Chapter 33: All That Scheming

"Lizzy?"

"Hmmmm?" Elizabeth was staring out the window, and she didn't budge in response to Lydia.

"Lizzy."

"I heard you the first time. What is it?"

"Why aren't you looking at me? Are you mad at me?"

Elizabeth held back a sigh, and left the window to sit on her bed, beside Lydia's. It wouldn't do to put Lydia on edge at such a critical juncture. "Of course I'm not made at you! It's been a long flight, I'm just a bit tired and…go check out the view. Singapore city lights is quite beautiful."

"Aren't you going to dry your hair?"

"Air drying is one way to achieve that goal."

Lydia made a face, but didn't argue the point. "Lizzy, if I…"

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes when Lydia failed to complete the sentence. "If you what?"

"Darcy called."

Elizabeth almost jumped off the bed. "When?! How? When?"

Lydia raised an eyebrow. "You were in the shower…he called that phone," she said, pointing at the hotel telephone.

"And?"

"And nothing. He wanted to know whether we had a good flight, whether we were okay, blah blah blah…and the same damn instructions I've been told 7 bajillion times already. He was crotchety and annoying."

It was the complete lackadaisical attitude in Lydia's voice that pushed Elizabeth over the edge. "And I bet you didn't even have the courtesy to say 'thank you', did you? You're such a…such an ungrateful wretch!"

Lydia gasped in surprise. "Hey! I…that's…don't be so mean!"

"Mean? Mean?! You don't have an iota of common sense in you, got yourself into this ridiculously awful situation…you've compromised yourself and put so many, many people in completely untenable positions, we're all bending over backwards to helping you, and all you can do is whine and complain and be so utterly disrespectful to someone trying to help you."

Lydia's eyes were as wide as saucers. "I just said…"

"Well, don't!" Elizabeth snapped. "Don't just say anything. Don't ever just say anything. Think. Think in that tiny, teeny pea-brain of yours about what you're about to say or do, and if it's something you would have said or done before you ever got arrested, then take that as a sign to keep your mouth shut."

"What on earth has gotten into you Lizzy? I should have asked for Jane!"

"You know what Lydia? You shouldn't have asked for anyone. All this time, I thought you were silly and stupid like Mother, but no. You're just callow and selfish like Dad. It's you you you. It's all about Lydia, and to hell with everyone else. I'm so…you know, no one is expecting you to turn into Jane overnight. Or ever. But a modicum of gratitude, or some common sense is almost mandatory at this point."

Elizabeth fell back onto her bed, and rapidly blinked back tears of anger and frustration. It wasn't all Lydia's fault, and she should apologise for her outburst, but Elizabeth was bone weary of putting up a brave front, of fixing everyone's problems, and not seeing a change in anything or anyone around her. One was supposed to stick by their loved ones through thick and thin, but she was sick and tired of doing precisely that. Elizabeth wondered – not for the first time – if Lydia had been less self-absorbed and more circumspect at that last meeting, whether Darcy would have been so quick to give up.

Jane and Charlotte had both insisted – no, demanded – that she say and do nothing at that time, and instead concentrate on getting through her finals. Elizabeth did not regret following their advice. But now, her finals were over, and once George was hopefully dealt with, she was going to be faced with some serious decision making.

Elizabeth sighed deeply. She didn't bother sitting up or even looking at Lydia, but she did start to speak. "Lydia, look…"

"It's true then," Lydia interrupted her.

"What's true?"

"Mary told me…" Lydia scoffed. "Well, when does Mary ever just tell me anything? She scolded me and berated me and told me that it was because of me that you and Darcy broke up. That I was the reason for the rift between Dad and you and Jane. That I would regret insisting you come with me, because if she were you, she'd push me in front of a moving train and call it a day's work."

