Chapter 46: An Eye for an Eye

Vengeance is an illness
Not of the body
Nor of the mind
But of the soul
It kills many
But those afflicted, it destroys
The only cure is the hardest trial
Forgiveness

"You did not!"

"I did."

"How did you convince them to go along with that?"

"Even at 16, I was very persuasive."

Tali laughed. "Clearly. I wish I could've seen Garrus' face."

Terra smirked. "He was quite shocked to see me, that's for sure." As her quarian friend continued checking the systems for ways to implement her shield upgrades, Terra was relaying the story of her misadventure stowing away on Garrus' scouting tour. It was a slow day so far and it was nice to just get to talk to her friend, even if she was working at the same time.

"I take it the rest of the crew weren't so happy to have a human onboard," Tali remarked as she ducked down below her console to fiddle with some wires.

Terra shrugged. "Most of them kept the complaints to themselves, but there were a couple who really didn't like me. I took care of that by beating one of their golden boys in a sparring match."

Tali looked at her in amazement. "Seriously?"

"Seriously. You should've seen that guy's reaction to getting trounced by a little human farm girl."

Tali almost started laughing. "You should've had Garrus record that."

"Oh, I should've!" Just like that, she was laughing with her. It felt good to do that. The only other person she'd bonded with so easily was Solana. Maybe Tali was getting to be like a sister to her as well.

They continued the conversation for another minute or so before Terra's COMM pinged. Tali was fiddling with the wiring again, so she left her to it and answered. "Shepard."

"Terra. Do you have a minute?"

She smiled at the sound of his voice. "I always have time for you, Garrus."

But she couldn't hear any shift in his tones that implied he was smiling with her. "Meet me in the battery. We need to talk."

She started getting worried when the line disconnected. She could tell something was wrong. "Tali—"

"Go on," Tali waved her off without even coming out from under the console, "If he needs you, he needs you."

Terra smiled briefly. "I'll be back when I can." She quickly headed around the corner to the elevator. She only needed to take it up one floor, but she still felt like it was going too slow. When the doors opened, she raced straight into the main battery. "Garrus!" she said as the doors opened, "What's wrong?"

Garrus was positioned at the console, but he clearly wasn't paying any attention to the algorithms scrolling across it. With a sigh, he turned to face her. "…you remember what happened on Omega? Sidonis?"

She nodded.

"…I've found him."

Her eyes widened at those words. "What?"

"Someone saw him on the Citadel with a forger named Fade, specializes in helping people disappear. If we can get to him, we can get to Sidonis."

Terra didn't need to hear any more. If they had a chance of catching the guy who had nearly killed her turian, they were taking it. She'd make sure of it. "EDI! Tell Joker to set a course for the Serpent Nebula."

"Right away, Shepard," EDI answered.

Garrus sighed with relief at those words. "I can never thank you enough for this, Terra."

"You don't need to thank me," Terra shook her head, "I want to stop him as much as you do. Just like Saleon." She smiled conspiratorially. "So what say we do this just you and me again?"

He smiled with her. "Let's do it."

It took a few hours for the ship to reach the Citadel, time Terra and Garrus used to gear up and prepare. They didn't know what to expect, after all, and Terra's Spectre status would give them free reign. Terra was ready to lend him emotional support at a moment's notice, because even Garrus couldn't pretend to be perfectly fine with hunting down someone he used to trust or with the betrayal they were out to avenge, but he stayed quiet for now. Once they were docked, the two of them left the ship hand in hand, ready for anything.

"Where are we going?" Terra asked, following him for once.

"I arranged a meeting with Fade at a warehouse on Zakera Ward," Garrus answered, "Just stay close."

"Oh, I'm not leaving your side."

He couldn't help a small smile when he heard her say that. Friend or girlfriend, some things never changed.

They made their way from the docks to the warehouse, still hand in hand. It seemed no different from their outings on the Citadel in the past, sticking close to each other as he showed her around the station, but it was as different as could be. There was no stopping to see the sights or detours for the sake of passing time together. They moved with purpose, soldiers on a mission—a personal mission, at that—and didn't stop moving until they arrived at their destination. Only then did they let go of each other and prepare for things to go south.

