a/n Happy December everyone! Tonight is the first snowing night! Are you excited about Christmas?
I hope you like chapter34! A big thanks to all of you for your favourites, follows and reviews, it means the world to me.
Always laugh, smile, love.
Take care, Γ
The Unity of Opposites
Chapter Thirty Four
Obligations
No one was there. The clock's ticking echoed in the whole room. Lines of light were storming inside from every window in the house. Today was hotter than every other day of May. Her exposed from her shirt arms reacted to the warmth of the room, as sweat started to fall down her spine, making her shiver. She stood like a statue in front of the kitchen door. Her gaze travel slowly around the once crowded area, now host only sunlight and familiar smells. Some dishes were being washed in the sink and some freshly baked cookies steamed the room pleasantly, bringing old memories in her mind. It wasn't long ago when she came here for dinner and smelled the same cookies, felt the same heat, watched the same kitchen, although it was cramped then, it was full of life and need of attention, and now it was lonely, screaming for a single person to mind the defying silence and maybe bothered by it.
It felt empty. The house felt empty, even if the clothes were waiting on the sofa to be folded and the shining floors were obvious cleaned, it felt unreal. The continuous sound of the running water grew yet another small shiver at the very last cell of her fingertips.
Being alone in the Weasley residence felt wrong all of the sudden - not because she was not feeling comfortable, she could still spend some time here, eat, talk, laugh with the people she grew up with - it was something else drilling its way to her realization, she couldn't find the nerve to call it her home as Molly offered so many years ago. Was it wrong of her to do so? Was it unfair to the history they were sharing? Or was it just perfect, because it was secretly pointing out her own growth, her own path in life?
Maybe she was overthinking about it, maybe she should just do the thing she came here to do and leave - come back only for a Sunday dinner, surrounding this empty space with the Family that was like her own personal universe.
A cracky sound made her whole body turn around and see the surprised but yet slightly amused face of Molly, holding two huge bags, as several fabrics were floating around her, founding their way to the nearest empty corner to pile.
Her forced giggles made Hermione take a wide step and free her one arm. ''Thank you, dear.'' her whole face finally shown, revealing red cheeks, and one rather pinkish nose. ''Thank you.'' she repeated, watching Hermione's thin body carrying the heavy bag.
''Seems you have a craft.'' she took a big breath, leaving on the floor the bag and watching Molly doing the same. It had been a month since she saw her. Nowadays she looked tired, thinner than she remembered her.
''Don't we have a child, growing faster than a summer day?'' her laughter vibrated the whole kitchen, giving life to the voidness. Without knowing why, Hermione's eyes watched the dishes again. ''Are you hungry dear? Maybe some pumpkin cake - ''
''No.'' Hermione rushed to speak, feeling more uncomfortable than before. ''No, I am - I have already eaten.'' she lied, feeling the tea she drank this morning with Draco wave her stomach like a wild, stormfull sea. ''I am here for Ron. Can I see him?'' she asked and sighed, treasuring the image of Draco's face in her mind, wanting to relax.
''Ron? What time is it?'' she turned her head to her right, watching Hermione's picture next to Ron's in the clock. A melancholic shiver covered her shoulders and her almost sad eyes fell upon the young witch. A sad smile decorated her face and she took several big breaths. ''Well, I do not believe his therapy ended yet - ''
''Therapy?'' she spoke with amusement, not missing the way Molly's eyes almost teared up. Did she believe she wanted to cry because she remembered the good old days when Hermione and Ron used to be together and around this very house more often? Yes. Did she believe she will ever talk to the old witch about it? No. ''What kind of a therapy?'' her voice heard strange to her ears, as if it was not hers, as if it was someone else's - a person she never, ever wanted to became.
''Haven't Harry said a word?'' she looked at her, disbelieving her knowledge. ''I swear, that boy will never learn what to keep for himself and not.'' she gave Hermione a meaningful gaze, making her look at her feet. She let her robes fall from her shoulders and placed them on top of the nearest chair. At once her natural colour returned to her slightly troubled face. ''Some kind of a freshly brought program our Health Department found to earn some more galleons from its citizens. Meaningless if you ask me, but Ron insists - '' another cracky sound coloured the space between them, making the two women see the weirdly placed staircase.
''I see.'' she took her eyes away from it, watching Molly's awkward smile. ''What time is the therapy - ''
''It never has a certain, well anything. Either hours or days - ''
''What kind of a program is that?'' Hermione frowned, but Molly had already taken her eyes away from her.
''Tea then?'' she offered and rushed to grab two cups and place them on the table. She stood with her head low for a second, trying to put her mind in order. ''I have to say, I never thought you will ever visit our home again.'' Molly whispered and dared not to meet Hermione's embarrassed gaze. ''I do feel sorry for the fate you two children choose, but - ''
''Everything happened for a reason, isn't that what my people say these days?'' Hermione spoke with a bitter voice, biting the inside of her cheek as Molly put the water to boil.
''Is it?'' Molly turned around to see her this time. She was biting her bottom lip, desperately trying to keep her mouth from mumbling the thing she wanted the most, especially when either Harry or Charlie ever said a word about what happened some months ago. ''Tell me, Hermione.'' she sighed, closing her eyes in defeat. ''Tell me what happened, I beg you.'' she whispered again, finding the nearest chair to sit and raise her eyes, meeting Hermione's. ''Tell about Ron. Tell me the truth.'' it was her eyes begged her this time, and her hands tangled together, an invisible glue stick them close enough, leaving place only for the sweat and the veins.
