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The Lucky Ones

Chapter 32

Into the Sunset

Friday, July 1, 2011

Anastasia

I'm so very proud of Christian.

He's cool and poised during the taping with Bandi. After introducing me as his bride, and some chit-chat about our honeymoon to Hawaii, he announces the new charitable trust, "The Grey Family Foundation." Coping Together has been rebranded and now falls under a larger umbrella, along with new missions for the homeless, as well as assistance for abused children.

We've been well-prepped for this interview. We also had a family meeting, so everyone would know what was coming. It was decided that the entire family would attend the taping. Dad, the Kavanaghs, and all the Greys are here to support us.

A couple of days ago, we received word that Leila passed away. She had been in a persistent vegetative state since the break-in, so her death wasn't a surprise, but the news drove home Christian's need to deal with the subs. The idea is to reveal just enough of the truth that no one can ever accuse him of hiding some sort of sordid past.

It helps that Bandi is a sympathetic interviewer. Of course, she made sure to disclose that we are all socially acquainted, and that I'm an employee of Kavanagh Media.

While my man exudes confidence, it takes a couple of minutes for my butterflies to go away.

"Why these changes?" Bandi asks. "You already contribute a great deal toward the assistance of Seattle families. What moved you to create your own charities? Are existing programs not enough?"

"Many hands make light work, so a multi-pronged approach is always best. For me, this is personal. My birth mother struggled with basics like food and housing. She died from drug use. While I was under her care, I was neglected and abused. I was fortunate to be adopted by Grace and Carrick Grey, who have given me a wonderful life. Unfortunately, I was abused again as a young teen. My abuser was a neighbor who ingratiated herself to my parents. I want to do whatever I can to prevent other children from being subjected to the heinous acts I endured."

"How was this female neighbor able to get to you?" Bandi's is soft-spoken and gentle in her approach.

"Self-esteem issues lingered from the earlier abuse, which made it easier for this neighbor to manipulate me and take advantage. She sexually tortured me, and labeled it BDSM. There's nothing wrong with kink if it's safe, sane, and consensual, but what she did to me was none of those things."

"How has this abuse impacted your relationships?" Bandi looks back and forth between us. "Your wife is the first woman anyone has ever seen you with. Did the sexual abuse preclude you from dating?"

"Until meeting Ana I had never dated anyone. That doesn't mean I was without female companionship. I had arrangements with women for the purposes of casual sex, since that was the only type of relationship I thought was possible. My abuser had so thoroughly brainwashed me, that I never thought love was a possibility for me."

Christian smiles at me, the sweetness and love evident in his gaze.

"How did you meet these women? You're not the type to go clubbing." Bandi is asking questions that every tabloid reader wants to know.

"An acquaintance made introductions," Christian says with a shrug. "The women weren't girlfriends in any sense of the word. There wasn't any meaningful conversation. I was polite, cordial, as were they. It was only sex."

"Other than sex, what was in it for them? You didn't take them out, or even speak to them much." This line of questioning will definitely make into the news.

"I can't answer for them, but I treated them kindly, rewarded them with gifts, and they always seemed to appreciate that. These relationships felt mutually beneficial."

This has been Christian's subtle jab at the so-called 'Sub Club.' He's telling his version of events as a pre-emptive strike, designed to prevent blackmail or publicity seeking.

"What changed for you? What made you seek a more traditional kind of relationship?" When Bandi gets to this question, I know we're in the home stretch.

"Two things: therapy and Ana." Christian smiles broadly. "Through therapy I realized I am neither Dominant nor submissive. I learned that a structured form of kink, while it may be right for some people, isn't something that serves me. Ana was the catalyst for me to deal with my childhood traumas."

Christian winks at me, and I feel my cheeks heat.

"What does the future look like for you two? Ana?" Bandi catches me by surprise.

Christian led me to believe my role was simply to give him something to hold, a security blanket of sorts, during the interview.

Stay close, my beautiful talisman, he had said.

