It was a strange sensation. It felt like so long ago that he was out and the past six months had been a bit of a whirlwind. Addy had settled in reasonably well. A couple of months ago she started to fret and regress. She had picked up a bug and got sick, which freaked Alfie out and from that point she had gone backwards a little asking for her Mom and to go home. She reverted back to calling him Alfie for a few days until she got back on an even keel then 'Daddy Alfie' came back.
Now she had dropped the Alfie again and he was just her Daddy.
Going back to work for Alfie was another hurdle for Addy and she cried for almost all the first day. Rhiannon had the patience of a saint because she was horrid. She didn't want any cuddles, anything to eat or to talk to anyone. When Alfie came to pick her up she stuck to him like glue for the rest of the night and ended up sleeping in his bed.
They could understand why Addy reacted badly and they had tried to wean her off Alfie the last few weeks before he went back to work, he would go out for increasingly longer periods of time, leaving Addy at home but she didn't like it. Going back to work was a whole new kettle of fish though. All Addy remembered was her Mum went to work one day and never came home. Calling her didn't seem to help. She just cried and Daddy disappeared again. 'Alfie come home. I miss you Alfie.'
The only time she talked to Rhiannon was to ask if 'Alfie.' was coming home. Life was tough and confusing for her and the days were long when you are three and had no concept of time, all they could do was reassure her, shower her with love and cuddles and hope for the best.
Rhiannon had told her that Alfie was on this way when she knew he was about two minutes away. They didn't want her waiting too long. She kneeled up at the front window watching for his car and burst into tears when she saw it. Rhiannon's heat broke when she covered her face with one hand and cried, all day she had clung to her echidna and even when she saw Alfie she didn't drop it. He scooped her up and smothered her with kisses. "Don't be sad Addy."
"I miss you."
"I missed you too, like crazy. I am so happy to see you."
When Addy saw him getting dressed for work the next morning she lost it completely and it took superhuman strength to peel her off him when he dropped her off a Rhiannon's. She was hysterical and Rhiannon had another rough day and Alfie kept apologising. He wondered if it was ever going to get better, it had too because this was ripping his heart out.
They made a deal and Addy talked to him at work during the day and being a creature of habit that she was it was what helped her cope with his absence until she started to realise that he would come home. He still called her though, every single day.
But they settled into a rhythm and Addy was doing well. She was starting Pre-Kindy after the Summer Holidays which would hopefully give her some more stability and a chance to meet other children and make friends. She had Sam and Poppy and they all got on well but Alfie wanted her to socialise more.
The Annual Charity Ball was his first big night out since he had Addy with him and she was curious about why everyone was getting all dressed up. She was having a sleep over at Lola's house, which was going to test her but so far she was excited. Alfie had promised that he would come and stay at Lola's after his 'party' so that when she woke up he'd be there. It was the first time she had a sleepover.
"Bug look so pretty." She sat up on Iris's bed and watched her get dressed. They had gone and had a mani-pedi that day and Addy had loved it. She was definitely a girly girl and loved dresses and dressing up. Rhiannon and Heidi had spoilt her rotten and Alfie always grumbled that she was taking over his walk-in closet with all her clothes but he did love how the family had embraced her, he honestly believed it helped her settle in because despite the odd bump in the road he felt she was doing really well.
"Thank you Sweetheart."
"Daddy look pretty too."
"Daddy and Colt looked handsome in their suits." It was cute watching her tell her Daddy that he was 'handstome' before Lola and Sam came to pick her up and they were going out for dinner on the way home.
She waivered a little when Lola said it was time to go. She was torn, going with Sam was fun but she worried about missing her Dad and that he might 'forget' to come get her. "I won't forget you Darlin'." Alfie gave her a big hug. "You are going to keep my bed nice and warm for when I come home. You have fun with Sam and Billy."
"I can sleep in your bed?"
"I hope so." She seemed happy with that.
It was Mae's turn to give the speech at the Dinner, they all took it in turns and she hadn't been last year because Poppy was still a little baby. Alfie milled around, talking to benefactors, chatting with guests and thanking people for their support. He caught the eye of one woman and smiled, almost involuntarily.
"Thank you for supporting this humble little event." He saw her at the bar a little later, trying to get the attention of the bar staff and decided to have a chat.
"It's hardly humble, one of Chicago's most popular events. Or so I am told."
"From little things…they couldn't sell a hundred tickets to the first one."
"Now look at it."