''What - You mean the court - ''
''The truth, I want the truth!'' her patience ran thin, and she jumped at the sound of the boiled water. She looked at her, then the pot on top of the counter. She stood up at once, serving the water into a big pot and putting in in the middle of the table, where some sugar cubes were there from earlier that day. ''I am sorry.'' she said, sitting down again and offering Hermione a seat as well.
It took her a while to do so, as her eyes were scanning the face of the elder witch, looking at her confused - maybe a bit scared too, but certainly worried. Hermione pulled back the chair, sitting and watching her slightly shaking hands pouring water to the empty cups. She frowned and rushed to grab the pot from her. ''Allow me.'' she said with a calm voice, noticing her watery eyes. Hermione placed the filled cup in front of her. She tried to make her see her, but failed. Hermione ran her tongue to her lips, pressing them together afterwards. It was strange to not hear her voice being cheerful, motherly colourful and full of love. Guilt created in her heart. ''Molly?'' she called her and she rose her tearing eyes to see the once glowing face of Hermione now being covered in a veil of sadness and worry.
''I lost a son.'' Molly cried, making Hermione froze to her spot and overfill her own cup. She jumped to her feet, cursing under her tongue and walking fast to the counter to grab a towel, only to see Molly cleaning the table using her wand. Her knees felt weak. There was so much pain in her voice, so much sorrow. ''I cannot lose another.''
''Molly - '' she opened her mouth to talk, but the old witch laughed nervously, turning her torso to her, watching her petite body resting against the counter.
''What will he do Hermione? What future is not feared by his actions?'' a hurting, trembling voice burned Hermione's heart. She was expecting an answer from her and she knew it, but right now, she didn't have any. She walked towards her, ordering the floating thoughts of hers, wishing she could find a better way to deal with her depressed thinking.
''What is that you fear the most?'' Hermione sat next to her and spoke with a calm voice, meeting her eyes. ''You fear for his future, what he can do, or what outcome his actions will bring afterwards?'' she asked and watched Molly's eyes tearing. Her hand found hers. She was warm, like any other mother. And she was worried. Her grip tightened, wanting to give her some of her strength. ''I cannot tell you what will he do in the future Molly, I just know he will be alright. He is a strong, caring man and he deserves a good life.'' the tone in her voice changed, filling the room with a bit of a more optimistic vibe.
But she didn't dare to see it, she didn't dare to face it - not yet at least.
A louder than the rest two cracky noises sounded, making Molly snap out of it. ''You should go, he is in his room.'' she pulled her hand, watching the clock and standing up, taking the still filled with hot tea cups and putting them in the sink. ''You know the way.'' she added in a small voice, knowing very well it was a bitter one.
Hermione waited for some seconds to make sure she is well, but she had turned her back to the young girl, minding her business with lunch. A smile shown on her face, knowing how ashamed Molly might be feeling after her small conversation. It didn't bother her that she didn't turn around to see her leaving.
ΛVΛ
She found herself on top of the staircase, where Ron's room was. On the wall where the closed door was, there was a picture with the three of them, Harry saying something that made them laugh, Hermione next to Ron, looking at him with loving eyes. She was all over him, not like Lavender but she was. A smile decorated her face as those innocent feelings warming her heart. Wasn't she a different person back then, and not only her. She put her hand on the knob, opening the door with the same nostalgic smile on her lips, ''What the fuck?'' her scream vibrated her whole chest as Ron rushed to push the half naked body of Astoria off him.
''Mom!'' he yelled, throwing the blanket on top of her and sitting up on his bed, grabbing his wrinkled t-shirt furiously putting it on. ''Cannot you knock - Hermione?'' his shocked eyes focus on her and she closed the door, the dark surface being only a centimetre away from her forehead.
Her mouth fell open and she had the most confused face, ''Put your clothes on!'' she heard Astoria's anxious voice. A deep breath exhaled kind of fast, wanting to forget the familiar scent of shared past that made her lungs sticky. She heard a sharp, noisy sound, they were kissing, she thought and forced herself to close her shocked eyes, shit. She felt panic and her hand tightened more around the knob, pushing the door towards her as Ron tried to open it.
''Stop it!'' he yelled, but there was no mad trace in his voice. She tried hard to outshine his strength, ''Could you stop - ''
''Is everything alright?'' Molly's high pitched voice sounded and she lost her concentration, letting her arm fall to her side and the door opened wide.
He put his finger to his lips, shushing her. ''Yes, mom! Sorry.'' he grabbed her arm, pushing her inside the room and closing the door with his foot. ''What are you doing here?'' he asked, bothered by her and the way her roaring eyes travelled from Ron to Astoria and back.
She wanted to answer, Merlin only knew how much she wanted to, but she kept staring at his face, his once young, innocent face that was filled with freckles on his nose and cheeks, now holding a much more mature expression as he was trying to fix his wrinkled t-shirt on top of his body. ''I wanted to see you, I was worried about you - ''
''No.'' Ron rushed to say and shook his head. A sarcastic snort covered the high pitched noise deafing her the past minutes. ''I am here for what?'' he put his hand on his waist, shrugging. ''Two months? You ever thought of coming earlier? Maybe when my whole world exploded - ''
''Are you honestly going to blame me? If you had the slightest idea of what you started - ''
''You know what Hermione?'' he interrupted her, running a hand through his longer than the last time she saw him hair and smiling at her. ''I really don't want to fight.'' he shrugged again, finding Astoria's left shoe and giving it to her.
