Ambivalence
Chapter 27: Blackmail
By: Knowledge Eater
Disclaimer: Ubisoft owns Far Cry 5, I just like to play with their world and characters.
The moment Aiden stepped out of the room Faith did her best to relax. She was tired, but sleep would not claim her no matter how long she kept her eyes shut. Between the tremors and body aches she couldn't shake off the anxiety she felt about her research. Especially now with how Aiden seemed to be harboring second thoughts about Jess being an Angel.
The conversation with the junior deputy left Faith feeling even more worried about finding the Angel reversal. What if she couldn't figure it out by the time the Father was arrested? Would she be allowed to continue her research in jail? What if she couldn't figure out a reversal at all? The thought of failure had her heart racing and dread churning in her stomach.
She didn't want to fail her promise to Aiden.
Sleeping was fruitless. If she was to remain awake, she wasted time she could be using to continue her research. Her body protested the movement as she climbed out of the warm sleeping bag. It felt like each hour her body aches increased.
The body aches, tremors, and sweating were all because she's been without a dose for so long. It worried her that she had no means of getting another one before things got a lot worse. Aiden already saw the marks on her arm and it left her feeling mortified and embarrassed. She didn't want to imagine the shame of him seeing her go through the withdrawals.
With renewed determination, Faith turned the lights back on and started organizing her notes. The books helped refresh her memories and she was close to getting back to her original progress before she lost everything at her Gate.
Try as she might, everything she read wasn't sticking. An ache developed right between her brows and steadily grew in intensity the more she read. Frustration brewed in her chest. The pain in her muscles and her leg flared to the point where it became a distraction. She shoved her papers and books away and slumped over the desk, she wrapped her arms around her head and tried to calm her breathing.
It wasn't just her research that she was stressing over. Her thoughts kept going back to what she learned from Aiden and the man that threatened to shoot her. She had no idea that the woman that complained about the construction of the Father's statue had been killed.
She had hoped to meet the woman personally, and she sent people to offer her compensation to warm her up. Faith was confident that with compensation and meeting with her she could convert her to join the Project. She could have been saved like Faith had by joining a community so willing to accept her despite her flaws. But she had been so busy overseeing the statue and making sure that enough Bliss was distributed to her brothers she completely forgot about checking in with the woman. When she failed to hear from her again, she assumed she was satisfied with her offering. But to learn that the woman had been killed? It infuriated her that the people she sent took matters into their own hands. Violence was always her very last resort. And honestly Aiden was the only one to push her to resort to violence.
Furthermore, to learn from Aiden himself that some Angels had been mutilated? Both anger and disappointment filled her. Yes she couldn't be present for every Angel conversion, most of the conversions didn't even need her approval. Countless names were given to her for "re-education" whether it was straying brothers and sisters or the resistance. Faith did her best to meet with them, but she was one person! She was in charge of overseeing the proper creation and distribution of the Bliss on top of looking into improvements of the Bliss itself. There were even cases where some people tried to smuggle more Bliss than what they needed. Then there were her smaller duties such as buying local businesses and properties. She also frequently met with the newest people that sought to join the Project.
Faith accepted the necessity of the Father's cruelty; she knew better than to voice her concern or disagreement with it. The ever-lingering threat of being replaced was like a shadow for her, even after she was officially adopted by the Father, and her image was immortalized in the very image of the family. So instead, she tried to find an alternative to the violence and the very first Angel was created. She still firmly believed it to be a better fate to be at peace in the Bliss over being subjugated to whatever Jacob and John did for their "re-education."
Ignorance is bliss.
It was better to turn a blind eye to whatever her brothers and sisters did. She hoped her different approach to dealing with people would be an example to those that served her and they too would avoid violence. The frustration in her reached a boiling point. Her mother would tell her time and time again that she was so unbelievably naive. Tracey told her she was too nice and trusting in others that didn't deserve it.
Frustration in her stupidity, annoyance and disappointment in her own people, all of the emotions bubbled inside Faith that she felt like she would explode.
As hard as she tried, Faith couldn't stop the tears that swelled in her eyes and eventually slid down her cheeks. The moment she sniffled the dam burst and she was powerless to stop the sobs that clawed out of her throat. They poured out of her so forcefully she struggled to suck in air.
"Hey."
Faith jumped and curled into herself. Tears blurred her vision, but she easily recognized the soothing deep voice that was Aiden. She hadn't heard him enter. The embarrassment of being caught crying like a child overpowered the other emotions that rolled through her body, but she couldn't make herself stop.
Aiden didn't say anything. He didn't scold her for being a cry baby and hungry for attention like her mother would have said. He didn't accuse her of trying to gain pity like her father was fond of telling her. He didn't complain about the uselessness of her tears like Tracey would say. Instead, she felt his warm arms wrap around her and gently pulled her towards his chest.