"Mom would be proud."
The blond eyed him up and down and Alfie noticed it. "She's got a lot to be proud of."
Alfie offered her his hand. "Alfie Hollister."
"Nice to meet you Alfie." Her eyes twinkled and Alfie was a little bit lost. He felt out of touch, which was unlike him. Her eyes were an unusual green/grey colour and he was curious. After making him wait a few moments she added. "I'm Quinn."
"I feel like you are teasing me a little."
"No.." she laughed lightly and it was a warm like honey. "…I would never."
"First time here, Quinn?"
"Yes, my boss buys a table every year and because I am new I got a gig, I don't mind, I like getting all dressed up."
"Lucky for me." Alfie ordered her a glass of champagne but just got a water for himself. He was spacing out his drinks knowing that he had Addy at home and she was sleeping with him due to the lack of space at Lola's. Although to be fair even if Lola had a hundred beds Addy would still be in his.
The bar was busy but he always got served quickly because of who he was.
"So, this was all your Mom's idea?"
"Yeah, she wanted Abbey's suicide to mean something, she wanted to make sure she wasn't just forgotten." Suicide prevention didn't mean any more to him now because it had always been something they all had an interest in but it felt different this year. A tragic suicide changed his mother forever and another one, decades later changed his life. It bought him Addy. It was hard to reconcile that, that Jedda's death bought him something that had filled his heart with joy and he loved Addy more than he thought possible but a child was forever without her mother and he'd been there and wouldn't wish it on anyone, especially not his child.
"Well she succeeded. Is it hard?"
"Is what hard?"
"Coming here, when it's all about your Mom? You must miss her? Or don't you remember her?" Quinn didn't know a lot; she knew their parents died a long time ago because his sister had talked about it in her speech. She had no idea how old he was when it happened though. She knew nothing about him. Noticing something flit across his face Quinn apologised for asking such a personal question.
"I do, I remember a bit and I still miss them." He added quietly and then changed the subject and he wasn't the least bit subtle about it. "So, Quinn. What exactly do you do?"
"Physiotherapy."
"Oh, so you are good with your hands?" Alfie knew he was flirting with her and it was giving him a bit of a buzz, he felt himself hitting his stride again. He'd been single a long time and Addy had been a bit of a buzzkill in that regard. Not that she did anything other than appear in his life and he loved having her but at some point, as his sisters kindly pointed out, he had to get back on the horse. He was starting to get crabby. 'Probably got blue balls' Mae grumbled one day when he was being particularly surly and stubborn about something.
"Perhaps." Her green eyes darkened slightly as they twinkled and Alfie was mesmerised by them. She wasn't overdone, there was nothing fake about her at all, her silvery grey dress was figure hugging but still classy, she was the kind of woman he liked. Naturally beautiful, though he'd had his fair share of plastic bimbos in the past. "So… you know what I do?"
"What?" Alfie clutched his chest playfully. "You didn't do your research? Everyone else here seems to know us all intimately." It never ceased to amaze them how many people 'knew' them and what they did. They weren't out there courting fame, they appeared at these dinners every year and a few things for the Foundation and Alfie often did fundraisers for animal conservation but he was pretty certain she wouldn't know him from that, he would have noticed her earlier. Sure this dinner was one of the biggest events in Chicago every year, in the charity space anyway but it wasn't in your face. They didn't go out seeking to hang out with the cool kids, they just did their thing like every other family.
"Really?"
"Well, not like that, but…" he stammered once he figured out what she was hinting at. She was also flirting with him and he liked it, he liked her confidence. "Anyway, I am shocked."
"So Alfie, what occupies your time."
"Animals."
"A vet?"
"Zoologist."
"Ah…like your Dad?"
"You did do research?"
"No, your sister mentioned it." Quinn laughed. "I'm not from Chicago, I grew up just outside Bloomington and moved here for college. This is all new to me, I didn't really know much about it when my Boss asked me to come along and then I did a bit of googling, just to find out what it was for so I know it's for teen suicide and I swear that's it."
"Even better." He tapped his hand on the bar and ordered a drink. "It's weird talking to people who think they know you better than you do. It's creepy to be honest. I don't really get the fascination."
"I do."
"Really?"
"Well I get the fascination in some ways." She blushed knowing that she was making her attraction to him way to obvious. Why wouldn't she be, he was a good-looking guy and seemed kind of sweet and he was flirting with her and the couple of glasses of champagne had done her confidence wonders. "So, what's your favourite animal?"