''This isn't a fight - ''
''I am not mad at you.'' he said, making her raise brows. ''I am really not.''
''Why would you be mad at me?'' she looked at him through narrowed eyes, and the grin on his face grow. ''If someone supposed to be mad, that is me!'' she defended herself, placing a hand on her chest, feeling her fast beating heart.
''Why would you be mad?'' he laughed, finding Astoria's hair clip somewhere on the floor, taking and examining it as she was busy putting her shoes on.
''What is going on inside your head?'' Hermione slightly yelled, feeling her frustration growing.
''I have been asking myself the very question!'' Astoria rose her eyes from her skinny feet, watching the witch looking at her suspiciously. She rolled her eyes, standing up and fixing the brim of her skirt. ''I am his psychologist.'' she spoke with a matter-of-factly way.
''Clearly.'' Hermione rose her brow, taking her eyes from hers, watching Ron still holding that hair clip. She took a big breath, erasing the memory of their naked bodies. ''We have to talk Ron.'' she ordered and his eyes widened at once. He shook his head. His left hand reached to fix the back of Astoria's skirt.
''I am leaving - ''
''No!'' Ron grabbed her hand and gently hide it in his, his lips slightly turned to a pout, his eyes were begging her not to move. ''There is nothing to talk about Mione.'' he placed himself next to Astoria, putting up a smile for Hermione, trying hard to show her his achievement - only to make Astoria blush, in a bad way. ''You can leave.'' he pointed at the door, waving it to open wide.
''I am not going anywhere. Draco is coming.'' Hermione said and Astoria froze to her spot, taking her hand back from his. He frowned, looking at her. ''We will replace you in another location if you are not willing to cooporate with us.'' she warned him, and his attention fell on her.
''You cannot do that!'' he protested, his voice sounded in a shout, more desperate, more depressed than ever. ''Don't do that!''
''We have to. We believe you have been compromised.'' she said in a calm voice, never missing his gaze.
''How would I've been compro - Why?'' he asked confused, his heart filling with unfair feelings and maybe some guilt. ''Why do you care about me all of the sudden? Weren't you the one choosing Malfoy over me?'' he didn't even care to mince his words. He took a step towards her, tightening his jaw, regretting those words the moment he spoke them.
''Ron, don't.'' Astoria walked towards him, feeling his regret, but more importantly, knowing Draco's feelings for Hermione Granger, and guessing Hermione's. He looked at her and she shook her head.
''I left knowing how dangerous it would be for me to stay around. I left because I care about you.'' her lips pressed together, not wanting to remember what he had done. ''As for Draco, you hardly have a say in this.''
''What do you want?'' he took another step, closing the distance between them and watching her brave eyes scanning his face. ''You need something from me! You always do that Hermione!'' he slightly yelled, unfair feelings catching up with him, as memories of the past bombed his mind.
''I always do what?''
''You pretend that everything is fine, you talk as if you have no feelings, you behave as if there is nothing wrong - and when you need something you put that face on - ''
''Stop Ron, you don't want to do that - ''
''Not now Asty.'' she tried to grab his hand, but he waved away from her and closer to Hermione. ''I am tired of always be the one who needs help, I am done be the one who is trying too much! I look at the way you see me Hermione and it is like you see a helpless, strange boy! You can't fix everything Mione!''
''I believe your mind is still exposed. I think you need professional help.''
''I have one!'' he pointed at Astoria with his thumb. ''Finally, everything is clear for me to see!'' he sighed, nervously looking at her, as if he was trying hard to point out himself. She looked sad, but not for the reason he imagined. ''Look Mione. Do you want me to apologize? If it helps you, I will, I am - ''
''I do not need your apology!'' she yelled, feeling her eyes tearing up. ''I don't need to hear empty words!'' she pushed him away when he tried to touch her hand. ''I lost everything I cared about, I had only you and you behaved like an asshole!'' her voice broke at the end, feeling something salty touching her lips. ''I wanted to count on you and you left me! I needed someone and you left me!'' she yelled again, this time more desperate than before. She met Astoria's widened eyes - great, she might be thinking she was jealous of them being together. ''I need my friend back! I need the friend I knew and loved!'' she screamed at his surprised face and frowned. He was not looking at her. She turned around, meeting the grey eyes of the man who had captivated her heart.
He watched at her tearing eyes and she took a big breath, relaxing herself. She rose her hand wiping some off her face, knowing what he might be thinking. She could practically taste his small jealousy seed in the back of her throat. He took his eyes off her, meeting Ron's, then Astoria's - she was redder than a tomato. He wanted to smirk, but he didn't.
''Mrs Weasley called for my arrival.'' he explained, not that he needed to. ''Could you spare us a minute and talk? It is quite urgent.'' his husky voice made her hair behind her neck raise. His eyes fell on her and she left, wiping her eyes with her fingertips and storming out of the confused, chaotic room, to lock herself in the second floor bathroom.
ΛVΛ
She looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. There was a sadness in her eyes, the kind she used to have when she was allowing her guards to fall.