The warehouse was empty except for two krogan bodyguards, standing there, waiting for them, ready for a fight. A volus then stepped out from behind a stack of boxes.

"You're Fade?" Terra asked, "You're not quite how I pictured you."

"Looks can be deceiving," the volus said, "Now, which one of you wants to disappear?"

"I'd rather see you make someone reappear," Garrus sneered.

"Oh…that's not the service we provide."

"Make an exception," he snapped, drawing his rifle, "just this once."

The volus, of course, freaked out and turned to the krogan. "Quick! Shoot them! Shoot them, you lumbering mountains!" Then he turned back to face the two of them and found that Terra had drawn her pistol as well.

"Why don't you two find somewhere else to skulk?" Garrus told the krogan.

The two exchanged looks and finally stepped away.

"What?!" the volus demanded, "That's it?! Just like that?!" He groaned. "What's the point in hiring protection if they won't protect you?"

Terra took a moment to smirk at the irony before stepping in to continue the intimidation. "We're looking for one of your clients, Fade. I suggest you start talking."

The volus instantly shrunk back. "Not mine! I'm not Fade! I just work for him!"

Terra sighed, putting her gun away. "I knew it."

Garrus lowered his rifle and stepped closer to the volus, kneeling down to eye level with him. "Well, then maybe you'd like to tell us where to find him."

"Yes, of course!" the volus answered, "He's in the factory district. Works out of the old prefab foundry."

Garrus nodded. "I know the place."

"Oh, he's got a lot of mercenaries there. Blue Suns. Harkin thinks they're protecting him."

"Harkin?!" Garrus demanded, jumping to his feet.

"What?" Terra asked, "Who's Harkin?"

"We worked together at C-Sec!"

"What?! How'd a C-Sec agent end up a wanted forger?!"

"He was always getting suspended for drinking on the job. He must have finally gotten fired while I was on Omega."

"Oh, he did," the volus explained, "He used his knowledge of C-Sec's systems to help a few people disappear. Then he made himself disappear and Fade was born! …so to speak."

Terra could tell she wasn't going to like the guy. And he wasn't going to cooperate easily. "We'd better get to the factory district fast if we're gonna catch him."

"Right," Garrus said, "There's a transit station not far from here. We can get to the foundry that way."

"So…" the volus said, "…I can go?"

"Oh, sure. But if we don't find Harkin, we'll be back for you." He said that with a threatening wave of his rifle, accompanied by a reach for her pistol from Terra.

"…oh…good." The volus finally walked off.

Garrus stowed his rifle and led Terra off to the transit station. All the way there, Terra kept an eye on her turian. He was tensing already. To anyone else, he might seem stoic and reserved, but she could see the pain in his eyes and the fury in his posture. She quickly laid her hand on his arm to calm him and remind him she was there. He accepted the gesture, laying his hand over hers in return, but he didn't seem to calm at all. Maybe it was because she had laid her hand over the mark on his armor and reminded him of the people who'd borne it with him, the people who had died because of the one they were looking for now. She didn't have the words for this one, so she merely stayed close to him until they arrived then followed him to the foundry.

When they arrived, a human who could only be Harkin was entering the foundry with a small contingent of guards. He stopped when he heard Terra and Garrus show up and draw their weapons. He didn't take long to turn to the mercs standing guard. "Well, don't just stand there! Stop them! Stop them!" He then rushed into the building.

"RUN ALL YOU WANT, HARKIN!" Garrus shouted after him as he pulled his rifle out again, "WE'LL FIND YOU!" He then ducked behind cover with Terra as the mercs opened fire.

There weren't enough mercs at the door to keep them from entering. There was a slightly larger contingent, accompanied by a few mechs, waiting inside, but that was no more difficult. Garrus was able to overload the mechs to immobilize them, giving Terra the chance to take them out while he sniped every mercenary that came within 100 meters of them. As they made their way deeper into the factory, Terra occasionally glanced at Garrus and saw that same tension rising. She couldn't blame him, he'd been hurt badly, but she didn't like seeing him this way. The Garrus she loved was upbeat, compassionate, a little cocky. This Garrus was different, colder. Every target he dropped only made it worse. She started pushing harder to get them through to the other end of the factory. The sooner this was over, the sooner he could think straight again.

