A/N: Hey babiesssss! I hope you enjoy this chapter!
GrantedLane
Sunday (10:04)
TheCatGrant: Darling, are you close to finishing up?
stayinyourlane: should be leaving in the next 30 mins. what's up?
TheCatGrant: Carter wants to go to the fair, and he's insisting that we go today. I know it's last minute but…
stayinyourlane: lol babe it's okay that sounds good!
stayinyourlane: you guys eat breakfast and get dressed so when I get home I can just change my clothes and we can head out
TheCatGrant: He also wants you to remember to "pick up the package".
stayinyourlane: lmao copy that
TheCatGrant: Hm, and what exactly is this package?
stayinyourlane: lol, ask Carter
TheCatGrant: He won't tell me. He keeps saying it's a surprise.
stayinyourlane: lol well it is babe so don't think you can get the answer from me
TheCatGrant: But I can, can't I?
stayinyourlane: No.
TheCatGrant: What if I offered sex?
stayinyourlane: we're gonna have sex either way
TheCatGrant: Fair. What about if I let you pick out the next lingerie I buy?
stayinyourlane: tempting but I like being surprised
TheCatGrant: Damn it.
stayinyourlane: You do realize you're attempting to get me to betray our son's trust, right?
TheCatGrant: Well when you put it like that it almost sounds bad.
stayinyourlane: "almost"
TheCatGrant: What if I let you eat snacks in bed one night?
stayinyourlane: …..like forreal?
TheCatGrant: Mhmm.
stayinyourlane: ….on god?
TheCatGrant: On god.
stayinyourlane: …..like seriously tho? Cat don't play with me about this.
TheCatGrant: Seriously. Any snacks you want. Pop Tarts, chips, soda. Even a Nature Valley granola bar.
stayinyourlane: damn you must be desperate
TheCatGrant: It's not desperation. I'm a journalist.
stayinyourlane: i cant even believe i'm considering this
stayinyourlane: i have a duty to Carter
TheCatGrant: I'm your GIRLFRIEND.
stayinyourlane: compelling point
stayinyourlane: I have a counter offer
TheCatGrant: I'm listening.
stayinyourlane: so…I just saw a dog….
TheCatGrant: No.
stayinyourlane: fine then im not telling you
TheCatGrant: We're not getting a dog!
stayinyourlane: then you're not getting any information
TheCatGrant: 5 seconds ago you were absolutely committed to your duty to Carter, and now you're willing to give it up for a dog? Where does your allegiance lie?
stayinyourlane: still with Carter! I know he'll forgive me if I get us a dog
TheCatGrant: I can't believe I'm even considering this…
stayinyourlane: or…you could just wait until I get home to find out
TheCatGrant: That's too long to not know.
stayinyourlane: it's literally like 30 more minutes
TheCatGrant: …Fine.
stayinyourlane: See? That wasn't too hard was it?
TheCatGrant: I hate you.
stayinyourlane: Lies. you love me
TheCatGrant: Yeah yeah. Hurry up and get home.
stayinyourlane: aww you miss me
TheCatGrant: Absolutely not. I just want to know what this package is.
stayinyourlane: Mhmm. I believe you
TheCatGrant: You're insufferable.
stayinyourlane: and ur adorable when you can't get your way
stayinyourlane: and stop pouting
TheCatGrant: I'm not pouting.
stayinyourlane: lol yes you are! Carter told me and sent me a pic
stayinyourlane: lmaoooo
TheCatGrant: What the hell?!
stayinyourlane: lmao it's okay babe you're cute when you pout
TheCatGrant: Insufferable. Both of you. What's the return policy for the two of you?
stayinyourlane: No returns ma'am, sorry. You're stuck with us forever
TheCatGrant: Sigh. Lucky me.
stayinyourlane: lol you love us
TheCatGrant: I do.
TheCatGrant: Now hurry up and get home. I miss you.
TheCatGrant: And I want to know what this package is.
stayinyourlane: Lol omw gorgeous
CEhOes
(11:34am)
TheCatGrant: I fell in love and it was a foolish thing to do.