Maybe Ron was right about her, maybe she was pretending. Maybe he could see her poker face better than anyone. She washed her red eyes and salty cheeks, tapping the clean lavender smelling towel on her face. Her hands fixed the vertical strings shirt she was wearing, buckling it in her tight jeans. The light colour of the shirt brought up the redness in her eyes and the pinkness of her cheeks. She made a grin, taking a big breath.
She knew she had to go downstairs, but she just couldn't do it yet. Ron's voice was echoing in her ears, Draco's eyes were burning her mind. She didn't know how much he heard, but if she wanted to guess, a lot of it. She felt ashamed. Bringing up the memory in her mind, she sounded insane. Why did she let herself drown into the feelings of the past? Why did she allow her guards to fall and cry about a situation she hardly controlled?
The knock on the closed door made her look at the wooden surface. She knew who it was, she could smell him standing outside of the door, his patience running thin, his need to leave crowding his tired mind. She kept her lips shut, not wanting to see him right away. He might be thinking she was still in love with Ron, he might be thinking she was playing with his feelings. A knot made her stomach tightened even more. ''Granger.'' he called and she walked to the door, opening it slowly, meeting his expressionless eyes - what was he thinking? She couldn't bare to imagine anymore. He rose a brow and she placed her naked arms inside his opened blazer, letting his warmth take her over, hugging him and resting her head on top of his fast beating heart. It took him a while to hug her back, but when he did, she let her guards down and sobs sounded, making his heart break.
ΛVΛ
She followed Draco downstairs, tightening her hold around his hand the moment her feet touched the last step. He turned around to see her and a smile shown on his face. He stood in front of her, closing the distance between them and raising her hand to kiss it. Even if her eyes followed his moves, she looked away when he saw her. His free hand rose, resting on her face, running his thumb through her lips, never missing the smile on his. He leaned down, placing a kiss to her forehead. ''There are moments I wonder how your mind works.'' he whispered, meeting her eyes.
''I thought you wanted to talk!'' Ron's voice sounded from the kitchen and Draco rolled his eyes.
He let her hand free, walking to the kitchen. Hermione followed him only to stand like a statue when Draco went and sat next to him. Her eyes moved to the other side of the table, where Astoria sat, awkwardly glancing around the room, never meeting Hermione's gaze. This was too weird.
''Alright.'' Molly sighed, watching each of the people in the room. ''I will be in George's and Fred's room, folding some clothes.'' she pointed at the roof, never loosing sight of them all. She took the huge pot and left it on the table, next to a plate of cookies she knew Astoria liked. ''You kids behave properly, you hear me?'' she rose her brows, emphasizing on the last word and looking at the two wizards. Molly walked towards Hermione, placing a hand on her cheek before she disappeared.
Ron made a painful sound, narrowing his eyes. Astoria pointed Hermione with her head, and then narrowed her own eyes to Ron, who was rubbing the calf Astoria hit. ''I'm sorry.'' he mumbled.
''That was great, now once again, this time like you mean it.'' she spoke with a meaningful voice, and he rolled his eyes.
''Sorry Mione. I let my anger get the best of me.'' he looked at her the way he used to when they were kids.
She didn't dare to speak. There was nothing to be told, especially when Steele's voice was playing like a tape in her mind - maybe he was right. She should start seeing him for the man he is today and not the boy she used to know. She walked to the table and sat a seat away from Astoria. The steam from the pot was creating figures one could name if their imagination was wild enough.
The empty cup in front of her had sweet tea. She was hungry and the freshly baked cookies were challenged her to eat them. As if Ron read her mind, he took one eating it sloppy. ''Tea?'' he offered after swallowing.
Hermione took a big breath, taking the pot in her hands and pouring to every mug. She knew she shouldn't have, but wasn't their company odd enough to care about it? Even Astoria looked uncomfortable. She looked at her, then Draco. She didn't know if they were courting before their families arranged the engagement, Draco was not talking about it - but she knew how much Astoria wanted a family. That thought brought a frown to her face as the smell of her sweet tea reached her nose and managed to calm her tensed nerves. She never heard him speaking about a family, not that she was thinking about a family, or a wedding, or whatever a girl in her shoe might be thinking, but he never expressed any positive of negative feeling about it. She looked at him confused - why was she thinking about it all of the sudden?
Ron took a sip from his tea, narrowing his eyes to Draco. He and she were together for some years before ending their relationship. If one asked her about it, she would say it was for the best, they were too different to continue a joined path together. She loved him, she really did, but now as a friend, as someone who was strong and caring and as someone who was always there for her. She felt her eyes tearing up and bit the inside of her cheek, wanting to stop. She didn't want to cry for their lost friendship anymore.
Her eyes rose to see each person in the table, realizing that now she was with Draco, and Ron with Astoria, and almost one year ago, she was happily together with Ron and Draco was with Astoria, shit - ''This is too weird.'' Astoria said and Hermione thanked God that she did. She stood up, taking her robes in hand.
''Where are you going?'' Ron stood up as well, following her. ''Don't leave - ''
''Ron..'' she shook her head. Her eyes fell at Hermione, then at Draco, then at Ron. ''I am sorry.'' she walked to the door, placing her hand on the knob, but Ron grabbed her arm and turned her around.
''They will take their answers and they can leave, not you - ''
''It's not about them.'' she talked calmly watching his confused eyes. ''Maybe it is, I don't know. It's just,'' she pointed at Draco who frowned. ''We were about to engage, and you two,'' she looked at Hermione and Ron, ''This it too much for me. I - I'll see you around.'' she opened the door, storming out.