They eventually made it to a security room and stopped to catch their breath. While Garrus was opening the shutters on a window to scope out the last section of the foundry, Terra was scoping out him. Even just standing here, he was getting angrier by the second. She finally walked up to him as he gazed out the window. "You worked with Harkin at C-Sec?"

"He always was a pain," Garrus growled, "But I'm in no mood for his games. If he doesn't cooperate, I'll beat him within an inch of his life."

That confirmed it for her. Something was wrong—not with the mission, but with him. "Garrus, you're starting to worry me. I've never seen you like this before."

The words didn't seem to penetrate, though. "Harkin may know why Sidonis wanted to disappear. If he does, then he knows why we're here and I don't want him tipping Sidonis off."

She shrugged. "Fair enough. But you're still acting kind of…rough. Are you sure you're OK?" She started to reach for his hand again.

He pulled back before she could touch it. "I'm not going to be OK until Sidonis is dealt with!"

She looked at him, certain there was more behind those words than she was willing to hear. As he pulled back, he briefly met her eyes. The raging fire she saw in his brought realization crashing into her mind. "…Garrus…what exactly are you planning to do when you find him?"

He had been reluctant to say so until now because he knew she would try to talk him down. Now she was figuring it out, and since she was going to see when the time came anyway, he knew he didn't have a choice but to answer her. So he did. "You humans have a saying: 'An eye for an eye, a life for a life.'" He stood firm while he said it, as if it was only logical. "He owes me ten lives. I intend to collect."

She knew it was anything but. She found her eyes widening in shock. "Garrus, no! That's not the answer!"

He'd been expecting this. He hated to disregard her like this, but his mind was made up. "You can't talk me out of it, Terra. I have to do this."

"No, you don't! You don't answer bloodshed with more blood."

He just scoffed at her. "Oh, really? Saren, Saleon, the Collectors—"

"That's different! They were out to hurt people, they didn't give us a choice. This is petty revenge!"

"This is justice! If I don't do this, no one will! He killed ten people who trusted him, Terra, and I can't let him get away with that!" He turned away from her, looking back out the window. "I'll pull the trigger. I'll live with the consequences. It'll be quick and painless. Unlike everyone he betrayed, he'll be spared the agony of a slow death."

"And you think I'm just gonna stand by while you turn yourself into a murderer?"

"I appreciate your concern, Terra. But I'm not you."

She looked at him sadly. "…this isn't you either."

He didn't answer. He could hear the hurt in her voice and know he was the cause of it. That stung almost as badly as Sidonis' betrayal. He'd come too far to turn back now, but he was regretting roping her into it. He'd thought he could count on her for anything. He should've known she wouldn't let him do this.

She shook her head. "You didn't finish it."

He looked at her in confusion. "What?"

"That saying you're leaning on? There's more. 'An eye for an eye…makes the whole world blind.'"

He saw her meaning. He didn't know how to respond.

He didn't have to, though. They both turned to the window just in time to see something mechanical moving through the shadows. They quickly ducked away from the glass, both pulling their rifles.

"Did you just see that?" Garrus asked.

"Yeah," Shepard answered, "Looks like Harkin's getting ready for us."

"We'd better keep moving." He turned to open the door to the next room.

"Lead the way. …and Garrus? We're not done."

He sighed. "No…we're not." Before she could respond, he opened the door and rushed out with her right behind him.

The room was filled with mechs, none of which gave Garrus any trouble, and mercs, none of which were a match for Terra. The human and the turian stormed through, taking out with ease anyone who got in their way. Before long, the end was in sight and…

"Ah, crap!" Garrus said, "Two heavy mechs! Incoming!"

Terra quickly followed him behind some crates for cover. Sure enough, two YMIR mechs dropped in from above and immediately started shooting at them both. One they could handle, but with both firing at once, it would be hard to line up shots. Terra was starting to wish they'd brought Tali so she could hack one into firing on the other.

…wait a minute.

Terra groaned. "Oh, I've got a really stupid idea."