TheCatGrant: Why didn't you all talk me out of it?
lenaeclipse: I couldn't even talk myself out of it.
DamnSam: Why exactly was falling in love foolish?
TheDailyLane: What did my sister do now?
TheCatGrant: She and Carter bought the three of us t-shirts.
lenaeclipse: Okay? What's wrong with a t-shirt?
TheCatGrant: Matching t-shirts! To wear in PUBLIC!
TheDailyLane: LMAO
DamnSam: asfgkjjdgahjjkg bitchhhhhhh
lenaeclipse: lmfao! What do they say?!
TheCatGrant: I'm here to confide in you all, not to be made fun of.
TheDailyLane: Yeah yeah yeah, just tell us what the shirts say!
TheCatGrant: Sigh.
TheCatGrant: Mine says "I make the rules".
TheCatGrant: Lucy's says "I'm the reason we have rules."
TheCatGrant: And Carter's says, "The rules don't apply to me."
TheCatGrant: Which I'd like to point out that the rules absolutely do apply to him!
DamnSam: lmaooooo! That's cute as fuck though!
TheDailyLane: SEND PICTURES NOW
lenaeclipse: Please!
TheCatGrant: here. j p g
TheDailyLane: AHHHHHHHH lmAO
DamnSam: lmao you're trying so hard not to smile lol ridiculous
lenaeclipse: Okay but it's such a cute picture though! Post it on Instagram!
TheCatGrant: NO!
TheDailyLane: I never thought I'd see the day that Cat Grant would be coerced into wearing corny matching t-shirts lmao!
DamnSam: Wait wait wait
DamnSam: Where are you guys going in those shirts?!
lenaeclipse: ^^^^
TheCatGrant: Sigh….Carter wants to go to the fair
TheDailyLane: asdgkjbsafghjaehfgalfub AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAA
DamnSam: Wait we're taking Ruby to the fair today too!
lenaeclipse: Aw now I wanna go!
TheCatGrant: Please come with us! I can't handle these two by myself. They're already talking about having a cotton candy eating competition.
DamnSam: Sigh…Sue and Ruby want you to tell Lucy and Carter that they "can definitely eat more cotton candy than them!"
lenaeclipse: Kara said, and I'm quoting here, "They're all delusional. I'll show them! You think I got these abs from eating vegetables? No baby, that's cotton candy."
lenaeclipse: I don't know why she's like this
TheDailyLane: The three of you married morons lol
DamnSam: Not married.
lenaeclipse: ^^^ also not married
TheCatGrant: I'd be lying if I said I wasn't thinking about it.
TheDailyLane: Wait what?!
lenaeclipse: Oh shit….
DamnSam: I'm bouta cry….
TheCatGrant: I simply said I'm thinking about it. I didn't say I was doing it any time soon.
TheDailyLane: Yeah, but just the fact that you're even thinking about it is a big deal!
lenaeclipse: ! What happened to "I'm never getting married again. I'm over it."?
TheCatGrant: Yes, well….Lucy is different.
TheDailyLane: Lucy?! MY sister?! The same one that got the dildo stuck on her forehead?! That's the one who made you change your view on marriage?!
lenaeclipse: Lmaoooo! I'm screaming!
DamnSam: Love is powerful lmaooooo
TheCatGrant: Lucy will literally beat all of your asses if I show her this.
DamnSam: yeah but we know you won't because that would mean exposing yourself and your horniness for marriage.
TheDailyLane: HORNINESS FOR MARRIAGE! Asdgkjahgjdjgh
lenaeclipse: Lmao! Cat wants to get down on one knee so bad lol
TheCatGrant: Excuse me, Lena, didn't you buy Kara an engagement ring a few weeks ago?
TheDailyLane: ….. W H A T?!
DamnSam: smh lesbians
lenaeclipse: I did NOT buy her a ring! I was simply looking!
TheCatGrant: "simply looking". Get a backbone and own up to the fact that you were willing to marry Kara after only dating her for three days
DamnSam: Lmaooo!
lenaeclipse: Bold of you to assume I wasn't ready to marry her before we even started dating.
