eleven. They've won!

She thinks Nagisa announces their victory, but she hardly hears it. There's this ringing in her ears as she reaches out to high five Makoto. He just barely makes it, meeting her palm with his wrist and an awkward laugh as she descends upon him like a rabid animal.

"Did we- did we really do it?" he asks, glancing back towards the board as if he hasn't fully processed it.

"Hell yeah we did it!" Fumiko replies through a gleeful laugh. And meeting Makoto's shocked eyes, she feels on top of the world. Because she honestly didn't know if she could do this. But she could. She could! And that means so many people believe in her.

More than anything she wants to wrap Makoto in a hug. Declare their victory a thousand times more, and shout it from the rooftops. But as every eye in the classroom is glued to them, she resists, and instead settles for giving him another high five.

He makes it this time. Though he quickly yanks his hand back, hissing in through his teeth.

"Holy heck, dude!" he says. "Your high fives hurt!"

And Kiyoshi chimes in behind him. "That's what I've been saying!"

Fumiko gives a sheepish laugh, drawing her hand back and murmuring a meek apology. But as Makoto tells her it's nothing, she turns to Kiyoshi with a snide expression.

"Is that really all you've got for us? After all our hard work? After we just won? Insulting my high-fives? Jeez, Kiyoshi, that's weak, even for an insult. Some way to say congratulations."

"A-ah!" Kiyoshi sputters. "No! It wasn't - It wasn't an insult! I didn't mean to - I was going to- shit! I was going to say 'good job,' I swear!"

Fumiko chuckles. "I know, Kiyoshi. It's fine. I'm just pulling your leg."

"Well - well either way... I mean it. Congratulations, that is. You guys did a lot of hard work to make it to this point. I hope you like it!"

Fumiko's not sure if a week of 'campaign PR' and catfighting with Yoshito qualifies as hard work, but she appreciates his kind words nevertheless. She thanks him and offers up another high five. Although she's careful to be gentle with him this time.

The rest of their classmates murmur congratulations. Riko cheers, and Kazuki groans, bemoaning the 'inherent unfairness of the democratic system.' Yoshito coughs, whispering 'congratulations… or whatever,' under his breath, and Nagisa makes his way over to the two of them.

He admits that it's not exactly a legitimately glorious position. If anything, it's a little pointless. But he hopes they learned something about themselves and about their classmates in the process of running. Additionally, yes, he'll be seeing about getting Fumiko's rule instated.

"Admittedly… that's not what I expected you to ask me for, but it's a… valid request. I'm going to have to do screening because I don't want just anyone working at my school, but… I'll try my very best to have a counselor in the building by the end of third trimester."

Fumiko nods. "...That's all I could possibly ask of you."

And even having won something so pointless… Fumiko feels proud of herself. Because she set a goal for herself, and she accomplished it. Because Makoto tells her 'awesome job.' And because Yoshito looks at her from across the room and gives her an awkward thumbs up.

Worthless or not, a position like that just has to mean a little something.

---

"I don't! I would never-"

"You pity me. I don't want your scorn. I don't want your sympathy. I don't want to be like you. I don't need you. You. Need. Me. The only reason why you are where you are today is because of me. The only reason your family is where they are today is because of me! Why do you always need to step out of line? Why do you always need to say the one thing you know you don't need to say!?"

"Because I want to care about you!"

---

...Makoto doesn't know what he's doing.

He says he does. That he's prepared for just about anything. That he's cheery, and he's optimistic, and that he can always find an upside. But he doesn't. And he hates it. Because he's not supposed to be the downer friend.

Watching Fumiko run so passionately past him, her own dreams clutched tightly in hand, he wonders if he's ever gonna know what he really wants to do.

She spends the rest of the day on cloud nine. Applauding herself, and applauding him. Telling him what an awesome job they did. But he just feels so… empty about it. Like he hadn't really tried. Like he doesn't really deserve this.

