James:

"Lily, can I please come in?"

James was met with silence as he stared at the closed door.

He swallowed hard. They couldn't leave it like this.

"Lily, I'm sure you're upset with me, and you should be. Can I explain, please?"

Her continued silence made his chest ache twice as much as it already did.

"Lily, I fell for you the moment I saw you. I had traveled to Privet to figure out what was going on, but from the moment I saw you I didn't care anymore. All I wanted was to be with you. Then we saw your picture and it just seemed fated. I was sure that you'd run from me if you knew who I was, so I lied. But Lily I've been trying to figure out how to come clean with you since we crossed into Ottery."

James fisted his hand in his hair as Lily continued to be silent on the other side of the door.

"James," Marlene's soft voice sounded behind him and he turned, "Remus is ready. Do try to be careful."

James looked back at the closed door.

"I'm sorry, Lily."

He sighed and went to turn before stopping and turning back and taking a step closer to the door.

"I love you."

He turned to see Marlene looking at him with an expression he couldn't name.

"Thank you for saving Sirius, and me, and just, thank you."

"You're welcome," she nodded but her expression remained unchanged, "be safe."

James gave the door one last longing look before walking away.

Sirius' litter was attached to the Griffin and Remus was watching it with apprehension all over his face.

"Am I driving or holding Sirius still?"

Remus frowned, "I'm driving, you're taking responsibility for your actions." He jumped up on the Griffin, "Don't let him move, James."

James nodded and pulled his wand before climbing on and facing backward. The beast's wings flapped twice as it jumped and then they were flying.

It took a great deal of effort, but James managed to keep Sirius stable as they flew. The flight had taken Remus just under two hours, but it was taking them closer to four. Every hour they had to stop and dose Sirius with the potion, and if Remus went too fast it was impossible for James to keep Sirius still. But they managed it before the sunset, landing under an invisibility charm in one of the palace's private gardens.

"Merlin, James what did you do?" Peter looked down at Sirius with wide eyes as Remus lifted the charm.

"Can we please talk about how much I've screwed up after Remus has Sirius back on his feet again?" James shot back.

He felt like his world was collapsing around him, and there was no one to help hold it up with him.

"Pete, go grab Elias," Remus levitated Sirius inside slowly.

"Why do you need Dad's old guardian?" James frowned.

"You need a guardian, because right now, if something were to happen to you, Marlene might drop dead."

James shook his head as he followed him, "Sirius is my guardian, not Marlene."

"She told me that Sirius and she had compacted to share the load while the four of you were traveling. When Sirius went down, you went under her protection." Remus paused to gingerly move Sirius onto his bed. "I promised to relieve her of that responsibility as soon as I could."

James blinked.

Sirius didn't share his guardianship.

"James if your father were still alive he'd turn you over his knee!" Elias came crashing in with Peter in his wake.

"Hi Elias," James sighed and turned to his late father's guardian.

"What in Merlin's name were you doing that you almost got Sirius killed?"

"Can we please go over that when I don't feel lower than dirt?" James fisted a hand in his hair. "I'm well aware that I've made a fool of myself! I know I've made a mess of more than any of you prats are aware of! So just let me sort through how I'm going to fix all this, alright?!"

James tried to breathe deeply, to calm the panic bubbling up inside of him.

"Elias," Remus spoke after a few moments, "is there anything you need to do to formally take over James' guardianship? Sirius compacted with another guardian to protect each other's charges and so James is under her care right now."

Elias frowned, "Sirius doesn't share James."

Remus shrugged, "That's what I said, but the woman invited me to test it. I took that as a fair indication she wasn't joking."

"Just to be safe then," Elias looked down at Sirius with pursed lips a moment before turning to face James. "Until such time that your guardian recovers, I accept full responsibility for your protection and physical well being. I stand in his stead, and die in your place."

James sighed, "You didn't have to be so formal about it."

Elias shook his head, "I don't want to find out that some poor woman dropped dead because I didn't make my intentions clear. Now, your Majesty, your court would love to see you alive and well. Poor Remus and Peter have been lying through their teeth to everyone."

"What about Sirius?" James shook his head.

"We'll tell everyone he caught whatever sickness you had shortly after you came down with it, but should hopefully be better soon. It makes sense that I'd take over for him in any case. Let's get you bathed and dressed in time to sup with the court.." Elias moved into James' room and started preparing his royal robes.

"But…"

"James," Peter put a hand on his arm, "your country needs you too."

James groaned. He was being pulled in two directions and he felt like his brain was going to implode from it. But Peter was right. He'd abandoned his kingdom for close to two months. His responsibilities were here, and he was honor-bound to uphold them.

No matter how much he wanted to sit at Sirius' bedside until he woke up.