"Ahhh…good question, nice segue." Alfie made her wait for a moment. "I really love the big African Animals, my Dad loved them and we were always around them when we were growing up. I have a fondness for Australian wildlife too."
"Koala Bears?"
"Koala's yes, not bears. They are incredible things, cute looking but can scratch the shit out of you. I've got this scar up my arm…" he pointed to the position of it under his sleeve. "…one little lady didn't appreciate me trying to get her off a fence she was using to escape."
"Running away from you?"
"I hope not. I think she thought the gum leaves were greener on the other side of the fence. They weren't but she couldn't be told…. Because you know, she's a koala."
"Are there Koala's here?" By here she meant at the zoo they were currently standing in. Every year the ball was held at Lincoln Park Zoo, a tradition that was going to continue for many years yet they hoped. "Not bears, duly noted." She added playfully.
"No, I lived in Australia on and off. I came back about four years ago."
"Why?" Quinn apologised again for asking too many personal questions. "I mean I hear it is beautiful, why would you want to come back to Chicago and the cold."
"My family is here. My Pops is getting old, well not getting old, he is old and he bought us up and I wanted to be with him. He's still kicking around, annoying the crap out of anyone who will listen. He's great."
"You know, your eyes sparkle a little when you talk about your family."
"Don't tell them that."
"Why not?"
"They already have insanely big heads."
Alfie got dragged away soon after, unfortunately he couldn't stand and talk to one person all night, as much as he was enjoying himself. "It's been nice talking to you Quinn." He shook her hand, letting it linger a little bit. It felt warm and comforting.
"Well it made my night, so thank you."
Alfie leant over and whispered something in her ear and she just smiled and nodded. "Good night Alfie." He told her to search the hashtag for the Dinner on Instagram and she'd find him, just like his Mom and Dad had tracked each other so many years ago. 'Only if you want too, of course.'
He tried to find her again, while he thought it was cute to tell her to search for him he was now wishing he'd got her number. What if she didn't find him, or want to find him, he had no idea how to get hold of her. It would take a bit of work to find a Quinn, the physiotherapist in Chicago, time he didn't really have right now. He was obviously out of touch; in the past he never would have walked away without a phone number and on a good day, when he was really in the groove he wouldn't have left without getting her to agree to a date. He was losing touch.
She had got to him, even as he talked to other people and probably got hit on more times than he could count he couldn't shake the blonde with the curious green eyes from his thoughts.
Addy woke up when he got home and that quickly pushed any thoughts of Quinn from his mind. "You home Daddy?"
"I am Darlin', go back to sleep." He waited as she snuggled into him and Ed and with his hand on her belly, feeling it rise and fall he wasn't awake long himself. He was kind of surprised how much he had missed her and he had called Lola from the dinner to check on her. His little girl was everything to him these days and he worried about her constantly, especially his first night away from her. God knows how he was going to do an overnighter, he had babies due soon at the Zoo and it often meant overnight stays.
Addy was up earlier than he hoped. Not only did he have Addy jumping around like a fart in a bottle, Sam soon made an appearance and was invited up onto the bed by Addy. He heard them both giggling as they went to the bathroom together. They were back in a flash and he imagined the mess they'd made. He tried to keep his eyes closed and listen to them talk about breakfast and how they'd like their eggs cooked. It was amusing, or it would've been if it wasn't before 7am.
"Sam, is your Mom awake? I can hear Billy, why don't you both go and see Billy." He was desperate to get them out of his room so he could sleep some more. Sam left and he thought Addy had as well until he heard her huffing a little.
"Daddy." Addy patted him on the face.
"Yes Adelaide."
"You make me eggs?"
"Okay. Ten minutes okay?"
"Okay."
When Alfie didn't move Addy tapped his face again, of course she had no idea of time. "Now?"
"Go and get some knickers on." He saw Addy's bare ass when she jumped up and down. She was gone and back in a flash and sat on the floor trying to get them on, backwards as usual.
Lola found him in the kitchen cooking scrambled eggs with Addy and Sam up at the bench watching him. "This will never get old."
"Nice of you to join us. You could have got up earlier you know and taken care of them."
"I was up earlier, three times." Lola was desperate for a coffee and she allowed herself one cup a day after Billy's morning feed.
"Billy being a turd?"
Addy gasped. "Daddy…that's bad."
"Yes it is Addy…" Lola agreed with her. "…just for that he has to make me eggs too."
