[a/n0]I must admit the notion of a House-Elf help desk tickled greatly

Harry Does Different CCLXXXIV

Dark Luna's Advice

"I'm glad you're alright Luna." Harry gave the Ravenclaw's shoulder a gentle squeeze "And I thank you for following me. Any one of you could have died tonight. Like Sirius. How can I keep this from happening again?"

She looks sinister, not her usual rather spacy self "Fewest possible murders?"

"Huh? Whah?" Harry ejaculated, his jaw about bounced off the floor.

Luna looked around the Hospital Wing shiftily and lowered her voice to a bare whisper "There is a saying, Harry Potter. Sounds like something Mrs. Weasley might say while making breakfast You can't make an omlette without breaking a few eggs."

"You're serious?" he gaped at the girl.

She took his hand, pressed it on her cheek "While I have hair as long as his, I doubt your Godfather would do this. Be that as it may, we are at war, I will no longer throw tickle jinxes in response to Killing Curses."

"And what if they have a wrackspurt infection?" asked Harry.

She replied with a stony glare and "I believe Professor Dumbledore wants to give you one of his chats. Please stay with him until something happens."

"Why? What's going to happen?" he wanted to know.

Abcij

Severus Snape stormed up the Gryffindor Tower and practically exploded into the Fifth Year boys' room roaring "POTTTTTTTTTTTER!"

"Something troubling you, Severus?" asked Dumbledore mildly.

The Potion Professor pulled in his horns, at least momentarily, and almost smiled "Ahh excellent, Headmaster, already here. I trust you've expelled the brat and snapped his wand. May I have the pleasure of throwing him out? May I break a bone or two?"

"What're you on about, git?" demanded Harry, at the moment uncaring of usual school rules.

The Headmaster got between student and teacher "What, precisely, has happened, Severus?"

"Draco Malfoy has been found in his bed." The Head of Slytherin snarled "In two pieces. He was LITERALLY torn in half. When I saw you here I assumed you were dealing with the murderer."

Harry's mind flashed to his conversation with Luna, he covered with a stock smartass remark "You know what happens, don't you? When you assume? Makes an ASS of U and ME!"

"Silence Potter!" Snape snapped, drawing his wand.

The Headmaster acted well before Harry could "Expelliarmus! Harry, hold. Has Poppy determined when poor Draco died?"

"I fail to -" the Potion Master began in anger, then noted the Headmaster's expression and answered "in under two hours."

Dumbledore levitated the wand to its owner "Then, Professor Snape, I believe your suspicion of Harry is without foundation. I have been with him discussing events of last evening for at least that long."

"I think I'm owed an apology…Snivilus." Said Harry with a smirk.

Losing his patience and radiating a burst of magic, Dumbledore roared "ENOUGH! Severus, go! I will be along presently. And Harry, were school still in session, THAT would be a lengthy detention."

"Isn't a dead Godfather enough for one day, sir?" Harry sneered "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to finish packing."

Aabcij

Harry approached Luna in The Great Hall and squeezed her hand "Some tragedy, huh?"

"Quite." She replied with her traditional airiness "I understand your snowy is most loyal and punctual. I have a few ideas for the summer."

He nodded "Join us for the Express ride?"

"Thank you Harry Potter, that would be lovely."

Those around the pair were a little shocked by the seeming sudden friendship between The-Boy-Who-Lived and the Ravenclaw weirdo.