November 1069

So, there I was, in a room with the King of England and someone who I soon would identify as Armaund Malfoy, his secret court wizard, and I had just made the best first impression. But don't worry, I salvaged things in a fairly effective manner:

I looked the king up and down and said, "I thought you'd be taller."

William's other eyebrow rose to join his first. "Whereas you, it seems, are as gigantic as rumored." He sounded almost exactly like Robert, only a little less gruff.

"I ate my Wheaties," I said.

His expression grew confused, and in that moment of distracted weakness I nodded politely.

"As I told you, your highness, he's an uncivilized boor," the all-blue man said.

I turned to look at all-blue man and very carefully looked him up and down. "And you, it seems, must be the man with a particularly unfortunate last name. Or maybe particularly fitting. I'm not sure yet."

Malfoy gave me a disgusted look.

"I'll take that as a yes," I said before turning back to William. "What can I do for you, your highness?"

William glanced back over his shoulder at Malfoy – who, I finally noticed, was standing away from the walls and the tables and had his hands folded into his sleeves – before looking back at me. "My advisor informs me that you and some associates of yours wish to found a school on my land."

Oh that son of a bitch.

"Potentially," I said slowly, wondering how much Malfoy knew and how much he had told William. "Our prime location is somewhere in Scotland, actually." I glanced and stared in Malfoy's direction, daring him to say anything about Edinburgh. "I can't really say much more than that at this juncture."

"That may not remain the case for much longer," William said. "King Malcolm of Scotland has been harboring a number of my enemies, including a claimant to my throne."

"Well, be that as it may," I said, not really having a good response to 'I might invade another country in the near future.'

"Be that as it may," William said. "I am still curious as to why this is the first, or I suppose second, I am hearing of this."

"There were and are a lot of practical concerns to figure out first," I said.

"The approval of the sovereign to build on his land was not a practical concern?" he asked.

"Considering we haven't even gotten to the design stage, no, not yet," I said. Then, deciding that playing defense wasn't getting me anywhere, I gestured to Malfoy. "And whatever your advisor may or may not have told you, people like me and him generally stay out of regular politics. When we don't, well, there was that whole mess with King Arthur."

William frowned thoughtfully and turned to look at Malfoy. "I thought that was a story, a myth."

"It's certainly unclear how much is true, and how much is embellishment," Malfoy said after a moment, caught by surprise at the shift in topics and with too many eyes on him to waste time coming up with real bullshit. "But there's certainly some truth to the legends."

"Especially the crazier ones. I've had the… great yet troublesome honor of working alongside one of the wielders of Excalibur, so I can personally attest to that."

Malfoy gave me such a bizarre, confused look that I almost burst out laughing, while both William and Robert looked more normally confused.

"Excalibur is real?" William asked.

I nodded. "More properly called Amoracchius, the Sword of Love. It's a rather important holy sword."

As the confused silence stretched into awkward silence, I pulled back a chair and sat down, and wished that John were here.

"As to the subject of our or my prospective school, there just simply isn't much to talk about right now," I said, trying to turn the conversation back around in my favor. "We don't have a definite idea as to what we wish to create or how, just a vague guiding vision. When we've firmed up the details a little, then it would be time to talk about rights, and obligations, and location, and logistics, and all those details. Right now, it's still just an idea, and we didn't want to waste your time by presenting you with a possibility that we ended up determining to be distinctly impossible after another few months or years of work."

"Mayhaps," William said slowly. "But by the same token, if I disapprove, that is itself an issue you will have to… struggle with."

I suppressed a sigh and nodded.

"Then what is your vague guiding vision?" he asked.

I glanced at Robert, then back at William. "Put simply, a standardized education, practical, ethical, and philosophical, for all those with the gift of magic. To bring people together, and preempt and prevent the rise of warlocks and dabblers in black magic rather than deal with it after the fact."

"A standard put together by outcasts and renegades," Malfoy said. "Like the man in front of you."

"Renegade?" William asked.

"He's just mad I didn't spend two months of my life sailing back and forth to join his club," I said.

"You rejected a summons–"

"They set frankly unreasonable terms and it was entirely unnecessary to travel all that way just to get registered and tested. In fact, I'm fairly certain I'm registered now, after being tested, by my colleagues, following the established guidelines and procedures and tests, who weren't hidebound idiots about the process," I replied. "I can go dig out the stole, if you want." I sighed and turned back to William. "There are two arguments or discussions going on here, King William. The internal policy one between me and Armaund here, and the schooling one between you and me. Considering you must have a great number of responsibilities, one is more pressing than the other."

"Hmm. And what would these students do, after their education was finished?" William asked.