"And how is this different from any other time?"
Lola watched Sam and Addy disappear into the lounge. "Why are Sam's pants on inside out?"
"Who knows?" Alfie shrugged. "He's a boy I guess, at least he has pants on."
Lola just laughed and disappeared upstairs, telling Sam to fix his pants on her way through when the baby monitor crackled to life and came back with Billy in time for breakfast. Riley had been on shift all night and would hopefully be home soon to take over for a few hours before he crashed and slept most of the afternoon. "So, how was last night?"
"Good, Mae did good." Alfie watch the kids shovel in the scrambled eggs, spreading half of them around the generally vicinity of where they were sitting. Sam and Addy were joined at the hip and Lola had been exhausted when they finally stopped chattering and went to bed.
"And?"
"And what?"
Lola picked up her phone and read out Iris's message. 'Ask Alfie about the blond at the bar.'
He shrugged. "I was just being a good host, talking to people, trying to get more money out of them."
"Sure."
"You lot are like rabid animals. Why are you so keen on my love life?"
"Because you don't have one and deserve someone Alfie, I want to see you happy."
"I am happy. I have the love of my life right here at the table." He pointed to Addy.
"Me?" Addy loved any attention she got from her Dad, or any one for that matter.
"Yes, you."
"Alfie, come on. It's time to dip the toe into the pond."
"Yeah yeah. In between working fulltime, study and spending time with Addy and looking after Pops. I've got all the time in the world for dating and tell me how I would tell her that she can come back to my place but I've got a 94 year old to look after and a three year old, oh and my sister lives here too and her boyfriend and you might need to sneak out before 4am because then I get a little visitor who takes up way more of my bed than she should."
"Hmmm, good point."
"Or I could go to her place and you know bash and dash."
"Bash and Dash…you are such the romantic."
He grabbed Addy's plate just before it crashed to the floor, he had no idea how she managed to knock it off the table. "You see my dilemma?"
"So you are going to give up?"
"Perhaps, for now. It might be best."
"Pfft." Lola snorted. She was going to need to talk to Mae and Iris and sort something out. He was too nice to be left on the shelf for much longer. His dedication to Addy would be a turn on for the right woman.
It was three days before she contacted him and his heart skipped a beat, he'd almost given up. 'Thank you for the Champagne and the chat, it was fascinating.'
'The pleasure was all mine, trust me. I also buy coffee?'
'I'll keep that in mind. I do like a good coffee.' Alfie invited her to come to the zoo on the weekend as he was working and had to give a keeper talk just before lunch. Quinn left it up in the air a little, said she'd see what she could do but she had no intention of not turning up. She hadn't stopped thinking about him since Saturday night and her best friend had finally convinced her to contact him. She had showed her an Instagram photo of him and asked her what she thought.
"He's cute, very cute."
"He was and very nice and polite, I think we flirted a bit."
"What did he say?"
"That I should check out Instagram and contact him if I wanted too."
"And?"
"I have no idea what to say." Becca just rolled her eyes and told her what to say and once she got the ball rolling she left Quinn to deal with it.
Alfie spotted her as he made his way through the small crowd. He touched her back lightly, making her jump as he spoke. "Good to see you." She looked effortlessly beautiful; blue jeans rolled up at the ankles, a white shirt, a cute trilby hat and vans.
"Oh hi."
"Glad you came. I hope I don't bore you and you leave."
"I hope so too."
He didn't bore her at all. He was funny and had people eating out of the palm of his hand as he talked about the Lion's. He got people involved, especially the kids and Quinn stood back as the crowd dissipated and Alfie stayed and chatted to a few kids and their families. She enjoyed watching him interact with people.
"Right." Alfie headed towards her. "I've got an hour for lunch, how about I buy you a crappy hotdog?"
"So tempting."
"Or we can just grab a coffee?"
"Coffee would be good." She let him guide her through the crowd and he had to stop and talk to people along the way. "That was great. I learnt a lot about Lions."
"I hope so, I'd get the ass if I didn't know what I was talking about."
Alfie ordered them a coffee and then led her towards the large oak tree.
"Mae talked about an Oak tree, is this the tree?"
"It is." Mae had mentioned in her speech that they often came to the Zoo, how on all the big occasions, weddings, births and deaths they always came here to sit with their parents. "I planted it."
"You? What do you mean?"