Garrus looked at her warily. "Do I want to hear it?"

"No, you'd just agree it was stupid. Cover me." Before he could question her, she ducked around. She stayed low as she moved closer, making Garrus the easier target temporarily, sneaking around to get behind the mech closest to her. Once she could, she climbed onto a crate, ran across it towards the mech, and jumped off to drop onto its head. In the time it took the mech to realize she was on top of it and start attempting to pry her off and slam her into the ground, the other mech caught sight of her and targeted her. Right as both were ready to attack, she kicked back off. The other mech's shot hit this one right in the head with so much force that its claw that was reaching up to grab her essentially punched itself. The damage was enough that one shotgun round from her took it out, leaving the other mech the last one standing.

Once he was clear to, Garrus overloaded the shields on the second mech and fired until it exploded. After the fight was over, he turned to glare at Terra. "That was stupid!" As he stowed his rifle, though, he looked at the remains of the mechs. "…brilliant, well-executed, and effective…but stupid!"

She smirked. "I love you, too." Before he could tell her off again, she nodded to the room Harkin was holed up in. It was a simple climb up. From there, Garrus could sneak around while Terra opened the main door and moved in, holding her pistol up and aiming at Harkin.

Harkin started to back away. "You were close, but not close enough—!" He began to head out the door only for Garrus to cut him off with a gun to the face. As Garrus stowed his weapon, Harkin recoiled in pain, grabbing his nose as if it were broken.

Garrus then grabbed him by the arm and slammed him against the wall. "So, Fade, couldn't make yourself disappear, huh?"

"Come on, Garrus, we can work this out," Harkin pleaded, "What do you need?"

Garrus backed off. "I'm looking for someone."

"Well, then I guess we both have something the other one wants."

Garrus answered that by kicking him in the groin.

Terra stepped over then. "We're not here to bargain or ask favors, Harkin."

"You don't say," Harkin groaned in pain, clutching his gut as he pulled himself back to his feet.

"You helped a friend of mine disappear," Garrus said, "I need to find him."

"I might need a little more information than that."

"His name's Sidonis. Turian, came from the—"

"I know who he is! And I'm not telling you squat! I don't give out client information, it's bad for business."

Garrus then grabbed him by the head and yanked him down to knee him in the chest. When the forger was on the floor, he placed his foot against his collarbone. "You know what else is bad for business? A BROKEN NECK!" Terra actually laughed at that one.

"Alright!" Harkin groaned under the pressure, "Alright! Get off me!"

Terra stopped laughing when she realized the forger was actually in pain, finally placing a hand on Garrus' shoulder to signal him enough was enough.

Harkin caught his breath as Garrus stepped off, dragging himself up from the floor. "Terminus really changed you, huh, Garrus?"

Garrus looked away, casting a fleeting glance to Terra. "…among other things. …Sidonis…opened my eyes." He didn't give himself a chance to see the regret and sorrow in Terra's eyes. He just turned back to Harkin. "Now arrange a meeting."

Harkin got up and looked between him and the nearby console.

Garrus pointedly nodded to it.

"I'm going, I'm going." He went over to the console and activated the call. "Hey. It's me. There's a chance your identity may be compromised."

As the turian on the other end of the line answered, Garrus discreetly began to inspect his rifle.

"That's why I'm calling. I'm sending over an agent. Where do you wanna meet?"

But Terra saw what Garrus was doing. She knew him too well not to know what he was thinking…

"Alright, he'll be there. Don't worry. I got it covered." He then finished the call and walked back over to Garrus. "You're all set. He'll meet you in front of the Orbital Lounge. Middle of the day. So if our business is concluded, I'll just be going—"

Garrus grabbed him before he could make a move. "I don't think so. You're a criminal now, Harkin."

"So, what? You're just gonna kill me? That's not your style, Garrus."

Garrus stared him down for a moment before finally pushing him back. "Kill you? No. …but I don't mind slowing you down a little." He aimed his rifle at Harkin's leg—

Terra made her move the second the gun came up, grabbing hold of his wrist and shifting it so the shot hit the ceiling. "You don't have to shoot him. He can't hide from C-Sec now."

