Chapter 33.
Dean could hardly miss Jack casually strolling into the library behind him. "Let me guess, Sam sent you to babysit me and make sure I didn't do anything stupid."
"Yes. Please don't do something stupid and make me look incompetent."
Dean smiled. "Kid, your honesty is weird, but refreshing. You and Sam have nothing to worry about here. Cas is the one acting weird."
"I feel responsible. Sam and I found those talismans and they seem to be causing trouble." said Jack.
"No. No, Jack, you finding the Keys of Rhydian has only been good and Castiel and I are very grateful to you. Please don't ever think we're not. It's not the talismans. It's not even the mind curse. We always had a weird, turbulent, difficult relationship and once in a while, one of us overreacts or says something dumb and everything gets messed up for a while. It's part of being human ... and angel, apparently. Friendship can be complicated. Friendships with me, especially."
"If I'd known he'd go, I would have stopped him." said Jack.
"It's not your job to herd Cas back home." said Dean, "Really, it was my job to stop him from wanting to leave and I screwed that up. As usual, I was too wrapped up in my own stuff."
"So what caused the problem?" said Jack.
"Talking. Never a good idea, Jack. Never talk. Just bury anything that bothers you where nobody else can trip over it."
"That's the opposite of the advice you, Castiel and Sam have given me in the past." said Jack.
"Yeah, I know." said Dean, "I got his birthday present organised, anyway. I'll be picking it up tomorrow."
"What did you get him?"
"Nothing big, nothing amazing, just something a hunter should have." said Dean. He didn't mention the inscription, either.
Sam appeared in the doorway. "Cas is heading home."
"That's quick." said Dean.
"Maybe he really did just go out for food." said Jack.
"For food he doesn't need?" said Dean, "He's more likely to have been hitting on a waitress and I don't consider that a serious possibility either."
"Are you okay?" said Sam.
"I'm not the one who disappeared at high speed." said Dean.
"Noted. Are you okay?"
Dean nodded.
"Sarah wants to come over tomorrow morning to set up for the party. I told her one of us would pick her up."
"I'll do it. I have to pick something up for Cas in the same direction."
"Thanks. I didn't want her driving herself that distance."
"No, neither do I." said Dean.
"Do you think she'll need help setting up?" said Jack, "I'd like to help."
"I'm sure she will." said Sam, "And she'll love having you there to help her. She likes you." He turned to Dean. "Dean, do you want me to talk to Cas?"
"No, I don't want anyone to talk to Cas. I can handle Cas."
"Okay. Fine. Whatever."
"What does that mean?" said Dean.
"It means stop being so defensive. Nobody is saying this is your fault."
"I'll wait for him in the garage." said Dean, "I'll make sure he's okay."
"We can all be there if that's easier." said Sam.
"You think I'll screw up again."
"No, I think maybe this is getting to you and you might need some support."
"Well, I don't. Amazingly, I can talk to my best friend without having back-up." said Dean. He knew he wasn't sounding as stable as he was pretending to be. "I'll fix it, Sam. I think he's just anxious. We all are, until we know whether this thing can stop him suffering my dreams. Tomorrow morning, all our problems could be over. We just have to navigate some choppy waters until then."
"What do you want me to do?" said Jack.
"You and Sam, work on making some kind of permanent solution to the mind curse." said Dean, "Whatever it takes, I want it gone."
He went back to the garage alone. It seemed a long wait, but probably wasn't. He waited for Cas to park his car and then went over just as he was getting out.
"What was that all about?" he said.
Cas reached into the car and brought out some bags of fast food. "Shut up." he said. He put the bags into Dean's arms and then said, "Let's go to your room."
"What's the food for?" said Dean.
"Eating." said Cas.
"Okay. Ask a stupid question, I guess." He followed Cas to his own room. "What is this?" he said, as they went into the room.
"Sit down, shut up and eat." said Cas.
Dean sat on the bed. "So this is for me?"
"I don't eat." said Cas.
"I know, but ... "
"Were my instructions unclear?" said Cas, "We tried talking. Talking turns out to be a bad idea. You haven't eaten all day. I don't need to hear whatever you were about to tell me when Bobby gave you an excuse not to. I don't need to hear anything. I just need to see you eat."
"You have the weirdest hobbies." said Dean.
"Shut up." said Cas.
"Okay. Shutting up."
Cas looked at him with a strange sorrow. Then he said quietly, "I know it feels bad right now. I know you think our friendship is in freefall. That's not the case. It just can't work today, with words. We're hearing wrong, we're saying all the worst things and I know shut up is not a great choice of words, but everything we ever felt or believed is still there. It's just getting tangled up in all the mind curse mess. Let's not try to find a way out through words. Let's just look after the basics, food, shelter and companionship and hit the reset button tomorrow, when we know if these things work."
Dean looked at the burgers and fries. Whatever wounds his thoughtless words had inflicted, the food was a message of unconditional love and concern.
"Dean, just eat." said Cas.
"When I heard you'd gone ... "
"You need to be less clingy." said Cas, "It doesn't look good, for either of us. You don't want people to think of you as Castiel's pet human."
"Touché." said Dean, "Okay, no more talk. Just sit here. You're right. Words don't matter right now." He took a bite of a burger.
Cas sat on the end of the bed.
"I love you, Cas and I'm sorry." said Dean.
"Which part of 'shut up' was too complicated for you?" said Cas, but he was smiling.