"The first Christmas after they died I decided I wanted to buy two trees and plant them so we'd have someone to go to remember them. This one here and one in Australia." Alfie looked at the coffee cup in his hand and she got the hint that he wasn't really ready to talk about it. He also didn't want to seem like Debby downer all the time. His past was heavy, he knew that and it was a beast that he struggled to control some days.
"That's incredible, what a beautiful thing."
He asked Quinn about her job, what she loved about it and he told her about his job here and in Australia. They hour passed quicker than he wanted. "I need to get back to work, it's been really nice seeing you again."
"It has, perhaps we can catch up when you've got more time to relax?"
"I'd like that." He asked Quinn for her number but he honestly had no idea how he was going to make it work. "I'll call you soon."
Alfie walked her towards the gate. He suggested she stay and look around but she declined. "One day I will show you around properly. I won't always make you listen to my keeper talks."
"I liked it."
"You should hear the Rhino talk, it's seriously a game changer. It's my best work." She really liked how playful he was, he didn't take himself too seriously and that was nice.
Just before she left though Alfie did get serious…."I've really enjoyed today and Saturday night and I am glad you contacted me but…"
"But? You aren't going to call me again?"
"No…" Alfie saw the pissed off look on her face briefly. "…no, sorry. Yes. Yes I am going to call you." He was rattled, he hadn't really thought this through. "It's not that at all, I'd like to see you again, soon but it's a little challenging." He was talking in circles and he had no idea how to do it so he just dived in. He didn't want to give her any false hope. "I don't have a lot of spare time right now."
"Oh okay."
"Be patient, that's all I am asking. I will call you I promise. I really want to see you again." He looked at his watch again. "Look, I have to go now, I've got another talk to give. My fans are waiting."
Quinn felt deflated. She assumed she'd just go the brush off but part of her had to hang onto the hope. It was all she had right now and the sweet little kiss on the cheek he gave her left her wanting more.
Alfie kind of knew he'd fucked that up and he could kick himself. What the fuck was wrong with him?
He worried all day about how he was going to fix it, he had to try he knew that much.
'Time for a Lion Quiz.' Alfie messaged Quinn once Addy was in bed. He'd got home from work and had taken her out down the park to play and they stopped for dinner on the way home. He always wanted to spend some time with just her at the end of his working week. He was now off for three days and couldn't wait. Addy loved having spending time with her Daddy and then when they were leaving having her little hand in his made him feel like he was on top of the world.
'Well this should be interesting? I've had a few.'
'Lion Quizzes?'
'No that's a new thing, I was a meticulous student, pop quizzes gave me anxiety. Wine on the other hand.'
'Nervous?'
'A little, but dead keen.'
Alfie enjoyed himself and eventually left her alone to enjoy her night out and Quinn had sent him a little sad face, she had enjoyed it as much as he had.
Quinn took the plunge and asked him to go see a band with her on the weekend. They messaged back and forth during the week and he called her a couple of times, usually when he was at work and he'd been on a late shift during the week. It was easier for him to call when he wasn't around Addy, only because when he was with her he wanted Addy to have all his time and attention. She deserved that, he had vowed to be all in with Addy and he hated leaving her to others to look after. When he was working he had no choice so when he was home Addy was his focus.
There was also that part of him that was having anxiety about revealing he had a daughter. He wasn't sure how and when he should do that. It was not something he ever thought he would be thinking about.
He knew he couldn't just say yes to going out with making plans for Addy first but he didn't want Quinn to think he wasn't keen, because he was very keen. He wanted to see her again and see where things went. So he said yes and would work out the rest later.
"Hey Alfie." His head swung around at the sound of his name. He was at the bar getting them a drink before the band started. Charlie greeted him enthusiastically, by the sounds of him he had knocked back a few already. Charlie Ruzek was a wild child; he had hit legal drinking age with a bang and was making the most of his few months of freedom before he hit the academy. "How's it going Cuz?"
"Charlie, I didn't think this would be your jam?"
"Oh it's not but I like the ladies that it brings out." Alfie added Charlies drink to his order and they chatted, or more to the point Charlie filled him in on his latest target. He was a nice guy, but he was young and stupid and his mother would have liked him to be a little less chaotic. Gus was prepared to have to do some sweet talking to keep his nose clean but what could he say? Charlie was just like his Dad and Gus would remind him that his Pops would kick his ass if he treated women like shit, his old man was very particular about that.
