Book Three, Part Three: She's Mine

Meredith's Point of View

"It's later." Lexie announced as she came into my kitchen and put a bag on the counter.

"What?" I asked.

She gave me a knowing look and began unloading her items. I swear that bag was never ending. When she was finished, I looked wide eyed at the ice cream, sundae syrups; chocolate, strawberry and pineapple, chocolate chips, colorful sprinkles and spray can of Cool Whip. She pulled a brown paper sack out of her purse and put it on the counter. She pulled out the bottle of tequila with a raised eyebrow.

"Ooh, Jose." I crooned, taking it from her.

The door opened and closed, and Mark entered, with Molly behind him.

"Molly." I hugged her. "What are you doing here?"

"Lexie said it was Def Com Three, so I left Laura with Mom." She said.

I looked at Lexie, bewildered. She in turn ignored my look and flashed an annoyed one at Mark.

"You can leave us now. Go do…manly things. We are having a girl's night." She demanded curtly.

He scowled at her and then looked at me in askance.

"It's fine. I am fine. I will talk to you later." I smiled softly at him and kissed him on his lips.

He hesitated but nodded and made his way out of the front door, after grabbing his coat and keys.

Molly looked around.

"Where's Mia?" She asked.

Lexie looked up from where she was assembling her ice cream sundae.

"She is at Cristina's. I dropped her off there on my way here."

"Didn't you think to ask me first?" I asked.

"No, you have some explaining to do. Now make your dessert and grab the shot glasses." She demanded.

"You know, this is my house." I informed her.

"You are my sister and I love you. Normally, you are the most put together human on the face of this earth but today you were a mess. And I want to know why. Besides this is what sisters do." She said.

"Butt into my business and kick my boyfriend and daughter out?" I asked.

"Yes." Molly piped in, getting out the spoons.

"Okay…"

We all made our way into the living room and got comfortable. I was going to divulge only what was necessary.

Or so that was the plan…

"How do you know Dr. Shepherd?" Lexie asked.

"Wow, you just get right to the point, don't you?" I asked.

"Okay, I am lost. What the hell happened today?" Molly asked. "Not a doctor, remember. I don't work with you two."

'It was nothing." I said.

Lexie snorted and turned to Molly.

"This apparently hot shot doctor started today, and Bailey is all over the moon about it, right? So, she is doing this grand introduction and Mer walks in, takes one look at the dude and his wife and passes the fuck out. Right there with everyone watching. Mark carried her to an exam room with Cristina and I right behind him. And who is hot on my heels? The doctor and his wife. We all crammed into this tiny exam room. Mark was panicked, Bailey and I were confused, Cristina was throwing glares at this guy, who was planted right beside the door. Then Mer cleared the room out and he stayed in there for a good little while. So, now that you are caught up to 'As Mer's World Turns', maybe Mer can fill in the blanks."

They both turned to me expectantly.

Shit.

"Um…well." I paused and downed a shot, wincing at the fire shooting down my throat. "I knew him, Derek, a long time ago. We were…close and he left. It hurt and I haven't seen him in fifteen years." I shrugged. "It just surprised me to see him, that's all." I forced a laugh.

Lexie gazed sidelong at Molly who returned the same disbelieving look.

"So he was just a friend?" Molly asked smiling.

"Yes." I said, sighing audibly in relief.

"Okay then." Lexie nodded. "If he was just a friend, then mind telling me why Mia has his eyes?"

Molly gasped and I slumped against the couch, defeated.

"You caught that, huh?" I asked tiredly.

"Yeah, I did. I am very observant like that. So, tell us what really happened."

"Lexie, maybe we should let this be. It obviously is not a happy story and it sounds like she has had quite a day." Molly gently suggested.

I shook my head.

"No, it's okay. I met Derek when I was in high school and he was this geek. I became friends with his sister, and I started spending time with them and we just clicked. I loved him. He was my first…everything. He was everything." I mused, swiping away at my tears that had fallen. I cleared my throat. "One day after my eighteenth birthday he came to my house, took me on a walk and proceeded to tell me that he was leaving and that he was tired of pretending he loved me and that I was no good for him."