Faith felt herself crying harder as she melted into his embrace. She had only been hugged twice while she had been crying, both were from the Father. The first time was when she stepped into the Father's church for the first time and everyone took turns talking about themselves. When she fell into tears when she confessed the reasons for her drug abuse the Father embraced her. The second time he embraced her was when she recovered from her drug withdrawals and he had given her her new name, she had cried because she was finally accepted into a family.
Aiden remained silent. He never urged her to stop. The warmth of the embrace was calming. An unknown time later Faith felt utterly drained emotionally, mentally and physically. She didn't want to stray from the physical contact, but she couldn't keep crying on him forever. She immediately felt so much colder when she pulled away from him. Heat warmed her cheeks when she saw the massive damp spot on his shirt that was caused by her tears and running nose.
It was too late to try to maintain any dignity, but with no tissues nearby Faith resorted to using her shirt to wipe her face and nose. She had cried so hard and for so long her breaths came out stuttering and the occasional hiccup escaped.
"What's wrong?" Aiden asked. He didn't look at her with contempt, there was no sarcasm or impatience in his voice. Faith was so used to people's indifference to her, even after seven years with the Project, she almost didn't know how to respond.
"She was right," Faith whispered.
"Who's right? About what?"
"My mother," Faith rubbed her eyes and sniffled, "I'm too naive and stupid. Everything I do is wrong."
A small wrinkle formed between the male's eyebrows. "Why do you feel she's right?"
Faith's inhale stuttered. "I tried to lead by example, like the Father. With the Bliss, I had hoped to avoid violence. But it seems people still resorted to violence even among those that served me."
Aiden was silent for a moment, the wrinkle between his brows creased deeper in his skin. "Even if you were against violence, the rest of the cult accepted it because of the Father. The reason why I'm even here is because of a video that leaked out of the county. The Father killed someone by digging his thumbs into the camera man's eyeballs. Everyone in that church didn't even blink."
Faith looked at him with wide eyes. She had heard the rumors about that incident, but again it was so much easier to remain ignorant and stay focused on her purpose.
The junior deputy exhaled deeply and rubbed a hand on her shoulder ever so gently. His warm hand seemed to carry an electric current, a shiver ran down her spine and traveled further down until she felt a particular throb of want. Faith wanted to return his comforting touch, even just to see if he would physically react the same way as she, but she didn't want to feel the disappointment. There was no way he would feel the same with her touch. Especially not with his lover in the same room as them, even if she was no longer there mentally.
"Do you truly believe your mother is right? That you're naive and stupid?" He asked.
Faith swallowed the lump that formed in her throat. "Yes."
Sadness shadowed over Aiden's face at her admission. "Despite some of the things you did for the cult, I know that deep down you are kind. To someone like Tracey she sees it as being too nice. But there's no shame in believing the best of people, even if some continue to disappoint us. It takes a lot of tenacity to still place that amount of faith in humanity."
She had nothing to say, Faith just kept her gaze downwards, her eyes focused on the large wet stain she left on his shirt from her childish tears.
Aiden lifted her chin with a gentle tug from a finger. His eyes looked so soft and caring, there wasn't a single sliver of judgement in his gaze. Faith felt like she could stare at the beauty of his cyan eyes for hours.
"A smooth talker? Yes. Manipulative? Absolutely. Observant? Very much so. You're a lot of things, Faith. But you're anything but stupid." He gestured to all of the books and notes scattered on the desk. "You've helped create something that not even professionals that have spent over a decade studying could achieve. I highly doubt a fraction of this stuff was taught in high school. You're crazy smart."
A small swell of pride bloomed in Faith's chest and she looked towards the floor again. The Father told her that she was gifted, the scientists she worked with said she was amazing, but strangely as she thought over their compliments, she found their praises empty. It felt like the Bliss itself was appreciated more than she was. Aiden's praise, on the other hand, made her feel like she was appreciated for herself and it brought a smile to her face. Maybe it was because he didn't like the Bliss as the others did? So his acknowledgement felt more personal and wholesome.
Something smooth slid along her left cheek. She looked up and saw it was Aiden's thumb.
"There's that real smile," he told her. "When you truly smile you get a dimple right here," he thumbed the corner of her cheek again.
Faith felt a flutter in her chest. She craved to place her hand over his, but the memory of his rejection of her kiss was still fresh, still stung, so she stayed her hand.
Finally, Aiden pulled his hand away. "And why do you feel like you do everything wrong?"
That was easy to answer. "I failed my purpose. The only thing the Father asked of me was to stay devoted to him, to protect his life with my own. And I failed," she paused and scoffed softly. "And now it seems like my leading by example was fruitless. I tried to be merciful, I wanted people to feel like I did, that they were saved by the Project. I wanted to prove that change didn't have to be a result of violence and suffering. But the people I led still preferred violence over my own methods."