''Astry!'' he yelled, walking out of the house only to apparate in the kitchen again, blaming his sentence. ''Brilliant. Just brilliant!'' he ran his hands through his hair. ''What do you want? Isn't it enough, you cost me my freedom?'' he looked at Draco who frowned.
''How dare you looking at me.'' he meant to ask, but he failed. Hermione looked at him in a very destructive way, making him clear his throat. ''We have some questions.''
''We.'' Ron's brow rose, interrupting Draco. ''We.'' he repeated, this time a fake smile shown on his face. ''She said I don't have a say for your we.'' he pointed out the last word making Draco narrow his eyes.
''You don't.'' he dangerously said, tightening his jaw.
Ron's gaze travelled from Hermione to Draco and back for some time, Merlin only knew what he had in his mind. She frowned and Draco felt a bit uncomfortable for the first time he stepped his foot in the Burrow. He opened his mouth to speak, but Ron slapped his motionless hand and sat next to him. He extended a finger to his surprised face, ''Don't touch mom's cookies.'' he warned in a perfectly calm voice, surprising Draco even more.
''I would not even consider eating one.'' Draco honestly said, wanting to laugh at the nerve of his.
''You say my mother's cookies aren't good enough for a Malfoy?''
''No, I am simply - ''
''You say you came here and not felt welcome - ''
''I came here to talk to you, not eat - ''
''So you are admitting you are not feeling welcome in my house - ''
''I just wanted to talk - ''
''Aren't we talking - ''
''About cookies?''
''Are you implying my mom's cookies are not worth the talk?'' Ron's voice sounded bothered, but his eyes were quite amused by the sight of Draco Malfoy being speechless and internal confused by the wizard.
He didn't know what he wanted, he didn't know what he should do. Hermione looked mad at Ron, but he couldn't be. Draco cowardly extended his hand to take a cookie only to get his hand slapped again. ''What the fuck, mate?'' he slightly shouted, watching him smirking.
''Do not touch my mother's cookies.'' he pointed out, liking the way his eyes stared amused. He looked at Hermione, who clearly was the least amused of all. She rose a brow at him, questioning him about what was on his mind and shaking her head. ''Relax Mione can you? Merlin's white beard.'' he rolled his eyes, taking another cookie. ''He said I don't have a say for you two being together - ''
''That's because you don't Ron!'' she rose her voice ever the slightest, meeting his amused eyes. He was teasing them.
''You don't get to eat a cookie either.'' he grabbed the plate, bringing it in front of him and taking a sip from his tea. ''Can we done with it please? I have a dragon book to finish.'' his grin meant to disturb Hermione but she looked at him surprised.
''Do you have any contacts with Warlock?'' Draco asked, wanting to finish this whole show and actually talk business. ''Did he contact you before the trial? After?'' his eyes were back to normal now, looking at Ron with his old famous gaze, the one he used to look at people when he thought he was superior than anyone else, but this time he was doing it on purpose, this time he knew what he was talking about, and in his voice there was the confidence of the man who wanting to do something with his knowledge.
Ron examined his eyes for what seemed to be forever. He wasn't looking at him impressed, nor mad, he was just looking at him, trying to understand why on earth he seemed to care about him all of the sudden. Surely he wasn't pretending for Hermione's sake. ''Why you ask?'' Ron waved at him with his head, measuring up his words.
''Warlock's actions are alerting - ''
''Did he ask you to do a certain dirty business for him?'' Hermione's voice sounded cooly, bit annoyed too. She looked at him through experienced eyes. ''One in Azkaban maybe?''
''What are you talking about?'' he sounded bothered and rested his elbows on the table, focusing his attention to Hermione.
''Granger.'' Draco carefully called her and she innocently looked at him, knowing she shouldn't talk about it. ''If you had any contact with him - ''
''I hardly talk to that bloke.'' Ron defended himself and sighed. ''He asked to see me once, but I was too fucked up. I don't remember a lot of things, Charlie says it's for the best.'' he shrugged and tried to forget about his brother.
''Do you remember the court?'' Draco rushed to ask, watching Hermione's narrowed eyes challenging him for what seemed to be the truth.
''I don't!'' he snapped and nervously tapped his fingertips on the table. ''There are images coming back, like a puzzle.'' one hand hid inside his thick hair, resting his head. ''Astry helped. A lot.'' the confessed made him feel a bit ashamed. He looked at the fine handmade tablecloth his mother made, and he caressed it for a second. ''I don't know why I was acting out, before Mentha. Astry says I wanted to prove myself and maybe that was it.'' it was all Hermione would get of an apology for what had happened between them. She didn't mind it, she didn't care to comment on it either.
''What about after Mentha?'' Draco asked him finding interest in his tale.
''A thing I learned in a hard way was its ruthless, those Stones they are not just powerful, they get feed from you.'' he spoke in a whispered and lowered his eyes. ''Do you remember Voldermort's locket?'' he asked Hermione and she nodded, but he didn't see it. ''It was like that, but Mentha, fuck it was triumphantly glorious. First days I had perfect clearness, everything looked brighter and meaningful. I asked to combine my Auror training and Investigation Skills to Illegal Suppstence and Magical Creatures and to my surprise it worked.'' Draco rose a brow to Hermione, having a I-told-you-so look on his face.