TheDailyLane: That's extremely lesbian
DamnSam: Lena should be the poster child for U-Hauling
lenaeclipse: Samantha, Vasquez is literally already your wife?! You're one to talk!
TheCatGrant: Now that's what I call lesbian.
TheDailyLane: I thought she was American….
DamnSam: Oh shut the fuck up. Are we going to the fair or what?
TheCatGrant: Yes yes yes, we're already on our way. We should be there in the next 30 minutes.
DamnSam: We'll be heading that way as soon as Sue gets here!
lenaeclipse: We probably won't be there until like….two hours from now.
TheDailyLane: ? Are you working on a Sunday, Luthor?
lenaeclipse: Oh please, like you don't?
lenaeclipse: But to answer your question, no, I'm not working.
DamnSam: Then why the hell is it gonna take you two hours to get here?
lenaeclipse: Oh, Kara and I are about to have sex!
lenaeclipse: Bye!
TheCatGrant: Sigh.
DamnSam: Good for her.
TheDailyLane: Lesbians.
Despicable Gorls
Sunday (8:17pm)
DamnSam: CAT LENA, where the hell are you two?!
DamnSam: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU LEFT ME WITH THESE CHILDREN!
YourRouler: wait what's happening?
DamnSam: CAT AND LENA LEFT ME WITH SUE, LUCY, KARA, CARTER, AND RUBY!
bannedfromchilis: Yikes
Shocked&Upset: lol big rip
TheCatGrant: Oh don't be so dramatic.
lenaeclipse: Yeah, we haven't even been gone that long
DamnSam: It's been almost an hour!
whosthatgirl: That's an eternity honestly
NiaSangria: cant believe you guys went to the fair w/o me
NiaSangria: betrayed.
lenaeclipse: Brainy told me that you've been to the fair 15 times this month.
lenaeclipse: You need a time out.
YourRouler: 15 times?! YOU TOLD US YOU'D ONLY BEEN ONCE!
Shocked&Upset: & WE PAID FOR YOU!
NiaSangria: well Brainy is obviously lying.
whosthatgirl: Pam and I went with you last week!
TheCatGrant: Nia's fair escapades are finally being exposed.
NiaSangria: I've only been twice. Once with Vee and Les, and then once with Pam and Jess.
NiaSangria: not that I have to explain myself
TheDailyLane: I'm no mathematician, but that doesn't add up.
YourRouler: ^^^ didn't Brainy take u to the fair for ur first date?
NiaSangria: okay so three times. So what?
lenaeclipse: You've gone with Kara three times as well.
bannedfromchilis: ? The hell?
NiaSangria: it's hard to say no to kara. She begged me. She's the one that's addicted to cotton candy.
Shocked&Upset: how many corndogs have u had this month?
NiaSangria: I don't need to be interrogated for having a good time.
whosthatgirl: I feel used and betrayed.
TheCatGrant: Are we just a way for you to get corndogs? Are we a ploy to you?
NiaSangria: I've only been 6 times this month!
DamnSam: excuse me! Can we ignore Nia's Corndog Heist for a second?!
DamnSam: COME SAVE ME FROM THESE CHILDREN!
TheDailyLane: Oh some on, I doubt Carter and Ruby are that bad together. Maybe they're just hyped up on sugar.
DamnSam: No, Carter and Ruby are great!
DamnSam: SUE, LUCY, AND KARA ON THE OTHER HAND
DamnSam: They're having a competition to see who'll puke on the rollercoaster first
DamnSam: Kara's had 9 pizzas so far!
lenaeclipse: Is she winning though?
DamnSam: LENA I SWEAR
TheCatGrant: Fine fine, we're on our way.
whosthatgirl: How the hell did the three of you end up marrying adult children?
lenaeclipse: Not married yet
TheCatGrant: ^^^
DamnSam: I honestly don't know.
bannedfromchilis: This is what happens when u bring rowdy children together
Sassquez: excuse me I could be offended
donutqueen: I AM offended
stayinyourlane: im not
Sassquez: I won btw
donutqueen: I don't think puking is a win, but whatever
stayinyourlane: lmao kara is salty
donutqueen: Am not
DamnSam: She really is.
donutqueen: And Nia I cant believe u lied on me! YOU'RE the one that has the CORNDOG ADDICTION!