I swallow, take a deep breath, and turn to my husband. He gives me an almost imperceptible nod, encouraging me.

"We're in the process of remodeling the home we recently purchased in Bellevue," I answer. "It's near Christian's parents. Family is of utmost importance to us, and we want to stay close."

"Yes, community and family are at the heart of what we hold dear," Christian adds. "That's why we're planning a large family." He's so proud of all the children we don't yet have, and I love him for it.

At the close of the interview, we're met with hugs from those we love best.

Dad plants a kiss to my temple.

"It went well. Both of you kept your composure. And Christian never let go of your hand. Everyone noticed that. Your happiness was on display for all to see."

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Christian

"Honey, I'm home," I call out from the foyer, enjoying the words. This new found domesticity feels cozy, warm, comfortable.

"In the kitchen," my wife replies. As I round the corner to find her, she bounds into my arms. "I'm so glad you're home."

"Such a patient wife, putting up with me leaving you alone on a Saturday morning. But I promise you'll never become a golf widow." I run my hands through her hair, trying to brush away some errant flour. "You've been baking again."

"Pizza dough. Lunch should be ready within the hour. Is he going to sell?"

"The deal was sealed, but my golf game sucks. I blame you for that. I couldn't stop thinking about you. Miss me?" With an arm across her shoulder, I walk her to the breakfast bar.

"Silly man. Of course, I did." She uses the collar of my golf shirt to pull my face to hers, and stands on tiptoes to kiss me. "Let's try for an eight o'clock bedtime. I'm feeling very needy."

"We aim to please, Mrs. Grey." This time I initiate the kiss, pulling her close and backing her up against the fridge.

A clatter startles us and we turn to find Gail on hands and knees retrieving groceries, which have spilled from one of her large mesh shopping bags.

"Excuse me," she mumbles. Her face is flushed, either from exertion, or from embarrassment at finding her employers making out. I bend to help her and order is soon restored.

"This arugula is perfect for our salad. Thank you," Ana says, looking over Gail's purchases.

"You're welcome. I see you've completed all the prep for your pizza. How about I finish up, so you two can spend some time together?" I appreciate Gail helping me carve out some alone time with my wife.

"That would be wonderful. Thank you." Ana reaches for my hand, and leads me into the great room.

There's a small heap of travel guides on one of the sofas. The idea that she may want to travel makes my heart soar. I pick up "Lonely Planet 2011: Thailand's Beaches."

"When I was in the library this morning, I found myself in the nine-hundreds," she offers as explanation.

Of course my little book nerd has the Dewey Decimal system committed to memory.

"And what did you discover there?"

"Walking past all the guides made me realize I'd like to travel a bit before the baby comes. That is, if you can get away. I know it can be difficult. It certainly puts a lot on Ros' shoulders."

"I think Ros secretly likes it when I'm gone. She gets to have things her way, so I don't think she'd mind. Where do you want to go?" I sit down and sift through the small pile. I see guides to Thailand, Vietnam, and Indonesia. "Asia?"

"I thought it might be fun to explore the Pacific rim. Bali sounds lovely, but then again, look at these photos of Chiang Mai."

She's marked the pages with post-its, and there's a notebook where she's begun making lists. She hands me a book, then begins flipping through another. Her interest and enthusiasm are adorable. She stops for a moment, her face serious. "But if we only have time for short trips, we could visit Alaska, California, or begin exploring Canada."

"I never fully appreciated travel until I met you. Wherever your heart desires, we'll go."

"You're no help," she says in good humor. "Of all the places you've been, which is your favorite?"

"Any of the places I've been with you." It's an easy question to answer.

"Sweet of you to say so. But again, you're not being helpful." She flops down into a large leather chair.

"Baby, in our lifetime we're going to go everywhere. We're going to do all the things. It's just a matter of deciding where to start. How about you make a list of your top five, write each one down on a slip of paper, and we'll draw from a bowl?"

"Actually...that's a great idea. You're brilliant."

"Of course I am. I married you. Get your sexy ass over here," I order.