When she suggested becoming class representatives, he'd hesitated. And when Nagisa had suggested running, he'd crossed his fingers, and hoped maybe he'd lose.

...Nope. Never by her side.

It's not that he wants to shit on her dreams. Never! He thinks… he thinks she's going to do some really wonderful things. He's just not sure… he's capable of doing the same?

He doesn't know. It's stupid. He hasn't felt like this before. He's not some… insecure person. He just feels so weird about this whole thing.

...About being in charge of this classroom again.

When Fumiko asks him to talk with him alone, he hesitates a second time. But like any good friend, he complies. Meets up with her after school, and tells Kiyoshi they'll regroup with him at the base of the mountain.

"It won't take long," Fumiko swears. "I just want to talk with him about some… uh… y'know, stuff. I hope that's not weird."

"No, no-" Kiyoshi reassures. "That's not weird at all. If you have something from back then you don't feel comfortable sharing, then it's not my place to pry. I'll… uh… see you soon."

"Only a few minutes-" Fumiko promises. "It's not a big deal, I swear."

But as Makoto watches her pace from foot to foot… Nervously shuffle and fiddle with her scarf, he wonders if this might just be something huge after all.

Kiyoshi goes without another word.

"So… what is it?" Makoto asks. "That you wanted to talk about."

"Uh… maybe we should sit down somewhere first," Fumiko admits. And her eyes flit towards the school. "Actually, I have the perfect idea. Follow me."

She gives a lazy motion for him to follow. Struts towards the school, and props her foot up against one of the wooden planks.

Taking hold of the windowsill, she pulls herself up and scales the side of the building.

Standing proudly on the roof, she holds a hand out. Makoto takes it as he hops up onto the windowsill, clutching like his life depends on it as she pulls him up towards the sky and onto steady ground.

She sits down, motioning for him to follow. Legs dangling off of the building, she smiles.

"Pretty niche spot, but I figured no-one was gonna overhear us up here."

Makoto nods, plopping down next to her. He keeps one leg curled up by his side, the other hanging down off the roof.

...Right next to hers.

"Yeah, no way. School roof in the middle of winter? It's pretty much the most obscure hangout spot you can get."

For a chilly day, it's actually pretty nice out. The sun peeks through the barren trees as it sets, casting a beautiful light over the horizon.

Fumiko lets out a small laugh. Turns her head and asks, "Remember when you first climbed up here? How I screamed at you at the top of your lungs and told you you were gonna break your neck?"

"How could I forget?" Makoto asks. It had been so much fun blundering around on the school roof. Now that he thinks about it, hadn't that been the same day Fumiko'd let him take shelter in her home?

That was before he really knew Nagisa. Before he really knew Fumiko or Kiyoshi or any of them. Before he even knew who he really was. He'd felt so carefree.

"...Crazy how much things change."

"I know, right?" Fumiko responds. "Back then I was so scared to follow you. Convinced I'd, like… get in trouble, or trip and fall. But look at us now!"

Nagisa's held lessons up here since then. At least a good dozen. Makoto'd watched Fumiko as she'd slowly become more and more acclimated to the roof. First shaking like a leaf as Nagisa held her hand tight, then, all those months later, pulling herself up all by herself, without a single ounce of fear.

"...We sure have come a long way," he notes. For better or for worse, however, he's not sure. "I'm proud of you."

Fumiko smiles. And it's a warm, happy smile. Makoto's certain of one thing: She's changed for the better, at the very least. She seems so much happier these days.

Even during moments of fear, it makes his heart feel warm.

"I still remember what you told me," she says, eyes drifting back towards the horizon. "You said you felt like king of the world up here. I'm not sure I got it at the time… but…"

"You do now?"

"Mmmm."

Makoto kicks his feet gently. "I actually remembered for one of the first times up here," he muses. "Think it was the same day. I was standing up here thinking 'What a wonderful place this is.' 'It just feels so much like home.' And then I just… saw them. It's like you were gone. We were both gone. I was taller… and stronger…" and happier "And I was standing right here. Watching E-Class flood into the school."