''Little by little I lost it.'' Ron continued untroubled, not minding them at all. ''I remember noises and talkers, I remember I was suspicious of everything - I hit my brother!'' he snorted, rubbing his forehead, wanting to forget how ashamed he was. ''I could have killed him!''
''But you didn't Ron.'' her calm voice got his attention and he looked at her.
''I don't remember the trial, as I don't remember the first days here. I only remember noises.''
''Have you talked to Warlock Ron?'' Hermione asked, placing her hands together and on top of the table.
''No!'' he looked tired from that question, but she was not having it.
''Are you sure?'' she pushed him to answer, shrugging.
''Why would I lie?''
''Why wouldn't you?''
''I'm keeping captive in my own house for a fucking nonsensely shit that I did, which is a very fucking nonsensely shit Hermione, and I regret it, I really do, but I thought you knew me better than call me a liar!'' he shouted and placed his body closer to the table, looking at her fiery eyes, both carrying little of what they were starting.
''I used to know you!'' she pointed out at him and at once her blood started to boil. Years of questions and no answers found their way to the surface and her mouth opened wide, speaking her pain, feeding her sorrow once and for all, knowing she will never have to do this again. ''The man I see now has nothing to do with the man I came to know, so yes, I will call you a liar if you keep acting the way you do, harassing my feelings, putting your egoistic self on top of anyone - ''
''I am being egoistic?'' he yelled at her, but she hadn't even heard him.
'' - acting as if you are the only one with feelings - ''
''Me? I think you forgot who said she needs to find her own self because all this has made her lost her identity - '' he looked at the space between them making her gasp.
''How dare you implying - ''
''I am not implying anything, I am setting things straight so when Malfoy-boy here finally sees where you two are going, he can say he was being warned!'' he put a hand on Draco's shoulder and he frowned, eyeing his hand on his expensive suit and awkwardly moving his torso away.
''Do you have any idea what you have started?'' her throat was burning now, she might even start spitting fire.
''Despite the love triangle here - '' he swinged his finger around and looked the disgusted face of Hermione.
''I am just going to..'' Draco stood up, fixing the blazer on his body, his eyes looking at the door Astoria had used before as a salvation.
''Draco, no, please - '' she stood up, but he had already gone. She came to look at the door and his tall body walking down the porch and to the front of the house, but not leaving, not apparating. A sigh escaped from her lips. She watched him reaching his inner pocket and taking a cigarette out, it was the first time after his father's funeral she saw him smoking, and she noted herself to blame Nestor Steele about it. He lightened it up, his one hand traced his backwards styled hair and rested on his neck, as a cloud of smoke escaped his lips and freed to the world in front him.
He had his back turned towards the house, making her worry of what he might be thinking - her heartbeats felt shorter.
Ron smirked, but she was not paying attention to him. ''Call it even then?'' he asked taking a cookie. She turned around, narrowing her pained eyes at him.
''Why would you do that?'' she asked cooly, feeling the anger in her heart boiling. ''Why?''
''Hermione, is there a reason to misbehave? I wanted it to and I did it.'' he shrugged, making her even more upset.
''How can you be so immature?'' the words came out of her mouth without a thinking. She walked back to the table, sitting down and taking the cookie from him.
''Pick an excuse for me Mione, like you have done every other time - ''
''The only thing I ever wanted was for you to understand how I feel!'' she yelled, making Molly come downstairs. She looked at them with a strict way before finding her way upstairs again. Her cheeks fired up. The idea of causing the elder witch any type of worried feeling didn't suit her well. Her gaze fell from the empty now staircase to her hands. She didn't want to see Ron, not now at least. There were so many feelings boiling under her skin, and he simply behaved childlish.
With the corner of her eye she caught sight of Draco's tall body. She turned her gaze to him, watching only half of his back and his radiating under the sun hair. Smoke was still coming out of his mouth, and he had taken off his blazer, holding it with one, maybe two fingers on top of his shoulder. He looked like a movie star, an old movie star, one that brought young girls to sigh as he was walking by.
''How about what I feel?'' Ron asked and she looked at him. She frowned and the expression she had just a minute ago, a lovely expression, the kind a school girl has when she is in love, changed. She was now looking at him with confusion, maybe some unspeakable anger.
''You think this is my fault?'' she waved her finger between them, mimicking his previous moves with dare. ''Do not compare what you have done to us, to what I have done!''
''And what is that Hermione?'' he answered at once, trying to focus on the conversation and not his feelings, trying to sound like a man and not a boy. ''What have you done for us exactly?'' it was his turn to mimic the swinging-finger move, looking at her hurtful, as the realization started to hit her hard - good, that was what he needed. Without wanting to, his eyes fell to her bare ring finger. There were times the past months when he caught himself thinking about what would have happened, if they hadn't have fallen apart. What would happen if they were still together? Would they be married by now? Have kids and a house to call their own? Would they be happy? Or would they simply tolerate each other?
Deep down, he knew they had an expiration date, but even if he knew it, it was he who pushed things further, it was him who wanted to try more. It was he who cornered their relationship to the finish line and ended it. He drove her away, he made them fall apart.
''Nothing.'' she said at last, looking at his fallen face. ''I have done nothing.'' she realized, and at once her heart skips some beats.