"You are such a smooth talker," she says, climbing onto my lap and snuggling against my chest. "Oh, I almost forgot. Welch came by with an envelope. He said it's something you're expecting. I dropped it in your study."

"There's something I need to talk to you about." I need to share Welch's report with her, and I hope it brings her some peace.

"You're scaring me a bit," she says, twisting her rings. "But go ahead with it. Rip it off like a band-aid."

I hate seeing Ana stressed. In the short time we've known one another, it's been one problem after another, so I suppose it's natural to brace herself in anticipation of bad news.

"On the day we met, when we had our first private conversation, you expressed concern over your father's state of mind when you were born. You were worried that it might have contributed to his death. Baby, that's been bothering me. I had Welch do some digging. He was able to obtain the accident report. There were five soldiers involved in the accident, two fatalities and three left with permanent injuries."

Ana sits up straight, her torso stiff and rigid. Her mouth falls open in surprise.

"I had no idea. Mom never told me much about the accident and I was always too afraid to ask."

"Why would you be afraid to ask? It's only natural for a kid to have questions. You've a right to know all the circumstances of your father's death."

"My mother was very skilled at turning things around and making them my fault. I think that's how I somehow got the idea that my dad was disappointed by my arrival and maybe it distracted him, causing the accident."

I've never met my mother-in-law, but I hate her for not nurturing and loving her daughter.

I pull Ana back down against my chest, and stroke her arms and back. She melts into me. It's powerful, knowing I can soothe her.

"You can read the report at your leisure, but here's the bottom line. Your dad was thrilled over your arrival."

"How can you possibly know that?" I hear a quick exhale, and then a heavy sigh.

I kiss the top of her head. Her face is buried in my shirt, and I hear sniffling.

Oh, baby, don't cry.

"Welch contacted the survivors, and also spoke to Lambert's best friends. When your father returned to duty after leaving the hospital, he couldn't stop gushing about how cute you were, how perfect, how you curled your fingers around his thumb, not wanting to let go. He couldn't wait to get back to the hospital to hold you again. They overheard him on the phone with his mother, telling her about you. And there's more. Your birth father was well-liked. He was a good person. Everyone spoke highly of him."

I won't tell her the comments about Carla. Ana will see them if she reads the report. One guy even referred to her by way of the c-word.

"If only," Ana chokes back a sob, "I could have known him."

"I know." I pull her tighter and rock her from side to side. "The accident was just that. It was an accident, beyond the control of any of the men on site."

"Tell me," she whispers.

"It was live-fire training. The guys were moving fast and their hands were tired from ramming round after round into the howitzer. But that's not what caused the accident. The crew had gotten a bad batch of propellent, so the charge that killed your birth father didn't fire when it should have. It stayed inside the cannon and exploded when the crew opened the breach to reload. It wasn't fatigue, distraction, or high emotions that caused his death. He was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time."

Ana weeps, letting loose years of pent-up tears.

I hold her.

"Thank you," she says, eventually composing herself. She looks exhausted. "Thank you for knowing what I need. I didn't fully understand how important it was for me to know my beginnings."

"There's a bit more. Welch located your closest living Lambert relatives. Your grandparents died recently, but you have an uncle and some cousins in Arizona. We can visit them if you like."

She stares at the ceiling for a moment, then faces me.

"I don't want to pursue that. As far as I'm concerned, it's a closed door. They knew about me, yet they never tried to get in touch." Ana shakes her head.

"Maybe they tried to make contact, and your mother kept it from you." I'm attempting to cover all the bases here, not stir up more shit.

"Strange...but I feel no connection with the Lamberts. And if I had a grandchild, wild horses couldn't keep me away. Even my mother's nasty temper wouldn't be a deterrence. If they'd wanted to know me, they'd have found a way." Ana rubs her eyes, and blinks as if everything is suddenly clear. "The only reason I might contact them is for a family medical history, but I'm not interested in any kind of relationship. I have all the family I need right here. I have you, Dad, my Kavanaghs, and now I have Greys."