He didn't see Quinn until it was too late and she had walked up behind him just as Charlie asked about Addy. "How's that babe Addy? Where is she tonight?" Charlie had a strange look on his face when he saw that Quinn looked at Alfie like she was about to punch his lights out.
Quinn turned on her heel without a word. "Shit." Alfie threw his money on the bar. "Shit."
"What?"
"I hadn't told her about Addy. This is like the second time we've caught up." He didn't want her to find out about it like this, he had no idea when or how to tell her but it wasn't like this. She obviously thought he was an asshole who was cheating on someone. He had to tell her that wasn't him at all.
"Oh fuck man, I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it. Here…" He handed him his drink. "I gotta go."
He saw her leave the bar and took off after her. She was walking up the street trying to hail a cab. "Quinn, wait up." He jogged after her.
"Don't worry about it Alfie. Go home, leave me alone." She shrugged away from him when he reached for her arm. "I guess I know why you don't have much spare time."
"Can I explain? Please?"
"What is there to explain? Why don't you go home to whoever it is you have at home?" She waved her hand wildly and he could sense that she was seriously pissed with him.
"Well hopefully she is asleep in her own bed for once, though I doubt it and my sister isn't letting her eat sugar and watch porn." He paused, waiting to see if she responded. "Adelaide is three." He just blurted it out. "I have a three year old daughter."
"Three?"
"She's three and up until a few months ago I never knew she existed."
"How can you not know?" She spluttered.
"I got a phone call six months ago from Australia, a girl I dated before I came back to Chicago committed suicide and left a three year old girl behind, my daughter. That's how I found out, from a lawyer over the phone. I went back to Australia and bought her back here with me."
"Oh God."
"She's beautiful and for the past six months she is all I thought about. Now I wanted to do something for me. I'm sorry, I didn't want you to find out like this." Alfie tentatively put his hand on her arm. They were folded across her chest like she was protecting herself from him. "It's complicated. I work full-time in an insanely busy job." Alfie was also studying part time to become a qualified Vet. "..and I live with my three year old daughter, my younger sister, her partner and my 94 year old grandfather. I'm messy."
"This is crazy."
"I know, please come back inside. It's true, I begged my sister to stay home and look after her. I don't want to waste my first night out in six months." Quinn didn't look like she was relenting. "I really want to spend some time with you, the ball wasn't enough." Alfie rambled desperately.
"I don't know, I don't feel like going back in. I'm not in a band kinda mood anymore."
"Then let's find somewhere quiet, let me buy you some dinner and I'll tell you about Addy."
"Maybe I should just go home."
"Please Quinn, please. I really want to explain it to you. I like you; I want to get to know you better." Alfie begged her. "We had a good time last weekend right?"
"We did." She nodded. "But this changes everything."
"I know it does and that's why I didn't know how to tell you because I don't want things to change. Wait…" he shook his head. "…that doesn't make sense. I want things to change, I want to get to know you, like a lot, lot more. I'm trying to work out how to do that. This is new for me; I don't know if I am doing things right or wrong and I am thinking right now I've got this wrong?"
"Not wrong, I don't know..." Quinn tilted her head back and stared at the dark night sky, looking for something. Alfie waited, his hand on her arm so she didn't forget he was there. "…Let's get something to eat."
"Great."
"No promises."
"No, no promises." Alfie grabbed her hand. "Except one…I will make you smile again. I promise you that, even if we are still sitting there at 3am." Quinn couldn't help herself, she smiled, just the faintest of smiles but he saw it. "See."
They found somewhere close by and once they were at a table with a drink Alfie told her to ask him anything. "..until dinner arrives ask away."
"I don't know what to ask? It's none of my business." And she honestly didn't, it felt intrusive.
"I'd like it to be your business. Her name is Adelaide and she's beautiful, funny, sweet and smart and very three." Alfie dived in and got the ball rolling trying to make her feel comfortable and the questions started to flow.
"Was it hard?"
"What?"
"Like, finding out like that and meeting her?"
"It was, it freaked me out completely but not once did I think I won't do this, some days I worry that I am fucking it up but the moment I knew, I had to go and get her. Iris came with me and it took almost a month, meeting her, going through the application process and the custody hearing. I was shit scared when I first met Addy but she's amazing."
"Is she okay? Like with everything she's been through."
"We still have bad days, there are still days she asks for her Mum and I can't blame Addy for that, there are still days I want my Mum. Maybe that helps us a little, you know I kinda get what Addy is going through. Iris certainly does, she doesn't remember our parents and Addy won't remember her Mum." Quinn loved the way he said 'mum', it sounded cute, it was almost like a hum but that was not what she should be focusing on right now.