"I couldn't believe my eyes. I mean… I'd dreamed about stuff like that before, but until I started going to school here nothing really ever happened in person. It weirded the shit out of me."

Fumiko nods. "I can imagine. The first time I remembered something about being Aguri, I freaked the fuck out. I was scared out of my mind, Makoto. Convinced I was making it up or that someone was going to hurt me again." She sighs and shakes her head. "It was crazy. I feel a lot better now, though. That I know who I am. I feel like I understand the person I've become better than I ever did before I knew I was Aguri."

...A sentiment Makoto wishes he could share.

He smiles wide and nods. "Yeah. Same. About being Korosensei, I mean." He knits as his hands. "Before I was so confused about what sort of person I wanted to be. Where I belonged. If I'd ever have a family. But when I arrived at the school… it all just seemed to come together."

And that much is true. Nagisa welcomed him with open arms. The creak of the wooden floorboards and the strong scent of sawdust felt like home. When Nagisa had let it slip that he believed Makoto was Korosensei, he'd been ecstatic. His heart had leapt from his chest. Because everything had finally made sense!

But now it doesn't. With every passing day, Korosensei makes less and less sense. Makoto doesn't even understand how he can manage to loathe the guy and be so jealous of him at the same time.

He resents the things Korosensei did. The people he hurt and all the ways he failed. They make him feel terrible. But at the same time, he looks at Korosensei and sees someone he'll never live up to. Someone who changed Nagisa and Karma and Kayano's lives. Someone who changed the world for the better. And he's become what now? This?

Makoto doesn't have superpowers. He doesn't even have super-intuition. He's not smart, and he's not particularly heroic. He can't see himself changing the world in the same way Korosensei did. So what does that mean? For him? For his future? Is… is the rest of his life really going to be looking back on his glory years?

...He's thirteen, for Pete's sake! He shouldn't be having a midlife crisis!

"You have no idea how excited I was," he continues. "When I was certain. Because I could look back at all the work I did, and say 'it really was worth it.' They really are happy now. All that fighting… all that teaching I did for those kids, they never forgot it. Those scared, insecure students I saw marching into the building with their heads down had gone on to become politicians. Scientists. Business-owners. Superstars! Anything they dreamed of!"

He's quickly starting to realize they've gotten off-topic, but can't find it in him to ask what this conversation was actually supposed to be about. Does it even really matter?

"You think you got excited?" Fumiko asks. "Imagine how surprised I felt! Last I'd seen these kids, they were 'teacher-murdering' delinquents with no hope for their futures!"

"Oh. You think you know about teacher-murdering?" Makoto asks, a sneer to his voice. "I'll do you one better."

Fumiko snickers, falling back. "Touche," she says. "Touche."

...The sun burns bright, and the two of them fall silent.

"I think we should do it all again.."

She says it quietly... quickly, but Makoto overhears. And he freezes up, his blood running cold.

"H-huh?"

"Teaching, I mean," Fumiko quickly specifies, her posture stiff. "Not the other stuff. None of the… drama… or the death… or the letting people hurt us. Just the two of us!" She reaches to take Makoto's hand, clasping it tight. "I meant it. What I said earlier. About wanting to teach again. Maybe even about wanting to teach here. Can you… can you imagine how awesome it'd be if we did it together!?"

Makoto can't find the words. He's… he's shell-shocked. He can't believe what she's asking of him!

"...With… with me?" he incoherently stammers.

"Yes, with you, silly!" Fumiko declares. "I mean… I could do it alone. I think I'm going to either way. But… don't we owe this to ourselves? We were… we were robbed! We never got a chance to live out our dreams together. But now… we… we can! No-one can stop us! Shouldn't we… shouldn't we try? Imagine all that we could accomplish together!"

Makoto stares, his mouth agape.

She wants to… she wants to…- With him!?