XXXXXXX

After lunch, Ana and I decided on a nap. Our naps are as much love-making as sleep, but they are always restorative.

We both awaken feeling energetic. After a bit of discussion, we decide to take the R8 for a drive out to our home site in Bellevue. It's a beautiful summer afternoon in Seattle, one of those rare days when the sky is a clear, bright azure.

Taylor follows. He's going to check up on the camera system that has been installed around our new property.

Cash does indeed talk, and the sale of the old Lincoln place has gone through. The razing of the house will soon be complete, an event I look forward to. Combined the three lots give us eleven acres of lakefront. There will be housing for Gail and Taylor, along with all the other CPOs. Ana and I also have plans to build a guest cottage for Ray.

I'm more than eager to get Elena's former home cleared away. It seems I'm not the only one creeped out by that house. Elliot called yesterday to say he's arranged for some sort of house blessing by my parents' priest. Three of his workers claim to have seen some sort of specter around the property.

Before the building comes down, my brother wants to expel any unwanted visitors. To me it sounds more exorcism than blessing. I don't believe in specters, goblins, or bogeymen, but if it makes my brother feel better, he has my permission to proceed.

El originally wanted to hire a Wiccan practitioner to cast some sort of spell, but our Episcopalian mother got wind of the plan and expressed strong disapproval, telling him there had been enough bedevilment on the property, and Jesus was the only answer.

We pull two large totes from the car. They are stuffed to the brim with Pendleton pillows and blankets.

"These are beautiful," Ana says, running fingers along a woollen edge. "They remind me of our time in Montana."

"My mother purchased them for me when I moved to Escala. She reasoned that I'd need them for sitting out on my balcony on chilly days. Until today they've languished in the back of a closet, unused."

"I'll be sure to let Grace know how much we're enjoying them," Ana says.

We decide to walk through the house before settling on the dock to watch the sunset.

"This yellow gingham wallpaper is beginning to grow on me," Ana says, as she surveys the kitchen. "It's dingy and worn, but maybe we can find something similar to replace it."

"If that's what you want." I hate the idea of those checks, but if that's what my girl wants, she shall have it.

"You don't care for it." Ana giggles. "We both have to agree, so no yellow gingham."

"Thank fuck," I say, not bothering to hide my relief. "I'd prefer neutrals."

"That sounds wonderful. I have to return to work next week, but the decorator said she'd accommodate me, meeting me at the studio whenever necessary." Ana taps on the counter and studies the old brown tile backsplash.

"How do you feel about going back to work?" I'd prefer she work for me, or stay home, but I want her happy.

"I'm excited to be part of the launch. I like Bandi and the rest of the team. I'm not supposed to talk about the new show, but since you're so good at keeping secrets, I'm going to risk it all." She leans across the kitchen island, a conspiratorial twinkle in her eyes. "Shhh. Don't tell anyone...but Kate, Mia, and I will be producing and hosting lifestyle segments."

"You'll be on air?" This is big news.

"Yes. Bandi says I'll quickly get over any trepidation. We'll discuss food, wine, fashion, family, travel, art, books, all kinds of things. And I want to produce some segments on child-rearing issues. I already have a notebook full of ideas."

I walk around the island to scoop my wife up in a congratulatory hug.

"Baby, I'm so proud of you." She grins at hearing my praise.

"You haven't heard the best part." She's beaming, and bursting to share her news. "Papa K hasn't signed off on it yet, but Bandi says we can schedule multiple tapings in such a way that I'll only have to go in a couple of days a week. If it works out, I'll be able to spend lots of time at home with the baby."

"Now that is good news. Was that your idea or Bandi's?"

"Well," she says, her lashes aflutter, "I might have made some noises about resigning when the baby comes. I've told everyone who will listen that we won't have our child spend the majority of his or her waking hours with a sitter or nanny. The nice thing about money is that it affords us better choices."

"Hallelujah, baby. You're finally embracing my filthy lucre. You've no idea how happy that makes me."