The older male looked sad again. "You didn't fail the Father. Even now you're still devoted to him, in a way."
Faith shook her head. "I announced his hiding location. I provided a means for you and your people to protect yourselves from his defenses. That's not devotion, I betrayed him."
Aiden looked at her curiously. "Is it betrayal? You said he asked you to protect him with your life. You technically drowned for him. I had to resuscitate you. If you ask me, it seems like you did everything he asked of you."
She wasn't convinced. "But now? I've since betrayed him."
"It was for survival," Aiden defended.
Faith wanted to laugh. "I sold out the Father for drugs and…" she bit her tongue before she could admit her feelings to Aiden. He obviously caught her hesitation and looked at her with an eyebrow slightly raised, his eyes urged her to continue. She settled on a more watered-down reason, "...and acceptance."
"That's no different than why you signed up to follow him, isn't it? You said he plied you with drugs. Threatened you. Those things may have convinced you to side with him, but you remained loyal to him so you could be accepted and feel special. Right?"
The Bliss herald inhaled deeply. The quick stab of pain in her ribs served as a means to knock her out of her thoughts. Then she nodded before a yawn escaped her.
Aiden slapped his hands down onto his knees. "Rest, Faith. You'll feel better in the morning."
Feeling utterly drained, the younger woman took his advice and sought out the sleeping bag.
"Anyone tell you that you're awfully bossy at times?" She whispered as she settled into the sleeping bag. Her eyes closed.
Aiden chuckled. "All the time. I'm afraid I turn into a mother bear when it comes to the wellbeing of the people I care about."
Faith's eyes opened at his words. Even if he meant them in a platonic manner her chest tightened with affection. Actions always spoke louder than words and he was always there to shield her from harm, but it was still nice to hear him verbally confirm it. She pulled the sleeping bag so it covered the smile that grew on her face. Her finger unconsciously trailed towards her left cheek; she had no idea she even had a dimple when she smiled. No one ever told her so. And she never smiled when she looked at her own reflection.
Aiden stepped towards the door and Faith felt her heart jump to her throat. She didn't want him to leave just yet.
"Wait," she called to him. He paused and looked back at her, his head tilted in curiosity. "Can you...stay? Just until I fall asleep. Please."
She felt childish for acting so clingy to him, but his mere presence was so very warming and calming. Despite being in the Project's acceptance for years she was still plagued with nightmares that yielded many sleepless nights. The added stress of maintaining her duties and serving her purpose to the Father made sleep even more difficult. But with Aiden nearby she felt like sleep was but a blink away.
The older male was silent, but he complied with her request. He carefully stepped around her and sat on the desk.
"Can I ask you something?" Faith mumbled.
"You just did."
Faith rolled her eyes behind her closed eyelids.
"Go on," Aiden chuckled.
"What do you think I was to the Project? Even though I was part of the family, it felt like I was still not taken seriously."
Aiden hummed. "You were important to the cult in that you were the baby sister. That included the baby sister treatment. You were coddled and spoiled, but ultimately the big brother called all the shots."
Even though she grew up an only child, she understood enough about the hierarchy in families. Aiden's observation was simple, but still on point to how she felt herself.
"You seem to know how siblings act towards each other. Do you have any siblings?" She asked.
"No," Aiden responded.
Another thing they had in common, Faith thought. It was a small thing, but she enjoyed having things to relate to with him. "Did you wish you did?"
"Of course," Aiden replied. "It's lonely to raise an only child."
Faith hummed in agreement. She often wondered how differently things would be if she had a brother or sister, if she was the eldest or youngest.
"Would you have preferred a brother or sister?" She asked.
"I would want both," the deputy said. "A brother to play with, and a little sister to spoil."
Faith chuckled. "Why would you want to spoil a sister?"
"I don't know, it just seems like that's how it should be. As the eldest sibling they should want to take care of their younger siblings, but it just seems natural to want to be protective of the little sister. I'm sure any sister of mine could handle herself, but I would still want to be the annoying older brother that scares away the boys that express interest in dating my baby sister."
"If you would be the overbearing protective big brother, does that mean you would be the overprotective father if you have a daughter?" She had no idea why she was asking these questions. She just wanted to keep Aiden from leaving.
"You know it," Aiden agreed. "Knowing how it is to grow up without siblings, I want at least two kids of my own so they won't have to grow up feeling the same."
Faith smiled at that. She didn't know Aiden long, but she knew him enough to know he'd be a great father. They wouldn't grow up like she did, wondering what something as simple as love was. Wondering how a hug or a kiss on the forehead would feel. To experience being coddled when sick. Praised for any accomplishment no matter how trivial it was.
"What about you?" Aiden's question pulled her from her thoughts. "You want kids?"