Well, he's not really sure he'd like to - He's never thought about being a teac- He probably wouldn't be very good at it. Besides, aren't there- Aren't there already all sorts of people who have that field under control? People like Nagisa! People like Fumiko!

...People like Korosensei.

All the same, Fumiko stares at him with wide, hopeful eyes. She clasps his hands, and grins with this huge, passionate smile. Fingers interlaced with his own "We could change the world," she repeats. And Makoto feels the weight of that very world on his shoulders.

Does he… does he really have the heart to crush her spirit? She says she'll do it on her own, but her face tells a different story. Screams 'I want you here,' and her words say "It just won't be the same without you." Makoto shakes, and Fumiko lets out a nervous laugh, and sure enough, when he himself grins wide and cocks his head, he finds his answer.

"I'd… I'd love to!"

'We owe it to ourselves,' she says. But he knows what he really owes. And he owes it to her. He's already stolen everything from her once before. If he were to shake his head… sneer, and decline her offer? Then… well, he really would be a monster.

"You would!?" Fumiko responds, her breaths quick. And before Makoto can even respond - Seal his fate a second time - she tosses her arms around his neck, and squeezes him so tight he thinks he might just explode. "I just knew you would! I'm so glad I asked!"

"Yeah," Makoto says, deliberately letting the tension seep from his posture. He won't let her know he's hesitated. Not when he's already done that so many times before. "Me too."

He still doesn't know why he feels this way. How something that used to make him so happy has managed to become something that makes him so sad. But it just has. And there's nothing he can do to change that. Nothing except pretend, and shut his eyes tight, and put on the widest smile he can possibly muster.

Because even if Korosensei… if knowing all the things he did and the people he hurt and the feats he accomplished and will never accomplish again doesn't make him happy, he knows what still does. And that's his friends. That will always be his friends.

He doesn't have any plans for his future. He doesn't see any hope for what Makoto could possibly accomplish. In the field of teaching, or a field 900 topics removed. Why shouldn't he settle? At the very least, he might have a chance of making her happy.

Because she's the same. No. She's better. Fumiko carries Aguri's heart and a willpower that's her own and so much more. She's unique and she's brave and she's every bit as beautiful as she was sixteen years ago. Where Makoto's a downgrade… something… wonderful becoming something not, she's anything but. She finds a new way to glow every day. And all she wants to do is have another chance at the dream he stole from her with him by her side. He can't - he won't turn that down.

It doesn't matter if he's happy. It doesn't matter if he's settling. It doesn't matter if he has dreams or if he doesn't. Because he's not Korosensei. He's a shell of his former self. And now all he wants to do is stand by her side and whatever it is she'll accomplish.

...He just knows it'll be something great.

They discuss it for the next fifteen minutes... Fumiko laughing, and squealing, and sharing all the plans she's already made. All the things she already wants to try. And Makoto laughs back, smiling his widest, fakest smile, and telling her he can't wait to be a part of it.

They have to go soon enough. Wouldn't wanna keep Kiyoshi waiting, after all. But before they do, she leans once on his shoulder, and looks at him with the most content look on her face.

"Hey, Reaper?" she says in a voice that he just knows means 'I feel safe.'

"Mm?"

"...I'm really happy you're here."

And biting his lip softly, smiling back… Makoto, the biggest liar on the planet, says "...Yeah. I'm happy I'm here, too."

---

He turns his back to her… And he lets out a bitter, low laugh.

"The fact that you don't already says enough about you in and of itself."

He's not wasting his time a minute longer. It's clear there's nothing else for him in this conversation. He marches towards the door, and only in his one-track minded rage does he manage to ignore what he hears her murmur next.

"...You know what? I do know what you really are. Kotaro..."

And as his fist crashes through the wall...

"…You're just mean."

---

...Things are actually going a lot better for Kiyoshi than he'd expected them to.

