Chapter Thirty-Two

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS.

With true friends . . . even water drunk together is sweet enough.

~ Chinese Proverb

Time passed with a stubborn slowness that early morning. The moon and the glittering stars were still visible in the dark, hazy sky and the birds were still asleep in their warm nests. Touya was sitting on a stone staircase in one of the courtyards. His katana was resting on the step below him. Yukito stood against a red pillar and watched his unmoving form from afar. He was reluctant to speak to or even approach the Japanese man but it had more to do with cowardice than actually not wanting to.

Eventually, Yukito made up his mind. He would start his duties for the day. He was not a coward at heart but Kinomoto Touya looked very intimidating right then with his brown eyes staring off into the distance and his hand propped up against his knee. As he turned to leave, Touya caught the movement and trapped him in a piercing stare.

He picked up his katana and made his way over to Yukito.

"Are you stalking me Chief Overseer Tsukishiro?"

"No!" said Yukito, smiling like a man who was found with stolen jewels in his pockets.

Where was that woman? Akizuki Nakuru. Yukito thought that this was the ideal time for her to jump on Touya's back and distract him. Then he could slink away and avoid this embarrassment.

"Everywhere I go, you seem to be there," said Touya, his eyes narrowing. "It's not like the Forbidden City is a small place."

Yukito did not realize that Touya had noticed he had been watching him. He took a step back, ready to turn on his heels and make a run for it.

"What do you want?" asked Touya, advancing on him.

A curious look came over the man's face. He was not upset. Disturbed by Yukito's actions perhaps, but definitely not upset.

"I wanted to talk about my brother," said Yukito.

"You know more about him than I do."

"But you spent his last moments with him." Then Yukito's voice changed. "I didn't get there in time to save him. It was the one time he needed me and I wasn't there."

"And you think hearing about his death would make you feel better?"

Touya turned his gaze skyward.

"The last thing he said was your name. That's all that should matter."

"He called out for me?" asked Yukito, self-hatred consuming him. "But I was too late..."

"No," said Touya, looking him in the eyes. "He wanted you to be safe. And he died knowing that you would be."

Yukito glanced at the katana clutched in Touya's hand.

"How would he know that?"

"I promised him that I would protect you."

"I don't need protection."

"It doesn't matter," said Touya. "I made a promise to a dying man. It was impulsive, I admit. But I have to keep it."

He yawned tiredly.

"It's not like I'm going anywhere."

"Because the Honourable Lady Sakura is here? You're just like Yue, you know. Always worrying," said Yukito, slapping him on the arm.

Touya cast a look at it and Yukito quickly pulled the wayward hand away. Then giving a deep bow to the taller man he murmured, "I'm sorry for bothering you Kinomoto-san," and he sped away from the courtyard feeling lonelier than when he had arrived there.

"Tsukishiro!"

Touya was walking towards him, a hand up, signalling Yukito to stop.

"To be honest, I'm lost," he said. "And I'd like to get back to my room."

Yukito smiled.

"I can take you."

Touya nodded in thanks and Yukito expertly guided him through the palace. He did not feel as bad as he thought he would when he determinedly avoided every short-cut and instead opted for the scenic route. There was not much to see in this area of the palace though. Just walls upon walls upon walls. In the meantime, he entertained Touya with stories of his life. Inevitably, the topic of Yue came up again.

"I don't remember my parents," he told the silent man. "They died when I was quite young. Yue was all I ever knew. And I lost him. My chest hurts all the time. I wonder if that's normal. Sometimes, I can't catch my breath. But when I look at the Moon, it feels like he's here."

And Yukito put a hand over his heart.

"Then it doesn't hurt so much anymore.

"Sakura can't remember our mother," said Touya, finally saying something personal. "She can't remember how much she cried after the burial. When children cry it's... it would be less painful to cut off your hand with a blunt knife. That's how I felt. And she cried all the time."

"When did she stop?" asked Yukito.

"I told her that I could see the dead. I really do have the sixth sense. I said, mother's heart breaks more and more with every tear you shed. But when you smile, she is infinitely happy. You know what the little kaiju said?"

"What?"

Touya put on a high-pitched tone.

"Onii-chan, what is infinimity?"

Yukito's eyebrows flew into his bangs and he laughed. Touya smirked.

"In the end, our father had to draw pictures for her. Of Okaa-san. Every few days he would draw a new one. He placed it in her room at night so she could see her mother when she woke up."

"That's a beautiful story."

Touya clamped a hand down on Yukito's shoulder.