She couldn't help but laugh at the question. "Even if I did accomplish to become pregnant sometime a child can't be raised in prison."
Aiden's face fell. "Right. Sorry I asked. I wasn't thinking."
"If...even if things were different, I don't think I would be a good parent."
"What makes you say that?"
Faith sighed. She took a moment to debate on admitting her feelings on children in general. Then she decided she had nothing to lose anyway.
"A baby is a sack of screaming, shitting, crying impulses with no personality, no thoughts, no understanding of the world beyond feelings. It has no soul. You have to give it one. The only soul we ever have, we receive from others." She thought about her so-called parents. She often wondered if the reason she was so passive was because she had only ever known fear and loneliness. "And it is only others who can take it away." She thought of the Father.
Aiden was silent after her mini rant.
"So, you see why I would be a terrible parent?" Faith asked. Then she said in a much lower voice, "what kind of person thinks of babies as soulless? What kind of person does that make me? I would probably be just like my own."
The junior deputy got off the desk and plopped down between Faith and Jess. It was a tight squeeze; he hugged his knees to avoid thumping into either woman.
"I don't think you would be like your parents. Despite the way they raised you, you don't look to hurt others the way you were hurt. You try to look for the best in people instead of expecting their worst. You know how it is to grow up without love. I think you would want to spare your own children from having to experience that type of pain and loneliness." He offered her a small smile. "I think you'll be a great mother. Protective, gentle, and loving."
Faith swallowed the lump in her throat. "Too bad I'll never find out."
They sat in silence for a moment. Faith hadn't realized her eyes closed until Aiden started speaking which made her feel a little more alert. "And your outlook on babies is definitely...full on glass empty. Like it's not even half empty for you, it's just empty. But, with your upbringing I completely understand your perspective. In some ways it's true, you know with the whole nature versus nurture debate." He glanced at the desk. "Plus, you're a scientist at heart. Your outlook is based more on logic rather than emotion."
As always, Aiden knew just what to say to make her feel better. She recalled he was more interested in what made people feel and think the way they did. He was definitely wasting his talents in law enforcement.
Faith hadn't realized she fell asleep until she woke up the next morning. Or was it the afternoon? Aiden was asleep next to her and Jess sat in her chair, her milky eyes watching the door.
Her back felt horrible. Despite sleeping on a very uncomfortable cot for the last week or two, sleeping on concrete was worse. Her back crackled and popped as she slowly climbed to her feet as quietly as she could manage. She only managed to step outside of the office when her entire body screamed, it was difficult to fight the urge to throw herself back in the sleeping bag and sleep the muscle aches away. Her stomach felt just as horrible, she knew it was a matter of hours until she felt even worse.
It was humorous how after her time in jail she became used to seldom showers. Before she needed to start her day with a shower so she wouldn't feel so dirty. But after all of the sweating she's done for the last 24 hours she was eager to feel clean again. Unfortunately, the brewery didn't have showers so she had to settle for a sort of sponge bath. She sweated throughout the evening so her clothes were damp which made her feel even more gross. She made a mental note to find a change of clothes from the office.
Despite how she felt physically, mentally she did feel refreshed. A full night's sleep was such a godsend to her. She was eager to return to her research while she still felt tolerable.
Faith hadn't expected for a blurred object to shove her back into the women's restroom the moment she stepped out. A hand clamped onto her mouth to silence her yelp of surprise. Burning pain flared along her back when she was pushed against the wall.
Her heart thumped like a hummingbird; it was the man that had threatened to shoot her for revenge of the woman that was killed for complaining about the Fathers statue. She struggled to pull out of his grip, but he pressed his free arm against her upper chest and his lower body pinned her legs against the wall. Her scream for help was muffled behind his hand.
His smile was predatory and hatred shined in his eyes. He leaned forward so he could whisper into her ear, Faith felt her entire body shudder. "Don't worry, I prefer my women to be willing."
Fear paralyzed Faith. She tried to bite his hand, but he kept a firm grip on her jaw. He was practically twice her size and his body easily smothered her against the tiled wall. She struggled to maintain some semblance of calm. He had to ease off of her if he meant to do what he implied. Once he created some distance she would strike. Or at the very least call for Aiden. Maybe even Jess.
The man must've planned this. With the arm holding her chest back, he reached behind his waist and then Faith's ears perked at the sound of metal clicking. Then she felt the cool kiss of metal press against the bottom of her chin.
"You move and I blow your pretty head right off. You do as much as open your mouth and I'll decorate these walls with your brain."
As much as Faith didn't want to cry in front of the man, she couldn't prevent the tears of fear from swelling in her eyes. It was one thing to feel confident in defending against assault, it was another thing entirely to experience it. The way he was able to easily overpower her nearly drained her will to fight back, the gun he pressed against her skin was successful to completely rob the little fight she had within her.