His mom heads out in early January, as expected. And it sends sheer terror running down his spine. But as he lays awake late at night, staring up at the ceiling… Makoto shoots him a text with a dumb joke or pun, and he gets his mind off of it for just a moment.

They text for hours, knowing they'll regret it in the morning. But when Makoto shows up to school looking like he's been hit by a bus, he never blames Kiyoshi. Instead, he punches him on the shoulder, calls him a dork, and repeats some ridiculous in-joke from the night before.

Fumiko shows her care in her own way. Kiyoshi lets her know soon after Makoto. What sort of friend would he be if he didn't? They don't keep secrets. And anyways, he knows he needs her support. She makes him half-burnt homemade cookies, admitting they're nothing special, but hoping he likes them anyways. And when she catches him staring at the ground, or gently fiddling with his own hands, she places a hand on his shoulder and promises him that everything is going to be okay.

Mom calls from the airport. Sends him goofy selfies and gossips about the dumb agent seated next to her on the plane. Dad reminds her that this isn't a vacation, and that she needs to be careful, but she shrugs him off and reminds him that she's been embarking on dangerous missions since before they even met. She'll be fine.

She Facetimes them from her destination, and cheekily sticks her tongue out at Dad. Demands to hear about Kiyoshi's school day, and throws a fit when Taro photobombs the camera. But as soon as the 'dumb mutt''s dealt with, she reminds them she loves them, and that she'll be seeing them before they even know it.

"I know," Karasuma says with an assured look.

"...I know," Kiyoshi repeats, trying to muster up some of that same courage.

Fumiko and Makoto run for class representatives. And they end up winning the position with relative ease. Kiyoshi doesn't participate in the whole 'candidate' thing, (God, he thinks he would rather lose his mind) but he has a good time helping them campaign. It's a nice distraction from everything else going on in his life, and the two of them seem to appreciate it.

Fumiko especially. Kiyoshi finds himself downright taken aback by the passion she shows for the position. And when she gives her speech, declaring proudly that she's going to become a teacher again, he's weirdly happy for her. She's always been a pretty introverted, uninterested person, and so it makes him happy to see her finally find something she feels so strongly about.

He feels a little weird when she asks to talk with Makoto alone, but he gets it... mostly. He's sure it's another Korosensei or Aguri or whatever thing. AKA none of his business. And although he feels a little lonely beginning the trek down the mountain on his own, when he glances over his shoulder and catches sight of the two of them smiling and laughing on the roof, he's just happy to see them happy.

Sure, he doesn't know what they're talking about. But… maybe he doesn't always have to.

Besides, they don't keep him waiting long. As promised, they regroup with him at the base of the mountain. And Fumiko takes him by the shoulder, bouncing from foot to foot, and telling him just what they've decided on.

"Teachers. The two of you, huh?" He can… almost see it. Maybe a bit of an outlandish duo, but he thinks they could do a pretty good job! After all: They're both smart… empathetic, and they work best as a pair.

"I say go for it!" he responds. "That's awesome, you two!"

And he's happy for them. Like… really happy. Not the jealous sort of happy or the halfhearted sort. He doesn't want part in that. Again: he is way too bad with people. So it's not like he's being excluded. They are not excluding him. They're just trusting him enough to let him know their hopes for the future. And there is no higher honor.

...It's starting to feel like they're part of something so important. Something so cosmic and beyond them. But the more Kiyoshi watches them chat about it: Talking in low whispers and speaking each other's 'old names,' the more he thinks he's fine with not being a direct part of that. He'll never be like them. But… that's okay. He's himself. And he's starting to finally accept that.

Who cares if he doesn't have some heroic secret identity? Makoto ruffles his hair, and Fumiko shares a snide remark. And Kiyoshi knows he's loved all the same.

...He's really lucky to have them. He never thought he'd be able to feel this way about people. That they could have things he didn't, and that he could look at them without envy. Without self-loathing or anger. But less and less he feels bad about himself in comparison to his friends. Because they do everything in their power to make him feel like a hero in his own right.