"That's sad. What happened? With Addy's Mom? No, it's okay, don't worry about it." Quinn bit her bottom lip and wished she could take it back. It was always a bad habit of hers, she just asked whatever popped into her head and it had got her in plenty of hot water in the past.
"I said you could ask me anything. Addy's mum Jedda had a really rough upbringing, and I think we were both a little drawn together by that. When my grandmother died I wanted to come home and spend the rest of Pops life here with him, they bought me up and I didn't make it home in time to say goodbye to MiMi, I never got to say goodbye to my parents so I wanted to be here for Pops and show him how much he meant to me."
Quinn did like the way he talked about his grandparents, it was very sweet and earnest. He obviously cared about them a lot.
"She wasn't happy with that and told me if I left I'd never hear from her again but I had to go. I had no idea she was pregnant; she didn't tell me. I didn't know." He wanted to make that clear, he wasn't an asshole, he didn't walk out on his pregnant partner. "As harsh as this sounds, Pops meant more to me than she did, I loved him more. I don't think it's fair to ask someone to choose who to love more, that's surely the polar opposite of love. I don't know." He shrugged. "True to her word I never heard from her again." Alfie was running his hand up and down his knife as he spoke. "Anyway, Jedda took her own life. About a month before she died she changed her name by deed poll to Adelaide Hollister, up until then she'd had been Ingram, her mother's name. I got a call a week after she died, from a lawyer telling me I had a daughter. So I went and got her and I bought her home and my family is helping me raise her."
"I'm sorry."
"It is what it is." Alfie sighed, he had gotten over Jedda a long time ago, but he was still sad that she was gone from Addy's life. "Addy is here now and I am busy trying to figure out how to be a single Dad and to make up for lost time and make sure that Addy has everything she needs, she lost her Mum, I know how that feels."
"I am sure you are doing fine." Quinn touched his hand, the shock for her was wearing off and she still had these crazy feelings whenever she was around him. Alfie showed her a photo of them together. "She's gorgeous. What a precious little face. She looks so happy, you both do." He saw her slightly surprised look when she saw the photo. He was still getting used to that, that people were surprised by her colouring but he rarely chose to explain it.
"Jedda was indigenous, hence Addy's darker skin and hair."
"She looks so beautiful and happy."
"I hope she's happy, I love being with her."
"You know your face is alive too, when you talk about Addy."
"There is nothing better than coming home to that face every day. I had three months off work when she first came home, just to settle in and when I went back to work it was really rough for Addy, and me too I guess but she's good now. I was surprised at how tough it was for me and I can rationalise my feelings, she can't. My family is great and they wanted me to come out tonight because they are worried about me just spending all my time with Addy." Alfie leant forward in his chair. "But seriously you are the first person I've met that I wanted to give up a night a home with my girl for."
"That's sweet."
"I'm sorry you found out like that. That's not what I wanted."
"Alfie, it's okay. I tend to over react when I am disappointed."
"Good to know." He winked at her and sat back and relaxed a little as their dinner arrived. As he promised once dinner came they stopped talking about Addy and he started asking about her. He wanted to know her, about her family, her life and her work.
They jumped in an Uber and Alfie made it wait while he walked her to her door. "I've really enjoyed tonight, despite the rocky start. Can I call you tomorrow?"
"Yes."
Without a moment's hesitation he stepped close to Quinn, held both her cheeks in his hands, smiled sweetly and then kissed her softly, lingering long enough to let her know it wasn't just a polite goodnight kiss, it was a promise for something more. "Good night and Thank you." He pulled away just as quickly, ran his thumbs over her cheeks and turned and jumped in the Uber. If he'd stayed any longer he would have never left.
Quinn was a moment away from asking him to come up. It was once she was inside she started to let the buzz wear off and the reality of the night's revelations started to dawn on her. This was a big deal but was it a deal breaker? Who knew, but she had a serious 'girlfriend' chat to organise and the sooner the better, because the more time she spent with him the harder it would be to walk away and his message didn't help. 'one more second of that kiss and I never would have left.', she tossed and turned all night and realised it was going to take a lot to make her say, thanks but no thanks.
Brianne and Becca could barely wait to see Quinn when she called them and asked them to meet her urgently. They knew she was going out with a new guy last night but she hadn't given them much information. "So?" they met in a small bar, grabbed some wine and waited.