''You don't get to be upset.'' his voice sounded hurt, a bit dark even. ''You don't get to be angry at me Hermione.'' his shaken head fell, watching the tablecloth his mother made. The ticking of the clock burned his ears. There was a shameful veil covering his mind as images of them arguing about silly things popped up. There was a time they were happy together, a time they laughed and dreamed, a time they shared their stories and their secrets, but also there was a time they were unhappy, a time they fought, lived miserably and apart, a time when they only shared half words and side eyes, where there was no trust, no future.
''I am not angry.'' she felt her eyes fill with tears as those times popped into her own mind too. ''I am heartbroken!'' a warm tear salted her cheek, only to fall down her neck. ''I feel used, betrayed.'' a deep breath filled her lungs. ''Either you or Harry ever asked how I was, you thought I was fine - and you were right before. I was pretending to be.'' with the corner of her eye, she saw Draco walking outside the house. His blazer still on top of his left shoulder, his eyes scanning the emptiness around him, his skin glowing under the sun - and suddenly everything looked clearer than every other time. Everything looked greater, simplier. It was him who caused her feelings to blossom, it was he who offered her the gift of love without even noticing. ''I, I..'' she mumbled, and Draco walked away from that window. ''I am just, I think I just - ''
''Yes?'' he asked sarcastically, but she didn't even notice.
''I grew up Ron.'' she looked at him with kind eyes, realizing what she was missing this whole time. ''And when I did, you weren't even able to follow.'' a deep sigh escaped from her lips. ''And it broke my heart. Because there was a time that I loved you.'' she smiled at him, ''And you loved me.'' her smile grew wider, ''There is nothing in the world that can take it away from us.'' his lips fell apart, wanting more air. He was feeling his eyes tearing up, but there was no way he would cry. ''And it broke my heart when I had to let you go, and it breaks it now when we fight like this. We have nothing against each other Ron, why are we fighting for?'' she asked and his lips pressed together. He wasn't mad. He wasn't offended. He simply thought twice of what she was saying.
And suddenly she realized - she realized what she was missing from the story, his anger, his regret. He was blaming himself for their break up.
She looked at him. She wanted to tell him it was not his fault. She wanted to tell him it will be alright - but his gaze was telling her the same thing. ''I know I have been acting a bit - ''
''Greedy?'' she snorted, watching the way his smile show under the morning sun. He ran his hand through his hair, watching her wipe her eyes and taking a big breath. ''I am sorry I've been so distant.'' she nodded and he did the same. ''I was trying to protect you.''
''I know you did Mione. You always are.'' his lips curled from one side and he rested his upper weight on top of his elbows, bringing himself closer to her. ''What do you want to know.'' he offered for one and last time and she looked at him relieved.
''Have you talked to Warlock?''
''The only time we ever spoke was when he gave me my pass to visit St. Mungo's.'' he looked at her sincerely and rose his tea cup, taking a fat sip. ''He implied how fucked I was. How I looked like a drug addict. When he left, he said to my father if I ever need anything to not hesitate and talk to him - I am not stupid. He is, but I'm not.''
''Is that all?'' she asked and he nodded, breathing the smoke from his mug. She sighed relieved, reassuring herself of her earlier beliefs - he would never help a criminal. He met her eyes, encouraging her next question. ''Do you have any weird symptoms - ''
''Nausea, mostly in the morning. Headaches, especially after a memory comes back.''
''About that night?'' she whispered and held her breath when he nodded.
''I remembered everything, well, nearly, there are some blank spots, but nothing important.'' he corrected his previous statement, and she rose her brows in anticipation. He rolled his eyes, not really wanting to say again what happen. ''I went to Oz's. Theophile came after me, we talked, he offered me the galleons, I offered him the Stone. I wrote to Pharris, I visited Harry. I passed out. The poison he gave me was tasteful.'' he shrugged and cleared his throat. ''Nice cover up with the dead Muggle.'' he rose his brow watching the surprised eyes of Hermione. ''Astroria.'' he nodded and she did the same. They both looked at their hands. ''When Kingsley came to Hogwarts and asked for your help, was it because of Nehone?'' he asked in a whispered after he made sure his mother was not near and took her off guard. ''You could have said something.''
''What good would it bring?'' she gave him a sad smile. ''We will find a way to fix it. I promise.'' she took a big breath, turning her attention outside where Draco was nowhere to be found. She hadn't heard the opening and closing of the door, either she smelled his cologne as he was standing behind the wall, hearing them talking for the past minutes.
''You and Mr Asshole over there?'' he asked with a smirk only to shout when she kicked his calf. Ron painfully laughed and Draco smirked. ''Why you are with him? There are so many wizards - ''
''Why are you fucking Astoria Greengrass, there are so many witches -''
''Alright, alright.'' Ron took his eyes away from her, wishing he hadn't asked in the first place. ''It's just physical.'' Ron admitted and she frowned. ''She is courting someone else, she just like the sex.'' he pointed at himself, making her grin. He laughed again, hearing her saying, dear God too many times and falling back to silence.
Her eyes searched the yard in front to find Draco, but he was gone. She guessed he might be walking around the house, thinking of what he heard her saying to Ron earlier. The idea knobbed her stomach, making her feel nauseating. ''He is insufferable.'' she said making Ron rose his brows. ''He is cunning and witty, and never ever runs out of things he can brag himself about, and God, he is stubborn - he says I am stubborn, me can you believe it? But he, Ron, he is the king of Stubbornville - and he is annoying, do you have any idea how annoying he is?'' she stopped to take a breath and watched the surprised eyes of her friend.
