On a Sunday afternoon a few days later, Elsa, Anna, and Ingrid returned from the memorial service for Olaf. It had been small, quiet, and dignified, as Elsa had wanted. There had been some discreet discussion in the higher reaches of the Lutheran Church Of Arendelle of whether or not Olaf could be considered related to Elsa and therefore deserved a royal funeral, or if in fact he was a person and entitled to a funeral at all. In the end the service had been performed by the head of the church himself, over a tiny casket holding the twigs and lumps of coal that were all that remained.
"You had quite the chat with Archbishop Næss," Anna said to Ingrid, once the three of them were in the privacy of Elsa's rooms. "Do you know him?"
"Yes," said Ingrid.
After waiting for her to elaborate, Anna prompted, "How did you meet?"
"I was troubled. Elsa sent me to him."
"Nothing serious, I hope."
Ingrid took Elsa's and Anna's jackets, folding Anna's neatly and putting Elsa's away. "I was upset about killing Prince Hans. Pastor Næss was very kind."
Anna opened her mouth, thought better of asking, and closed it again.
"He's Archbishop Næss," said Elsa over her shoulder as she took off her black bonnet and set it aside.
"Yes," said Ingrid. "He likes me to call him Pastor. He misses doing pastor things." Ingrid tidied as Elsa and Anna sat down. "I liked what he said about why he decided to do the ceremony."
" 'I believe that not only was Olaf a person, but he was the only truly innocent person I've met outside of a baptism'," Elsa filled in, then sighed. "It's true."
Ingrid joined them around the low table, Elsa on the divan, Anna and Ingrid in wooden chairs with embroidered cushions.
Elsa folded her hands in her lap. "I need to talk to you. Both of you. About…" She waved a hand at the three of them. "Us."
"You mean, us us," said Anna, as Ingrid nodded.
"Yes." Elsa's shoulders sagged. "I don't know what to do. I love you both." She turned to Anna. "I love you like a flower loves the sun. You are my light, my warmth, my passion. You are a part of me; in some ways the best part. I love you, admire you, I'm so proud of you. Anna, you are more precious to me than I can say."
"Gosh, wow," said Anna, but before she could reply Elsa had turned to face Ingrid.
"Ingrid, I love you like a flower loves the rain. You comfort me, you sustain me. I love seeing how much you've grown while I've known you, and I believe you've helped me grow, too. You are sweet and gentle and kind, and I can't imagine life without you."
"Thank you," said Ingrid, lowering her head and smiling up at Elsa.
"And I can't love you both. It's wrong. I feel like...worse than a failure, worse than a sinner. I am a terrible person. I feel like I am betraying you both every minute I let this go on."
"No, Elsa, it's not like that. You're not like that!" said Anna, reaching out to touch her hand.
"Elsa," said Ingrid, sitting up straight. "You must not feel bad about love. To love your sister as you do is considered wrong. To love another woman as you do is considered wrong. To be in love with more than one other person the way you are is considered wrong. But all I see is love. Maybe I'm wrong. But it doesn't feel wrong. You are a good person. Please forgive yourself." She sat back in her chair. "That was terribly forward of me." Then, not quite as loud, "But I'm not sorry."
Elsa smiled at this declaration of faith, and at Ingrid's courage.
"She, um, kind of has a point," said Anna. "I mean, I can think of two princes and a baron off the top of my head who have a wife and a...nother person, and it'd be a scandal if anyone talked about it but the world hasn't come to an end. Yet. I guess."
Elsa shook her head. "They're men. Men are like that."
"Yeah, but they don't feel guilty. So you shouldn't," said Anna. "In fact, you're better than them, because you care so much about us. You're not like, 'Ha ha, I am a powerful man and I will take a mistress because no one can stop me'," saying the last part in a comically low voice. "So, you know, you're not a bad person."
Elsa smiled behind her hand. "You're very sweet. And silly." Her smile faded. "But would you really be all right with that?"
"Wait, what?" Anna's brow furrowed. "You mean, you thought I was suggesting that?"
"Oh," said Elsa.
"I mean, I guess it would solve some problems. But it'd be weird. Really weird. But… I don't know. Is that… something you'd want?"