"The same as right now: live their lives, privately. Just with a better grounding and understanding of the world," I said. "Maybe some would choose to serve you, your descendants, your court, so on. Certainly the more battle-minded and inclined would act in the magical defense of your land and people. But if you're implying a more formal and feudal obligation, in general, then that is simply not happening."

After a few moments, William nodded. "I can respect your directness, at least."

"Is that a no?" I asked.

"it is not a yes," he said. "I presently don't see much advantage to allowing such a concentration of force within my lands. But if, as you said, if you are still… designing, then perhaps you will consider that factor, and I will reconsider my opinion." He turned to look at Robert. "In the meantime, brother, you mentioned some issues with your estates in Cornwall."

"Aye," Robert said. "My steward there reports some problems with the destruction of farmsteads and the murder of families that he hasn't been able to solve himself. With the campaign I don't have the time to look into it, unless you mean to have us camp for the winter."

"Quite the opposite," he said, glancing at Malfoy for a moment. "But if it is a problem I could have someone look into it."

Robert grunted and glanced at me. I barely stopped myself from rolling my eyes. "Yes, Earl Robert, I can go. Can I have a writ to commandeer some guards in case it turns out to be a mundane case of bandits?"

"And if it isn't?" Robert asked.

"Well, that really depends on what it is. Some of the things that go bump in the night, the only help a group of guards could provide against them is to die first. And I don't like people dying for me," I said.

"Perhaps the two of you should go together, in the event there is a serious problem," William suggested.

That was a horrible idea on so many levels and also something I couldn't reject without seeming unreasonable or getting into things I didn't want to get into.

I should just make a Bingo card for my life. The prize would be extra disappointment.

I held back a sigh and turned to Robert. "Where is your, let's say administrative capital in Cornwall?"

"Trematon Castle," he replied. "Overlooking the Sound at the south edge of the county border with Devon. Everything in Cornwall is west or north of it."

"And your steward there?"

"Reginald de Vautort, who rules the castle in my name," he replied.

"So go to Trematon, Cornwall, talk to Reginald, and see what the problem is," I sighed.

William 'excused' me and Malfoy right out of the room, though we barely made it six feet out the door before I turned around and looked down at him.

"Do you actually have any experience with investigations? Or monster-hunting?" I asked in Latin.

Malfoy blinked once, maybe a little surprised by my switch and grasp of languages, before schooling his expression and giving me the cold politician look. "Do you?"

"Let's see, I've fought and killed faeries, Sidhe, vampires, ghouls, immortal regenerating ghouls, various types of undead, various types of demons, big, small, and very big, warlocks, necromancers, aaand an Outsider," I said. "You?"

Malfoy blinked.

"Oh, right, no, not just an Outsider, he was a Walker."

Malfoy blinked again.

"Thought so," I said. "Now, do you have a horse?"

It took a few moments for Malfoy to recover, at which point he put his politician face back on.

"I don't see how that's any of your concern," he said.

"Well, I mean, I guess it isn't, strictly speaking, but is going to be a pain to walk all the way to Cornwall. Since, you know, revealing the secrets of magic to regular people, like the Ways, is against policy. Especially for personal gain," I said, affecting faux-concern for a few moments before dropping it. "And anyway, I'll be the one with the writ, and I'm going by horse. So if you want to go ahead by the Ways and operate as a vigilante outlaw, go ahead." I shrugged. "Just keep in mind I'll know that, and it's not the king I'll bring my concerns to."

Malfoy didn't narrow his eyes, but they did twitch. It wasn't necessarily a big problem for him; he was closer to the King than I was, so his version of events was more likely to be believed. But appearances also mattered – in multiple respects. Sure, Malfoy could blow me off, head through the Ways, leverage whatever nebulous authority he had, and try to solve the problem himself. Then he could come back, make himself look important to the King, and get one over on me.

Then the White Council would start asking questions like "why you are you being so obvious about the parts of magic we don't want people to know about" and "are you bending the rules for a political benefactor?"

Sure, Malfoy may have been more connected. But even that was bound to be a pain.

That said, if Malfoy did call my half-bluff and tried to beat me to the punch, I would have to counter somehow. Ideally in a more legal and acceptable fashion. Which meant… ugh.

Which meant calling Salazar, because the bastard could probably manage the political aspect of this song-and-dance routine while giving me plausible deniability.

Oh God did I just reason myself into enlisting Salazar's help? Willingly?

…

I think I just did.

Author's Note: I reworked this a few times trying to see if there was a way I could get Harry into the Ways without being an idiot in one way or another. The answer turned out to be no.

Extradimensional jaunts and encounters with faerie ex-godmothers will have to wait for another time. Don't worry though; I'll try to fit in an excuse sometime this chapter. In the meantime, you can amuse yourselves with the Old Spice routine, wizard edition.