Chapter 35

We trudged into Pandora's section of the dungeon. I tried to stay on the bright side. "At least we don't have to really fight her; it's just a look-a-like."

Pandora called out, "I wouldn't be too sure about that, worm!"

I groaned. "Ew."

Lady Viridi asked, "What's your beef with Pandora anyway?"

I admitted, "I don't even remember."

Pandora hissed, "Maybe it's because you treat me like I'm garbage!"

You're an evil being and the goddess of calamity. You ARE garbage.

I pretended I didn't hear that and continued advancing through the rooms as a bunch of remoblam and remoblamlings approached. I took out the remoblams and dodged as the remoblamlings exploded. An erinus showed up afterward, and I meleed it until it burst.

I noticed a chest, and went over to collect some goodies. A pair of legs sprouted from underneath and made a move to catch me in a kicking flurry. I ran out of the way, but the mimicutie managed to catch me and gave me a fierce roundhouse kick to the face.

I collapsed on the floor. Hades guffawed. "That's what I call gumption! Yes, yes! Kill the angel! Make him suffer!"

Arlon came to my rescue and shot energy beams at it. I did my part by fleeing (in a totally heroic way). Once it was dead, I high-fived Arlon. "Nice work, partner! We're making great progress!"

After a while of fighting and avoiding big injuries, we reached a Drink of the Gods. I washed down its contents. "I think this means that Pandora is in the next room, right? Please, please, please, please, PLEASE let this mean that she's in the next room."

Lady Viridi rolled her eyes. "Then why don't you find out? Honestly, Pit."

Hades kicked his feet back. "I am so looking forward to this. Pretty Pandora, wipe the floor with him."

I criticized, "Hey, I didn't even step in the room yet!"

Lady Viridi yelled, "THEN GO IN!"

I protested, "Stop yelling at me! I'm only a little Pit."

I creaked the door open a smidge and firmly walked in. "Okay Pandora, it's time you met your fate for good! Seriously, how many times did Hades revive you during this crisis? Like five?"

The goddess of calamity flipped her hair over her shoulder. "It's not my fault the Lord of the Underworld has a soft spot for beautiful women."

I gagged. "Never say that again. I do NOT want to hear about Hades' love life!"

Pandora flung a few heart-shaped bombs in my direction. I dodged them, and Arlon chucked them back at her. Once they exploded in her face, I meleed her until she punched me in the face and kicked him a good distance.

Figuring that getting close was a bad idea, I fired a bunch of arrows at her. Arlon covered the room in darkness and struck her with his sword. I kept up the arrow attack. Hades snapped his fingers and the light came back on. "Gotta help out my old pal Pandora!"

Many treasure chests appeared out of thin air. I warned, "Get away from them! You'll get hurt if you get to close!"

We both carefully maneuvered around the chests and continued our attack. After what seemed like a lifetime, she finally collapsed. Arlon landed in front of me and held out his arm. "Stay back! This is a ruse."

Pandora vanished. Lady Viridi observed, "This time she didn't do a fake-out. For once."

Lady Palutena shrugged. "She must've felt that she was getting predictable."

Arlon and I were transported back to the entrance. I dipped my toes in the hot spring again. "This never gets old."

Lady Palutena gasped. I cried out, "AAH! What's wrong?!"

Lady Palutena composed herself. "Nothing-sorry. It's just that I didn't realize how quickly time flew. It's nighttime. I think you and Arlon have to camp out here and finish the journey tomorrow."

I crossed my arms. "Fine! But I am sleeping in the hot spring, and there's nothing you can do that will change my mind!"