Chapter 44.
On arrival at the garage with Sam and Maggie, Cas saw Dean hauling stuff from the back seat while Jack got things out of the trunk and Sarah paced the length of the garage, nodding and smiling.
Cas went over to her. "Hello, Sarah." he said.
She hugged him. "How are you, Castiel?" she said.
He looked across at Dean, who was arranging a pile of gingham cloth in the corner. "Can we be somewhere that isn't here?" he whispered.
Sarah followed the direction of his gaze. "Show me your secret bunker." she said. She called across to Dean and said, "I'm seizing the opportunity to snoop around, if you're sure you don't need my help."
"You're the brains, we're the grunts." said Dean, "And we fully understand your instructions. Snoop away."
Cas led her from the garage.
"Is it that bad?" she asked.
"No. Sorry. I had no intention of alarming you." he said, "I just needed to ask if Dean has said anything to you."
"My home is nearly thirty minutes away. It would be odd if he said nothing."
"He can say nothing for hundreds of miles when he wants to." said Cas.
"If you two have quarreled, the day before the party, I am going to be deeply disappointed." she said.
"Twice, when I have been putting him to sleep, he has been afraid." said Cas.
"He hates it. You know that."
"No, not hating it, not uneasy, afraid as if he is about to die. Actually, when he is about to die, he exhibits less fear."
"You know what I am going to say."
"I tried asking him. He promised to talk about it later."
"It's later. Ask him again."
"Later means never to a Winchester." he said.
She looked around as they approached the map table. "Oh, this is very B movie."
"Yes. Dean is very proud of it." he said. He gestured to Bobby, who had stood up quickly, "Sarah, this is Bobby Singer, who was a one-man army in Apocalypse World."
She smiled at him, "It's a privilege to meet you, sir."
"Likewise." said Bobby, "Everyone is excited about the party. It's a great idea."
"I hope you dance." she said.
"We all dance." he said, "Entertainment was limited where we come from."
"Is anyone in the kitchen?" Cas asked Bobby.
"I don't think so." said Bobby.
Cas led the way, happy to see her eyes widen at every new sight. He was glad that the bunker impressed her.
When they got to the kitchen, he said, "I will introduce you to the others. I just wanted a few minutes to talk alone."
"I understand." she said, "Dean told me the talismans worked. I known that's not wholly good news for you."
"As I told you, I can be happy about it. I can be happy that he is happy and that things are normal again. I can focus on the positives."
"But your heart is broken." she said.
He smiled, trying to seem reassuring. "Cracked a little, perhaps. I may need to spend more time with the bees for a while and more time with you and time away from this place and everyone in it."
"Especially Dean?"
"I don't know." he said, "It depends on how well I can fake enthusiasm. If he doubts me, I will need to get away."
"You seem afraid." she said, "You seem terrified. Is it possible that Dean is feeling the same fear? Maybe he's afraid of the same things."
"Please try to find out. I don't mean to report back to me. I don't need to know." She looked doubtful. He revised his statement. "My need to know is emotional, not actual. All that matters is that someone is able to help him."
"I know there's a lot on his mind. I'll see what I can do. As for the rest, you know you can come to the farm any time you like."
Mary came in. She immediately saw Sarah and offered a handshake. "You must be Sarah. I'm Mary Winchester."
Sarah shook her hand. "It's lovely to meet you. Dear Castiel is going to show me his room and then I should come back here and get to know you properly."
"I'd like that." said Mary, "I'll make some coffee."
Cas led Sarah to his room. He opened the door and she went in and looked at his simple furnishings. "I know it doesn't look right." he said.
"If you like it, it's fine." she said.
"I like it. It feels like home." he said, following her in.
"It is your home. Your family are around you here. That won't change."
"Everything changes, if you live long enough." he said. He closed the door. "I asked Jules to dance with me at the party."
"Jules the genius?"
"Yes."
"I hope she said yes."
"She did. We're good friends now. I thought she and Dean were attracted to each other, but it seems I was mistaken. Dean thinks she may be attracted to me."
"Does that trouble you?" she said.
"I never expected it." he said.
"Try not to worry about it." she said, "A dance is just a dance. It's not a proposal of marriage. If your relationship develops, that's good, but if it doesn't, you'll still have a good friend."
"Relationships between angels and humans are complicated."
"All relationships are complicated, especially if you use your head when your heart knows the way to go."
"What if your heart is an idiot?" he said.
She smiled. "Your heart was wise enough to choose Dean Winchester as a friend."