NiaSangria: You bought out that entire cotton candy stand the second time we went!
lenaeclipse: You what?!
donutqueen: Pfft she's obviously lying.
TheDailyLane: I hate to see friends turn on each other. Continue.
yourmagjesty: woah woah woah! You guys went to the fair without us?!
gunscotch: wow. Looks like u guys have all the fun when we leave
gunscotch: hurt.
YourRouler: well well well look what the cat dragged in
TheCatGrant: You know I hate that saying.
donutqueen: AHHHHHHHHHHH! ALEX!
donutqueen: MAGGIE!
donutqueen: Any good news? ALEX?!
lenaeclipse: Yes. Any good news, MAGGIE?!
whosthatgirl: god
gunscotch: actually yeah we have really good news! Hold on
FamilyTree
Sunday (9:20pm)
gunscotch: GUESS WHATTTTTT
yourmagjesty: WE'RE ENGAGED BITCHES!
donutqueen: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
whoyagonnakal: CONGRATULATIONS!
stayinyourlane: !
TheCatGrant: Thank God! The suspense has honestly been killing me.
thethirdolsen: ^^^ I was worried that Maggie wouldn't go through with it!
thethirdolsen: congratz btw
TheDailyLane: Lol, it's adorable that you think Maggie is the one that asked.
bannedfromchilis: Extremely adorable.
whosthatgirl: And naïve.
Shocked&Upset: lol ouch but tru
Barney: Congratulations!
spacedad: I'm extremely happy for the two of you! You'll both make beautiful brides.
YourRouler: gahdamn finally! For a minute there I thought u hoes were gonna wait until u got back to tell us!
yourmagjesty: hold the hell on! U guys knew?!
DamnSam: Pfft of course we knew
gunscotch: KARA WTH
donutqueen: ?! I am appalled!
alwayswinning: who's paul? I thought ur name was Kara?
stayinyourlane: lol classic dad joke
donutqueen: Why would you blame ME, Alex?!
donutqueen: I'm your sister!
gunscotch: WHICH IS EXACTLY WHY I KNOW TO BLAME U
donutqueen: Fake. Could have been Lena.
lenaeclipse: EXCUSE ME?!
donutqueen: Or Cat or Lois. You know they have empires built off of gossip and news. Wouldn't be surprised if they had trouble separating their work life and their personal lives. Sad really.
yourmagjesty: gkhjajgalfga lmaooo
TheCatGrant: Really Kiera?
TheDailyLane: Bold thing to say. Especially when those two women can completely expose your identity.
donutqueen: OR it was probably J'onn. You know he has a problem keeping secrets. Very bad at whispering.
spacedad: That is not true.
NiaSangria: eh.
Sassquez: …ur voice echos
alwayswinning: ^^^ u and clark r terrible whisperers
whoyagonnakal: HEY!
Barney: I would like to confirm that Kara did in fact inform us of your plans.
Barney: And that J'onn is bad at whispering.
DamnSam: ihgfjzsfhijk; lmao
bannedfromchilis: Lol damn Brainy.
donutqueen: Brainy what the hell?!
TheCatGrant: It's what you deserve.
stayinyourlane: ^^^ But on to more important matters which one of u asked first?
lenaeclipse: I think we all know that Maggie asked first, so how about you all just hand over your money to the winning team.
lenaeclipse: Especially you, Kara.
gunscotch: wtf u guys bet on us?!
whoyagonnakal: Oh please, don't act so surprised. You two bet on us all the time!
gunscotch: wanna say that again?
whoyagonnakal: no maam
yourmagjesty: so like…what do u guys get if u win?
whosthatgirl: Well we all bet $100. But in the end the money goes to you guys. So no one really loses.
lenaeclipse: Except for Kara.
donutqueen: Pfft. Please. You talk a big game for a loser. I hope you've stuffed yourself with kale these past few days because you'll never see it again.
gunscotch: Im missing something….
thethirdolsen: Sigh. Both Kara and Lena got too competitive and each bet $1000.
donutqueen: Plus when Lena loses, she'll have to give up kale for the next month.
lenaeclipse: But since Kara has already lost, she has to give up potstickers for the next month.
donutqueen: Lena, stop. You're embarrassing your losing team. Please try to lose with some dignity. We all know Alex asked first.