They both gasped. Lexie looked downright murderous.

"So he just left you there, pregnant?" Molly asked.

"In his defense, he didn't know about Mia. I didn't know about Mia until three months later. I had no way to find him. It is amazing to me that a family of six can disappear off the face of the earth, but apparently they can." I smiled gently at them. "But I had Mark. He was Derek's best friend and he never left my side. It took him a long time of just being my friend before I would give him anything more, but he has been my lifeline. He has been a great father to Mia and a great guy to me." I said.

"Do you love him?" Lexie asked, concentrating on her hands.

"Mark? Yes, I do." I told her.

"The same as you did Derek?" Molly asked.

I sighed.

"No. But just as strong in a different way." I said.

"Are you going to tell Mia?" Lexie asked.

"No!" I said, frantic. They looked at me wide eyed.

"Mer, you have to tell him sometime. If he sees her, he will figure it out eventually."

"I will just keep them apart." I said.

"Isn't Mia working at the hospital this summer?" Molly asked.

"Shit! Still I will keep her out of the surgical wing. It is a big hospital." I said.

"Don't you think he has a right to know?" Lexie asked.

"He left me. He has no rights pertaining to anything in my life that happened after he left. And that includes my daughter." I said fiercely.

"What about Mia? Doesn't she have the right to know her father? She has this whole other family out there." Molly asked cautiously.

I shook my head at her.

"She will resent you if she finds out that her father was here, and you knew it and didn't tell her." Lexie said.

"Please don't argue with me about this. Please." I pleaded. "He took my life away from me when I was eighteen and I will be damned if I let him take my daughter."

"Okay, but one last thing and we will eat and drink and talk about…Twilight or some shit…No matter what happened between you two, it is not about you two. It is about Aves. Remember that before you make any hard and fast decisions, okay?" Lexie said.

I nodded and was grateful when Molly started talking about Laura and some cute thing she had done today.

It didn't matter what I had told Lexie. I had made up my mind.

Mia was mine.

Derek Shepherd and his Stepford Wife weren't getting their hands on her.

"Mom! Why can't I work in surgery? Why am I being put with the babies?" She whined.

"I thought you loved the nursery?" I asked, checking to see if it was safe to switch lanes. I was a bundle of nerves, but Mark had agreed with me in that Mia was a secret better kept from Derek at this moment.

She, however, wasn't happy I was switching her job duties. Bailey had been confused but had acquiesced to my request to keep her off the surgical wing.

"I love babies, as long as they are coming out of an open body cavity and I can see the ovaries and crap." She told me.

She was definitely my daughter, I thought wryly.

"Well I am sorry, but you will have just as much fun with the babies that come out the more traditional way." I informed her.

"Hmmpf." She grumbled and crossed her arms.

"How is Jake?" I asked, knowing it would have her chattering up a storm, just like her…

Father.

Ugh.

I felt guilt flood through my body, but I pushed it back. He had left us, not the other way around.

'Yes but he didn't know it was 'us', he thought it was only you', my subconscious said.

Great now I was hearing voices. Must have hit my head harder than I thought.

'He deserves to know', it taunted me.

"Shut up." I muttered.

"What?" Mia paused in the middle of whatever Jake story she was into.

"Oh not you baby." I assured her.

"Um…then who?" She asked.

"I was talking to myself?"

"You were telling yourself to shut up? Nice one Mom. As I was saying."

And off she went.

Now why would I want to share that with him?

'Because everything you love about her most is part of who he was.'

Oh shut the fuck up.

"Mom?"

Crap I had said that out loud, again.

"Are you okay?" She asked concerned.

"Yes baby, I just hit my head yesterday and I have a headache." I smiled reassuringly at her.

"How could you hurt that hard thing?" She joked.

Yes why would I want to share that with them?

I sighed and prayed for a miracle.