"You're ridiculous," she says, rubbing her nose against mine. "And I love you for it."

"Let's go watch the sunset," I say, taking her hand. Each of us carries a tote with pillows and blankets.

As we stroll to the dock, Ana nods over toward some rose hedges. There are some old brick pavers nearby.

"With some weeding and pruning, that area is going to be gorgeous. Just imagine," she says, squeezing my hand, and stopping to reflect. "This time next year we'll be all moved in and a family of three."

"Is it happening too fast?" I sometimes worry that she might feel overwhelmed by the rapidity of our union.

"It is fast, but it's a wonderful rollercoaster, and I wouldn't change a thing." My wife is nothing if not reassuring. "You know, this place has good energy. We're going to be very happy here."

XXXXXXX

"That was easier than I thought," Ana says, wearing a grin of satisfaction. "Theodore Steele Grey if it's a boy and Margaret Rose Grey for a girl."

"I like the idea of using traditional family names, so it's not like you had to twist my arm. It's a way to honor those who came before us and those who are making the journey with us." I'm proud that our first child will be named after one of my grandparents and carry middle names from Ana's side.

"I don't think I've ever felt more content or relaxed than I do in this moment," she says, punctuating her words with a firm kiss to my mouth.

Her lips release mine, but I quickly reclaim her with a long, soft, deep kiss. I'd like to take her here and now, but then I remember those new security cameras set up around the property. No one sees what's mine.

As the sun slowly drops, Ana relaxes in my embrace. We're propped up on pillows, cocooned in wool blankets. It's sixty degrees, but with a stiff northwest breeze, it feels cooler.

"This sunset is perfect, as if created just for us." Ana releases a long sigh, running a hand up and down my chest. It's both soothing and arousing. "Let's pretend this sunset is ours, and ours alone."

As I look down at Ana and out across the lake, I feel a deep sense of gratitude.

"All the sunsets belong to us," I tell her. "You know a sunset is a bit like our union, a blazing meld of your light, airy spirit and my dark, brooding heart."

"That's beautiful, downright poetic. I'm impressed, Mr. Grey." I'm rewarded with a kiss. "But your heart doesn't seem dark or brooding anymore."

"I still have my moments," I chuckle.

"Keeps me on my toes," she giggles. "And I wouldn't have you any other way."

The End

December 2019

North Carolina, USA

Gentle Reader,

This is the final chapter of the story.

I've been asked about an epilogue. That's definitely something I may write in the future, but for now the story is marked complete. I already feel as if I've provided an epilogue of sorts with the A to Z collection, but I will consider providing you with a bit more story, as I know some are eager to know exactly how many children Ana and Christian added to their family.

In the new year, I will search my files for more additions to A-Z, as well as make edits to both TLO and A-Z. If you spot any errors, please PM me. I am most grateful for constructive criticism. My intention is to leave the stories up for the long term, and I want to leave behind quality products. Pulling to publish has never been part of my plan.

Some readers have asked if I'll continue to write fanfiction. The answer is yes. I must complete "Swap Meet," and I also have other WIPs sitting on my desktop. (Confession: I'm a woman with ADD and a wandering eye for plot bunnies.)

This was my first effort at fanfiction. When I began writing this story, I had no idea the turns my life would take. If I had known it would take three years to finish the story, I never would have started. But begin I did, and here we are.

I've learned many valuable lessons from my fanfiction experience. My promise to you, gentle reader, is this: I will never again begin publishing a story unless it is prewritten, and in need of nothing more than edits.

When I begin posting chapters of "Swap Meet," you can be assured I will update on a regular schedule. The teaser posted contains excerpts from chapters 3 and 4 of the story, but I've only drafted 40K words thus far, about a third of the story. It will be a while before I upload more.

This community/fandom brings much joy to my life and I cherish the friendships I've made. Thank you for being part of my life, for reading, for the faves/follows. And for those who take the time to leave a review, thanks for the payday. Your reviews are the only payment I'll ever receive for writing, and I appreciate you more than you can ever know.

All the best, Paula x