Shocked&Upset: ^^^ straight facts
alwayswinning: *gay facts actually
TheDailyLane: Alex, can you confirm?
gunscotch: ….well
yourmagjesty: L M A OOOOOOOOOOOO
donutqueen: Alex…?
gunscotch: I'm so sorry Kara.
DamnSam: LMAO
TheCatGrant: I knew Scully didn't have the balls
Sassquez: i am so proud of u Sawyer
yourmagjesty: lmaoooo thx bitch
donutqueen: EVERYBODY SHUT UP!
donutqueen: Alex, please. Tell us you're joking. Tell me this is some sick and twisted prank.
gunscotch: I am so sorry baby sister. I really am.
lenaeclipse: EAT SHIT MOTHERFUCKER! LMAOOOOOO!
DamnSam: kara just stormed away in the most childish way ever lol
lenaeclipse: Ah, baby come back lol
alwayswinning: you can blame all onnnn meeeeee lol
whoyagonnakal: Love that song
yourmagjesty: see how things go bad when we leave town? Smh
gunscotch: sad really
donutqueen: This is YOUR fault Alex!
gunscotch: No ITS NOT! MAGGIE TRICKED ME AND SAID WE WERE JUST GONNA TAKE A WALK BEFORE DINNER!
gunscotch: I WAS GONNA DO IT AT DINNER!
donutqueen: "I wAs gONnA dO iT At dInNEr"
donutqueen: Do u hear yourself?! She's a detective, Alex! SHE DETECTS!
yourmagjesty: proud lol
gunscotch: maybe if u had told me what was going on I would have asked yesterday!
lenaeclipse: Ah ah ah! That was against the rules.
donutqueen: "Rules". Pfft. Nerd.
spacedad: Kara, Lena won fair and square.
donutqueen: Martian Nerd.
whoyagonnakal: I mean, he's not wrong though.
TheDailyLane: Sweetheart, you're not helping
donutqueen: SuperNerd.
thethirdolsen: supergirl bouta be grumpy the next few weeks lol
donutqueen: all due respect...shut the fuck up
YourRouler: touchy touchy lol
lenaeclipse: Aw, Sweetie be nice
donutqueen: You're sleeping on the couch for the next month.
lenaeclipse: Excuse me?
Sassquez: lmao kara is pissed
donutqueen: You heard me. Couch.
yourmagjesty: oooohh lover's quarrel
lenaeclipse: You can't put me on the couch. We don't even live together yet!
bannedfromchilis: Y E T
TheDailyLane: Compelling argument
donutqueen: Doesn't matter. Whenever you sleep over, you'll be sleeping on the couch.
lenaeclipse: Lol, darling, you are such a sore loser. You're attempting to punish me because I'm a winner? Sad really. Nevertheless, I'll be sleeping right next to you, thank you very much.
donutqueen: You are most certainly not welcome. You'll be sleeping on the couch so hard that you'll leave a permanent butt print.
NiaSangria: I'm reading this with a bowl of popcorn and honestly this is a good Sunday night.
alwayswinning: its like watching an intense game of chess.
lenaeclipse: Lmao
lenaeclipse: But darling, if I sleep on the couch, we can't have sex.
stayinyourlane: Lena with a strategic move of rook to knight 3.
donutqueen: There are 24 hours in a day.
gunscotch: Ooooo and Kara surprisingly dodges that with a sly move of bishop to pawn 7
lenaeclipse: Bold of you to assume that all of my 24 hours are for you.