"No! That is, it would be wrong of me. It wouldn't be fair to you. To either of you. At least one of you should have a real relationship." Elsa stared down at the frost lines she was doodling on the tabletop, then wiped them away.
"It's not like there could be a 'real' relationship anyway. Not a normal one. 'Cause of…" Anna waved her hand at the three of them. "You know." She paused. "Wait, am I trying to talk myself into a… I don't know what you'd call it. A ménage à trois ?" She didn't notice Ingrid frowning at the unfamiliar foreign phrase. "I mean, how would it work? I mean, the three of us… your bed…" Anna grimaced, then turned to Ingrid. "No offense."
"None taken," said Ingrid.
"Would we trade off? You're with me Mondays, Wednesday, and Fridays, and with Ingrid Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays?" Anna grinned nervously, her shoulders tense.
"And Sunday I pray for forgiveness," said Elsa, her mouth smiling, her eyes wincing.
"Okay, not like that. But I suppose, you know, we could try something? Try to find a way? That doesn't feel like cheating. That makes you happy. And, you know, makes me and Ingrid happy. I guess, I mean I'm saying that if it's wrong it's not that wrong, and not compared to other stuff that's, you know, supposed to be wrong. Like Ingrid said," said Anna.
They sat in silence for a long moment.
Ingrid made a short, sharp exhalation. "No," she said, not meeting Elsa's eyes or Anna's.
Elsa leaned in towards Ingrid. "You wouldn't be all right with this kind of...arrangement?" She was surprised that, after all this time, Ingrid would be the jealous one.
"No. Yes. No. That is…" Ingrid turned her head from side to side, still decidedly not looking at Elsa or Anna. "It won't be that way." She finally came to rest, shoulders hunched, staring at her hands folded in her lap. "I would be 'all right' with the arrangement. Very much. You know I love it when Anna makes you happy. And I love to be with you, however much or little. It is a gift. To have even a fraction of your love would make me more fortunate than anyone." She glanced at Anna. "Almost anyone. But it can't be."
Elsa came to her side. "What do you mean?"
"Anna loves you, and means well. But I love you in a way that makes me happy even if someone else makes you happy. Her love needs you. To see me make you happy would hurt her. Then you would be hurt, and so would I." Her shoulders rose and fell as she sighed deeply. "You can't be with me. It's not what will happen. It can't."
Anna was torn between wanting to comfort Ingrid and taking offense. "Hey, I love my sister. And I do so want her to be happy. And I could...for her…be..."
Suddenly Ingrid was kissing Elsa. Passionately, almost violently. She stood, taking Elsa with her, holding her close. With one hand Ingrid gripped Elsa's head, almost forcing her into the kiss, the other hand pressing against the small of Elsa's back and then sliding down to her buttocks, holding them together, Ingrid's hips slowly rotating against Elsa's. Elsa had been too startled to resist at first, but was drawn in by Ingrid's hungry passion unleashed. Elsa moaned as she instinctually reciprocated, slipping her fingers into Ingrid's hair, grabbing her around the waist, partly from lust and partly to support herself as her legs weakened. Elsa moaned again, startled by the suddenness, unprepared, overwhelmed by sensation and by the force of how much Ingrid craved her.
A moment later Ingrid broke them apart, her arm still around Elsa's waist to steady her. She looked boldly at Anna, and Elsa followed her gaze. They both saw the expression on Anna's face. Shock. Hurt. Jealousy. Betrayal.
Pain.
Ingrid quickly pulled her hand away and clasped them behind her back. "I'm sorry." She made a jerky step towards the door and stopped. "I shouldn't have… I had to…" Absurdly, she made a hurried, jolting curtsy. "If I may be excused I… I have to go." She bolted for the door. Elsa and Anna watched her go, both disoriented for their own reasons.
Anna looked up at Elsa. She tilted her head apologetically. "She's not wrong." Shrug. "I mean, I want you to be happy and I don't want you to feel bad, but I feel what I feel. I can't help it. I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry," muttered Elsa, half to herself. "Everyone's sorry." She closed her eyes tightly for a second. "I wish it could be different. But it's not. And we have to deal." She opened her eyes again, looking directly into Anna's. "I'm sorry too. And I love you. But I have to go find her."
"I understand," said Anna, and it was mostly true.