Home is still weird, but that's okay. He arrives, greets his dad, and pretends things aren't awkward between them. He crouches down to scratch Taro behind the ears and lets the dog trot after him into his room. They lay back on the bed, and he spends the afternoon screwing around on his Nintendo Verse and practicing deep breathing.

He and Dad make small talk over dinner. It's awkward… stilted... like two old friends who haven't talked in years. Except they're not friends. He's his son. And he still doesn't know what to say. But Dad slides Taro a bit of his plate, hoping Kiyoshi won't call him out. And when he recites a small, funny story about Mom, Kiyoshi almost swears he catches a smile on his face. Perhaps one he's hoping his son just won't notice, either.

Kiyoshi actually goes to bed with a pretty good feeling. Not perfect, but… good. Fumiko texts him goodnight, and Makoto sends him a selfie with the cat. His mind drifts back to mom, but… at least he knows he's loved. And as he stares up at the ceiling, trying his best to drift off into sleep, he decides maybe… just maybe… things will be okay.

...

...

...

...

...

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?"

CRASH!

"Wrong with me!? You think there's something wrong with ME!?"

Bang. Snap. A scream.

"You need SERIOUS help!"

...

...

...

...

…

No. Nonononononononononononono.

Collapse. Complete and utter collapse. As far as the eye can see. Ringing in his ears and resounding from his throat and shredding his chest. Screaming - in triumph - in terror - in anger until his throat burns raw. At the top of his lungs and with all of his heart and all of his demons manifested for the world to see.

Collapse. Of the world around him, and of the pristine white building. Debris clouding the air and filling his lungs. The sickening crack of a support beam as the roof falls in and the walls crumble and the monster laughs. It laughs and laughs and laughs because it's it's turn to laugh and everything is over. Another scream, and this time it's not sewn by the seeds of his own rage, but rather his adversary's unending fury. Gunshots and screaming and blood and so much blood. And it's not his. Not yet. But it locks eyes with him and it doesn't need to speak to say "You're next."

"KILL IT! JUST KILL IT ALREADY!"

Collapse. Of his mind and his thoughts and everything he'd thought he could grasp. He paces in circles and growls under his breath and puts another hole in the wall. The doctors shriek and reprimand him and tell him he can't - He can't do that. But no-one tells him what to do and so he grabs them the collar and pulls them in close and lets them know that they will never understand what he's lost.

Revenge-minded. No - obsessed. It's the only face he can make out in his mind. And it fills him with hate. The creature laughs and the building and his mind collapse, and all he has left is vengeance. He paces in circles. And when he punches a hole in his own wall, none of the scientists reprimand him.

"At least…" he hears one of the survivors whisper in a low, raspy tone. "...He isn't touching us anymore…"

Of course not. Never. The sheer narcissism - The audacity of assuming they'd ever be worth enough to earn his fury. No-one - no-one except that beast in misery could ever sate his rage.

It hadn't always been that way. Once, any target had worked to satisfy the flame inside his chest. One out of line comment or ignorant idea or wrong look. Simply being there. The wrong place. The wrong time. Collarbones wrapped in palm and sputtering for breath and kicking desperately in some attempt to fight back. Claws raked across shoulders and feet brought down - stomping and kicking upon the back of necks.

Euphoria. Catharsis and recognition. Because they know just what he's capable of. And they fear him.

...Collapse. Of a ribcage beneath his fist, and watery eyes, staring up at his own, as if asking "How could you do this to me?"

The answer is no more satisfying than an empty "Just because I could."

That night, Kiyoshi dreams of collapse. And when he awakes, breathing raggedly… afraid of the things he's seen and the things he's said and the things he knows… petrified, unable to move, and caught up in the clutches of sleep paralysis… wanting to reach up and cover his eyes and scream at the top of his lungs and claw at his skin and hurt someone and hurt himself and cry, he swears he feels one last thing collapse.

...The heart inside his chest.