Garrus pushed her off, putting his gun away rather than taking note of the dismayed way she reacted to how callously he'd brushed her aside. "I guess it's your lucky day, Harkin."

"Yeah," Harkin sneered, "I hope we can do this again real soon."

Garrus glared at him and head-butted him. Then he looked back at Terra and saw her giving him a look with her arms folded. "What? I didn't shoot him."

Terra sighed, shaking her head at him as she led him back over to the door. "Come on. Let's get out of here."

"Sidonis better be there. Or I'm coming back to finish the job."

Those words were too far, where Terra was concerned. She stayed quiet as Garrus drove a skycar to the lounge, but the second he parked on a balcony across the way from it, she turned to say something. "What was that?!"

He didn't even look at her. He knew what she meant and he wasn't about to let her talk him down. "Harkin's a menace. We shouldn't have let him go! He deserves to be punished!"

"And he will be. Just not like that! We don't just shoot everybody that ticks us off!"

"We stop people who break the law, don't we?"

"Is this Garrus talking or Archangel?"

He froze when he heard that one. As usual, she saw right through him. Apparently, better than he did.

She didn't like what she was seeing. If this what he had become by losing her, she would've given anything to go back and turn down that mission to wipe out geth that weren't even there. "…Garrus, you're shutting me out."

He was. He couldn't do this. But he had to. His team needed him to do this. She needed him not to. He couldn't say one mattered more than the other, but he refused to push her away. …but Sidonis. Sidonis who he had trusted, who had turned on him, who had left him to die…

"Garrus, it's not too late…" she started trying to talk him down, "…we can just walk away—" She started to reach for him.

That was more than he could take. "TEN MEN ARE DEAD BECAUSE OF HIM!" he finally shouted, storming out of the skycar.

"Will killing the eleventh bring them back?!" she snapped back. When he didn't respond, she got out of the skycar as well and stepped over to him. "I know what it's like to lose the people you care about, to watch them suffer and die. You know I do."

He kept his eyes on the floor, but she could tell those words got to him. "…yeah. I do." He shook his head, not sure what to say. "So where does that leave us?"

She didn't have an answer. She took a step back and sighed. "…I don't know." She couldn't talk him down this time. She could stay here all day and he would just keep breaking. He needed to do something to work this out for himself. The only action he could see to do that was to pull the trigger. Betrayal cut too deep to heal in so brief a time. Vengeance cut even deeper, though—so deep it never healed. And she refused to let him crumble.

Words couldn't solve this. Only action could. Action she had to take.

Realizing what she had to do, she turned to Garrus again. "Alright. What's the plan?"

Garrus had never known her to give up this easily, but they didn't have time to keep arguing. He looked around her at the balcony. "I can get a clear shot from over there."

She followed his gaze and saw the spot he was pointing out, an overlook directly across from the lounge itself. "What do you want me to do?"

"Just get him into position. I'll take care of the rest." He then walked past her to the balcony, drawing his sniper rifle along the way.

She watched him go, then she climbed back into the skycar and drove it down to the lounge.

On the balcony, Garrus peered through the scope at her and turned on his COMM. "Terra? Can you hear me?"

"Loud and clear," she answered into her own as got into position.

Garrus scanned the area until he caught sight of their target. "Alright, there he is. Wave him over and keep him talking."

Terra looked and saw a turian sitting by the lounge entrance. When he looked her way, she gestured for him to come over.

"Let's make this quick," Sidonis said as he stepped up.

"You're in my shot," Garrus warned her, "Move to the side."

Terra didn't. This was it. It was now or never. "Listen, Sidonis, I'm here to help you."

"Don't ever say that name out loud!" Sidonis snapped.

"I'm Garrus' friend. He wants you dead."

"What?! Is this some kind of joke?!"

"TERRA!" Garrus snapped into the COMM, "That does it! If he moves, I'm taking the shot!"

Sidonis noticed Terra responding to the COMM signal. "Oh no…you're not kidding, are you?" When she answered with a look of affirmation, he started to back off. "Forget this. Tell Garrus I've got my own problems." He started to walk away.

Terra quickly grabbed him by the wrist. "Don't move!"