"And you'll do well to keep this secret between us, right? You wouldn't want me to go announcing to everyone that you're still alive. Imagine the fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, hell even the orphans you made would want to do to you?"
Faith hated that tears traveled down her cheeks.
"So how 'bout we make a little arrangement? Depending on your performances I'll remain silent." He smiled wickedly at her. "This brings back memories, doesn't it, Jessop?"
Realization dawned on Faith and she suddenly felt sick. In the back of her mind she had thought he looked familiar. Take away his beard and tattoos and she remembered a kid from high school. He was a senior when she was a freshman. He didn't deal drugs directly, but he had the connections. When she had approached him for information on a dealer, he was only willing to part for the information in return for sex.
She had refused. But he didn't take her rejection kindly. He had a lot of pull with the dealers at school, she supposed it had something to do with his status as a star baseball player. So, he arranged for every dealer to refuse business with her. She had eventually become so desperate she nearly accepted his offer. That was until she met Tracey. She didn't know what her former friend did to him, but he lifted her ban with the other dealers. But he hated her for it, some of the bullying she endured at school was because of him.
He chuckled as he dragged the barrel of his pistol along her slender throat. "In school you were still scrawny. But the last several years have treated you well. Guess it's a good thing you joined the Peggies, those drugs would have ruined your beauty."
He scrutinized her appearance and then his smile grew. "Or maybe you still snuck your hand in the cookie jar, huh? Who knows, if you do well enough I may even throw in a little something extra. My treat."
Faith felt her body shudder in repulsion, but it wasn't just from what he was offering. She was also disgusted with herself that she was almost willing to accept his offer just so she could have another dose. She hated how pathetic she became.
She watched as he did something to the gun and then he slowly pulled the barrel back. Despite her lack of knowledge in using firearms, she knew enough that he was cocking the gun. Again. No doubt it was to make her more nervous and afraid, and it worked. She should have done something while he had his hands off of her, but fear had paralyzed her.
Movement behind him caught her attention. He must've noticed her eyes drift because his eyes widened and he turned to look behind him. Faith saw a woman, she recognized her from Jess' group, her own handgun aimed within an inch from her former school mate's head.
"Or I could butt in and make a new arrangement?" She held a revolver and pulled the hammer back with her thumb, the audible click loud in the silent room. "Put that gun away, Brad, before you hurt yourself. Let's take a little walk outside, shall we? Depending on your performance I won't have to shoot someone who isn't a Peggie."
More memories flooded through Faith. So, Brad was his name. He looked the same as he did in high school, with the exception of his beard and tattoos. He almost looked strange to her without his Letterman jacket. He caught her gaze and scowled. His angry expression reminded her all too well of how he would glare at her each time they passed each other in school. She just wanted to melt into the floor and pretend none of this happened.
He turned to glare at her and Faith felt as if ice ran through her veins and she struggled to breathe. She feared he would shoot her. She was trapped between the small space between a stall and the wall.
Breathing became easier when he offered the woman his gun in an open palm, she slowly took it, but never lowered the gun from his head.
"Come on, Mr. Star-Cougar-Pitcher. Let's go for that walk."
Even after the two left the bathroom, Faith still couldn't muster the energy to move her legs. Her chest felt so awfully tight, no matter how much she inhaled it felt like her lungs just weren't getting any oxygen. The room began to spin so furiously she was afraid she would become sick all over herself.
"Hey."
Faith hadn't realized she was on the floor, her knees pressed against her chest, her arms wrapped around her legs. She looked up and saw it was the woman that saved her. The woman was very slow as she approached her, her hands were up to show she was empty handed. Faith felt tense when the woman touched her arm.
"Easy there, you're okay now. See? No one's here, but me."
The Bliss heralds breathing still came shallowly and she tried to curl into herself more.
"No more of that, yeah? Look at me."
The touch on her arm helped ground Faith. She slowly complied with the woman's order and looked up at her. The woman was maybe about twenty years older than her, black hair hung around her shoulders, sky blue eyes, and a burn scar crawled from under her shirt and snaked up onto her right cheek.
"That's it. Now look behind me. How many sinks are there?"
The younger woman's darker blue eyes drifted to the side. It felt like the room was still spinning, but she managed to count the sinks. "Two."
"Good, good. And how many mirrors?"
Faith frowned. Was there supposed to be more than just the one large mirror? "One."
"Do you know where you are?"
Where was she again? There were sinks and the large mirror showed the reflection of two toilet stalls. Faith felt herself nod. "The restroom."
"Yep. You're safe now. You want to go outside? The deputy is waiting for you."
Could she go outside to face Aiden? Did he arrest her former classmate? Faith didn't want to think about the complications she caused him. What if he was upset with her?
"If you don't want to see him, I can tell him to piss off."