At this, Elizabeth did sit up. Her immediate thought was that Mary's choice of words had been in poor taste, but, pushed to the edge, her own diatribe had not been much better. Elizabeth struggled to find the right thing to say. "I would never push you in front of a moving train, Lydia. I don't hate you. I just…I think I've reached my limit. I can't walk this tightrope anymore, being annoyed inside and trying to keep the peace and pretending and…"

Lydia knotted her fingers together. "It's all so complicated and harder than I thought. I thought…first…at that meeting, after Mary…if I insisted enough, Darcy would be here with us and then the two of you would just…"

"Just what? Make up, like in a movie?"

Lydia nodded. "Why wouldn't you have?"

"Because life isn't a movie! If all that needed to happen was for us to be in the same room together, I can well manage that on my own. Do you have any idea how terrible it looked, you being so selfish and petulant and insisting on having your own way, when Darcy and Richard and Dave had done so much to help you? That is why Darcy and I aren't together – because he thinks my family is bat crap crazy and that I'm forever stick by you guys."

"I thought I was helping," Lydia said in a small voice.

Elizabeth reached over and held Lydia's hand. "I know," she said in a much softer voice. "I appreciate that, Lydia. But you can't…you need to start growing up now. You can't just get your own way because you insist. And it's also not okay to demand that it's your way or the highway. You need to learn to stop being so selfish, even if you're coming from a good place."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you he called. I figured that he'd worry and call you back. I was playing hard to get for you."

"Lydia. Oh, Lydia. It's not a game. None of this is a game. You have to stop scheming. Yes, Darcy could have worried. He could have also thought that we were a pair of incompetent, ungrateful wretches and he shouldn't waste another minute of his time on us."

Lydia bit her lower lip. "What are you going to do?"

"Fix this, obviously." Elizabeth sighed. "I'm going to get dressed, go out and get dinner for us. Can I trust you to speak to no one, do nothing, and stay inside this room until I come back?"

Lydia nodded mutely.

"And what do you do if George contacts you?"

"Call you?"

"WRONG! You first contact Richard. Then you call me."

Lydia nodded, wide-eyed. Biting her tongue, Elizabeth briskly walked up to the dressing table, and fished out Lydia's lipstick from her bag.

Richard 2. Elizabeth, she wrote in big, bold letters on the mirror. "Now you won't forget."

Elizabeth fished out her cellphone as soon as she felt it beep.

Darcy: Everything okay?

Yes, Elizabeth typed. Sorry I missed your call. I'm also really sorry that Lydia is such a selfish idiot. I heard she was being stupid when you called.

It took over five minutes to get a response.

Darcy: It's fine, she was fine. You don't have to keep apologising to me for others. It's going to get tiring after a while. And you should never have to apologise for other people. Doesn't it drain you?

There was no point apologising for Lydia; this was precisely what Darcy had meant when he had talked about frustrations and resentments. Constant apologies were going to take its eventual toll, and, going by her outburst with Lydia, it already had. It's more draining at the end of day than early morning, she typed. It seemed a suitably lighthearted response, all things considered.

Darcy: I hope you had a good flight. I'm sorry it was such a cheap flight and is such a cheap hotel, but Richard insisted on it.

A few minutes later, Darcy sent another message. Insisted not because of budgetary issues, you understand. He insisted on it for appearances, just in case things went wrong and George ended up meeting you.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. Will you relax, she typed. I didn't think for a moment that you guys were penny-pinching. She tried a different tack. How's the trial been so far?

In fact, Darcy or no Darcy, Elizabeth knew deep down that she had reached the end of her tether when it came to her family. She couldn't keep doing this. She was mentally and emotionally exhausted, and felt so bitter when it came to her family.

Of course…of course, there was an easy, obvious answer. There was no reason to live like this, if she didn't want to.

She looked down at her phone, and read the latest message from Darcy. As she started typing a response, the phone vibrated again, and she read the message from Lydia. Then she quickly retyped her response to Darcy.

Sorry, have to go. It's happening. GW just called L; he somehow made it and is on his way to see her. Will keep you posted.

A/N: Happy 2020 everyone! Sorry for the ridiculous delay in updates; in the middle of a super annoying fight with my awful landlady. Hope everyone has a kickass 2020!