"Get off me!" he snapped, pushing her away.

"I'm the only thing standing between you and a hole in the head!"

Sidonis caught onto her meaning and cursed under his breath. "Look, I didn't wanna do it! I didn't have a choice!"

"Everyone has a choice," Garrus growled from the balcony.

"They got to me! They said they'd kill me if I didn't do it! What was I supposed to do?!"

"Let me take the shot, Terra! He's a filthy coward!"

Terra didn't take his advice. She followed Sidonis to the rails, careful to keep in front of him so Garrus couldn't fire. "That's it? You were just trying to save yourself?!"

"I know what I did," Sidonis said sadly, "I know they died because of me. And I have to live with that. Every night, I wake up sick and sweating, each of their faces staring at me, accusing me. I don't sleep. Food has no taste. I'm already a dead man. Some days…I just want it to be over."

"Just give me the chance," Garrus said.

Terra quickly gave all her attention to her COMM: "Garrus, no."

"He deserves to die!"

"He's already paying!"

"He hasn't paid enough! He still has his life!"

"Look at him! What kind of life is this? There's nothing left to kill."

"My men…they deserved better."

She instantly turned to look up at him. "So do you. Please."

"Tell Garrus…" Sidonis said. He sighed. "Forget it. I guess there's nothing I can say to make it right."

Garrus froze on the balcony, those words tearing through his resolve. This was still the man he had fought beside for nearly two years. As Terra had said about Mordin, one wrong choice didn't have to define him. Terra… She was still standing firmly in his line of fire, knowing he would die before taking the shot with her in the way. The way she was looking at him did as much damage as Sidonis' confession. She needed him right now. If he did this… "…just…go. Tell him to go."

Terra smiled with relief before returning her attention to Sidonis. "He's giving you a second chance, Sidonis. Don't waste it."

"I won't," Sidonis said, "I'll find some way to make it up to you, Garrus!" He looked at Terra. "…thank you…for talking to him."

She nodded at first. Then she turned off her COMM so Garrus couldn't hear her as she spoke to Sidonis directly. "I didn't do it for you. What you did hurt the person I care most about, it nearly killed him. It's not my place to make you pay for that. But if I see you again…"

He shrunk back. "…right. Don't worry. You won't."

She simply stepped away. "Make this right." With that said, she left. Before she took the skycar back up, she looked over to see Sidonis walking away, sullen and reserved. Her words wouldn't go to waste on him.

When she met Garrus on the balcony, she found him slumped in a corner, his sniper rifle laid out in his lap as he looked down at it shakily. "I couldn't do it. I couldn't…"

She sighed as she sat down beside him. "I know."

"This isn't right. My men deserved…" He couldn't say it either. The thought of what he'd just done struck him like a failure, drawing him to throw his rifle over to the skycar with a growl of…fury? Despair? Even he didn't know anymore. "Why couldn't you just let me take the shot?!"

Terra simply looked at him. "…because I love you."

That wasn't the answer he was expecting. He looked at her, not even sure how to react.

She took his hand, letting him see the patience and sympathy in her eyes. "Avenging and vengeance intersect along a very thin line…over a very deep chasm. You were walking that line all night, Garrus…and I couldn't bear to see you fall in."

He clung to her as her meaning sunk in. Looking back on the events of the past few hours, he could see how his drive had blinded him. And through all that, she had been right there, fighting to pull him back. "…you were right. You were warning me all along and I wouldn't listen to you."

"Don't. I'm right here." She laid her head on his, the hand tight around his talons drifting up to softly caress his scars. "I'm never leaving you again. Please don't leave me."

If there was anything that could make him feel like himself again after sinking so deep, it was his human. Her touch, her voice, her affection, her plea…he couldn't deny her anything. Especially not this. "No. Never." He held her close, his inner turmoil fading away with every second her felt her holding onto him in return. Even as he lost himself, she had stayed with him. As if he needed proof that she loved him as much as she claimed. It was only when his gaze drifted over to the balcony that he started to pull away. At long last, he sighed, stepping over to the skycar. "Let's go. I need some distance from this place."

She nodded, following. "Yeah. You and me both."