Faith shook her head. The room wasn't spinning anymore and she just now realized her breathing was deeper, her lungs weren't crying for oxygen. She still felt shaky as she stood, the woman offered her own arm to help her up.
Faith felt utterly speechless. She would expect Aiden to treat her this way, but not some stranger. Especially a stranger that was with the resistance.
"Why did you help me?" Faith blurted.
The woman looked at her with a raised eyebrow and then shrugged. "I'm not one to just sit idly by and let a man force himself on someone even if that person is a Peggie."
"But—but he wouldn't have forced me," Faith didn't even know why she was defending Brad. It was easier to think he was giving her the option to refuse him rather than being forced.
The woman scoffed. "Maybe at first. But the moment you changed your mind and said no, do you think he would have accepted that?"
The thought sent another chill down her back. Soon she felt relieved and grateful the woman helped her. It would have been easier to keep on with her business.
"Thank you," Faith whispered. Then guilt hung deep inside her chest. They were on opposing sides in the county's conflict and she chose to lend a helping hand to an enemy. Had Faith hurt her in some way? Or hurt someone close to her? She wondered how she received that burn scar.
The woman shrugged before she gently pulled Faith towards the exit. "Yeah well, at least you're on our side now, right? Better late than never. Just don't make me regret this."
Before Faith could reply, they stepped out of the lavatory. Aiden was indeed waiting outside, pacing and looking beside himself. There was a deep wrinkle between his eyebrows, a mixture of worry and anger displayed on his face.
Faith felt herself becoming rooted on the spot again. She knew Aiden wouldn't be angry with her, she didn't do anything, but she couldn't shake the fear that he would become angry with her for causing a problem. It was a fear she developed because of her parents. Anytime she got in trouble at school her parents would become furious with her for causing problems, even if she wasn't at fault. With the Father, well she did her absolute best not to cause him any issues. She knew what would result in that.
Aiden stopped his pacing when he heard the door slam shut. Upon seeing her his eyes softened, he took three long strides and was next to her. He looked conflicted about something, but he kept a small distance from her.
"Are you okay?" His eyes quickly searched her over. His roaming eyes were nothing like her former schoolmate, he merely checked her over for any injuries.
Faith finally found her voice, but she couldn't help but wrap her arms around her torso. "I'm fine. Thanks to…" she turned to the woman beside her.
"Janna," the scarred woman replied.
Aiden ran his hand over his face and sighed deeply. Faith felt that tingle of fear.
"I'm sorry," she whispered automatically.
Both the junior deputy and the older woman looked at her as if she grew a second head.
"You have nothing to be sorry for," Aiden told her gently. He looked like he wanted to grab a hold of her arm, but he still refrained from touching her. "Come on, let's get you some breakfast."
She was led back to the office. Faith immediately felt better, the room was familiar and she breathed easier. Jess was still on her chair, her bow on her lap, her white eyes staring straight ahead.
"Protect her, Jess." Aiden ordered before he left the room.
Eager to get out of her sweat soaked clothes, Faith quickly searched for clothing that might fit her. She found a pair of dark blue jeans that were a little long but fit her perfectly. Black was her preferred color of a shirt to hide her sweat stains and the only black shirt in the pile had a large Hope County Cougar emblem. She scoffed as she donned the shirt.
Aiden was still gone. She sat behind the desk and waited. Her mind was still reeling from what happened and she knew she wouldn't be able to concentrate if she resumed her research. At least she felt safe in the room, even more so with Jess guarding her.
It was all so ironic. The biggest thorn in her side had been the resistance faction that referred to themselves as the Hope County Cougars and she was responsible for hurting and killing so many of them, some were turned to Angel's. Yet one of those resistance people helped her when she could have turned a blind eye.
How differently would things work out if she hadn't joined the Project? For one thing she knew Tracey would still be her best friend. Would she and Aiden have still met? Would she still have developed feelings for him? The next thought formed a lump in her throat. Would he still have rejected her if she tried to kiss him?
She jumped when the door suddenly opened and Aiden stepped inside holding a stack of plates. He gave one to Jess before he ordered her to eat, and then handed her one.
Breakfast looked to be more of last night's venison and scrambled eggs. She wondered where they managed to find fresh eggs. The smell of the food made her mouth water and her stomach cramped. She quickly tore into the food. It served as a good distraction.
Aiden gave her some time in peace to eat, not that Faith minded. She didn't know what to say so she appreciated their comfortable silence. Once they were both done with their meals, he took her empty plate and placed it aside.
"Faith, I need to know what happened. If you don't feel comfortable talking to me I can bring Janna in here."
She shook her head. "No that's okay." She took a deep breath and explained everything to Aiden. He remained silent and gave her his complete attention, but there were a few times where his jaw clenched.