''I can imagine - ''
''And he is spoiled! Do you know what he did when we first started to work together? He bought all three first ever broom specimens!''
''What?!'' Ron widened his eyes, feeling his drools covering his mouth.
''Yes!'' she slightly shouted, but for the wrong reason - he was impressed, she was annoyed. ''Gifted one to Blaise Zabini, one to Adrian Pucey - ''
''Where did he find - ''
''Why would someone want to have those flying murderers in their house - do you know it can't stop jumping around its box? It is like it has its own personality? Why would he want to have one of those?'' she tried to catch her breath while waited for an answer from his impressed self.
''No one would mind it really, it's amazing - ''
''And he always calls me Granger!'' she spoke the most infuriating thing of all, caring little about what Ron had to say about the broom. ''Why does he always call me Granger? I have a name! Don't I have a name Ron?'' she let her breath out, only to take another one. ''God, he drives me crazy! Crazy!'' she slightly shouted again, this time smelling something familiar in the air, making her breathing and heart calm down. ''Crazy and unexpectedly calm.'' she frowned with her own words, taking deeper breaths, clearer ones, smelling him closer than he was. ''Whenever I am with him, he does this thing - ''
''What thing?''
''Nothing. He does nothing. He is just there. With me.'' she took another big breath. Feelings filled her heart as flowers in the very first week of spring. She smiled to herself bringing up the memory of him in her mind and her eyes closed. ''And every time he is there, my mind stops, and everything turns blank, and there is no thought, no worry, nothing, there is only him, and my heart!'' something alive was winding her stomach now, ''My heart is beating fast - faster than any other time it ever beat, almost exploding, and my stomach,'' she placed her hands on top of it, ''Turns to a knot, and every time that knot grows more and more and then I can't even think of him, because everything is different, and new and it all feels..''
''Better?'' he sighed, knowing how she is feeling. It was half of the emotions he had for her. She opened her eyes and looked at him. A weak smile was playing on his lips.
''Right. Everything feels right.'' she confessed in a whisper that reached Draco's ears like a child's prayer reaching God. He looked at his feet. A smile was trying to show on his face and it did, slowly widening and hurting his face muscles. He wanted to go to her, to tell her how similar he was feeling, how much she changed him - he looked back at the beginning of their partnership and he saw a different man from the one standing hidden in the Burrow, well slightly different.
''To your concern, it sounds right too.'' Ron nodded, finally seeing why they never work as a couple. He extended his hand, touching hers and squeezing it ever the slightest - it took her off guard and he knew it. She smiled at him, holding him tight too. They heard the door opening and closing. Ron rushed to take his hand off hers, but Draco had already looked at him disapproving. His eyes narrowed, making Ron mimic him.
He had left his blazer somewhere because his hands were now free and hidden in his slacks pockets. His expressionless gaze was travelling to the couple on the table, trying his best to hide the pleased face from them. ''Is everything alright?'' he asked, thanking Merlin his heart beat turned back to normal, until she looked at him with those big brown eyes and it skipped a beat. He wanted to smirk, he wanted to go to her, maybe kiss her, or simply hug her, tell her how much it meant for him to hear those words from her, but it was not the time for it. He just looked at her, admiring her beauty, her mind, her soul, admiring her courage and her strength.
''Yes.'' she nodded, fearing to smile. ''We were talking - ''
''I saw that.'' his eyes fell to the place where their hands met and then to her. ''I guess your questions has been answered?'' she nodded and stood up from her seat. Ron did the same, standing some inches away from her.
He smiled at her and she did the same. ''I will fix it.'' she promised and he nodded, watching Malfoy with the corner of his eye.
''You can have a cookie if you want.'' he offered, looking at his feet. Hermione's lips curled more, reaching the plate and taking on in her hand.
''He'd love to.'' she rose a brow to Draco, who rolled his eyes.
''I would have already owl Miss Greengress. Rejection is not a colour Slytherins pull off.'' he advised and Hermione gave him an appreciation nod.
''Even if I had communications privileges, she would be the last to get my owl.'' he faked a snort, crossing his arms under his chest and meeting Draco's sarcastic gaze.
''It's just physical.'' Hermione said in a matter-of-factly way, making Draco frown and wrinkle his upper face in an uncharacteristically expression.
''No, it isn't.'' he snorted and looked at Ron's surprised but slightly red face. ''When Purebloods mate, they mate for life. We don't fuck around Granger.'' he informed her and she looked at him shocked.
''Oh my God!'' she laughed and tried to cross her own arms under her chest, only to stop because of the cookie. ''Wasn't your name in Witch Weekly along with some new bimbo's?'' her laughter continued.
''Irrelevant.'' he glanced around the room, shrugging.
''No, it isn't - ''
''Yes, it is, because you don't see my name - ''
''Can you leave?'' Ron asked, his attention was on two of them. They both said yes, at the same time, walking to the door.
Draco extended his hand, taking his hanged on the wall blazer and Hermione said goodbye to Ron, who walked them till the end of their porch. He watched them stepping on the front yard, Hermione breaking the cookie in half, offering a piece to Draco, who looked down at her and to his surprise, smiled, eating it. His hand gently grabbed hers, whispering something before apparate.