"I'm trying to tell you that it's going to hurt for a long time. I'm not sure if it gets better or we just get used to living with the pain. But after a while, you stop thinking about it everyday and wondering what if."

"Arigatou, To-ya."

"Are we friends?" asked Touya, when he heard the nickname.

"I apologize..." said Yukito, taking a step back.

Touya shook his head.

"I don't mind so much."

Yukito smiled and the next thing he knew, Touya's face was inches from his own. He stumbled back in surprise, his back hitting the wall behind him. Touya's hand came to rest beside his head. He laid the katana next to Yukito's leg and clutched his chin. Yukito was frozen as brown eyes stared into his own, the man's body restricting him from moving.

"You know how I said I can see the dead," said Touya, his voice hushed. "For a moment there, I thought I saw Yue. In you. Behind your eyes."

Yukito swallowed a lump in his throat.

"We look almost identical."

Touya tilted his head, still gazing intently into Yukito's face.

"That you do."

His hand slid from Yukito's chin to rest against his chest. Touya's eyes closed and the side of his head touched the side of Yukito's softly.

"You feel like him too," said Touya, opening his eyes. "But I don't think you're ready to know."

"Know what?" whispered Yukito breathlessly.

"How he lives on inside you."

"What do you mean?"

Something caught Touya's attention and he stepped back, putting a good two feet between them.

"I know this hallway," he said, his head turning from side to side. "I turn left at the end and my room is the second door on the right."

He grabbed his katana.

"Thank you Tsukishiro. I'll be fine from here."

"Yukito."

"What?" asked Touya, already near the end of the hallway.

"You can call me Yukito."

Touya gave a wave and disappeared as he rounded the corner. Yukito remained in the hallway as he tried to catch his breath. What was this fascination of his with people whose family name was Kinomoto? Once, Syaoran had been willing to kill him because of his affectionate feelings for Sakura and now, he was becoming obsessed with her brother? What was it about these siblings that was so enticing it produced all sorts of feelings within him? This time around, Yue was not there to tell him when to back off.

Yukito smacked himself hard on the forehead as he slid down the wall.

This is how it all ends, he thought.

Yet he could not help the smile playing on his lips. Yue was gone, but Touya was as close as he was going to get to that overly serious, hard-headed brother of his. And he was grateful for the man's presence.

The coronation was too grand, too colourful, too long and too loud. At least that was Syaoran's opinion. The drums drowned out the cries of Xiao Dan who was cradled in Sakura's arms on the right side of the great hall. That entire morning they had all been walking in a large procession with the priests and officials, driveling their well-rehearsed words. An impressive crowd of citizens stood outside the Forbidden City in celebration of a man whose face they would never see.

All corpses had been disposed of and the palace had been washed and blessed. Yelan was there and walking beside her was Meilin. Syaoran could make out Yukito's fair hair bobbing about in the crowd. Even Touya and Nakuru were present to Syaoran's surprise.

He sat on the throne as the great proclamation came to an end. Finally. When he was announced as the emperor, Son of Heaven, The Dragon, Lord of Ten Thousand Years and whatever other titles the officials could think up, the drums and the music roared like a tsunami in a deafening culmination of sounds.

The guests ate and drank, and made themselves merry. Syaoran was presented with an array of gifts and to his annoyance, women. Did the noblemen not do their research? Or did they simply choose to ignore the fact that he did not want their daughters? He concluded it was the latter. There was nothing like having the favour of the emperor, and giving him a nice bed toy usually did the trick.

"I wish Wei was alive to see this day," said Yelan as she came to Syaoran to pay her respects. "He cared for you like you were his own son. He never said so because he did not want to offend you."

"He would not have offended me," said Syaoran.

He had been back in the City for over a month and no one had mentioned Wei to him until that moment. He knew they were all too afraid to tell him Wang Wei had passed but no one had to. He had figured it out soon enough.

But how could Wei have ever thought that Syaoran would be offended that he thought of him as a son? He told Wei things he had never told anyone else. Wei understood him. He brought him Sakura. And Syaoran could not have acted more ungrateful at the time... a regret of his.

The bright midday sun had retired behind the clouds but the festivities were still picking up momentum. It all reminded him of his surprise birthday party Eriol had organized much to his chagrin. Now here he was, presiding over them, ever his father's little perfectly-constructed ruler.

Syaoran sighed, a weariness settling into his limbs. Unable to endure any more of the celebrations he stood and a hush fell over the hall. He passed meaningful looks to Sakura and Meilin and they followed him from the hall. Together they walked to the Imperial Garden along the colourful stone path. On the way there, he had Hua-Ling sent for and she joined them beneath one of the large pavilions.