When she finished her side of the story Aiden looked like he wanted to comfort her again, but he still kept his distance. Faith hated it. Of all times she felt she needed his comfort the most was now. But she couldn't think of a way to tell him that.
"He didn't touch you? Or force you in any way?"
The younger woman shook her head. "He just kept me pinned on the wall until he threatened me with his gun. Nothing else beyond that."
He nodded and exhaled deeply.
"Did I cause any problems?"
Aiden looked at her in bewilderment again. "Of course not. This mess is his fault. He approached you and threatened you." The anger in his eyes fizzled. "I arrested him, by the way. Sharky will be taking him to jail soon. The sheriff will keep an eye on him."
Faith bit her lip in concern.
"What's wrong?"
"What if he tells everyone where I am? He won't be the only one angry with me."
"We'll keep him separate from everyone. He won't be running his mouth to anyone but the sheriff."
That still didn't make her feel any better. But there was nothing she could do for the time being. And she was mostly happy everything turned out okay.
"I never asked Janna how she snuck in without being heard," Faith mused aloud.
"She said she was in one of the stalls and was waiting for you to leave. Then that's when Brad attacked. She watched him through the mirror and when he pulled out the gun she just waited for an opening."
Faith felt her chest swell with gratitude again. Between Janna's help and Aiden who always treated her so kindly, Faith felt motivated to return to her research. She would find a reversal for the Angels. It was the least she could do to undo all of the things she did to these people.
Aiden occupied his day writing makeshift reports from Faith and the woman that helped her, Janna. He would have a third one written from Brad, but he refused to talk. He gave Sharky the paperwork to hand to the sheriff when he would deliver the guy to the jail.
Part of him was worried about what Faith had said. No doubt Brad would blab to anyone within hearing distance of Faith's survival and her location. It would only take one person to hear him.
He couldn't risk people arriving in droves looking to harm Faith. Thankfully he had his radio and asked Sharky to warn him if people did find out. In the meantime, he put aside a vehicle should he and Faith have to make a quick escape.
There was not much else for him to do after the mess was settled. And it took a lot of his willpower to keep himself from slugging Brad. The thought of him trying to blackmail Faith in return for sexual favors infuriated him. Though he supposed it could have been worse. He was grateful that Janna intervened.
Sadly, something like this wasn't new to him. During his time as a prison guard he was exposed to a few cases of blackmail, rape and attempted rape. It was why he forced himself to keep his distance from Faith. He didn't want to add to her possible trauma, but she put up a strong front. Not long after the attack she acted like nothing happened and she returned to her books.
As complicated as the woman was, he couldn't help but to admire her. Yes, she sided with bad people and did horrible things for the sake of being accepted by them, but in the end, he couldn't fault her for it all. She was human and made mistakes. Huge mistakes that she would sadly have to pay for the rest of her life.
The thought of seeing her spend the rest of her life in jail saddened him. It felt like such a waste for someone like her.
There wasn't much for him to do at this point. He tried sneaking about the brewery to see how the others would react to Brad's arrest, but no one expressed any anger. Most agreed it was his own fault for testing a deputy from doing his job. Aiden was thankful for that small mercy.
Besides the arrest, Aiden's second highlight of the day was reporting to the sheriff and catching him up to speed on everything, but his boss had news of his own. The few remaining Chosen planes were defending the Father's island. That bought Faith some time to continue her research, at least.
Speaking of the Bliss herald, Aiden though, he grew worried each time he checked on her throughout the day. Her sweating became worse and when they both settled for the evening on the second night at the brewery, she did develop a fever.
"I'm fine, Aiden," she told him and turned her back to him, ending their conversation.
He wasn't going to let the subject just stop. "No, you're not," he argued, "if your infection came back…"
"My leg is fine."
"Show me."
The woman sighed and sat up. "If I show you that it's fine will you leave it be?"
"That depends," Aiden stood to turn the lights on. "If it's not your leg then what if it's another injury? One of the open welts on your back-"
"If it is an infection will you take me back to jail?" Even though Faith kept her face neutral there was a tiny shake in her voice. Her eyes displayed fear.
"No, I'll have to get Sharky to play delivery boy again. He won't be happy about it."
Faith looked relieved.
She then unwrapped the bandages from her leg and waited for Aiden to look. The wound was there, still slowly healing, but there was no pus, no inflamed skin around the bullet wound, and no red lines spreading across her thigh. Afterwards she turned away from him and lifted her shirt to expose her back.
Anger still rushed through Aiden when he peered over the many dark purple and blue bruises that marred her smooth milky skin. The red welts looked to be healing, the ones that split the skin looked to be in the early phases of scabbing, but there was no sign of infection.
Despite her injuries and illness Faith never complained. While the stress looked to be taking its toll on her, she refrained from snapping at him when he constantly reminded her to rest and eat. Aiden himself became mighty cranky whenever he was in pain. For Faith to show that restraint and keep on studying her books it only heightened his admiration for her.