"He's a nice guy, a really nice guy." Quinn gushed and then bit her lip.
"But?"
"No buts…"
"Then why are we here?"
"Well maybe one but…" Quinn had to tell it from the start, she hoped that would help her make sense of it all because having it all swirling around in his head made no sense. "You know that Dinner I went to, the charity one."
"Yes, yes." Becca waved her hand impatiently. "You've told us this."
"Well…" Quinn always ignored her when she didn't want details, just the point of the story. "You know the family that's involved with it? Their mother started it and then she was killed in a car accident with her husband when the kids were young,"
"No." Becca was lying because Quinn had talked about this.
"Anyway, I met the son, Alfie and he very sweet."
"So it's him?"
"It's him." Quinn nodded and took a sip of her wine.
"And?"
"So last night we caught up again, I had met up with him last week at the zoo where he works for a coffee and I watched him give a talk and he's funny and people love him…" She just couldn't stop herself gushing about him. "… and we had this messaging thing going all week and were going to see a band and then he bumped into his cousin at the bar and I overheard his cousin him asking about 'his babe, Addy'."
"That bastard." Becca was quick to write him off.
"Addy is his three year old daughter."
"Wow, what? How the hell?"
"He's a single Dad."
"What do you mean?"
"Her mother passed away six months ago and he had to fly back to Australia and get custody. He didn't know about her until then."
"Fucking hell."
"Oh and the icing on the cake, he lives with his daughter, his younger sister, her partner and his 94 year old grandfather."
"Holy batshit. Full House 2.0." Brianne leaned forward. "So like sex? What's the deal with that?"
"I don't know, I have slept with him."
"Why not?"
"Well, I'm not just jumping into bed with him, that's not my style. Also like where would we do it?"
"Good question." Brianne nodded and Becca was surprisingly quiet for a few moments.
"So you see my dilemma?"
"Dump him, dump and run." Becca was always cut and dried.
"I don't want too. I mean he kissed me last night and I liked it, like really liked it."
Brianne was a little more practical but not a lot. "Don't listen to snooty boots here. Fuck him first and then you can dump him is he's a shit lay."
"I don't know why I always ask you for help. You are both useless." Quinn huffed.
"Do you think he stole her?" Becca mused.
Quinn laughed, although it was a little forced. Brianne and Becca were loving this a bit too much. They had been friends for a while now and she could always count on them to have her back, cheer her up and pick her up when she'd been knocked down. "How or why did your mind go there?"
"Don't know, the wine maybe?" Becca shrugged.
"He didn't steal her; he was awarded custody…legally."
Brianne was a little more level headed. "My opinion?"
Quinn nodded.
"You seem to really like him, give him a chance. So he has a daughter, that's no deal breaker. If he was a dead beat Dad who didn't see or care about his kids, that's a deal breaker, but he's raising her on his own, that gives him a credit." Brianne told her seriously as they flicked through his Instagram. "He is also freakin' hot, and into animals and getting dirty, what's not to like about this snack of a man and if you don't want him, step aside lady and let a real woman at him."
They stirred her when her phone rang and it was Alfie. They were still holding her phone and threatened to answer it and Quinn snatched it back. The last thing she needed was to let them loose on him. They'd send him running for the hills in an instant. They certainly voiced their disappointment when she got up and went outside to talk to him. "Sorry, that's a bit quieter." It had been hard to hear him with the noise of the bar and she didn't trust Becca and Brianne not to start yelling questions at her. "How are you?"
"I'm good. You sound like you are having fun, I can call you later."
"No, it's nice to hear from you."
"I promised I'd call; did you think I'd just given you some line?"
"No, well I hoped not anyway."
"Are you over thinking everything?"
"A little, I'm out with friends."
"And their advice?"
"You don't want to know." She laughed lightly. "I don't do things like that." The few glasses of wine had made her a little loose and he didn't mind at all.
"I wish you did." Alfie loved how happy she was sounding. He was worried that in the cold hard light of day she would think this was all too hard. "Hey, I'd love to see you again. Can I buy you breakfast tomorrow before work; I've got a later start. What time do you start?"
"I start at 11 tomorrow, I'd love breakfast."
"Great, I drop Addy off to my Aunt's by 8, so I'll pick you up just after."
Becca and Brianne planted a seed. "Cook him breakfast at home. He'll like that." Becca winked. "And you know, see what pops up….or in and out."