The servants placed a few games next to the low table and one of the women sat at the bottom of the staircase that led to the pavilion. She blew into an elegantly carved, wooden flute, unleashing a slow, sweet and slightly nostalgic melody.

"It's warm today," said Syaoran, gazing up at the clear skies.

"Yes," said Sakura, as Meilin took the mahjong tiles out of their case. "Isn't it lovely? The weather is perfect for a day like this one."

Syaoran held out his arms and Sakura placed Xiao Dan carefully in them. He was a lot better at holding the boy now and was practicing as often as he could. Of course, he lied and told anyone before they asked, that he only did this to make sure the boy was being fed properly by checking his weight. The baby was awake but very quiet as though wanting to hear all the sounds of nature, no matter how far away they were.

Sakura and Meilin began shuffling their tiles but Hua-Ling had not touched the ones Meilin had dealt her. She had the appearance of a pretty corpse. He had seen the same look in the women of enemies he had conquered but he had never thought he would see it in any woman he knew.

He extended his hand slowly and rest it lightly on top Hua-Ling's, not wanting to get an extreme reaction. She drew a deep breath and held it, her entire body wooden. Syaoran would have liked the opportunity to go back in time and really enjoy killing Enlai. As soon as Eriol figured out how to control time he would do just that, Syaoran promised himself.

"Forgot how to play?" he asked Hua-Ling.

"I'm not worthy to be in Huangdi's presence," she said, her voice hoarse and hollow. "I shouldn't be here. I do not wish to bring Huangdi more shame than I already have."

"Shame." Syaoran tipped her chin up, gazing into her brown eyes. "When a man robs another man who is blind, should the blind man feel ashamed or should the thief? Taking advantage of others who are weaker than you is the real shame."

Tears welled up in her eyes.

"Shuffle your tiles," he told her. "Sakura and Meilin are ready to play."

He gave an encouraging nod and even managed a smile. Hua-Ling held his hand and kissed it. Then she placed her hands over the tiles, shuffling them noisily along with everyone else. Across the table from Syaoran, Sakura was smiling to herself. The little witch had gotten what she wanted. But she could not see that Hua-Ling had little fight in her and it was only a matter of time before what will she had gave out.

As they played Syaoran's eyes roamed the garden, memories of his youth there coming to life in his mind. Outside in gardens he could always make believe he was on some grand adventure and that the garden was an endless forest; not simply a speck of beauty surrounded on all sides by buildings which in turn were surrounded by towering and inescapable walls.

His chest grew tight. Yelan was partly right when she told him some laws could not be changed. But Syaoran did not care. He would break any one he pleased. What Syaoran did not want was to deal with the system of endless politics, warring, gossip and ceremonies, all of which at some point will cause blood to be drawn. Everyone he cared about would be caught in the middle of it.

"Tomoyo-chan!"

A tile slipped from Sakura's hand and clattered onto the stone floor. Eriol, Tomoyo and Eriol's eldest son Han were approaching. Sakura had not spoken with her best friend as yet so when she looked at Syaoran and he nodded, she ran down the pavilion's steps and into the woman's arms.

Syaoran handed Xiao Dan to Meilin and wordlessly, he and Eriol went off on their own. Eriol's steps were heavy because of his still aching body and his obvious refusal to use a crutch. Syaoran gave a mental smirk. He knew Eriol was a vain bastard. Now he had proof.

"You're Huangdi now," said the magician.

"It seems so."

"You seldom care for my opinions," said Eriol. "But for what it's worth, I think you would make an excellent emperor. I always have."

"Is that your way of saying you were wrong about me destroying the works of many generations? Because as you can see, the City is still standing."

"Your wife told you of her prophetic dreams?"

"She told me everything, yes. And your thoughts on them. Have no fear, I hold no grudge for your lack of trust in me."

Eriol smirked.

"The only thing left for us to discuss is Li Sheng - "

"Li?"

"Yes. Li."

It was a rare moment to see Eriol's feelings blatantly displayed on his face. He was fuming.

"When Tomoyo told me there had been no execution, I thought you had killed him yourself. But you didn't. You let him get away with his crimes. He killed your father. His actions led to Kaho's death."

"I said he's dead. I do not call that getting away with crimes."

"You know what I mean. He should have suffered. He should have suffered."