He glanced at Jess. As usual, she remained silent as she sat on her chair and watched the door for any intruders looking to harm Faith. Two days of her silence, her white blank eyes, and having to treat her more like a robot than a human was maddening. He missed her restlessness for action. He missed her voice. He simply missed her. But knowing that she was the cause of Faith's injuries he still felt a flush of anger as he watched her. Despite what she did, Faith still saved her life. And now worked on bringing her back to normal.
"See?" Faith's tired voice pulled him out of his thoughts. She had lowered her shirt and was wrapping her leg with fresh bandages. "I'm fine."
He still wasn't convinced. "If that were true you wouldn't have a fever."
"It's...just the flu." She shrugged. "It'll pass."
Finally, he decided to let the subject drop for now. It was late and Faith had been researching tirelessly for two days. Her eyes and shoulders drooped in exhaustion.
Aiden figured he was just acting a little too concerned because he was feeling a bit stir crazy. He would only sit in one place long enough to heal, and those days consisted of him mostly just sleeping. But now that he was perfectly fine and was just playing the waiting game, he was feeling anxious.
Faith returned to her sleeping bag. Within moments her breathing slowed, she fell asleep. Aiden followed suit and climbed into the second sleeping bag he shared with Jess. Sleep was slow to claim him. He dreamt of Jess, Sharky, Grace and all of his other friends. They all approached him with milky white eyes, their arms outstretched towards him looking to claw and rip him apart. Despite the gun in his hands, he couldn't bring himself to shoot any of them.
He was startled awake by a hand shaking him. His movement was automatic and he nearly reached for his handgun, but he recognized Faith's voice in the thickness of his groggy mind.
The room was still dark. A gentle glow of the moon light shined through the window and when the rays struck Faith it made her light-colored hair appear almost white. Aiden felt his breath get caught in his throat as he looked at her. His heart thumped faster as she smiled at him. He couldn't see it with the little light, but he knew her smile was wide enough to form that little dimple on her cheek. He squashed the urge to reach for it with his thumb.
"What? What's wrong?" He looked around and found Jess was still seated, unmoving.
"I figured it out," Faith grinned and stood. She offered him her hands and helped pull him to his feet.
Aiden felt his heart beat ever faster and his head felt light. "You mean the cure?"
Faith nodded and stepped towards the desk. "I couldn't sleep," she muttered, "so I went back to work. The easy part is done, at least."
The junior deputy frowned at her words and reached for the lights. How did Faith manage to study in the dark? The natural light from the moon lit up her working area well, but surely it must've strained her eyes.
"Why didn't you turn on the lights?"
Faith shrugged. "I didn't want to wake you."
Aiden didn't know what to say. She strained her eyes just so he wouldn't be disturbed? Her kindness was truly something else. He couldn't fathom how anyone could even consider treating her the way she had gone through before the cult.
Faith reached for a paper and showed it to him. The mess of letters and numbers only confused him. Then he realized the bottom portion of the paper had a list of chemicals.
"The easy part?" He echoed her words.
"It's one thing to figure out what I'll need to inject into an Angel to bring them back. But the compound itself is unstable if it's not made correctly. That was the tricky thing to figure out. And I'll still need to work on actually making it."
"And these?" Aiden tapped the paper with a finger. "This is what you'll need?"
Faith nodded, but she looked away and bit her lower lip. "However, one of the things I'll need I can't get it here."
"Point me where to go and I'll get it," Aiden said automatically. He glanced at Jess and smiled; he was eager to get his friend back. And all of the other people that were turned to Angels. A stab of guilt struck him when he realized the many Angels he's killed before could have been spared and they too could have been brought back.
"That's the thing," Faith explained. "What I need is the water from the hot springs from the King's Hot Springs Hotel. If the water cools, I can't use it. Reheating it is out of the question; it will ruin the compounds in the water."
Relocating concerned him. While the hotel had been liberated by the resistance, it would mean exposing Faith to more people. Unless he tried hiding her identity again. But how could he explain her doing some science experiment with the hot springs?
Faith knew what he was thinking. "I'm done hiding, Aiden." She stood taller and lifted her chin. "The resistance won't trust me and some will want to hurt me, I understand that and deserve it. But I know they won't do anything until I'm done with the cure. Once I create it and bring Jess back...well we can cross that bridge when it comes."
A great, heavy sigh escaped the junior deputy. Despite the risk, what Faith stated was true. A lot of people lost their loved ones when they were turned into an Angel. With the prospect of getting them back, it would be enough to tame their hatred for the woman standing before him. Until she presented the reversal. Once that time came, he would just have to do what he's been doing best for the last few weeks and smuggle her to safety. Hopefully by then they can finally approach the Father and be done with this nightmare.