Hospitals are so boring. If I wanted to die of boredom I would have asked John to tell me about work.
Why are they taking everything away from me? It's not fair, it's none of their business if I want to use drugs... it's none of their business if I want to skip eating, it's none of their business, it's none of their business!
John keeps asking me if I'm okay, I keep telling him I'm fine. Why won't he leave me alone?
Mycroft keeps asking me if I intend to keep landing myself in the hospital. My answer... we'll leave it at it was mildly inappropriate and caused me to be forced to stay in this wretched hospital longer.
The doctors told me I could go home yesterday, but they're stalling. I'm very displeased. I wish to return to my flat so that I can resume normal activities.
What are normal activities, Sherlock?
Quiet.
Cutting yourself?
Get out of my head.
I'm you, Sherlock.
Leave me alone.
Never.
The nurses took my violin away last night, I want it back.
"Why don't we put this somewhere safe?" The nurse, whatever her name is, took the violin from the foot of my bed.
"No!" I gasped. "Give it back."
"We need to put this somewhere that it will be safe." Her voice was patient.
"You're having relationship difficulties." I snapped. "Your left ring finger has a tan line suggesting a ring has been recently removed, it s also red and irritated as if the skin has been worked, presumably by the ring you removed. You have a phone in your pocket, meaning you're expecting a call, given the removed ring, and the phone, it suggests you are having relationship difficulties, should I go on?"
"What are you?" She looked disgusted.
"The worlds only consulting detective." I tried to take the violin from her, she just moves it further from my reach.
"I'm going to put this in a patient locker, you can have it back when you leave."
"Give it back!" I yelled at her.
"It's not safe for it to be in here, you're on suicide watch, and I'm not sure this is a good thing to have in here."
"Since when am I on suicide watch?" I was frustrated.
"You were put on it this morning."
"I was told I could leave this morning!"
"We'll, I suppose you must have showed signs of being suicidal." With that, she left.
"Fuck you, Mycroft." I growled under my breath. "Just fuck you."
"Knock, knock." A voice pulls my attention.
"What?" I snarl, angry and upset still about the loss of my violin.
"Easy." The voice belongs to John. "How are you feeling?"
"Fine." My arm cross over my chest, and I can't help but wish things were different.
Different how? different in you had your violin so you wouldn't be pouting like a baby?
Shut up!
"Where's you violin?" John sounds confused, but it's an act. I'm sure of it.
"Don't act so innocent, you know where it is." I can feel tears in my eyes, but I fight them back.
Go ahead and cry like a baby, you are a baby after all.
Leave me alone, just shut up.
Make me.
"Sherlock... did something happen?" He sounds unsure.
"You know very well what happened, fuck you, fuck Greg or whatever his name is, and especially fuck Mycroft!" I half scream at the blonde.
"Sherlo-... what happened?" John sits on the edge of my bed.
"Nothing." I close my eyes against the tears that are now threatening to fall.
Baby.
Leave me alone.
You're such a weak baby, you cry all the time and you are a fake.
No, I'm not a fake.
But, you are a weak baby.
...
"No, tell me what happened."
Refusing to speak, I pull my knees up to my chest and bury my face in them.
Stupid whiney baby.
Can you please just piss off?
Nope.
"Sherlock."
"Go away." Taking several deep breaths, I try to keep from crying.
I'm the worlds only consulting detective.
Stop mocking me.
I know you're having relationship issues because blah, blah, blah, stupid stuff that doesn't evEN MATTER!
Why won't you leave me alone?
"I'm calling Mycroft, stay here." John's voice is soft, I feel his weight leave the bed, and I hear his footsteps leave the room.
Look what you did, you chased him away. Pathetic.