It was even rarer for Eriol to lose control of his emotions like this. Syaoran knew this was because of his despair over his beloved wife's death so he said nothing of Eriol's disrespectful tone. Instead, Syaoran picked up a small pebble and threw it as far as he could, unleashing his temper that way. He raised a hand over his eyes, squinting to see where it landed. Disappointed, he picked up another.

"Sheng suffered. I'm sure of that Eriol," he said. "But what's done is done."

And Syaoran tossed the second pebble. It travelled farther than the first. After a lengthy and unpleasant silence, Eriol spoke.

"I wasn't wrong about your role in China's downfall," he said. "Seeing the future is one thing. It's not always linear or clear. Interpreting what I see can be complicated."

Syaoran's clenched his jaw.

"You really think I will be the one to ruin generations of imperial rule?"

"Yes. Because even though you could rule well, you never had any desire to hold the position."

Syaoran looked at Eriol, his heart thumping against his ribcage because Eriol had a knowing expression on his face.

"You're still in a state of recovery and yet you find time to spy on me."

"Not you," said Eriol. "Kinomoto Touya has that covered I'm afraid. I was observing your advisors. For your own safety of course."

"And what did you find?"

Eriol adjusted his glasses and it glinted in the sunlight.

"I discovered that the emperor has an interest in Hong Kong. A specific place in Hong Kong."

"I haven't decided anything yet," said Syaoran. "I'm not sure what I'm going to do."

"Then let me help you decide," said Eriol, propping himself against a tree trunk. "With you as emperor, China would flourish but you will be miserable. Your sons will suffer. A weak grandchild will be overthrown. Your legacy will end. Such is what has always been and will be."

Syaoran's heart beat faster.

"And if I leave?"

"If you leave, China will flourish for a time. But the blood in the emperors' veins won't be as strong as yours. No more will the imperial line wield powerful magic. In the end, outsiders will not only conquer us, they will crush us. However, your bloodline, the Li Clan, will survive it all. That much I am sure of."

Syaoran studied Eriol's face.

"You want out of the City too, don't you?" he asked.

Eriol smiled.

"You've lived a sheltered life Huangdi. You'll need me to do your taxes."

Syaoran gave Eriol a withering look. It was so like the man to pretend he did not have his own set of issues. But he was right. Syaoran could use his help in some areas and he was sure Sakura would be happy to have Eriol's wife with them. It seemed he had made his decision after all.

Sakura and Tomoyo sat together on a stone bench near a small pond. The consort was leaning against her arm as Sakura stroked her long locks. She had told Sakura about what had happened in the palace and though she did not go into details, Sakura's imagination was mercilessly filling in all the gaps.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here with you Tomoyo-chan," she kept on murmuring.

"I'm happy you weren't here," said Tomoyo. "You don't have to feel guilty for being safe Sakura-chan."

"I thought about you everyday."

Tomoyo wrapped her hands around Sakura's waist.

"I know you're sad because of what happened to me, to Kaho, to Miko, to everyone. But I'm alive. So many died. Even Chiharu. Did you know her lover Yamazaki, killed himself when he found her body?"

Sakura buried her face in Tomoyo's hair.

"We'll burn incense for all them. Every year."

The woman said nothing.

"Tomoyo-chan?"

"Sometimes Eriol-san looks at me and I think he wishes that I had died. And Kaho had lived."

"I'm sure he doesn't think that."

"He loved her so much," said Tomoyo. "I wish I could bring her back. And the children."

"He loves you too," said Sakura. "You will give him more children."

"They could never replace the ones he had."

Sakura kissed Tomoyo on the head.

"They won't be meant to. If he gives you any grief, let me know. I will tell Huangdi to make him change his attitude."

Tomoyo laughed.

"Can you do that?"

"Yes," said Sakura, laughing as well. "Everything will be all right Tomoyo-chan. I promise."

The woman pulled away from Sakura and touched her cheek tenderly.

"I will have to get some new paintbrushes," she said. "It has been too long since I have attempted to capture how kawaii you are."

Sakura pulled a face.

"Tomoyo..."

Two long months had passed since the coronation ceremony and life in the palace had returned to one of monotony. No one could complain because the excitement of the past year was enough to last most a lifetime. Everyone had acquired a set of wounds that needed healing. Monotony meant stability. Stability meant safety. Safety meant being able to sleep with both eyes closed at night, and that made a good morning.

The inhabitants of the Forbidden City had taken it upon themselves do everything possible to forget their woes. The atmosphere had become lighter, with many games, parties and in general, lounging, taking place. It would not last forever but while it did everyone made the most of it.

Even Syaoran was a bit more indulgent. His and Sakura's new favourite past-time when he was free was to go to the bath house together.