DamnSam: Whew! And there goes Lena coming out of nowhere and overtaking one of Kara's pawns with the daring move of Knight to bishop 1
TheCatGrant: It's extremely clear that none of you know how to play chess.
Shocked&Upset: The crowd is on the edge of their seats as they wait for Kara to recover from that blow.
donutqueen: Oh, so does that mean we won't be having sex in your office anymore? Or at the Deo? Or in the car?
donutqueen: Lotta hours in there...
spacedad: THE DEO?! EXCUSE ME?!
thethirdolsen: not now dad
thethirdolsen: Kara makes a recovery as she moves her rook to pawn 5!
Barney: This is not how chess works. Lena and I play all of the time and this is incredibly wrong.
lenaeclipse: Hmmm, this little conversation is fun but suddenly I think I'm craving potstickers...
donutqueen: YOU DON'T EVEN EAT THEM, KALE GIRL!
lenaeclipse: Hm. Might start though.
donutqueen: You have no idea what I'm going through! I'm living in absolute hell.
Barney: But you haven't even technically started yet.
DamnSam: Brainy with the facts
TheDailyLane: This is extremely over dramatic.
donutqueen: None of you could go what I'm going through right now!
lenaeclipse: Well I don't have to because I won.
donutqueen: Maybe it's best that I lost because there's no way you could handle the nightmare I'm about to endure.
lenaeclipse: Tread carefully.
donutqueen: I'm just saying. It's factual. I'm stronger than you and can endure more than you can. There's no way you could have lasted a month without your green demon juice.
donutqueen: I'm actually glad I lost. I love you too much to see you suffer that way.
TheCatGrant: I-
bannedfromchilis: This just got entirely more interesting.
lenaeclipse: You're attempting to challenge me and I won't bite.
donutqueen: No challenge at all, babe. I'm simply stating the truth.
lenaeclipse: Your "truth" is shit. I could completely last a month without kale! And unlike you, I wouldn't end up crying in the fetal position over it.
donutqueen: Mhmm. Whatever you have to tell yourself, sweetheart.
lenaeclipse: You think you can challenge me and get away with it?
donutqueen: Of course not, my love! It's foolish to challenge someone when you know they won't rise to the occasion.
stayinyourlane: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fkjgbsdfjgajfg;a
TheDailyLane: Oh shit
whosthatgirl: ALRIGHT LETS CALM DOWN HERE
whosthatgirl: KARA STOP PROVOKING HER
whosthatgirl: LENA PLEASE DON'T DO THIS
lenaeclipse: Too late, Jess.
lenaeclipse: Challenge Accepted. One month. No kale.
lenaeclipse: I guarantee I'll come out on top, Miss Danvers.
donutqueen: Hmph. I guess we'll see, Miss Luthor.
alwayswinning: Checkmate.
bannedfromchilis: lotta sexual tension here anyone else pickin up on tht?
Shocked&Upset: yeah I figured it was foreplay
spacedad: Too far.
stayinyourlane: yeah kara came back and they started making out
DamnSam: It was gross. Ruby and Carter may be scarred forever
TheDailyLane: Are they still there or?
Sassquez: nah Kara flew them home. No doubt to have rough competitive sex
yourmagjesty: I feel like this competition can only end with them having sex on a bed of potstickers and kale
gunscotch: gross
Barney: I feel as though that would produce a lot of smells
whoyagonnakal: ^^^
YourRouler: meh id still watch
stayinyourlane: I think we ALL would
gunscotch: ew
spacedad: I think it's past everyone's bedtimes and it's time for us to go to bed.
TheCatGrant: I'm an adult.
TheDailyLane: As am I.
alwayswinning: ? we're ALL adults!
spacedad: Then why must everything revolve around sex with you people?!
Sassquez: ….bc we're adults?
whosthatgirl: ^^^ Points were made.
spacedad: sigh.
thethirdolsen: this has been quite the show.
thethirdolsen: Love that for me.
A/N: Honestly, poor Jess. She's gonna have to deal with Lena firsthand, but at least Maggie and Alex are finally engaged!
Buckle up because Lena and Kara are about to raise hell.
Tumblr: alotofunsteady