"Huangdi-"

"Sakura. What has gotten into you? You know when we're alone you can call me Xiao Lang."

Sakura passed a washcloth over Syaoran's upper back and up the curve of his neck.

"I know. I only want to do the right thing and call you by your proper title."

"The right thing is what I say it is," said Syaoran, taking the cloth from her hands. He pulled her in front of him and draped her long hair over her shoulder. Pressing a kiss to her back he asked, "What were you going to say?"

"Oh. It's just, have you noticed anything strange going on? With everyone?"

"Like what?" asked Syaoran, planting a kiss on the tip of her shoulder.

"I'm not sure..." And she tilted her head so Syaoran could gain access to her neck. "I feel like everyone is in on some private joke and I'm clueless."

Syaoran's hands slid down to Sakura's hips, and he worked his thumbs into the muscles on her lower back. She sighed softly and wished she was lying down. He was able to massage her better when she was in bed.

"Well that's not nice," said Syaoran. "I'll speak with them later. Let every man, woman and child know they're fasting until the end of the week."

Sakura looked back at him and he laughed quietly.

"I'm not serious. Relax."

"Maybe I'm getting a little paranoid."

"Maybe," said Syaoran and he kissed her on the cheek before standing up in the water and walking over to his towel.

"Where are you going?" asked Sakura in disappointment.

"Meetings," said Syaoran. "But they won't be long. Ping told me Eriol's wife wanted to see you. I think she's finished with that hanfu you were telling me about. Why don't you wear it for me later tonight?"

Sakura blushed and nodded. Tomoyo's style of showing a bit of cleavage which she had Sakura pioneer was really catching on now. Syaoran had become quite an admirer of it and had taken to having Sakura do suggestive poses in the outfits when they were together at night. Who knew he was so depraved?

Needless to say it was a pleasant surprise when Sakura found herself standing in a red and gold hanfu that hid her entire body three times over. There was even an elaborate headpiece to go with it. It was all overwhelming.

"You look amazing Sakura-chan," said Tomoyo as she and the other seamstresses circled her.

There were shadows under her eyes and Sakura wondered if perhaps she was overdoing it. But Tomoyo insisted that sewing gave her something to focus on and helped soothe her nerves after the siege ordeal.

"You should show Huangdi!" said Nakuru, who was present as well.

Before Sakura had a chance to protest, she was out of the room, down the hallways, and walking through a garden she had never seen before.

"Tomoyo-chan, Nakuru-chan, Huangdi's in a meeting," she said for the tenth time. "He-"

Sakura was rendered speechless. There was Syaoran, dressed in a red and black hanfu standing in front of a temple. The servants started giggling throwing blossoms on the ground. Touya was there with Xiao Dan in his arms. There were also Eriol and his household, Yukito, Cerberus, Meilin and Hua-Ling.

Syaoran held his hand out to her.

"What's happening?" asked Sakura as she took it.

"Well that depends on you," he said. "Will you marry me?"

Sakura's hands flew to her face and the maidservants started clapping. Her gaze shifted to Meilin but Syaoran turned her face back towards him.

"Will you?"

She glanced at Meilin again and the woman gave a brief nod and looked away. This is what Syaoran wanted. And Meilin would do what he wanted. Sakura dropped her hands so he could hear her answer.

"Yes!"

The maidservants cheered.

The biggest grin Sakura had ever seen on Syaoran's face lasted throughout the short and simple ceremony. Later he would tell her that their wedding meant too much to him to be shared with the entire empire. Only those who mattered were there.

The final act of the ceremony came when they had to bow to each other and Sakura burst into tears. Syaoran pulled her into a hug and whispered the sweetest things into her ear. Things she wished she had been more clear-headed to remember. Then, instead of taking her to bed, they decided on a walk through the garden where they took every opportunity to call each other husband and wife.

Syaoran cupped her cheeks, resting his forehead against hers.

"I'm not sure you'll ever understand how much you mean to me," said Syaoran. "Or if I would ever be able to fully show you. All I can is, I'm happy you said yes."

"You could have made me say yes if I didn't."

"But it wouldn't have been real. I was worried when you didn't answer right away but your brother looked hopeful."

Sakura laughed.

"I love you, Xiao Lang."

And she kissed his lips, making him smile.

"I love you too, Sakura."

Hey Tomodachi! I hope you all enjoyed it. Epilogue will be up soon. Then I will finish FFY. I'm not writing as fast as I want to but I'm almost done with the latest chapter. Read and Review. Until next time, Ja ne! ^_^